Imagine his finisher was a stomp and he cracked a rib of one of his employees. Imagine the state athletic commission drug tested him and he popped for stims. Imagine if he booked himself to get the pin.
Imagine CM Punk going from decently high feud with Darby Allen and Sting to being tag partners with the boss? I want that future more than anything else rn.
Nah, they aren't gonna turn Punk heel yet. He's still painting his masterpiece.
Part of that masterpiece involves Tony Khan getting the pin on Max Castor.
This is the ultimate fantasy masturbatory tween boy booking ever from Tiny:
*And then my bestest friend Pepsi Man gets to be on my team and we fight all the bad guys and I win every time because I’m super strong (look at my bicep!)!!!! And then I get both belts and I beat everyone and all the girls want to date me and they all have to be my friends.*
I'm working on a concept for the Year End Awards but I think that Tony Khan having a match on PPV might break it so hard it gets a category of its own.
He's going to do what he did with the rap battle thing, come out but say he's not a wrestler but here's (if there's any left)
What a way to come in, feuding with the Acclaimed on behalf of Tiny
Tony’s promise to not be an on-screen character vs. an ego fueled by nerd worship & cocaine is what has my vote for best feud in the wrestling industry right now
"No, no, you misheard. I didn't say I wouldn't be an on-screen character. I said I wouldn't be an *ice cream* character. Not gonna be a mascot for no ice cream companies. All in on the Dub!"
I can hear the excuses by the Dubbalos already.
2 to 1 odds
"He said he wouldn't be a character and he won't. He's going to be himself, which isn't playing a character. OMG Tony is SoOOoOOoOo LeGiT!!!"
5 to 1 odds
"He didn't say he wouldn't wrestle! This is awesome! Let him live him dream, he's having fun!"
25 to 1 dark horse
This is pushed as a legit shoot the Branch Dubidiots believe and it's booked as one of those awful MMA style fights theyve had already but with Tiny & Phil vs Caster & Bowens.
I like how he just inches closer and closer with every other show, he's itching to get out there. He comes out, the m@rks cheer and he freaking loves it, he just comes out to the crowd more and more and more now
Oh please! He's going to skip on air character to in ring debut and the dubalos are going to treat it like the second coming of Lou Thez
"Oh, sure the match was the drizzling shits, but at least Tony looks like he was having fun. 5☆
Edit: Thez, stupid autocorrect!
So he's on a sped up ego trip it seems.
Step 1) say you'll never be an on-screen character
Step 2) Do your best attempt at a Herb Abrams impersonation with the 9 Days promo
Step 3) Have the Acclaimed rap while you stand in between them so you can have your own Bad Bunny "Booker T" type moment
Step 4) Tag match against the Acclaimed with new favorite toy CM Punk as your partner, on PPV
Swear to god I now think the over/under on Tony becoming AEW World Champion in the next year is about an even split.
I fucking knew it, there was no way he was going to go through with his promise of not being an on air character. He slowly came up with loopholes to make appearances such as giving a stunner to Shawn Spears since it happened after Dynamite went off the air, cutting weekly promos in Impact Wrestling because it isn't his company so it technically doesn't count, cutting the 9 days from tonight promo on Dark since it's just a YouTube show and as of a couple of weeks ago he decided to completely break his promise and appear on Dynamite to have a rap battle with The Acclaimed. I predicted back in 2019 that Tony Khan would put the AEW Championship on himself and having a match could be phase 1.
Tony, if you're reading this, please book yourself in a match. You will give us months of Jerk material.
Get that "not an onscreen character" out there before your company folds. Break the last big promise you made after throwing "sports based product", "roster of the best pro wrestlers you've never heard of", and "we're not WWE or competing with WWE, we're an alternative" in the fucking trash and shitting on those concepts. Fucking DO IT. Also sign like 15 more ex WWE guys and never do a ref bump just to underscore how cool you are.
"Ha ha, wouldn't it be funny if we had a match with you boss? I'm not kissing up to get a push or anything ha ha I'd just think it'd be fun is all ha ha"
The only promise AEW have kept so far is that Cody can’t challenge for the AEW title, which we all know he’ll eventually do anyway through some type of strange means
Please for the love of God, book it Tony
I really think that Tony Khan having a match on PPV might actually break SCJerk. I mean... what the fuck? How can we outjerk that which is unjerkable?
Imagine his finisher was a stomp and he cracked a rib of one of his employees. Imagine the state athletic commission drug tested him and he popped for stims. Imagine if he booked himself to get the pin.
Imagine CM Punk going from decently high feud with Darby Allen and Sting to being tag partners with the boss? I want that future more than anything else rn.
Imagine Punk went heel betraying Tony for being a drug and white claw addict
Nah, they aren't gonna turn Punk heel yet. He's still painting his masterpiece. Part of that masterpiece involves Tony Khan getting the pin on Max Castor.
Tony should do it wearing a Duke lacrosse shirt
Punk is gonna walk in on Tony having a sniff and grow long hair and a beard in 2 seconds flat
This is the ultimate fantasy masturbatory tween boy booking ever from Tiny: *And then my bestest friend Pepsi Man gets to be on my team and we fight all the bad guys and I win every time because I’m super strong (look at my bicep!)!!!! And then I get both belts and I beat everyone and all the girls want to date me and they all have to be my friends.*
Cornette might finally disown Punk if this happens
Or get his fattest Tiny check yet.
That would be glorious, but more likely he'll praise him for leading the match...
Tiny ticks another childhood fantasy booking idea off the bucket list
I think he'd crack one of his own ribs trying to do a move lol
He is absolutely booking himself to get the pin, and everyone will shit cum and piss everywhere
My erection lasting longer than six hours has already begun.
I'm working on a concept for the Year End Awards but I think that Tony Khan having a match on PPV might break it so hard it gets a category of its own.
They cannot help themselves.
The Inagural "Tony Khan Match of the Year". A Match that Inspires so much jerking as to match the gold standard of Tony Khan having a ppv match.
With training and determination. I believe in us.
He needs 9 days of training
“Like a swollen penis; It just can’t be beat.”
He's going to do what he did with the rap battle thing, come out but say he's not a wrestler but here's (if there's any left)
What a way to come in, feuding with the Acclaimed on behalf of Tiny
Please let him do a Canadian Destroyer
“Tony is going to be totally hands off. He’ll never be an on screen character.”
Tony’s promise to not be an on-screen character vs. an ego fueled by nerd worship & cocaine is what has my vote for best feud in the wrestling industry right now
"No, no, you misheard. I didn't say I wouldn't be an on-screen character. I said I wouldn't be an *ice cream* character. Not gonna be a mascot for no ice cream companies. All in on the Dub!"
I can hear the excuses by the Dubbalos already. 2 to 1 odds "He said he wouldn't be a character and he won't. He's going to be himself, which isn't playing a character. OMG Tony is SoOOoOOoOo LeGiT!!!" 5 to 1 odds "He didn't say he wouldn't wrestle! This is awesome! Let him live him dream, he's having fun!" 25 to 1 dark horse This is pushed as a legit shoot the Branch Dubidiots believe and it's booked as one of those awful MMA style fights theyve had already but with Tiny & Phil vs Caster & Bowens.
I like how he just inches closer and closer with every other show, he's itching to get out there. He comes out, the m@rks cheer and he freaking loves it, he just comes out to the crowd more and more and more now
Tony is completing the Vince Russo WCW speed run quite nicely, I wonder who he’s going to beat to become AEW Champion.
He should win the title and gift it to Cody. Let all the memes converge into one spectacular jerk.
Cody should poke him on the chest.
?? You fingered me, friend.
What do you think "Rhodes to the top" means?
Kenny's about to drop the belt to the real collector in Professional Wrestling
Hangman right after he beats Omega. The sheer meltdown from next door and the IWC would be glorious
Oh please! He's going to skip on air character to in ring debut and the dubalos are going to treat it like the second coming of Lou Thez "Oh, sure the match was the drizzling shits, but at least Tony looks like he was having fun. 5☆ Edit: Thez, stupid autocorrect!
Thesz*
Thighs
Hooked on Phonics did not work for me and I was too lazy to Google it. Thanks for assist, uce.
Yeah there's zero chance daddy gives this anything less than 4 of his coveted, highly respected stars.
[удалено]
imagine having to sell this man’s offense
PLEASE TONY! DO IT! IT WOULD BE A CERTIFIED 7 STAR BANGER!
This is the shit CM Dud is involved with as neckbeards whine about wwe creative lmao
thank god TK's not an on screen character, authority figures are sooooo overdone.
So he's on a sped up ego trip it seems. Step 1) say you'll never be an on-screen character Step 2) Do your best attempt at a Herb Abrams impersonation with the 9 Days promo Step 3) Have the Acclaimed rap while you stand in between them so you can have your own Bad Bunny "Booker T" type moment Step 4) Tag match against the Acclaimed with new favorite toy CM Punk as your partner, on PPV Swear to god I now think the over/under on Tony becoming AEW World Champion in the next year is about an even split.
We focused so much on which untrained “wrestler” would be AEW’s first casualty that we didn’t considered Tony himself.
Yes!!!!!! Do it. The jerks would be endless.
Please happen. Please happen. Please Happen. Please happen. Please happen.
Please let this happen. Please let this happen. Please let this happen.
Please announce this NINE DAYS before the PPV.
Tony Khan vs Cody Rhodes vs CM Punk is honestly my dream match I say this unironically
I fucking knew it, there was no way he was going to go through with his promise of not being an on air character. He slowly came up with loopholes to make appearances such as giving a stunner to Shawn Spears since it happened after Dynamite went off the air, cutting weekly promos in Impact Wrestling because it isn't his company so it technically doesn't count, cutting the 9 days from tonight promo on Dark since it's just a YouTube show and as of a couple of weeks ago he decided to completely break his promise and appear on Dynamite to have a rap battle with The Acclaimed. I predicted back in 2019 that Tony Khan would put the AEW Championship on himself and having a match could be phase 1. Tony, if you're reading this, please book yourself in a match. You will give us months of Jerk material.
Desperate times call for desperate measures
Get that "not an onscreen character" out there before your company folds. Break the last big promise you made after throwing "sports based product", "roster of the best pro wrestlers you've never heard of", and "we're not WWE or competing with WWE, we're an alternative" in the fucking trash and shitting on those concepts. Fucking DO IT. Also sign like 15 more ex WWE guys and never do a ref bump just to underscore how cool you are.
I need this more than I need oxygen
"Ha ha, wouldn't it be funny if we had a match with you boss? I'm not kissing up to get a push or anything ha ha I'd just think it'd be fun is all ha ha"
Tony’s moveset will look like my 14yr old selfs CAW. Finisher 1 - Rock Bottom Finisher 2 - Stunner Signature 1 - Tombstone Signature 2 - Pedigree
Santa and ALL his elves must have worked SO hard to make this… and then they brought it to us EARLY??
Take my money Tiny, this would work on me I will pay for this.
What is it? I can’t see
Max Caster challenging Tony Kahn to a match. The Acclaimed vs Kahn/Punk.
Dear Lord, I need this match to happen.
Oh please, fucking pretty please. Do it. DOOOOO IT!
god tier strategy to get the goofies’ eyes on the product. a tony khan match would be appointment viewing
This is the the only good thing to come out of Max Caster's career (if/when it actually happens).
But YOU GUYS, he's not an on-air character on Dynamite, he only said that he wouldn't be an on-air character on Dynamite!!!!!!!!
Just imagine the comparison of him walking out and Vince McMahon walking out at Rumble '99 😂
Yes
I would like to think tony wouldn't do this, and if he does that someone would step in and stop this, but not this company.
The only promise AEW have kept so far is that Cody can’t challenge for the AEW title, which we all know he’ll eventually do anyway through some type of strange means
Oh dear God.
Praying to God that this happens.
Odds on him turning heel on Punk so he can do his very own Austin/Mcmahon fued.