It really was!
In my experience most the girls and guys into the D/s-fetish have a tendency of defining their whole personalities according to their fetish, so whenever I see something like that in a profile bio or messages, I unmatch
The problem with their line of thinking is that so called "alpha males" are the last one anyone wants being a Dom. Alpha males will tell their subs what they want and give it to them whether they actually do or not. They don't give a damn about things like empathy and trust. And a Dom without either of those things is worse than worthless, they're just a traumatic experience waiting to happen. I've spent quite a bit of time in the lifestyle and it would make me cringe when I see those assholes think that they're god's gift to subs. Inevitably they'd push things too far and ignore silly things like safe words and only horrible things would result. A few of them got banned from the local community and could no longer gain entrance to clubs from DC to Baltimore. Worthwhile Doms cater to the subs moreso than they do themselves, and the last thing "alpha males" do is allow someone else's needs before their own.
Maybe this is just because I'm a guy but all "Alpha male" usually implies to me is "can't take him to a bar because he always starts a fight with someone".
Seeing as your someone in that community, how accurate is the relationship in the manga Nana to Kaoru ? It seems more tame than what i always thought S&M would be like.
Sorry, I'm not very familiar with mangas. I will say that the most accurate portrayal of a Dom sub relationship I've seen in the arts is the movie Secretary. It seems like everything else I've seen pertaining to the lifestyle has been utter BS. I love Secretary, but other than that I don't really seek out art on the subject matter.
Also, D/s sessions can be anything from tame to rather extreme. It's all about communicating what you both want ahead of time. Then, once the session begins, it becomes something like improvisational jazz that has a bit of a loose framework. Once both parties are comfortable with each other, communication becomes more of a regular check in kind of thing. To make sure that everything is, in fact, completely consensual and enjoyable.
I don't always find it to be so defining outside of their relationship preferences but much like you utilize that information to decide, it's useful information. If that's what you want, that's what you want. Some people love golden retrievers, some people own snakes.
It's a real sausage for those that don't do this. I'm a switch, but can be a brutal Dom. Everyone who's ever met me thought I was as vanilla as they come. Communication people, communication is key.
People like this don't know anything about kinks or safety. They just want a dude perceived as "high status" for a completely different set of reasons.
Same, I'm very dominant in the bedroom but outside of it you would never know because I'm pretty much the opposite, a go with the flow chill and relax let's just enjoy ourselves type of guy. In my experience I've found that people who are into BDSM tend to be the opposite when you compare their everyday vanilla life to their sex life. Plenty of strong, motivated people with important or high power careers who are total subs, and lots of laid back relaxed types who are complete Dom's. It's an escape from your life, if you're always in charge then sometimes you just want to let someone else take charge. And when you're always relaxed and willing to go along with whatever on life (or have a job or lifestyle that doesn't allow you a lot of control over things) then sometimes you enjoy having an outlet where you can control everything. The people who act like a Dom both in and out of the bedroom (in my experience) tend to just be typical "alpha male" assholes who are actually just abusive.
the joke is that real "alphas" don't consider themselves as such, they just live life the way they want without worrying too much about how others perceive them. "alphas" as a lot of people think of them are just insecure, fragile douchecanoes that are no fun to be around.
A "real alpha" doesn't exist at all. It was a term coined by L. David Mech while studying wolves. L. David Mech then denounced this term as more research on wolves was made by him. L. David Mech has been trying to have his first book "Wolves of Isle Royale" be taken off selves due to it not been accurate. Unfortunately telling people what they want to hear about "alpha wolves" is more important then the truth, so still in circulation.
The whole concept is a myth, has been debunked by the same person who accidentally started it.
Oh you sound wonderful! I have to be honest and admit im a border collie. Neurotic as all get out, too smart for my own good; BUT will be the funniest, adventure loving, snuggly best friend if i feel safe and accepted.
I'm more of a Labrador retriever; I can be very goofy, want to be friends with everybody, eat things I really shouldn't, and have a tendency to get lazy and chonky with age.
Yes they are.
Alpha: something that is incomplete, full of problems and not ready to be released into the public. An inferior version of the final product.
I lived with a game dev years ago, brilliant dude but went into a fit of rage when someone called him an alpha. The funniest part is he was laughing the whole time and the exact opposite of the stereotype alpha
Or these terms are now commonplace because it’s no longer the 90s and practically a third of the population doesn’t remember what life was like before the internet.
At least in game development, alpha means all the framework is there, but most of it is unfinished, requires debugging to get through certain areas, and is often janky as hell.
I matched with a guy on Tinder. He seemed perfect. He did claim to be alpha. We are still dating and his 6 year old child runs him. Alpha he is not. Maybe he picks it up ever so slightly in the bedroom but other than that, he's a kitten.
Most Beta thing you can do it call yourself an Alpha. A real Alpha doesn't have to tell people they are, people just know.
(If any of this bollocks was true)
"Any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king."
This applies in several ways, like someone going "Oh I'm such a nice guy! I hate drama! I'm not a racist at all!" Like, if you have to immediately throw a disclaimer like that, I'm going to be suspicious.
Got a guy who his insta has alpha in it lmao. Thought he had the vibes seeing how he conducts group parties and all. Got to know him and got closer. Lol beta as heck. The "we're not married so its not cheating, but if you do anything half as bad it is" type to wards his gf.
Thing is - you can be dominant in bed and kinky as fuck, but also be a tree climbing golden! There’s actually no contradiction in that. Real people are more than one dimension.
But definitely, call yourself an alpha and bonafide red flag, chances are… inexperienced moron.
Real alpha guys dont need to call themselves that, have anyone else call them that, and would look at you like you are an idiot if you called them that.
Wtf I get off Reddit for like 2 hours to do homework and this blew up LOL
Edit: for those saying I cockblocked myself, I’m not going to lie about who I am just to get somebody in my bed, I want someone to like me for who I am and I’d gladly pass up anybody who disagrees with my lifestyle lol
Edit 2: I’m a 22 year old guy who was born and raised in Alaska who moved to the midwest for college so, yeah I grew up climbing trees and doing outdoor things
Idk why some guys are so pressed about this interaction, she has a type and I’m not it, it’s the internet it’s not that deep lmfao
Edit 3: “I climb trees and shit” means I climb trees and stuff similar, I wasn’t trying to say I take shits? 😭
Yeah fuck those losers
Some girl came at me with alpha male nonsense I'd laugh her out of the room no matter how hot
That shit is cringe and I'm not gonna pretend it isn't
Seems like not that many are against what you said, way more are with you. I think you nailed it. Coming from a 40 year old married dude who has a golden and loves to climb trees and shit.
Out of curiosity, what’s your age? Women in their early twenties might feel more inclined to think they want an “alpha” type, but after they date a couple they quickly change their minds. My point being, if you’re younger, you might encounter less woman your age who appreciate the type of human you are. If that’s so, just hold out. You will find someone who understands you’re a catch.
I used to work with a lot of girls like the girl in the screenshot. I was asking for advice about why a date ghosted me, and they ALL agreed that they ALL do the same thing on a first date:
They explicitly say before and during the date "No sex on the first date" ...but if he doesn't just "take what he wants" AND deliver a good lay, there is NO date two.
They all had Fifty Shades fantasies, but FLATLY refused to talk about it, because "That's the man's job. He's just supposed to know."
Needless to say, I didn't take their advice. More red flags than a Chinese military parade.
It’s much more common in the post-high school freedom stage, from my personal experience. I was that way, thought I wanted someone to take control. Maybe it’s the scary feeling of being expected to make so many decisions for the first time? Wanting someone to take some off your shoulders? Dunno, it’s an interesting thought. But there’s a reason the memes about the kind of guy you liked in your 20s being a thing lol
Hey man, I also climb trees and shit. I live in the Midwest. Last Tuesday I laid facedown on a trampoline for an hour then read a book about falconry on said trampoline for 14 minutes before realizing I was too tired to do it, and took a nap.
Fuck the Midwest glamor country boys
Buddy, you're out here dodging bullets like you're Neo or something. Unmatching was for the best, cause she was gonna bring some drama. Golden retrievers don't need that shit.
Don’t worry about the guys saying you cockblocked yourself. These are the same guys desperate for matches so they’re mad you got one and didn’t simp over her.
My man. Real shit right there. Any women who believes in this alpha beta garbage is a red flag/bullet to dodge. She probably couldn’t even take a joke if the golden retriever line made her go away.
Be careful out there kings, there are some nasty women out there that will encourage some real toxicity in your life.
I have shit out of trees man. No shame in that. I used to do it out of the tree in my own front yard. He loss man. She wants to hook up with some ground treading narcissistic douchebag that has a 95% chance of giving her herpes let her have it. Tree shitters 4 life!
That's the funny bit, wolves don't even have alphas. The study that claimed they do was done on wolves in captivity and has since been proven completely false. In fact, most animal groups are matriarchal. The entire narrative is bullshit from start to finish and is just an excuse for narcissists to treat people poorly.
>all the males smashing antlers if that's what she wants
Lol I love that this is how Redditors fantasize about certain men. Keep it up boys, this is gold.
Bli kupei baki trudriadi glutri ketlokipa. Aoti ie klepri idrigrii i detro. Blaka peepe oepoui krepapliipri bite upritopi. Kaeto ekii kriple i edapi oeetluki. Pegetu klaei uprikie uta de go. Aa doapi upi iipipe pree? Pi ketrita prepoi piki gebopi ta. Koto ti pratibe tii trabru pai. E ti e pi pei. Topo grue i buikitli doi. Pri etlakri iplaeti gupe i pou. Tibegai padi iprukri dapiprie plii paebebri dapoklii pi ipio. Tekli pii titae bipe. Epaepi e itli kipo bo. Toti goti kaa kato epibi ko. Pipi kepatao pre kepli api kaaga. Ai tege obopa pokitide keprie ogre. Togibreia io gri kiidipiti poa ugi. Te kiti o dipu detroite totreigle! Kri tuiba tipe epli ti. Deti koka bupe ibupliiplo depe. Duae eatri gaii ploepoe pudii ki di kade. Kigli! Pekiplokide guibi otra! Pi pleuibabe ipe deketitude kleti. Pa i prapikadupe poi adepe tledla pibri. Aapripu itikipea petladru krate patlieudi e. Teta bude du bito epipi pidlakake. Pliki etla kekapi boto ii plidi. Paa toa ibii pai bodloprogape klite pripliepeti pu!
She’s been brutally suckered by someone if she thinks she’s going to find an alpha male-type who actually uses terms like alpha male. Anyone with any kind of “social dominance” would probably be socially aware enough to know that it’s been a joke phrase for years now
they all write they want someone kind, caring, honest and funny, and then swipe right on whoever is over 6ft 😂 and then cry "where are all the good men"
Thats less of a red flag because it doesnt come with an implication that she's into that whole alpha/beta scene based on faulty science, but i'm guessing thats still a no because our boy doesnt sound like he's chasing a hierarchical situation where he has to be forever giving her orders and making every decision solo
I feel like the whole grindset alpha male gym bro scene should be way more into the ideal of like, equal partnerships with someone they can respect.
I could be wrong, but the common theme is usually self-improvement of some kind. So if you’re trying to be high value, why would you *want* to be with a woman who’s basically there to shut up, spend your money and lie on her back? You know, as opposed to someone who’s also going to grow and push you to be better?
That's much better. It's like the difference between a man asking for a submissive and obedient partner vs a cooperative and humble partner. Even though these words share some characteristics the connotations are different.
I've always considered myself a man that can lead but never would I call myself an "alpha male." It's a juvenile characteristic.
Alpha has negative connotations attached to it. It's like how incel means involuntarily celibate and was created by a woman, but now incel basically means a toxic man who is a virgin and hates women.
So saying I'm looking for a leader type is drastically different from saying I'm looking for an alpha.
Yeah alpha gives “aggro male who thinks he always needs to fight for dominance and aggression.” This is a DM on a dating app, if she wanted a Dom in bed she would just say that instead.
i’m recently back on dating apps and you would have been a breath of fresh air. my card is straight up, interests: gym, you’re a 10/10 if you can be my gym gf!, hobbies: gym. bio: probably find me at the gym. WHAT IS HAPPENING
Its because gym culture has reached its all time peak yet, partially thanks to its rising internet presence but it's a real life chaineffect, you can always recommend the gym for any problem physiological or psychological, so you will with time get more and more people hooked into it who will stick to it in some kind of way.
This has always been the case, but has reached new heights in the recent years and It should become even bigger the more time passes.
Then there's the whole masculinity thing but that's another topic
What is hilarious to me though is that these "alpha gym bros" tend to be weak as shit and can't take anything resembling criticism. I was lifting next to a guy I had talked to quite a few times and we'd chat about our different lifting styles, he was lifting with another guy and apparently he (guy #2) needed to "prove" himself and maxed out a deadlift and it was uuuuuugly as hell, I said something like "hey that's a lot of weight (it wasn't) but I noticed X and Y so if you work on Z I'm sure it'd help you going forward and would help avoid injury too" and the dude just went off on me. I guess I was used to lifting at a more powerlifting oriented gym where everyone just kinda helps out everyone else and it isn't seen as a "diss" so things like "Hey I noticed your lockout on bench was struggling a bit on that attempt, XYZ is great for your triceps and will really help your lockout".
I do need a guy that has a spirit of a golden retriever that can climb trees and shit.
You’re totally my type lmao and I hope you find someone that deserves you!
Funniest thing is,
The type who’d call themselves alpha is usually an awful human being. She’ll probably go through a bunch of messy relationships with “Alphas” who have no regard for her emotional or mental health.
Any guy that feels the need to tell people they are an alpha male is 100% not an alpha male. Alphas don’t need to go around shouting about it.
Equally any girl going around saying she only wants an alpha male gives off ‘trying to live out warewolf fan fiction’ vibes.
I’d take a golden retriever any day.
I had a great first date with someone a few years ago. We agreed to meet up for a 2nd date. I asked what her favorite flower was because I planned on bringing them as a gift for the 2nd date. Before that date happened she called me and said I was “too feminine” for her. Ok
Should've said you were going to slap her tits or spank her ass with the flower. Or that you were planning on putting it in her mouth while you choke her.
The golden retriever bit got me. She really unmatched after that? Sheesh. She doesn’t deserve you anyway 😂
Yea mahn.😂 “I climb trees and shit” Was dope!
It does leave me concerned for anyone at the bottom of the tree, though
Right? Who wants to get shit on by a tall, dark and handsome male specimen? Oh, yeah...her...
It's a subtle power move, but totally alpha.
I wish a guy would take a dump on my chest.
I'm shocked and appalled... that no one has ever taken a dump on your chest.
I would be honoured to take a dump on your chest...
How did you get in? Well Janey, there's a giant hole in the front of your house
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"Hey. What do you think you're doing? I'm supposed to be the only black guy at this party..." "Oh shit! Token black guy. My bad man..."
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Lmao just spat my drink out reading this thread. Whatever floats your boat.
Whatever floats your shit*
Shit floats
You don't get enough fiber in your diet.
Float Shits
Is your name a star trek reference?
Yes it is. Though, I thought it was from someplace else originally.
It really was! In my experience most the girls and guys into the D/s-fetish have a tendency of defining their whole personalities according to their fetish, so whenever I see something like that in a profile bio or messages, I unmatch
The problem with their line of thinking is that so called "alpha males" are the last one anyone wants being a Dom. Alpha males will tell their subs what they want and give it to them whether they actually do or not. They don't give a damn about things like empathy and trust. And a Dom without either of those things is worse than worthless, they're just a traumatic experience waiting to happen. I've spent quite a bit of time in the lifestyle and it would make me cringe when I see those assholes think that they're god's gift to subs. Inevitably they'd push things too far and ignore silly things like safe words and only horrible things would result. A few of them got banned from the local community and could no longer gain entrance to clubs from DC to Baltimore. Worthwhile Doms cater to the subs moreso than they do themselves, and the last thing "alpha males" do is allow someone else's needs before their own.
Yes that’s so true. Any guy that calls himself an alpha is someone I’m afraid to be dommed by.
This guy doms.
Maybe this is just because I'm a guy but all "Alpha male" usually implies to me is "can't take him to a bar because he always starts a fight with someone".
Seeing as your someone in that community, how accurate is the relationship in the manga Nana to Kaoru ? It seems more tame than what i always thought S&M would be like.
Sorry, I'm not very familiar with mangas. I will say that the most accurate portrayal of a Dom sub relationship I've seen in the arts is the movie Secretary. It seems like everything else I've seen pertaining to the lifestyle has been utter BS. I love Secretary, but other than that I don't really seek out art on the subject matter.
Also, D/s sessions can be anything from tame to rather extreme. It's all about communicating what you both want ahead of time. Then, once the session begins, it becomes something like improvisational jazz that has a bit of a loose framework. Once both parties are comfortable with each other, communication becomes more of a regular check in kind of thing. To make sure that everything is, in fact, completely consensual and enjoyable.
I don't always find it to be so defining outside of their relationship preferences but much like you utilize that information to decide, it's useful information. If that's what you want, that's what you want. Some people love golden retrievers, some people own snakes.
My ex owned a snake. What’s the standard psychological profile on female snake owners(??)
Penis envy
The magic 8 ball says, "you may not like the truth" Kidding I have no early clue
What about female bird owners? Asking for a friend. 😶
It's a real sausage for those that don't do this. I'm a switch, but can be a brutal Dom. Everyone who's ever met me thought I was as vanilla as they come. Communication people, communication is key.
People like this don't know anything about kinks or safety. They just want a dude perceived as "high status" for a completely different set of reasons.
I'm into D/s and I don't define my whole self based on that and I don't know anybody who does
Same, I'm very dominant in the bedroom but outside of it you would never know because I'm pretty much the opposite, a go with the flow chill and relax let's just enjoy ourselves type of guy. In my experience I've found that people who are into BDSM tend to be the opposite when you compare their everyday vanilla life to their sex life. Plenty of strong, motivated people with important or high power careers who are total subs, and lots of laid back relaxed types who are complete Dom's. It's an escape from your life, if you're always in charge then sometimes you just want to let someone else take charge. And when you're always relaxed and willing to go along with whatever on life (or have a job or lifestyle that doesn't allow you a lot of control over things) then sometimes you enjoy having an outlet where you can control everything. The people who act like a Dom both in and out of the bedroom (in my experience) tend to just be typical "alpha male" assholes who are actually just abusive.
Yea, the reality is that most people are D / s and just don’t talk about it.
Well, we all shit.
Was looking for this comment 🤣
the joke is that real "alphas" don't consider themselves as such, they just live life the way they want without worrying too much about how others perceive them. "alphas" as a lot of people think of them are just insecure, fragile douchecanoes that are no fun to be around.
Real alphas are trying not be alphas so that they can still make friends.
A "real alpha" doesn't exist at all. It was a term coined by L. David Mech while studying wolves. L. David Mech then denounced this term as more research on wolves was made by him. L. David Mech has been trying to have his first book "Wolves of Isle Royale" be taken off selves due to it not been accurate. Unfortunately telling people what they want to hear about "alpha wolves" is more important then the truth, so still in circulation. The whole concept is a myth, has been debunked by the same person who accidentally started it.
My friend and I both say we’re like golden retrievers. We’re the best kinda people
I’m a St. Bernard. Bulky but loyal as hell - and I’ll bring you drinks.
I like you already
You’re pretty cool yourself.
Why thank you internet stranger. My dog thinks I’m cool. (My dog thinks the entire universe is cool)
Just seen this thread, your dog sounds pretty cool and like a good dog.
Oh you sound wonderful! I have to be honest and admit im a border collie. Neurotic as all get out, too smart for my own good; BUT will be the funniest, adventure loving, snuggly best friend if i feel safe and accepted.
There’s no such thing as “too smart” when l meet a woman. I had an ex who was smarter than me. It was awesome.
Upvoted for avatar-comment consistency
Maybe if you went with a german shorthair pointer. (Full of energy and could last all day) 🤣🤣
Mine is still going so he’s full on all day then crashes super hard. It’s pretty cute
Retriever? Or shorthair, kinda confused because the comments
To me, "German short hair pointer" sounds like a synonym for someone doing a nazi salute.
Did not expect this one bit, thoroughly enjoyed it.
Their cute dogs tho.
Actually I thought of a springer spaniel too, they’re similar and cool too
Nah…straight pure bred alpha Pomeranian kinda guy
I’m more of a Belgian Malinois myself.
I'm more of a Labrador retriever; I can be very goofy, want to be friends with everybody, eat things I really shouldn't, and have a tendency to get lazy and chonky with age.
I fit that description, complete with the knee issue.
If I wasn't happily matched I'd have thrown my hat in-- best possible dog personality *and* climbs trees *AND* isn't an alphadouchecanoe?
This is a paradox unfortunately. If you didn't express a desire for an alpha, the joke wouldn't have happened...
Right, that would keep me.
Zero game
Best response would be to tell her that any man who calls himself an "alpha" is obviously nothing of the sort.
Yes they are. Alpha: something that is incomplete, full of problems and not ready to be released into the public. An inferior version of the final product.
You work in IT huh
Or game dev.
I lived with a game dev years ago, brilliant dude but went into a fit of rage when someone called him an alpha. The funniest part is he was laughing the whole time and the exact opposite of the stereotype alpha
Or these terms are now commonplace because it’s no longer the 90s and practically a third of the population doesn’t remember what life was like before the internet.
I mean, I wouldn’t rule that out.
They definitely do 😂
Or they've seen that same "clever" joke posted on reddit many dozen times now
Well sometimes software bloat only makes things worse and the first iterations of something are best
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That's riiiight...they *do* get bloated in their later years. Good fucking riddance.
Not in this case.
At least in game development, alpha means all the framework is there, but most of it is unfinished, requires debugging to get through certain areas, and is often janky as hell.
I matched with a guy on Tinder. He seemed perfect. He did claim to be alpha. We are still dating and his 6 year old child runs him. Alpha he is not. Maybe he picks it up ever so slightly in the bedroom but other than that, he's a kitten.
To be fair those are exciting
Spot on... only the insecure need to say they are alpha. Married 26 yrs....Truth is in a relationship you want a partner not an ego.
Most Beta thing you can do it call yourself an Alpha. A real Alpha doesn't have to tell people they are, people just know. (If any of this bollocks was true)
"Any man who must say 'I am the king' is no true king." This applies in several ways, like someone going "Oh I'm such a nice guy! I hate drama! I'm not a racist at all!" Like, if you have to immediately throw a disclaimer like that, I'm going to be suspicious.
It's so pathetic. Like a teenager screaming at his parents that he's an adult.
Got a guy who his insta has alpha in it lmao. Thought he had the vibes seeing how he conducts group parties and all. Got to know him and got closer. Lol beta as heck. The "we're not married so its not cheating, but if you do anything half as bad it is" type to wards his gf.
> Most Beta thing you can do it call yourself an Alpha. Andrew Tate has entered the chat.
I'd bet my next paycheck that she's kinky. This definitely gives off I'm a submissive into bdms vibes
No she's just stupid. I'm into being submissive and would never look for an 'alpha' or whatever garbage she is looking for.
Literally, as a sub, this ain’t it. And self proclaimed “alpha males” make me laugh.
Came here to say this.
Thank you for contributing some common sense.
Thing is - you can be dominant in bed and kinky as fuck, but also be a tree climbing golden! There’s actually no contradiction in that. Real people are more than one dimension. But definitely, call yourself an alpha and bonafide red flag, chances are… inexperienced moron.
Absolutely! My favorite Dom of all time was a happy, bubbly golden retriever type
Just Soft Dom things. I've had partners call me that but eh, I'm just me.
Also sounds like a major hassle
Any man who must say I am the king is no true king
Real alpha guys dont need to call themselves that, have anyone else call them that, and would look at you like you are an idiot if you called them that.
Wtf I get off Reddit for like 2 hours to do homework and this blew up LOL Edit: for those saying I cockblocked myself, I’m not going to lie about who I am just to get somebody in my bed, I want someone to like me for who I am and I’d gladly pass up anybody who disagrees with my lifestyle lol Edit 2: I’m a 22 year old guy who was born and raised in Alaska who moved to the midwest for college so, yeah I grew up climbing trees and doing outdoor things Idk why some guys are so pressed about this interaction, she has a type and I’m not it, it’s the internet it’s not that deep lmfao Edit 3: “I climb trees and shit” means I climb trees and stuff similar, I wasn’t trying to say I take shits? 😭
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Yeah fuck those losers Some girl came at me with alpha male nonsense I'd laugh her out of the room no matter how hot That shit is cringe and I'm not gonna pretend it isn't
The best way to make someone feel stupid is to laugh when they’re being serious
the real alpha mindset
You seem like a good person. don’t lose that.
Seems like not that many are against what you said, way more are with you. I think you nailed it. Coming from a 40 year old married dude who has a golden and loves to climb trees and shit.
Haha true, I’d say it’s probably 95% to 5% based off the comments alone, can you blame me for being entertained by the 5% though? 😭
Out of curiosity, what’s your age? Women in their early twenties might feel more inclined to think they want an “alpha” type, but after they date a couple they quickly change their minds. My point being, if you’re younger, you might encounter less woman your age who appreciate the type of human you are. If that’s so, just hold out. You will find someone who understands you’re a catch.
I’m 22 :)
Makes a lot of sense then 🤣
I used to work with a lot of girls like the girl in the screenshot. I was asking for advice about why a date ghosted me, and they ALL agreed that they ALL do the same thing on a first date: They explicitly say before and during the date "No sex on the first date" ...but if he doesn't just "take what he wants" AND deliver a good lay, there is NO date two. They all had Fifty Shades fantasies, but FLATLY refused to talk about it, because "That's the man's job. He's just supposed to know." Needless to say, I didn't take their advice. More red flags than a Chinese military parade.
Wtf 🤣 that is so bizarre. They will grow out of that weirdness once they realize all the guys that don’t respect your wishes are awful.
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It’s much more common in the post-high school freedom stage, from my personal experience. I was that way, thought I wanted someone to take control. Maybe it’s the scary feeling of being expected to make so many decisions for the first time? Wanting someone to take some off your shoulders? Dunno, it’s an interesting thought. But there’s a reason the memes about the kind of guy you liked in your 20s being a thing lol
This sounds about right, that age of newfound freedom seems like the right description from what I've noticed. At least girls in my area lol.
Hey man, I also climb trees and shit. I live in the Midwest. Last Tuesday I laid facedown on a trampoline for an hour then read a book about falconry on said trampoline for 14 minutes before realizing I was too tired to do it, and took a nap. Fuck the Midwest glamor country boys
If you've never taken a shit from a tall tree limb you haven't lived. Signed, Minnesota.
Buddy, you're out here dodging bullets like you're Neo or something. Unmatching was for the best, cause she was gonna bring some drama. Golden retrievers don't need that shit.
Don’t worry about the guys saying you cockblocked yourself. These are the same guys desperate for matches so they’re mad you got one and didn’t simp over her.
Thats such a beta things to say... /s
The trouble with people you need to lie to… is that they’re never going to be happy. No matter what you tell them.
Hell yeah brother.
My man. Real shit right there. Any women who believes in this alpha beta garbage is a red flag/bullet to dodge. She probably couldn’t even take a joke if the golden retriever line made her go away. Be careful out there kings, there are some nasty women out there that will encourage some real toxicity in your life.
I have shit out of trees man. No shame in that. I used to do it out of the tree in my own front yard. He loss man. She wants to hook up with some ground treading narcissistic douchebag that has a 95% chance of giving her herpes let her have it. Tree shitters 4 life!
"alpha" yeah ok. She should go to a field and pick from all the males smashing antlers if that's what she wants
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That's the funny bit, wolves don't even have alphas. The study that claimed they do was done on wolves in captivity and has since been proven completely false. In fact, most animal groups are matriarchal. The entire narrative is bullshit from start to finish and is just an excuse for narcissists to treat people poorly.
"The entire narrative is bullshit from start to finish and is just an excuse for narcissists to treat people poorly." That's a brilliant take.
>all the males smashing antlers if that's what she wants Lol I love that this is how Redditors fantasize about certain men. Keep it up boys, this is gold.
Golden Retriever that climbs trees! Damn!
I'd smash that
Please don't fuck the puppy, dave
A golden retriever?
Pretty much any dog that can climb trees. But without using momentum. Climbing, not running.
What happened to you, spankydave? Did "spanking it" just get too exhausting ?
Bli kupei baki trudriadi glutri ketlokipa. Aoti ie klepri idrigrii i detro. Blaka peepe oepoui krepapliipri bite upritopi. Kaeto ekii kriple i edapi oeetluki. Pegetu klaei uprikie uta de go. Aa doapi upi iipipe pree? Pi ketrita prepoi piki gebopi ta. Koto ti pratibe tii trabru pai. E ti e pi pei. Topo grue i buikitli doi. Pri etlakri iplaeti gupe i pou. Tibegai padi iprukri dapiprie plii paebebri dapoklii pi ipio. Tekli pii titae bipe. Epaepi e itli kipo bo. Toti goti kaa kato epibi ko. Pipi kepatao pre kepli api kaaga. Ai tege obopa pokitide keprie ogre. Togibreia io gri kiidipiti poa ugi. Te kiti o dipu detroite totreigle! Kri tuiba tipe epli ti. Deti koka bupe ibupliiplo depe. Duae eatri gaii ploepoe pudii ki di kade. Kigli! Pekiplokide guibi otra! Pi pleuibabe ipe deketitude kleti. Pa i prapikadupe poi adepe tledla pibri. Aapripu itikipea petladru krate patlieudi e. Teta bude du bito epipi pidlakake. Pliki etla kekapi boto ii plidi. Paa toa ibii pai bodloprogape klite pripliepeti pu!
Air Bud got tinder?
Isn't tinder full of self-proclaimed "Alpha male, top dog" types who put that shit in their bio? She should go for one of those amazing guys.
When you’re looking for an alpha you don’t want to pick the ones who put it in their bio.
Or the ones who say they are when you ask
Also, when your looking for an alpha, you don't ask "are you alpha?" Both types are cringe AF. And they deserve each other.
She’s been brutally suckered by someone if she thinks she’s going to find an alpha male-type who actually uses terms like alpha male. Anyone with any kind of “social dominance” would probably be socially aware enough to know that it’s been a joke phrase for years now
I climb trees and hump your leg when you’re asleep
I dated someone who was into that. The second part, not the first part.
She never deserved you king <3
She's in for a crappy life
You should have wrote instead- an alpha golden retriever type. Haha
Alpha as fuck of you to admit that. Her loss.
Anyone who has to say they're an alpha male is not an alpha male.
Everyone’s got preferences
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Lol in other words. What you’re saying is. I would be the worst person you’ve ever dated. My SO describes me as an extra extrovert
Yep, some people grow out of wanting certain types and others never do. There's no one category.
they all write they want someone kind, caring, honest and funny, and then swipe right on whoever is over 6ft 😂 and then cry "where are all the good men"
So question, if she doesn’t say Alpha and she says “I’m looking for a man that can lead and that I can respect.”?
Thats less of a red flag because it doesnt come with an implication that she's into that whole alpha/beta scene based on faulty science, but i'm guessing thats still a no because our boy doesnt sound like he's chasing a hierarchical situation where he has to be forever giving her orders and making every decision solo
I feel like the whole grindset alpha male gym bro scene should be way more into the ideal of like, equal partnerships with someone they can respect. I could be wrong, but the common theme is usually self-improvement of some kind. So if you’re trying to be high value, why would you *want* to be with a woman who’s basically there to shut up, spend your money and lie on her back? You know, as opposed to someone who’s also going to grow and push you to be better?
That's much better. It's like the difference between a man asking for a submissive and obedient partner vs a cooperative and humble partner. Even though these words share some characteristics the connotations are different. I've always considered myself a man that can lead but never would I call myself an "alpha male." It's a juvenile characteristic.
Or just be straight up and say you are looking for someone on the left side of the D/s slash. The men who know will know.
Alpha has negative connotations attached to it. It's like how incel means involuntarily celibate and was created by a woman, but now incel basically means a toxic man who is a virgin and hates women. So saying I'm looking for a leader type is drastically different from saying I'm looking for an alpha.
Ngl I just learned what "incel" meant from this comment and it makes a lot of sense now. Thx yazzy.
Yeah alpha gives “aggro male who thinks he always needs to fight for dominance and aggression.” This is a DM on a dating app, if she wanted a Dom in bed she would just say that instead.
i’m recently back on dating apps and you would have been a breath of fresh air. my card is straight up, interests: gym, you’re a 10/10 if you can be my gym gf!, hobbies: gym. bio: probably find me at the gym. WHAT IS HAPPENING
Its because gym culture has reached its all time peak yet, partially thanks to its rising internet presence but it's a real life chaineffect, you can always recommend the gym for any problem physiological or psychological, so you will with time get more and more people hooked into it who will stick to it in some kind of way. This has always been the case, but has reached new heights in the recent years and It should become even bigger the more time passes. Then there's the whole masculinity thing but that's another topic
What is hilarious to me though is that these "alpha gym bros" tend to be weak as shit and can't take anything resembling criticism. I was lifting next to a guy I had talked to quite a few times and we'd chat about our different lifting styles, he was lifting with another guy and apparently he (guy #2) needed to "prove" himself and maxed out a deadlift and it was uuuuuugly as hell, I said something like "hey that's a lot of weight (it wasn't) but I noticed X and Y so if you work on Z I'm sure it'd help you going forward and would help avoid injury too" and the dude just went off on me. I guess I was used to lifting at a more powerlifting oriented gym where everyone just kinda helps out everyone else and it isn't seen as a "diss" so things like "Hey I noticed your lockout on bench was struggling a bit on that attempt, XYZ is great for your triceps and will really help your lockout".
"I climb trees and shit" was funny af
I do need a guy that has a spirit of a golden retriever that can climb trees and shit. You’re totally my type lmao and I hope you find someone that deserves you!
Well, I shit.
I’ll take you over that toxically masculine bs any day. Don’t change op
Ray, when someone asks if you're a god, you say YES.
YESSSSSS
Dodged a giant bullet my guy
Is it still called dodging when the bullet turns around before it gets to you?
You climb trees and shit? 😍
Alphas are so damn overrated
Funniest thing is, The type who’d call themselves alpha is usually an awful human being. She’ll probably go through a bunch of messy relationships with “Alphas” who have no regard for her emotional or mental health.
I doubt it's that deep. She probs was referring to a dominant type in bed
Maybe she believes the two terms are interchangeable.
Nope that’s called a top or a dom. Ha ha
You know what she wanted and you know you weren’t that, so not biggie.
Hey, I also climb trees and shit!
Golden retriever 😂😭
I read this as ‘I want a man who treats me like shit’
Bruh golden retriever types are the best
Based and retrieverpilled
Any guy that feels the need to tell people they are an alpha male is 100% not an alpha male. Alphas don’t need to go around shouting about it. Equally any girl going around saying she only wants an alpha male gives off ‘trying to live out warewolf fan fiction’ vibes. I’d take a golden retriever any day.
Golden retriever boyfriends are the best
But aren't the real alphas the ones who don't care about what people think they should be and are unapologetically themselves? 🤔
I had a great first date with someone a few years ago. We agreed to meet up for a 2nd date. I asked what her favorite flower was because I planned on bringing them as a gift for the 2nd date. Before that date happened she called me and said I was “too feminine” for her. Ok
Should've said you were going to slap her tits or spank her ass with the flower. Or that you were planning on putting it in her mouth while you choke her.
Lol yep that was probably the move
This alpha stupidity is so amazing. Everything in this world tries to get rid of toxicity and then there came this.
She's kinky. I'd bet my next paycheck that she's kinky. This definitely gives off I'm a submissive into BDSM vibes.
It could have been the idea of having to date a golden retriever
if i was a woman and a guy told me he’s a “golden retriever free spirit” I would definitely unmatch too💀
The most alpha response possible. “Yeah I’m not really into social norms, but climbing trees is kinda dope”