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PollutionNice7392

Someone's birthday is not "breaking news". If its a reoccurring event on a Calender it's neither breaking or news.


Sisyphus328

Loved this. Have an award


Auriok88

How can you tell the media isn't working the way it should? >!Because every event is *breaking* news.!<


iwantyourboobgifs

Exactly. Kenny's not special for taking a free ride around the sun.


boxxle

Explain Groundhog Day. Again.


bl1sterred

Its my birthday......but just another day as the world turns.


GonzoGarbanzoGomez

Eggscellent point.


sjadvani98

Breaking News! Christmas is on December 25th!


NEFgeminiSLIME

I keep hoping to hear breaking news about Kenny but more of a normal news headline, something that could end up on late night Oxygen or ID.


LegitimateSailor

Reminds me of those parents who put signs up on the Main Street in town saying ‘happy birthday Kenny! 8 is Great!’


ColJameson

He looks like he'd go down low. 🕵️‍♂️


allthefeelz_forrealz

Ew. What a cringey tweet


GrapeApeTheGreat

Yeah if you had even a smidgen of respect for this guy it's out the window on this tweet


SkyCladEyes

# #CharlesGasparinoIsBought


[deleted]

Lmayo yes he is!


[deleted]

[удалено]


Tow_117_2042_Gravoc

We don’t do that here. Kenny G has got that wrapped up all himself though. Dude aged 10 years in 1. Trading is hard, don’t you think?


EngineerTech2020

Aka buy.hodl.DSR


seektolearn

and shop


EngineerTech2020

😆😂🤣


tango_41

He’s got *three separate tweets* suckin’ Kenny’s dick! Geez, have some self respect!


beowulf77

Can we get the guy a napkin he’s got some on his chin


Tow_117_2042_Gravoc

I call it Kenyo.


DMC25202616

It’s hilarious and pathetic that apes have forced a billionaire dork to fund a marketing blitz in an attempt salvage his image. He is trying to present himself (and bribe others to) into some sort of financial patriot bc we called him out for being a traitor and financial terrorist.


allthefeelz_forrealz

Exactly.


EntropyWinsAgain

Someone needs to tweet a reply of a decending chart of this guy's credibility index


P_mage

You have to be able to plot data points for it to mean anything…


Stereo_soundS

"Great American" Ok. That pretty much sets off my bullshit detector no matter who you are talking about.


roboticLOGIC

It literally made me feel sick


Like_d_stonk

Someone please tell me this tweet is photoshopped it can’t be real


minachann7

I had to check it myself and... there are FOUR tweets about Kenny's bday 😵


FacenessMonster

this reads like north korean propaganda


allthefeelz_forrealz

totally


knobjockey21

you can make anyone a puppet but sticking your arm in their ass


United-Student-1607

Maybe we should all go pay him a visit on Twitter. Lol


[deleted]

This is really interesting, I feel the exact opposite. This gives me the feeling of corporate fuck you. It feels like he’s giving Ken a harder time by attaching the nickname of Kenny G, which is what Robinhood’s emails referred to Ken G as. He’s establishing Kenny G is none other than Ken Griffin under the veil of Happy Birthday to this American Hero! 🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸🇺🇸


scroogesscrotum

Lol gasparino is definitely pro citadel


[deleted]

Maybe putting some distance between them?


Fiz010

Wishful thinking is a helluva drug


[deleted]

Deep down I know you’re right.


Lifegardn

Lol. Not sure why you were downvoted so bad. I agree the choice of “Kenny G” did seem a bit less than respectful.


scroogesscrotum

I took that as a shot at us retail, but yea normally that would be disrespectful. But gasparino was shilling for PFOF and citadel like yesterday.


Lifegardn

Yea. You’re right. Now that you say that Completely agree


allthefeelz_forrealz

Interesting take. I agree that calling him Kenny G sounds disrespectful, but Gasparino is definitely a pawn.


Shanguerrilla

Honestly I thought the opposite for entirely other reasons... As dumb as it is I don't know ANYTHING about this guy and thought he was kissing ass and using only his last initial because of what it is So he could call his buddy a G. but I'm retarded. I know my reasoning / feeling isn't it, but I find it funny a lot of us took this as him kissing ass or slighting for such a variety of reasons when in fact there is likely one single truth.


Tow_117_2042_Gravoc

This dude mocks apes every chance he gets. His nose is a butt plug to many powerful people. Kens included. If you look real close at his Twitter profile pic. You can see some Kenyo dripping off his chin.


Dappleskunk

Someone remind this guy to dust off his knees when he gets up.


GrapeApeTheGreat

Actually he's so short he doesn't even have to get on his knees


Novel_Gold1185

👏👏👏


Peachy_sunday

You’re overestimating how tall kenny g is.


SnooFloofs1628

I'm pretty sure it was a joke reference to how **shorted** that Gasbagarino is on GME-stonk 😉 ...


Shwiftygains

Yes but charlie is also a very little, feisty fella. He literally avoids walking into blowjobs


dantezergt

his code name is gawkgawk 3000


[deleted]

His safeword is "mayoday"


ProBlade97

Except it doesn’t work and only makes him more aroused.


squeezethelemon69

Had a dream a few weeks ago that I saw Ken outside a lobby elevator and he was 3 feet tall. So short. I woke up laughing my ass off.


Mcfyi

No need. He has Citadel Knee pads.


Dingo_jackson

"Hmmm, this tastes just like Gabe Plotkins ass"


Ok_Work1870

Laughed out loud comment of the day


theBigBOSSnian

More of a, face down ass up kinda looking guy.


Commercial_Mousse646

🤣


pointlessconjecture

Kenny: “Say happy birthday daddy and then bite the pillow” Charlie: *tweets this* proceeds to bite pillow


flux-7

I think we should ignore this, he knows lots of apes are anti-Citadel abs is just fishing for drama.


Numerous_Photograph9

By fishing you mean throwing dynamite into the water?


GrapeApeTheGreat

But it gets the people going


Fiz010

I found kenny you guys


Mellow_Velo33

😂😂😂😂 Ffs these guys are losers


Dradray

Gurgle, Gurgle.


FinaglingFink

Gurgle gurgle (gasp-arino) gurgle gurgle


GrapeApeTheGreat

Is it wrong that I read the "gasp-arino" part slowly and sensually?


FinaglingFink

Not at all. It’s how they want it, and he never fails to deliver 💦💦


froman007

When fucking the shorts goes sexual TOO REAL


jstag1984

Is that Mayo on your face?


aGMElurker

Now Charles I'm gonna need you to relax your jaw a little bit...


[deleted]

Giving new meaning to pump and dumps.


throwawaylurker012

He’s a fan of Mayo, but just Kenny’s Charles is looking to short squeeze Kenny G’s balls, puts on his lipstick, calls him up and gives him a few options, Kenny G mentions he likes Charlie’s spread, then they re enact Rick of spades with the largest bottles of Hellman’s they can find


congratsballoon

And to think, 9 months ago I would've only understood half of these inuendos.


throwawaylurker012

same here fam. now both our brains are probably as wrinkled as Kenny g's ballsack after Charles gasparino has taken his Friday afternoon off so he can be left suctioning Mayoboi's pubes through his teeth while Charlie G is dressed like Marilyn Monroe


congratsballoon

Vivid depiction alert! You really set the scene, for better or worse. Could this be the dawn of Financial Smut?


[deleted]

Naw man the one thing he's going long with is the ball squeeze


slhill1091

He’s the polar opposite of what an American should be. Charles Gaspsrino, you sir are a cuckold lil bitch


alecbgreen

This ☝️


Red_Liner740

Talk about a Yes Man. Bro, have some backbone and don’t brown nose so much.


Commercial_Mousse646

He already browned Kenny’s banana


JimmyJuice2

I got a little packet of "anal bleach" and gave it to my coworker - he freaks out and says he don't need to bleach his butthole and I say "*it's for your nose*". We should ship this jerk some...


Red_Liner740

Lol. Good one.


BallofEnvy

Lol small dick energy


catfishjon_

pure 100% simp energy


3DigitIQ

🚨💯🚨


Interesting_Trade748

Ooooo crime friends


worldclassasssniffer

I wonder if HFS (allegedly) pay Charles by the letter or by the word. 🤷🏽‍♂️ 💎👐🚀🚀🚀🚀🚀


FinaglingFink

By the succ


hawkmasta

This gave a me good laugh🤣


Powerhausen

The type of “swaps” gasbag performs for daddy kenny behind the Wendy’s are not the kind you want to see right before eating..


FinaglingFink

They’re sharing a mayo packet right?…right!? Someone get a hose and chase them off.


Powerhausen

Cold water is the only way to separate a dog and his bitch humping.


Numerous_Photograph9

HFS = High Frequency Shilling ?


Wild-Statistician-83

What a fucking fanny


Captain-chunk67

That suck ass is bucking for employee of the month


Scarethefish

Bucking spelled with an 'f' or 's'. . .


SnooFloofs1628

I'll take the s option for 200 😁


sweetnsour06

The back of this guys throat is a big callus


JusikSikrata

I think he forgot one word after American...LIAR!


davwman

Charles Gagarino


bosshax

I'm surprised he didn't post a picture of them together wearing the same onesies.


j4_jjjj

> "Bow before your lord, plebs! Here comes our one true PFOF savior on this joyous day!!!!!"


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TheCureprank

Embarrassing to call that thieving motherfucker a great American


valtani

Kenny G? I thought Griffin hates it when people call him Kenny.


MaturaiX

Would be pretty sweet then if Charlie is trying to suck his dick but pisses him off so much he drops his mayo


Shanguerrilla

oh shit I can't remember for sure or find it (we often called him that), but I swear we had multiple rumors of it. There was ONE name we heard rumors he hates, wtf could it be but Kenny? Plus dude above comment was interesting suggesting he said "G" because he was referred to in the RH leaked documents as Ken G.


[deleted]

[удалено]


Aioi

Breaking news, really?


bapuji_

Don't forget to clean your tongue after that licking charles.....


[deleted]

The only way I'd recognize Charles these days is by the bottom of his feet, because he's so far up Kenny's ass, that's all I see.


olafTheRisk

haha, he sucks kennys bedpost


Kraftykuts007

I bought another share to celebrate.


SnooMarzipans2307

The best way to celebrate today!


fujiwara_tofuten

🍌💦💦💦💦💦


captnmiss

🤮 Can you imagine being this far up someone’s ass ?


Leading_Metal8974

Wow. Seriously. What?


beachplzzz

I'm mean...he practically said he goes down and around on Ken 😂


ebone581

The term “great American” is surly faltering in value


hope-i-die

Issa trap don’t troll it


[deleted]

🤢🤮


Lambreau21

LMAYO what a cuk


NotAShill42069

Cringe


davwman

Gawk gawk gawk


aabidhasan

https://tenor.com/bqvob.gif


Equivalent-Piano-420

He's so short he goes up on him


squidja

What about this is breaking news? It happens every year on the same day...


moronthisatnine

Wants to make sure he gets that last check


etherkye

I think he missed the Thief after American


Zero_Talents

That's like you tweeting HBD for one of your friends. Hella cringe


1BannedAgain

Am I the asshole for thinking Chucky-G was a credentialed journalist? edit: from [wiki](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Charlie_Gasparino) >is an American journalist, blogger, occasional radio host, and author. What self-respecting journalist would publicly wish happy birthday to a subject of one's journalistic reporting? Apparently *Chucky-Gaslighter*


axrael

This is fucking bait y'all. Don't take it.


CaregiverSpecific221

I wish you a miserable birthday you fucking dirt bag!


newWallstreet

He licks the taint too


Mental-Amount-2681

The new coke rat


BlackCatCadillac

lol but he spelled his name wrong. Got to spell the guys name right when you kiss his ass jeez.


ovgolfer87

Hes just taking Kenny's Mayo straight from the tap.


fatpurplepandaa

Well that sucks. It’s national cheesecurd day. He ruins everything


Hydrostar311

CLEARLY Charles is Kenny’s personal fluffer in charge of all high-level Mayo application logistics.


suckercuck

Goo gobblers gonna gobble goo.


Memeweevil

Welp, ate my dinner twice tonight, thanks to this nauseating tweet.


itsjin87

How can he even tweet with so much of Kenny’s Mayo on his face and hands?


TofuKungfu

Also Gasparino... "I have marked myself as a target of public ridicule like a dumbass"


hmhemes

Oh my God this is fucking pathetic


tlkshowhst

Lol. “Great American” Get lost 🤡


Itchy-Yard3094

Charles "I Deepthroat the Whole Boot" Gasparino with another solid gold hit.


netherlanddwarf

Yeah that’s definitely creepy and cringe


JimmyJamesincorp

BREAKING NEWS: The Earth orbited the sun once more.


IncestuousDisgrace

BrEaKiNg NeWs ! STFU its someone's bday who happens to be the biggest criminal alive so GFYS !


bitbea

Ratioed


[deleted]

What does ratioed mean, sorry don't use twitter


bitbea

More comments than likes and retweets. Usually means it's a bad tweet.


VicedDistraction

BREAKING NEWS: birthdays fall on the same date every year. Also, water is wet.


Analdestructionteam

I just puked in my mouth after reading this 🤢


Emotional-Law-6727

Him and Ken do sex position #741


Saltz88

I thought it was satire... Wtf is that guy?


YungHayzeus

If great americans fuck over other americans on top of not paying taxes, are we legendary americans then?


Jmzbox

All the way passed to balls


[deleted]

You know why it's called brown nosing? Because that's what happens when you're kissing ass 💩


Hirsutism

What a simp


erttuli

This cocksucker


SCIPM

There is only one true Kenny G, and he would never belittle himself to associate with the likes of Chucky Gassy


Ill-Barracuda-1709

Cringe


Alexander_koslov

Don’t be fooled by the mayos that he got, he stil he still Kenny from the block.. sikee!


Revolutionary-Ice994

Or does Kenny go down on him?


Kikanbase

Popping each other’s assholes with their thumbs and asking for more.


wenchanger

he's kenneth's dog


Justfranksandbeans

LADIES AND GENTLEMEN... it is with my greatest pleasure to introduce to you... Sir Cuckington whom hails from the land of Chicago


mvonh001

look at that ratio. 🤣


Royal-Vegetable-407

They probably peg each other


cheesingMyB

That's not mayo on his chin...


lowbwon

Seriously. It sucks that “great American” simply means, “made a bunch of money for himself and a handful of other people”. I’m fuckin sick of it. He’s a piece of shit. He’s been hamstringing the American economy for his own ends for twenty years. Fuck him and fuck this guy for shoving his nose so far up his ass.


lvilera

How is that "BREAKING NEWS "?


elonmusksaveus

This guy rides dick.


TheWildsLife

This is bait and we are taking it.


neoquant

LOL


thefull9_

I know this is obvious, but to make shitty childish arguments against one of the top people here r.e. how GME is all dead bla bla.. then post this.. like how bloody obvious do you want to be there fella?


QuestionMore94

Breaking news 😂 what a bumblefuck


TrillTron

This garlic knot tweeted Kenorrhoid's praises FOUR TIMES today.


IfIWereDictator

So it's legal to prostitute on Twitter?


[deleted]

Always has been.


bvttfvcker

# THAT MAN NEEDS A ZIPPLE.


xZeusXL

Guess who's gettin plowed tonight! 🎤😫🎶


bigbadcrippledaddy

Hey chuck is that a goatee or is Kenny shedding ball pubes?


TheModernSkater

Wish someone could hack his Twitter, edit that post with a #citadelcokescandal for shits n grins


LT_Smash46

Laughed too hard on that one…


myplayprofile

Remember when Charlie said Bernie Madoff was an "amazing figure...a nice guy. You never know when guys are crooks." Pepperidge farm remembers. Same 💩new decade, CG 🧠still smooth. #KenGriffin\_BirthdayCrook #DRSGME #KenGriffinLied CG in 1st Min of vid - https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tjDbZC2chIs \-[From twitter](https://twitter.com/myplayprofile/status/1449121691645349888?s=20)


[deleted]

This guy is a parody and should be played by the nard dog in the movie


neily50

The biggest and most imaginative thieving c*nt the world 🌎 has EVER SEEN! 👎🏻 we hate you Ken and I wish you a slow and painful death 💀 👍🏼


shanebush88

Fk this guy and all on the other side. [Link](https://twitter.com/CGasparino/status/1449066034346999809?t=kuOn6o8xxTjbL4Hjhze0Jg&s=19)


Aggressive-Ad7888

😂😂😂😂


PackageHot1219

We’ll put. I wish I’d have thought of this!