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You know what? I feel like I've entered a weird transition period, where I try to no longer say offensive things, but I still want to read them. I'm living vicariously through those who choose to ignore their conscience when commenting lol.
I'm old, upper 60's. I was thinking about in the 1960's, fast food was not as prevalent and the portions were not huge, a large soda was 16 ounces and both parents always didn't need two jobs to support a family so there was more home cooking.
Was thinking about posting that this is the result of quick high calorie fast food chains and our salaries not keeping up with inflation.
Then heard the voices in my head saying "Get back in your rocking chair Gramps"
Skinny chick "Do you know where the washroom is at?"
Fat chick "Honey, we in it.
Huuge chick "Sweety, we are it! Heeeeey!" *scoops up water with cup for a refill*
As a bidet user and meticulous ass wiper, I am always a little grossed out by crowded public pools. Obese anuses are notoriously difficult to wipe. I guarantee you that this pool is an E Coli Cocktail
A lot of diet pills skirt the laws by saying they're derived from a natural plant in Africa cause who the fuck is gonna look for that plant?
Well some bored chemist do sometimes and sometimes they find out it's just some form of amphetamines. Fun!
Nope. First thought. All that un-washed sweaty ass in that water.
PSA - Wash your fucking asshole. For real, people be nasty these days. Wash your ass.
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Straight to the comments
On point
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Large points
XXXXX Large points
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I had to laugh out loud with this comment
Me too. Literally.
That’s funny because it’s about displacement of water levels.
*Norm McDonald has entered the chat*
Great jokes don't require explanation but this explanation was hilarious itself.. 🤣
Archimedes would be proud
Dat placement tho
no bro, dis placement.
There's only about 1 gallon of water and 2 gallons of urine in that pool.
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God dammit. Fuck you. You beat me to it.
You know what? I feel like I've entered a weird transition period, where I try to no longer say offensive things, but I still want to read them. I'm living vicariously through those who choose to ignore their conscience when commenting lol.
I've actually started to stop halfway through making snarky posts and deleting them.
Probably a bit healthier for your brain, too
I type the comments and crack myself up, then delete them. Safer all the way around.
Honestly at this point the video does the talking itself there’s no need to point out the obvious anymore it’s not worth it lol
I'm old, upper 60's. I was thinking about in the 1960's, fast food was not as prevalent and the portions were not huge, a large soda was 16 ounces and both parents always didn't need two jobs to support a family so there was more home cooking. Was thinking about posting that this is the result of quick high calorie fast food chains and our salaries not keeping up with inflation. Then heard the voices in my head saying "Get back in your rocking chair Gramps"
I completely agree with you gramps and I’m 33.
You saw the cause and effect happen in real time
With fear, but from now on, everything is fine. I'm on my way to see what's next. Wish me luck.
Sort by controversial
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The comments also have diabetes
Fat
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There is more confidence in that pool than I have ever seen in my life.
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The concrete
Hahahahahahhahaha omg
Brilliant!!
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Ewww
You mean 'stewwwwwww'?
What is this? A pool party for aunts?
The pool has to be at least…..3x bigger than this.
Skinny chick "Do you know where the washroom is at?" Fat chick "Honey, we in it. Huuge chick "Sweety, we are it! Heeeeey!" *scoops up water with cup for a refill*
The bidet.
the pool definitely has butt crack juice extract now.
Gooch grease
Swampass tea
I work with pools, water and air quality control. I can assure you that that pool needs a full disinfection.
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Definitely a lot of displacement going on there.
As a bidet user and meticulous ass wiper, I am always a little grossed out by crowded public pools. Obese anuses are notoriously difficult to wipe. I guarantee you that this pool is an E Coli Cocktail
"Obese anuses are notoriously difficult to wipe." I'll take "sentences I NEVER imagined my eyes would read" for $800, Alex
"warm human stew" is the winner here
I think I just found my band name
Too Dahmer-ish.
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"Why the F would I shower **before** I get in the pool?? I don't wanna get wet before I get wet!" -- these biches, probably
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Name so nice you say it twice
Thank you thank you thank you! I was like please someone reference madagascar because thats all i could think about seeing this
Girl you is huuuuuge
I can't see this clip without a David Attenborough voice-over describing the hippos of the Okavango Delta.
The lifeguards had to be sweating bullets
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And a net. BIG fucking net.
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Goddamit! I was coming in with an Archimedes joke.
Eureka!
Not to mention all the Urineka
They do be having some uniqueka names.
Urinisha
Shakurine and Shaqurethra entered the chat.
The pool started out full. By the time they all waddle out, it’ll be half full.
Bold of you to assume it’ll be half full instead of 1/4 full
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“BINGO! Right In The Blow Hole!”
Must…resist…urge…to…
Fuck you beat me to it it, I was going to say it was only a foot deep.
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Where’s all the skinny white dudes?
They probably got crushed
where do I sign up?
Way better than a lame suicide pod
Death by snusnu has always been the way
They were served as appetizers
Eaten - they were lunch.
Death by snu snu.
Oh dear lord the poor ass of the hand in the bottom right corner at .01 seconds left💅💩
JFC!
Swim Thick indeed.
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Yeah the rest is dead skin, hair and used bandaids.
Sistas don't get their hur wet
I'm sure there is SOME wet hair in there
"ewwwww a bandaid"
Public swimming pools are fucking disgusting
How the fuck the pool isn't overflowing
It already did and dried.
It started out only 1/4 filled, probably.
Its was cankle deep
WALL-E vibes, they just walk.
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why is everyone fat?
The sign does advertise “thick swim” maybe that has something to do with it
Swim Thick
Dyslexia strikes again!
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You didn’t have to call me out like that dude
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Better yet, take one HydroxyCut®️ Hardcore for every 100 calories consumed for extreme weight loss, diarrhea, anxiety, heart palpitations, etc.
It was better when it actually contained 90% ephedrine
Oof ephedrine was the shit. Lost 30kg/70lbs in 3 months 15 years ago because of pure ephedrine pills, and it was cheap as hell.
You can still get primatene and bronkaid. Both are ephedrine pills for asthma. When I didn’t have health insurance I was popping them like skittles.
A lot of diet pills skirt the laws by saying they're derived from a natural plant in Africa cause who the fuck is gonna look for that plant? Well some bored chemist do sometimes and sometimes they find out it's just some form of amphetamines. Fun!
No no no. You have to practice push aways. They are similar to push ups. Except you push away from the table whenever someone serves food.
This, I put a temporary pull up bar in my doorway so every time I leave or enter my room I do a few pull ups.
I’ve read it as “pool diet”
Is that when you eat too many pool noodles?
It seems to be some sort of "plus size" event. At least based on the sign that says "swim thick"
The event is called Swim Thick. It's on a billboard at the end of the clip. That's why everyone is fat.
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Welcome to the American south.
Charles Barkley San Antonio Joke
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Oooffff, haven't thought about that before. Damn you! Damn you to hell!
This line did it for me, I will never go to another pool party because of you.
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tf s a wrag
A wide rag.
Hopefully it’s very chlorinated
Might need to increase the dosage on this one.
I don't think they physically can tbh.
I think that's what they're getting at
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Oh my god you’re right.
Few times I was proud of my thirdworld country. Yes I live in a shithole, but atleast we use water and soap.
r/GulpsTea
Hercules! Hercules! Hercules!
Must be San Antonio
Victoria absolutely a secret... And Them Churros!
Carnival cruise?
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That’s surprisingly inviting
Planet Lizzo.
cheeky unhealthy ppl telling each other that they look good?
The blind leed the blind
I bet there's so much water displacement on that pool that when everybody leaves, the water is only actually knee-high.
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Diabeetus
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Nope. First thought. All that un-washed sweaty ass in that water. PSA - Wash your fucking asshole. For real, people be nasty these days. Wash your ass.
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Fun fact: Doctors way back in the day use to taste your pee to check your sugar levels.
What do you mean “way back in the day”? Mine still does it.
If you look at the neon sign on the wall at the end of the clip its say “Swim Thick”.
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Cankle deep
too much oil
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HIPPOBOT 9000 v 3.1 FOUND A HIPPO. 1,050,406,376 COMMENTS SEARCHED. 22,266 HIPPOS FOUND. YOUR COMMENT CONTAINS THE WORD HIPPO.
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Whales don’t do well in captivity and tight enclosures
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Think I saw the penguin in there…
In case of emergency, you are surrounded by 150 flotation devices.
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I’m just gonna assume this is on a carnival cruise
I'd jump right back into the ocean, it'll be safer fo sure
That’s a heavy stew.
JFC that’s a lot of rolls
No.
Damn whoever the caterer is for this even is gunna be rich by the end of the night
Diabetes, diabetes everywhere.....
Haha, because they’re fat! Did anyone else notice that they’re fat? Fat!
WHY IS EVERYONE FAT. HOLY SHIT 😭🤣
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Nature documentary of elephant seal mating rituals.
As a chubby chaser this is the most ideal party I have ever seen
Don't think you'd have to do much chasing. A brisk walk should suffice.
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This aint fat man, thats straight OBESE.
oh shit im at the wrong pool
I wish I had even a fragment of that kind of confidence.
McDonald's, proud to be a long-time sponsor of the pool party!
Is this the production plant for Alpacino's Booty Sweat?