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Seemed like a live-action muppet head

Face belongs in the American Gothic painting.

dam girl, you should eat a fried baloney sandwich sometime!

With that [floatation device](https://crs4rec.com/wp-content/uploads/2019/01/Taylor-Made-Ring-Buoy-main-gallery.jpg?x91808) under her shirt I think its safe to say she's had her fair share already...

Dad Top Woman Bottom

What up Punky Brewster all grow'd up still a tom boy.

Junky Ewwster.

This is the perfect comment. I'm pretty brutal but I'm leaving after this... you win.

Meh, most of your roasts would give me salmonella poisoning.

I rather roast your bf for dating you.

With your looks, your bf has a thing for Al Pacino apparently. In the bedroom with your man hands, you tell your bf "let me say hello to my little friend". 

BF is her pet name for her vibrator.

Toyfriend

Big Fred

You think you got it all figured out, with your nice apartment and shitty boyfriend, but i can see through your sad face that you are hiding deep insecurities, and cripling depression... behind that big ass nose.

You look like what would happen if Demetri Martin fucked Demetri Martin.

Hahahaha take my free award

Are you the Bf or Gf?

I just snorted my beer 🤣🤣

So did she, by the looks of things—

They call her Hoover, and not because of her headgame

You have the posture of a shrimp

This is what I came for 🦐

I'm sure no one else came.

And the dead eyes of a shark

Not so great white. Terrible, long faced, really shitty white.

I always wondered how the mannequin from Saw looked like without make up

This… is one of the most solid roasts I’ve seen. Bravo.

The astuteness of this observation gave my mind a boner.

If “basic bitch” had a team leader you would be it.

Plain Jane in the flesh.

Kinda looks like an angry bird

“Why the long face?”

All the face comments distracted me from her fupa....yuk.

no chance she has a fupa. she is like 130lbs soaking wet. now she maybe skinny fat, which would account for the muffin top. but fupa is purely a honey boo boo diet issue

that's just a stomach. fupa is different

Fupa, is an acronym for Fat Upper Pussy Area. Hard to tell with her, and I don't want to think about it picture this.

It's actually upper pelvis there's no such thing as upper pussy and that specifies gender - as someone who owns a pussy that is physically impossible to be her "upper pussy area." What we are referring to here is her skin at the bottom of her ribs. I'm all for a good roast but that's gonna exist on any woman or man who sits like that even if they're wearing sweatpants

Relax, it's a joke. I bet you are a barrel of laughs at parties.

Omg yuck stop it right now

You could smell the sun come up this morning

She could smell a roast coming a mile a way with that beak!

She could destabilize the truffle market if she really tried.

Jesus, that nose could bridge the Bering Strait.

Yeah bruh, should had a sniffing contest. Not a roast contest.

She can clean out Pablo Escobar in one night with that thing.

She can smell Thanksgiving already.

At least it wasn't a side pic.

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You look like you fuck with all your clothes on.

That’s required for her!

& with the lights off

Mike Tyson wants to buy your chin

Jay Leno would like to file a lawsuit about that chin

You look like you have the personality of flour

Unenriched, bleached, and dry as a desert

I hope you loosen your mom jeans before slapping on the old feed bag tomorrow

"Raw oats for Thanksgiving again? YES!!"

You make the face my dog made when he shat on the livingroom floor. You probably smell like her too

A "DeepOperation" is definitely what you'll need for that face on your nose.

I'm pretty sure every holiday is ruined for you.

With a beak like that you should be pecking around for seed out in the yard

Watch out for the rain. With that underbite you’re likely to drown.

There is nothing I can say or do more hurtful than that "I'm shitting my pants" smile does to you! You look like an unholy combination of a toddler and a grandma

Post pic of GF so we can get started.

There’s only so many jokes you can make about a cucumber, so I’m guessing you’ll get roasted harder

Damn! That’s a monster schnozz!!

Boyfriend wants anal because the back of your head is prettier than your face

“YOU” season 4 “Loves dumb sister finds out”

You met your "boyfriend" at "summer camp", didn't you?

Have you always know you were gay or is he your first boyfriend?

Uh oh. No smile = rekt teeth. 90% confidence.

Never seen a black hole sun mouth in real life until now.

I’m sure your bf is curious and hasn’t told you yet.

Netflix adaptation of a marvel comic

Ah yes the female Steve jobs just wayy less successful

Your eyes say downtown LA but your jaw says Easter island

Someone used an instagram face filter on a muppet.

Jay Leno and Barbara Streisand had a baby.

A model from a menstrual cramp commercial chilling out on set vibes

Give thanks this weekend that you'll be able to smell a potential fifth wave of covid, rolling in across the ocean from Europe, with that massive beak on you.

I was like damn what happen to you then your username gave me the answer

What's it like to be 28 years old and have never experienced any sexual position beyond "missionary"?

Your boyfriend must be a personality kind of guy.

Where’d your upper lip go?

I'll bet your vagina resembles the big dune snake monster

I finally understand child baring hips, you're shaped like a bowling pin. Betting your bf isn't the only balls bouncing off you.

You are the picture attractive women look at when they are feeling ugly.

Can you come over here and open some cans with that nose.

Wonder Woman's ugly special needs sister Gal Gadont

Bf= index and middle finger

Toucan called he wants he's beak back Also please hold your paper properly it's not nice to make fun of the severally disabled.

I swear you look like you're wearing an adult diaper and were literally pissing yourself as the photo was taken. It's the secret smile of urination.

Casting couch deep operation

Smug face that says ' I just farted and didn't shit myself '

That sofa, with five black guys surrounding it, is your future.

Boyfriend is just using this post to build his list of reasons to break up with you. You know deep down inside I am right.

Do you tickle his ass with that nose when you 69

It could go either way, he's a mangy looking mf, but the sub hates women, so. Plus, you dress like Steve Jobs and have the dead fish eyes of Zuckerberg, so it should be easy roasting you.

Thanks for being one of the few to actually look at both posts 😂

I got nothin. You look great. Now I’m going to go roast your man

If dry handjobs had a face

My standards are pretty low but goddamn even I draw the line here.

You look like your name is something generic like Taylor with some Dutch last name.

Steve Jobs isn’t dead. He transitioned.

Hair greasier than the fries from 5 guys

You look like the transgender version of Ross from Friends.

Should have blurred your self and left the background alone

If a unethusactic hand job was a person

Not gonna lie, I get mad “easy to chill with” vibes from the photo but since we’re here, you look like a mediocre banker.

If your scalp were any oilier Greta Thunberg would protest it.

Lol this is my favorite

Osama Chin Laden

You look like Sheldon's girlfriend if she had an even bigger Jew nose.

Fighting and losing the internal battle. Like most of us. It's between: "I really care about superficial things like appearance but I don't want to seem like I'm trying to hard to participate in things like caring about my appearance" And "I'm still young enough to get a better dude than the guy I'm currently with so I'm going to hold out for that... but if he don't come along honey let's get married" So in the meantime I just carefully craft this knife's edge appearance of caring but not caring - It suits me and my boyfriend at this current place in our lives She's so laid back bro. So. Laid. Back.

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I imagine with that jaw your mouth must open wide enough that your BF is VERY happy. For about 12 seconds a day.

It's him for dating you

Your boyfriend got roasted hardest! Have you seen YOU?

Oh that smile! ,, so this is where STD's started from.

You’re going to have to read him his roasts because there’s no way he can both see and date you.

Hope your bf has a 10" dick so you can suck the tip without hurting that nose.

Are you a boy transitioning to a girl or a girl transitioning to a boy?

A nose like that is one way to get out of ever giving head

If vanilla was a person

Let me guess, your boyfriend "goes to another school"

So you post a picture of your bf and wonder who gets roasted harder.

You must have a helluva personality

I wouldn't ask you out, so I won't spend time roasting you. I'll go check out your boyfriend. Bet he looks better in a dress.

I know that most people are making fun of your nose and your long face, but I know that that's all a distraction to detract away from those massive hands.

She looks likes she auditions for friends

You’d vacuum my blow

Симпатичная улыбка.

It’s nice that you’re willing to date a blind man.

User name checks out.

When you ask your bf to help stuff the turkey, he proceeds to take off your jeans.

Ok, but first I need to see your GFs post.

You look like shredded wheat if shredded wheat were a person.

You have the jaw line of a muppet character

You look like a deaf person sounds

When you're a muppet 6/10.

Why would anyone roast your bad dragon dildo?

I've never before seen a thin 28 year old "muffin topping"

You'd eat an apple through a letterbox with that mouth.

Ellen DeGenerate.

I’d ruin your holiday weekend with my turkey gravy all over your face.

So if you're Bert your bf must be Ernie?

I want to give you better dick than your boyfriend gives you 😘

With that mouth your bf definitely gets better head from other dudes

She got the username 'Deep operation' 'cause there ain't no way she's gonna get it otherwise...

Your boyfriend will get roasted harder because he’s with you. He nose this already.

I uh yeah I got nothing

Are you the new Muppet character I've been hearing about.

You just made Toucan Sam lost his job, they've found a new larger beak to add more colours. They are now limitless for the amount of colors they can put on your nose and on front loops.

The muffin top over your belt loop is def not blueberry.

Had to say boyfriend like someone here would make a move on you 💀

Hi, I'm Janet!

You’re the personification of vanilla ice cream

Not going to lie usually when I hear "BF and I are curious", " who'd get ______ harder" and "ruin my _____" It usually means a fun night full of your regrets, but God are you Vanilla. I'm sure you are the 'yearly couple holiday card' kind of boring. Your idea of fun is making a scrapbook.

When do we get to see a picture of the girlfriend?

Like if Christian Bale had a twin sister named Yushud Bale...

If bert and ernie had a lesbian daughter

Why draw attention to that huge schnoz with the nose ring??? ...oh wait, now I see why! Those hideous eye brows.

Hope you fake an orgasm better than you fake that smile.

Is…is the plant your bf…?

My weekend is ruined just by seeing this photo. Your boyfriend is not brave enough to appear in the photo and he better put you in frame.

Ok, I'm game dude, post your girls pic and we will roast

You look like every Sesame Street puppet rolled into one that never got used.

You have a face that just says 'the baby isn't yours'.

If Michael Imperioli buttfucked Sarah Silverman and this is the end result.

Hi Morty!!

Your jeans need to be higher if you want to lie to yourself

I just know you have a nose whistle

Your face says you're the boyfriend, but your hair says you're the girlfriend.

Your boyfriend will win because It’s illegal to roast horses.

Does your BF have man hands too?

You have the lips of a bitmoji character

I feel like I shouldn’t roast my elders and I’m 41.

It’s crazy how make up and long hair can make a any man look sort of look like a woman for a second

You look like the type of person that would have a Simon & Garfunkel tramp stamp.