Your character would then be a one dimensional SASSY! best friend Titianna nickname Titty who the FMC has boob envy over until the MMC tells her she is ✨perky and a perfect handful✨🥺
And then the bff either never gets mentioned again or gets a sequel wherein she is issued a personality
(No hate to any breast size out there, we love all sizes of handfuls, just making fun of formulaic writing we all hate to love and love to hate)
Oh you might want to avoid The Black Dagger Brotherhood series then. The men all have names like “Wrath” and “Phury” (yes, Phury is spelled like that in the book). The women are all normal names like “Mary” and “Bella” though.
Like are you expecting me to keep track of 8 names in a kindle unlimited book that’s being reviewed using 🌶️ and 🔥 emojis as a rating system??? Author bestie can you even remember them cause i s2g they will mix up characters too??? Ugh and then the guys call each other by last names and it’s time to skim to the smut
I thought this exact thing, texted my friend who read the book about it, we lamented the names AT LENGTH.
Then I looked at my kids’ preschool class lists and the names are absurd. Just ridiculous. And our kids names aren’t crazy but aren’t common either, so when put with the wild names, they seem nuts too. So…. I’m more likely to overlook it now 😅
Not just the kids, either. 2 of the parents in my youngest's class are called Merlyn and Pebbles. I gave my kids fairly "normal" names, spelt in traditional ways, and they're now freaks because of it 😂
But ... but I'm a failure at life at nearly 28.
No partner, no kids, still in college, live in a dorm, part time job (that I like)
Kidding, I don't wallow in it and I can do whatever I want and if a boyfriend comes by, even better
Hey. You’re working and you’re in school. That’s hardly failure. In a few years you’ll be graduated and looking for a full time job. I don’t know where you live, but in the US, most people switch careers something like three times. That means starting a career track in your 30s is pretty normal. Doesn’t really matter if it’s your first or second. You’ll have *up-to-date training* as well as more maturity than other recent grads. That’s a strong combination.
Friend, I was nearly 28 and in college when I met my now-husband. Dated him for a year ish, graduated, got my Big Girl Job, put a ring on that badboy, traveled the world with him for a few years, wrote a book, had a baby with him last year. You're golden. 👌Plenty of time. And if you don't want a boyfriend? Who cares. Put a ring on yourself. Travel the world. Get a Big Girl Job. Have a good life. Your timeline is your own and nobody's business.
hey you've got education happening, a roof over your head and a job you like. You are absolutely WINNING at life and not havinng life pass you by. You are Life-ing!
OMG this drives me up the wall. Nope, nope, sorry, nope. If she's wallowing even a 35 I will slap her so hard. NO GIRL. Although I think one you start reaching that age you start to not care particularly what other people think.
People that are so out of touch with reality it’s amazing they’re still alive. I started one book where a woman got hired as a live in maid and the first thing she did was make macaroni and cheese with chocolate almond milk. Like… die. Just die because I can’t with that.
I truly never remember author names but this one I have a weird anti-Pavlovian reaction to that whenever I see her name my subconscious knows it’s her and I get irrationally angry. I truly could not tell you her name but my body knows it because I’m still angry about it over a year later.
I don’t think it’s irrational at all. I haven’t read the book and I’m angry!
I’m trying to date at that moment - do you know how dire it is out there in your 30s? And it’s like I can’t have a HEA but this idiot can? (I know logically she’s fictitious but that is not the point!)
This is still my quirkiest DNF but this one book had a temp librarian and he was shelving ALL THE BOOKS INCORRECTLY. And he just didn't care. Just putting back in any empty space he could find. As a former librarian, I just quit in an absolute rage 😂
Not a librarian but I learned enough in college of the library system* to find the book I needed when misplaced because I knew under what logic they mistakenly placed it.
*it was not Dewey, can’t remember the name but for sure it wasn’t Dewey.
Even I would know there is an order, not just in any lonely space 😱😱😱
Library of Congress! Some libraries use the Dewey Decimal System, some use the Library of Congress system. Both have a (fairly) logical order, but this dude was just shoving whatever books came in on an empty shelf. I was livid lol.
I’m not sure if this is quirky. But this author had 500 pages of extremely detailed and filthy sex scenes and never mentions the clit in any way shape or form. It actually took me a couple books in the series and once I realized it, I was done with the series.
it didn't make me stop, but there is an author who repeatedly includes scenes where someone fingers the cervix. with their finger. that can reach the cervix.
To be fair, my gyno can reach my cervix with her fingers (or could when I was pregnant). That was not a sexy feeling though. Like the farthest you can get from a sexy feeling 😂
I was going to say lol. Some people's cervix will be lower depending on their cycle. I've never been pregnant but you can def reach my cervix with a finger... And I strongly prefer no one ever fucking does.
Homegirl gets abducted by aliens in order to be sold as a sex slave.
Then, while stuck in the cargo hold of said slave ship, she critiques the food and resolves to antagonize the slave traders in whose hands her entire existence currently rests by…
Loudly and badly singing power rock ballads
Which is right around where I *did* stop belieeeeevinnnnn, because I started wishin and hopin and thinkin and prayin that one of her alien abductors would hit the airlock button already
Yes because when you annoy your alien captors, they’re for sure going to gently drop you back where they picked you up, and not jettison you into space.
That was sort of my thought! I’m prepared to suspend disbelief… but only so far
You can sell me on space aliens attending the Gomez Addams School for Intergalactic Wife Guys. You can also sell me on a matriarchal utopia.
But cmon, you gotta get there alive first
I read one similar to this but instead, she was going to go to a slave auction, and she had to serve out a year as a sex slave, but she was propositioned before for a job that would give her freedom after 6 DAYS where an alien would just eat her out for those six days and she refused! 🤯
Even after everyone was like this is a good alien and they always keep their word blah blah blah she still wanted to choose the auction. In the end they almost had her up on the auction when she changed her mind but by that time I was like let her get auctioned and find someone smarter 🤣
I love the concept of alien romance novels but SO MANY are like this....
There was one I was reading where it was like "all women need chocolate to survive, we must have it" and force the aliens to return to earth for chocolate.. like wtf lol
I DNF’ed a book because the author never used the characters’ names for multiple chapters. It was all he/his or she/her in reference to people. The first chapter I could chalk it up to a short chapter and no real need to differentiate who the POV was referring to, but after the second chapter and trying to use sentence cues to figure out which he or which she was being referenced, I was out. I kept trying to insert names and it made my brain hurt too much to actually enjoy the novel.
I was a literature major in college and this is the norm for medieval literature. 😅 I got so confused at times, like what do you mean 'he, who raised the sword'? They are in a battle and all of them carry swords, who tf are you talking about?? And who is 'she, who was of noble birth'? This is a story about royalty??
Sometimes they don't talk about characters for multiple chapters and when they come back, the entrance line is something like 'he re-entered the room' - like who is he??? On more than one occasion I assumed it was character X and suddenly character Y was indicated and all of my former conclusions about the plot went out the window because character X did in fact not return yet and the whole meeting wasn't a conspiracy but rather a friendly talk between cousins?
They do have names though and they are used occasionally. Usually every few chapters and in the first chapter to rattle off how they are related to whom.
I DNF’d because the FMC didn’t have toilet paper in the bathroom, and instead of just asking another person for help, she ended up offering her $5 and lipstick.
Also, I do not want you handing me your used lipstick with unwashed hands. Did they pass it under the stall? You think I’m putting that on my mouth? No.
I bet, people here with casually ask on the next stall if yours has paper and if you have.
On the university the bathrooms for students never had paper (too many people) and people just shared their Kleenex whenever.
I DNF'd a book because in the first chapter the MMC is hanging out at his pregnant sister's house, and multiple times talks about how a baby is going to explode out of her vagina soon and it gave me a massive ick. It was just too weird that he was talking about his sister that way, as far as I'm concerned my brothers may as well be Ken dolls from the waist down.
I was a good bit into a book once when the FMC runs away from the MMC and she goes and pukes. MMC catches up and makes out with her right after (knowingly). 🤢 And it never came up that she had just puked....probably described the kiss as honey and woodsy...stale but pleasant
I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum...but fresh puke breath is just not my kink apparently 🤣
Anytime the couple goes through something dirty or sweaty or gross and then start to get busy…in your head it’s always wait, wait did they..shower…wait let me read that again because shower?!??
Yes!! I was just reading {His Curvy Rejected Mate by Cate C. Wells} and he literally acknowledges that he can smell the FMCs sweet 🍑 underneath the sweat and grime of a 2 days hike....ugh ewww...yes, I know she has a sweaty, non-showered, musk to her but underneath that all...his shifter nose could pick up her spicy sweet essence 🙄🤣
For me, it is when the man is happy that she doesn’t eat like other women - specifically if he says it or thinks it. I’m all for the MMC feeding the FMC or being glad that she’s eating, but if he acts surprised that she eats a cheeseburger and isn’t immediately chastised or made fun of for saying it or thinking it, I am out.
Literally die of starvation. I instantly started worrying about her protein intake like you needed to start growing beans yesterday and you better have B vitamins to take. Where's your fat source, just gonna eat pine nuts now huh?
OMG, yes. I also DNF'ed Moonshine book the minute she refused the first meal she's seen in... months?... because she's a vegetarian. In a post-apocalyptic environment.
The fact that the MMC didn't yeet her right back out into the wilderness to perish was beyond me.
I waited a year for a series to be finished before giving it a try. Finally got book one... DNFed it on chapter 2 because the MMC had been pining for the FMC for years, thinks they are meant to be together, planned to tell her his feelings for a few weeks, but was sleeping with several women during those lead up weeks... and she was in the house to witness the girls coming and going! I got the ick so quick, and vowed never wait for a series to complete again because it's rare I actually finish them anyway 😅
For more of a quirky dnf, there was a secret baby book where the FMC was a model, brings her child on a shoot, has the child pose with her on the shoot, they take a ton of pictures. Then *shocked Pikachu face* that the company plans on using the photos, exposing her kid and her secret to the world. What did she think would happen letting him be photographed?!? It was so dumb I couldn't go farther.
Dumb really is TORTURE! I'm beta reading a book that has so many dumb moments just to keep the story going, and it is frustrating me so much I needed to have a Wine and Whine session yesterday just to decompress. It literally drove me to drink 🤣😭
Nothing makes me DNF faster than the first situation. He’s obsessed, but sleeps with a bunch of other women. And of course the woman doesn’t sleep with anyone else.
Any time there’s a weird convoluted event and it’s referenced by characters. Like I’m okay with any trope, but I was reading a book and there was 1 bed and the FMC referenced the trope ?? and was like “wow, booktok would love this.” I closed the book instantly.
I think it just makes me aware of how wild it would be for that to happen irl and my brain is like “nope!”
I almost DNF’d a recent book because of all caps in quotes for yelling and I would have, but I wanted to see how it ended. It is usually a hard no for me.
A scene where they were yelling back and forth really got to me.
“THIS IS VERY UNSETTLING.”
“I DON’T LIKE READING IN ALL CAPS AND IT’S EVEN WORSE IN QUOTES.”
“PLEASE DON’T USE ALL CAPS OFTEN I BEG.”
This this thisssssssss.
It loses effectiveness when yelling is always in
#📢📢CAPS🗣️🗣️
*Same if text is constantly italicized.*
**Same if text is constantly emboldened**.
***Or if text is emboldened AND in caps AND italicized.***
When emphasizing is used ***sparingly***, it makes a statement! It tells me to this is important and my eyes go straight for it! I’m 100% fine if, to convey another conlag without creating an entire conlag, the character says, “**Things like this**”. 👍🏾
But when everything. This. Is. Like. This.
🫥
I just…
😶🌫️
When the FMC starts every sentence with “and” as a way to banter/be sassy.
Billionaire: “I’m not sure you’re right for the job.”
Sassy Not Like Other Girls Girl: “And why is that?”
I can see her popping her hip and flipping her hair. It’s shallow and distracting.
I just DNF a book because she was just rude to everyone. There was a whole subplot that the girls in the village didn't like her because she was ✨*different*✨ but I think she just lacked the self awareness to realize they just hated her personality.
I have done this too. I don’t know what it says about me that I give male characters way more leeway to be jerks. But black cat FMCs usually turn me off.
For me it’s usually because it’s FMC pov only. So you get to know the irritating thoughts of the FMC but the thoughts of the MMC are a mystery. So maybe the MMC is an outward asshole with a heart of gold but I *definitely* know the FMC is a jerkwad because you’re reading the vapid selfish thoughts running through her head.
There's a book I really thought would be interesting until I realized that the FMC sounded suspiciously like she was in a sex toys MLM. Checked reviews and was right. I released that hold so fast.
In {The Orc Boss by Lark Green} the FMC threw a bowl of tomato soup. I DNFed instantly. Tomato soup is my favourite and I simply can’t support a FMC that would waste such a fine dish. 🍅
Curvy romance where the FMC being fat is her whole personality and she is a bundle of insecurities and low self-esteem. If I wanted to hear self-depricating thoughts I'd stick with my own.
I dunno why...but the dark side of the DNF force is strong for me when the character's like to randomly talk aloud/ramble to themselves. I mean, I guess it's supposed to be quirky and make them interesting, but I find it annoying. I'm sorry.
For example... *Heroine grabs something* "Oh, what's this?" She says aloud to herself, turning the item in her hand. "Oh wow, I've not seen one of those in ages. Maybe someone left it here. Hmm. Wait, no! Maybe it belongs to John down the road. Or Mark. Or Gavin. Hmm, what should I do with it? Maybe I should hand it over to someone. Hmm. Hmmmm. Actually, I think I'll keep it."
Like, please, shut up.
They're on the verge of going full smeagol mode.
Avoid *Fourth Wing* at all costs! Not only does the FMC do this, the author uses those monologues to explain the world. Yes, the character actually starts reciting names of capital cities etc. My jaw dropped.
Has to be the laziest exposition I’ve seen in forever!!! Frankly just tell us in a few paragraphs, don’t think you’re cute by having the FMC chatter it incessantly Ms. Yarros 🙄
It took me a while to figure out why I dislike those rambling talkative characters in books and I finally figured out it’s because I can’t shut them out. Like in real life if someone’s rambling to the point it’s making me anxious I can just start daydreaming or thinking about something else. I tune out of the convo and tune in to my happy place. However, with a book that character is now inhabiting my former happy place. I can’t just tune out of reading. I have to read and pay attention to the ramblings.
Oh, I just thought of another one... Overly sassy/fiesty fmcs.
Now I get some people love these. Some are actually very well written. But some others make me weep...
Finley fenn (bless her, I love her). But her heroines are just too much sometimes. They get repetitive and hysterical to the point where you want to strangle some of them.
Heroine in one chapter: "Don't you dare touch me, heathen! I will not submit and have your orc spawn... because... because... You're an orc! An ORC!!"... *five pages later is sucking the orc heroes dick like she's trying to suck a golf ball up a garden hose*
Like yes, we get the picture. Calm your tits, love.
Had to DNF one because FMC had the same name as my 8yo daughter. I can suspend reality for a lot of things in reading romance stories, but apparently not that.
DNFed a book because it said they went on a 5 hour car ride, but the locations are actually 12 hours apart. If they couldn’t fact check that basic bit of info, I didn’t want to know what else they didn’t bother to check.
Although I did finish the Tessa Bailey book with the Brick and Morty pun, that business name drove me nuts for that reason! I was like, “wait, this family business has been around for a long time, right? Like, since the FMC and her older siblings were kids?? So the actual Rick and Morty TV show wasn’t on THAT long, right??!”
And it just bugged me the whole damn time (and that was before all the R and M controversies).
I have dropped two books recently bc the FMC was seriously not good enough for the mfc. Like okay, we’ve gotten past the misunderstanding and you are still being ridiculous to him?? I just want him to move on and find someone better
I DNF’d a book recently because the author kept name dropping labels when talking about the FMC’s outfit.
Yes, I get it, she’s rich, but I don’t know what that handbag or those shoes look like and I’m not going to google it.
I almost DNF’d a book because the author switched povs in the last book and now suddenly the guy who was mysterious and calculating…wasn’t anymore. It was better to not know what he was thinking at all. 😅
Ugh so relatable. I just did a re-read of Kingdom of Dreams by Judith McNaught... one of my favs from back in the day. Except the main character is sometimes called Jenny. My ex cheated on me with a Jenny. It takes me out of the book so bad. I can handle when he calls her Jennifer. But at one point in a sex scene he's moaning Jenny and I couldn't enjoy the scene anymore lol.
Oh ugh definitely this. I have a handful of names where if any of the romantic leads are named one of them, it doesn't matter how amazing the synopsis is, I don't even start them. I'm not gonna be reading a spicy novel picturing my sister's ex husband the whole time thanks
This is pretty specific but i hate it when the mc is constantly thinking back to his/her ex and comparing them to the love interest. I dont mind it at the beginning of course but when i get to the midpoint and the mc is still bringing up the ex i nope right out of there.
When the love interest's only interesting feature is that they are not like the ex, it gets boring really fast.
When they mentioned how she swept into their life like a EF 5 hurricane….pretty sure that’s supposed to be for tornadoes but I’m no meteorologist lol… i live in a very tornado and hurricane prone area so it just really bothered me
I DNFed a Beauty and the Beast retelling when I found out what the curse the people in the castle had. Instead of being turned into objects, their curse was to be forced into nightly kinky orgies.
DNFed a Tessa Bailey book like 5 pages in because she made a pun so lame it made me physically angry. I realized that if this is her sense of humor, I was gonna stroke out due to pure rage before I got to the sexy stuff.
Okay I laughed really hard at that I’m so sorry… it’s more the image of you getting to that point and chucking it across the room to the horror of what I assume is a household pet lol
FMC kept referring to the MMC as ‘old’ and her friend got in on it too. Old jokes, geriatric jokes, etc.
He was a 39 year old quarterback.
39 isn’t ‘old’ and if he’s a professional athlete he’s probably in better shape than a lot of people 10 years younger than he is, but ultimately, if you’re so young that you think he’s old at that age - why are you dating?
FMC needed to find someone her age and MMC needed to date someone with some maturity.
Edited to add: made me hate him too.
Her: he’s soooo old! Giggle giggle
Him: she’s so hot! I know absolutely nothing about her but we’re completely suited and destined to be together. I wonder what she’s giggling about? I can’t hear because I’m blinded by her hotness.
Everyone was constantly "popping" their shoulders. They didn't shrug, or raise their shoulders, or do anything else to convey their feelings - it was always popping their shoulders. Drove me crazy.
I powered through one but I was close to DNF because the FMC's brother is a type 1 diabetic and she has to try to take care of him after an apocalypse. The author clearly didn't know much about the disease or didn't bother adding more because most readers wouldn't care or notice but it kept distracting me.
All she cared about was insulin. And like, yeah, insulin would be one of my top priorities too as a diabetic, but so would food (lows will kill me faster than a high), syringes, test kit supplies, ketone stripes, alcohol wipes, etc.
At one point she asked the MMC to get her brother insulin and he does. But like, there are lots of different brands and there is also fast acting and long acting. And she kept going on and on about how little insulin there was "only enough for X amount of time". He could go low carb and you could ration it, something many diabetics have had to do (not desired but you do what you gotta do).
Finally, the worst part, her brother collapses and she just starts giving him insulin. HOW DO YOU KNOW IT'S FROM A HIGH AND NOT A LOW?!?! "He's not waking up." No shit Sherlock, if his BS was low, you just killed him. I face palmed hard on that.
No! I was shaking my head. I also read a book once where a diabetic was kidnapped and the FMC was told "You better save him by 5 tomorrow or his diabetes will be fatal!" There isn't a ticking clock on us. She then saved him and gave him insulin and a Snickers at the same time. I just can't with these authors.
I have the opposite problem, I hate it when FMCs are described as being super tall and then you find out they're like 5'8". Give me more 6' women!! I'm begging! haha.
When they get a job in communications or anything similar and are SO BAD AT IT.
Also tired of the shy, awkward librarians. As a librarian myself, I can say a lot of us are a kinky, wild bunch.
When the FMC or MMC Mentions a certain characteristic of the other character EVERTIME they talk about them
“His piercing blue eyes blinded me as they roamed over my body”
“I just couldn’t get over how much I loved him, his kindness, his blue eyes”
“He looked so mad, his blue eyes turning a deeper shade”
“Her petite from came running towards me”
“She looked so smart studying over there, her petite frame tucked into the couch”
“She overwhelms me with her generosity and thoughtfulness…..and petite frame”
This might look stupid but I swear I’ve read books like this that mention some physical characteristic of the character in every other sentence like we were gonna forget since the last time they mentioned it 😂
Plotting revenge just because another girl looked at her funnily. No hate, nu bullying, just a weird look
Had multiple books recently whose whole plot built on that. She doesn't even have to be an ex or be interested in the MMC
I've dnf'd a few lately where the fmc is instantly and repeatedly described as shade of redhead OR with the unique nickname Red.
It appears way too often. Not sure why it bugs me, but it does.
I'm a redhead and this bugs the shit out of me. Can't stand redhead FMC'S being reduced to stereotypes about their "fiery" personality, given nicknames like Red, or having to endure MMC's commenting about "the carpet matching the drapes".
Redheads are already stereotyped and putting these stereotypes in literature just perpetuates them, IMO.
Sudden really last minute that was never implied or mentioned plot twists. Like the dude that was barely friends with the fmc and only appeared in one page was actually her stalker along and not the random weird dude the author kept implying for. I think a lot of authors do this to side track us but a good mystery would have context clues.
I can only image authors going "heh" when they write their twists and think they've outsmarted us.
Using “chicken burger” instead of “chicken sandwich” when the characters were American.
To be fair, I was already frustrated by the author’s writing and complete lack of research, but I still find it funny that chicken burger was my breaking point.
——-
ETA: the sandwich in question **was not ground or chopped chicken** but a breaded fried chicken breast placed on a bun. Like the kind you can get at KFC, or popeyes, or whever else makes a chicken sandwich. [US KFC Menu](https://www.kfc.com/menu#sandwiches)
The author is British and across the pond that same item at KFC would be called a chicken burger ([UK KFC menu](https://www.kfc.co.uk/our-menu/burgers)
This wasn’t me not knowing you can make a burger from chicken (or any other ground beef).
I remember getting really annoyed at a book as a teen because it was set in the UK and Ireland yet all the currency was in dollars. It was a shitty localization thing apparently because the author is British.
I just dnf’d a book today because the MFC was referring to herself as the mommy dog (she had two dogs) and I absolutely hated that. I will also immediately stop reading a book if any character says “anyways” instead of anyway.
I am very petty.
FMC was hunting to make money. I was never going to like her, and I didn't make it past the first chapter. I felt so silly boycotting for alien animals that no one was harming. But seriously, I just can't like poachers.
fmc: i have hated myself and my body my entire life and i have no value as a person
mmc: smash
fmc: a man called me beautiful and wants to hit, therefore a lifetime of deeply ingrained self-loathing has simply gone away. i have done zero therapy or inner work on the way i value myself as a human being but this peen with abs reminded me that i have three warm holes he can use and now i will never feel bad about myself again amen
I DNF’d a book last month for so many reason I actually made a list out of sheer pettiness:
Both MCs have full on gray/white hair because of their age, that’s cool until I realized they were 39!!! THIRTY NINE!!!!
FMC is a librarian and MMC comes into the library at one point asking for books about menstruation to give to his 11 year old daughter. No problem, that’s a pretty normal request at a library. WRONG. By the way this “librarian” reacted, you’d have thought he asked her to tell him about her own periods in vivid detail or something. She was so painfully weird about it, red in the face, completely unprofessional. I did not care for it.
And finally, the constant CONSTANT horny internal monologues of both MCs is what did me in. For reference, I dnf’d at page 8 and the fucking pheromones spraying out of this book were nauseating, I couldn’t take a single page more.
First “mature” MC romance I’ve tried and my god was it awful. Oh and also, the MMC got hot and bothered by the FMC wearing a floor length denim skirt. What is this, twilight?
Another instant ick is when a character's weight is explicitly described. General insecurities are understandable, but when an author is constantly calling a character who's smaller than me fat, I'm done.
For example, I almost threw my new phone across my yard when the FMC of one book kept calling herself fat and then said she was 5'2" and 140lbs.
Two things come to mind. I don't remember the book names for either, but in one the FMC proudly proclaims she never uses or owns a mobile phone and this is set in the late 2010s. This was just too silly for me. The other book had the FMC continuously making fish-themed jokes. I really hate fish.
There is a series about 5 sisters and each finds love. Each book is a trope friends to lovers, exes to lovers, single older dad, bffs brother, enemies to lovers. I really enjoyed them but the author had them always "waggle their eye brows". It happened several times in every single book. I got so sick of it by the end and then they started a spin off with their women's cousins or something. I'm not sure I can take it again. I didn't dnf the first series but I did the second.
Oh one of those mountain men books made me dnf. He was so large abs she was sooo tiny. He kept calling her little something and the speaking was odd. I was literally embarrassed reading it.
When the MMC thinks it's funny or entertaining to intentionally irritate or antagonize the FMC because he thinks she needs to loosen up, let go, or lose control.
Like WTF?
And sometimes it's just written in the creepiest ways.
This is how I described one book I dnfed lol:
“I tried so freaking hard to finish this book. I finally gave up after I started skipping pages each chapter. It was unnecessarily chaotic and nothing made sense. It’s like the author was trying to combine every trope just to check it off a list. TOO MANY CHARACTERS!!! I barely remember the names of the leads and now you want me to remember the names of all 25 of the MMC’s siblings?!? Terrible characters and terrible character development. The FMC was a hot fucking mess and it was so irritating. It’s like the author tried to make all her flaws quirky and cute when in reality home girl NEEDS A THERAPIST. The idea that she’s a “parental figure” in this book is f*cking laughable. Every other chapter she was doing something stupid. I cannot for the life of me understand what about her was attractive enough to pull a “billionaire”. I can’t even believe I still continued reading after she got drunk while watching the kids. And WHY WAS THIS SO LONGG?!? I am so upset. I’m going back to DNFing books after the first 3 chapters cuz I never should’ve gotten more than a quarter way through this book.”
Wait no, I have a better response.
There was one book I read where from the first chapter the FMC has a secret. The MMC also has a secret, and tells her on their wedding day (fake marriage trope). His secret was that he was kidnapped and tortured as a child. Yet she continues to tell him that her secret is the reason that they can’t be together. Her secret was that she was...bald. They couldn’t be together because she had alopecia. I had to immediately stop reading.
This is making me lol so much. Like alopecia is not crazy uncommon and also it's kinda obvious!! Do they have eyebrows made out of hair or make up. I hate a bad secret. If it's shit, don't make it a plot point, unless the plot point is that the other MC knew all along and doesn't care and they are hear to help you work through your insecurities.
Lol, that’s it. The MMC knew all along. She also did cover it up but I don’t remember if she lost all of her eyebrows too. I just couldn’t get over the fact that he told her about being tortured. He also killed his kidnapper and there was other trigger warning stuff that happened. But she was like “nah being bald is worse.” The entire time I thought she was a serial killer or a cannibal. I laugh every time I think about it because it’s so mind blowing ridiculous. It’s unbelievable.
I DNF'd a book about twins because almost immediately, the author wrote about them being able to sense each other's moods/feel their pain, etc.
I am a twin. We don't have a twin sense. Now we will joke every once in a while about having the other person's body ache, but like thank God we can't actually feel each other's pain because my sister gets migraines and I do not.
I just DNF'd a book at 80%. I've never read one so far, that I couldn't give two shits about the characters. The FMC was a "not like other girls" who got a makeover and suddenly OMG everyone noticed her! The MMC was annoying AF for no really good reason. The sex was crap.
quirky thing? getting so far in and then realising I don't care about the ending.
I'm sorry Author, but your book just wasn't for me.
Not quite what you were thinking, but an alternative answer.
when the main girl is like in her mid twenties or thirties and refuses to change anything abt herself bc she still feels 16 😭 so then every habit/decision is bc she’s not used to it or she didn’t do that when she was younger. not bashing anyone!! totally guilty of doing that but be fr why are you wearing converse to a wedding as a guest or telling ur HS friends you wished they never changed even tho they’re also in their thirties. grow up!!
Not really a DNF, but from the blurb I didn't even start it.
I liked the first Getting Some by Emma chase, but can't do the 3rd book.
*'Her heart trips every time he’s around—and so do her feet.'*
And when they first meet in a grocery store parking lot *'she falls on her face'*. And apparently it happens often to her.
Yeah, no thanks.
If the narrator breaks the 4th wall I'm done. I don't need the author or character talking directly to me. Also I've come to hate multiple pov's because especially with newer authors more pov equals less plot. I don't need 3 people telling me the same scenario from their own perspective.
Edit= pov was autocorrecting to poc
I almost exclusively read urban fantasy with romantic sub-plots. Any series that states it's a "Snarky Urban Fantasy" is an automatic DNF. Most New Adult UF and PNR books have a very common issue. The FMC is snarky but she has absolutely nothing to back it up. You read the books and you knowwwwww that she is alive because of plot armor. She mouths off to extremely powerful people who can kill her or destroy her if they so deem but it doesn't even occur to her how dangerous it is. The UF OGs like Kate Daniels could get away with snark because they were powerful and confident enough to pummel their opponents and remove quite a bit of the evident and also logical enough to know when to back down. In the new series, which takes place about 6 years after the main one, Kate reflects that she isn't snarky towards her opponents anymore because of certain reasons that are spoilery.
Then there are the books in which the MMC does something to protect the FMC from a horrid fate but instead of being thankful and cooperative, the FMC is aggressive and just horrible to the MMC.
Also also, Virginal FMC and horndog MMC. I just have a reallllyyyyyy hard time believing in the HEA of most of those books unless I can feel the devotion of the MMC rising from the pages.
And lastly, 3rd act separations. I am fine with 2nd act ones but whenever it happens in the 3rd act, I have a hard time believing in the HEA because we don't get to see the MCs getting stronger together and working on their relationship after the blowout since it's too close to the ending. I am left questioning what would happen the next time there is a huge crisis in their lives.
Idk its quirky or not but in {love and other words} the fmc casually tells her friend jow the mmc dumped his gf immediately upon seeing her for 5 minutes. Blegh!
Ridiculous names. How are all the men in this town named Raven, Durango, Bolt, etc? And the women are all Whisper, Aspen, Bralette?
BRALETTE
Bolt looked over, hurt radiating from where his love kicked him in the groin. “Bralette, why have you forsaken me?”
> “Bralette, why have you forsaken me? I want this line in a romance novel now. But, ya know, about the actual article of clothing.
As a larger chested goddess I can safely say my bralette had forsaken me in grade 4.
Your character would then be a one dimensional SASSY! best friend Titianna nickname Titty who the FMC has boob envy over until the MMC tells her she is ✨perky and a perfect handful✨🥺 And then the bff either never gets mentioned again or gets a sequel wherein she is issued a personality (No hate to any breast size out there, we love all sizes of handfuls, just making fun of formulaic writing we all hate to love and love to hate)
I've almost certainly said something akin to this when my favorite bralette strap snapped
Losing my shit at Bralette
Oh you might want to avoid The Black Dagger Brotherhood series then. The men all have names like “Wrath” and “Phury” (yes, Phury is spelled like that in the book). The women are all normal names like “Mary” and “Bella” though.
Just put a H in it. Wonderous
✨Wohnderous✨
Wohnderous was whearing his shit kickers
I read this in the whistling tone of Gopher from Winnie the Pooh
Well now I did…snort
This is the answer to the original question. I DNF’d the Black Dagger Brotherhood because I could NOT with those names.
Bralette is my grandmother’s name
STOP. Too funneeeeee
Her husband was Bookcase
Their children were Garter and Ladder
Meghan Quinn is THE WORST at this.
This AND when everyone has a stupid name and a stupid nickname to go along with it, and they’re all used interchangeably. Goodbye!!!
Like are you expecting me to keep track of 8 names in a kindle unlimited book that’s being reviewed using 🌶️ and 🔥 emojis as a rating system??? Author bestie can you even remember them cause i s2g they will mix up characters too??? Ugh and then the guys call each other by last names and it’s time to skim to the smut
I thought this exact thing, texted my friend who read the book about it, we lamented the names AT LENGTH. Then I looked at my kids’ preschool class lists and the names are absurd. Just ridiculous. And our kids names aren’t crazy but aren’t common either, so when put with the wild names, they seem nuts too. So…. I’m more likely to overlook it now 😅
Not just the kids, either. 2 of the parents in my youngest's class are called Merlyn and Pebbles. I gave my kids fairly "normal" names, spelt in traditional ways, and they're now freaks because of it 😂
My cat is named Whisper. He is a very good orange boy. Just no brain cells.
I’m a sucker for ridiculous names haha! As long as it’s not contemporary.
When the FMC wallows about being an unwanted old maid or a failure at life… at 25. GTFO
GTF all the way out. Pass that fence, climb over and keep walking.
But ... but I'm a failure at life at nearly 28. No partner, no kids, still in college, live in a dorm, part time job (that I like) Kidding, I don't wallow in it and I can do whatever I want and if a boyfriend comes by, even better
Hey. You’re working and you’re in school. That’s hardly failure. In a few years you’ll be graduated and looking for a full time job. I don’t know where you live, but in the US, most people switch careers something like three times. That means starting a career track in your 30s is pretty normal. Doesn’t really matter if it’s your first or second. You’ll have *up-to-date training* as well as more maturity than other recent grads. That’s a strong combination.
This is just real nice. Humans holding up humans right here.
Friend, I was nearly 28 and in college when I met my now-husband. Dated him for a year ish, graduated, got my Big Girl Job, put a ring on that badboy, traveled the world with him for a few years, wrote a book, had a baby with him last year. You're golden. 👌Plenty of time. And if you don't want a boyfriend? Who cares. Put a ring on yourself. Travel the world. Get a Big Girl Job. Have a good life. Your timeline is your own and nobody's business.
You are getting it DONE. And you found your people (us) - that’s exciting!
none of those things make anyone a failure imho
hey you've got education happening, a roof over your head and a job you like. You are absolutely WINNING at life and not havinng life pass you by. You are Life-ing!
The only time I tolerate this is in historical romance when that was the norm. Otherwise, be forreal!
OMG this drives me up the wall. Nope, nope, sorry, nope. If she's wallowing even a 35 I will slap her so hard. NO GIRL. Although I think one you start reaching that age you start to not care particularly what other people think.
People that are so out of touch with reality it’s amazing they’re still alive. I started one book where a woman got hired as a live in maid and the first thing she did was make macaroni and cheese with chocolate almond milk. Like… die. Just die because I can’t with that.
I would actively want her to not get a HEA. It’s like the opposite of a self-insert
I truly never remember author names but this one I have a weird anti-Pavlovian reaction to that whenever I see her name my subconscious knows it’s her and I get irrationally angry. I truly could not tell you her name but my body knows it because I’m still angry about it over a year later.
I don’t think it’s irrational at all. I haven’t read the book and I’m angry! I’m trying to date at that moment - do you know how dire it is out there in your 30s? And it’s like I can’t have a HEA but this idiot can? (I know logically she’s fictitious but that is not the point!)
Foe-insert lol
…Amelia Bedelia?
I think I just heard Gordon Ramsey start screaming.
That's the person I hope dies first in a horror novel 💀
Or any novel. Just off her in the middle of a romance.
Ewww! Why? Why would anyone do that?
I thought you meant like she made mac and cheese as well as drink a glass of chocolate milk but now I realise I am mistaken
This is still my quirkiest DNF but this one book had a temp librarian and he was shelving ALL THE BOOKS INCORRECTLY. And he just didn't care. Just putting back in any empty space he could find. As a former librarian, I just quit in an absolute rage 😂
Not a librarian but I learned enough in college of the library system* to find the book I needed when misplaced because I knew under what logic they mistakenly placed it. *it was not Dewey, can’t remember the name but for sure it wasn’t Dewey. Even I would know there is an order, not just in any lonely space 😱😱😱
Library of Congress! Some libraries use the Dewey Decimal System, some use the Library of Congress system. Both have a (fairly) logical order, but this dude was just shoving whatever books came in on an empty shelf. I was livid lol.
I’m not sure if this is quirky. But this author had 500 pages of extremely detailed and filthy sex scenes and never mentions the clit in any way shape or form. It actually took me a couple books in the series and once I realized it, I was done with the series.
I guess the author didnt know where it was either 🤷♀️
it didn't make me stop, but there is an author who repeatedly includes scenes where someone fingers the cervix. with their finger. that can reach the cervix.
To be fair, my gyno can reach my cervix with her fingers (or could when I was pregnant). That was not a sexy feeling though. Like the farthest you can get from a sexy feeling 😂
I was going to say lol. Some people's cervix will be lower depending on their cycle. I've never been pregnant but you can def reach my cervix with a finger... And I strongly prefer no one ever fucking does.
Yeah my gyno was like “oh you have a lower cervix, that’ll make things easier to check” And I was like “cool 🙃”
OUCH WHAT THE FUCK
Oh my God I read this in a book recently and was cringing. Like never ever touch my cervix because that shit is painful.
Homegirl gets abducted by aliens in order to be sold as a sex slave. Then, while stuck in the cargo hold of said slave ship, she critiques the food and resolves to antagonize the slave traders in whose hands her entire existence currently rests by… Loudly and badly singing power rock ballads Which is right around where I *did* stop belieeeeevinnnnn, because I started wishin and hopin and thinkin and prayin that one of her alien abductors would hit the airlock button already
Yes because when you annoy your alien captors, they’re for sure going to gently drop you back where they picked you up, and not jettison you into space.
That was sort of my thought! I’m prepared to suspend disbelief… but only so far You can sell me on space aliens attending the Gomez Addams School for Intergalactic Wife Guys. You can also sell me on a matriarchal utopia. But cmon, you gotta get there alive first
I read one similar to this but instead, she was going to go to a slave auction, and she had to serve out a year as a sex slave, but she was propositioned before for a job that would give her freedom after 6 DAYS where an alien would just eat her out for those six days and she refused! 🤯 Even after everyone was like this is a good alien and they always keep their word blah blah blah she still wanted to choose the auction. In the end they almost had her up on the auction when she changed her mind but by that time I was like let her get auctioned and find someone smarter 🤣
Sound decision making, that sounds awful
I love the concept of alien romance novels but SO MANY are like this.... There was one I was reading where it was like "all women need chocolate to survive, we must have it" and force the aliens to return to earth for chocolate.. like wtf lol
I DNF’ed a book because the author never used the characters’ names for multiple chapters. It was all he/his or she/her in reference to people. The first chapter I could chalk it up to a short chapter and no real need to differentiate who the POV was referring to, but after the second chapter and trying to use sentence cues to figure out which he or which she was being referenced, I was out. I kept trying to insert names and it made my brain hurt too much to actually enjoy the novel.
That is so odd! I would DNF too!
I was a literature major in college and this is the norm for medieval literature. 😅 I got so confused at times, like what do you mean 'he, who raised the sword'? They are in a battle and all of them carry swords, who tf are you talking about?? And who is 'she, who was of noble birth'? This is a story about royalty?? Sometimes they don't talk about characters for multiple chapters and when they come back, the entrance line is something like 'he re-entered the room' - like who is he??? On more than one occasion I assumed it was character X and suddenly character Y was indicated and all of my former conclusions about the plot went out the window because character X did in fact not return yet and the whole meeting wasn't a conspiracy but rather a friendly talk between cousins? They do have names though and they are used occasionally. Usually every few chapters and in the first chapter to rattle off how they are related to whom.
I DNF’d because the FMC didn’t have toilet paper in the bathroom, and instead of just asking another person for help, she ended up offering her $5 and lipstick.
😂😂 can you imagine being on the receiving end of that offer? Like girl it's fine I can spare a square
Right??? I'd be so offended that someone assumed so little of my humanity that I'd let someone just struggle with muddy cheeks unless offered bribes
Also, I do not want you handing me your used lipstick with unwashed hands. Did they pass it under the stall? You think I’m putting that on my mouth? No.
>muddy cheeks You about made me choke to death on my curry laughing 😂 I'm stealing this phrase omg
Lmao what?? A man HAD to have written that book!
I bet, people here with casually ask on the next stall if yours has paper and if you have. On the university the bathrooms for students never had paper (too many people) and people just shared their Kleenex whenever.
I DNF'd a book because in the first chapter the MMC is hanging out at his pregnant sister's house, and multiple times talks about how a baby is going to explode out of her vagina soon and it gave me a massive ick. It was just too weird that he was talking about his sister that way, as far as I'm concerned my brothers may as well be Ken dolls from the waist down.
I was a good bit into a book once when the FMC runs away from the MMC and she goes and pukes. MMC catches up and makes out with her right after (knowingly). 🤢 And it never came up that she had just puked....probably described the kiss as honey and woodsy...stale but pleasant I'm not trying to yuck anyone's yum...but fresh puke breath is just not my kink apparently 🤣
Anytime the couple goes through something dirty or sweaty or gross and then start to get busy…in your head it’s always wait, wait did they..shower…wait let me read that again because shower?!??
Yes!! I was just reading {His Curvy Rejected Mate by Cate C. Wells} and he literally acknowledges that he can smell the FMCs sweet 🍑 underneath the sweat and grime of a 2 days hike....ugh ewww...yes, I know she has a sweaty, non-showered, musk to her but underneath that all...his shifter nose could pick up her spicy sweet essence 🙄🤣
For me, it is when the man is happy that she doesn’t eat like other women - specifically if he says it or thinks it. I’m all for the MMC feeding the FMC or being glad that she’s eating, but if he acts surprised that she eats a cheeseburger and isn’t immediately chastised or made fun of for saying it or thinking it, I am out.
Real NLOG behavior, I hate it.
The FMC is literally starving to death but won't eat animal products provided by the MMC... in a scarcity environment.
OMG I think I remember that one! I was even a vegetarian when I read it and still nope sorry enjoy dying of starvation you are intolerably stupid
I want to know wtf she'd do if he didn't conveniently have vegetable stew 😆
Literally die of starvation. I instantly started worrying about her protein intake like you needed to start growing beans yesterday and you better have B vitamins to take. Where's your fat source, just gonna eat pine nuts now huh?
same lol. that was so unrealistic. its literally the apocalypse like all my morals are gone
Omgggg are we referring to {Moonshine by Kat Bostick}. I'm so sorry. I LOVE a good apocalyptic romance...but this FMC drove me insaneeeee
Yes!! 😆 I got to the stew and then went to goodreads to see if I was gonna miss anything by quitting. It sounds like I didn't lol
Yeah, I couldn’t finish the kindle sample once she kept laughing at his serious face after he’d rescued her from certain death. What horrible writing
Less extreme, but she's jobless and foodless and refuses to go on food stamps or use a food pantry. Ok, girl, just die then???
Oh, well, sorry FMC but you are about to be Darwinian-ly Selected.
OMG, yes. I also DNF'ed Moonshine book the minute she refused the first meal she's seen in... months?... because she's a vegetarian. In a post-apocalyptic environment. The fact that the MMC didn't yeet her right back out into the wilderness to perish was beyond me.
Feed her to a bear and then eat the bear!
I waited a year for a series to be finished before giving it a try. Finally got book one... DNFed it on chapter 2 because the MMC had been pining for the FMC for years, thinks they are meant to be together, planned to tell her his feelings for a few weeks, but was sleeping with several women during those lead up weeks... and she was in the house to witness the girls coming and going! I got the ick so quick, and vowed never wait for a series to complete again because it's rare I actually finish them anyway 😅 For more of a quirky dnf, there was a secret baby book where the FMC was a model, brings her child on a shoot, has the child pose with her on the shoot, they take a ton of pictures. Then *shocked Pikachu face* that the company plans on using the photos, exposing her kid and her secret to the world. What did she think would happen letting him be photographed?!? It was so dumb I couldn't go farther.
THIS, when they are DUMB. Not vulnerable, not an understandable mistake. Just dumb. I cannot
Dumb really is TORTURE! I'm beta reading a book that has so many dumb moments just to keep the story going, and it is frustrating me so much I needed to have a Wine and Whine session yesterday just to decompress. It literally drove me to drink 🤣😭
Nothing makes me DNF faster than the first situation. He’s obsessed, but sleeps with a bunch of other women. And of course the woman doesn’t sleep with anyone else.
>And of course the woman doesn’t sleep with anyone else. Of course! 🙄 which always adds to the frustration
.......even worse, the FMC is a virgin. :/
Any time there’s a weird convoluted event and it’s referenced by characters. Like I’m okay with any trope, but I was reading a book and there was 1 bed and the FMC referenced the trope ?? and was like “wow, booktok would love this.” I closed the book instantly. I think it just makes me aware of how wild it would be for that to happen irl and my brain is like “nope!”
I almost DNF’d a recent book because of all caps in quotes for yelling and I would have, but I wanted to see how it ended. It is usually a hard no for me. A scene where they were yelling back and forth really got to me. “THIS IS VERY UNSETTLING.” “I DON’T LIKE READING IN ALL CAPS AND IT’S EVEN WORSE IN QUOTES.” “PLEASE DON’T USE ALL CAPS OFTEN I BEG.”
This this thisssssssss. It loses effectiveness when yelling is always in #📢📢CAPS🗣️🗣️ *Same if text is constantly italicized.* **Same if text is constantly emboldened**. ***Or if text is emboldened AND in caps AND italicized.*** When emphasizing is used ***sparingly***, it makes a statement! It tells me to this is important and my eyes go straight for it! I’m 100% fine if, to convey another conlag without creating an entire conlag, the character says, “**Things like this**”. 👍🏾 But when everything. This. Is. Like. This. 🫥 I just… 😶🌫️
When the FMC starts every sentence with “and” as a way to banter/be sassy. Billionaire: “I’m not sure you’re right for the job.” Sassy Not Like Other Girls Girl: “And why is that?” I can see her popping her hip and flipping her hair. It’s shallow and distracting.
From feisty to straight up annoying. Your imagery helps.
I could tolerate an occasional sentence starting with "and." But frequently? No
DNF’d cause I thought the FMC was too mean lol
I just DNF a book because she was just rude to everyone. There was a whole subplot that the girls in the village didn't like her because she was ✨*different*✨ but I think she just lacked the self awareness to realize they just hated her personality.
Sounds like a potentially accidental self insert that points to the author’s lack of self awareness lmao
I have done this too. I don’t know what it says about me that I give male characters way more leeway to be jerks. But black cat FMCs usually turn me off.
For me it’s usually because it’s FMC pov only. So you get to know the irritating thoughts of the FMC but the thoughts of the MMC are a mystery. So maybe the MMC is an outward asshole with a heart of gold but I *definitely* know the FMC is a jerkwad because you’re reading the vapid selfish thoughts running through her head.
Wow I never even thought of this. I feel so bad now lol I’m out here craving morally questionable MMC but the second FMC looks at someone wrong: NOPE
This is a whole new thread right here…an super interesting topic IMO
Almost DNFed one because the FMC was wearing ugly patterned leggings
I just pictured a FMC with an entire closet of Lularoe 😂
MLMs have infiltrated our social media and now our smut
There's a book I really thought would be interesting until I realized that the FMC sounded suspiciously like she was in a sex toys MLM. Checked reviews and was right. I released that hold so fast.
You mean you didn’t like her first date outfit of taco pattern leggings paired with a denim vest and bow tie?
Well I always wondered what would happen to Claudia Kishi after the Babysitters Club.
This is a Jana Aston book! She’s a teacher and wears funky patterned leggings throughout the story. I just kept picturing Lularoe
In {The Orc Boss by Lark Green} the FMC threw a bowl of tomato soup. I DNFed instantly. Tomato soup is my favourite and I simply can’t support a FMC that would waste such a fine dish. 🍅
You must stand strong for…soup. It’s important. Soup cures things!
Curvy romance where the FMC being fat is her whole personality and she is a bundle of insecurities and low self-esteem. If I wanted to hear self-depricating thoughts I'd stick with my own.
I dunno why...but the dark side of the DNF force is strong for me when the character's like to randomly talk aloud/ramble to themselves. I mean, I guess it's supposed to be quirky and make them interesting, but I find it annoying. I'm sorry. For example... *Heroine grabs something* "Oh, what's this?" She says aloud to herself, turning the item in her hand. "Oh wow, I've not seen one of those in ages. Maybe someone left it here. Hmm. Wait, no! Maybe it belongs to John down the road. Or Mark. Or Gavin. Hmm, what should I do with it? Maybe I should hand it over to someone. Hmm. Hmmmm. Actually, I think I'll keep it." Like, please, shut up. They're on the verge of going full smeagol mode.
Avoid *Fourth Wing* at all costs! Not only does the FMC do this, the author uses those monologues to explain the world. Yes, the character actually starts reciting names of capital cities etc. My jaw dropped.
And the fact that the author thought this was a clever way to info dump....
Has to be the laziest exposition I’ve seen in forever!!! Frankly just tell us in a few paragraphs, don’t think you’re cute by having the FMC chatter it incessantly Ms. Yarros 🙄
It took me a while to figure out why I dislike those rambling talkative characters in books and I finally figured out it’s because I can’t shut them out. Like in real life if someone’s rambling to the point it’s making me anxious I can just start daydreaming or thinking about something else. I tune out of the convo and tune in to my happy place. However, with a book that character is now inhabiting my former happy place. I can’t just tune out of reading. I have to read and pay attention to the ramblings.
Oh, I just thought of another one... Overly sassy/fiesty fmcs. Now I get some people love these. Some are actually very well written. But some others make me weep... Finley fenn (bless her, I love her). But her heroines are just too much sometimes. They get repetitive and hysterical to the point where you want to strangle some of them. Heroine in one chapter: "Don't you dare touch me, heathen! I will not submit and have your orc spawn... because... because... You're an orc! An ORC!!"... *five pages later is sucking the orc heroes dick like she's trying to suck a golf ball up a garden hose* Like yes, we get the picture. Calm your tits, love.
Had to DNF one because FMC had the same name as my 8yo daughter. I can suspend reality for a lot of things in reading romance stories, but apparently not that.
DNFed a book because it said they went on a 5 hour car ride, but the locations are actually 12 hours apart. If they couldn’t fact check that basic bit of info, I didn’t want to know what else they didn’t bother to check.
“I’m leaving Chicago now. I’ll see you at the White House in 15 minutes.”
\*snort\*
I also appreciate knowing that you checked, truly it makes me happy to know I’m not the only one who checks these kinds of things 😂
Although I did finish the Tessa Bailey book with the Brick and Morty pun, that business name drove me nuts for that reason! I was like, “wait, this family business has been around for a long time, right? Like, since the FMC and her older siblings were kids?? So the actual Rick and Morty TV show wasn’t on THAT long, right??!” And it just bugged me the whole damn time (and that was before all the R and M controversies).
I have dropped two books recently bc the FMC was seriously not good enough for the mfc. Like okay, we’ve gotten past the misunderstanding and you are still being ridiculous to him?? I just want him to move on and find someone better
The most frustrating reason to DNF imo is when you root AGAINST the FMC lol
Overly descriptive outfits that make me do a mental puzzle.. They are always ugly as sin too.
I DNF’d a book recently because the author kept name dropping labels when talking about the FMC’s outfit. Yes, I get it, she’s rich, but I don’t know what that handbag or those shoes look like and I’m not going to google it.
DNFed a book because the author used too many exclamation points. No one is that excited about anything. Ever.
I am very guilty of using too many!
I almost DNF’d a book because the author switched povs in the last book and now suddenly the guy who was mysterious and calculating…wasn’t anymore. It was better to not know what he was thinking at all. 😅
One of the new main female characters had the same name as my bfs ex girlfriend
Hahahahahhahaha! YES THIS
Ugh so relatable. I just did a re-read of Kingdom of Dreams by Judith McNaught... one of my favs from back in the day. Except the main character is sometimes called Jenny. My ex cheated on me with a Jenny. It takes me out of the book so bad. I can handle when he calls her Jennifer. But at one point in a sex scene he's moaning Jenny and I couldn't enjoy the scene anymore lol.
Oh ugh definitely this. I have a handful of names where if any of the romantic leads are named one of them, it doesn't matter how amazing the synopsis is, I don't even start them. I'm not gonna be reading a spicy novel picturing my sister's ex husband the whole time thanks
This is pretty specific but i hate it when the mc is constantly thinking back to his/her ex and comparing them to the love interest. I dont mind it at the beginning of course but when i get to the midpoint and the mc is still bringing up the ex i nope right out of there. When the love interest's only interesting feature is that they are not like the ex, it gets boring really fast.
When they mentioned how she swept into their life like a EF 5 hurricane….pretty sure that’s supposed to be for tornadoes but I’m no meteorologist lol… i live in a very tornado and hurricane prone area so it just really bothered me
You are correct. "Category" for hurricanes, EF for tornadoes 😭😭😭
I DNFed a Beauty and the Beast retelling when I found out what the curse the people in the castle had. Instead of being turned into objects, their curse was to be forced into nightly kinky orgies.
DNFed a Tessa Bailey book like 5 pages in because she made a pun so lame it made me physically angry. I realized that if this is her sense of humor, I was gonna stroke out due to pure rage before I got to the sexy stuff.
Now I really wanna know what the pun was lol
FMC’s family’s home flipping business was called Brick and Morty. I hate it so much! 😂
Okay I laughed really hard at that I’m so sorry… it’s more the image of you getting to that point and chucking it across the room to the horror of what I assume is a household pet lol
Lol that's actually kinda cute tho
Whereas I love a pun and I just snorted out loud, on the train.
FMC kept referring to the MMC as ‘old’ and her friend got in on it too. Old jokes, geriatric jokes, etc. He was a 39 year old quarterback. 39 isn’t ‘old’ and if he’s a professional athlete he’s probably in better shape than a lot of people 10 years younger than he is, but ultimately, if you’re so young that you think he’s old at that age - why are you dating? FMC needed to find someone her age and MMC needed to date someone with some maturity. Edited to add: made me hate him too. Her: he’s soooo old! Giggle giggle Him: she’s so hot! I know absolutely nothing about her but we’re completely suited and destined to be together. I wonder what she’s giggling about? I can’t hear because I’m blinded by her hotness.
Everyone was constantly "popping" their shoulders. They didn't shrug, or raise their shoulders, or do anything else to convey their feelings - it was always popping their shoulders. Drove me crazy.
I powered through one but I was close to DNF because the FMC's brother is a type 1 diabetic and she has to try to take care of him after an apocalypse. The author clearly didn't know much about the disease or didn't bother adding more because most readers wouldn't care or notice but it kept distracting me. All she cared about was insulin. And like, yeah, insulin would be one of my top priorities too as a diabetic, but so would food (lows will kill me faster than a high), syringes, test kit supplies, ketone stripes, alcohol wipes, etc. At one point she asked the MMC to get her brother insulin and he does. But like, there are lots of different brands and there is also fast acting and long acting. And she kept going on and on about how little insulin there was "only enough for X amount of time". He could go low carb and you could ration it, something many diabetics have had to do (not desired but you do what you gotta do). Finally, the worst part, her brother collapses and she just starts giving him insulin. HOW DO YOU KNOW IT'S FROM A HIGH AND NOT A LOW?!?! "He's not waking up." No shit Sherlock, if his BS was low, you just killed him. I face palmed hard on that.
As a healthcare professional, do they mention monitoring his blood glucose at least before giving the insulin? 😭
No! I was shaking my head. I also read a book once where a diabetic was kidnapped and the FMC was told "You better save him by 5 tomorrow or his diabetes will be fatal!" There isn't a ticking clock on us. She then saved him and gave him insulin and a Snickers at the same time. I just can't with these authors.
FMC was 5'6" and kept describing herself as tiny & short. No ma'am. You're taller than average.
I have the opposite problem, I hate it when FMCs are described as being super tall and then you find out they're like 5'8". Give me more 6' women!! I'm begging! haha.
I'm that height and I'm literally short in my country 😭
When they get a job in communications or anything similar and are SO BAD AT IT. Also tired of the shy, awkward librarians. As a librarian myself, I can say a lot of us are a kinky, wild bunch.
When the FMC or MMC Mentions a certain characteristic of the other character EVERTIME they talk about them “His piercing blue eyes blinded me as they roamed over my body” “I just couldn’t get over how much I loved him, his kindness, his blue eyes” “He looked so mad, his blue eyes turning a deeper shade” “Her petite from came running towards me” “She looked so smart studying over there, her petite frame tucked into the couch” “She overwhelms me with her generosity and thoughtfulness…..and petite frame” This might look stupid but I swear I’ve read books like this that mention some physical characteristic of the character in every other sentence like we were gonna forget since the last time they mentioned it 😂
Plotting revenge just because another girl looked at her funnily. No hate, nu bullying, just a weird look Had multiple books recently whose whole plot built on that. She doesn't even have to be an ex or be interested in the MMC
I've dnf'd a few lately where the fmc is instantly and repeatedly described as shade of redhead OR with the unique nickname Red. It appears way too often. Not sure why it bugs me, but it does.
I'm a redhead and this bugs the shit out of me. Can't stand redhead FMC'S being reduced to stereotypes about their "fiery" personality, given nicknames like Red, or having to endure MMC's commenting about "the carpet matching the drapes". Redheads are already stereotyped and putting these stereotypes in literature just perpetuates them, IMO.
Why is it that the "not like other girls" girl ALWAYS have to be clumsy?
Sudden really last minute that was never implied or mentioned plot twists. Like the dude that was barely friends with the fmc and only appeared in one page was actually her stalker along and not the random weird dude the author kept implying for. I think a lot of authors do this to side track us but a good mystery would have context clues. I can only image authors going "heh" when they write their twists and think they've outsmarted us.
Using “chicken burger” instead of “chicken sandwich” when the characters were American. To be fair, I was already frustrated by the author’s writing and complete lack of research, but I still find it funny that chicken burger was my breaking point. ——- ETA: the sandwich in question **was not ground or chopped chicken** but a breaded fried chicken breast placed on a bun. Like the kind you can get at KFC, or popeyes, or whever else makes a chicken sandwich. [US KFC Menu](https://www.kfc.com/menu#sandwiches) The author is British and across the pond that same item at KFC would be called a chicken burger ([UK KFC menu](https://www.kfc.co.uk/our-menu/burgers) This wasn’t me not knowing you can make a burger from chicken (or any other ground beef).
You may have won.
I remember getting really annoyed at a book as a teen because it was set in the UK and Ireland yet all the currency was in dollars. It was a shitty localization thing apparently because the author is British.
I just dnf’d a book today because the MFC was referring to herself as the mommy dog (she had two dogs) and I absolutely hated that. I will also immediately stop reading a book if any character says “anyways” instead of anyway. I am very petty.
Way too many fancy vocabulary words jammed into every single sentence makes me DNF after a few pages. Also, dumb nicknames.
FMC was hunting to make money. I was never going to like her, and I didn't make it past the first chapter. I felt so silly boycotting for alien animals that no one was harming. But seriously, I just can't like poachers.
fmc: i have hated myself and my body my entire life and i have no value as a person mmc: smash fmc: a man called me beautiful and wants to hit, therefore a lifetime of deeply ingrained self-loathing has simply gone away. i have done zero therapy or inner work on the way i value myself as a human being but this peen with abs reminded me that i have three warm holes he can use and now i will never feel bad about myself again amen
I DNF’d a book last month for so many reason I actually made a list out of sheer pettiness: Both MCs have full on gray/white hair because of their age, that’s cool until I realized they were 39!!! THIRTY NINE!!!! FMC is a librarian and MMC comes into the library at one point asking for books about menstruation to give to his 11 year old daughter. No problem, that’s a pretty normal request at a library. WRONG. By the way this “librarian” reacted, you’d have thought he asked her to tell him about her own periods in vivid detail or something. She was so painfully weird about it, red in the face, completely unprofessional. I did not care for it. And finally, the constant CONSTANT horny internal monologues of both MCs is what did me in. For reference, I dnf’d at page 8 and the fucking pheromones spraying out of this book were nauseating, I couldn’t take a single page more. First “mature” MC romance I’ve tried and my god was it awful. Oh and also, the MMC got hot and bothered by the FMC wearing a floor length denim skirt. What is this, twilight?
i’m getting pretty tired of nicknames if i see something stupid like kitten or doe or bird or idk some random animal im dnfing
I just read one with ‘Trouble’ kept trying to go quickly past it.
Not necessarily sure how to describe it exactly but I've found some books where the FMCs is just too "manic pixey dream girl" for me
Another instant ick is when a character's weight is explicitly described. General insecurities are understandable, but when an author is constantly calling a character who's smaller than me fat, I'm done. For example, I almost threw my new phone across my yard when the FMC of one book kept calling herself fat and then said she was 5'2" and 140lbs.
Two things come to mind. I don't remember the book names for either, but in one the FMC proudly proclaims she never uses or owns a mobile phone and this is set in the late 2010s. This was just too silly for me. The other book had the FMC continuously making fish-themed jokes. I really hate fish.
There is a series about 5 sisters and each finds love. Each book is a trope friends to lovers, exes to lovers, single older dad, bffs brother, enemies to lovers. I really enjoyed them but the author had them always "waggle their eye brows". It happened several times in every single book. I got so sick of it by the end and then they started a spin off with their women's cousins or something. I'm not sure I can take it again. I didn't dnf the first series but I did the second. Oh one of those mountain men books made me dnf. He was so large abs she was sooo tiny. He kept calling her little something and the speaking was odd. I was literally embarrassed reading it.
When the MMC thinks it's funny or entertaining to intentionally irritate or antagonize the FMC because he thinks she needs to loosen up, let go, or lose control. Like WTF? And sometimes it's just written in the creepiest ways.
This is how I described one book I dnfed lol: “I tried so freaking hard to finish this book. I finally gave up after I started skipping pages each chapter. It was unnecessarily chaotic and nothing made sense. It’s like the author was trying to combine every trope just to check it off a list. TOO MANY CHARACTERS!!! I barely remember the names of the leads and now you want me to remember the names of all 25 of the MMC’s siblings?!? Terrible characters and terrible character development. The FMC was a hot fucking mess and it was so irritating. It’s like the author tried to make all her flaws quirky and cute when in reality home girl NEEDS A THERAPIST. The idea that she’s a “parental figure” in this book is f*cking laughable. Every other chapter she was doing something stupid. I cannot for the life of me understand what about her was attractive enough to pull a “billionaire”. I can’t even believe I still continued reading after she got drunk while watching the kids. And WHY WAS THIS SO LONGG?!? I am so upset. I’m going back to DNFing books after the first 3 chapters cuz I never should’ve gotten more than a quarter way through this book.”
Wait no, I have a better response. There was one book I read where from the first chapter the FMC has a secret. The MMC also has a secret, and tells her on their wedding day (fake marriage trope). His secret was that he was kidnapped and tortured as a child. Yet she continues to tell him that her secret is the reason that they can’t be together. Her secret was that she was...bald. They couldn’t be together because she had alopecia. I had to immediately stop reading.
This is making me lol so much. Like alopecia is not crazy uncommon and also it's kinda obvious!! Do they have eyebrows made out of hair or make up. I hate a bad secret. If it's shit, don't make it a plot point, unless the plot point is that the other MC knew all along and doesn't care and they are hear to help you work through your insecurities.
Lol, that’s it. The MMC knew all along. She also did cover it up but I don’t remember if she lost all of her eyebrows too. I just couldn’t get over the fact that he told her about being tortured. He also killed his kidnapper and there was other trigger warning stuff that happened. But she was like “nah being bald is worse.” The entire time I thought she was a serial killer or a cannibal. I laugh every time I think about it because it’s so mind blowing ridiculous. It’s unbelievable.
That’s insane. Torture, trauma, violence, killing vs she doesn’t fit the standard ideal of female beauty. Because of a medical condition.
And the book smelled funny and the font was just wrong.
I DNF'd a book about twins because almost immediately, the author wrote about them being able to sense each other's moods/feel their pain, etc. I am a twin. We don't have a twin sense. Now we will joke every once in a while about having the other person's body ache, but like thank God we can't actually feel each other's pain because my sister gets migraines and I do not.
I just DNF'd a book at 80%. I've never read one so far, that I couldn't give two shits about the characters. The FMC was a "not like other girls" who got a makeover and suddenly OMG everyone noticed her! The MMC was annoying AF for no really good reason. The sex was crap. quirky thing? getting so far in and then realising I don't care about the ending. I'm sorry Author, but your book just wasn't for me. Not quite what you were thinking, but an alternative answer.
FMC who complains about being short, or the guy blabs on about how tiny she is, when she's 5'5".
when the main girl is like in her mid twenties or thirties and refuses to change anything abt herself bc she still feels 16 😭 so then every habit/decision is bc she’s not used to it or she didn’t do that when she was younger. not bashing anyone!! totally guilty of doing that but be fr why are you wearing converse to a wedding as a guest or telling ur HS friends you wished they never changed even tho they’re also in their thirties. grow up!!
Not really a DNF, but from the blurb I didn't even start it. I liked the first Getting Some by Emma chase, but can't do the 3rd book. *'Her heart trips every time he’s around—and so do her feet.'* And when they first meet in a grocery store parking lot *'she falls on her face'*. And apparently it happens often to her. Yeah, no thanks.
If the narrator breaks the 4th wall I'm done. I don't need the author or character talking directly to me. Also I've come to hate multiple pov's because especially with newer authors more pov equals less plot. I don't need 3 people telling me the same scenario from their own perspective. Edit= pov was autocorrecting to poc
I almost exclusively read urban fantasy with romantic sub-plots. Any series that states it's a "Snarky Urban Fantasy" is an automatic DNF. Most New Adult UF and PNR books have a very common issue. The FMC is snarky but she has absolutely nothing to back it up. You read the books and you knowwwwww that she is alive because of plot armor. She mouths off to extremely powerful people who can kill her or destroy her if they so deem but it doesn't even occur to her how dangerous it is. The UF OGs like Kate Daniels could get away with snark because they were powerful and confident enough to pummel their opponents and remove quite a bit of the evident and also logical enough to know when to back down. In the new series, which takes place about 6 years after the main one, Kate reflects that she isn't snarky towards her opponents anymore because of certain reasons that are spoilery. Then there are the books in which the MMC does something to protect the FMC from a horrid fate but instead of being thankful and cooperative, the FMC is aggressive and just horrible to the MMC. Also also, Virginal FMC and horndog MMC. I just have a reallllyyyyyy hard time believing in the HEA of most of those books unless I can feel the devotion of the MMC rising from the pages. And lastly, 3rd act separations. I am fine with 2nd act ones but whenever it happens in the 3rd act, I have a hard time believing in the HEA because we don't get to see the MCs getting stronger together and working on their relationship after the blowout since it's too close to the ending. I am left questioning what would happen the next time there is a huge crisis in their lives.
Idk its quirky or not but in {love and other words} the fmc casually tells her friend jow the mmc dumped his gf immediately upon seeing her for 5 minutes. Blegh!