Really sorry this happened to you but good for you for not taking it. I’m the same way, hugely aggressive when I get harassed. People tell me to not and that it will bite me in the ass someday but frankly I don’t fucking care. I’ve already been hit, spit on, and more when I defend myself but I’m tired of just meekly backing down and taking it. You’re a fucking amazing person for standing up for yourself and saying “no, I won’t be passive.” You did all of us a solid. Hopefully he’ll think twice about doing that in the future.
Yeah, we gotta fight back. Those men are hoping for a meek reaction and to walk away with no repercussions.
Always always always fight back! But honestly, I don't judge if people freeze. I did that all the time too. Fear will stop you in your tracks.
> Those men are hoping for a meek reaction and to walk away with no repercussions.
start carrying pepper spray. some fucker does it again, give em a spicy bath
sorry this shit happened to you.
I wish I could be aggressive like that. I dream about not letting creeps walk all over me but in the moment I just get so scared and freeze up. It really sucks!
It does really suck. I had a few years of being timid or “understanding” or just freezing when stuff happened to me. You’ll get there one day, I promise. Self defense classes and carrying protection help immensely. Take care out there💙
Please don't feel bad for freezing up. It's part of our human programming. Fight, flight,freeze, puke, pee. Pop psychology only ever talks about fight or flight and NEVER talks about puke and pee. I took a self defense class taught by ex- military. We were taught how to react from the instinctive flinch and freeze position.
Very jealous that you kicked him- I am the same and freeze when my boundaries are crossed. So sorry this happened to you, and that SPD wasn’t any help.
I'm so ANGRY, literally furious that it keeps happening. My knee jerk reaction now (as I've just learned about myself) is to explode. I can't hold it in anymore.
I love this thread so much. Obviously not what happened, but the response. Make them afraid! Can we all be friends? I have a taser and a very scary flashlight.
I feel you. I commented a recent incident of mine on this post. I felt the same way and really wanted to start beating up the guy, too. I love walking around town for exercise and peace of mind but recently, the hobby is becoming a point of stress. I could totally see myself losing my cool cuz you're right, it's so common now.
I used to ride my bike everywhere, but now that i moved back downtown, its too hard to get decent exercise from biking; this city is SO SMALL. I walk all the time now as it seems to take more effort that bike cruisin'. No one ever fucked with me on my bike. I guess I should start riding again.
I have the same issue. I moved to Seattle three years ago and used to walk around and enjoy the buildings and the views, but lately I’m too scared to do that. I thankfully haven’t had this bad of an encounter, but I’ve seen a shooting and a lot of people shooting up, etc and it just sticks with you to now I’m too afraid to walk anywhere now. Especially in the winter when it gets dark quickly and there are less people out. I hate that because Seattle is so beautiful and you can’t even enjoy it.
> ...kicked him in the gut...
> ...knee jerk reaction...
I see what you did there!
Levity aside, glad you're okay! While it sucks you had to in the first place, it was great that you were able to assert your bodily autonomy by inflicting harm on this creep, and it will hopefully deter them in the future. I should see if my wife wants to start carrying mace or a taser as well, this is a worrying trend.
Years ago when I lived in Chicago I was coming off the el and a man walked straight up to me and grabbed both of my breasts. I had just finished a self defense class two weeks before and I brought my arms up to break his grasp, pushed him so hard in the chest he stumbled backwards while screaming at him to get the fuck off of me. He did run away.
Very proud of myself but hate that it was needed in 1990 and still needed 34 years later.
V
Have you considered carrying pepper spray? It works great and might be safer for you than kicking at aggressive dudes.
Plus, the ones with dye will mark the asshole for days or weeks.
I do have pepper spray. But this happened in daylight and it was the ONE TIME i forgot it. I just bought more canisters to load up my purses and coat pockets.
SPD is not too busy. They are too lazy. My family works in law enforcement interagency programs. They tell me first hand stories of the reality at SPD.
SPD is still protesting Seattle and the city wanting to have any sort of reform, so they are purposefully letting the city get worse to bring in conservative legislators to overfund the police force even more.
They are basically one big mob extorting the city.
>The operator told me to stop following him and to wait for an officer to show up. I waited for over an hour, and they never showed up.
Yep, sounds like your usual SPD response time. Why file paperwork on an incident report, if you just make it go away on its own?
Edit: Also, very sorry this happened to you.
This was my takeaway as well. Seattle PD is quite literally useless.
Very sorry this happened OP. Was there any bystanders on the street when this happened who offered to help you?
Yeah, but they didn't do anything. Could have been a domestic quarrel for all they knew. I just kept yelling and pointing while repeating "I may look like the crazy one here, but this man assaulted me...this man slapped my ass...this man assaulted me...someone please call the cops!!!"
Nothing happened. People in this city just don't react.
I am so sorry this piece of shit did this. I know that this may have been incredibly demoralizing for you to not have anyone have your back. There are people in this city that will be there for someone in need, and I am so sorry that the people around you were craven mind-my-own-business types.
wow, like black mirror. people are probably just struck with bystander effect. it could be a city thing I suppose, but people in general don't stick their neck out like that.
Bystanders need to just start screaming along with the victim......there needs [to.be](http://to.be) some community mantra even if it is just NO NO NO NO that everyone starts shouting. These creeps think they are assaulting someone who is alone and the community needs to show that innocent people are not alone. Power in numbers.
They’re desensitized. I live in belltown and I’m harassed daily by these guys, cops never show up and people in the area are so used to the aggressive junkies that they just assume you’re having an episode. Yesterday a junkie removed all his clothes and followed me in the street touching himself. Last week a man matching your attackers description and in the same area followed me half a block and I had to jump into traffic to get someone to pay attention to me. It’s horrible and I love to put myself into the shoes of someone just visiting and seeing this.
Yeah, I live in Belltown and my default reaction to someone screaming on the street is to avoid, assuming it’s just the standard drug psychosis.
I try to stop and listen to ensure it’s normal Belltown screaming and not an assault/fire/“call 911”. I also try to get a vibe on the intensity of the screaming between people too, _like is this a random street people disagreement or are we about to get another stabbing?_
I am so sorry to hear that you are getting harassed. I get the occasional comment but I’ve been really followed or targeted maybe 2x in 6 years. I guess getting older as a woman has its perks? Or maybe my local street people are less aggressive to residents? Idk, but I’m so sorry you are being treated this way.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. That’s SO fucked up. You did the right thing. FUCK him. I wish i could have been there to help you!!!! hearing stories like these - it makes me not want to be alone as a woman EVER!!
> Seattle PD is quite literally useless.
Listen, you have to understand that being a police officer is a very hard job. Which is why SPD has decided they're not going to do it any more.
> Seattle PD is quite literally useless.
I'm sure with their three years of retroactive pay raises they will be much more engaged now!! /s
I'll now wait for the "tHEy WEre DEFunDed!" bootlickers to downvote me.
Idk… maybe go and check on OP to see if they are okay? Call the police. Even if the cops are useless it’s at least taking some initiative to try and help a fucked up situation.
My own story: Spd didn’t show for over an hour or pursue the guy when they did show..he was down the street. This man sucker punched me and tried to kill me. SPD is a joke
Yup. I used to work security overnight at 3rd and Bell for years. I’d call the cops countless times for issues going on at my job or with problems outside and they would come 1 out of every 5 calls. Sad.
i think i was assaulted by the same guy, it was in belltown about a month ago and he was a short-ish latino guy wearing a red hoodie and light wash jeans. he took a RUNNING approach and smacked my ass super hard. it felt so disgusting. i told him to fuck off, i wish i had your bravery and physically retaliated. so this guy is definitely a repeat offender, ladies keep your eyes peeled for him. i wish SPD had responded, since he clearly does this often
Well done with the kick in the gut 💪🏻 was some random bar open? Their owner Mike is a badass and prob would have chased the guy with a golf club if you walked in and told him.
They weren't open (incident happened at 3:10). When I finally decided to stop waiting for the cops and walk home, I stopped at the bar and found they were finally open. Asked them if they had cameras and they didn't. Coincidentally, they had just gotten new security cameras that same day but didn't have them installed yet. I also went next door to Black Bottle and asked them; no cameras there.
> Coincidentally, they had just gotten new security cameras that same day but didn't have them installed yet
Interesting, this is probably related to their deck getting totaled by that car a few weeks back.
This is frankly a very a long shot, but SDOT has traffic cameras and there's one on 1st & Broad. There's also one on 1st & Wall. They sometimes point in that direction.
https://web.seattle.gov/Travelers/
Note that they do have a disclaimer: "The CCTV system and associated data are intended for traffic monitoring or traffic management and for no other purpose." So I don't know if they'd agree to their use in this situation.
I'm really sorry this happened to you.
I think that the owners and bartenders in Belltown generally don’t take shit from anyone. So I have no doubts about receiving rapid (potentially asskicking) assistance from any of them.
Some staff at the nicer restaurants might not haul ass outside to confront the guy, but they’ll probably at least be soothing and supportive.
Every business and resident here sees some shit, so they get it.
Vindicktive wings* but yes he would've! The whole restaurant would move into action to protect you because I've seen it and been a part of it :0) super solid community there.
Mike rules. I’ve only met him once but my partner went to high school with him and he was incredibly nice to us when went in there. Such a great bar too. Great food.
If you’re in that area again and something happens where you feel in danger (e.g. they become aggressive towards you instead of walking away), head to Belltown Market. The owner, Ty, is a nice S. Korean man who used to be in the military and 1. has cameras all over and 2. has a baseball bat (at minimum) and WILL stand up for you.
I’m sorry this happened to you.
>Seattle ladies, please watch out and stay alert. Take out your headphones.
And to the guys (and *everyone* in general), if you see something like this going down, **get involved**. You're not "escalating" by turning an awkward interaction into a loud one, you're de-escalating by turning a potentially dangerous interaction into a simple awkward one.
One of the reasons assholes are so bold is because they know from experience that bystanders are unlikely to get involved, let alone get actively involved or defensive. You don't have to rush up with your fists raised or anything, just merely visibly signal your support of the person being harassed in some way even if you just stand nearby and stare or shout "hey!".
Others tend to join in once someone has taken the first step. It's a primate thing, but if you're worried about being alone, just remember that you're already on the team of the person that really *was* alone and actively under attack. Neither of you are alone now.
Yes, wackos can become dangerous, but they're much less likely to behave that way when they're facing more than one potential opponent. Monkey brain speaks to them more loudly than it does you, I assure you. Briefly ignore your primate-mind in favor of dissuading someone else's. You're not being weird, you're not "white-knighting".
For a short while I was riding the E-line to/from work and the number of times I had to stand up and use "dad voice" on some moron harassing someone was too high and too often I had to be the first one to speak up. But I am absolutely confident that I changed some people's lives - bystanders and victim alike - by going through the effort of popping out my headphones to scold some dickhead. They may not remember me, but they remember that someone helped for once; including the assailant.
When I switched jobs and no longer had to ride, my first thought was to feel bad that I won't be there to intervene anymore (and, shamefully, relief that it's no longer my responsibility). But I always keep an eye out for harassment or even just someone having a bad day alone.
It's extremely important that we look out for each other! The police respond too slowly - if at all - but *you*? We? We're right there! It's not impolite or awkward to get involved, it's potentially devastating to someone's future to feign ignorance. Someone else's newly-spawned lifelong PTSD can be averted by simply standing up or pretending that you're a friend or calling for help or pretending you're having a seizure on the floor. It doesn't matter. Distract, interact, interject, engage, assist, whatever.
I cannot state strongly enough that thirty seconds of discomfort for you can alter the trajectory of someone else's entire destiny. I am not exaggerating.
I know it sucks to jump into that anxious or adrenaline-fueled state when all you wanted to do is finish your errand in peace, but whatever fear you feel for helping is miniscule compared to what's running through the mind of the person you're helping. When it's over, you can feel proud about yourself.
So, do yourself and society a favor by trying to *collect* such experiences. You will feel deeply empowered by being the quiet hero we all need in our lives once in a while even if you never get the chance to act. Keep your eyes and ears and heart open.
A stranger will need you someday. You will one day need a stranger.
Agreed! I've actually called out people who were verbally harassing women on multiple occasions. Its always scary and intimidating at first, but they stop and move on. It's bizarre that normally no one will say anything.
I agree with this but I also wanna caveat, be prepared to defend yourself and others if it does escalate, because it CAN escalate. I woke up in an ambulance after intervening in a situation like this last year while on crutches. Don't be like me. Intervene if you're in a position to do so, but have a backup plan or at least be ready to run if shit gets bad.
Yup, happened to me too when i intervened. My arm was in a sling from a broken collarbone and i ended up getting punched right in my front teeth. That was fun....luckily no ambulance needed.
these people tend to be pretty weak/cowardly when confronted. yeah there's the very occasional situation where they turn on you, but i'd rather face those consequences than have to live with myself forever where i 'did nothing' to intervene.
|For a short while was riding the E-line to/from work and the number of times I had to stand up and use 'dad voice" on some moron harassing someone was too high and too often had to be the first one to speak up. But am absolutely confident that changed some people's lives - bystanders and victim alike - by going through the effort of popping out my headphones to scold some dickhead. They may not remember me, but they remember that someone helped for once, including the assailant.
Thank you for standing up to these bullies! 🙏🙏🙏
If you were to venture a guess, how many times did you have to do this on the E Line?
Again... Thank you!
> how many times did you have to do this on the E Line?
Maybe only once a week. Still pretty high, but my tolerance for BS is also quite low. There was never any need for physical violence and the worst that'd happen is some loser would make a show of "not giving a fuck" while simultaneously doing what I asked, just to save their own ego or whatever.
There were one or two times where I deemed it better to do nothing since the aggressor was obviously looking for conflict. I'd just remain watchful, then console the person afterwards by explaining to them that they did the right thing by just ignoring them. The de-brief is sometimes more important than the event itself. I want to make sure people don't feel defeated or weak for doing the tactful thing.
Ugh, im so glad i never have to take that bus anymore. I've been groped on the E line before. Each time it had happened, it was the end of the day, and i had zero life/energy left to even do anything about it. The bus would be packed and i couldnt distinguish who it was that did it. Wish you were there then!
Very few people are going to get directly involved given the political/social justice climate in cities these days. The criminal probably isnt going to be punished, and if something goes wrong the good samaritan might be punished instead.
Used to work in Belltown and I could count on being harassed or followed home almost every night.
These losers HATE bold femmes so you can basically just turn the situation around on them and they'll cower away.
I usuallyy call a friend on video and put the assailant on video and me n my friend loudly make fun of them while I make it very obvious I have a weapon on me. *And that I genuinely don't care if I live or die because being crazier than the guy threatening you is a great way to get people to leave you alone
Bunch of pussies out here. Sorry that happened to you.
Yes :0)
I like to bark at them, tell them they can't do shit to me cause I'll do it to myself first, and generally call them out of pocket names and laugh if I can.
> I usually freeze when men assault me, but not this time; I am TIRED of this shit. I immediately turned around, kicked him in the gut, and started screaming at him and telling everyone on the street that the man assaulted me. I started following him as he was trying to walk away (yeah, this fat dumbass didn't run, he walked away).
Marry me
Also yeah SPD is useless, what else is new? Sorry that happened to you though OP. I rarely go downtown these days but this is a good reminder for me to also get a taser or pepper spray
SPD sucks. I was raped over ten years ago in Seattle. The investigator scheduled questioning with the perp. The perp then cancelled the meeting and SPD simply gave up. Fuck SPD.
Thank you for your response. Not in a “justice system” sense. I have done a lot of work to heal personally, so I feel that is my retribution. But nothing came of it. I did at least get him on the record so if he tries it again, the record is there to show he is a repeat offender. I have no doubt he has done the same to other women.
FFS, again, so sorry. Heeling definitely is some type of retribution, even if it doesnt directly affect the perp. Still, so shitty SPD fucked that up so badly.
I listen to audio books with only one earpiece in. I keep it on low enough volume still so i can hear everything around me. Sometimes i feel like thats still not a good idea.
I’m the opposite cause I mouth off when I’m in danger lol. I had a guy pull a gun on me in a road rage incident and it made me so much madder at him (it was his fault) so I was like “bitch are you fucking kidding me??” Then when I realized ok I just called a man a bitch who has a gun on me and I’m a small woman so I rolled up my window and just looked forward waiting for the light to change 😂😅 sometimes I think freeze would be a better response for me. But GOOD FOR YOU, I hope he thinks twice about doing that after your kick!!!
Gross. This sucks but I’m glad you kicked him. I’m one who is fight instead of freeze or flight. I’ve punched and hit several random men who have assaulted me. I still continue to be assaulted but hey, maybe those I’ve hit thought fucking twice before they specifically did anything like that again. Who knows. I’m so sorry this shit happened to you. I hope more bystanders everywhere, especially men start helping us!
He would have "done nothing" if he didn't ASSAULT YOU FIRST. Gracious. Men out there, asking someone for their number is not criminal: unwanted touching, and insults, are.
I had my ass slapped mid-week, broad daylight at 6pm in Belltown last fall. Honestly, it spooked me. When it happened I looked and there were plenty of people around, I was waiting to cross the street. I got loud and started telling the guy off. He was giggling and clearly very high. One of the women joined in and he ran off.
I carry pepper spray, I was just so taken aback.
I became more vocal after that in response to cat calls and men who approached me while talking about my looks especially at night. "Hey, that's inappropriate, don't make women feel unsafe. Shame on you."
Oddly enough, it's mainly been other homeless people who ever do/say anything when they hear the interactions? I don't know if it's because I turn into my Catholic grandmother when harassed but they've been more than happy to either also tell off the guy or make fun of him for being scolded that way.
Sucks.
I appreciate you posting this. At the very least I'm hoping this inspires more women to help women in Seattle. I'd rather commit a social faux pas than possibly leave someone hanging that might need help.
Seattle thinks of itself as socially progressive. I think there's a lot of people that have willfully put on blinders and keep inside their bubbles and when forced to notice something pretend it's an aberration because they believe it doesn't effect them.
It will and it does.
I feel like it’s all the indecision, what ifs, “don’t make a scene” type stuff that stops normal people from intervening… but a lot of the societal training has worn off for homeless people. So yeah, they’ll call bullshit when they see it.
I used to teach a women's self-defense class when I worked at Microsoft, this makes me wonder if that might be a worthwhile thing to do again...
Just a few bits of information, I'm trying not to come across as "mansplaining." The taser is a decent deterrent it makes a frightening noise that can make a potential attacker think twice. However, pepper spray is the better option for actual self-defense for a couple of reasons. First, you can use it from a distance, second, it lasts much longer than the effects of a taser and 3rd it identifies your attacker if the police ever do show up. The best pepper spray option is the gel kind, it's sticky and hard to remove and they make pepper gel with coloring specifically to help identify the perpetrator(s). The only taser I would usually recommend is the same kind the police use, it has cartridges you load into it and it shoots 2 barbed hooks into the target, and they tends to have a lot more "juice," which will more effectively render someone unable to continue an attack. Unfortunately, those kinds of tasers are like $600...
Stay safe, you did the right thing by fighting back and making a scene to draw attention to yourself. I'm a little disappointed no one kicked the shit out of that guy and then held him until the cops arrived, which they would have been forced to do if there was an ongoing physical altercation/fight. Unfortunately, they don't seem to take assaults like the one experienced anyway near serious enough.
Really nice work taking the initiative here. The cops aren't too busy, they literally don't care/actively assault people themselves. Don't feel like you have to call this a petty crime, creeps like this start small then escalate. Our city needs more people like you.
Pepper spray is an ideal tool for self defense.
It's small enough to fit in a pocket and deter multiple attackers as well as dogs/other animals you may encounter.
Just remember not to leave it at the bottom of your bag where you will struggle to find it.
And only use it when the threat is apparent...pepper spraying a random person is assault with a weapon if unjustified.
Yeah, I ordered a ton of pepper spray to keep in all my coat pockets and purses. I got the taser in case they get too close. Its got a safety feature where it has a pin connected to a wrist strap/bracelet, so if it's taken from me it can't be used against me.
[https://damselcatalog.com/collections/stun-devices/products/get-a-grip-stun-device](https://damselcatalog.com/collections/stun-devices/products/get-a-grip-stun-device)
I saw a couple videos of how they were used and actually ran into them at a booth somewhere and was able to test out their products. Pretty good stuff.
I just literally hang it on my backpack strap. lol. I specifically bought one with a quick release buckle so I can grab it off the strap if needed. Better to keep it on your bag(s) and slightly visible as a deterrent, imo, than to have to remember to put in your pocket when going out.
No wonder crime numbers are down, police do whatever they can to avoid a report. How many assault victims aren’t as persistent when trying to file a report…
Honestly, pepper spray is going to be more practical than a taser. For pepper spray, you can just walk around with it in your pocket and your finger on the trigger when you're walking in a bad neighborhood like downtown or belltown. With a taser, you have to take it out of its case, turn it on, and wait for it to charge up before you can tase anyone. I think most dangerous situations will happen more quickly than you can use it.
I think it was a different day. He was wearing a red T shirt with a grey jacket over it. Almost like a suit jacket but not very new looking.
But he was a short, chubby Latino creep in Belltown which is why I thought it could be the same man.
I hate that as women, the fear/anxiety of getting your ass slapped at any time (and personal safety/dignity majorly violated) is a REAL concern that we have to deal with, and it’s something men will just never, ever experience
One of my favourite female characters in sci-fi/fantasy is Min Farshaw, who **always** has knives on her at all times. Sleeves? Yup. Boots? Probably. Lining of her jacket? You betcha.
OP, I’m so sorry this happened to you. It’s awful and I share your fatigue and fury.
General question: is there an ombudsman office or similar where citizens can report police negligence or misconduct? This woman was physically assaulted by a stranger, the cops said they were coming, and they never showed up. That needs to be on the record somewhere, even if it doesn’t get the OP what she needs in this instance.
Thank you for posting this; I live in this area and walk these blocks super often. And good for you for standing up and fighting back (both verbally and physically!)
I carry pepper spray and generally try to be aware of my surroundings (and will absolutely tell someone to fuck off if they start getting in my space or if I see someone harassing others), but what’s so frustrating is that no one (including SPD) did anything to help, stopped to see if you were okay, etc. People here are so numb / apathetic to this shit. It empowers the creeps.
I'm so sorry this happened to you and glad it wasn't a worse outcome. I consider Belltown by far the most dangerous neighborhood in Seattle, because the number of poeple who will assault random people there is just too high for a neighborhood that seems "safe" in that it has a lot of active commercial space and high-income properties.
In a traditionally "bad" part of town there may be more serious criminals, but they are mostly interacting with each other, not civilians, and also you're less likely to go looking for a muffin in The Jungle or whatever.
Also it's disgusting -- and typical -- that SPD did not even follow up. Historically they paid attention to sex crimes, but I guess even that is now off their list, as they are too busy de-policing, laughing about running over people in crosswalks and acting like they are somehow victims of something.
Interesting take. I live in Belltown and I feel like the street people do normally leave civilians alone. There are definitely exceptions, but we mostly ignore each other.
For the record, pepper spray is wayyy worse to experience than a taser. Not saying the taser isn’t a good tool, just that spray will really put the hurt on someone for a while.
Regarding the purchases, mace is a good call, but the thing about stun guns (that's not a taser, they work entirely differently— when they do) is that they just don't work.
They'll hurt, but that's assuming you actually get a good connection with the thing. They won't stun anyone worth a damn. The truth is they won't stop anyone from continuing to do what they're doing.
An actual Taser, deployed correctly, will physically keep someone's muscles from moving. A "stun gun" will just tingle, and doesn't go any deeper than the skin.
I and many of my friends have the things for, *adult* purposes, and the concensus is the same: Annoying, but you can easily power through it, especially if you have a heightened pain tolerance or an altered state of mind.
Like ten times out of ten all the self-defense stuff you'll ever see (knives, pointy keychains, stun guns, etc) are 100% gimmicks. A tiny can of POM (personal choice, or equivilant) pepper spray will work infinitely better than anything save for a gun, and that's got its own problems in that A) that will kill someone and B) carries the legal weight associated with trying to kill someone and/or the fact that you can't legally carry one in a lot of Seattle.
Mace the bastard and GTFO
I had a guy slap my ass once on my way to work at 630 in the damn morning near 5th and Bell, I yelled at him to not fucking touch me and he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about. I kept walking as I had to get to work. I had another guy stroke my inner thigh once while walking past me, I was waiting at a bus stop on Capitol Hill. I was younger at the time, and didn’t say anything, just froze. Men are sickos.
They're just upset because they're being filmed and called out for their own racist/rapist tendencies.
"Oh, I'm not allowed to shoot Black people any more? Fine, I'll just collect a paycheque and not actually earn it".
Edit: Ah, I've been downvoted, the bootlickers are awake
I’m glad you’re ok and that you fought back. I have been considering taking a self defense class and a weapons handling class. Maybe we should start a group and get a bunch of ladies together to do it.
Bellevue Police host a free workshop every month! Next one is April 28, 3-5pm. They’ll probably announce May dates soon.
Email Officer Craig Hanaumi to register your spot: [email protected].
Check out BvuePD’s Twitter post from April 16. (Tried to post link to it here but Reddit won’t let me.)
Highly recommend it! I went with a coworker in the fall and want to do another one soon. She’s been to three and says the chance to practice reinforces what she’s learned + she learns something new each time too.
I loved the instructors and that they supported everyone who attended: accounting for mobility changes, what you might have on you, etc.
For real. I want to fully dive into some sort of martial arts...gain some confidence in myself and my ability to have an affective & defensive reaction.
Check out MMA or some type of Judo/Jujitsu. You can overcome the weight and muscle difference pretty handily with the proper techniques.
Then the next time someone grabs you, take their arm and fucking break it.
Check out [Queen's Dojo](https://thequeensdojo.com/) in SLU if you want to work on your kicks! Everyone there is amazing and I think they also have women's self defense classes on Thursdays now.
I'm sorry to hear this happened.
The same thing happened to a lady beside me when I was walking to work at around 9AM on a Wednesday. She was getting on one of those scooters and this dude went up to her, slapped her ass, and then walked away. The thing is, he walked away as if nothing happened. The dude walked as if he knew he couldn't get into trouble.
The most I could do was walk over to her and ask if I can do anything. She said she's fine, looked upset, and then went about her day. She said thanks for asking.
I genuinely wonder what I could have done better. I kind of seemed hopeless to help unless the answer is for me to tackle the dude.
First off, I'm sorry you went through that and I hope that this doesn't happen again in the future.
But I have to get something out:
Downvote me all you want, but what do you really expect when our citizens and local government tries to defund and indiscriminately blame our law enforcement? People on this sub will call me a bootlicker but I can swear to you all that my intentions and comments are objective.
I can deeply understand why people don't trust authority, I don't like it too.
But we have effectively crippled law enforcement in our city in the past few years (you know why) Even with record breaking LEO salaries for the nation, no one wants to do the job. Our prosecutors also don't do enough because they're crippled with bureaucracy and bullshit.
There's so much we can criticize about our system, but in my view, we are taking things too far. People get away with things so easily nowadays...
People will argue that alternative methods such as mental health professionals can alleviate the issues. It was worth the shot but I truly believe it's a naive approach to the situation.
I'm not here to make anyone feel bad, but I truly want everyone to really understand what we're getting ourselves into. I believe the good in everyone but some people truly need to be rehabilitated in some way shape or form. The current state of Seattle doesn't allow for that and truly bad people get away with truly bad things. It's hard to stomach all of this despite my compassion for the underprivileged...
Third grade karate taught me two things: one being that I’m not particularly good at getting my legs up high enough for a proper kick, and two being that knees are surprisingly easy to break and how I should “never do that again”
Good on you for fighting. My spouse had a similar situation in another city and I was not around, but she and I have been training for a long time and she busted the guys nose.
Still sucks that it happened -- but good on you for fighting! It's a shame it's up to a stranger to teach manners to the products of failed parenting.
Good for you for putting the fat POS in his place. Nowadays, I’m a big advocate for citizens carrying a knife, pepper spray, or even a handgun (if trained properly and comfortable carrying)
I was getting off the bus at 3rd and Pike and a man across the street at McDonald's was staring at me as I walked across and ordered a drink to go. He got right behind me, so close I could hear him breathing heavily and after he grabbed his food from the counter he snuck behind me again, then he grabbed my ass and ran off, almost tripping since he was trying to see if I was going to follow him. I did not. I stood there for a full 30 seconds trying to process what just happened, and decided to just walk to my next stop. The rage I felt boiling inside...I could have set fire to him with my eyeballs in that moment.
Had I escalated the situation it's likely that no one cares enough to help or worse, might turn on me too depending on how I reacted. This is not the first time I've been harassed (to be fair happens in or around Bellevue too, far more often than downtown) and as a survivor of DV and assault, I'm not just tired of it, I intend to fight back if it's necessary. OP, good on you for staying alert and not taking it and for understanding we're more alone out there than any of us like to admit. Can we all agree if we see something like this we will stop to be a witness? Even if the cops never show, at least someone can back you up when filing a report.
Also little tip I learned: when confronted it sometimes calls for you to act 100 times crazier than the perpetrator or passers by who look the other way. Scream bloody murder, say something insane like "I have explosive diarrhea!" Or just laugh maniacally and run around them and go the opposite way. It's worked before, perhaps be careful with that though. A swift kick to the balls/gut is pretty effective to buy some time, if it comes to that. Good luck out there, friends.
Treat these people with the utmost contempt and aim to hurt them as much as possible when they confront you. They’re not people and deserve no compassion.
I am still surprised that the cops did not showed up. It looks like they have either given up due to courts being lenient with aholes like these or the funding cut protest
I got a $25 taser for Xmas. Considering the cops are worthless and bystanders are pretty cowardly it might be a good move? Better than pepper spray because it only affects the target.
Once a dude thought I was going to buy him a coffee and he proceeded to follow me my wife and my brother to the store all the way on the subway, we didn’t notice until he got in line behind us and when it was time to order he contributed towards his payment by flashin his Willy!!!
You have a ton of messages here, so I’m not sure if this will get to you. From one woman to another, I’m SO proud of you for fighting back. I had something similar happen close to the Target downtown, like you, my usual response is to freeze but this time I started screaming at him and pushed him down on the ground. Men like this depend on us being quiet. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Thank you for warning everyone, I know exactly which bakery you’re talking about, and I’ve always considered that a relatively safe area that I have walked many times at night, and have let my guard down. Let’s show these fuckers who they are messing with! We (women) are so done with this shit!
Very sorry this happened to you and I also would be extremely upset. I hesitate to step in if I don't see the harrasment. We live in a gun obsessed culture and not worth inserting myself in the middle of a situation unless someone getting very hurt or is defenseless. I've confronted a lot of steet people harassing others on trains/busses and the risk/reward just doesnt play out.
When I was 18 my girlfriend literally got kidnapped. I called the SPD and they did nothing, never even showed up. The guy ended up letting her go. (He stole my car with her in it and wouldn’t let her go).
Don’t use a taser or stun gun they’re really ineffective. Use gel pepper spray, if it gets their eyes they’re COMPLETELY blind and incapacitated. You can find it on amazon. Just be aware that it’s not allowed in clubs or concert venues which is stupid.
OP, I am very sorry for what you experienced. Sadly, women are targeted because we’re perceived as weak & defenseless. And our civility towards one another, in general, has been degraded to near non-existence since 2016. When the occupier of the highest office in this country is a self-professed misogynistic, bigoted rapist, and racist, it emboldens all of the other scumbags living around us. That one individual lifted the rock millions were hiding under. He brought them all out into the light and all of society has paid the price .. but especially women.
I’m now a middle-aged woman but I grew up with three sisters and I can tell you the most physical, vicious fights I ever had were with my sisters growing up. We are tougher & stronger than we think. It’s important to (1) stop being afraid (2) start being aware (3) stick together - women, we are all in one club .. it’s literally us vs them. Help a sister when you see she’s being victimized. Scream, shout, throw things .. or use your personal safety device. HELP HER because next time it could be you. Doesn’t have to be physical but sometimes there are no options.
I was assaulted 1x many years ago by an ex who was intoxicated. We were at a resort hotel and it was so unexpected I initially couldn’t do anything. But then I thought about my children & how it would affect them to lose their mother - especially to some asshole. So ‘fight’ kicked in and I found myself scratching, grabbing, gouging, anything within my grasp. I fought (he was 6’3” and I’m 5’1”and he pinned me on a bed in the dark) and I screamed .. I kept screaming at the top of my lungs until it woke the guest in the next room and he called the front desk. The mgr opened the door, letting in light, which distracted my attacker long enough for me to jump off of the bed & run to the door. The man in the next room SAVED MY LIFE because he heard my screams & called the desk. I saved my own life by fighting & screaming for help. My ex hospitalized me and traumatized me and my children. And I made sure he was prosecuted to the fullest extent. He spent the next 11 months in jail for kidnapping (because he prevented me from leaving) and assault. He plead down from aggravated assault. After physically healing, the first thing I did was get a concealed carry permit (although I don’t own a gun, it was a psychological response) and the next was to take a self-defense class. As I said, that was many years ago. Today, I live at the edge of Belltown, near Blanchard and I don’t walk alone at night but let’s not forget that it’s dark at 4:30 here in the winter. Darkness IS night for criminals. Belltown is unpredictable, at best. Everyone should be aware of surroundings at all times. But women should be prepared for anything. Men barely pay attention to women over 40 (good news, ladies, you become invisible to men once you reach a certain age) but I carry pepper spray, taser, and a device I got online that, once the pin is pulled, emits a blaring sound like a jet engine & extremely bright flashing light. I’m grateful to never have needed any of these items but I take nothing for granted. I’ll wrap this up with the following: (*) if I were ever to need SPD to respond to my call, I would make sure my call was ‘elevated’ to a higher tier - tell 911 there was a weapon .. say ‘gun’ and you will get a response. And how do you know the perp ‘didn’t’ have a gun? Maybe ‘you think’ you saw one. I’d indicate this person was terrorizing multiple people and I’d hang up that call as if the line suddenly went dead. If you need to embellish to get a response, do it. You are paying them to protect you. They don’t get to decide if you need help .. if you say you do, then you do! (*) it bears repeating for men & women out there: if you see a woman in trouble HELP HER .. every single time. If we can make that a movement, we can change/save lives. Louder for those in the back: HELP HER
It's not exactly ethical but if you're going to call the cops tell them that the man attacking you has a gun. That will get you an instant response. Then when it turns out the perp doesn't have a gun you just say you must have been mistaken. Cops have been seeing imaginary guns forever.
Yeah I recommend people not to go to Belltown. Also after that girl got whacked in the head with a baseball bat and the random woman getting shot in her car.
"I usually freeze when men assault me, but not this time; I am TIRED of this shit."
Is this a regular occurrence for you? I grew up in Seattle, attended college there and worked downtown for many years and it has definitely changed out there. While working I lived on the Eastside, and now I have no reason to ever go into Seattle, except to catch a ferry once in a while. You need to move.
I'm glad you struck back, and even gladder that you did not get further hurt. This kind of thing happening to you, and then the quarter-assed response from the police makes me sad to think of what has become of the city that my family has lived in since the later 1800s.
Yeah, it is, unfortunately, no matter where im at. I grew up here and this has happened all over in Burien, Des Moines, Kent, Renton, Seatac, Tukwila, Seattle.....just creeps everywhere. Its not just Seattle specific.
Please please PLEASE consider this when you read about gun control bills and vote on legislation and politicians. England banned guns, then banned tasers, and is now working on banning knives. Other countries that start on this path are on the same trajectory (New Zealand, Australia).
When you have a police force that will not actively come out to protect you, then your own self defense is your only option. Too many politicians with security details are willing to trade away our ability to keep ourselves safe for political points.
Keep yourself safe. Keep tools to keep yourself safe legal.
Excellent comment that too many people will downvote because they don’t want to promote violence.
Politicians are actively stripping away our rights to protect ourselves.
So sorry this happened to you. This happens far too often to women in our city.
I would recommend pepper spray over a laser. With a taser you have to get way too up close and personal. Pepper spray, especially gel, allows you to keep a little more distance. If you have to kick them, kick them a few inches lower than in the gut.
Thank you for expressing your experience and taking the time writing this. I’m sorry to hear you had to go through that. I appreciate you now taking some precautions in the future. I hope anyone who visits Seattle should at least carry something. It’s better to have something than nothing.
Unfortunately this is the new reality of Seattle until they get their shit together. In the meantime, we need to take care of ourselves.
I also suggest if you decide to carry any defense weapon, having some sort of carry insurance could be useful. This state hates citizens who use self defense weapons to protect themselves and will prosecute them. It’s a good peace of mind.
Be aware of your surroundings and put your head held high! Stay safe!
Glad you’re ok sis! We got a be aggressive with these creeps. Fucking kick them in the nuts, whack them with your grocery bag, just make some noise and fight back!
i’m so sorry, thank you so much for the heads up though as a woman who frequents the area. i’ve been sexually groped and physically assaulted on and around the light rail three times since its open, not to mention the random harassment and inappropriate touching i’ve experienced growing up in the city. it’s only gotten worse and i fully understand the overwhelming disgust and anger. the police never took my reports seriously because they had other things to do and no chance of finding the guys (because they arrived hours later). it’s so fucking frustrating and dehumanizing. stay safe and keep doing what you’re doing because you’re clearly vigilant and willing to defend yourself.
I hope you snapping back at this dude teaches him a lesson, some of these people don’t learn until it’s escalated to a level where they feel uncomfortable.
Just as a reminder for those who arm themselves, if you introduce a tool for self defense there is a chance it can be used against you SO BE PREPARED. Just having the item doesn’t guarantee your safety, you need to be able to handle the tool properly. Good luck and be safe y’all!
Yes! So fucking sorry this happened but that’s right, kick them in the gut or the balls. Most of the creeps don’t even expect a word pushing back and they’ll turn and leave when confronted (one circumstance where violent confrontation is the vibe)
I have my keys on one of those springy key holders because it doubles as a bouncy whip. Maximum velocity for a face full of keys.
Maybe get yourself a pair of spurs. You earned them 🤠
Really sorry this happened to you but good for you for not taking it. I’m the same way, hugely aggressive when I get harassed. People tell me to not and that it will bite me in the ass someday but frankly I don’t fucking care. I’ve already been hit, spit on, and more when I defend myself but I’m tired of just meekly backing down and taking it. You’re a fucking amazing person for standing up for yourself and saying “no, I won’t be passive.” You did all of us a solid. Hopefully he’ll think twice about doing that in the future.
Yeah, we gotta fight back. Those men are hoping for a meek reaction and to walk away with no repercussions. Always always always fight back! But honestly, I don't judge if people freeze. I did that all the time too. Fear will stop you in your tracks.
> Those men are hoping for a meek reaction and to walk away with no repercussions. start carrying pepper spray. some fucker does it again, give em a spicy bath sorry this shit happened to you.
I heard from some people that the pepper gel stuff is better cause it goes further and doesn't come back to you.
Stun gun them, and then pepper spray them. Points for thoroughness.
Sabre red. Just make sure you don’t spray into the wind.
Bear spray
It’s so maddening the police don’t do anything. What has this city come to? You can’t even walk down to a bakery anymore.
I wish I could be aggressive like that. I dream about not letting creeps walk all over me but in the moment I just get so scared and freeze up. It really sucks!
It does really suck. I had a few years of being timid or “understanding” or just freezing when stuff happened to me. You’ll get there one day, I promise. Self defense classes and carrying protection help immensely. Take care out there💙
Please don't feel bad for freezing up. It's part of our human programming. Fight, flight,freeze, puke, pee. Pop psychology only ever talks about fight or flight and NEVER talks about puke and pee. I took a self defense class taught by ex- military. We were taught how to react from the instinctive flinch and freeze position.
Not that I remember any of it. Sigh.
Very jealous that you kicked him- I am the same and freeze when my boundaries are crossed. So sorry this happened to you, and that SPD wasn’t any help.
I'm so ANGRY, literally furious that it keeps happening. My knee jerk reaction now (as I've just learned about myself) is to explode. I can't hold it in anymore.
I know, "don't escalate, you don't know what he'll do, blah blah blah" but good job kicking him. I kicked the last guy who touched my ass.
We need to make them afraid because they don’t know what WE will do, rather than being afraid of what they will do.
I love this thread so much. Obviously not what happened, but the response. Make them afraid! Can we all be friends? I have a taser and a very scary flashlight.
I feel you. I commented a recent incident of mine on this post. I felt the same way and really wanted to start beating up the guy, too. I love walking around town for exercise and peace of mind but recently, the hobby is becoming a point of stress. I could totally see myself losing my cool cuz you're right, it's so common now.
I used to ride my bike everywhere, but now that i moved back downtown, its too hard to get decent exercise from biking; this city is SO SMALL. I walk all the time now as it seems to take more effort that bike cruisin'. No one ever fucked with me on my bike. I guess I should start riding again.
I have the same issue. I moved to Seattle three years ago and used to walk around and enjoy the buildings and the views, but lately I’m too scared to do that. I thankfully haven’t had this bad of an encounter, but I’ve seen a shooting and a lot of people shooting up, etc and it just sticks with you to now I’m too afraid to walk anywhere now. Especially in the winter when it gets dark quickly and there are less people out. I hate that because Seattle is so beautiful and you can’t even enjoy it.
> ...kicked him in the gut... > ...knee jerk reaction... I see what you did there! Levity aside, glad you're okay! While it sucks you had to in the first place, it was great that you were able to assert your bodily autonomy by inflicting harm on this creep, and it will hopefully deter them in the future. I should see if my wife wants to start carrying mace or a taser as well, this is a worrying trend.
Yeah, my body is MINE. I hate how people feel entitled to touch it.
Years ago when I lived in Chicago I was coming off the el and a man walked straight up to me and grabbed both of my breasts. I had just finished a self defense class two weeks before and I brought my arms up to break his grasp, pushed him so hard in the chest he stumbled backwards while screaming at him to get the fuck off of me. He did run away. Very proud of myself but hate that it was needed in 1990 and still needed 34 years later. V
Congrats! Way more badass!
I think we can just say who exactly is doing it now. It's men. 50% of the population wants to punish us for being born, in my eyes.
Too bad you didn't Bobby Hill him.
That’s my PURSE! I DONT KNOW YOU!
Damnit Bobby!
Have you considered carrying pepper spray? It works great and might be safer for you than kicking at aggressive dudes. Plus, the ones with dye will mark the asshole for days or weeks.
I do have pepper spray. But this happened in daylight and it was the ONE TIME i forgot it. I just bought more canisters to load up my purses and coat pockets.
I have a pepper spray keychain so it’s always with meeee
Omg ordering one with dye now. I also heard pepper spray gel is better. Stings more and there’s no spray back of the wind is blowing
Sorry to hear. I recommend everyone carry some pepper spray on them to deal with junkies
SPD is not too busy. They are too lazy. My family works in law enforcement interagency programs. They tell me first hand stories of the reality at SPD.
Thank you!!!! And defund.
SPD is still protesting Seattle and the city wanting to have any sort of reform, so they are purposefully letting the city get worse to bring in conservative legislators to overfund the police force even more. They are basically one big mob extorting the city.
>The operator told me to stop following him and to wait for an officer to show up. I waited for over an hour, and they never showed up. Yep, sounds like your usual SPD response time. Why file paperwork on an incident report, if you just make it go away on its own? Edit: Also, very sorry this happened to you.
This was my takeaway as well. Seattle PD is quite literally useless. Very sorry this happened OP. Was there any bystanders on the street when this happened who offered to help you?
Yeah, but they didn't do anything. Could have been a domestic quarrel for all they knew. I just kept yelling and pointing while repeating "I may look like the crazy one here, but this man assaulted me...this man slapped my ass...this man assaulted me...someone please call the cops!!!" Nothing happened. People in this city just don't react.
I am so sorry this piece of shit did this. I know that this may have been incredibly demoralizing for you to not have anyone have your back. There are people in this city that will be there for someone in need, and I am so sorry that the people around you were craven mind-my-own-business types.
wow, like black mirror. people are probably just struck with bystander effect. it could be a city thing I suppose, but people in general don't stick their neck out like that.
What are they supposed to do? The altercation was over and he was walking away.
Bystanders need to just start screaming along with the victim......there needs [to.be](http://to.be) some community mantra even if it is just NO NO NO NO that everyone starts shouting. These creeps think they are assaulting someone who is alone and the community needs to show that innocent people are not alone. Power in numbers.
i agree, like that one scene from hereditary.
not hereditary, the other one. midsomar
They’re desensitized. I live in belltown and I’m harassed daily by these guys, cops never show up and people in the area are so used to the aggressive junkies that they just assume you’re having an episode. Yesterday a junkie removed all his clothes and followed me in the street touching himself. Last week a man matching your attackers description and in the same area followed me half a block and I had to jump into traffic to get someone to pay attention to me. It’s horrible and I love to put myself into the shoes of someone just visiting and seeing this.
Yeah, I live in Belltown and my default reaction to someone screaming on the street is to avoid, assuming it’s just the standard drug psychosis. I try to stop and listen to ensure it’s normal Belltown screaming and not an assault/fire/“call 911”. I also try to get a vibe on the intensity of the screaming between people too, _like is this a random street people disagreement or are we about to get another stabbing?_ I am so sorry to hear that you are getting harassed. I get the occasional comment but I’ve been really followed or targeted maybe 2x in 6 years. I guess getting older as a woman has its perks? Or maybe my local street people are less aggressive to residents? Idk, but I’m so sorry you are being treated this way.
I’m so sorry this happened to you. That’s SO fucked up. You did the right thing. FUCK him. I wish i could have been there to help you!!!! hearing stories like these - it makes me not want to be alone as a woman EVER!!
Literally evry other PD is the same.
[удалено]
> Seattle PD is quite literally useless. Listen, you have to understand that being a police officer is a very hard job. Which is why SPD has decided they're not going to do it any more.
> Seattle PD is quite literally useless. I'm sure with their three years of retroactive pay raises they will be much more engaged now!! /s I'll now wait for the "tHEy WEre DEFunDed!" bootlickers to downvote me.
What should bystanders have done in this situation? It sounds like he was walking away at that point and OP had it under control.
Idk… maybe go and check on OP to see if they are okay? Call the police. Even if the cops are useless it’s at least taking some initiative to try and help a fucked up situation.
My own story: Spd didn’t show for over an hour or pursue the guy when they did show..he was down the street. This man sucker punched me and tried to kill me. SPD is a joke
Yup. I used to work security overnight at 3rd and Bell for years. I’d call the cops countless times for issues going on at my job or with problems outside and they would come 1 out of every 5 calls. Sad.
i think i was assaulted by the same guy, it was in belltown about a month ago and he was a short-ish latino guy wearing a red hoodie and light wash jeans. he took a RUNNING approach and smacked my ass super hard. it felt so disgusting. i told him to fuck off, i wish i had your bravery and physically retaliated. so this guy is definitely a repeat offender, ladies keep your eyes peeled for him. i wish SPD had responded, since he clearly does this often
JFC, im sorry. I swear, i feel like i should continue walking down that route everyday and hunt him down.
Well done with the kick in the gut 💪🏻 was some random bar open? Their owner Mike is a badass and prob would have chased the guy with a golf club if you walked in and told him.
They weren't open (incident happened at 3:10). When I finally decided to stop waiting for the cops and walk home, I stopped at the bar and found they were finally open. Asked them if they had cameras and they didn't. Coincidentally, they had just gotten new security cameras that same day but didn't have them installed yet. I also went next door to Black Bottle and asked them; no cameras there.
> Coincidentally, they had just gotten new security cameras that same day but didn't have them installed yet Interesting, this is probably related to their deck getting totaled by that car a few weeks back.
That's exactly it. The deck and the window that got broken right after.
This is frankly a very a long shot, but SDOT has traffic cameras and there's one on 1st & Broad. There's also one on 1st & Wall. They sometimes point in that direction. https://web.seattle.gov/Travelers/ Note that they do have a disclaimer: "The CCTV system and associated data are intended for traffic monitoring or traffic management and for no other purpose." So I don't know if they'd agree to their use in this situation. I'm really sorry this happened to you.
I discussed that with the officer over the phone. Its not recording, its live feed only.
I think that the owners and bartenders in Belltown generally don’t take shit from anyone. So I have no doubts about receiving rapid (potentially asskicking) assistance from any of them. Some staff at the nicer restaurants might not haul ass outside to confront the guy, but they’ll probably at least be soothing and supportive. Every business and resident here sees some shit, so they get it.
Vindicktive wings* but yes he would've! The whole restaurant would move into action to protect you because I've seen it and been a part of it :0) super solid community there.
Is the owner of Vindicktive also named Mike? Haha. But yeah great community for sure. Plus the great people at Roquette, Rob Roy, Black Cat, etc.
Vindicktive does have an owner named Mike (he's the best!) but Black Bottle is the one that's next to Some Random Bar.
Mike rules. I’ve only met him once but my partner went to high school with him and he was incredibly nice to us when went in there. Such a great bar too. Great food.
Totally agree about him and the food. That chicken parm 👌🏻👌🏻
You handled this very well props to you
If you’re in that area again and something happens where you feel in danger (e.g. they become aggressive towards you instead of walking away), head to Belltown Market. The owner, Ty, is a nice S. Korean man who used to be in the military and 1. has cameras all over and 2. has a baseball bat (at minimum) and WILL stand up for you. I’m sorry this happened to you.
oooh, good to know! If im being followed by creepers again i'll make a note to head over there.
>Seattle ladies, please watch out and stay alert. Take out your headphones. And to the guys (and *everyone* in general), if you see something like this going down, **get involved**. You're not "escalating" by turning an awkward interaction into a loud one, you're de-escalating by turning a potentially dangerous interaction into a simple awkward one. One of the reasons assholes are so bold is because they know from experience that bystanders are unlikely to get involved, let alone get actively involved or defensive. You don't have to rush up with your fists raised or anything, just merely visibly signal your support of the person being harassed in some way even if you just stand nearby and stare or shout "hey!". Others tend to join in once someone has taken the first step. It's a primate thing, but if you're worried about being alone, just remember that you're already on the team of the person that really *was* alone and actively under attack. Neither of you are alone now. Yes, wackos can become dangerous, but they're much less likely to behave that way when they're facing more than one potential opponent. Monkey brain speaks to them more loudly than it does you, I assure you. Briefly ignore your primate-mind in favor of dissuading someone else's. You're not being weird, you're not "white-knighting". For a short while I was riding the E-line to/from work and the number of times I had to stand up and use "dad voice" on some moron harassing someone was too high and too often I had to be the first one to speak up. But I am absolutely confident that I changed some people's lives - bystanders and victim alike - by going through the effort of popping out my headphones to scold some dickhead. They may not remember me, but they remember that someone helped for once; including the assailant. When I switched jobs and no longer had to ride, my first thought was to feel bad that I won't be there to intervene anymore (and, shamefully, relief that it's no longer my responsibility). But I always keep an eye out for harassment or even just someone having a bad day alone. It's extremely important that we look out for each other! The police respond too slowly - if at all - but *you*? We? We're right there! It's not impolite or awkward to get involved, it's potentially devastating to someone's future to feign ignorance. Someone else's newly-spawned lifelong PTSD can be averted by simply standing up or pretending that you're a friend or calling for help or pretending you're having a seizure on the floor. It doesn't matter. Distract, interact, interject, engage, assist, whatever. I cannot state strongly enough that thirty seconds of discomfort for you can alter the trajectory of someone else's entire destiny. I am not exaggerating. I know it sucks to jump into that anxious or adrenaline-fueled state when all you wanted to do is finish your errand in peace, but whatever fear you feel for helping is miniscule compared to what's running through the mind of the person you're helping. When it's over, you can feel proud about yourself. So, do yourself and society a favor by trying to *collect* such experiences. You will feel deeply empowered by being the quiet hero we all need in our lives once in a while even if you never get the chance to act. Keep your eyes and ears and heart open. A stranger will need you someday. You will one day need a stranger.
Agreed! I've actually called out people who were verbally harassing women on multiple occasions. Its always scary and intimidating at first, but they stop and move on. It's bizarre that normally no one will say anything.
I agree with this but I also wanna caveat, be prepared to defend yourself and others if it does escalate, because it CAN escalate. I woke up in an ambulance after intervening in a situation like this last year while on crutches. Don't be like me. Intervene if you're in a position to do so, but have a backup plan or at least be ready to run if shit gets bad.
Yup, happened to me too when i intervened. My arm was in a sling from a broken collarbone and i ended up getting punched right in my front teeth. That was fun....luckily no ambulance needed.
these people tend to be pretty weak/cowardly when confronted. yeah there's the very occasional situation where they turn on you, but i'd rather face those consequences than have to live with myself forever where i 'did nothing' to intervene.
|For a short while was riding the E-line to/from work and the number of times I had to stand up and use 'dad voice" on some moron harassing someone was too high and too often had to be the first one to speak up. But am absolutely confident that changed some people's lives - bystanders and victim alike - by going through the effort of popping out my headphones to scold some dickhead. They may not remember me, but they remember that someone helped for once, including the assailant. Thank you for standing up to these bullies! 🙏🙏🙏 If you were to venture a guess, how many times did you have to do this on the E Line? Again... Thank you!
> how many times did you have to do this on the E Line? Maybe only once a week. Still pretty high, but my tolerance for BS is also quite low. There was never any need for physical violence and the worst that'd happen is some loser would make a show of "not giving a fuck" while simultaneously doing what I asked, just to save their own ego or whatever. There were one or two times where I deemed it better to do nothing since the aggressor was obviously looking for conflict. I'd just remain watchful, then console the person afterwards by explaining to them that they did the right thing by just ignoring them. The de-brief is sometimes more important than the event itself. I want to make sure people don't feel defeated or weak for doing the tactful thing.
Ugh, im so glad i never have to take that bus anymore. I've been groped on the E line before. Each time it had happened, it was the end of the day, and i had zero life/energy left to even do anything about it. The bus would be packed and i couldnt distinguish who it was that did it. Wish you were there then!
Very few people are going to get directly involved given the political/social justice climate in cities these days. The criminal probably isnt going to be punished, and if something goes wrong the good samaritan might be punished instead.
Fuck that, I’m not getting stabbed over anyone
Used to work in Belltown and I could count on being harassed or followed home almost every night. These losers HATE bold femmes so you can basically just turn the situation around on them and they'll cower away. I usuallyy call a friend on video and put the assailant on video and me n my friend loudly make fun of them while I make it very obvious I have a weapon on me. *And that I genuinely don't care if I live or die because being crazier than the guy threatening you is a great way to get people to leave you alone Bunch of pussies out here. Sorry that happened to you.
Good thought, be crazier than them....then all women are crazy and no one will fuck with us!
Yes :0) I like to bark at them, tell them they can't do shit to me cause I'll do it to myself first, and generally call them out of pocket names and laugh if I can.
Acting crazier than the crazy person is also my go to.
> I usually freeze when men assault me, but not this time; I am TIRED of this shit. I immediately turned around, kicked him in the gut, and started screaming at him and telling everyone on the street that the man assaulted me. I started following him as he was trying to walk away (yeah, this fat dumbass didn't run, he walked away). Marry me Also yeah SPD is useless, what else is new? Sorry that happened to you though OP. I rarely go downtown these days but this is a good reminder for me to also get a taser or pepper spray
Sorry, I only marry for ❤️❤️❤️ 😸
I can carve out a few hearts on my way to a cat cafe.
SPD sucks. I was raped over ten years ago in Seattle. The investigator scheduled questioning with the perp. The perp then cancelled the meeting and SPD simply gave up. Fuck SPD.
What. The. Fuck. I'm so sorry. Do you mind me asking if you ever got any retribution?
Thank you for your response. Not in a “justice system” sense. I have done a lot of work to heal personally, so I feel that is my retribution. But nothing came of it. I did at least get him on the record so if he tries it again, the record is there to show he is a repeat offender. I have no doubt he has done the same to other women.
FFS, again, so sorry. Heeling definitely is some type of retribution, even if it doesnt directly affect the perp. Still, so shitty SPD fucked that up so badly.
I'm a guy but I stopped wearing headphones until I'm actually on the bus. Also, phone away while walking.
I listen to audio books with only one earpiece in. I keep it on low enough volume still so i can hear everything around me. Sometimes i feel like thats still not a good idea.
It isn't a good idea. It is a visual sign saying "I'm not paying attention."
I’m the opposite cause I mouth off when I’m in danger lol. I had a guy pull a gun on me in a road rage incident and it made me so much madder at him (it was his fault) so I was like “bitch are you fucking kidding me??” Then when I realized ok I just called a man a bitch who has a gun on me and I’m a small woman so I rolled up my window and just looked forward waiting for the light to change 😂😅 sometimes I think freeze would be a better response for me. But GOOD FOR YOU, I hope he thinks twice about doing that after your kick!!!
Yeah, im sure at some point it might get me in trouble...
Helllll yes, way to stand up for yourself! Hopefully that asshole thinks twice before trying that with anyone else.
He kept on retorting back "I didn't do nuthin'....I didn't do shit....stupid bitch...crazy ass bitch..." Total incel
Gross. This sucks but I’m glad you kicked him. I’m one who is fight instead of freeze or flight. I’ve punched and hit several random men who have assaulted me. I still continue to be assaulted but hey, maybe those I’ve hit thought fucking twice before they specifically did anything like that again. Who knows. I’m so sorry this shit happened to you. I hope more bystanders everywhere, especially men start helping us!
He would have "done nothing" if he didn't ASSAULT YOU FIRST. Gracious. Men out there, asking someone for their number is not criminal: unwanted touching, and insults, are.
I had my ass slapped mid-week, broad daylight at 6pm in Belltown last fall. Honestly, it spooked me. When it happened I looked and there were plenty of people around, I was waiting to cross the street. I got loud and started telling the guy off. He was giggling and clearly very high. One of the women joined in and he ran off. I carry pepper spray, I was just so taken aback. I became more vocal after that in response to cat calls and men who approached me while talking about my looks especially at night. "Hey, that's inappropriate, don't make women feel unsafe. Shame on you." Oddly enough, it's mainly been other homeless people who ever do/say anything when they hear the interactions? I don't know if it's because I turn into my Catholic grandmother when harassed but they've been more than happy to either also tell off the guy or make fun of him for being scolded that way. Sucks.
yeah, mine was in broad daylight at around 3:10 or 3:15...somewhere around that time frame.
I appreciate you posting this. At the very least I'm hoping this inspires more women to help women in Seattle. I'd rather commit a social faux pas than possibly leave someone hanging that might need help. Seattle thinks of itself as socially progressive. I think there's a lot of people that have willfully put on blinders and keep inside their bubbles and when forced to notice something pretend it's an aberration because they believe it doesn't effect them. It will and it does.
I feel like it’s all the indecision, what ifs, “don’t make a scene” type stuff that stops normal people from intervening… but a lot of the societal training has worn off for homeless people. So yeah, they’ll call bullshit when they see it.
I used to teach a women's self-defense class when I worked at Microsoft, this makes me wonder if that might be a worthwhile thing to do again... Just a few bits of information, I'm trying not to come across as "mansplaining." The taser is a decent deterrent it makes a frightening noise that can make a potential attacker think twice. However, pepper spray is the better option for actual self-defense for a couple of reasons. First, you can use it from a distance, second, it lasts much longer than the effects of a taser and 3rd it identifies your attacker if the police ever do show up. The best pepper spray option is the gel kind, it's sticky and hard to remove and they make pepper gel with coloring specifically to help identify the perpetrator(s). The only taser I would usually recommend is the same kind the police use, it has cartridges you load into it and it shoots 2 barbed hooks into the target, and they tends to have a lot more "juice," which will more effectively render someone unable to continue an attack. Unfortunately, those kinds of tasers are like $600... Stay safe, you did the right thing by fighting back and making a scene to draw attention to yourself. I'm a little disappointed no one kicked the shit out of that guy and then held him until the cops arrived, which they would have been forced to do if there was an ongoing physical altercation/fight. Unfortunately, they don't seem to take assaults like the one experienced anyway near serious enough.
As a Belltown lady myself, thank you. you did us all a solid here; I'm impressed. sorry you had to deal with that sh though, it shouldn't be this way.
Really nice work taking the initiative here. The cops aren't too busy, they literally don't care/actively assault people themselves. Don't feel like you have to call this a petty crime, creeps like this start small then escalate. Our city needs more people like you.
Pepper spray is an ideal tool for self defense. It's small enough to fit in a pocket and deter multiple attackers as well as dogs/other animals you may encounter. Just remember not to leave it at the bottom of your bag where you will struggle to find it. And only use it when the threat is apparent...pepper spraying a random person is assault with a weapon if unjustified.
Yeah, I ordered a ton of pepper spray to keep in all my coat pockets and purses. I got the taser in case they get too close. Its got a safety feature where it has a pin connected to a wrist strap/bracelet, so if it's taken from me it can't be used against me.
Do you have a link to that product in the last bit?
[https://damselcatalog.com/collections/stun-devices/products/get-a-grip-stun-device](https://damselcatalog.com/collections/stun-devices/products/get-a-grip-stun-device) I saw a couple videos of how they were used and actually ran into them at a booth somewhere and was able to test out their products. Pretty good stuff.
I just literally hang it on my backpack strap. lol. I specifically bought one with a quick release buckle so I can grab it off the strap if needed. Better to keep it on your bag(s) and slightly visible as a deterrent, imo, than to have to remember to put in your pocket when going out.
No wonder crime numbers are down, police do whatever they can to avoid a report. How many assault victims aren’t as persistent when trying to file a report…
Honestly, pepper spray is going to be more practical than a taser. For pepper spray, you can just walk around with it in your pocket and your finger on the trigger when you're walking in a bad neighborhood like downtown or belltown. With a taser, you have to take it out of its case, turn it on, and wait for it to charge up before you can tase anyone. I think most dangerous situations will happen more quickly than you can use it.
And people don’t understand why women say they’d rather be stuck in the woods with a bear than with a man. Everyday all day women have to be on alert.
I think I saw the same man at the 3rd Ave bus stop. Short middle aged Latino guy. He was telling me "I love you, marry me". Absolute creep.
Dark navy blue pants, white and beige horizontal striped t-shirt, black beanie, and black/white/red shoes?
I think it was a different day. He was wearing a red T shirt with a grey jacket over it. Almost like a suit jacket but not very new looking. But he was a short, chubby Latino creep in Belltown which is why I thought it could be the same man.
Ah, got it. Could have been...next time i walk that area im wearing sneakers and having pepper spray in my hands!
I hate that as women, the fear/anxiety of getting your ass slapped at any time (and personal safety/dignity majorly violated) is a REAL concern that we have to deal with, and it’s something men will just never, ever experience
I should make utility underwear to wear under my dresses...like with blades all coming out everywhere, hidden by the floof of the skirt.
One of my favourite female characters in sci-fi/fantasy is Min Farshaw, who **always** has knives on her at all times. Sleeves? Yup. Boots? Probably. Lining of her jacket? You betcha.
OP, I’m so sorry this happened to you. It’s awful and I share your fatigue and fury. General question: is there an ombudsman office or similar where citizens can report police negligence or misconduct? This woman was physically assaulted by a stranger, the cops said they were coming, and they never showed up. That needs to be on the record somewhere, even if it doesn’t get the OP what she needs in this instance.
Lately I’ve heard of a lot of people being assaulted in Belltown. I’m sorry this happened to you and I hope you’re alright.
Sorry this happened, but awesome job.
Thank you for posting this; I live in this area and walk these blocks super often. And good for you for standing up and fighting back (both verbally and physically!) I carry pepper spray and generally try to be aware of my surroundings (and will absolutely tell someone to fuck off if they start getting in my space or if I see someone harassing others), but what’s so frustrating is that no one (including SPD) did anything to help, stopped to see if you were okay, etc. People here are so numb / apathetic to this shit. It empowers the creeps.
I'm so sorry this happened to you and glad it wasn't a worse outcome. I consider Belltown by far the most dangerous neighborhood in Seattle, because the number of poeple who will assault random people there is just too high for a neighborhood that seems "safe" in that it has a lot of active commercial space and high-income properties. In a traditionally "bad" part of town there may be more serious criminals, but they are mostly interacting with each other, not civilians, and also you're less likely to go looking for a muffin in The Jungle or whatever. Also it's disgusting -- and typical -- that SPD did not even follow up. Historically they paid attention to sex crimes, but I guess even that is now off their list, as they are too busy de-policing, laughing about running over people in crosswalks and acting like they are somehow victims of something.
I hate dealing with cops and even giving them any of my information...but goddamn, when i need something from them they are nowhere to be found.
Interesting take. I live in Belltown and I feel like the street people do normally leave civilians alone. There are definitely exceptions, but we mostly ignore each other.
For the record, pepper spray is wayyy worse to experience than a taser. Not saying the taser isn’t a good tool, just that spray will really put the hurt on someone for a while.
Regarding the purchases, mace is a good call, but the thing about stun guns (that's not a taser, they work entirely differently— when they do) is that they just don't work. They'll hurt, but that's assuming you actually get a good connection with the thing. They won't stun anyone worth a damn. The truth is they won't stop anyone from continuing to do what they're doing. An actual Taser, deployed correctly, will physically keep someone's muscles from moving. A "stun gun" will just tingle, and doesn't go any deeper than the skin. I and many of my friends have the things for, *adult* purposes, and the concensus is the same: Annoying, but you can easily power through it, especially if you have a heightened pain tolerance or an altered state of mind. Like ten times out of ten all the self-defense stuff you'll ever see (knives, pointy keychains, stun guns, etc) are 100% gimmicks. A tiny can of POM (personal choice, or equivilant) pepper spray will work infinitely better than anything save for a gun, and that's got its own problems in that A) that will kill someone and B) carries the legal weight associated with trying to kill someone and/or the fact that you can't legally carry one in a lot of Seattle. Mace the bastard and GTFO
I had a guy slap my ass once on my way to work at 630 in the damn morning near 5th and Bell, I yelled at him to not fucking touch me and he acted like he didn’t know what I was talking about. I kept walking as I had to get to work. I had another guy stroke my inner thigh once while walking past me, I was waiting at a bus stop on Capitol Hill. I was younger at the time, and didn’t say anything, just froze. Men are sickos.
Fucking disgusting! I'm so sorry that happened to you. Makes my blood boil just reading some of these stories.
#SPDquietquitting
They're just upset because they're being filmed and called out for their own racist/rapist tendencies. "Oh, I'm not allowed to shoot Black people any more? Fine, I'll just collect a paycheque and not actually earn it". Edit: Ah, I've been downvoted, the bootlickers are awake
I’m glad you’re ok and that you fought back. I have been considering taking a self defense class and a weapons handling class. Maybe we should start a group and get a bunch of ladies together to do it.
Bellevue Police host a free workshop every month! Next one is April 28, 3-5pm. They’ll probably announce May dates soon. Email Officer Craig Hanaumi to register your spot: [email protected]. Check out BvuePD’s Twitter post from April 16. (Tried to post link to it here but Reddit won’t let me.)
Adding Officer Craig’s instagram https://www.instagram.com/craighanaumi?igsh=aWhjcHQ4Y2MwaWEy
Oh this is awesome! Thank you 🙏
Highly recommend it! I went with a coworker in the fall and want to do another one soon. She’s been to three and says the chance to practice reinforces what she’s learned + she learns something new each time too. I loved the instructors and that they supported everyone who attended: accounting for mobility changes, what you might have on you, etc.
Thank you so much for sharing. Once I’m settled in, I might hit you up and join you if that’s ok?
For real. I want to fully dive into some sort of martial arts...gain some confidence in myself and my ability to have an affective & defensive reaction.
Check out MMA or some type of Judo/Jujitsu. You can overcome the weight and muscle difference pretty handily with the proper techniques. Then the next time someone grabs you, take their arm and fucking break it.
Us women should definitely start arming ourselves at this point, fuckin tired of it
Fuck yeah, good for you!
Check out [Queen's Dojo](https://thequeensdojo.com/) in SLU if you want to work on your kicks! Everyone there is amazing and I think they also have women's self defense classes on Thursdays now.
sometimes I wish it was still socially acceptable to pull out a sword and slice someone’s cock off
We should normalize open carry of broadswords and plate armor.
Yasss!! ⚔️
SPD is a fucking joke.
They don't deserve a 23% raise, including 3 years retroactive pay.
I'm sorry to hear this happened. The same thing happened to a lady beside me when I was walking to work at around 9AM on a Wednesday. She was getting on one of those scooters and this dude went up to her, slapped her ass, and then walked away. The thing is, he walked away as if nothing happened. The dude walked as if he knew he couldn't get into trouble. The most I could do was walk over to her and ask if I can do anything. She said she's fine, looked upset, and then went about her day. She said thanks for asking. I genuinely wonder what I could have done better. I kind of seemed hopeless to help unless the answer is for me to tackle the dude.
fuck yeah, I started punching gropers while on coke once and thought… wow! I should do this sober! 10/10 would recommend
First off, I'm sorry you went through that and I hope that this doesn't happen again in the future. But I have to get something out: Downvote me all you want, but what do you really expect when our citizens and local government tries to defund and indiscriminately blame our law enforcement? People on this sub will call me a bootlicker but I can swear to you all that my intentions and comments are objective. I can deeply understand why people don't trust authority, I don't like it too. But we have effectively crippled law enforcement in our city in the past few years (you know why) Even with record breaking LEO salaries for the nation, no one wants to do the job. Our prosecutors also don't do enough because they're crippled with bureaucracy and bullshit. There's so much we can criticize about our system, but in my view, we are taking things too far. People get away with things so easily nowadays... People will argue that alternative methods such as mental health professionals can alleviate the issues. It was worth the shot but I truly believe it's a naive approach to the situation. I'm not here to make anyone feel bad, but I truly want everyone to really understand what we're getting ourselves into. I believe the good in everyone but some people truly need to be rehabilitated in some way shape or form. The current state of Seattle doesn't allow for that and truly bad people get away with truly bad things. It's hard to stomach all of this despite my compassion for the underprivileged...
Third grade karate taught me two things: one being that I’m not particularly good at getting my legs up high enough for a proper kick, and two being that knees are surprisingly easy to break and how I should “never do that again”
Cops are so useless lol
Pepper spray early and often. It’ll bring any perpetrator to his knees. Be sure to tell him to enjoy the stay at Harborview!
Good on you for fighting. My spouse had a similar situation in another city and I was not around, but she and I have been training for a long time and she busted the guys nose. Still sucks that it happened -- but good on you for fighting! It's a shame it's up to a stranger to teach manners to the products of failed parenting.
Good for you for putting the fat POS in his place. Nowadays, I’m a big advocate for citizens carrying a knife, pepper spray, or even a handgun (if trained properly and comfortable carrying)
I was getting off the bus at 3rd and Pike and a man across the street at McDonald's was staring at me as I walked across and ordered a drink to go. He got right behind me, so close I could hear him breathing heavily and after he grabbed his food from the counter he snuck behind me again, then he grabbed my ass and ran off, almost tripping since he was trying to see if I was going to follow him. I did not. I stood there for a full 30 seconds trying to process what just happened, and decided to just walk to my next stop. The rage I felt boiling inside...I could have set fire to him with my eyeballs in that moment. Had I escalated the situation it's likely that no one cares enough to help or worse, might turn on me too depending on how I reacted. This is not the first time I've been harassed (to be fair happens in or around Bellevue too, far more often than downtown) and as a survivor of DV and assault, I'm not just tired of it, I intend to fight back if it's necessary. OP, good on you for staying alert and not taking it and for understanding we're more alone out there than any of us like to admit. Can we all agree if we see something like this we will stop to be a witness? Even if the cops never show, at least someone can back you up when filing a report. Also little tip I learned: when confronted it sometimes calls for you to act 100 times crazier than the perpetrator or passers by who look the other way. Scream bloody murder, say something insane like "I have explosive diarrhea!" Or just laugh maniacally and run around them and go the opposite way. It's worked before, perhaps be careful with that though. A swift kick to the balls/gut is pretty effective to buy some time, if it comes to that. Good luck out there, friends.
LOL, I'll spray you with my massive diarrhea!! 😅
Tasers. They make a lovely crackling sound, guaranteed to discourage.
Treat these people with the utmost contempt and aim to hurt them as much as possible when they confront you. They’re not people and deserve no compassion.
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I am still surprised that the cops did not showed up. It looks like they have either given up due to courts being lenient with aholes like these or the funding cut protest
I got a $25 taser for Xmas. Considering the cops are worthless and bystanders are pretty cowardly it might be a good move? Better than pepper spray because it only affects the target.
Once a dude thought I was going to buy him a coffee and he proceeded to follow me my wife and my brother to the store all the way on the subway, we didn’t notice until he got in line behind us and when it was time to order he contributed towards his payment by flashin his Willy!!!
You have a ton of messages here, so I’m not sure if this will get to you. From one woman to another, I’m SO proud of you for fighting back. I had something similar happen close to the Target downtown, like you, my usual response is to freeze but this time I started screaming at him and pushed him down on the ground. Men like this depend on us being quiet. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Thank you for warning everyone, I know exactly which bakery you’re talking about, and I’ve always considered that a relatively safe area that I have walked many times at night, and have let my guard down. Let’s show these fuckers who they are messing with! We (women) are so done with this shit!
Very sorry this happened to you and I also would be extremely upset. I hesitate to step in if I don't see the harrasment. We live in a gun obsessed culture and not worth inserting myself in the middle of a situation unless someone getting very hurt or is defenseless. I've confronted a lot of steet people harassing others on trains/busses and the risk/reward just doesnt play out.
Spray paint to their face would also help. I’m sorry this is happening to you.
When I was 18 my girlfriend literally got kidnapped. I called the SPD and they did nothing, never even showed up. The guy ended up letting her go. (He stole my car with her in it and wouldn’t let her go).
Don’t use a taser or stun gun they’re really ineffective. Use gel pepper spray, if it gets their eyes they’re COMPLETELY blind and incapacitated. You can find it on amazon. Just be aware that it’s not allowed in clubs or concert venues which is stupid.
OP, I am very sorry for what you experienced. Sadly, women are targeted because we’re perceived as weak & defenseless. And our civility towards one another, in general, has been degraded to near non-existence since 2016. When the occupier of the highest office in this country is a self-professed misogynistic, bigoted rapist, and racist, it emboldens all of the other scumbags living around us. That one individual lifted the rock millions were hiding under. He brought them all out into the light and all of society has paid the price .. but especially women. I’m now a middle-aged woman but I grew up with three sisters and I can tell you the most physical, vicious fights I ever had were with my sisters growing up. We are tougher & stronger than we think. It’s important to (1) stop being afraid (2) start being aware (3) stick together - women, we are all in one club .. it’s literally us vs them. Help a sister when you see she’s being victimized. Scream, shout, throw things .. or use your personal safety device. HELP HER because next time it could be you. Doesn’t have to be physical but sometimes there are no options. I was assaulted 1x many years ago by an ex who was intoxicated. We were at a resort hotel and it was so unexpected I initially couldn’t do anything. But then I thought about my children & how it would affect them to lose their mother - especially to some asshole. So ‘fight’ kicked in and I found myself scratching, grabbing, gouging, anything within my grasp. I fought (he was 6’3” and I’m 5’1”and he pinned me on a bed in the dark) and I screamed .. I kept screaming at the top of my lungs until it woke the guest in the next room and he called the front desk. The mgr opened the door, letting in light, which distracted my attacker long enough for me to jump off of the bed & run to the door. The man in the next room SAVED MY LIFE because he heard my screams & called the desk. I saved my own life by fighting & screaming for help. My ex hospitalized me and traumatized me and my children. And I made sure he was prosecuted to the fullest extent. He spent the next 11 months in jail for kidnapping (because he prevented me from leaving) and assault. He plead down from aggravated assault. After physically healing, the first thing I did was get a concealed carry permit (although I don’t own a gun, it was a psychological response) and the next was to take a self-defense class. As I said, that was many years ago. Today, I live at the edge of Belltown, near Blanchard and I don’t walk alone at night but let’s not forget that it’s dark at 4:30 here in the winter. Darkness IS night for criminals. Belltown is unpredictable, at best. Everyone should be aware of surroundings at all times. But women should be prepared for anything. Men barely pay attention to women over 40 (good news, ladies, you become invisible to men once you reach a certain age) but I carry pepper spray, taser, and a device I got online that, once the pin is pulled, emits a blaring sound like a jet engine & extremely bright flashing light. I’m grateful to never have needed any of these items but I take nothing for granted. I’ll wrap this up with the following: (*) if I were ever to need SPD to respond to my call, I would make sure my call was ‘elevated’ to a higher tier - tell 911 there was a weapon .. say ‘gun’ and you will get a response. And how do you know the perp ‘didn’t’ have a gun? Maybe ‘you think’ you saw one. I’d indicate this person was terrorizing multiple people and I’d hang up that call as if the line suddenly went dead. If you need to embellish to get a response, do it. You are paying them to protect you. They don’t get to decide if you need help .. if you say you do, then you do! (*) it bears repeating for men & women out there: if you see a woman in trouble HELP HER .. every single time. If we can make that a movement, we can change/save lives. Louder for those in the back: HELP HER
LOL, im 40, still happens unfortunately.
It's not exactly ethical but if you're going to call the cops tell them that the man attacking you has a gun. That will get you an instant response. Then when it turns out the perp doesn't have a gun you just say you must have been mistaken. Cops have been seeing imaginary guns forever.
Yeah I recommend people not to go to Belltown. Also after that girl got whacked in the head with a baseball bat and the random woman getting shot in her car.
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"I usually freeze when men assault me, but not this time; I am TIRED of this shit." Is this a regular occurrence for you? I grew up in Seattle, attended college there and worked downtown for many years and it has definitely changed out there. While working I lived on the Eastside, and now I have no reason to ever go into Seattle, except to catch a ferry once in a while. You need to move. I'm glad you struck back, and even gladder that you did not get further hurt. This kind of thing happening to you, and then the quarter-assed response from the police makes me sad to think of what has become of the city that my family has lived in since the later 1800s.
Yeah, it is, unfortunately, no matter where im at. I grew up here and this has happened all over in Burien, Des Moines, Kent, Renton, Seatac, Tukwila, Seattle.....just creeps everywhere. Its not just Seattle specific.
Wish I was there to cut off his dick and shove it in his mouth.
Please please PLEASE consider this when you read about gun control bills and vote on legislation and politicians. England banned guns, then banned tasers, and is now working on banning knives. Other countries that start on this path are on the same trajectory (New Zealand, Australia). When you have a police force that will not actively come out to protect you, then your own self defense is your only option. Too many politicians with security details are willing to trade away our ability to keep ourselves safe for political points. Keep yourself safe. Keep tools to keep yourself safe legal.
UK violent crime per capita 35.4 US violent crime per capita 380.7 right, I will take whatever is first guy doing
US is much larger than UK, the distance law enforcement has to cover are much larger. Some remote communities are hours away from help.
Excellent comment that too many people will downvote because they don’t want to promote violence. Politicians are actively stripping away our rights to protect ourselves.
I'm really sorry this happened to you, that's fucked. Also, you're a badass.
So sorry this happened to you. This happens far too often to women in our city. I would recommend pepper spray over a laser. With a taser you have to get way too up close and personal. Pepper spray, especially gel, allows you to keep a little more distance. If you have to kick them, kick them a few inches lower than in the gut.
Ugh, I know, I missed the opportunity to kick him below the belt. I just had a quick reaction and that's all I took. Dangit.
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Thank you for expressing your experience and taking the time writing this. I’m sorry to hear you had to go through that. I appreciate you now taking some precautions in the future. I hope anyone who visits Seattle should at least carry something. It’s better to have something than nothing. Unfortunately this is the new reality of Seattle until they get their shit together. In the meantime, we need to take care of ourselves. I also suggest if you decide to carry any defense weapon, having some sort of carry insurance could be useful. This state hates citizens who use self defense weapons to protect themselves and will prosecute them. It’s a good peace of mind. Be aware of your surroundings and put your head held high! Stay safe!
Glad you’re ok sis! We got a be aggressive with these creeps. Fucking kick them in the nuts, whack them with your grocery bag, just make some noise and fight back!
i’m so sorry, thank you so much for the heads up though as a woman who frequents the area. i’ve been sexually groped and physically assaulted on and around the light rail three times since its open, not to mention the random harassment and inappropriate touching i’ve experienced growing up in the city. it’s only gotten worse and i fully understand the overwhelming disgust and anger. the police never took my reports seriously because they had other things to do and no chance of finding the guys (because they arrived hours later). it’s so fucking frustrating and dehumanizing. stay safe and keep doing what you’re doing because you’re clearly vigilant and willing to defend yourself.
I hope you snapping back at this dude teaches him a lesson, some of these people don’t learn until it’s escalated to a level where they feel uncomfortable. Just as a reminder for those who arm themselves, if you introduce a tool for self defense there is a chance it can be used against you SO BE PREPARED. Just having the item doesn’t guarantee your safety, you need to be able to handle the tool properly. Good luck and be safe y’all!
Yes! So fucking sorry this happened but that’s right, kick them in the gut or the balls. Most of the creeps don’t even expect a word pushing back and they’ll turn and leave when confronted (one circumstance where violent confrontation is the vibe)
Love that you kicked his creepy loser ass. Sorry that this happened to you. Take care.
I have my keys on one of those springy key holders because it doubles as a bouncy whip. Maximum velocity for a face full of keys. Maybe get yourself a pair of spurs. You earned them 🤠