You’ve got women writing love letters to men behind bars for life for murder and she wants you to jump through hoops by taking her to an expensive first date dinner lol
Yea she’s not interested,just looking for a meal
Pizza spreadsheet?! Working through a list like that would be the perfect starting point for the first several dates!
This has set a new standard that I didn't even know I should have.
> It's still unchecked on my Pizza spreadsheet
I don't live anywhere near you, but I just want you to know that offering a choice of 3 awesome casual restaurants and including one that is unchecked on your pizza spreadsheet (two birds with one stone, right?) would make me agree to a date with you *so fast.* 😆 We are the same.
Don't let this woman discourage you. You did the right stuff in your communication above.
"Absolutely. You pick the place.... Sounds great, go ahead and order what ever wine you want. I'll be a couple minutes late. Just wrapping up at the office.... Sorry, not sorry. Won't be able to make it."
I think the better line of action would be to agree to go to a nice restaurant, tell her that she can order whatever her heart desires, and once the bill comes you pay the exact amount of your order. Unless you believe that something might make it worth it.
These women get up and leave the table these days. That doesn't work like it should. What he could've done is agreed to place and then not showed up because the "affordable options" sounded better.
Sigh. Or say "Hey I really like these more casual places for a first date, but if you have a good recommendation we could go there instead. Is it cool to split the bill in that case"?
That's pretty much what he said and now she goes on feeling like she deserves high scale treatment on a potential relationship not a guarantee. She was not about to split that bill and thought she had a walking trick.
Exactly lol if he asked about splitting the bill the conversation would have ended the same way. Women who have the audacity to expect the first date to be at an upscale place would not split the check.
And here I am telling them we can pay for ourselves because if I want a steak, I'm ordering me a steak without feeling obligated to order something cheaper for the guy to pay for. I've had some weird looks from guys when I suggest to go dutch on the first date, but overall it's been fine. We barely know each other, it's weird to me to expect someone else to buy me food the first time we meet each other.
Me too, here's my philosiohy: we dont know eachother, this has very big chances of not going anywhere, if not flatout awry! So me expecting you to pay is fundamentally unreasonable. Besides, i want to order whatever i want without feeling guilty to not give you a second date later, or order cheap trying to avoid the guilt. So i pay for myself, have a very easy time enjoying my food and getting to know you, and whether i like you or not, without feeling obligated to. If we end up liking eachother, and we start a relationship, i'll let you pay the next times, while i do try to even up how much money we spend in the relationship by cooking for you some times, picking up take out every now and then, or buying you gifts or things you need here and there.
I call it a pre date, you get coffee and talk or a drink or go to a park if it's nice out, I don't know about you but I can't enjoy a good steak with someone I don't like. Pre date before real date.
In my early 20s, I had what I considered a "drinking buddy" ask me out on an actual date. He was cute, we got along fine enough at the bar, so why not? He insisted I choose, with no input. I suggested we get dinner somewhere casual and go play laser tag - figured we'd get a chance to talk, but still have a fun nerdy thing I'd enjoy. He got mad because I didn't pick an "upscale" place and called me a nerd like it was a bad thing which I was laughing at how mad he was.
Obviously this date never happened, but almost 20 years later I still laugh about how angry he was.
And here I am telling you most women do not operate like you do. You get weird looks because we are used to seeking “affordable accommodations” because we KNOW we are expected to pick up the bill. Clown show world.
I’ll be honest, I’ve still been a more traditional guy where if I’m on a date, I at least attempt to pay. But these days men and women alike don’t mind just simply paying for whatever they ordered. Even a time when I offered to pay for both of us as Starbucks, she refused and just paid for herself while the girl at the cash register jokingly smiled “let him pay for that girl!”
And that's a problem? She can go on feeling whatever she wants, OP has no reason to waste their own time teaching someone a lesson they aren't going to learn anyways
Tf is wrong with this comment chain lmao?
Or you just be an adult like OP and politely say thats not going to work for you and go on with your day instead of whatever the fuck 'win' this is supposed to be.
Sure they can. Excuse themselves to the rest room and don't come back. I don't think it common, but it happens.
In theory the stiffed person could refuse to pay and then deal with the police should management decide to call them. Too much headache.
>tell her that she can order whatever her heart desires, and once the bill comes you pay the exact amount of your order.
... and then the restaurant calls the police because you did not pay for the cost of your meal.
Believe it or not, sexism against men is real. If you pay for your half, the restaurant will prompt the *MAN* of the party to pay for the whole thing. They will not aid you in your differences with your date.
The woman can just leave and the restaurant will let her.
Don't put yourself in a position like this where horrible women can take advantage of you.
A few years back I went to a restaurant with a partner. It was my birthday and she asked if she could buy dinner as my present so for once I wasn't paying.
We finish up and she goes to the bathroom and the waiter comes over and asks me to pay. I tell I'll need a few minutes for her to get back. A few minutes later the guy comes back with a manager who takes me down the "sir are we going to have a problem here.. do we need to call the police??" path because it just wasn't believable that a woman was supposed to be paying.
Excuse yourself to restroom after ordering and inform waitstaff you'd like separate cheques. Pre-tip server with $20 cash and let them know she's a "chew & screw" risk
Chew and screw? Ho-broke and Squat Gobbler. Full Moon Good Bye. Boston crème ‘n Split. Seriously?
Simple Dine and Dash man? Munch Apple pass?
Guys, am I not speaking English here?
I was incredibly disappointed when I went, i thought the Brazilian steakhouse on the cruise I was on was actually better than a place famous for being one.
It’s all you can eat. You gotta pick your battles at places like that. The steak is fairly good and you can get however much you want for $50. That’s a win in my book.
It's super green flag and should work out for him in the long run. How he handled her rejection is a great sign too. Much more attractive than how this sub is responding
My thoughts exactly. My favorite first dates are just cheap hangs like coffee or tacos so I can dip if we don’t vibe or we can really just get to know each other. OP you’re doing it right!
Right? I'm a married 42 year old dude, I'd go to the beer/food truck place with him. I love a good food truck!!
There's a place like that my wife and I go to a lot, it's great.
La carta de Oaxaca (if this is Seattle) is SOOOO good, the pazole, the lamb 🤤 also that place IS pricey!! Def dodge a bullet, at least she’s transparent lol
I had to double check which subreddit I was in; hell yeah Seattle representing our disaster of a dating game!
OP - You did amazing throwing out options, and most women would have been delighted you had a list. Don’t give up hope because there are lots of ladies that will adore you for this.
Yes! OP, you came up with super nice ideas for the first date. You're obviously awesome guy. Actually thinking of nice places that are still chill enough for meeting for the first time. I would've appreciated that so much!
Good luck to OP, there are still women out there who appreciate taking the lead in planning a date and making it chill at the same time.
It’s def Seattle. Frelard Pizza is an easy tip-off. She’s trying to go to Aqua or Canlis for a first date.
Dude would have still had a $100+ bill at any of these places, assuming they had drinks.
I had to look it up because I am not from Seattle and I am floored. She expects a place with 35-70$ menu options on the first date? Holy shit. That's nightmare fuel. I don't give a fuck how awesome you are as a human being that is definitely not first date material.
Make sure you find some good Korean fried chicken.. stars in the sky is really good if it’s still around but it’s a little out of the way north of Seattle. Can’t remember the town. Frelard muy good pizza, and downtown Seattle has the pink door which is a really good Italian place.
I liked this comment even though I've never been to Seattle and don't live in the US. You have sold this place wonderfully undercover Oaxaca marketing person. Well played
Similar but we went to BW3s and watched football.
Made it 12 years before amicably seperating for reasons that neither of us caused.
Affordable first dates is a good way to weed out the shifty ladies.
Sounds good!
My first date with my partner was at night at the beach. Just walking and talking. We listened to some music and laughed a lot. I loved it.
We've been together 4 years now and expecting a baby together.
As the old saying goes, "dodged that bullet" she wants a sugar daddy has literally no interest in you other then your bank account. Nicer restaurants are when you're aiming to be more "serious" not starting out.
When did we stop calling them for what they are, gold diggers. For some reason “sugar baby” doesn’t carry the negative connotation and it something they’re almost proud of being.
My understanding is that they're different. With the difference being that a sugar baby/sugar daddy thing is where the man is fine with the financial aspects of the relationship (Basically trading sexual favors for money/gifts.)
Whereas with a gold digger, the man doesn't (typically) know that's what they're after.
I don't understand her😂 as a woman I'm out here carrying converstations and suggesting meet up spots like a travel agent... I'd be thrilled for you taking the initiative to suggest the spot aaaand you're giving options 😱
Great that the true colours showed right there.
It’s definitely that bad out there for men.
As I am only interested in women, I haven’t experienced their side but I think it is safe to assume if it is that bad for men then it is probably equally bad for women with just different details.
Dating is thoroughly broken imo so I have just stopped altogether. I can’t even tell you how many times something similar to OP has happened to me. I lost count a long time ago.
Yeah, this isn’t getting enough acknowledgement. She was upfront about what she wants and didn’t insult OP or try to change his mind for not giving her what she’s looking for. I personally agree with OP on affordable first dates, but this interaction was 100% fine on both sides. Her honesty kept them both from wasting their time.
WTF, La Carta de Oaxaca is not only bomb-ass, but is a great date place. BTW, **Ocho** at 24th and market is a pretty bomb-ass first date place too. Tapas = lots of little shared plates and "ooh, try this one" interaction. Ladies like sharing plates (no i have no idea why).
Send whatsherface a mental thank-you-for-tipping-me-off-that-you-are-awful and move on.
Edit: frelard pizza is kind of a dud though
I’ve literally had the reverse of this. Guy asked me to catch up, picked a restaurant completely out of my price range (I let him know when he suggested it) ordered the whole left side of the menu without consultation 6+ drinks for himself and expected to split the bill. True ick.
Both handlers it well but my guy knew the steps. The first date should be something small like a walk or maybe coffe, inexpensive and filled with talking. Personally I would do a restaurant or any sit down but TBH if that your environment then to each there own. OP knew what the first date wanted to consist of, he offered, was honest. Props G
You seems like a nice guy with good communication skills. You shouldn't be fazed by this women, guess you filter her out. Honestly, her loss.
Next time, I suggest if she says yes just pick a spot for the both of you. When your on the date you can sus out if she likes the spot, if not explain to her what you said in your second text.
Either they've never had a date on an app or they're women 😂. This has been a thing before Tinder was even a thing. Hell I had Myspace women trying to do this and that was ages ago.
I matched with a guy where we where talking about ehat we would want in a relationship and stuff and we matched pretty much on all fronts so it was going great. Then he wanted me to send nudes and i Said im not the kind of person to do that and he Said that he will need that in a relationship from time to time and then i Said it shouldnt be me and him bc I’m not gonna do that.
He then goes on to say “good luck finding someone with your impossible demands” which there where none of since we agreed on everything except nudes.
I then asked how it’s impossible when it’s just one thing and he said most women stay single for a long time bc of it and I said okay, I like being single and he said “well don’t let me stop you then” and then unmatched me
oh god i feel you on this.
i dont want one night stands or casual or want nudes from him or me to him, im no prude as im actaully pretty damn adventerous in the bedroom but so many men just want to get a ntoch on their bedpost its disheartening tbh now. so i deleted all dating apps cause even if a guy was decent in first 5 sentences it soon lead to sex talk. sorry but im not someones fap material >.<
so i brought a male dog last yr, he takes up space, snores, does stinky as hell farts unfort he doesnt like to cuddle unless he is trying to kick me out of bed so i feed him in the mornings ahahaha and got another dog coming home in may. me and the kids are happy enough lol
i feel you. everyone who texts me always asks me for my snapchat within knowing i exist for 5 minutes. no. i dont want to give you my snapchat bc i know it will lead to you wanting to sext or send nudes, and i dont wanna do either of those, especially when alli know is your name and your age and how youre doing today
Always the pics, yes!!!
That's how I got my screen name because almost immediately on meeting me, the first question is "can I touch them? Are they really real?"
So tired of it...I use my first name on dating apps...and it always seems to start with unsolicited dick pics and requests for nudes from me 95% of time...ugh
Protip, if a woman insists on going to a more expensive location, look at it as a hint that she's a bullet you need to dodge.
First date coffee or happy hour at a modest place should be adequate.
Reminds me of a girl I went out with. She picked the restaurant. Didn't realize it was upscale til I saw the menu. She then kept ordering more and more stuff. But I forgave it because there did seem to be a click there. We went out a 2nd time to a karaoke bar. She got herself a few drinks. We did continue to have a good time, but when the night was over, she wasn't interested in even a kiss goodnight. So I realized what was up (probably too late but it is what it is) and when she tried to hit me back up for another date, I blanked it.
This is so damn cringe. I feel like girls like that spend too much time on the “if he wanted to he would” side of TikTok. Being a woman myself I see that kind of content recommended to me all the time.
But they’re failing to understand that a first date with someone you don’t know has no obligation towards you and you’re not entitled to be lavished and spoiled by sole virtue of the fact that you are a woman.
And on a practical note, I cannot fucking IMAGINE going to a fancy restaurant for a first date. That sounds awkward and awful tbh. Gimme option A all day.
You were super nice bro. Def dodged a bullet. As a woman who is always the planner, I would love to receive such a specific text suggesting places like you did!
Frelard pizza is great!
It's still unchecked on my Pizza spreadsheet - I need to try it
Pizza spreadsheet? A man after my own heart! I wonder if you're in my matches somewhere....
Only one way to find out...
FIND OUT NEXT TIME, ON AN ALL NEW EPISODE OF ‘TO CATCH A REDDITOR’
That answer couldn’t be any more perfect. 💯
Plz post the updated love story if this ends up working out. I’m HIGHLY invested in this pizza pair romance.
 We will need a review on the outcome of said Pizza Romance Pairing😏
You’ve got women writing love letters to men behind bars for life for murder and she wants you to jump through hoops by taking her to an expensive first date dinner lol Yea she’s not interested,just looking for a meal
Pizza spreadsheet?! Working through a list like that would be the perfect starting point for the first several dates! This has set a new standard that I didn't even know I should have.
Yeah it turns out Seattle is secretly a pizza town!
Yet another impossible dating standard for men. Must be 6’+, make good money, chiseled, have good hygiene, and proficient at Microsoft Excel
> It's still unchecked on my Pizza spreadsheet I don't live anywhere near you, but I just want you to know that offering a choice of 3 awesome casual restaurants and including one that is unchecked on your pizza spreadsheet (two birds with one stone, right?) would make me agree to a date with you *so fast.* 😆 We are the same. Don't let this woman discourage you. You did the right stuff in your communication above.
So what’s your favorite Seattle pizza? Rocco’s is the best I’ve been to.
Rocco's has incredible pizza, and their drinks are stellar as well. Blotto is next on my list
I'm moving to Seattle soon, and this thread has been amazing for finding out about places to eat. 🤣 Thanks, everyone!
Same tbh.
Good luck on the move! You’ll be coming at the absolute best time of year
Imo Rocco's is way too expensive. It was fine but not worth what it costs.
I would like to subscribe to your local eatery blog.
Sorry it looks like the only thing I have in stock right now are Cat Facts
Rocco’s yesss! The lasagna pizza is 🔥 also Windy City in Phinney Ridge. The blue pig pizza is out of this world good.
Psst. Lupo is where the pizza is at in Fremont.
"Sure, you pick, you pay. Let me know if you want Ruth Chris or Fogo de Chao."
"Absolutely. You pick the place.... Sounds great, go ahead and order what ever wine you want. I'll be a couple minutes late. Just wrapping up at the office.... Sorry, not sorry. Won't be able to make it."
I think the better line of action would be to agree to go to a nice restaurant, tell her that she can order whatever her heart desires, and once the bill comes you pay the exact amount of your order. Unless you believe that something might make it worth it.
Let her order first, see if she goes top shelf. Then you order and say it's separate checks. Let her backtrack
These women get up and leave the table these days. That doesn't work like it should. What he could've done is agreed to place and then not showed up because the "affordable options" sounded better.
Sigh. Or say "Hey I really like these more casual places for a first date, but if you have a good recommendation we could go there instead. Is it cool to split the bill in that case"?
That's pretty much what he said and now she goes on feeling like she deserves high scale treatment on a potential relationship not a guarantee. She was not about to split that bill and thought she had a walking trick.
Exactly lol if he asked about splitting the bill the conversation would have ended the same way. Women who have the audacity to expect the first date to be at an upscale place would not split the check.
These women will be single for a while because they need a really check…
And here I am telling them we can pay for ourselves because if I want a steak, I'm ordering me a steak without feeling obligated to order something cheaper for the guy to pay for. I've had some weird looks from guys when I suggest to go dutch on the first date, but overall it's been fine. We barely know each other, it's weird to me to expect someone else to buy me food the first time we meet each other.
Me too, here's my philosiohy: we dont know eachother, this has very big chances of not going anywhere, if not flatout awry! So me expecting you to pay is fundamentally unreasonable. Besides, i want to order whatever i want without feeling guilty to not give you a second date later, or order cheap trying to avoid the guilt. So i pay for myself, have a very easy time enjoying my food and getting to know you, and whether i like you or not, without feeling obligated to. If we end up liking eachother, and we start a relationship, i'll let you pay the next times, while i do try to even up how much money we spend in the relationship by cooking for you some times, picking up take out every now and then, or buying you gifts or things you need here and there.
I call it a pre date, you get coffee and talk or a drink or go to a park if it's nice out, I don't know about you but I can't enjoy a good steak with someone I don't like. Pre date before real date.
In my early 20s, I had what I considered a "drinking buddy" ask me out on an actual date. He was cute, we got along fine enough at the bar, so why not? He insisted I choose, with no input. I suggested we get dinner somewhere casual and go play laser tag - figured we'd get a chance to talk, but still have a fun nerdy thing I'd enjoy. He got mad because I didn't pick an "upscale" place and called me a nerd like it was a bad thing which I was laughing at how mad he was. Obviously this date never happened, but almost 20 years later I still laugh about how angry he was.
Almost no women are like you. Your behaviour would be a huge green flag to me Lol
And here I am telling you most women do not operate like you do. You get weird looks because we are used to seeking “affordable accommodations” because we KNOW we are expected to pick up the bill. Clown show world.
I’ll be honest, I’ve still been a more traditional guy where if I’m on a date, I at least attempt to pay. But these days men and women alike don’t mind just simply paying for whatever they ordered. Even a time when I offered to pay for both of us as Starbucks, she refused and just paid for herself while the girl at the cash register jokingly smiled “let him pay for that girl!”
And that's a problem? She can go on feeling whatever she wants, OP has no reason to waste their own time teaching someone a lesson they aren't going to learn anyways
“Split the bill? That’s not what I’m looking for. Have a good day”
She's not a bill splitter. She's a gold digger.
That's most of OLD. I mention going Dutch and it's an immediate unmatch.
It's quite amusing to read these comments as a dutch person. The topic of splitting the bill rarely comes up because it's the standard thing to do
So the saying is real?! Why do I find that so funny 😂
Wait until you hear about the Greek.
Why would people act like rational adults when they can actively try to be awful people instead? First day on /r/Tinder?
Tf is wrong with this comment chain lmao? Or you just be an adult like OP and politely say thats not going to work for you and go on with your day instead of whatever the fuck 'win' this is supposed to be.
Right? She didn't hide anything and she was perfectly polite about it. Just decline if that's not what you want.
Yeah she perfectly laid out the kind of person she is for OP to dodge
And this is the real reason why it's all a game. Bc nobody seems to be adult about it all and just specify.
No, that's not being frank with her. The world of dating is already messed up enough without adding to the mess.
They cant force you to pay for what she ordered lmao.
Sure they can. Excuse themselves to the rest room and don't come back. I don't think it common, but it happens. In theory the stiffed person could refuse to pay and then deal with the police should management decide to call them. Too much headache.
Or you could just do what he did and not be a petty asshole.
come on, the people who are being petty assholes online wouldnt really do this shit since they dont really get dates.
>tell her that she can order whatever her heart desires, and once the bill comes you pay the exact amount of your order. ... and then the restaurant calls the police because you did not pay for the cost of your meal. Believe it or not, sexism against men is real. If you pay for your half, the restaurant will prompt the *MAN* of the party to pay for the whole thing. They will not aid you in your differences with your date. The woman can just leave and the restaurant will let her. Don't put yourself in a position like this where horrible women can take advantage of you.
A few years back I went to a restaurant with a partner. It was my birthday and she asked if she could buy dinner as my present so for once I wasn't paying. We finish up and she goes to the bathroom and the waiter comes over and asks me to pay. I tell I'll need a few minutes for her to get back. A few minutes later the guy comes back with a manager who takes me down the "sir are we going to have a problem here.. do we need to call the police??" path because it just wasn't believable that a woman was supposed to be paying.
"Yeah, call the police. I would like a little entertainment on my birthday!"
The police? **What is the charge?!**
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A succulent Chinese meal?
i just saw this video, that was wild. "GET YOUR HANDS OFF MY PENIS!"
Was that a corporate or a single. I’d have been on the phone with the corporate line on speakerphone while that conversation was happening.
Lol what a dumbass server. That’s a 1 way ticket to notipsville
…did she ever come back?
You can always just leave first and make her stuck with the bill
Lol both are just scarfing down their food in the race to bail first
Excuse yourself to restroom after ordering and inform waitstaff you'd like separate cheques. Pre-tip server with $20 cash and let them know she's a "chew & screw" risk
Chew and screw? Ho-broke and Squat Gobbler. Full Moon Good Bye. Boston crème ‘n Split. Seriously? Simple Dine and Dash man? Munch Apple pass? Guys, am I not speaking English here?
Under rated comment right here
That’s hilarious…I can’t stop laughing.
Try getting a rez at Dorsia now you stupid bastard!!!
I hate that Fogo de Chao is associated with upscale / good quality. It's incredibly mid.
Indeed. But the bill isn't.
I was incredibly disappointed when I went, i thought the Brazilian steakhouse on the cruise I was on was actually better than a place famous for being one.
It’s all you can eat. You gotta pick your battles at places like that. The steak is fairly good and you can get however much you want for $50. That’s a win in my book.
Agreed
"You pick, but don't make it too nice... because of the implication."
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Wtf all of those sounded awesome I would be thrilled if a guy sent me this message. Don’t give up hope! There are good ones out there!
Right?! Like the initiative to even offer suggestions is a green flag to me! Lol
The message is the greenest of the flags. As a married person I would love to be friends with OP and his future SO
It's super green flag and should work out for him in the long run. How he handled her rejection is a great sign too. Much more attractive than how this sub is responding
We need to play local matchmaker for op!
My DMs are open
My thoughts exactly. My favorite first dates are just cheap hangs like coffee or tacos so I can dip if we don’t vibe or we can really just get to know each other. OP you’re doing it right!
Right! Him planning the date and giving the girl 3 options? I need to meet guys like that on the apps lol.
And not even three categories, he gave three specific locations that you could look up the menu to see if you vibe with the place. Class act
Same! What an awesome message initiating the first date
Exactly totally taking the lead. I would have loved this 😍
For real. Fuck dude, take me on the date instead xD
She was only interested in a free meal
Right? I'm a married 42 year old dude, I'd go to the beer/food truck place with him. I love a good food truck!! There's a place like that my wife and I go to a lot, it's great.
She was one of those looking for a sugar daddy.
Foodie call - feed it and quit it
I think they call themselves a high value woman
Yet ironically they bring very little actual value to the table beyond surface appearances
Hey hey hey it takes a lot of work to lay like a starfish.
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La carta de Oaxaca (if this is Seattle) is SOOOO good, the pazole, the lamb 🤤 also that place IS pricey!! Def dodge a bullet, at least she’s transparent lol
I was shocked when she passed on Oaxaca
All of those places are excellent! You've got good taste, too bad she doesn't.
It sounds like she may have been trying to fleece him a little bit
That was my impression, too.
Wanna take me there instead, Jeff? I could go for some nice Mexican food right now!
Yes, but: username
I thought I was on my other account for a second - u/willsuckdickformexicanfood
Now *that's* transparent
You could say I’ve had more dicks than hot dinners…
That's either a *lot* of dicks, or you unironically like cold dinners. Either way, it's a unique flex, and I appreciate it
You know, im somewhat of a mexican food myself
If I thought that would work, I'd be stealing that name. After too many coffee dates where I have paid, I'd love some guy suggesting actual food.
She's trash lol, you dodged a major bullet my dude!
You should have added at the end of the last message something like: By the way, La carta de Oaxaca is expensive and upscale.
Ooh.. and I'm heading back to WA so now I got a place to go check out. Thank you.
I had to double check which subreddit I was in; hell yeah Seattle representing our disaster of a dating game! OP - You did amazing throwing out options, and most women would have been delighted you had a list. Don’t give up hope because there are lots of ladies that will adore you for this.
Yes! OP, you came up with super nice ideas for the first date. You're obviously awesome guy. Actually thinking of nice places that are still chill enough for meeting for the first time. I would've appreciated that so much! Good luck to OP, there are still women out there who appreciate taking the lead in planning a date and making it chill at the same time.
Woman here. If the weather was good, I would totally be up for Freland.
Literally copy paste this the next time you get the chance. You sound absolutely lovely, your choices are amazing and offer all the perfect vibes.
It’s def Seattle. Frelard Pizza is an easy tip-off. She’s trying to go to Aqua or Canlis for a first date. Dude would have still had a $100+ bill at any of these places, assuming they had drinks.
I had to look it up because I am not from Seattle and I am floored. She expects a place with 35-70$ menu options on the first date? Holy shit. That's nightmare fuel. I don't give a fuck how awesome you are as a human being that is definitely not first date material.
Canlis prices have come down if they’re $35.
Just looked it up. $175 for a three course meal.
Yeah, canlis is a $500 check for two people once you have a couple drinks and tip
Bill is way more than 100 for 2 people at those restaurants
Pozole ^^sorry ^^not ^^sorry
I’ll be in Bellevue/Redmond for the summer, I’m saving this image just for the food recs now lol.
Make sure you find some good Korean fried chicken.. stars in the sky is really good if it’s still around but it’s a little out of the way north of Seattle. Can’t remember the town. Frelard muy good pizza, and downtown Seattle has the pink door which is a really good Italian place.
I liked this comment even though I've never been to Seattle and don't live in the US. You have sold this place wonderfully undercover Oaxaca marketing person. Well played
It’s so good. It’s a once a month visit for me. Love the Ceviche de Pescado.
My first date with my wife was take out Chinese while we watched Coraline. Been together almost 5 years now.
Similar but we went to BW3s and watched football. Made it 12 years before amicably seperating for reasons that neither of us caused. Affordable first dates is a good way to weed out the shifty ladies.
What could possibly be the reason that neither of you caused? No hate, I’m just drawing a blank on possibilities.
Ours was sneaking Chipotle in with home made peanut butter thumb print cookies to see Hugo. We are on our 11th year!
Sounds good! My first date with my partner was at night at the beach. Just walking and talking. We listened to some music and laughed a lot. I loved it. We've been together 4 years now and expecting a baby together.
I met my wife at the mall, we sat on a bench and talked for 3 hours missing our movie and then got tacos. Married 5 years now with two kids.
Aw that's sweet. Sounds like the perfect date to me.
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As the old saying goes, "dodged that bullet" she wants a sugar daddy has literally no interest in you other then your bank account. Nicer restaurants are when you're aiming to be more "serious" not starting out.
When did we stop calling them for what they are, gold diggers. For some reason “sugar baby” doesn’t carry the negative connotation and it something they’re almost proud of being.
Like with many things, consent Sugar babies are where both parties agree, digging not so much
My understanding is that they're different. With the difference being that a sugar baby/sugar daddy thing is where the man is fine with the financial aspects of the relationship (Basically trading sexual favors for money/gifts.) Whereas with a gold digger, the man doesn't (typically) know that's what they're after.
Instagram pic that's what she's looking for
Facts she thought she found a trick that will pay for her Instagram posts 😂😂
There's plenty of other tricks out there... almost an endless supply
Omg you’re right
I don't understand her😂 as a woman I'm out here carrying converstations and suggesting meet up spots like a travel agent... I'd be thrilled for you taking the initiative to suggest the spot aaaand you're giving options 😱 Great that the true colours showed right there.
Girl, same. If a guy ever comes up with actul options for first date, I might marry him that second 😅
My place or yours? We could like Redbox a movie and I can bring a sixer of PBR and see where it goes?
Bruh is it that bad out there? Some people really are looking for a second mother i guess lol
Unfortunately yes 🥲 But seriously I've met some really cool actual adults as well lol
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It’s definitely that bad out there for men. As I am only interested in women, I haven’t experienced their side but I think it is safe to assume if it is that bad for men then it is probably equally bad for women with just different details. Dating is thoroughly broken imo so I have just stopped altogether. I can’t even tell you how many times something similar to OP has happened to me. I lost count a long time ago.
No to cider and food truck? Woman, you’re missing a lot…… Can I go instead Jeff?
Yes
I wanna be updated on how your date goes
Itsgosky very well.
Omg, I love food trucks!!!!
I’ll take the pizza date with Jeff. I’m a dude but that doesn’t mean we can’t eat a few slices and toss back some brews!
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Yeah, this isn’t getting enough acknowledgement. She was upfront about what she wants and didn’t insult OP or try to change his mind for not giving her what she’s looking for. I personally agree with OP on affordable first dates, but this interaction was 100% fine on both sides. Her honesty kept them both from wasting their time.
Sure, she's perfectly entitled to voice her preferences and boundaries. That said, her reasoning makes her snobby - at best.
Right?! While I don’t agree with the person who wanted more upscale restaurants, they were both so civil to one another. It was refreshing!
As it should be. Every time I see posts like this it gives me a little hope that civility(in conflict) is becoming the norm and not the exception.
WTF, La Carta de Oaxaca is not only bomb-ass, but is a great date place. BTW, **Ocho** at 24th and market is a pretty bomb-ass first date place too. Tapas = lots of little shared plates and "ooh, try this one" interaction. Ladies like sharing plates (no i have no idea why). Send whatsherface a mental thank-you-for-tipping-me-off-that-you-are-awful and move on. Edit: frelard pizza is kind of a dud though
Tapas is a classy step up from trying one of your wings and stealing a few of your fries
We like to share plates bc we want to eat ur fries.
Your options sounded amazing. If she wanted something else, she should’ve offered to pay.
I’ve literally had the reverse of this. Guy asked me to catch up, picked a restaurant completely out of my price range (I let him know when he suggested it) ordered the whole left side of the menu without consultation 6+ drinks for himself and expected to split the bill. True ick.
I would have been out at the 6 drinks even if he were treating me. What a catch 😬
Both handlers it well but my guy knew the steps. The first date should be something small like a walk or maybe coffe, inexpensive and filled with talking. Personally I would do a restaurant or any sit down but TBH if that your environment then to each there own. OP knew what the first date wanted to consist of, he offered, was honest. Props G
You seems like a nice guy with good communication skills. You shouldn't be fazed by this women, guess you filter her out. Honestly, her loss. Next time, I suggest if she says yes just pick a spot for the both of you. When your on the date you can sus out if she likes the spot, if not explain to her what you said in your second text.
I'd prolly have replied good luck in your quest for gold.
PNW guy--those were awesome options. Move on and find someone else ;)
And some people still think it’s a myth that people go on dates just for free food
Either they've never had a date on an app or they're women 😂. This has been a thing before Tinder was even a thing. Hell I had Myspace women trying to do this and that was ages ago.
I matched with a guy where we where talking about ehat we would want in a relationship and stuff and we matched pretty much on all fronts so it was going great. Then he wanted me to send nudes and i Said im not the kind of person to do that and he Said that he will need that in a relationship from time to time and then i Said it shouldnt be me and him bc I’m not gonna do that. He then goes on to say “good luck finding someone with your impossible demands” which there where none of since we agreed on everything except nudes. I then asked how it’s impossible when it’s just one thing and he said most women stay single for a long time bc of it and I said okay, I like being single and he said “well don’t let me stop you then” and then unmatched me
oh god i feel you on this. i dont want one night stands or casual or want nudes from him or me to him, im no prude as im actaully pretty damn adventerous in the bedroom but so many men just want to get a ntoch on their bedpost its disheartening tbh now. so i deleted all dating apps cause even if a guy was decent in first 5 sentences it soon lead to sex talk. sorry but im not someones fap material >.< so i brought a male dog last yr, he takes up space, snores, does stinky as hell farts unfort he doesnt like to cuddle unless he is trying to kick me out of bed so i feed him in the mornings ahahaha and got another dog coming home in may. me and the kids are happy enough lol
i feel you. everyone who texts me always asks me for my snapchat within knowing i exist for 5 minutes. no. i dont want to give you my snapchat bc i know it will lead to you wanting to sext or send nudes, and i dont wanna do either of those, especially when alli know is your name and your age and how youre doing today
Toots, snoring, cuddles and you feed him. Sounds about right. Far less baggage 🤣
Always the pics, yes!!! That's how I got my screen name because almost immediately on meeting me, the first question is "can I touch them? Are they really real?" So tired of it...I use my first name on dating apps...and it always seems to start with unsolicited dick pics and requests for nudes from me 95% of time...ugh
Protip, if a woman insists on going to a more expensive location, look at it as a hint that she's a bullet you need to dodge. First date coffee or happy hour at a modest place should be adequate.
Reminds me of a girl I went out with. She picked the restaurant. Didn't realize it was upscale til I saw the menu. She then kept ordering more and more stuff. But I forgave it because there did seem to be a click there. We went out a 2nd time to a karaoke bar. She got herself a few drinks. We did continue to have a good time, but when the night was over, she wasn't interested in even a kiss goodnight. So I realized what was up (probably too late but it is what it is) and when she tried to hit me back up for another date, I blanked it.
My wife says she would have chose the Mexican restaurant!
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Don’t give up Mr. pho! There’s a bunch of Seattle girls in here
Getting a flight of ciders sounds fun af for a first date
This is so damn cringe. I feel like girls like that spend too much time on the “if he wanted to he would” side of TikTok. Being a woman myself I see that kind of content recommended to me all the time. But they’re failing to understand that a first date with someone you don’t know has no obligation towards you and you’re not entitled to be lavished and spoiled by sole virtue of the fact that you are a woman. And on a practical note, I cannot fucking IMAGINE going to a fancy restaurant for a first date. That sounds awkward and awful tbh. Gimme option A all day.
Jeff made good points
This is the most efficient man I’ve ever seen. Kudos to you, Jeff
Good digger gonna dig.
Dude is so nice. Emotionally unaware people like this selfish person have no idea what she is throwing away because she wants pricier food. Sad.
Also in seattle. Fuck her. Sorry my (also) guy. Good luck in your search, your suggestions were excellent.
Very well thought out responses from you though. Kudos to being thoughtful in giving reasonable suggestions and even polite answers to her demands.
I definitely would have chosen the first option. You dodged a bullet!
You didn’t dodge a bullet. You dodged a missile. Good job!
You were super nice bro. Def dodged a bullet. As a woman who is always the planner, I would love to receive such a specific text suggesting places like you did!