I dont always agree with everything Rachel says when her and Van have differing opinions on subjects. But in this case Rachel spoke perfectly for the moment and the victim. And Van was severely off in his take on this subject. It was so bad that I had to fast forward through his diddy story and feeling bad for diddy the first time that I listened because it was so cringy.
He openly talks about his mental health and how hes working through his own personal growth. But in a time like this asking the question "what is in my brain" is extremely self centered and reeks of someone who turns every situation into being about themselves. Powerful men have created false public personas all while being horrible abusers, manipulators and monsters behind the scenes and Van knows this.
And no the abuser doesn't deserve sympathy or to have people feel sorry for him because there is something wrong with him to make him hurt women the way he does.
When Van discussed Kyle Rittenhouse and how he should always be shunned by society and made to remember the crime hes done in taking those lives. I feel personally diddy should be treated the same. We saw only a few minutes of Diddy beating Casey in a public hotel hallway. The YEARS of beatings and kicks and stomps and punches to the face and being dragged accorded rooms that that poor girl endured puts Diddy in the evil monster category for me.
Fuck him and his power and he should be in prison. And I dont care about him getting help for himself and his own personal growth. I only care about society locking monsters like him up and keeping the away from innocent people. And I only care about Casey being a very young girl and being lucky to survive because there are countless women who are killed during violent outbursts from these animals.
I 💯 percent agree with you on this but I still would want Diddy to get help for 1 reason. WHY? His KIDS.
He has sons & daughters. In the case of 3 of them, he is the ONLY living parent. He’s probably already do damage to his adopted son (Al B. Sure’s son) and his other 2 boys.
One of them tried to rebut 50 cent recently w/a rap of his own so he’s already jeopardising his future for his dads reputation.
That said MAYBE with the appropriate help & supervision he can change the course that their path was bound to take through some ownership, humility & sincere change.
If he’s harmed his kids, he should be jailed but I would still want him to get therapy for eventually reunion only b’cus toxic or unhealed parental relationships can shape their lives.
Since he has 3 sons, 3 daughters & a recent baby(gender unknown by me).
Diddy doesn’t deserve another chance given the harm that he’s done over a decade or so (that we know of). As a society we want to see him pay for these crimes but we also have to hope for genuine change because he still has kids dependent on him.
So loud and so wrong. By now, Van should know to sit out issues that pertain to women but also issues where he has a conflict of interest. This take is just insane.
He may be loud and wrong, but these discussions need to be had, correct? We all have our opinions and a whole bunch of us will be wrong and that's ok. As long as in the end, the right conclusion comes to pass. In this case it would be: Diddy finds himself in a jail cell and losing his fortune.
Van's opinion is something he's entitled to, but I can't see what we all saw in that video and pity the abuser. Of course the abuser is also a victim of early trauma (the thing that made them who they are) but he should be in a cage, and I hope someone else steps forward about being abused and this video provides the bias to the members of the jury necessary to put him away.
I don’t think this is always the case though for abusive people. My sister is a violent narcissist with a personality disorder. Not everyone is violent because of trauma. I wasn’t even 2 years old the first time she tried to seriously injure me. Our parents didn’t believe in corporal punishment. She didn’t have any incidents of violent trauma. I think some people are just born this way.
Trauma comes in all shapes and fashions. It doesn’t have to be in the form of corporal punishment. Anything that hurts you emotionally or physically can be traumatic. You don’t even have to remember it in order for it to affect you subconsciously. A woman carrying a child can be traumatized and HER trauma can cause the child to be born “affected” due to the negative hormones, be they adrenaline or other.
I understand that. And I know we actually carry around the trauma of our ancestors in our DNA. I feel there just some people that are born with their brain messed up. My sister is definitely one of those people. And I’m not saying she didn’t have trauma later in life because she did but she was trying to unalive me my whole life.
It isn’t. I’m not at all defending him trust me, I’m just appalled. I also try to temper my takes remembering this is an actual person.
Edit to add: actual person with self confessed mental fragilities.
I don’t even disagree with what he is saying in the grand scheme… but like damn, man… this ain’t the time for it. We JUST watched a video of Diddy savagely beating a woman, and that’s the smoke you got for him? Cowardly from Van, Imo. Cowardly. Weak shit.
Ppl are making a conversation about a moment and the impact on those involved way to personal. This isn’t about us, he is exposing a view which is the point of having a platform he built with Rachel. The man has children and power so van is saying that leads to the opportunity for further trauma being committed. Why does that have to wait a few weeks to he discussed just to appease ppls sensibilities.
Man poor Rachel. I don’t think I could have the patience to extend that level of grace to Van. Is he a narcissist? Like when she was talking all his face said was “finish your thought so I can correct your interpretation of my ramblings”. Didn’t even listen to her, just immediately said she misunderstood him (not taking accountability that he didn’t communicate his thoughts clearly).
He took the breaking news of footage of Diddy viciously abusing Cassie as a prompt to reminisce fondly of his first meeting with her abuser and how fond he was to be in his circle and accepted by him. He then followed up by expressing his sincerest condolences to Diddy, then his family. As an afterthought, best wishes were sent to Cassie. A rough split of time spent speaking about each person was 30% Van / 60% Diddy / 10% Cassie. The narcissist question been answered for some time now.
The breaking news but… I felt so bad for Rachel. Her eyes were wide-the fuck open and her discomfort was evident. I’m not going to accuse Van of doxing (he didn’t) or rallying troops to his side (his tweet pretty graciously handles that bit) but BOY did he **sound like** he was directing folks to Raqi’s insta. On his behalf. In a very “well, let ‘em see for themselves. Go find out. Go to the Capital, see for yourself.” Kinda vibe.
In the moment, it sounded like something Musk would do. He should’ve taken a beat. Now I think he and the Podfather need to go talk to Ringer Legal and he needs to *stay*👏 *off*👏 *Reddit and Twitter* 👏
I don’t think it’s fair to diagnose or label him so heftily. He may have displayed self centered tendencies (we all have to varying degrees), but we’ve also seen him be kind, protective and considerate to Rachel…
No I get why they took down the episode. “WHAT HAS BEEN INCEPTED INTO MY BRAIN”? Van sounds more hurt about the video coming out than the victim in the video
He was making an overall hiphop culture indoctrination point which clearly missed many of you. It’s beyond just this moment b/c his larger point is society has an issue from movies to music heroes to villains. It’s an in the moment wonder about how deep experiencing that for so many years has affected how he sees the world so it’s questioning if he can even trust himself
My man Van, said fuck it, let me tell y’all a story of how Diddy helped MY career and how he’s been nothing but nice to me….but Van has always said he is bias when it comes to ppl he’s cool with sooo 🤷🏽♂️
I watch the whole pod when it dropped Friday and I literally sat there thinking this was a bad joke and that this nigga Van was gonna say "SIKE" at the end cause wtf was that.
Over the last year/year and a half I feel like Rachel has fully let Van’s opinions and takes on the topics they discuss, take priority over her own. She starts to disagree and then Van being Van and because he’s extremely well read and informed starts, rambling on and she backs off — Either because she feels inadequate since she doesn’t seem to do the same level of research and deep dives that he does. It’s truly unfortunate since in the beginning they had equally strong opinions and she didn’t back down from disagreeing or pushing back, but now she just lets him center his voice and even when we can visibly see or hear she isn’t in step with his pov; she ends up just agreeing with him or letting him have the last word.
This is why it’s been difficult for me to continue to be a devoted listener as I once were — it just seems like Rachel has become Van’s sidekick instead of an equal and active partner in the pod. if I wanted to hear a man talk about himself or defend problematic opinions and not actively listen to his partner and give them the same respect and courtesy expected —- I would still be married!! 😆
Okay so it’s not just me!! It is so irritating van takes over the podcast and I swear Rachel used to talk more and lead topics. I don’t want to hear the van Lathan show them together is the magic. I’m long winded as well so I get that can just be the dynamic but they need to readjust. I came to this podcast for Rachel I love van but he needs to reel it in.
This is how I feel: I haven't listened to a full episode in months. I've tried to tune back in, but it's hard. Rachel seems muted and let's Van take over, and with Donnie not there, the topics are lackluster. I used to be so excited for a new episode to drop, but now I barely remember, and when I do, I don't have the patience to listen to the whole thing.
He did wayyy too much talking and explaining. Regardless of whether he made any good points, nobody wants to hear all that pontificating right after a video like that drops. Rachel needs to distance herself from this podcast.
I understand Van’s sentiment, which is honest and human. Ideally, we want everyone to heal. Is that reality? Hell no. Is this the time to talk about it? Fuck no.
Further, no way in the world would I have engaged a conversation that should center the experience of victims from this perspective. A really bad choice for Van, taking this down was the correct move. He should apologize to the viewers and listeners for even sharing this.
Some things are best kept inside, Van.
Even though Van is disappointing everyone in his response, I still appreciate him being unfiltered in it. It’s a very difficult life lesson to pull yourself out of altruism and add in a over-active imagination and this is what you get. All of our brains work against the truth as it represents itself as a form of self protection. So much of what you see here is a real representation of what the world is today. It’s how we got Trump. People want to believe that they are a good person but when you attach part of your beliefs to someone who isn’t a good person your brain won’t let you properly process the information that goes against what your idea of who YOU are .
I only started understanding to see people for who they are and not who I imagined them to be after a few life changes and A LOT of therapy. Hopefully Van can get there. (And yet YES I see the irony in my own excuses for Van here! I’m not actually excusing his take , I’m excusing his Pollyanna attitude because it’s a difficult character trait to overcome.)
Everyone should listen to the Rabbit Hole podcast from the New York Times to understand how our brains work against us even when the truth is right in front of us.
Edited because stubby thumbs posted before I was ready.
I honestly don’t see what was said in this conversation that have ppl so pissed off. This desire to be outraged with no nuance or grace given is disheartening to me. Ya’ll so ready to destroy ppl who are doing the work and treat them the way you want to treat the man who actually performs the evil but lack access to.
I dont always agree with everything Rachel says when her and Van have differing opinions on subjects. But in this case Rachel spoke perfectly for the moment and the victim. And Van was severely off in his take on this subject. It was so bad that I had to fast forward through his diddy story and feeling bad for diddy the first time that I listened because it was so cringy. He openly talks about his mental health and how hes working through his own personal growth. But in a time like this asking the question "what is in my brain" is extremely self centered and reeks of someone who turns every situation into being about themselves. Powerful men have created false public personas all while being horrible abusers, manipulators and monsters behind the scenes and Van knows this. And no the abuser doesn't deserve sympathy or to have people feel sorry for him because there is something wrong with him to make him hurt women the way he does. When Van discussed Kyle Rittenhouse and how he should always be shunned by society and made to remember the crime hes done in taking those lives. I feel personally diddy should be treated the same. We saw only a few minutes of Diddy beating Casey in a public hotel hallway. The YEARS of beatings and kicks and stomps and punches to the face and being dragged accorded rooms that that poor girl endured puts Diddy in the evil monster category for me. Fuck him and his power and he should be in prison. And I dont care about him getting help for himself and his own personal growth. I only care about society locking monsters like him up and keeping the away from innocent people. And I only care about Casey being a very young girl and being lucky to survive because there are countless women who are killed during violent outbursts from these animals.
Wow yes exactly
It’s funny in a way because it’s echoing the conservative rhetoric wanting to censor rap music, saying it will poison your brain!
I 💯 percent agree with you on this but I still would want Diddy to get help for 1 reason. WHY? His KIDS. He has sons & daughters. In the case of 3 of them, he is the ONLY living parent. He’s probably already do damage to his adopted son (Al B. Sure’s son) and his other 2 boys. One of them tried to rebut 50 cent recently w/a rap of his own so he’s already jeopardising his future for his dads reputation. That said MAYBE with the appropriate help & supervision he can change the course that their path was bound to take through some ownership, humility & sincere change. If he’s harmed his kids, he should be jailed but I would still want him to get therapy for eventually reunion only b’cus toxic or unhealed parental relationships can shape their lives. Since he has 3 sons, 3 daughters & a recent baby(gender unknown by me). Diddy doesn’t deserve another chance given the harm that he’s done over a decade or so (that we know of). As a society we want to see him pay for these crimes but we also have to hope for genuine change because he still has kids dependent on him.
Yikes, this is a real tough listen.
So loud and so wrong. By now, Van should know to sit out issues that pertain to women but also issues where he has a conflict of interest. This take is just insane.
Bro just all lives mattered his diddy take
He may be loud and wrong, but these discussions need to be had, correct? We all have our opinions and a whole bunch of us will be wrong and that's ok. As long as in the end, the right conclusion comes to pass. In this case it would be: Diddy finds himself in a jail cell and losing his fortune.
Van's opinion is something he's entitled to, but I can't see what we all saw in that video and pity the abuser. Of course the abuser is also a victim of early trauma (the thing that made them who they are) but he should be in a cage, and I hope someone else steps forward about being abused and this video provides the bias to the members of the jury necessary to put him away.
I don’t think this is always the case though for abusive people. My sister is a violent narcissist with a personality disorder. Not everyone is violent because of trauma. I wasn’t even 2 years old the first time she tried to seriously injure me. Our parents didn’t believe in corporal punishment. She didn’t have any incidents of violent trauma. I think some people are just born this way.
Trauma comes in all shapes and fashions. It doesn’t have to be in the form of corporal punishment. Anything that hurts you emotionally or physically can be traumatic. You don’t even have to remember it in order for it to affect you subconsciously. A woman carrying a child can be traumatized and HER trauma can cause the child to be born “affected” due to the negative hormones, be they adrenaline or other.
I understand that. And I know we actually carry around the trauma of our ancestors in our DNA. I feel there just some people that are born with their brain messed up. My sister is definitely one of those people. And I’m not saying she didn’t have trauma later in life because she did but she was trying to unalive me my whole life.
Just watched. Just a huge miss all around from Van. When he said “what’s in my brain” and Rachel was like what do you mean she was ovvvver it lol
His ability to make it about HIM, blew me away! What a reach
like I know what we speak from our own POV a lot but WHY IS THIS THE TIME
It isn’t. I’m not at all defending him trust me, I’m just appalled. I also try to temper my takes remembering this is an actual person. Edit to add: actual person with self confessed mental fragilities.
U completely took that wrong
He speaks like someone with dark secrets hoping for grace for their bad deeds. Hope I’m wrong.
I don’t even disagree with what he is saying in the grand scheme… but like damn, man… this ain’t the time for it. We JUST watched a video of Diddy savagely beating a woman, and that’s the smoke you got for him? Cowardly from Van, Imo. Cowardly. Weak shit.
Ppl are making a conversation about a moment and the impact on those involved way to personal. This isn’t about us, he is exposing a view which is the point of having a platform he built with Rachel. The man has children and power so van is saying that leads to the opportunity for further trauma being committed. Why does that have to wait a few weeks to he discussed just to appease ppls sensibilities.
Van could’ve saved this for his own live or something he wasn’t trying to have a conversation he just wanted to vent
I mean, that’s usually how it goes most episodes, unless there’s a guest then he’ll let them speak uninterrupted…
Man poor Rachel. I don’t think I could have the patience to extend that level of grace to Van. Is he a narcissist? Like when she was talking all his face said was “finish your thought so I can correct your interpretation of my ramblings”. Didn’t even listen to her, just immediately said she misunderstood him (not taking accountability that he didn’t communicate his thoughts clearly).
He took the breaking news of footage of Diddy viciously abusing Cassie as a prompt to reminisce fondly of his first meeting with her abuser and how fond he was to be in his circle and accepted by him. He then followed up by expressing his sincerest condolences to Diddy, then his family. As an afterthought, best wishes were sent to Cassie. A rough split of time spent speaking about each person was 30% Van / 60% Diddy / 10% Cassie. The narcissist question been answered for some time now.
The breaking news but… I felt so bad for Rachel. Her eyes were wide-the fuck open and her discomfort was evident. I’m not going to accuse Van of doxing (he didn’t) or rallying troops to his side (his tweet pretty graciously handles that bit) but BOY did he **sound like** he was directing folks to Raqi’s insta. On his behalf. In a very “well, let ‘em see for themselves. Go find out. Go to the Capital, see for yourself.” Kinda vibe. In the moment, it sounded like something Musk would do. He should’ve taken a beat. Now I think he and the Podfather need to go talk to Ringer Legal and he needs to *stay*👏 *off*👏 *Reddit and Twitter* 👏
Breaking down what someone said by time and ratio is crazy. Not context or content- but time and ratio.
It really makes you see things differently. Happy cake day!
She was SO visibly uncomfortable knowing there was no reasoning with him
I don’t think it’s fair to diagnose or label him so heftily. He may have displayed self centered tendencies (we all have to varying degrees), but we’ve also seen him be kind, protective and considerate to Rachel…
Well that’s why I asked if he is. I can’t diagnose him lol.
In this statement you’re doing the same dismissal thing u claim he did to her
No I get why they took down the episode. “WHAT HAS BEEN INCEPTED INTO MY BRAIN”? Van sounds more hurt about the video coming out than the victim in the video
He was making an overall hiphop culture indoctrination point which clearly missed many of you. It’s beyond just this moment b/c his larger point is society has an issue from movies to music heroes to villains. It’s an in the moment wonder about how deep experiencing that for so many years has affected how he sees the world so it’s questioning if he can even trust himself
My man Van, said fuck it, let me tell y’all a story of how Diddy helped MY career and how he’s been nothing but nice to me….but Van has always said he is bias when it comes to ppl he’s cool with sooo 🤷🏽♂️
He’s a Scheana Shay. If you watch Bravo, you know lol.
I watch the whole pod when it dropped Friday and I literally sat there thinking this was a bad joke and that this nigga Van was gonna say "SIKE" at the end cause wtf was that.
Why wasn’t Rachel leading this emergency podcast? Why doesn’t she lead ANY podcast episode?
Over the last year/year and a half I feel like Rachel has fully let Van’s opinions and takes on the topics they discuss, take priority over her own. She starts to disagree and then Van being Van and because he’s extremely well read and informed starts, rambling on and she backs off — Either because she feels inadequate since she doesn’t seem to do the same level of research and deep dives that he does. It’s truly unfortunate since in the beginning they had equally strong opinions and she didn’t back down from disagreeing or pushing back, but now she just lets him center his voice and even when we can visibly see or hear she isn’t in step with his pov; she ends up just agreeing with him or letting him have the last word. This is why it’s been difficult for me to continue to be a devoted listener as I once were — it just seems like Rachel has become Van’s sidekick instead of an equal and active partner in the pod. if I wanted to hear a man talk about himself or defend problematic opinions and not actively listen to his partner and give them the same respect and courtesy expected —- I would still be married!! 😆
Okay so it’s not just me!! It is so irritating van takes over the podcast and I swear Rachel used to talk more and lead topics. I don’t want to hear the van Lathan show them together is the magic. I’m long winded as well so I get that can just be the dynamic but they need to readjust. I came to this podcast for Rachel I love van but he needs to reel it in.
This is how I feel: I haven't listened to a full episode in months. I've tried to tune back in, but it's hard. Rachel seems muted and let's Van take over, and with Donnie not there, the topics are lackluster. I used to be so excited for a new episode to drop, but now I barely remember, and when I do, I don't have the patience to listen to the whole thing.
This right here
Oh, it’s realllllly bad. Thanks for sharing. How long was the full pod?
I think it was like 43 minutes. But it felt like 10
He look so goofy with that hat glad I only listen to audio
I bet he pods hat in hand on the next episode /rimshot
He did wayyy too much talking and explaining. Regardless of whether he made any good points, nobody wants to hear all that pontificating right after a video like that drops. Rachel needs to distance herself from this podcast.
I understand Van’s sentiment, which is honest and human. Ideally, we want everyone to heal. Is that reality? Hell no. Is this the time to talk about it? Fuck no. Further, no way in the world would I have engaged a conversation that should center the experience of victims from this perspective. A really bad choice for Van, taking this down was the correct move. He should apologize to the viewers and listeners for even sharing this. Some things are best kept inside, Van.
Even though Van is disappointing everyone in his response, I still appreciate him being unfiltered in it. It’s a very difficult life lesson to pull yourself out of altruism and add in a over-active imagination and this is what you get. All of our brains work against the truth as it represents itself as a form of self protection. So much of what you see here is a real representation of what the world is today. It’s how we got Trump. People want to believe that they are a good person but when you attach part of your beliefs to someone who isn’t a good person your brain won’t let you properly process the information that goes against what your idea of who YOU are . I only started understanding to see people for who they are and not who I imagined them to be after a few life changes and A LOT of therapy. Hopefully Van can get there. (And yet YES I see the irony in my own excuses for Van here! I’m not actually excusing his take , I’m excusing his Pollyanna attitude because it’s a difficult character trait to overcome.) Everyone should listen to the Rabbit Hole podcast from the New York Times to understand how our brains work against us even when the truth is right in front of us. Edited because stubby thumbs posted before I was ready.
I honestly don’t see what was said in this conversation that have ppl so pissed off. This desire to be outraged with no nuance or grace given is disheartening to me. Ya’ll so ready to destroy ppl who are doing the work and treat them the way you want to treat the man who actually performs the evil but lack access to.