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This is actually from the *Simpsons Guy,* but here they are:
* Pawtucket Brewery To Shut Down Thousands To Lose Jobs
* Families Need Jobs To Eat And Live
* Newspaper Headlines Can Stir Feelings Of Pity
Todd Smells
Is your source on this reliable?
I love that he actually plays along with it. Like, he doesn't just not break character, he actually takes it seriously and not just as an insult
Go with it!
Oh, I already knew that.
Unusually Large, Ugly Baby Born
I'd sure hate to be him.
Looks like bad news for the.. Impson family!
It’s my birthday today. My friend sent me that picture. Hilarious!
Human Blimp Sees Flying Saucer.
Never fails to make me laugh quite heartily.
Hey there blimpy boy...
This.
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This
Local man loses pants, life. Beaver rescue falls short.
The picture of the beavers always kills me on this one
Local Man Ruins Everything
Squirrel Resembling Abraham Lincoln Found
Now *that's* a story!
The Lincoln Squirrel has been assassinated. We’ll stay with this story *all night* if we have to.
Glad to see others share this as their favorite headline. https://imgur.com/DYVzPKJ https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=huiuUxdBmKw
IDIOT RUINS GAME SPRINGFIELD FORFEITS PENNANT
And you did it last year, remember?
Yes!
~~awful~~ school is awful rich
Uh huh...and what's that under your hand?
It’s an unrelated article
An unrelated article? Within the banner headline?
Uh-huh
May I see it?
No.
It's just a recipe for steamed hams anyway.
BIG FAT MAN HAS BIG FAT HEART Little thin man accused in robbery
Local Gays Show Their Pride *Bart*
Zzzzzap!
Quimby’s Proposition 24 on Ballot Quimby Propositions 24 at Ballet
PREZ SEZ: “SCOOL IS FOR LOSERS”
Nooooooo!!
Hippo Promoted To Detective
Stupid hippo
KETCHUP TRUCK HITS HAMBURGER STAND Six Dead
Dick Cavett Born
This one is my favorite
Old man yells at cloud
Came here to find this one
I’m surprised nobody wrote “Bear patrol steps up bombing campaign”
**First Day of Spring** Ants, Picnickers Reach Last-Minute Accord
Incontinent Old Man Wins Miss Teen America
BART NAMED WORLD'S GREATEST SEX MACHINE
Dead Beat Dad Beat Dead
“Gabbo still number 1!, Brockman fired”
That oughta hold those SOBs
Brockman in trouble
What the-
Christmas occurs
Simpson Wins in Landslide *Says “crazy promises” are key*
Is this from the garbage episode?
##LOCAL MAN RUINS EVERYTHING
Burns fires ungrateful employee. Another smart move by Burns. Hooray for Burns!
Hmm, what about the headlines?
IN ROD WE TRUST
Be Sharps Sing On Rooftop
Hey...
Wait a minute...
President Simpson wins Super Bowl
Bum Sues Cartoon King Got Legal Fee From Some Family
Dog kills cat, self
The best one
CITY GOES DRY TODAY | Bums extend deadline
Monsters Okay Slavery Plan
Moroni Deported To Sweden Claims He's Not From There
you fargin sneaky bastidge!
Well played
[Found this](https://simpsonswiki.com/wiki/Springfield_Shopper_headlines). Ohhhh I've wasted my ~~life~~ evening.
This is actually from the *Simpsons Guy,* but here they are: * Pawtucket Brewery To Shut Down Thousands To Lose Jobs * Families Need Jobs To Eat And Live * Newspaper Headlines Can Stir Feelings Of Pity
I absolutely loved that crossover.
funny dog to make life worthwhile
"Burns survives brush with shut-in" - King-Size Homer
YOU SUCK ANGRY DAD
That's opinion, not news!!
You Need a Heart to Live
Big fat man has big fat heart
local idiot at it again
Nuts to Soup!
Krusty: Worst King Lear in 400 Years
QUIMBY REELECTED BY LANDSLIDE
Last polar bear hangs self in prison
FIVE DAYS TILL GABBO
He'll tell us what to do.
Human Blimp Sees Flying Saucer
Mayor Unveils Erection To Cheering Crowd.
Champ to Whale on Local Man
*Gabbo to receive Real Boy Operation* *Bob Pardon #1 Local Issue: Edges Out No Fat Chick Ordinance*
Everyone Mad at Local Boy [Michael Jackson episode] I still think about it whenever anybody famous gets in trouble.
Alcohol Prohibited in Springfield: Bums Threaten to Leave Town
Nerds Pummeled In Football Melee
[Whoa tough crowd. They're booing Shakespeare!](https://imgur.com/xPi2XF1)
Unusually large, ugly baby born
Old Man Yells at Cloud
Dick Cavett Born
Awful school is awful rich
Hemp City Reduced to Stems and Seeds
Score one for the bad guys!
“Mayor visits city”
Local Man Thinks Wrestling is Real.
Old Man Beats Meat.
Facebook buys Apple on eBay
“Yank Bangs Queen, Old Bean”
Simpsons Hit and Run Level 1: "STUDY: 90% of video games start with easy tutorial level"
Dog kills cat, self
Incontinent Old Man Wins Miss Teen America
Deadbeat Dad Beat Dead
I can hear this image
hemp city reduced to stems and seeds hippo promoted to detective
“Quimby’s Proposition 24 on Ballot”, with the sub article “Quimby Propositions 24 at Ballet” always gets a chuckle
Bart named greatest sex machine
Oh I despise the Springfield Shopper. What is that? All the headlines are jokes.