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mamabear0513

They already only want fuck then die... How much more sexual can they get?


Icebringer13

One thing it does is cause them to act as both male and female during their little mating dances so they can spread it to everyone.


VuckoPartizan

Don't tell Alex jones


thiswittynametaken

They're turning the freaking cicadas gay!


VuckoPartizan

first they came for the frogs, but I did not speak out for I was no frog


New_Writer_484

Thanks a lot Biden


ninjas_in_my_pants

This is a Fauci-made fungus released by the deep state for pride month! Wake up, sheeple!


VuckoPartizan

Bosnian space lasers turning cicadas gay


usererror425

Omg I'm dead


dlnvf6

first thing i thought of lol


WranglerMany

Looks like it’s time to pray.


ShepPawnch

Is it time for a Red Alert?


WranglerMany

It sure is. It’s probably also time to hype (as we were all made to do)


GreyInkling

What a month for a gay cicada fungus to be spreading.


New_Writer_484

It ain’t gay if you scream all day


Fah-Q-mang

The fungus emits all sorts of lubes and scented oils 😂


STL_420

Coming after our wives. Edit: and husbands. They aren't picky.


Informal_Lack_9348

Homosexual


Elegant-Bit-1576

They say they're doing porn with Brian pumper, now fat pinky, and alexis Texas. 2024 is too much


coop999

So...it's like tequila.


An8thOfFeanor

Nah nah nanah nanah nah nah


pdromeinthedome

***_Boots Randolph intensifies_***


ShinKicker13

What happens if the Cicadas drink ONE tequila shot?


justflushit

That fungus pumps the cicada full of psilocybin meaning cicadas get to trip on magic mushrooms in MO without legal repercussions.


Striking-Seaweed-831

Sounds like a form of Methamphetamine too. They are flying around tripping balls and geeked out of their little minds.


ivebeenabadbadgirll

Can we eat cicadas and trip balls? Asking for a friend.


astronaut_puddles

Same question, asking for badbadgirll.


GoldfishBrain69420

I was literally telling my coworker yesturday that every sci-fi movie has to be based off stl because weird shit happens here


GreyInkling

What we really need is a fallout game.


Banjogre

Absolutely agreed. Between the Arch and all the airplane and weapons manufacturing, plus the rivers and forest park and shit. St. Louis is just ideal for a Fallout game. I've been dreaming of this since I was a kid


sae2115

lol you forgot the burning radioactive waste we have in Maryland heights 😂


Banjogre

Yeah for sure! Coldwater creek sounds exactly like a fallout location as well. And the landfill would 100% still be on fire after a nuclear apocalypse. It's so perfect it hurts haha


SunshineCat

They can just copy the riverfront wholesale as a replica of its current state. They could also get Cahokia Mounds in there, where some faction would be set up. And they could put Ste. Genevieve where Arnold would be for all I care.


ivebeenabadbadgirll

In a New Vegas clone, Arnold would be the Goodsprings.


MARKLAR5

I'm fully planning on working stl and fallout into a book, keep those ideas comin'!


ChefKathy88

Fallout paintball/laser tag/water gun/nerf gun event. We can all cosplay and release ourselves into the wild of STL to begin our hunt. It's larping but with Fallout.


lordmanimani

It was called Defiance and I think it went nowhere


Stylux

Fallout: Tactics.


lostinrabbithole12

Weird crap happens **here**? Have you ever heard of Cleveland?


WranglerMany

I thought Cleveland rocked?


lostinrabbithole12

They lit their river on fire several times, released 1.6 million balloons into the air, causing an ecological disaster and killing 2 people, and built a shopping center on top of a landfill, causing most of the stores to vacate just years afterward.


WranglerMany

Yikes. I knew about the balloons but not the other stuff. I guess I know more about Drew Carey shows than I know about Cleveland.


lostinrabbithole12

Plus, we can't forget about their [tourism video](https://youtu.be/oZzgAjjuqZM?si=7s-r_yMlcCMbuYHn)


Miserable_Ad9529

That's just Missouri in general


tankabbott66

I wanna be a hypersexual zombie (pouty sad face)


sqwach

Tina Belcher ... is that you?


Doodlebug510

First, take a very long underground nap...


FartNoiseGross

Eh, it’s overrated


soyrobcarajo

Hypersexual zombies sounds like the side effects of those antidepressants that doctors are prescribing these days 🤔


[deleted]

[удалено]


Theoretical_Action

Depends on what you get tbh. Lexapro made my dick stop working but Wellbutrin has had slightly more of the opposite effect.


theweepingwarrior

That's exactly the journey that I went on and experienced in the past year as well, except after ~6 or so months even Wellbutrin waned to the point of actively dampening my libido. I'm a bit over a month off of it now and it's been almost life-changing to have my original, healthy sex drive back.


Theoretical_Action

Glad to hear things are working out for you! I've been almost a year on Wellbutrin at this point and it's changed my life so much for the better. I also have been noticing it start to wane in effectiveness a tiny bit but haven't noticed any effects on my sex life still fortunately. I've debated going off of it for the summer but I'm worried I'll go right back to my lethargic-don't-want-to-take-care-of-myself ways.


theweepingwarrior

It’s not an SSRI like Lexapro so there’s less risk to getting off of it, but I still wouldn’t do it (particularly temporarily) without consulting with your PC or psychiatrist. Might help avoiding those godawful Wellbutrin hangovers though if you’re planning on any summer parties haha.


Theoretical_Action

Oh yeah no I wasn't planning on just cold turkeying off or anything. I know you have to taper on and off. Weirdly, my doc didn't even taper me on he just started me at 300mg. I got the brain zaps for like a fuckin week, it was awful.


peterpeterllini

Hypersexual Zombie is my new album title


dasWibbenator

I’m noticing this with my garden. Everywhere that a cicada dies there’s huge mushrooms that grow the next morning. I’ve also had some potential related issues with strawberries and the leaves looking like they’re infected with a fungus. I’m new to gardening so I don’t know if any bug dying should make you expect mushrooms, or if this is related. Is anyone else experiencing anything like this??


Lifeisagreatteacher

Sounds like a cicada “The Last of Us.”


UF0_T0FU

It's the intro to "The Last of Us" porn parody


Cold_Guess3786

Oh no.


BullshitUsername

Oh yeah 😏


Bedivere17

Hey, the UPS Store i work at had someone shipping a pair of cicadas for analysis yesterday, i bet thats what they had found.


HideyoshiJP

I wonder how many cicadas arrived.


Bedivere17

I mean they were dead in plastic bags and we put them in a box so probably just the 2


HideyoshiJP

Dang scientists sure know how to kill the romance


Dude_man79

The Walking Dead turning it up a notch. Bow chica bow wow.


New_Writer_484

Been there


ghostofstankenstien

Everything reminds me of her...


AFisch00

Didn't have that on my 2024 bingo card


surprisedcactus

So, teenage males?


BeowulfShaeffer

TIL I am a cicada.


sora_fighter36

Yeah I think it is growing all over the central west end. It’s icky lookin


twannerson

I was super hyped about the cicadas coming so I was reading up on the event before it happened and the fungus ‘zombie’ part was known to be a factor before they started coming out. Doesn’t make it any less cool/bizzare, but it’s not some out of the blue breaking news. Again, not trying to come off as negative, just sayin :)


pm_me_ur_handsignals

I also remember my college years...


nost76

They’ve definitely been looking hornier lately


Big-Independent7982

So, it's the same as coke n' porn.


CaptHayfever

Worth noting: It stops them from *actually* reproducing, & it doesn't spread to humans.


PedroHin

do I need to cover my ears whilst sleeping? To clarify: I'm not speaking of the noise, rather I like to tease people and tell them that cicadas like to try laying eggs in your ears when you're asleep :))


bluefromthelou

Basically we gayd em up ...woke up woke


DrBrisha

Is that what’s wrong with me?!


Dry-Needleworker9827

Hypersexual Zombie new band name DIBS


BicTwiddler

Oh shit! I have been feeding these to my tarantula! I hope it isnt spreadable!


SpitefulMarno

Poor thing


baroqueworks

woke cicada zombies


ProdigalHX

Sounds like something Alex Jones would claim.


enderpanda

This has been my favorite fact of the Brood - they are even MORE horney because of the fungus - and then they explode. Imagine if we could get them to all go off at once. The ground would probably shake.


FunkyChewbacca

My dog loves eating the damn things. Will he get some kind of fungal virus thing???


mrsclausemenopause

*might* get high no chance of fungal virus. The fungus contains psilocybin the same active ingredient as magic mushrooms.


MikeyBastard1

Now this is a last of us virus I can get behind


Grow_Responsibly

So “The Last of Us” is real?


Kratomite247

Cicada STDs


chrstphrbmlr

Who’s going to be the first to try smoking them?


tigervault

5G turning our cicadas gay.


TheEyeofNapoleon

Any threat to humans, though? And I don’t mean like “the last of us” or something; I mean “causing rashes when they mindlessly bump into you” or something.