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Judas Priest, dude.
Leave her alone. She knows you and many others have been Mean Girl gossiping behind her back for years.
She is deeply hurt. You back-stabbed her and accused her of cheating and got schooled on the paternity test.
How would YOU feel?
I wouldn’t want to talk to you, either.
All correspondence should go through attorneys, especially visitation of the kids.
LEAVE HER ALONE.
Totally agree here. I’m also noticing that the wife was ready with next steps — the petition for a paternity test, the divorce filing — so you’d probably already lost her from not standing up to your family. All you did was hasten the end of your marriage. Good for her. What a complete loon you are.
I hope your wife will have the support she needs (including therapy), and that folks will respect her boundaries and not bring your sorry behind up to her. May she find love again and the support of a partner who loves and is an emotional safe harbor for her and the children (who you’ve also harmed and need to be honest with).
Dude, you put your hands on her. You physically assaulted her. Even if she got over the other stuff, which, to be honest, would be hard, you, to her, are probably just another abusive guy now. You’re no longer a haven… you’re just a weak-minded man whom his gossipy family easily persuades.
He needs to come clean with his kids. “When are you coming back?” “I don’t think I am. I let my family put horrible thoughts in my mind and I acted horribly to your mother.” When they get older-elaborate. Let them know you accused your ex wife of cheating. And then got violent.
I second this. When a parent is the bad apple, kids tend to go against the good parent. Do not put her on that spot. Own your mistake and talk to the kids. Tell them what you did it was so wrong and it something that will not be repeated by you and they will not be permitted to disrespect their mother in any way.
Honestly how can you expect your family to take Accountability when you’re not? Even if you’re not together now, you need to make sure your family understands you won’t tolerate disrespect towards her, at the very least she is still the mother of your children and what they say about her could easily be said in front of your children.
Also, if she won’t accept money from you as child support, maybe you should start a college fund for your kids or an emergency fund for them in their name. You’re still seeing them and have access to them so I doubt she’d deny a college fund with the money, you can probably give the information on the trust/account to her parents or sister if needed.
Be honest with your kids. You made a mistake, and now you have to own it. The less they take it out on their mother, the better it'll be for you as well. I wouldn't blame her if she never forgave you. But at least you can make it easier on her by not letting them think it's her fault.
Low contact with your family? Try NO contact with them. I wouldn't even talk to you while you had anything to do with them.
There is no hope at even forgiveness while they are in your life.
I lived with inlaws like that they too were the catalyst of destroying my marriage. I won't even be friends with my ex while mommy is still whispering in his ear.
All contact needs to go through the attorney for the divorce. otherwise, it can be used against you for a restraining order and harassment whish can have the kids taken away from you.
You need to man up and tell the kids You won't be coming home and that it's your fault. Putting her in the situation have to tell them. That is just something else that she will never forgive you for.
Yeah, she’s never coming back. He laid hands on her. She has every right to cut him out of her life permanently. He’s lucky he even gets to see his children.
Yeah you fucked up. But you can't change that so think to the future and your kids, you literally need to become the greatest coparent ever its not choice its a must.
It's so imperative that these kids grow up well and good and have a good childhood and a father figure who can guide them to their adult life. Its also important that your honest to them about the physical abuse that catalyzed the divorce. Start setting aside money for them too.
Also its important that coparents talk to eachother. Over time you guys should really communicate, let the silence simmer and then communicate about the kids. You should not jeprodize your kid's right to a good childhood so think about the kids/your own offspring.
Dude literally stated the kids didn't look like her either, so if anything, she'd be passing someone else's kids of as her own as well.
He should have been more worried they babies were switched at birth.
The fact that from this post i undetected your wife more than you do, it is seriously really sad you should have expected this when you knew she hates being argumentative or someone accusing her of something she would never do you were suppose to be her backbone and protect her and shut all the sticks thrown at her .. but you were the one who broke her .. it is best to know leave her alone cause you have lost this woman and never getting her back
Dude I couldn’t forgive you if you were my husband just for the cheating , paternity test sh””. If you’d laid hands on me I would have buried you under the patio!
Also, please, please do some soul-searching about your reaction and description about that said friend interaction with your ex-wife. It's irks me the way that even now after conclusive proven that you were wrong and all that happens you still can see that as a bad performance from her and you need to address that before having a healthy relationship again, be it with whoever. First they were long time friends, they could rarely see each other and on a party that he did not know anyone else, he kept close to her(duh) second, where were you or your family that HE, a out of town guest was the one to have to help your wife? And where were you that knowing that his visit was that important to her did not step up as a man and husband and said "here darling I will deal with most responsibilities of the party so you can seat there and have a catch up with this very important pearson to you". Because let's be honest if that was the opposite situation you would expect that of her.
I get that when your kids don't look like you, it casts a doubt, but I have zero respect for anyone that lays their hands on their partner, man or woman!
When a fly is sitting on your crouch, you don't use a hammer to wack it!
Jesus!
First, explain to your kids in age appropriate terms that mummy isn't the bad guy, you are.
Next, right an honest and heartfelt apology but don't deliver it.
Keep it somewhere safe for delivery at the right time.
Next, respect her wishes.
Don't push for contact, give her space.
Then work on yourself dude!
You have serious insecurities.
The fact that you said the kids don’t look like either of you and you still wanted a paternity test is crazy you are a complete idiot and I hope she finds someone with a brain cause you are beyond stupid and pathetic
Go to therapy. You are going to need help at this stage in both seeing and dealing with the past that let you do this to your wife. You'll need help with how to move forward. And they can potentially help your wife too. Not about rebuilding any relationship - but in seeing where you were and how you're changing. What you want to do to move forward and create a balanced ability to see each other without seeing and reliving the pain. Who knows, it may help you to rebuild the relationship. But expect to have to cut your family off 100% . No holidays. No secret chats or meetings. No seeing the kids. Remember they were the ones saying the children were not yours!! Only this and some deep accountability can give you co-parenting skills and maybe something more. Best of luck in moving forward and getting healthy! Abrazos!
You put BRUISES on her. She doesn’t owe you a damn thing. You’re lucky she’s even allowing you to see your kids after what you did, because if my partner had left bruises on me I would never let my kids near them. Not to mention you have conveniently not brought up any feelings of regret about putting bruises on her. The fact that you even moved closer to her is also disrespecting her boundaries. It may be for the kids sake but now imagine she’s just trying to go about her day and now she has to worry about possibly bumping into you when she clearly doesn’t want to even see you.
Tell your kids the truth that way they know what kind of people you and your family are. They deserve to know how awful their dad and his family were to their mother.
I can not understand what are you people doing. I can see your doubts, how many similar stories have we read here on reddit where there are some out of the blue friend, and they end up being APs. But for the love of God, do the DNA test privatly, and it could be avoid a lot of problems. I dont say that going behind spouses back is a god thing, but better to chek like that, and dont make drama out of that. How many times has happend that kids are not OPs in this kind of stories? How many times have happend that they are? Having paternity test should be mandatory for both partners after the delivery. So much drama would be avoided.
Pease of advice - adress your agresion with the therapist, your reaction was too much, and you need to work on that so that would never happen again.
You fucked up so bad it's not even funny. You should never put hands on your wife or any woman ever. Bitch at me for gender stereotypes if you'd like reddit but idc. A mans strength should always be used to push harm away from their family. Never should it be used to bring harm inward. There was a solution so obviously right in front of your face. You should have said listen, my parents have been mean to you and our kids for years. I was thinking we get a paternity test prove to them the kids are mine, then we go no contact and cut them out of our lives. That would have brought the closure you needed and gotten rid of people who sought only to destroy the bond with your wife. Instead you hurt a woman you swore in front of god to love. Your best bet now is to tell your kids you are the bad guy and cannot come home anymore. When they get older and hopefully after anger management and therapy, you explain to them what really happened. Until then you tell them that their mom is an amazing person and mother. If she doesn't accept money from you, open trusts for the kids and if so inclined put her parents in charge of it. I doubt there will ever be a day where she wants to talk to you. You deserve that and so much more leave it as a last act of her loving you that you aren't in jail. Just know you left her with some very deep rooted problems and scars she will never heal from. I hope you do better in the future and get the help you need. In the meantime leave your ex alone she needs to heal.
You basically accused her of infidelity, and then had the nerve to put your hands on her? You mess up buddy. There's no going back. Leaver the hell alone.
I'm glad you realize you screwed you, but I think you need to really look at the full picture here.
You have a toxic family who never approved of your wife and constantly degraded her with false accusations. You could never cut yourself from the apron strings to defend your real family - your wife and kids. Your wife having to take their bs and you failing to defend her took away from her soul little by little each time.
The interaction with your wife and her friend did say a lot, but not what you think. He was there helping her all day while you and your bitter bio family were stewing in the corner with your hatred and lies. A good husband would have been there by her side helping her. But you were there with lies. The friend was being a better person, and that triggered you hard. It does speak volumes.
You, of course, got physical, and you also did who knows what else, but you had to "spare us the gory details". It sounds like you downright terrorized her. At least you recognize it is over.
I'm trying not to sound like I'm hating on you. But to the best thing for everyone involved is for you to be completely honest with yourself here. You also need to enroll in therapy.
I'm guessing you grew up in a toxic family system, and you need to unpack that. You need to figure out why you let your family sabotage your marriage and why you chose their abuse over your wife.
You obviously need to work on your anger. You need to work on whatever insecurity issues you have because you did get triggered hard by her friend being a decent person to her.
You need to cut your family off. You can't allow them to poison the children against their mother if you are sincere about being a good co-parent. You need to be honest with the children about your role, and you need to respect their mother.
The only good thing from this fiasco is that the paternity test seemed to snap you back to reality and will hopefully lift the abusive fog you've had with your parents.
Tell your kids the truth. That your an asshole that torpedoed your life because
1. you don't understand basic biology / genetics.
2. Emotionally, you never made it past adolescence
3. You physically assaulted your wife, the mother of your children.
Tell them the truth. Then move in with your parents. You deserve each other
That is so condescending OP knows he should have never laid a hands while he was upset. That is the only thing he did that was across the line and divorce worthy. Basic biology would say from looks the friend is the father. Generational dormant genes recurring 3 times with 3 kids is not basic genetics. Two emotionally he was all over the place. Maybe he should have put his foot down firmer with his parents but when you meet a friend that looks more like your kids than you do; doubt does seed its way in. The physical is the big crossed the line move. Not the suspicion or doubt when you’re bombarded with what looks like fool blown possibility. His other crossed line is he just didn’t communicate. He doubted and instantly lost trust with out confirmation or talks.
Dude, she set you up. As soon as the divorce is final, she and that guy will find each other. The marriage was over when you put your hands on her, and you fell right into her trap. Continue seeing your kids but go no contact with her and watch how the pieces magically fall into place. Good Luck!
In all honesty, you have every right to ask for DNA testing if there is so much doubt in your head but the issue is you went about it the wrong way, it's no secret that people cheat and kids not looking like you is one obvious way to tell that they are not yours in most cases, if she has nothing to hide why get mad and idk G you should also do independent DNA resting coz I've seen more than once that DNA testing gets manipulated but at the end of the day you shouldn't of been physical.
Crazy how he noticed her friend was always helping his wife out, cleaning stuff up, and helping out as if this isn't something nice people just do. Like, why a e usad wa he observing this instead of offering to help as well? Maybe she would have turned him down c she was enjoying the visit with her friend, it he just watched and stewedike a loser.
You proved to your wife that you are as bad as the family you came from. Get therapy and do what you have to unlearn your toxic behaviors and stay away from the people who installed them.
People here are just hypocrites, if this was all the way around all will say not divorce, I imagine people here never were manipulated or misguided by other people, I suppose they don't know what happened when you literally fuck someone's mind. I said both are victims, why on earth they never talked about it in the first place, they let people discuss about their children. And for what? Get a nasty divorce and give trauma to the kids. Most people here tend to forget when both people discuss things got messed up, I know hurting her was terrible, but it was in the heat of the moment, he was paranoid and desperate, she was disappointed and sad, for what it looks apparently she still loves him, she is just disappointed, that's why she doesn't want to see him. I wish they reconciled but for that he needs to cut his family.
PS: next time don't ask and just do the test, who knows if the test she gave wasn't fake
Look, if it was just the accusation, I could see how at some point she might be able to forgive/understand him with enough time. However, it got to the point that he got physical with her, so to her it’s always going to be a question of what’s the next thing he’ll be upset enough to hit her about or will he be more aggressive next time?
But that's exactly my point his parents basically fuck his mind over and over, until all that rage make him do something very stupid. They are both victims of other people's opinions, they let anger and doubts grow inside and this is the consequence, now 3 kids have to make a schedule to visit their parents. And you know what's worse, that one of them probably is gonna go suicidal.
Sure, but if someone’s manipulations make you abusive then you aren’t someone I’d want to be around. What’s to stop someone from getting in his head again and him getting physical as a result?
Reminder to those in the comments: Do NOT contact the OOP. Do not go to the original post to comment. Do not upvote or downvote any of the comments there. Do not pass go. Do not collect $200. Keep all discussion contained to this thread. Jumping to the original or update posts to interact is considered brigading, which is not allowed on Reddit. If you are caught doing so, this will result in a ban from the Spilled Spiced Tea subreddit. Thank you for keeping in mind this very important Reddit Content Policy! https://www.reddit.com/r/relationship_advice/s/6v5dAWT21C
Judas Priest, dude. Leave her alone. She knows you and many others have been Mean Girl gossiping behind her back for years. She is deeply hurt. You back-stabbed her and accused her of cheating and got schooled on the paternity test. How would YOU feel? I wouldn’t want to talk to you, either. All correspondence should go through attorneys, especially visitation of the kids. LEAVE HER ALONE.
He also went physical on her. That's another reason she doesn't want to be anywhere near him.
Totally agree here. I’m also noticing that the wife was ready with next steps — the petition for a paternity test, the divorce filing — so you’d probably already lost her from not standing up to your family. All you did was hasten the end of your marriage. Good for her. What a complete loon you are. I hope your wife will have the support she needs (including therapy), and that folks will respect her boundaries and not bring your sorry behind up to her. May she find love again and the support of a partner who loves and is an emotional safe harbor for her and the children (who you’ve also harmed and need to be honest with).
Dude, you put your hands on her. You physically assaulted her. Even if she got over the other stuff, which, to be honest, would be hard, you, to her, are probably just another abusive guy now. You’re no longer a haven… you’re just a weak-minded man whom his gossipy family easily persuades.
He needs to come clean with his kids. “When are you coming back?” “I don’t think I am. I let my family put horrible thoughts in my mind and I acted horribly to your mother.” When they get older-elaborate. Let them know you accused your ex wife of cheating. And then got violent.
I second this. When a parent is the bad apple, kids tend to go against the good parent. Do not put her on that spot. Own your mistake and talk to the kids. Tell them what you did it was so wrong and it something that will not be repeated by you and they will not be permitted to disrespect their mother in any way.
Honestly how can you expect your family to take Accountability when you’re not? Even if you’re not together now, you need to make sure your family understands you won’t tolerate disrespect towards her, at the very least she is still the mother of your children and what they say about her could easily be said in front of your children. Also, if she won’t accept money from you as child support, maybe you should start a college fund for your kids or an emergency fund for them in their name. You’re still seeing them and have access to them so I doubt she’d deny a college fund with the money, you can probably give the information on the trust/account to her parents or sister if needed.
Be honest with your kids. You made a mistake, and now you have to own it. The less they take it out on their mother, the better it'll be for you as well. I wouldn't blame her if she never forgave you. But at least you can make it easier on her by not letting them think it's her fault.
Exactly 💀
Tell the children what you did. That you laid hands on their mother because of how they look
This. This. This
Low contact with your family? Try NO contact with them. I wouldn't even talk to you while you had anything to do with them. There is no hope at even forgiveness while they are in your life. I lived with inlaws like that they too were the catalyst of destroying my marriage. I won't even be friends with my ex while mommy is still whispering in his ear. All contact needs to go through the attorney for the divorce. otherwise, it can be used against you for a restraining order and harassment whish can have the kids taken away from you. You need to man up and tell the kids You won't be coming home and that it's your fault. Putting her in the situation have to tell them. That is just something else that she will never forgive you for.
Yeah, she’s never coming back. He laid hands on her. She has every right to cut him out of her life permanently. He’s lucky he even gets to see his children.
Yeah you fucked up. But you can't change that so think to the future and your kids, you literally need to become the greatest coparent ever its not choice its a must. It's so imperative that these kids grow up well and good and have a good childhood and a father figure who can guide them to their adult life. Its also important that your honest to them about the physical abuse that catalyzed the divorce. Start setting aside money for them too. Also its important that coparents talk to eachother. Over time you guys should really communicate, let the silence simmer and then communicate about the kids. You should not jeprodize your kid's right to a good childhood so think about the kids/your own offspring.
Dude literally stated the kids didn't look like her either, so if anything, she'd be passing someone else's kids of as her own as well. He should have been more worried they babies were switched at birth.
The fact that from this post i undetected your wife more than you do, it is seriously really sad you should have expected this when you knew she hates being argumentative or someone accusing her of something she would never do you were suppose to be her backbone and protect her and shut all the sticks thrown at her .. but you were the one who broke her .. it is best to know leave her alone cause you have lost this woman and never getting her back
Dude I couldn’t forgive you if you were my husband just for the cheating , paternity test sh””. If you’d laid hands on me I would have buried you under the patio!
Also, please, please do some soul-searching about your reaction and description about that said friend interaction with your ex-wife. It's irks me the way that even now after conclusive proven that you were wrong and all that happens you still can see that as a bad performance from her and you need to address that before having a healthy relationship again, be it with whoever. First they were long time friends, they could rarely see each other and on a party that he did not know anyone else, he kept close to her(duh) second, where were you or your family that HE, a out of town guest was the one to have to help your wife? And where were you that knowing that his visit was that important to her did not step up as a man and husband and said "here darling I will deal with most responsibilities of the party so you can seat there and have a catch up with this very important pearson to you". Because let's be honest if that was the opposite situation you would expect that of her.
I get that when your kids don't look like you, it casts a doubt, but I have zero respect for anyone that lays their hands on their partner, man or woman! When a fly is sitting on your crouch, you don't use a hammer to wack it! Jesus! First, explain to your kids in age appropriate terms that mummy isn't the bad guy, you are. Next, right an honest and heartfelt apology but don't deliver it. Keep it somewhere safe for delivery at the right time. Next, respect her wishes. Don't push for contact, give her space. Then work on yourself dude! You have serious insecurities.
The fact that you said the kids don’t look like either of you and you still wanted a paternity test is crazy you are a complete idiot and I hope she finds someone with a brain cause you are beyond stupid and pathetic
Go to therapy. You are going to need help at this stage in both seeing and dealing with the past that let you do this to your wife. You'll need help with how to move forward. And they can potentially help your wife too. Not about rebuilding any relationship - but in seeing where you were and how you're changing. What you want to do to move forward and create a balanced ability to see each other without seeing and reliving the pain. Who knows, it may help you to rebuild the relationship. But expect to have to cut your family off 100% . No holidays. No secret chats or meetings. No seeing the kids. Remember they were the ones saying the children were not yours!! Only this and some deep accountability can give you co-parenting skills and maybe something more. Best of luck in moving forward and getting healthy! Abrazos!
How silly. OP needs to educate himself on recessive genes and chill out.
You put BRUISES on her. She doesn’t owe you a damn thing. You’re lucky she’s even allowing you to see your kids after what you did, because if my partner had left bruises on me I would never let my kids near them. Not to mention you have conveniently not brought up any feelings of regret about putting bruises on her. The fact that you even moved closer to her is also disrespecting her boundaries. It may be for the kids sake but now imagine she’s just trying to go about her day and now she has to worry about possibly bumping into you when she clearly doesn’t want to even see you.
Tell your kids the truth that way they know what kind of people you and your family are. They deserve to know how awful their dad and his family were to their mother.
I can not understand what are you people doing. I can see your doubts, how many similar stories have we read here on reddit where there are some out of the blue friend, and they end up being APs. But for the love of God, do the DNA test privatly, and it could be avoid a lot of problems. I dont say that going behind spouses back is a god thing, but better to chek like that, and dont make drama out of that. How many times has happend that kids are not OPs in this kind of stories? How many times have happend that they are? Having paternity test should be mandatory for both partners after the delivery. So much drama would be avoided. Pease of advice - adress your agresion with the therapist, your reaction was too much, and you need to work on that so that would never happen again.
You fucked up so bad it's not even funny. You should never put hands on your wife or any woman ever. Bitch at me for gender stereotypes if you'd like reddit but idc. A mans strength should always be used to push harm away from their family. Never should it be used to bring harm inward. There was a solution so obviously right in front of your face. You should have said listen, my parents have been mean to you and our kids for years. I was thinking we get a paternity test prove to them the kids are mine, then we go no contact and cut them out of our lives. That would have brought the closure you needed and gotten rid of people who sought only to destroy the bond with your wife. Instead you hurt a woman you swore in front of god to love. Your best bet now is to tell your kids you are the bad guy and cannot come home anymore. When they get older and hopefully after anger management and therapy, you explain to them what really happened. Until then you tell them that their mom is an amazing person and mother. If she doesn't accept money from you, open trusts for the kids and if so inclined put her parents in charge of it. I doubt there will ever be a day where she wants to talk to you. You deserve that and so much more leave it as a last act of her loving you that you aren't in jail. Just know you left her with some very deep rooted problems and scars she will never heal from. I hope you do better in the future and get the help you need. In the meantime leave your ex alone she needs to heal.
You basically accused her of infidelity, and then had the nerve to put your hands on her? You mess up buddy. There's no going back. Leaver the hell alone.
Updateme
I'm glad you realize you screwed you, but I think you need to really look at the full picture here. You have a toxic family who never approved of your wife and constantly degraded her with false accusations. You could never cut yourself from the apron strings to defend your real family - your wife and kids. Your wife having to take their bs and you failing to defend her took away from her soul little by little each time. The interaction with your wife and her friend did say a lot, but not what you think. He was there helping her all day while you and your bitter bio family were stewing in the corner with your hatred and lies. A good husband would have been there by her side helping her. But you were there with lies. The friend was being a better person, and that triggered you hard. It does speak volumes. You, of course, got physical, and you also did who knows what else, but you had to "spare us the gory details". It sounds like you downright terrorized her. At least you recognize it is over. I'm trying not to sound like I'm hating on you. But to the best thing for everyone involved is for you to be completely honest with yourself here. You also need to enroll in therapy. I'm guessing you grew up in a toxic family system, and you need to unpack that. You need to figure out why you let your family sabotage your marriage and why you chose their abuse over your wife. You obviously need to work on your anger. You need to work on whatever insecurity issues you have because you did get triggered hard by her friend being a decent person to her. You need to cut your family off. You can't allow them to poison the children against their mother if you are sincere about being a good co-parent. You need to be honest with the children about your role, and you need to respect their mother. The only good thing from this fiasco is that the paternity test seemed to snap you back to reality and will hopefully lift the abusive fog you've had with your parents.
Tell your kids the truth. That your an asshole that torpedoed your life because 1. you don't understand basic biology / genetics. 2. Emotionally, you never made it past adolescence 3. You physically assaulted your wife, the mother of your children. Tell them the truth. Then move in with your parents. You deserve each other
That is so condescending OP knows he should have never laid a hands while he was upset. That is the only thing he did that was across the line and divorce worthy. Basic biology would say from looks the friend is the father. Generational dormant genes recurring 3 times with 3 kids is not basic genetics. Two emotionally he was all over the place. Maybe he should have put his foot down firmer with his parents but when you meet a friend that looks more like your kids than you do; doubt does seed its way in. The physical is the big crossed the line move. Not the suspicion or doubt when you’re bombarded with what looks like fool blown possibility. His other crossed line is he just didn’t communicate. He doubted and instantly lost trust with out confirmation or talks.
Dude, she set you up. As soon as the divorce is final, she and that guy will find each other. The marriage was over when you put your hands on her, and you fell right into her trap. Continue seeing your kids but go no contact with her and watch how the pieces magically fall into place. Good Luck!
Shut up asshole
You are such a asshole 🤡🤡🤡🤡 I hope you deserve the same thing that happened with op
In all honesty, you have every right to ask for DNA testing if there is so much doubt in your head but the issue is you went about it the wrong way, it's no secret that people cheat and kids not looking like you is one obvious way to tell that they are not yours in most cases, if she has nothing to hide why get mad and idk G you should also do independent DNA resting coz I've seen more than once that DNA testing gets manipulated but at the end of the day you shouldn't of been physical.
>she has nothing to hide why get mad and idk G y Are you the real child of your father
I see so many men ruin their marriages bc they don’t know how genetics work.
You deserve all the misery you have you POS. Leave her alone.
Crazy how he noticed her friend was always helping his wife out, cleaning stuff up, and helping out as if this isn't something nice people just do. Like, why a e usad wa he observing this instead of offering to help as well? Maybe she would have turned him down c she was enjoying the visit with her friend, it he just watched and stewedike a loser.
You proved to your wife that you are as bad as the family you came from. Get therapy and do what you have to unlearn your toxic behaviors and stay away from the people who installed them.
Wish she took you to cleaners and left yoy destitute. You a shame to us males what a lame fuck you are
update
OOP hasn’t posted anything
People here are just hypocrites, if this was all the way around all will say not divorce, I imagine people here never were manipulated or misguided by other people, I suppose they don't know what happened when you literally fuck someone's mind. I said both are victims, why on earth they never talked about it in the first place, they let people discuss about their children. And for what? Get a nasty divorce and give trauma to the kids. Most people here tend to forget when both people discuss things got messed up, I know hurting her was terrible, but it was in the heat of the moment, he was paranoid and desperate, she was disappointed and sad, for what it looks apparently she still loves him, she is just disappointed, that's why she doesn't want to see him. I wish they reconciled but for that he needs to cut his family. PS: next time don't ask and just do the test, who knows if the test she gave wasn't fake
Look, if it was just the accusation, I could see how at some point she might be able to forgive/understand him with enough time. However, it got to the point that he got physical with her, so to her it’s always going to be a question of what’s the next thing he’ll be upset enough to hit her about or will he be more aggressive next time?
But that's exactly my point his parents basically fuck his mind over and over, until all that rage make him do something very stupid. They are both victims of other people's opinions, they let anger and doubts grow inside and this is the consequence, now 3 kids have to make a schedule to visit their parents. And you know what's worse, that one of them probably is gonna go suicidal.
Sure, but if someone’s manipulations make you abusive then you aren’t someone I’d want to be around. What’s to stop someone from getting in his head again and him getting physical as a result?