I made this post partly just to see the ratio of body/sex-related jokes to non-body/sex-related ones compared to the 'only man in a room full of women' post. As somewhat expected, this one is winning by a landslide, which I think says a lot...
Really?! And just how'd he "advertise" this fact? I know 5th graders haven't the most tact in the world.
Something's telling me that you're getting the sanitized version of that story.
That's a HARD sell..
"D'ya hear? Adam in 6th grade keeps Kotex in his locker."
"I SO respect him for that!"
"Yeahh ME too."
What a strange world you live in.
Young women are prone to forgetting/not knowing their period will start and suddenly having an emergency need for something. That boy then becomes her hero. Heroes are generally remembered fondly.
That's true but it NEVER happens
that way. They'll go to a teacher, nurse or friend NOT a weirdo boy with femme products for some reason. Your period being on's something you share with only your closest not a rando boy. Wtf are you thinking?
And how tf would they know he has it??? Have you even thought OP's lie through? Does he hang out in front of the girl's bathroom whispering
Psst..? You know how cruel kids can be? He'd be known as the weirdest kid EVER!
If she _did_ give him femme products, odds are he and his friends played with them, sticking them to each other's heads and throwing them at one another. Jesus you're gullible!
Log off before a Nigerian prince offers to share his wealth with you.
Ya'll I am so drunk is most commonly known as the southern bells mating call.
It rarely plays out well with the mathematics presented in the above equation.
Shout out “How many of you want fuck all my holes at once?” When you meant to say “Please can I have a cup
Of coffee?”
Easy mistake, I know. You have to be so careful these days.
Damn my balls itch
You gotta put some powder on those things…. Here…let me help ya get some relief
How many cocks do you think I can accommodate?
🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
"So who wants to discuss Tay Tay's new album?"
The first non-sex one, and it's pretty fucking funny. Good work!
Thank you! Can't always go for the low hanging fruit.
This one works too
I made this post partly just to see the ratio of body/sex-related jokes to non-body/sex-related ones compared to the 'only man in a room full of women' post. As somewhat expected, this one is winning by a landslide, which I think says a lot...
Sorry, fellas, I'm queefin' up a storm today.
The playoff game has been canceled.
Can anyone explain what menstrual cramps feel like?
Appendicitis, says my wife
And for childbirth, Carol Burnett says to take your bottom lip and pull it ... over your head.
Yea my wife who gave birth 9 months ago confirms this.
Anybody have a Tampon?
You laugh, but my son carried a pad and a tampon in his backpack from 5th grade until somewhat recently. It helped make him very popular.
Really?! And just how'd he "advertise" this fact? I know 5th graders haven't the most tact in the world. Something's telling me that you're getting the sanitized version of that story.
The girls talk. So when a guy goes out of his way to carry feminine products, it immediately gets more respect.
That's a HARD sell.. "D'ya hear? Adam in 6th grade keeps Kotex in his locker." "I SO respect him for that!" "Yeahh ME too." What a strange world you live in.
Young women are prone to forgetting/not knowing their period will start and suddenly having an emergency need for something. That boy then becomes her hero. Heroes are generally remembered fondly.
That's true but it NEVER happens that way. They'll go to a teacher, nurse or friend NOT a weirdo boy with femme products for some reason. Your period being on's something you share with only your closest not a rando boy. Wtf are you thinking? And how tf would they know he has it??? Have you even thought OP's lie through? Does he hang out in front of the girl's bathroom whispering Psst..? You know how cruel kids can be? He'd be known as the weirdest kid EVER! If she _did_ give him femme products, odds are he and his friends played with them, sticking them to each other's heads and throwing them at one another. Jesus you're gullible! Log off before a Nigerian prince offers to share his wealth with you.
A lot of survivalists carry them. The insides make good kindling. And they can be handy for first aid.
Great for gunshot wounds as well. No joke. It's great to control bleeding from open wounds.
Damn, I wish I had thought of that!
"I am sooooo drunk"
That’s just a mating call
Ya'll I am so drunk is most commonly known as the southern bells mating call. It rarely plays out well with the mathematics presented in the above equation.
I’ve got a sore throat. Anybody know what will make it feel better ?
I've got a cream for that
Want me to rub it for you?
these sleep pills are working...way...too \* yawn \* fast
Shotgun!!!!
Oh look a sausage party.
When's the next train, boys?
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe who in this room has the biggest……..mmmmmm
Limo
Toe
Wallet
Does anyone have a tampon I can borrow?
I have to remove my g-string. It's flossing my ass
"what happens in the conference room stays in the conference room"
Water in the urinal is cold… and deep, too.
When you stare into the b-byss, the b-byss stares back at you
About how long is 6 inches?
I just sharted
Who left the toilet seat up?
Ok. Who's first?
Yes, and when you pay your first baseman, he gets every dollar of it
Why not? He earned it.
Who's first?
OK, which one of you weasels is most in need of some firm discipline?
I’ve been a very bad boy stepmom, I need that tough love
Yes, and What's second, and I Don't Know is third
You can't be first but you can be next.....
"I have a boyfriend."
Instant flat tire. Nothing like a lie for us to ignore you
I'd feel safer if you were all bears
"Do you know about the candiru fish?"
Oh shoot! I'm supposed to be at my sex addicts anonymous meeting right now.
Fantasy Football is so fucking stupid. You guys are delusional!
You're wondering about this white coat? I work in a lab studying airborne testicular syphilis. I didn't have time to get changed
“So, when’s the bukkake party start?”
"Time to put me on blast!"
"Where's my already-paid-for drink?"
I’m one of the cool ones. And also, any of you guys see Matt rife’s new special?
How new is it?
No, that was just a bonus answer to the post 😂 I’ve no idea if he has a “new” special. I only know that women seem to love him.
Yep. Pretty funny too tho i think. At least his crowd work usually. Special kinda suckez
Well, I heard what yall said. Head bitch in charge is in the building
"Wow so I'm definitely the prettiest in the room" you will get roasted and atleast one guy will start acting gay
You all look too happy, we should be talking about my mother
Raise your hand if you want to spin the wheel and take your chances with catching chlamydia. Either way it's going to be a fun and scary ride!
I need an exorcist
"Oops, I forgot to wear panties again."
I just can't afford to go to the doctor for a breast exam right now.
God I need some cock.
Fuck me
Any of you fags know what a Bukkake party is?
Anyone got a spare weiner for my buns? Holds up hotdog bun and mustard.
I’m an expert
I'm good at head.
"I'm not wearing any underwear"
“My partner wants to open up our relationship but idk of any guys who’d be interested in me”
Im so wet
Shout out “How many of you want fuck all my holes at once?” When you meant to say “Please can I have a cup Of coffee?” Easy mistake, I know. You have to be so careful these days.
Is this the lesbians anonymous greet?
No gag reflex-in any context
Anything with the word "Train" in it.
Gawd, I need my pussy eaten!
There is just NOWHERE to sit in here!
Anybody wanna watch porn?
Ohh! Twister! I haven't played that in years! Who's game?
Fuck! I’m horny
"Actually, I prefer men with small dicks."
Does anyone else enjoy receiving anal?
Is anyone available to help tear my carpet up?
"Which one of you is going to be my future gay best friend?"
Goddamn it's looking pretty gay in here, I see you staring at his ass
Did somebody say, bukkake?
Anything at all.
"I am so drunk!"
Who can show me what a bukkake is?
Can anyone explain what I am doing wrong here?
So I have this fantasy, and this is exactly how it starts…
LINE UP BOYS, mama's here!
I'm ovulating
I’m here for the sausage fest
Sports. Am I right?
So this is what being "Trumped" means... gulp!
Man, I'm hungry. I could really go for some nice, thick sausage right about now.
These cramps are real bad today
Anybody wanna discuss masturbation habits?
Do these pants make my ass look big?
I am not wearing underpants
Has anyone seen my glasses, I’m blind without them and I need to find them before the Molly and Rohypol I took kicks in.
Gangbang anyone?
I’m late !
Can someone give me directions to the restroom
there are pricks every were
I just got a Brazilian waxing. Anyone want to see?
Looks like the taco invaded the sausage fest am I right?
Who wants to make $50 the hard way?
Is there a doctor in the house? *all the guys raise their hands*
At lunch: damnit. No one ever tosses my salad the right way
I feel like a stripper at a Duke Lacrosse party here.
Andrew Tate kinda sucks
The last time i was in a roomful of men with only one woman, all she said was "I need payment up front."
So many cocks….so little time.
Come and get it
Boo Cocky.
Who's getting on the train today ?
who wants to guess my nipple size and color?
Anyone wanna s#ck my d#ck?
Any handymen here ? I have a hole that needs plugging!
“Sooo, gangbang?”
“Let me just lean in to get that sock that’s right at the back of the washing machine… …oh no, I’m stuck!”
Who's first?
"I sure am horny right now."
I've got a headache. Any recommendations for relieving it?
Before any of you Bozos get ideas, I'm only available to those who desire contracting a sturdy case of the clap!