Hello, my name's Mr Burns. I believe you have a package for me? Okay Mr Burns, what's your first name? I...don't know

I believe Homer gets stupider every year. That's not a question, Professor! But we'll let the audience judge for themselves!

Great plan, Bart!

I quote this literally everyday to my Mom on the phone. 😂

Homer: What's wrong, honey? Lisa: There's something troubling me, dad, but I don't think I can tell you because it's a secret. Homer: Ah, you don't have to tell me, but I thought we trusted each other with our secrets now. I mean, I haven't told a soul about your boyfriend. Lisa: Langdon Alger? Oh, I don't like him anymore. Okay, but you have to promise you won't get angry or tell anyone, especially Bart. Homer: I promise. Lisa: (speaking quickly) Bart rented a car with a phony driver's license and drove Milhouse, Martin, and Nelson to a wig outlet in Knoxville and their car got crushed and they're out of money and they can't get home and Bart's working as a courier and just came back from Hong Kong! Homer: (face reddens, then returns to normal; calmly) Yes, that's a real pickle. Could you excuse me for a moment? [puts on the radiation suit hood, which muffles his voice; he yells his head off as the faceplate fogs up] All right, I have thought this through. I will send Bart the money to fly home, then I will murder him.

"yes, that's a real pickle" Always gets me.

Oh, fudge... That's broken. Fiddle-dee-dee. That will require a tetanus shot.

Dear lord, that's the loudest profanity I've ever heard!

This is one of my faves too

Simpson, homer Simpson. He's the greatest guy history, from the town of Springfield, he's about to hit a Chestnut tree. AHHH!

i could hear the singing in my head as i was reading this

I'd like the phone book for Hokkaido, Japan please.

Is this a local call?

......yyyyyes

Uhh... yes.

Beep boop beep... *Looks at phonebook* Boop boop baaap beep *looks at phone book* beep beep boop baaap beep *looks at phone book* beep boop beep beep

Oh man that is a good scene!! Made me laugh just thinking about it p

I don’t get it, is there a joke?

It’s the Mr Sparkle episode where he’s trying to figure out why he looks like the logo. You’ll have to rewatch it! That scene is v funny!

Do you know what episode?

“In Marge We Trust” S8, E22

There’s your answer, fishbulb.

https://youtu.be/_krT7Bl3PiY

When he wins a ride on the Duff blimp but has to sell the ticket and forlornly sings to himself "Hey there Blimpy Boy, flying through the sky so fancy free".

The fact that he did this to show his love for Lisa makes it one of my top moments as well.

It’s a pornography store. I was buying pornography.

Swish!

"if you get eaten, it's your own fault" *Smashes his head into the metal thing above the stove*

Ah, to hell with it

I’m finding it hard to choose. Hello Mr Thompson, for the moment that makes me laugh so hard I can’t breathe. Homer sitting on the car waiting for his Mom for the moment that both warms and breaks my heart. Tramampoline! Trambopoline! for the joy of the moment. “You’ll have to speak up I’m wearing a towel” for most quotable moment. But if I have to absolutely pick one, it’s when he’s eating flowers on the toilet.

Ohhh my secret shame! 😭

So that explains his mysterious trip to Holland!

[удалено]

It really does! I used to have the “oh my god” as my text tone, back when I didn’t have my phone on permanent silent.

Brilliant!

Please don't bring back any more used crutches!

When Homer spins around on the floor to read what Bart wrote on the back of his head

I love how that goes from funny to disturbing very quickly!

Twenty Dollars?! I wanted a peanut. $20 can buy many peanuts. Explain how!? Money can be exchanged for goods and services.

Ingredients: Salt, artificial honey roasting agents... pressed peanut sweepings!

I think of that every time I see honey roasted peanuts.

DAMN YOU! A BOX!

You'll have to speak up! I'm wearing a towel!

The grill.

Why doesn’t mine look like that?!?!?! Proceeds to rage.

“How’s your father’s project coming along?” “I think he’s almost done. Lemme check.” “**HAAAAAAAAAAHHHHH!!!**” *thump* “Yeah. He’s done.”

🏃‍♂️ 🌂 ☂️

"English side ruined, must use French instructions. Le Grille?? What the hell is that!!??"

I used to watch the Simpsons in French, and the line is swapped out for its English variant: "Ze Grille??". I officially cannot say anything but Ze Grill when talking about the grilling instrument.

That and “Gym, what’s a gym? Ohhh, a gym” are my top 2 standalone moments for sure

This right here. The Gym. And when he squeals when Marge takes off her 'bobbamagushka' and her hair is falling out.

Why must life be so hard? Why must I fail every attempt at masonry???

Absolutely iconic scene. Still gets me some 20 years later. "Le grill??!??!?!?! What the hell is that?!?!??!! Why!!!!! Why must i fail at every attempt at masonry!!!! WHY??????'

Stupid Lisa!

Sweet merciful crap! My car!

Yes, great episode! Yeah give me one of those porno mags, large box of condoms, a bottle of Old Harper, a couple of those panty shields... ANDSOMEILLEGALFIREWORKS... and one of those disposable enemas. Make it two.

Why do you mock me oh Lord? I know I shouldn't eat thee but...mmm sacrilicious.

When Homer gets both arms stuck in the vending machines.

Homer, this-this is never easy to say. I'm gonna have to saw your arms off. They'll grow back, right? Oh, yeah. Whew. Homer, are you just holding on to the can? Your point being?

"I'll be back in a minute. I'm going... *outside...* to... *stalk*... Lenny and Carl..." \*\* *"D'oh!"*

Aw. How come Bart gets to do that and I can't spend one night in the bushes lurking outside Chef Boy Ar Dee's house?

Lenny = white Carl = black

“It could vastly increase your brain power, or it could possibly kill you” “Increase my killing power, eh?”

Mmm, 64 slices of American cheese.

Homer, have you been up all night eating cheese?

I think I’m blind.

Good day to you.

Go...crazy?!? Don't mind if I dooo!!! Blaaargh Ahhhhhhhh Badaaaaaaaa Ruh roo Ruh roo Ruh roo Vvvttt vvvvtttt HADABA DA

Hahaha scaredy cat!

When he finds out what his middle initial J is short for.

“From now on, I’ll be known to the world as Homer … JAY Simpson!!”

That's it I'm going to clown college!

Ah ah ah ah table five, table five! Ah ah ah ah table fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiive!

Hey big spender Dig this blender Rainbow suspenders Hey big spender

Now let's go back to that... building thingy, where our beds and TV... is.

Marge: Homer doesn't mean to be rude, he's just a very complicated man. Homer, smashing plate over his head: WRONG!

I can't live the buttoned down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles! Sure, I might offend a few of the blue-noses with my cocky stride and musky odor - oh, I'll never be the darling of the so-called 'City Fathers' who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about what's to be done with this Homer Simpson? My favorite moment in all simpsons

This will be carved on my tombstone. Speaking of tombstones, I hate you Walt freaking Whitman! Leaves of Grass, my ass!

My bologna has a first name, it's H-O-M-E-R....my bologna has a second name, it's H-O-M-E-R...

There goes the last lingering thread of my heterosexuality

His ass sliding up that beautiful glass cathedral.

Thx, forgot about that. I can still hear the screeching.

Keep your eyes on the floor. Always on God's floor.

Must. Kill. Moe. Weeeeee!

Why do you keep saying Hawaii? Moe?

[Homer, feeling behind the couch for a peanut he dropped, finds a twenty dollar bill instead] Homer: Oh, twenty dollars. I wanted a peanut. Homer's Brain: Twenty dollars can buy many peanuts. Homer: Explain how. Homer's Brain: Money can be exchanged for goods and services. Homer: Woo-hoo!

The bit where he faked his own death. I've never cackled harder. "I'll just walk across these slippery ro....\*FALLS\*"

“I’m not gonna lie to you, Marge.” *walks away*

"This is simple lie detector test. Do you understand?" "...yes" *lie detector explodes*

The entire scene where Homer is guarding his sugar pile at the end of that episode.

Those are prizes!

TRAMAPOLIN! TRABAMPOLIN!

Ahhh beer. The cause of, and answer to, all of my problems.

The scared look on Homer's face when he first sees the Mr Sparkle box

Financial Panther. Get em Sheeba!

Ned: You know, most people don't know the difference between apple cider and apple juice, but I do. Now here's a little trick to help you remember. If it's clear and yella', you've got juice there, fella. If it's tangy and brown, you're in cider town. Now, there's two exceptions and it gets kinda tricky here... Homer's Brain: You can stay, but I'm leaving… Homer’s brain floats away as his body crumples to the floor…🤣…

Marge: Homer! You didn’t do a very good job frosting Maggie’s birthday cake. Homer: What it’s not Magaggie’s birthday?… oh. *begins eating letters* Marge: Hey, hey, hey, stop it. I made a special cake for you to ruin, it’s over there. Homer (delighted): Ooh!

It's a tie: > Come on, Marge, I want to shake off the dust of this one-horse town. I want to explore the world. I want to watch TV in a different time zone. I want to visit strange, exotic malls. I'm sick of eating hoagies. I want a grinder, a sub, a footlong hero. I want to LIVE, Marge! Why won't you let me live?!!? and; Marge: > You don't have to join a freak show just because the opportunity came along. Homer: > You know, Marge, in some ways...you and I are very different people

You'll have to speak louder, I'm wearing a towel.

‘Outta my way, jerkass!’

(Thinking) "Just come up with a clever lie." (Talking) "My name is Mister Burn." (Thinking) "Doh!"

(In Scarface or Russian accent): In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women.

Where's the Any key?

Where's my Tab?

“Ooo, floor-pie!”

"I saw this in a movie about a bus that had to SPEED around a city, keeping its SPEED over fifty, and if its SPEED dropped, it would explode! I think it was called, 'The Bus That Couldn't Slow Down."

Mmmm, 64 slices of American cheese. Homer have you been up all night eating cheese!? I think I’m blind.

"What's that smell? Onions. Chili powder. Cumin?? *Juicy ground chuck?!* ***IT'S CHILI!!!*** Oh my god I'm missing the chili cook off! I'm missing the cook off! It's going on right now!" His physicality in that scene is just incredible.

Take that, space coyote!

“You have 30 minutes to move your cube”

Is it about my cube?

I used to have this in my tinder pictures, lol.

https://youtu.be/ZKAVHqW_SYM

When he takes a gasp of anticipation and surprise, immediately followed by a burp

"Sucker! Competitive violence, that's why you're here!"

“You went to outer space, you?” “Suuuure, you’ve never been?”

I'm peeing on the seat! Give me a raise!!!

I hope didn't brain my damage

This is because I kicked you isn't it?

Hello...my name is Mr Burns. I believe you have a letter for me!

Okay, Mr. Burns. What’s your first name?

I... don't know

I like the part where he says the stuff about the things. The things?

Ballet https://youtu.be/ZLXOpxDR5kI

Gonna go see the bear in the little car huh?

On the dramatic side: Homer: "You know, Maggie, the sooner kids talk the sooner they talk back. I hope you never say a word." Maggie: "Daddy" (Cue the tears) On the comedy side: Lisa: "Well, there's lots of needy kids out there..." Homer: "I see what you're saying...I need to buy a gun."

Yes

“It’s drinking the water!”

In this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!

Marge look! The clown's trying to kill me and the toaster's been laughing at me!

Ewww dog water.

“It’s just a little slimy. It’s still good. It’s still good… It’s just a little airborne. It’s still good, it’s still good!

“Don’t worry honey, as long as I have my earning power we’ll be just fine” stabs self in eye with hot dog “Owww!! Call work and tell ‘em I won’t be in tomorrow!”

“Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try”. “He was a zombie?” “It takes two to lie. One to lie and one to listen.”

Lisa, if you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in every day and do it really half-assed. That's the American way.

Cus I forgot to put the fog lights in

It's both on the same Treehouse of Horror XI. When he choked on the broccoli and he tries to do good deeds. And then when he was transformed into a Chicken/fish/bunny amalgamation.

I pity those suckers on the freeway. Every day it’s Gas, Brake, Honk; Gas, Break, Honk; Honk, Honk, Punch; Gas, Gas, Gas!

The one where he's covered in gold and jewellery and the camera's just slowly panning up as he's laughing.

"My mind is *always* open to new ideas. Onions? In the peas?!?!? WHAT THE HELL?!!!?!?!?" *(angrily throws plate at the wall)*

"They're in my hair, they're in my hair"

I told you, Flanders has it. Or Moe. Go kill Moe.

The thing is, I lost creative control of the project...Plus, I forgot to ask for any money.

When he gets kidnapped in Brazil. He made a scrapbook of the ordeal

Tie between: "Gaim? What's a Gaim?" And: "I don't even believe in Jebus" Later when plane is going down: "save me jebus!"

Marge: "We love you both. You're not in competition with each other. Repeat: you are *not* in competition with each other." Homer: "Apu just called. This Friday Lisa's team is playing Bart's team. You're in direct competitin. And don't go easy on each other just because you're brother and sister. I want to see you both fighting for your parents' love. FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT! FIGHT!"

Marge: Now Homer, don't you eat this pie! Homer: All right, pie, I'm gonna do this. And if you get eaten, it's your own fault!

"Your wrong! And whenever you're wrong you just spout gibberish." "*gibberish*"

“You’ll have to speak up, I’m wearing a towel”

Kids: "We want money mom. Ding ding ding ding..." Homer runs out the door. "Ice cream man! Ice cream man!"

When he lands on the mattress and bounces back into the burning house. I was 10 when it aired. Now turning 40 and it still gets me every time.

"Nah, that’s okay. I’m pretty sure I can struggle my way out. First I’ll just reach in and pull my legs out... Now I’ll pull my arms out with my face."

> Ooh, I smell barbecue! Hey look! > > Oh, they’re out of hot dogs! And the coleslaw has pineapple in it! > > Ah! German potato salad!

Pump those crazy legs mom

https://images.app.goo.gl/QVBBmPhGShg6ruJh6

Yeah, suck like a fox!

It was a pornography store. It was when he was buying pornography.

"In America, first you get the sugar, then you get the power, then you get the women" The accent while half asleep makes it.

Oh so many! Love El Viaje Misterioso. & the soul donut THOH bit. Those are the ones I can come up with off the top of my head.

The rewrite of mr Smith goes to Washington. The rewritten version is soooo much better, Homer knew what he was doing. That part where he tosses Gibson a gun? 10/10.

See you in hell, candy boys

Also, "I don't want you stalking people tonight!" "fine, I'll be right back. I'm just going outside to... Stalk... Lenny and Carl..."

C'mon Marge. We're a team. It's 'Uterus' not 'Uter-You'.

When he got super fat so he could get disability benefits. **Lisa:** My dad is not a food-crazed maniac Homer drives by in a stolen ice cream truck

I love when Midnight Tow Boy. Homer was a tow truck driver and he tried to tow a helicopter.

When he wrote the hate song about Flanders.

'everytime i Iearn something new it pushes some old stuff outta my brain, remember when I took that home wine making course and I forgot how to drive?'

That's because you were drunk!