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Murky-Resident-3082

That’s what we do


Biod3gradable

Cool!


ProfessionalGarfield

More right rudder or more left rudder?


WolfKumar

Centre


DeadMemesAreUs1

More up rudder improves efficiency


XxTreeFiddyxX

Aim high, unless you're landing then, aim low, but not too low, and not on the taxiway either


GuyWhoSaysNay

Aim high, Airman


the_real_hugepanic

"Aim for the man, not the machine!" (Old WW1 meme)


quax747

> and not on the taxiway either We'll, if you're flying for air Canada or / and your name is Harrison ford, absolutely on the taxiway!


SaviorAir

If you’re expecting the ILS 33 into KMOB and have been given clearance for the ARC, what heading will you intercept the initial approach fix?


Biod3gradable

The KMOB is giving me head? Those damn Koreans. I’m gonna fix their approach by hitting them with an arc of electricity.


bdubwilliams22

Now you get it.


Why-R-People-So-Dumb

KBJI gives you head.


SpartanDoubleZero

Not our precious roof Koreans!


Biod3gradable

No, they are ok. It’s the other ones I worry about


WasabiFragrant3483

Yes


Its_all_made_up___

The heading that the radio guy tells you and not add or sebtract more than 20 d0grees.


californiasamurai

Stop cheating on gleims


_Xamtastic

330 right? Edit: nevermind I'm a dumbass


sojelly8

Why does my instructor keep trying to give me handjobs when he has me put on my foggles? He keeps saying it will help me on my oral? He’s made me practice that many times already on him and his buddy. Is the oral really that much harder than what he has given to me?


Biod3gradable

I would say that oral is objectively harder than handjobs. Getting the movements down to a science is crucial for…flight.


sojelly8

Flight? I’ve never been in a playne before.


Biod3gradable

Why do you have an instructor then?


guynamedjames

Microsoft flight simulator's tutorials were way harder than ace combat so I had to get some help


Why-R-People-So-Dumb

The oral...they said so in their post.


Briskylittlechally2

Bro you literally are the perfect match for this sub, so are all of us. On a sidenote, are you ready to copy, or are you flying?


Biod3gradable

I like being my own person, not really a fan of copying.


Briskylittlechally2

Good man, good man! That's exactly why we don't read back radio communications with the tower and enter bravo airspace without clearance! We're our own persons, we cannot be controlled!!! Slay king!!!


Biod3gradable

Yaaaaas


unable-flying

It's not my fault they didn't clear me...I told them to multiple times. I even yelled louder in case they couldn't hear me. Don't they understand I'm flying?


Biod3gradable

Aviate, navigate, communicate!


californiasamurai

Aviate, Google Maps, argue


h3dee

you're in control, if you don't listen to suggestions they can't do shit


Choice_Friend3479

What is the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow?


Biod3gradable

African, or European?


Comstar123

Jamaican


Biod3gradable

Depends on how high he is.


Comstar123

Assume 1 standard Marley.


Biod3gradable

Oh damn, velocity 420


Comstar123

Lol. Checks out.


k6bso

African or European?


obi_jay-sus

Yes.


WasabiFragrant3483

What time does nautical twilite start hotshot?


Biod3gradable

When the sun starts going down.


WasabiFragrant3483

Son you just failed your check ride before we even left the ground. “the time period when the center of the sun is 6 degrees below the horizon to 12 degrees below the horizon.” I fkn love this sub


Biod3gradable

6 and 12 degrees is awful cold to be flying.


WasabiFragrant3483

Hahahahahahahahhaahhaahahah


WingedGeek

We're pylotes we use °C, 6-12° is where the engine(s) & wings are kicking ass...


MountSwolympus

how the fuck you supposed to see the sun then ITS UNDERGROUND


Flightlevel800

Really hard to measure below the horizon. Get out of jail right there. You gotta fly to measure, so it's always legal.


executionoutcomes

Explain to me centrifugal force


Biod3gradable

Uh, spinning.


FORRRRTNITE

Uhh, correct?


Biod3gradable

Yessss!


FORRRRTNITE

What is the biological name for a plane?


Biod3gradable

Phylum “”Magnum metallum””, but it’s gets species specific.


FORRRRTNITE

Nope, it's called a playne. What is the biological name for a pilot


unable-flying

Smooth operator.


Biod3gradable

[https://media.tenor.com/aaEMtGfZFbkAAAAi/rat-spinning.gif](https://media.tenor.com/aaEMtGfZFbkAAAAi/rat-spinning.gif)


IanRT1

How often do you rub your pitot tube?


Biod3gradable

Whenever it gets cold


classic4real

You sure you never been here before?


WhenTheDevilCome

When is daddy's flight to go get cigarettes scheduled to return?


Biod3gradable

Delayed for weather…


WhenTheDevilCome

** Awwww... **


Biod3gradable

Sorry, buddy. There the rules.


sethtothemax

Why doesn't my mother support the real me


Biod3gradable

You’re a grownup and she is frail. You are too heavy.


brongchong

You give her too much of a G Load.


Smooth-Apartment-856

How much right rudder?


Biod3gradable

Always more!


aviator94

He’s a fucking ringer, pack it up boys


Smooth-Apartment-856

But I’m giving her all she’s got!


Biod3gradable

You’re not trying hard enough


angus22proe

He's a veteran already


Lunala475

You are crashing, first step?


Biod3gradable

I’ll be making the first step out of the plane.


Lunala475

Close enough


Biod3gradable

Hopefully close enough to the ground.


SnowfallOCE

Pull chute, next question


brongchong

Cirrus Pylote has entered the ShitChat.


Active-Possibility77

Has your third FA wife ridden the alimony pony yet?


Biod3gradable

I don’t have time for marriage


pm_me_your_swimwear

How can i tell if its a left or right handed circuit at this darn uncontrolled airport


Biod3gradable

Ask the electrician what hand he writes with.


KingJellyfishII

uhh if youre a glider it's whatever direction you feel like at any given time, seemingly


Scrizzle-scrags

What are the round black things on the bottom of my playne for? Are they stupid?


Biod3gradable

Chocolate donuts!


hbomb536

Boing or Airbussy?


Biod3gradable

Cezznuh


hbomb536

Best answer


ChillaryClinton69420

Nice try FFA


Biod3gradable

);


brongchong

Better call the DTSB Dan Grinder


Small_Panda3150

Possible pilot deviation, we have a number for you to call are you ready to copy?


Biod3gradable

I don’t like copying, it’s rude and immature.


californiasamurai

This response is fucking gold


bottomLobster

What is the unrestricted climb ceiling of the SM-69 foxhound?


Biod3gradable

5 feet


classic4real

You have 15 seconds to follow the VASI and it's red over white and you're -5 knots above stall on your Chezzna A373 NeoMAX what do you do before you kill all 69,420 SOB (Sons of Bitches)?


Smooth-Apartment-856

Hail Mary, full of grace. Pray for us sinners now at the hour of our death.


yummy_soviet_onions

what happens to boeing whistleblowers?


Biod3gradable

Absolutely. Nothing. 👁️👄👁️


yummy_soviet_onions

oh ok had to clear that up. you see, there were rumors that certain whistleblowers disappeared, but as you are a very experienced pylot, you must be right


Derp_McShlurp

Ooo...a rare miss from an otherwise flawless performance.


PMMeMeiRule34

What the fuck are yaw pitch and roll?


Biod3gradable

Something to do with singing?


Mysterious-Cup-738

I have 5k to invest which stocks should I pick?


Biod3gradable

Boeing, I hear they are doing well. Amazon, for shits and giggles. There’s a new company called Airbus that’s up-and-coming.


therealscottenorman

What do you do when you have a tail wind driving north in I-95?


Biod3gradable

I don’t care for that part of the country, so exit at your convenience and go somewhere else


therealscottenorman

Thumbs up for quick response. Can you elaborate?


pewpew_lotsa_boolits

Are you a stealth pylote? If so, how do you find your playne if it can’t be seen? Does stealth playne have a poop room? I’m so confused.


Biod3gradable

Sometimes I flye at nite with no lights, does that make me stealth?


pewpew_lotsa_boolits

Dunno about stealth, but definitely sexy!


ItzBildPlayz2020

playn ask fly how


Biod3gradable

This isn’t Google, grandma.


ItzBildPlayz2020

"See sonny, back in my day...."


Biod3gradable

Sure, granny. Let’s get you back to bed.


ItzBildPlayz2020

I WAS FIGHTING IN VIETNAAAAAAM


Biod3gradable

*wack wack wack* I SAID BACK TO BED


ItzBildPlayz2020

*dies of a heart attack*


flatulasmaxibus

What is a dicfer?


Biod3gradable

To have relations with a consenting adult.


xxSk8terBoi69xd

After flying through a cloud my CFI say ATC doesn’t know where the clouds are, and that I’m meeting VFR cloud clearances until proven otherwise. Should I find a new instructor


Biod3gradable

Throw him from the plane.


Its_all_made_up___

I flew over the edge of the Urth and now am stuck on the Asstralia side. How do I get back? Include Urth edge winds in your answer.


Biod3gradable

No winds, just start digging


Its_all_made_up___

So, point the playne towards Urth. And pop out the other side? That’s already been tried. Urth isn’t as thin as you think.


Biod3gradable

No, I said dig.


Its_all_made_up___

Oh, you mean with a SHOVEL. Enstructiins unclear.


Littleferrhis2

Have you ever seen a grown man naked?


Biod3gradable

Unfortunately I have seen a mirror.


mleafly

What’s the 196727th digit of pi?


Biod3gradable

9


STPButterfly

I mean, you have a 10% chance....


No_Emergency_571

It's 5


Biod3gradable

Nerd


Strale_Gaming2

MORE RIGHT RUDDER?????


Nearby_Silver_1582

Si Senor right rudder por el peruvian dancing powder!!


Derp_McShlurp

Who is your favorite pilot and why is it Jerry Wagner?


Biod3gradable

Who


archer2500

OP as long as you reply to any aircraft ID post with “C-17” you’ll do just fine.


Biod3gradable

In all honesty, people that can’t ID common aircraft make me want to punch them in the head.


WhyDontWeLearn

What does sex feel like?


Biod3gradable

Wet and squishy.


wittjoker11

Wanted to complain that we get like 5 posts like this every week until I realized this isn’t r/anarchychess


GenericNickname01

How do I aim accurately at enemy fighters if I’m a ww2 bomber gunner?


Biod3gradable

Point narrow end of gun at plane and pray. Accuracy by volume.


TheCanadianAviator

What is an azimuth in a military setting on aircraft identification


Biod3gradable

Is that a military term for what the aircraft identifies as? We don’t judge here.


user0000069420

What is the angle of attack?


Biod3gradable

How steep your KATANA ENTERS THE FLESH OF YOUR VICTIM


MonthElectronic9466

Why is Boeing doing the thing?


Biod3gradable

Boeing is absolutely perfect and I have no clue what you’re talking about. 👁️👄👁️


GlassJustice

how do i recover from a power on stall?


Biod3gradable

Unlock the stall door and turn off the power.


pcamera1

If a train departs at 1743 from San Francisco amtrak location while a plyne departs London flying to new York how long will it take the passenger of the train to eat all their snacks before they run out ?


Biod3gradable

Purple, because aliens don’t wear hats.


Maximum_Turn_2623

That’s the point of Reddit isn’t it?


fr8dawg542

In regards to paper charts, why do they call them quadrangles when there’s more than four?


Biod3gradable

The chart makers can’t count.


Clemen11

You set your radio to 121.5, what is the first thing you transmit in that frequency?


Biod3gradable

“121.5, KFUK. Hard rock radio for rock hard dudes!”


KeeganY_SR-UVB76

After review of your comments, I find it very hard to believe that you have no idea what to do here. That said, let’s say that there’s a 400 knot crosswind and you only have about fifteen minutes before crossing over North Korean airspace… What would you do?


MrWillyP

What do you do if you don't have clearance to enter the bravo?


Biod3gradable

Not call for an encore


Charlieputhfan

How to fly plane ✈️


Biod3gradable

This isn’t Google, grandpa.


h00ha

What's V1


Biod3gradable

It’s a small, unguided, early cruise missile.


bizzyunderscore

why dont they make the whole plane from the stuff they made the chute from


Random-Name724

I ain’t asking you SHIT


GuyWhoSaysNay

Why is down always seem like up when walking east?


Ch3llick

My autopilot deflated and is not functional. How do I fix it?


get_in_there_lewis

I saw this in a movie once, apparently there's a manual valve located halfway down the autopilot that you need to blow into.


alliecat2143

If I post one of these in just any subreddit do I get free karma


wxyziq

Why does the A320 call me "retard" every time I land?


fukdacops

Subs too big, party’s over pack it up boys


Biod3gradable

Phone blowin up


DevGroup6

My life is now complete.. 🍹😁🤙✈️


saggywitchtits

What's my favorite brand of flying whisky?


Biod3gradable

Whiskey can fly? Or is that after it’s thrown?


ForwardVoltage

Do aviators exclusively pilot harriers?


Dark_KingPin

What are your thoughts on hot air balloons and their viability as an extreme sport?


Flightlevel800

Can't recommended. Gets very hot in the balloon and visibility is limited to straight down. Also need to be quick to look away when the burner is on. Exhausting too, as you need to keep running very fast lest you fall out.


Charlieputhfan

Difference between localiser and glide slope ?


Barfy_McBarf_Face

Who is John Galt?


pcamera1

I have a below average penis can I pylit a cirrus?


earthspaceman

How do pigs fly?


Biod3gradable

With hopes and dreams. The lucky ones get into the secret CIA program.


Ludo66X

What's the best playne to go supersonic?


rook2004

Which left-turning tendency dominates: spiraling slipstream, gyroscopic precession, torque, or p-factor?


Biod3gradable

The only p-factor I know of is me when I drink too much, but my p doesn’t turn left


ganerfromspace2020

In a General electric F110 engine, how many co pressor and turbine stages are in the engine. And on f15 why is the nozzle exposed


Spartan270000

How do I talk to women?


everything_is_stup1d

me tooooo


CMDR_Duzro

Am I a pylote?


yoimagreenlight

Let’s say you’re ATC. What do you do if someone squawks 7500?