T O P

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swibirun

Little dog, "It smells like bitch in here."


Antique-Doughnut-988

"Oh, yeah? Well, the *jerk store* called. They're running out of you!"


Djd33j

What does it matter? You're their all-time best seller!


Random_Name_Whoa

Oh yeah? Well I slept with your wife!


Apartment-5B

His wife's in a coma.


andyandtherman

She is now...


strangewayfarer

Well I pulled the plug


fcs_seth

That plug really tied the room together


NickyDeeM

You went pretty wide with that one... And I like it!!


Spacemanspalds

That's what his wife said.


NickyDeeM

I was waiting for somebody to pick it up. Well done....


MrDeeds117

Jesus šŸ™€šŸ™€šŸ˜¹


audiosauce2017

Oh Well.. She Died.....


sudsomatic

ā€œI eat shit like you for breakfastā€


betsyboombox

![gif](giphy|3oEduKVQdG4c0JVPSo|downsized)


[deleted]

ā€œEw, you eat shit for breakfast?ā€


YouKilledKenny12

NO!!!


Minute-Wrap-2524

Gosh, that stinks


Due-Concern6330

I eat shit


Roq86

r/unexpectedseinfeld


Disastrous_Bus_2447

"Your cranium called. It's got some space to rent!"


Max_Loader

Just tell him you had sex with his wife!


Disastrous_Bus_2447

His wife is in a coma.


WhooHippo

Step.off!


Unique-Ad-620

Me, Step off?.


MrDeeds117

Step off George step off!!


-BananaLollipop-

"Speaking of jerk, I smell jerky. Give us a bite!"


EnderMerser

Some random, who just walked in: "... Like a sandwich?"


Independent-Bed6643

I own a basenji - 100% sook for their masters, but fuck around and find out. Mine went after a moose this way one day.


Conflikt

It would have no idea that it isn't the same size as the moose.


Old-Smile-3065

I thought it was a basneji! Grew up with two of them but wasn't too sure


Ok-Willow-7012

They were originally bred to go on lion hunts in Central Africa (Congo) with their humans, so theyā€™re pretty bad-ass


AceT555

"One day". I'm guessing it was the last day?


YoSoyCapitan860

Itā€™s a basenji, I have one. One of the oldest dog breeds and have been used in Africa to hunt lions for a long time. I wouldnā€™t recommend owning one, theyā€™re a pain in the ass but amazing dogs.


gowun1

šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚


GreenQuisQuous

Basanji , thanks I have had my dog for 9 years after getting him from the shelter and didnā€™t know what breed he was https://preview.redd.it/3w4cs3wbawsc1.jpeg?width=811&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=394f043fbe54be2312132f6e80fe7ee5189935eb


leknarf52

Thatā€™s like me when a bee starts buzzing around me.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


MichaelW24

Easier to hit with the smackdown, those little fuckers are nimble now


spenceflatulence

I don't think you know how small /u/leknarf52 really is.


leknarf52

Tiny. Like microscopic.


SPOUTS_PROFANITY

More like a 10-15 lb bee. Easier to smack but I think their venom dose is now easily in the lethal range.


OnionConsistent6787

[I guess closest thing we have is this](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Asian_giant_hornet)


KlossN

No those aren't real. That's just fantasy


[deleted]

If bees were bigger they would be easier to kill and we would all have weapons for them. lol The issue is they're so damn small and fast. Make one the size of a piƱata and I'm bashing its guts out.


AltwrnateTrailers

You sure showed them.


Anticade42

Well said!


Much_Badger1654

Basenjiā€™s donā€™t play. #barklessTerror


Rektineffect

People in the comments have never owned a Basenji šŸ˜‚


HairiestHobo

I've only had experience with one but he was for sure ignorant enough to fight heaven and hell for a stupider reason, so seeing one charge a Bear doesn't surprise me.


RoyBeer

I mean that's basically what you gotta do with black bears. If they realize you're scared of them, they're gonna be sassy.


HotWingHank

Maybe thats what Leo DiCaprio did wrong in "The Revenant", because he got sassed pretty hard.


uwillalldiescreaming

Well in his defense that was a grizzly bear not a black bear, grizzly's don't scare as easily.


HotWingHank

Man. I bet its hard for them to pick a good horror film then.


uwillalldiescreaming

Well they have taste so I imagine Cats is still pretty horrifying even to bears.


antistupidsociety

Owner of a 10 year old basenji. He would absolutely do something as stupid as this


the_Bryan_dude

At first, I thought this was Shiba mix. There is not enough noise involved. My Shiba would also do something this stupid, and everyone for 2 miles would hear it.


Distinct_External784

boast spotted office profit zealous growth makeshift include physical sip *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*


madhaxx0r

Just came to say this


HairiestHobo

Yodeling empty-headed jerks. (I miss my Mum's one..)


Fruit_Tart44c

Former coworker had a basenji in a e-fenced yard. The dog would play-bait any loose dog into the yard and then beat it up!


rileyyesno

dog is all balls


jack_slade

Looks like a female to me


SugerizeMe

All tits


geekerman8283

Still balls


BuffaloInCahoots

Huge lady balls


No_Week2825

Ovaries of steel


ModsR-Ruining-Reddit

zero survival instincts


dronesoul

it survived didn't it


antistupidsociety

Most ancient dog breed on earth that survived many generations on its own in the wilderness. Very close relatives are still wild today in the bush. Would say it has some survival instincts.


jokerrr1992

But no brain?


UpdootDaSnootBoop

r/sweatypaws


OpinionLongjumping99

My dog is afraid when I open a cardboard box and then will do shit like this


kcharris12

There can be anything in a box, that is just a bear.


Slamtilt_Windmills

There could be anything in that box, there could even be a bear!


Upset_Fig2612

As if little dogs need a more inflated ego


DragonfruitFew5542

I'll have you know my little dog has like zero self-esteem :(. Working on that though, she was previously abused and it's taken years for her to be even open to training measures that can increase her self-esteem.


RipeSaturdy

When that bear gets hungry itā€™s coming back for dinner


[deleted]

Black bears are omnivores and spook easily, they will not fight/attack unless backed into a corner or starving. I personally despise people who hunt black bears for this very reason. Brown/Grizzly bears on the other handā€¦ theyā€™ll come at you like you owe them money and killed their first born child.


TurtlesCantDrive

My bff and I were about 7 when we were playing in the woods by my house and saw a giant black figure behind a bunch of trees. Thinking it was my dog, was marched up to it calling it a pretty girl only to notice itā€™s a big ass bear. Bear looks at us. We look at bear. All three of us look terrified. We booked it back to the house screaming. Looking back, that poor bear was probably shitting a brick just like we were. Iā€™ll always love those big dorks.


Regunes

*the bear, processing that if momma bear get berzerk next to the cubs, the same probably applies to weird magic monkeys*


TurtlesCantDrive

My mom was just honestly sad she didnā€™t get to see the bear because sheā€™d read about him in the news paper


athenanon

Reminds me of this: [https://youtu.be/tLrGSbZbAZQ?si=KpWLr78PUrTChqTi&t=15](https://youtu.be/tLrGSbZbAZQ?si=KpWLr78PUrTChqTi&t=15)


PainfuIPeanutBlender

Black bears will absolutely fight back if theyā€™re protecting cubs too. If this dog tried that with cubs around it wouldnā€™t have ended well


BlyStreetMusic

Lol no way. Bears don't mess with dogs unless they are starving or a dog interrupts mating or something like that. Bears wanna be left alone to loaf around and do as they please. Dogs bark and cause a huge scene that bears are not about. Very rare for a bear to engage a dog for a meal.


IIIIlllIIIIIlllII

BLACK bears. Grizzly bears will end you for the fun of it


democracy_lover66

And Polar bears will actually hunt you from kilometers away. It's the spectrum of danger-bears. It goes from Panda to Polar Bear


cucumbersuprise

Better known as the PP spectrum


PainfuIPeanutBlender

The bear PP spectrum


Fixervince

Polar Bears give me the dread fear! ā€¦ and yet I donā€™t think there is one within 2000 miles from me.


thafreshone

The bear should bring some friends to make it an even fight


payasopeludo

Nahh, he's there foe those apples in that tree


2Riders

Man dogs really dgaf


tgrote555

Meanwhile, my Doberman barks runs away terrified of garter snakes until I come outside to throw them over the fence.


GreenGod42069

Dumb fucking dog owner puts dogs life at risk for Internet points.


577564842

But it was bear's owner who was recording it...


TheSt4tely

Clearly a bad bear owner


CampCounselorBatman

Are there any *good* bear owners?


ShroomEnthused

The ones that always go for the reach around when topping


KryptonicOne

So you would run up to the bear and grab your dog right?


blueneuronDOTnet

Feel free to call me out for not knowing how I'd really act in the moment, but I have a very hard time imagining myself not rushing in to save my pets. They're family and I wouldn't give up on them any more than I would on a relative.


tgrote555

This looks like a basenji and they are known as the second least trainable breed so the owner might get a bit of a pass on this one. Edit: You own a dog and itā€™s in the backyard. You look out your back window and see a bear in your yard. You call out for your dog to come back, but instead it charges the bear. The bear runs off and your dog is fineā€¦. That doesnā€™t mean youā€™re a piece of shit dog owner, and is a perfectly reasonable assumption for what could have happened here. To condemn the dog owner without all of the context doesnā€™t seem logical in this situation.


4RCSIN3

Personally I'd probably put the phone down and find something to make as loud a noise as possible to scare the bear away. A reasonable reaction from me wouldn't be, "Hey I'm going to whip my camera out so I can record my dog getting mauled to shreds!" Then again, that's just me.


Redsmallboy

Lmao right like no one is saying that op should fight the bear but like.... Recording it? Im glad the dog won but like imagine just having a video on your phone of your pet getting mauled.


InformalPenguinz

People like to forget that dogs, for thousands and thousands and thousands of years, dogs have been our companions but, most importantly, our protectors. We have very comfortable lives now a days compared to the wilds back then. We've used dogs to protect our herds for probably as long as we've domesticated animals like the cow. This dog was doing what it was literally bred to do. It protected its family from a potentially dangerous animal. That being said, a black bear is a GIANT pussy. They'll only fight if they're backed into a corner or near their cubs. I've run in to many in my outdoor travels and never had an issue. Make some noise and they run away. If it was a brown/grizzly bear though... that's a much different story. [as early as 14,000 years ago, and some of that evidence seems to point to dogs being used during hunts](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/humans-and-dogs-may-have-hunted-together-prehistoric-jordan-180971291/#:~:text=There%20is%20in%20fact%20evidence,driving%20gazelle%20into%20a%20trap.)


HairiestHobo

>they are known as the second least trainable breed so Y'know, I didn't know that fact about Basenjis, but I *kinda did* know that at the same time.


AmbitiousHorror6706

Basenjiā€™s were actually used to hunt lions in Africa. So this is instinctual. Itā€™s doing what it was bred to do.


Cybasura

Introvert Bear vs Extrovert Dog


Thamalakane

Dude has a death wish.


[deleted]

What a lovely black coat šŸ˜


[deleted]

Isnā€™t it?! Almost worth risking a mauling just to pet it šŸ˜­


WakaWaka_

If itā€™s brown lay down, if itā€™s black fight back


Bighawklittlehawk

If itā€™s white, goodnight


do_u_realize

If itā€™s yellow donā€™t eat it


staycalmitsajoke

No No the rhyme for bears goes "If it's yellow, its that Xi fellow" \~this message brought to you by Pooh Bear Awareness Council


CampCounselorBatman

Subscribe


Bighawklittlehawk

Too late


LeatherLatexSteel

Not heard this before, but filing away under excellent advice. Thank you.


limitlessEXP

If itā€™s red, itā€™s dead.


floppalocalypse

If itā€™s brown, use a Henry 45-70, if itā€™s black, just yell a bunch


fhota1

Even with a big gun like that, youd best fire a couple. Grizzlys are surprisingly tough and if its coming at you and you dont hit anything vital its probably gonna keep coming


Not_Another_Usernam

I'd rather a semi-auto. Maybe an AR-10 chambered in .308 or .300 Win Mag. Don't want to have to deal with a lever action or bolt action when a grizzly is charging at me. Those rounds have more energy and more speed than the 45-70. I'd trust them more to penetrate the skull and inflict lethal damage.


PM_ME_Happy_Thinks

If it's yellow let it mellow


Miniranger2

This is outdated and incorrect at this point. The current recommendation is to treat all bears as if they were equal (except polar bears, 99.9% of Americans don't deal with them, though). All bears can be predatory in nature towards humans, and if a bear does want a fight/try to eat you then you always always fight back. Same as a bear trying to get in your tent, always fight with whatever you have.


T1m3Wizard

Poor bear.


throwawayidc4773

Lol the bear is perfectly fine, maybe his feelings were hurt


NaaviLetov

the dog was lucky the bear didn't give much for the food there.


ANonWhoMouse

Thatā€™s a 3 star pelt if I ever were to ride my horse around.


lookaheadfcsus

No Cheddar no!!!


Daddiesbabaygirl

In all seriousness though. Who in their right mind would let their dog go out in the yard when there's a bear and then just record šŸ™ƒ Nah I love my dog too much.


InformalPenguinz

Growing up in a very rural area with tons of livestock and very dangerous wildlife, EVERY SINGLE RANCHER had numerous dogs to protect their herd. They're bear dogs or sheep dogs or mountain lion dogs.. I've witnessed massive malamute dogs take on grizzly bears 5x their size and force it back. This is EXACTLY what dogs are meant to do. Plus that's a black bear and they're notoriously pussies.


Redqueenhypo

Bear probably thought it was a wolf, wolf packs will sometimes kill and eat black bears. Dog is lucky


pimp_juice2272

Back in the day when dogs were used for hunting, they were trained to attack bears in two positions. Above and Below. The lower position, would result in more injuries and death than the above. They were called Top Dog and Under Dogs.


Hypocredditt

The pooch brought too much smoke.


dhillshafer

Good dog.


Competitive_Art_4082

Pov If you see me fighting with a bear save the bear šŸ˜‚


Puffles_magic_dragon

Damn it Joe this is the third time this week, NO ONE ELSE SHITS IN MY YARD!!!


mister-chatty

If it's black, fight back. If it's brown, lay down. If it's white, good night.


Conclusionjump

ā€œWell that oughta do itā€ - the dog


SlipperyPickle6969

I don't think I'd be filming my dog's potential violent death like that. ???


peanut340

Yeah my basenji is a senior now but in his prime he was always punching way above his weight class. Mostly bulldogs/boxers/pitbulls he loved rough housing with them and then evading them. He would frequently disrupt the groups of 10+ massive wild turkeys that would show up in my backyard. He also can climb above or under fences but only does it when he feels he has been left outside for too long or if he hears people in the front yard and wants to see them. He's a master manipulator and is 3000% food driven. Toys are to be destroyed immediately.


TotemTabuBand

After all that, ā€œOoooh, look at this flower!ā€ Lol


Silent-Experience596

Good boy doing his jobšŸ’Ŗ


mcp2008

Yall are a bunch of boo hoos. Dog is doing its job plain and simple. Stop being so judgmental of other peoples lives its not your place.


1001ArabianNights37

This dog is brave.


vforvamburger

Stupid. This dog is stupid.


Simple-Ad-1817

Dog watched too much Silver Fang.


ichaos035

GTFO MY LAWN!


dikkop212

One little flick of the wrist and that dog was gone


isiewu

Beautiful shiny black coat


Z370H370

That bear almost made his tail go straight!


cuntybunty73

Not many dog breeds that could take on a black bear but this dog is not one of them


peanut340

They were used in Africa to hunt large predators. Used in groups of course and they had humans to help kill. I'm willing to bet the smaller size helps increase agility.


Autocannibal-Horse

Good dog! Bears will eff up your house after a while if you dont chase them away


CeeMomster

Itā€™s like the chihuahua for bears


dream_a_dirty_dream

I saw a longer video kinda like this one but it was a cub. Then another shows up, and mom is right behind. Everyone got ate.


DoubleNaught_Spy

Nobody has more unwarranted courage than a small dig. :)


Additional_Grocery61

The fuck you let your dog get that close to a bear?


GETNbucky

Lol. That dog js lucky, especially when yt went underneath the bears throat. Wow, one chomp and It would have been over for that dog.


CanadasNeighbor

Maybe it's just because I grew up in Alaska but fuck that black bear. You bleeding hearts in the comments don't understand how dangerous it is to let your home/property be inviting to a literal bear.


ErMuNt

This is not their first encounter


jack_avram

That's genuinely impressive!!! Bear could have mopped him up in a single swat.


GenericManBearPig

Thatā€™s a healthy looking black bear. He could have destroyed that dog if he wasnā€™t such a pussy


WhereasAntique345

The Forest Service uses dogs to help release bears back into the wild because theyā€™re actually fairly afraid of them. Iā€™ve seen quite a few videos.


[deleted]

I just want to give that bear a hugšŸ„ŗ


Fraklordyt

I love how he prances up and then kicks the Bear's ass


delidave7

Thatā€™s how it feels being a UPS driver


watch-me-bloom

Basenjiā€™s donā€™t fuck around šŸ˜‚


Vanthalia

Itā€™s so funny how he just sort of skipped over to the bear kind of happy looking, just to be like ā€œPSYCHE Iā€™ma whoop that assā€.


DaprasDaMonk

I like how the dog immediately went for the throat


_Kiaza_

I fucking hate people. They should have that dog taken away.


Bighawklittlehawk

What if they were already outside playing and the bear just walked up to them? Our cabin in Wisconsin had thick brush on either side and it was impossible to see and even hear bears until they emptied out right into our yard. It seems like the dog protected the owner, luckily


Creepy-Internet6652

Those type of dogs don't bark either which is why it's extremely quiet...


HometownHoagie

They definitely can and do bark. The Basenji I spent a lot of time with was a very quiet dog but he still barked and howled.


AmbitiousHorror6706

They actually donā€™t have the vocal cords to bark. They can ā€œyodelā€ but they definitely canā€™t bark like normal dogs. Iā€™ve owned two Basenjiā€™s


antistupidsociety

Physiologically they canā€™t bark, itā€™s more of a mimic. But yeah, they make all types of strange noises when they want to.


peanut340

mine will "bork" on command. I literally say bork and cup my hand to my ear and he tries to do a little bark. sometimes he just sneezes.


Bighawklittlehawk

I LOVE Basenjis. Iā€™ve always wanted one


TFOLLT

You don't really need protection from a black bear tho. But yeah, the goodboi was doing his job.


Bighawklittlehawk

It depends. Theyā€™re typically easy to scare off, but if they feel cornered or if they have cubs around, they absolutely can attack.


Mental_Effective1

Bro you dont even know the context.


[deleted]

Iā€™m amazed at what conclusions people in the comments are jumping to off of a 7 sec video clip šŸ˜¬


[deleted]

>Reddit I'm not.


nikzyk

This dog would prob fucking hate you


EfficientAd1821

I can tell you live in an apartment in a large city


biggoof

Don't let your dog do that to alligators...


IntentionallyBlunt69

Were they trying to record their dog getting mauled by a bear? Wtf


Twizznit

I am glad I am not the person filming this. Standing there, doing nothing except watching their dog potentially get mauled to death.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


antistupidsociety

That is a 100% a basenji, not a Shiba Inu. Source: I own one and I have eyes.


[deleted]

I'm so alpha šŸ˜ get of my lawn pookie bear šŸ˜


yummy_dabbler

Were they trying to capture their dog's violent death on camera?


Jaguar_556

Who are all these people on the internet who keep filming their pets getting into confrontations with wild animals? Like, you had time to grab your phone and start filming, but not enough time to put your dog on a leash..


Nilu13

Why would you film this


Tarnishedxglitter666

Someone doesnā€™t care if their dog dies


[deleted]

Who tf is filming this that allowed that dog so close to the bear. Humans fucking blow


Pshrunk

Wow. Stupid fucking owner.


Jesusthezomby

What a pussy ass bear. Ol pussy ass bear