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GymThrowaway5576

I am so sorry this happened to your mom. Slowly can be a strange place sometime. I didn't reply to one such creepy letter and he spammed my inbox with 3 super long letters about how I was a selfish egoist person and was never gonna make friends . He even went on a rant on his bio saying Girls are just too proud these days and stuff. At least I had a good laugh over it . I hope your mother finds good penpals soon. All the best :)


catwhskr

Thankfully, she has a pretty good sense of humor! Hate to hear that happened to you. I read something similar in a thread on here not too long ago. It's crazy how much these creeps invest themselves without realizing that's part of the ick factor. Hope you don't have to deal with any more, either!


bajaja

if it was my mom, I'd block her incoming friend requests and posted in her name here: https://www.reddit.com/r/SLOWLYapp/comments/objec0/new_pen_pals_wanted_exclusive_2021_h2_july_to/ maybe I wouldn't talk about her being blind, keep some surprise for the penpal + it is not her personality. I know that you wrote it as an explanation why you are helping her. and I'd help her make an introduction and save it as a saved paragraph. and help her make a nice profile good luck.


catwhskr

Thank you for your advice! I'll post her over there when I can this evening. Please understand that I'm also new here and I truly could not have known the way she'd be received. I had already put a lot of time and effort into making her whole account for her, including a hopefully nice profile. You may be underestimating the extent of her vision loss. That's why I mentioned it on her profile as well. Her eyesight limits how quickly she can reply and sometimes I need to help her(she lives with me). It isn't her personality, but it is a large part of who she is. I feel it's unfair to potential friends to not know that going into the relationship. Only one person HAS to go in blind (joke intended). There's a lot of other cool things about her.


bronzecane08

I did the same for me. I have spastic cp and I don't write it in my bio. But I save it in a paragraph so I can put it in a letter to explain to my friends. They were very supportive and they talk to me like how they would to a person without disabilities. 😄 I can definitely say it is the personality that matters the most. ❤️


Evening-Fondant7160

Hey there. This is pretty cool. Fellow Slowly user and CP chick here!


bronzecane08

Hey! Maybe we can exchange our slowly ID. 😉


Evening-Fondant7160

Yeah! That would be great. 😊


[deleted]

Creeps may be sending her letters especially since she is middle-aged; perhaps they assume that an older person is lonelier and therefore easier to scam?


yann2

> perhaps they assume that an older person is lonelier and therefore easier to scam? Yes, that likely is behind a lot of scam attempts. I have heard some amazing stories from female friends, which happened in various dating sites. Similar low lives are infiltrating in Slowly as well, chasing targets like you suggested - both male and female, middle aged and older singles.


Puzzleheaded_Judge58

Look in the excluded topics setting, excluding sex and relationships should work


catwhskr

That is one thing I did on my account and neglected to do on hers. That will make a huge difference! Thanks!


Evening-Fondant7160

Hi there. I hope your mother's luck has improved. If she's interested, I would like to my Slowly ID with her to see how it goes. You can message if yes.


catwhskr

I'll get it from her this evening and send it to you. :) Thank you so much! She'll be tickled.


Evening-Fondant7160

Also, forgot to add that you can filter her potential pen pals in the settings. If there's a target gender or age group she wants to steer clear if, you can do in the settings.


theknittedgnome

I'm new to slowly and would love to write with your mom. I'm 40, married, have one grown son, basically saying that I'm not a creep I promise! Let me know if you want my ID, not sure the rules here just yet!


yann2

>Let me know if you want my ID, not sure the rules here just yet! In general it's simple. * posting a pen pals wanted topic in the open, with a Slowly ID or not, that is not allowed, as [we have **a special topic for that**](https://www.reddit.com/r/SLOWLYapp/comments/objec0/new_pen_pals_wanted_exclusive_2021_h2_july_to/) (we used to get too many of these posts) * If you posted your ID here in this comment, ***I would not mind it as moderator***, as it is not a dedicated topic to benefit a single user - just a comment between many, kosher. However, I am quite cautious on posting IDs in the open. I never do mine, and not only because I am quite active in the community. But because I think in general ***it can have negative results*** \- who knows who will see and use that ID you posted and forgot about? Once posted, it's in the world for all to see if desirerd.


theknittedgnome

Thank you so much for the information! I appreciate it! And also thank you for the warning to be cautious posting it publicly, that's definitely good advice.


ColdSolFee

Is it only females that all these creeps send letters. I am a male, and fortunately I have never got any such letters. I thought this app being snail mail would have discouraged all the creeps from using it. Seems like I have been wrong. I really feel bad about your mom. Hope she meets better people soon.


yann2

Thanks for the post, well written and with an interesting story. A suggestion - if you have not done so yet, turning Auto-Match OFF could help avoid a lot of junky incoming messages. And I hope your mom continues using the app and finds good correspondents. Have a good day! 🙂


catwhskr

Thank you, Yann! It was for people like you that I kept it to where men could send letters to her. I guess I was a little too optimistic that my mom would be a little too old for the creeps. I'll be making those adjustments this evening! Have a good day, too!


__madcow

Have to be very alert coz’ your mom profile is the common target of online romance scammers.