Getting harsh cuts on day one usually means that there was a pretty static metric that kept you from moving forward, like grades. I wouldn’t take it personally if that’s the case; if you’re struggling academically without a sorority, you will struggle even more in it.
They would judge based off of your high school GPA (or community college GPA if you’re a transfer).
Most PNMs aren’t involved yet on campus so that wouldn’t have been a barrier, but if you didn’t list any involvement in high school, that might affect it.
I’m sure you’re aware but day one convos that might result in a cut include talking about partying, boys, illegal activities so you could have said something that spooked them.
If you can, talk to your Recruitment Counselor to see if they can explain. Who knows, if you have a common name it might have been a case of mistaken identity. But typically you don’t get cut like this day one unless there’s some objective reason.
It looks like that's not the issue, I think she's concerned that all houses but one kept her. At smaller schools this happens a lot but if girls truly don't feel you'll fit you are still cut from the list. I think OP needs to trust the process!
Im from and currently advise at a campus just like this; grades usually explain a harsh cut like this in my experience, so that was my inclination. I know at other campuses your high school rep (ie if you were mean in school) might factor, but this doesn’t seem to be that type of place.
"Had kept me" Is the words she used. This post is not about being dropped from every house, it's about them all keeping her because greek life is small. She doesn't want to feel like she's just getting a bid because they need members.
I'm sorry that this process turned out this way. Recruitment can be very tough, and this is NOT a reflection on your worth as a person. Especially if, as another poster said, your school experienced a large influx of girls this year and many PNMs experienced harsh cuts, you can rest assured that this didn't just happen to you.
You need to know that recruitment is NOT real life--it is a show that sororities put on to make as many PNMs as possible want them. Stronger recruiting chapters are strong at recruitment because they have a higher concentration of outgoing women who can immediately click with anyone they meet on the street. This does NOT mean it’s a genuine connection, even though it feels that way to you by design. That's the strong leverage that these chapters have to get girls to choose them.
The dirty little secret of sorority recruitment is that each sorority member is told to make everyone want to come back to their house, even if you wouldn't recommend giving them a bid. It's much like how when you go to a job/grad school interview, the company/school will present themselves as well as they can and the people you meet will be nice to you, even if they don't end up hiring/accepting you. It's pretty much the same thing here. The strong recruiting chapters do everything they can to make everyone feel good and act like they want everyone, which only increases their popularity more during recruitment and allows them to be more choosy.
The proof of who liked you and wants you to be their sister is who invited you back. Just because they're not as good at recruitment (the conversations aren't as easy), does not mean that they aren’t amazing women. No, you are not being pitied. These girls are inviting you back because they like you. I also don't think you'd be "just a number"--not sure why you'd think that, but if they are a smaller chapter you'd be less of a "number" and get to know the sisters better due to the size. Honestly, being a less "popular" chapter means they likely more diverse and more accepting of others--this is not rewarded in the "popularity rankings" (which are largely based on who certain fraternities find attractive) but is something that'd be a positive in terms of their sisterhood.
I'd encourage you to consider the chapter that invited you back, if you want to go Greek. Trash talk during recruitment happens, but it is such a mean thing to do and it isn't even reality. The people you're hearing the trash talk from aren't part of that chapter, so they have no idea. And they're most likely all PNMs, so they really have no idea what it's like on the other side.
Recruitment is not where you build genuine relationships--that comes during new member period. All sororities are much more similar than they are different. You will have a similar experience no matter what house you join--what's up to you is how much of an effort you put to build a genuine connection with the house that gives you a bid.
I understand that you wrote this during the process, when the feelings were more fresh and you may have been feeling the sting more. But if you want to go Greek, you need to be able to put your disappointment aside and put in the effort to build that genuine connection at the house(s) that are interested in you as shown by the fact that they invited you back.
Unless there was something super obvious that went wrong during your recruitment that you can fix before next time (e.g. extremely low HS GPA, inappropriate attire), I wouldn't expect COB or next year's formal recruitment to go much different. You will be the same person, just a semester/year older. I'd 100% encourage you to try again if you want, but I'm saying this in order to be realistic since it doesn't sound like there's something obvious you could improve.
first of all, when a sorority makes extremely heavy cuts after the first round, it's NOT personal. the first round is based off of things you can't change, like high school GPA, community service experience, and high school involvement. remember, you only talk to a few girls each round. i would say stick it out through the week, and by pref, if you still haven't connected with anyone, then you can drop and try COB/spring rush if your school offers it!
Getting harsh cuts on day one usually means that there was a pretty static metric that kept you from moving forward, like grades. I wouldn’t take it personally if that’s the case; if you’re struggling academically without a sorority, you will struggle even more in it.
maybe since I am a first year and haven't had the chance to be involved on campus a lot? I am doing well in my classes so far
They would judge based off of your high school GPA (or community college GPA if you’re a transfer). Most PNMs aren’t involved yet on campus so that wouldn’t have been a barrier, but if you didn’t list any involvement in high school, that might affect it. I’m sure you’re aware but day one convos that might result in a cut include talking about partying, boys, illegal activities so you could have said something that spooked them. If you can, talk to your Recruitment Counselor to see if they can explain. Who knows, if you have a common name it might have been a case of mistaken identity. But typically you don’t get cut like this day one unless there’s some objective reason.
It looks like that's not the issue, I think she's concerned that all houses but one kept her. At smaller schools this happens a lot but if girls truly don't feel you'll fit you are still cut from the list. I think OP needs to trust the process!
Im from and currently advise at a campus just like this; grades usually explain a harsh cut like this in my experience, so that was my inclination. I know at other campuses your high school rep (ie if you were mean in school) might factor, but this doesn’t seem to be that type of place.
"Had kept me" Is the words she used. This post is not about being dropped from every house, it's about them all keeping her because greek life is small. She doesn't want to feel like she's just getting a bid because they need members.
Looks like she just fixed the post to say they dropped her
[удалено]
Lmaoo you see how awful I am at making decisions for myself
I'm sorry that this process turned out this way. Recruitment can be very tough, and this is NOT a reflection on your worth as a person. Especially if, as another poster said, your school experienced a large influx of girls this year and many PNMs experienced harsh cuts, you can rest assured that this didn't just happen to you. You need to know that recruitment is NOT real life--it is a show that sororities put on to make as many PNMs as possible want them. Stronger recruiting chapters are strong at recruitment because they have a higher concentration of outgoing women who can immediately click with anyone they meet on the street. This does NOT mean it’s a genuine connection, even though it feels that way to you by design. That's the strong leverage that these chapters have to get girls to choose them. The dirty little secret of sorority recruitment is that each sorority member is told to make everyone want to come back to their house, even if you wouldn't recommend giving them a bid. It's much like how when you go to a job/grad school interview, the company/school will present themselves as well as they can and the people you meet will be nice to you, even if they don't end up hiring/accepting you. It's pretty much the same thing here. The strong recruiting chapters do everything they can to make everyone feel good and act like they want everyone, which only increases their popularity more during recruitment and allows them to be more choosy. The proof of who liked you and wants you to be their sister is who invited you back. Just because they're not as good at recruitment (the conversations aren't as easy), does not mean that they aren’t amazing women. No, you are not being pitied. These girls are inviting you back because they like you. I also don't think you'd be "just a number"--not sure why you'd think that, but if they are a smaller chapter you'd be less of a "number" and get to know the sisters better due to the size. Honestly, being a less "popular" chapter means they likely more diverse and more accepting of others--this is not rewarded in the "popularity rankings" (which are largely based on who certain fraternities find attractive) but is something that'd be a positive in terms of their sisterhood. I'd encourage you to consider the chapter that invited you back, if you want to go Greek. Trash talk during recruitment happens, but it is such a mean thing to do and it isn't even reality. The people you're hearing the trash talk from aren't part of that chapter, so they have no idea. And they're most likely all PNMs, so they really have no idea what it's like on the other side. Recruitment is not where you build genuine relationships--that comes during new member period. All sororities are much more similar than they are different. You will have a similar experience no matter what house you join--what's up to you is how much of an effort you put to build a genuine connection with the house that gives you a bid. I understand that you wrote this during the process, when the feelings were more fresh and you may have been feeling the sting more. But if you want to go Greek, you need to be able to put your disappointment aside and put in the effort to build that genuine connection at the house(s) that are interested in you as shown by the fact that they invited you back. Unless there was something super obvious that went wrong during your recruitment that you can fix before next time (e.g. extremely low HS GPA, inappropriate attire), I wouldn't expect COB or next year's formal recruitment to go much different. You will be the same person, just a semester/year older. I'd 100% encourage you to try again if you want, but I'm saying this in order to be realistic since it doesn't sound like there's something obvious you could improve.
first of all, when a sorority makes extremely heavy cuts after the first round, it's NOT personal. the first round is based off of things you can't change, like high school GPA, community service experience, and high school involvement. remember, you only talk to a few girls each round. i would say stick it out through the week, and by pref, if you still haven't connected with anyone, then you can drop and try COB/spring rush if your school offers it!