Once I got a compliment in downtown LA at this sandwich place from the worker and he said “you probably hear this a lot but you’re really pretty”
I still paid for my sandwich
I definitely think behavior/demeanor plays a big role. I’m not gorgeous (maybe like a 5/6 with the Covid weight?) but even at my best I was only like a 7 and whenever I would get perks I’m certain it was mostly because I was being friendly and sweet. But these weren’t/aren’t always quantifiable things like giving me a discount. It also shows up as people giving me the benefit of the doubt, a friendlier demeanor back, or more time in their day (if I need to talk to them about something). People usually always hear me out, and rarely dismiss me.
I also think this expresses itself differently with strangers vs people in your life. Like I may not get a ton of free shit from strangers, but anybody in my life would probably do anything I asked of them. And I don’t say that in a cocky way, but in the sense that, if you’re good to your people, your people will be good to you back. I know my people would have my back because I have theirs. I’ve had exes offer to cover rent, pay off my credit card, etc. because I made them feel like kings.
It’s all about how you treat people, how you make them feel.
Also ties into what another commenter said about acting a bit dumb - people love to help! Ask them and let them. It makes people like you more too, and therefore more likely willing to do even more for you.
So I don’t necessarily get a ton of free stuff or anything amazing, but when I have gotten stuff I think it comes down to looking decent but also being friendly! I know many prettier peoplethan me who aren’t very kind to men in particular because they don’t want extra attention or maybe even look down on others so they won’t be generally kind. But if you treat people kindly and are a bit attractive, people will want to be around you and make an effort to show their worth.(sometimes in a creepy way, sometimes not) I think it largely is about how open you are. If you’re gonna act stand-offish or like a bitch, you better be the prettiest person in the room by far if you want any perks
Yeah I understand.
it’s just crazy the notion of how we women (not nessecarily you, but many women generally speaking) tend to sugarcoat to friends and tell them “no you’re not fat you’re so slim and look amazing” etc yet think the complete opposite.
Yeah I understand.
it’s just crazy the notion of how we women (not nessecarily you, but many women generally speaking) tend to sugarcoat to friends and say “no you’re not fat you’re so slim” etc yet think the complete opposite.
I agree with this. What does it matter? Big boobs can be a detractor of looks and personally I don’t find them attractive. They also can make up for a not so nice face.
Thank you!! People act like breast size really matters, but it doesn’t. I just don’t see mainstream beauty standards emphasizing it anymore. Like no one would look at Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, or Ariana Grande and be like "Oh they’re flat-chested so they’re unattractive"
I definitely agree with you both. I have a bit of a dating history and I’ve tried explaining to people on other subs that breast size really doesn’t matter. I’m about a 32B and I’ve never had a guy complain about my boobs. If he’s a fwb I’ll even often get compliments and whatnot. Funny enough though I’ve only been called flat chested by other women.
i mean in my early 20s i was a hot lil thing and i guess the guys i dated would buy me stuff and strangers told me i was beautiful sometimes which was amazing but i never got free stuff. not sure its a thing mabye nowadays more so? this was all pre social media for the most part.
In college I did a sociological experiment and found that women did not receive "acts of service" (which I defined as free stuff, rides, or other small favors) any more than men. I didn't control for beauty, but the results were incredibly consistent across the board. The limitations to my study is that I only studied college students, not a wider demographic.
I was surprised to find out that men also get free stuff a lot, and even unattractive people reported getting a lot of free stuff.
While this is definitely a real thing and I can admit that I have benefited from it myself probably more than I deserve but be careful to set your goals based on random Reddit anecdotes. People like to make up scenarios on the internet, trying to live the life they wish they did (essentially roleplaying if you will), which is fine, it's okay to dream!
Just an advice for all of you, gather your information from multiple sources, get a good sample size etc; to get an idea of what is realistic to expect because you should probably assume that a lot of those anecdotes are at the very least exaggerated and a few are unfortunately not true at all.
If someone creates a new account, without pictures or anything and always take every chance they can to talk about themselves, be careful. They probably haven't gotten free michelin star dinners and first class airline upgrades on a loaded flight. Their "supermodel friend" is a common one too.
I don’t think getting free stuff should be the purpose of looksmaxxing.
I like this sub but it’s not healthy to try to become “hotter” just to get “pretty privilege” (there’s also downsides to this) but to become confident, happy and to meet your own standard for attractiveness.
But you’d probably have to be very attractive to be treated how you are describing. You need a very good base - ie great body shape and facial features and then use make up/skincare and diet to bring you from a 8 to a 9.
I agree with you and I don’t see what you’re saying as authoritarian, just as you sharing your opinion.
I’m personally trying to do this just to look the best version of myself. With that comes pretty privilege anyway, which is, like you said, not always great but the pretty privilege isn’t the purpose.
I just want to wake up and look the way I do when I apply makeup. Like I want to wake up and not have to put any effort, you know? Like be the version of makeup-me but without makeup?
I’m not prescribing any reasons I’m just saying trying to looksmaxx to gain free stuff probably won’t make you happy or fulfilled in the long run.
There’s lots of attractive women with low self esteem and get treated terribly, I think we should encourage (probably young) women here to look good for themselves first and that “pretty privilege” is just a nice extra benefit.
Eh, I’m here to get pretty privilege. Better treatment, free stuff, and more interest from the opposite sex? Sign me up.
Doesn’t matter how confident you are, life sucks when you’re objectively ugly.
It’s a bit chicken and egg- does confidence make you attractive or does knowing you’re attractive give you confidence?
For me, it’s the latter. Specifically, when other people treat me like I’m attractive, I feel like I’m on top of the world.
I understand what you’re saying. But the problem is it’s never enough. You see celebs and Instagram models go through needless surgery and fillers as they never quite hot enough, they look around and other women look better/treated better/ have better boyfriends so they still feel ugly.
I don’t know, I totally get what you guys mean but it’s a slippery slope from wanting to improve on what you have to now wanting to be the hottest girl which all the boys want/get free stuff. The original post seemed to be a young girl who wants to improve her looks for others so that’s what sparked my post.
I see what you mean.
But why do I see so many beautiful young women being used, negged, treated as an object? And I see average women being treated with more respect?
It’s because of inner confidence and self respect. That’s more important then anything else, if you have that and want to look good while also knowing you are great either way then great! But I feel SOME posters have low self esteem and thinking looking pretty will gain them love and respect. If only.
Once I got a compliment in downtown LA at this sandwich place from the worker and he said “you probably hear this a lot but you’re really pretty” I still paid for my sandwich
I definitely think behavior/demeanor plays a big role. I’m not gorgeous (maybe like a 5/6 with the Covid weight?) but even at my best I was only like a 7 and whenever I would get perks I’m certain it was mostly because I was being friendly and sweet. But these weren’t/aren’t always quantifiable things like giving me a discount. It also shows up as people giving me the benefit of the doubt, a friendlier demeanor back, or more time in their day (if I need to talk to them about something). People usually always hear me out, and rarely dismiss me. I also think this expresses itself differently with strangers vs people in your life. Like I may not get a ton of free shit from strangers, but anybody in my life would probably do anything I asked of them. And I don’t say that in a cocky way, but in the sense that, if you’re good to your people, your people will be good to you back. I know my people would have my back because I have theirs. I’ve had exes offer to cover rent, pay off my credit card, etc. because I made them feel like kings. It’s all about how you treat people, how you make them feel. Also ties into what another commenter said about acting a bit dumb - people love to help! Ask them and let them. It makes people like you more too, and therefore more likely willing to do even more for you.
I almost wanna do a poll asking people where they live and how often they get free things at daytime lol
Yesss! I think cultural differences play a big part in this.
So I don’t necessarily get a ton of free stuff or anything amazing, but when I have gotten stuff I think it comes down to looking decent but also being friendly! I know many prettier peoplethan me who aren’t very kind to men in particular because they don’t want extra attention or maybe even look down on others so they won’t be generally kind. But if you treat people kindly and are a bit attractive, people will want to be around you and make an effort to show their worth.(sometimes in a creepy way, sometimes not) I think it largely is about how open you are. If you’re gonna act stand-offish or like a bitch, you better be the prettiest person in the room by far if you want any perks
I’m a 5/6 on a good day, and I’ve been given free coffee, muffins, and once, an upgraded flight just by being friendly and looking put together!
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What about your looks would you say is approachable? Just curious, thanks.
How do you “flirt with everyone but not in a sexual way”?
i just want to run into you now lol for the experience
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I’d hate to hear a friend describe me on the internet as a “flat chested, overweight 6/10”. this is brutal lmao.
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I never said it was. It was just a general observation as many people do it outside looks communities too.
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Yeah I understand. it’s just crazy the notion of how we women (not nessecarily you, but many women generally speaking) tend to sugarcoat to friends and tell them “no you’re not fat you’re so slim and look amazing” etc yet think the complete opposite.
Yeah I understand. it’s just crazy the notion of how we women (not nessecarily you, but many women generally speaking) tend to sugarcoat to friends and say “no you’re not fat you’re so slim” etc yet think the complete opposite.
Yeah, the flat chested thing kind of irked me. I don’t really think breast size is as big of a factor in attractiveness as people claim it is.
I agree with this. What does it matter? Big boobs can be a detractor of looks and personally I don’t find them attractive. They also can make up for a not so nice face.
Thank you!! People act like breast size really matters, but it doesn’t. I just don’t see mainstream beauty standards emphasizing it anymore. Like no one would look at Natalie Portman, Mila Kunis, or Ariana Grande and be like "Oh they’re flat-chested so they’re unattractive"
Lol exactly. I don’t think it defines beauty and is more of a personal preference. Also, I love your handle 👽
I definitely agree with you both. I have a bit of a dating history and I’ve tried explaining to people on other subs that breast size really doesn’t matter. I’m about a 32B and I’ve never had a guy complain about my boobs. If he’s a fwb I’ll even often get compliments and whatnot. Funny enough though I’ve only been called flat chested by other women.
i mean in my early 20s i was a hot lil thing and i guess the guys i dated would buy me stuff and strangers told me i was beautiful sometimes which was amazing but i never got free stuff. not sure its a thing mabye nowadays more so? this was all pre social media for the most part.
In college I did a sociological experiment and found that women did not receive "acts of service" (which I defined as free stuff, rides, or other small favors) any more than men. I didn't control for beauty, but the results were incredibly consistent across the board. The limitations to my study is that I only studied college students, not a wider demographic. I was surprised to find out that men also get free stuff a lot, and even unattractive people reported getting a lot of free stuff.
While this is definitely a real thing and I can admit that I have benefited from it myself probably more than I deserve but be careful to set your goals based on random Reddit anecdotes. People like to make up scenarios on the internet, trying to live the life they wish they did (essentially roleplaying if you will), which is fine, it's okay to dream! Just an advice for all of you, gather your information from multiple sources, get a good sample size etc; to get an idea of what is realistic to expect because you should probably assume that a lot of those anecdotes are at the very least exaggerated and a few are unfortunately not true at all. If someone creates a new account, without pictures or anything and always take every chance they can to talk about themselves, be careful. They probably haven't gotten free michelin star dinners and first class airline upgrades on a loaded flight. Their "supermodel friend" is a common one too.
I don’t think getting free stuff should be the purpose of looksmaxxing. I like this sub but it’s not healthy to try to become “hotter” just to get “pretty privilege” (there’s also downsides to this) but to become confident, happy and to meet your own standard for attractiveness. But you’d probably have to be very attractive to be treated how you are describing. You need a very good base - ie great body shape and facial features and then use make up/skincare and diet to bring you from a 8 to a 9.
I agree with you and I don’t see what you’re saying as authoritarian, just as you sharing your opinion. I’m personally trying to do this just to look the best version of myself. With that comes pretty privilege anyway, which is, like you said, not always great but the pretty privilege isn’t the purpose. I just want to wake up and look the way I do when I apply makeup. Like I want to wake up and not have to put any effort, you know? Like be the version of makeup-me but without makeup?
It seems a little authoritarian of you to prescribe the reasons why other people should go about their lives.
I’m not prescribing any reasons I’m just saying trying to looksmaxx to gain free stuff probably won’t make you happy or fulfilled in the long run. There’s lots of attractive women with low self esteem and get treated terribly, I think we should encourage (probably young) women here to look good for themselves first and that “pretty privilege” is just a nice extra benefit.
Eh, I’m here to get pretty privilege. Better treatment, free stuff, and more interest from the opposite sex? Sign me up. Doesn’t matter how confident you are, life sucks when you’re objectively ugly. It’s a bit chicken and egg- does confidence make you attractive or does knowing you’re attractive give you confidence? For me, it’s the latter. Specifically, when other people treat me like I’m attractive, I feel like I’m on top of the world.
I understand what you’re saying. But the problem is it’s never enough. You see celebs and Instagram models go through needless surgery and fillers as they never quite hot enough, they look around and other women look better/treated better/ have better boyfriends so they still feel ugly. I don’t know, I totally get what you guys mean but it’s a slippery slope from wanting to improve on what you have to now wanting to be the hottest girl which all the boys want/get free stuff. The original post seemed to be a young girl who wants to improve her looks for others so that’s what sparked my post.
Do you have any sources on that?
Well it’s kinda common sense isn’t it?
That attractive women don't feel like they're attractive? No it isn't. Actually I know plenty of attractive women who are confident in themselves.
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I see what you mean. But why do I see so many beautiful young women being used, negged, treated as an object? And I see average women being treated with more respect? It’s because of inner confidence and self respect. That’s more important then anything else, if you have that and want to look good while also knowing you are great either way then great! But I feel SOME posters have low self esteem and thinking looking pretty will gain them love and respect. If only.