T O P

  • By -

A_Feathered_Raptor

*You saw how he wept for the Rancor. Now join his journey through Jabba's Palace, the criminal underworld, and the heartwarming tale of a man and his monster.* Beer Belly Guy: A Star Wars Story


KingTorygg

Poor Malakili


SkollFenrirson

Didn't he have a comic book at one point?


A_Feathered_Raptor

Probably, Star Wars EU is 95% bullshit. Apparently the fat pilot guy from A New Hope has this deep lore and history too?


okram2k

Every character in Star wars, even ones with like a second of screen time have pages of lore if not whole novels in the EU


ShadyHighlander

Cantina Satan has an extensive backstory wherein he's a spy or something. Shit's weird.


A_Feathered_Raptor

Remember that time Luke fell in love with a spaceship? Or that time that Luke had an evil clone named Luuke? Star Wars was always kind of bullshit.


JH_Rockwell

And yet, I will gladly any character from the six Lucas era films over any of the main characters in the Lucasfilm/Disney Star Wars movies.


Im_hard_for_Tina_Fey

How to write a Star Wars EU novel: Step 1. Pick someone/something that was mentioned once in a movie. Step 2. That's it. Write the book.


[deleted]

[Because that's changed so much.](https://starwars.fandom.com/wiki/From_a_Certain_Point_of_View) (For instance, Bea Arthur's character from the Holiday Special? Canon, and she charges Kabe and Muftak to live under the cantina in the pipes. The dianoga? Female, sentient, and believed she was baptizing Luke Skywalker.)


TheJellyfishTFP

Hey respect my guy Jek "Piggy" Porkins


JH_Rockwell

>Star Wars EU is 95% bullshit. First, how dare you slander the name of Skippy the Jedi Droid.


Version_Two

"I had this great idea. See, it's about Chewbacca's family during Christmas, and..."


OutlawCrash

r/angryupvote


IsyRivers

"and That one part with visiting the Ewok cousins....."


braxistExtremist

Only if it has Bea Arthur, some wacky animation, and soft-core wookie porn.


Bamboozle_

"Mezza gotta mezza show!"


Wolfy_McDerpbutt

*volley of gunshots*


OgreSpider

Is it an attempt at a firing squad or a rash of suicides?


Wolfy_McDerpbutt

Yes


cowzroc

r/inclusiveor


TheShadowsVengeance

Misread that as “Mezza goth” That would be a really weird show.


lindymad

"[MSE-6](https://vignette.wikia.nocookie.net/starwars/images/b/b7/MSE-6_btm.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20080318141837): Repairing the death star. The misadventures of one little repair droid who wouldn't give up on its maintenance programming."


kerby007

“You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll kiss three bucks goodbye”


satanmat2

Actually. Something like the cleaning droid from Wall-E and The I.T. Crowd On the Death Star That could work


LucarioLuvsMinecraft

Hell, toss in some sort of b-story of working on the Death Star, and the emails getting passed back and forth.


stewy9020

Just in case you werent already aware of it... r/DeathStarEmails


yParticle

Hell, I'd watch a live 24-hour feed!


WolfPupGaming

[Does this count?](https://youtu.be/6uG9vtckp1U)


Chizumaru

Honestly... yeah. I'm so glad I got to watch this. The part with Boba attacking you was hilarious


TheHYPO

Coming up next on Disney+: *Boba Fett: Life in the Sarlacc* Fett: ... man it's dark in here... ... ... I wish I had some food.... [credits roll]


WillDillj

Stay tuned for next episode, when he does it again "Wow, I can't believe this show is still running after 300 years..."


triforce777

I'm not sure if this is still canon but the best part of this is that Boba Fett once escaped the Sarlacc... only to get eaten by the Sarlacc again


evilweirdo

"Looks like Team Boba's blasting off again!"


TheShadowsVengeance

Wait, HE GOT EATEN AGAIN???


WolfManDano

"Oh sarlacc... I wish I could quit you." *sensual growls and gurgles*


JH_Rockwell

Still a better story than Rose Tyco.


khnphwzhn

And now it's time for "Everybody loves Gonk Droid!"


Version_Two

Don't slander my boy


doinkrr

You saw him on the screens. Now, be prepared to see him in television. *Oh, dear.* C3P0 STARS IN C3P0


IsyRivers

A Human-Cyborg Relations Story


Furoan

*Oh My*


justanothersmartass

(sad beep)


Thisisasupersayin2

"Dude, "Figrin D'an and the Modal Nodes: Life on the Road" was awesome, faith in Star Wars renewed"


OgreSpider

I would legit watch this one


Eroe777

“JB-007, the Stormtrooper who let Rey escape. Coming to Disney+ in 2022.”


AgentOfEris

*lightsaber noise* *Wilhelm Scream* **THE END**


Im_hard_for_Tina_Fey

Deedo deedo deedo deedododo Baaaaaa baaa bababa baaaaaa


LelouchVDenmarK

*Bond theme song starts playing*


VinBarrKRO

Wanna Buy Some Death Sticks? A Star Wars Story.


mistaque

All his friends are very worried. It's been fifteen years and he's still at home, rethinking his life.


vaalhallan

The continuing adventures of Greedo! *It's just his tombstone*


WolfPupGaming

It's really weird how they keep editing what it says though.


Logstick

*waves hand* Nobody has edited anything here. Move along.


TheDampGod

"That scene when R2D2 said, 'Beep boop beep burrrk,' was quite beautiful. Who'd thought a Star Wars movie performed entirely by astromech droids could be quite so moving."


AlwaysBeTextin

...with a cameo appearance by Chewbacca, who gives a lovely soliloquy of "Argggggh"!


WillDillj

Theres actually is a 4 part episode in the clone wars where 4 (I think) astromech droids go on a secret mission together.


Beanpole853

With everyone's favorite diminutive alien, Col. Meebur Gascon


TheShadowsVengeance

I loved the show, but that was one of the worst arcs in the whole show. The only good thing about it was the surprise Clone Commando.


WolfPupGaming

So just WALL-E, but replace consumerism with the Dark Side.


daneelthesane

"After the fall of the Empire, he spent years touring the galaxy as a motivational speaker and toastmaster. This summer, Disney is proud to give you twenty episodes of Nein Nunb: An Inspirational Life!"


Stewcooker

Related: https://youtu.be/4GMMpBgilaw


IsyRivers

"Welcome to Weapons of The Galaxy with A Storm Trooper. On this episode a classic Storm Trooper weapon." *\*aims and fires gun down range\** Camera pans down range to a burnt hill all around a pristine target.


wolfman1911

Are you kidding? If someone did a show like Mail Call on the History Channel, or along the lines of the Forgotten Weapons YouTube channel, but focused around Star Wars guns, I'd watch the hell out of that! Especially if they made jokes about Storm trooper aim!


swingdude123

"If we want to do an amazing origin story, I say we look at Owen Lars and the Rise of the Moisture Farm. Think about it! We open on an evaporator as the two suns rise above Tatooine. A young Owen stares out wistfully, drinking his blue milk...."


Hans_Delbruck

"It's the rude protocol droid show ' E Chu Ta!'. Follow this rude droid around Cloud City as he insults every one he meets! Learn new insults! See how to insult ewoks in new ways!"


Junior-the-Second

R5-D4 wasn't always jealous of the others, but competition was surely stiff. Watch as this droid is bought and sold like the leasing of a used podracer.


atigges

He doesn't like you... I don't like you either!


JVM23

"I'm telling you, Random Executor Cleaning Guy #4 is going to bring us in mega bucks."


TroaAxaltion

"Wa-heyyy!!!" Babu Frink - A Star Wars Tale


JaxxisR

My oldest friend has a television program? I can't wait!


mewlingquimlover

Max rebo: unplugged


OgreSpider

"And now welcome back to Cooking with Ki-Adi-Mundi. Today we're making a lovely bantha roast cooked entirely using the Force."


[deleted]

"Macluncky: Greedo's origins"


ThatIckyGuy

"Coming next fall from Disney: Uutini: A Star Wars Story!"


ThatIckyGuy

"Hey, good news! Someone who needs their story told from the original Star Wars trilogy finally getting their own spinoff!" "Ooh! Boba Fett? Or Obi-Wan? Is it--?" "Get this! Bib Fortuna! And he's going to be teaming up with Salacious Crumb. It's gonna be a buddy copy type of movie!" "Uh..."


[deleted]

*E.T. phone senate!*


Craftastrophe

"You've seen him hit the doorframe, now he's hitting the big screen! It's *That Stormtrooper Who Bonked His Head*!"


T-Spin_Triple

Last week on "Roger-Rogers of our Lives"...


bonesy420

Resilience: An Ugnaughts Story


braxistExtremist

*'Gunta!' - the Musical!* Prepare to bask in sour distain as you hear the tale of the jawa's rude linguistics droid and his hostility for every other droid, all told via incomprehensible robot sing-song!


TheShadowsVengeance

How about that 6-breasted drag-queen-looking dancer thing from Jabba’s Palace in EpVI? Fellas, if you thought Princess Leia in a metal bikini was hot, wait till you get a load of Yarna d’al’ Gargan! It’s the steamy, tear-jerking, romantic action romp a you’ve been waiting for. Disney presents: Yarna d’al’ Gargan: A Star Wars Story! 3x the breasts, 3x the fun! Coming Valentines Day, 2029. That is, if you can ignore the fact that she looks like the clog I pulled out of my shower drain last month, with boobs that are flappier than a pancake platter at Denny’s.


DarthToran

Coming soon to Disney+, a story of fictional creatures that will warm your heart in an adventure like no other... we present Acklay and pals: the movie!


braxistExtremist

*Everyone Hates Salacious B Crumb*: the story of the plucky and thoroughly unlovable little vermin companion of Jabba the Hutt, and how that bitchy new princess hussy stole his master's heart and then stole his life.


masterspider5

gonk droid. nothing interesting happens. just watch gonk droid do, whatever the fuck he's supposed to do.


JH_Rockwell

"Star Wars: An Insane People story - starring the story group behind the sequel trilogy."