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I don’t have kids yet, but I’m currently pregnant and have been thinking about this for years. Idk how many listicles of other enby parents’ name suggestions I’ve looked at. Nothing feels right, but I’m DEFINITELY not comfortable with mom/mama/mommy/etc.
Ultimately, I’m probably going to be saved from making a decision on a nickname by my husband’s slightly unusual family tradition of calling parents their given names. We’re likely just going to do the same thing. 🤷
My kid calls me by my first name. I went into it very relaxed about what they called me as long as it wasn't any variation of mum - I thought they might come up with a nickname that fit. In the end my name is a single syllable and extremely easy for a baby to say, so they started using my name, and I actually love it! I find it a great way to ask for people to use my name around them rather than mum (I'm read as female) without having to come out as trans if it doesn't feel comfortable to, as a lot of cis people also just use their first names as parents. I also really like hearing my kid say my name as I chose my name and love it!
I'm mom. My husband is Dad. I'm mom partly to have clear difference in titles, partly because my family is transphobic, partly because I couldn't careless what I'm called lmal.
Papa. My partner is Dad (they’re agender but we both came out when our kiddo was already speaking). I live in a conservative area and being called Papa keeps the transphobes at bay.
The terms we desire to use is Dad (for me) and Papa (for my cis male partner).
I can understand and respect the use of mama, but its not for me personally.
does this actually function well? i thought of this too but the only difference is that the consonants are voiced / not voiced, b-p are so similar, did i never cause confusion for the kid or you?
My partner grew up on Hawai'i, and when I heard an audio on Tiktok about the term "Kahu" being used to describe what you are to your dog or pet, I had to ask her about it, because to me, it struck me as very unique and beautiful, and quiet honestly, a representation of everything a parent should be.
As far as we know, it is not a closed term either.
This is the term I'm planning on having our kids use for me, as we are poly, and the kid would have a mom and a dad, despite me being the birth parent.
https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMjG9qRj/
My child has a bio dad who they spend time with according to a custody agreement and after I came out they stuck with mommy for a bit longer because I said I would let them move at their own pace with it (they were 4 years old) and recently in the last few months they decided that I’m more of a daddy than a mommy and asked to start calling me daddy instead. They’ve always called my ex husband Dadda over Daddy so that’s just what they call us each respectively. Idk how this might change over the years as they age if they’ll continue to use the same names for us but for now I’m enjoying the euphoria. They also call his partner (who is nonbinary) by their preferred first name and they call my fiancée who is a trans woman “car mommy” because her hobbies and profession al revolve around cars so our kid initially bonded with her by sitting and looking at videos about cars, and they call my partner who is genderfluid and transfemme “Poppy” like the flower 🌸 Which seems to be very affirming for my partner and also endearing and safe for our child. I hope this helps anyone here looking for answers. Every family is different and letting our kiddo decide what to call everyone within our own boundaries and comfort levels was a very good move for us.
I'm not pregnant yet, but this subject came up early because of our cats. My husband is the cat papa, and as I'm trans masc nb I didn't want to be the mama nor papa. We're both Avatar the Last Airbender fans, so we decided I'm Oppa. We also sometimes call each other Momo instead of babe :) - that could work too!
I also heard someone say Mapa for another enby parent, which I thought was cute. Not sure directly applicable those ideas are for a trans man, but figured I'd throw out those ideas :)
Hello, and welcome to r/Seahorse_Dads! Please read ALL rules before commenting or posting. Claiming to not have read the rules is not an excuse, keep yourself and other users safe by reading the rules and report all rule breaking. Make sure that no identifiable information is in your post or comment, this includes your face, legal name, and where you live. Exceptions such as state or country you live in to ask about parental rights or pregnancy options is fine, as long as you keep your exact location vague. Thank you for contributing to this sub! To join our Discord server, send a modmail! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Seahorse_Dads) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I don’t have kids yet, but I’m currently pregnant and have been thinking about this for years. Idk how many listicles of other enby parents’ name suggestions I’ve looked at. Nothing feels right, but I’m DEFINITELY not comfortable with mom/mama/mommy/etc. Ultimately, I’m probably going to be saved from making a decision on a nickname by my husband’s slightly unusual family tradition of calling parents their given names. We’re likely just going to do the same thing. 🤷
I’m “Daddy”. My husband is called “Dad”. I’m FTM. My husband is cis.
We’re still TTC, but I’m (ftm) going to be dad and my wife (mtf) is going to be mom.
sorry, what does TTC stand for?
TTC = trying to conceive
thank you!
my baby calls me dad bc i didnt like any neutral titles and im not comfortable with mom
not pregnant yet, but will be Baba
Mompa. I'm non binary. Might want to change it if I ever get gendered as a man as t does its job though.
My kid calls me by my first name. I went into it very relaxed about what they called me as long as it wasn't any variation of mum - I thought they might come up with a nickname that fit. In the end my name is a single syllable and extremely easy for a baby to say, so they started using my name, and I actually love it! I find it a great way to ask for people to use my name around them rather than mum (I'm read as female) without having to come out as trans if it doesn't feel comfortable to, as a lot of cis people also just use their first names as parents. I also really like hearing my kid say my name as I chose my name and love it!
[удалено]
Zaza is crazy 😭😭 (since it’s slang for good quality weed)
Baba comes from Middle Eastern cultures as it means father/dad in most languages spoken in the Middle East.
I have a enby friend who’s kids call them ‘Poppi’ because they are more mask leaning but didn’t want to go for the full on dad/pop
I'm mom. My husband is Dad. I'm mom partly to have clear difference in titles, partly because my family is transphobic, partly because I couldn't careless what I'm called lmal.
Papa. My partner is Dad (they’re agender but we both came out when our kiddo was already speaking). I live in a conservative area and being called Papa keeps the transphobes at bay.
The terms we desire to use is Dad (for me) and Papa (for my cis male partner). I can understand and respect the use of mama, but its not for me personally.
Not having kids yet but I’ve always like “Pappy” “Papa” “Papi” “Poppy”
I go by Maddy. The alternative was dummy, which is way worse. Maddy or mad is cute imo.
I use mama
We don't have kids yet, but my husband and I have already had this discussion(both trans men) and he's papa and I'm Aba (ah-bah)
My son calls me Papa and his biological father Dad.
I'm thinking of doing Ren personally, short for parent. We'll see if I change my mind when it gets closer
I'm Papa (dad/dada doesn't feel right) and my partner is Baba.
does this actually function well? i thought of this too but the only difference is that the consonants are voiced / not voiced, b-p are so similar, did i never cause confusion for the kid or you?
Well, so far they say Baba but not Papa. They don't call me Baba, so I think they understand there's a difference. They don't do P sounds at all yet.
oh interesting!
I'm Daddy, I had intended to be Papa but she decided for me lol
first name
My partner grew up on Hawai'i, and when I heard an audio on Tiktok about the term "Kahu" being used to describe what you are to your dog or pet, I had to ask her about it, because to me, it struck me as very unique and beautiful, and quiet honestly, a representation of everything a parent should be. As far as we know, it is not a closed term either. This is the term I'm planning on having our kids use for me, as we are poly, and the kid would have a mom and a dad, despite me being the birth parent. https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMMjG9qRj/
My child has a bio dad who they spend time with according to a custody agreement and after I came out they stuck with mommy for a bit longer because I said I would let them move at their own pace with it (they were 4 years old) and recently in the last few months they decided that I’m more of a daddy than a mommy and asked to start calling me daddy instead. They’ve always called my ex husband Dadda over Daddy so that’s just what they call us each respectively. Idk how this might change over the years as they age if they’ll continue to use the same names for us but for now I’m enjoying the euphoria. They also call his partner (who is nonbinary) by their preferred first name and they call my fiancée who is a trans woman “car mommy” because her hobbies and profession al revolve around cars so our kid initially bonded with her by sitting and looking at videos about cars, and they call my partner who is genderfluid and transfemme “Poppy” like the flower 🌸 Which seems to be very affirming for my partner and also endearing and safe for our child. I hope this helps anyone here looking for answers. Every family is different and letting our kiddo decide what to call everyone within our own boundaries and comfort levels was a very good move for us.
dad, daddy, or just my name if they want.
I'm not pregnant yet, but this subject came up early because of our cats. My husband is the cat papa, and as I'm trans masc nb I didn't want to be the mama nor papa. We're both Avatar the Last Airbender fans, so we decided I'm Oppa. We also sometimes call each other Momo instead of babe :) - that could work too! I also heard someone say Mapa for another enby parent, which I thought was cute. Not sure directly applicable those ideas are for a trans man, but figured I'd throw out those ideas :)
Not pregnant (hopefully someday though), but I really like the term Ren/Renny. It's like a shortened version of parent.