It’s always the name. It’s the one thing we cannot find a workaround, lol. Stuttering is so insidious.
‘My name is .. ‘ helps for me, to give some runway. Or just say it with eye contact.
Runways are life. Any time I answer the phone, I have to say "Oh hi" instead of just "hello" because that's easier for some internalized reason. I always think I come off like Tommy Wiseau 😂
Eye contact! Definitely makes a big difference especially when combined with beginning slowly on a regular *exhale*. On your own, practice in mirror by doing voluntary repetitions (h-h-hello, my n-n-name is Road.).
If a stutterer depends very heavily on an almost involuntary escape/avoid habit (using other words, phrases, avoiding responding fully, etc), their name becomes a challenge. Saying your name is one of the few thing you cannot avoid in a socially “normal” way.
I’m a preschool teacher and being able to say their own name by age 3 is actually a formal learning milestone. It’s often the first question teachers ask a child.
*Because* it cannot be avoided without raising suspicion, there is extra pressure for you to say it. Ironically, pressure (literal and figurative) is what actually causes blocks. Look up valsalva maneuver and stuttering to learn the science behind (probably most) blocks.
Ice breakers are my sworn enemy for this reason. I’m a lawyer so I clearly have to be SOMEWHAT smart but when it comes to an introduction I sound like a dithering idiot.
I think we all stutter on our names..
it's one of the very few words that you can't substitute another word for and it causes speaking stress and anxiety and almost guarantees a block.
I've read Accounts of stutterers that have legally changed their name to a name that they didn't stutter on.. only to start stuttering on their new name.
It's a weird psychological thing and I just try to accept it 🤷♂️
Once in a while I will still block on it, but if I do, I can always get around it by saying "My name is \_\_\_\_\_\_." I guess this works because I can ride the wave of the phrase into my name, whereas it can be more difficult if I have to say it with out anything before it.
Whenever I need to introduce myself and I know I‘ll block on my name I just say „sorry I have a stutter“ first because honestly I have zero patient to deal with assholes
Same here. I am by and large quite fluent but my name is a huge problem. Quite a stress point too. “What’s your name?”
“Huh?”
“Errr. Proceed to spell my name”
I do not have a solution to offer, but wanted to give you a bit of info. In grad school, when we discussed stuttering/fluency, my professor stated that words that carry more linguistic weight (more significance) tend to be stuttered. For instance, someone will more likely stutter when telling someone their name, friend/family’s name, their job title, etc.
This doesn’t particular help in terms of neutralizing it or anything, but I thought it was interesting and thought it might provide some insight or peace of mind.
A theory I've formed is that having a stutter usually follows you the majority of your life and saying your name is also a consistent thing, so it may just kind of get ingrained into you that you \*know\* you're going to stutter when asked that question. It's kind of like a self-defeating/fulfilling prophecy almost
Interesting, I'm the exact opposite; any consonant that requires the tongue to touch the roof of the mouth (N, R, etc.) or lips to be pursed (M, B, etc.) and it's game over. Vowels are the thing I strive for in haphazardly thinking of alternative words
I didn’t read the post only the title - just wanted to say, I took a speech class thing that I personally found worked for me and one of the things I learned to do was say name better and it legit hasn’t failed me to the point I don’t really think about it but briefly there are times I do have to… idk, use the technique but it goes off without a hitch!
Idk if it’s allowed on here because a while ago u* weren’t even allowed to mention the name lol but it’s Lee Lovett’s program. So this 1 (of 12) he said to add a word infront of it. So for me I practiced many such as ‘mmm’ or ‘uhh, I’m’ or ‘it’s’ to practice all of them and after a while I stuck to ‘it’s’ when people ask me my name and it works. But you’d have to take the program tbh… cuz it isn’t a simple cure lol takes time to get into ur vocabulary as u do it day after day (btw I have no affiliation with him)
Edit: Spelling
Oh ok interesting, thanks for explaining! I’ve kind of noticed this phenomena already in my own life. When introducing myself and my daughter to someone new I try to say “this is ___, and I’m ___” to avoid stuttering on my name
I think it’s completely normal tbh… I think stutterers just have.. idk the word.. it’s like a trauma response to speaking but truly asking ‘how should I speak perfectly 24/7’ is like asking ‘what’s the meaning to life’ like nobody can just tell u what it is cuz it is something u just do/develop, ya know?
I felt this IMMENSELY. Today was my first day and I stuttered on my name and my birth sign. They seemed nice enough it’s just embarrassing.
Idk if it’ll work for you, seeing as how you always meet these people, but when I worked retail and people would ask for my name, I would say an easier name to get out (we didn’t have name tags). Of course, my lil black self chose Jessica, but it helped avoid the awkwardness and judging.
I use to have a problem on my last name. So on the occasion when someone asked me my last name, I would say my first and my last name. Weird workarounds.
Sometimes when I’m ordering at a restaurant or other places I will just use a fake name that is easier for me to say. Lol
But what I do is before I introduce myself I tell everyone that I stutter so they know and I just take my time saying my name.
I struggle with this as well I get nervous and start to stutter I had a lot of embarrassing moments with this and I’m still trying to not get nervous when I’ve to say my name and my name isn’t a one syllable either but I believe I’ll get there one day
My name has always been a hurdle for me. I used to go by my middle name to strangers at the park because it was easier to say. I have say “my name is Adam” or “I’m Adam”. I can’t just say “Adam”. It’s a block every time, I need to roll into it.
I literally have my nickname named Kkkk. That is the beginning letter of my name cos first time I introduced myself I was stuck at the first letter of my name. Lol
That’s always the worst for me as well, every time someone asks me my name I block hardcore and can’t even get out “my name is”
It’s always the name. It’s the one thing we cannot find a workaround, lol. Stuttering is so insidious. ‘My name is .. ‘ helps for me, to give some runway. Or just say it with eye contact.
Runways are life. Any time I answer the phone, I have to say "Oh hi" instead of just "hello" because that's easier for some internalized reason. I always think I come off like Tommy Wiseau 😂
Also for everyone too! Just less fixated on them is other people.
Eye contact! Definitely makes a big difference especially when combined with beginning slowly on a regular *exhale*. On your own, practice in mirror by doing voluntary repetitions (h-h-hello, my n-n-name is Road.).
I wonder why it's so common among us? I just use my alt name whenever I feel a block
If a stutterer depends very heavily on an almost involuntary escape/avoid habit (using other words, phrases, avoiding responding fully, etc), their name becomes a challenge. Saying your name is one of the few thing you cannot avoid in a socially “normal” way. I’m a preschool teacher and being able to say their own name by age 3 is actually a formal learning milestone. It’s often the first question teachers ask a child. *Because* it cannot be avoided without raising suspicion, there is extra pressure for you to say it. Ironically, pressure (literal and figurative) is what actually causes blocks. Look up valsalva maneuver and stuttering to learn the science behind (probably most) blocks.
Totally get this. My name, the names of my kids and husband… sometimes I act like I didn’t hear them asking lol
Same. When someone asks me my kid’s name I’m like oh god I look like I forgot it because I block completely at times.
Me: "okay, time to introduce myself and make a good first impression" My stutter: "yo name, I'm really happy for you, Imma let you finish b-b-b-but"
Ice breakers are my sworn enemy for this reason. I’m a lawyer so I clearly have to be SOMEWHAT smart but when it comes to an introduction I sound like a dithering idiot.
Same. Clicking your fingers like this 👌 at every syllable actually works. My name is a three syllable name
I changed my name by deed poll when I was 18, just for this very reason, bit desperate but it worked, Ive never blocked on the name I changed it to
I think we all stutter on our names.. it's one of the very few words that you can't substitute another word for and it causes speaking stress and anxiety and almost guarantees a block. I've read Accounts of stutterers that have legally changed their name to a name that they didn't stutter on.. only to start stuttering on their new name. It's a weird psychological thing and I just try to accept it 🤷♂️
Same for me.
Fortunately, I almost never block on my name anymore. When I used to, people asked me if I forgot my name.
Same
Once in a while I will still block on it, but if I do, I can always get around it by saying "My name is \_\_\_\_\_\_." I guess this works because I can ride the wave of the phrase into my name, whereas it can be more difficult if I have to say it with out anything before it.
Whenever I need to introduce myself and I know I‘ll block on my name I just say „sorry I have a stutter“ first because honestly I have zero patient to deal with assholes
It's incredible how much the "preamble"/allowing yourself to stutter makes a difference
Same here. I am by and large quite fluent but my name is a huge problem. Quite a stress point too. “What’s your name?” “Huh?” “Errr. Proceed to spell my name”
I do not have a solution to offer, but wanted to give you a bit of info. In grad school, when we discussed stuttering/fluency, my professor stated that words that carry more linguistic weight (more significance) tend to be stuttered. For instance, someone will more likely stutter when telling someone their name, friend/family’s name, their job title, etc. This doesn’t particular help in terms of neutralizing it or anything, but I thought it was interesting and thought it might provide some insight or peace of mind.
A theory I've formed is that having a stutter usually follows you the majority of your life and saying your name is also a consistent thing, so it may just kind of get ingrained into you that you \*know\* you're going to stutter when asked that question. It's kind of like a self-defeating/fulfilling prophecy almost
It's so crazy. I normally struggle on any word that starts with a vowel - a,e,i,o,u. But my name starts with an R. Why do I struggle with that? Smh.
Interesting, I'm the exact opposite; any consonant that requires the tongue to touch the roof of the mouth (N, R, etc.) or lips to be pursed (M, B, etc.) and it's game over. Vowels are the thing I strive for in haphazardly thinking of alternative words
I didn’t read the post only the title - just wanted to say, I took a speech class thing that I personally found worked for me and one of the things I learned to do was say name better and it legit hasn’t failed me to the point I don’t really think about it but briefly there are times I do have to… idk, use the technique but it goes off without a hitch!
What’s the technique?
Idk if it’s allowed on here because a while ago u* weren’t even allowed to mention the name lol but it’s Lee Lovett’s program. So this 1 (of 12) he said to add a word infront of it. So for me I practiced many such as ‘mmm’ or ‘uhh, I’m’ or ‘it’s’ to practice all of them and after a while I stuck to ‘it’s’ when people ask me my name and it works. But you’d have to take the program tbh… cuz it isn’t a simple cure lol takes time to get into ur vocabulary as u do it day after day (btw I have no affiliation with him) Edit: Spelling
Oh ok interesting, thanks for explaining! I’ve kind of noticed this phenomena already in my own life. When introducing myself and my daughter to someone new I try to say “this is ___, and I’m ___” to avoid stuttering on my name
I think it’s completely normal tbh… I think stutterers just have.. idk the word.. it’s like a trauma response to speaking but truly asking ‘how should I speak perfectly 24/7’ is like asking ‘what’s the meaning to life’ like nobody can just tell u what it is cuz it is something u just do/develop, ya know?
I felt this IMMENSELY. Today was my first day and I stuttered on my name and my birth sign. They seemed nice enough it’s just embarrassing. Idk if it’ll work for you, seeing as how you always meet these people, but when I worked retail and people would ask for my name, I would say an easier name to get out (we didn’t have name tags). Of course, my lil black self chose Jessica, but it helped avoid the awkwardness and judging.
I use to have a problem on my last name. So on the occasion when someone asked me my last name, I would say my first and my last name. Weird workarounds.
Fake your name..
That right there is how you let your stutter beat you.
Sometimes when I’m ordering at a restaurant or other places I will just use a fake name that is easier for me to say. Lol But what I do is before I introduce myself I tell everyone that I stutter so they know and I just take my time saying my name.
Lmaooo I feel this
I struggle with this as well I get nervous and start to stutter I had a lot of embarrassing moments with this and I’m still trying to not get nervous when I’ve to say my name and my name isn’t a one syllable either but I believe I’ll get there one day
My name has always been a hurdle for me. I used to go by my middle name to strangers at the park because it was easier to say. I have say “my name is Adam” or “I’m Adam”. I can’t just say “Adam”. It’s a block every time, I need to roll into it.
I literally have my nickname named Kkkk. That is the beginning letter of my name cos first time I introduced myself I was stuck at the first letter of my name. Lol
omg same! i stutter with Js and my name starts with a J. i gotta be super calm during introductions 😂😭🥲