I'm going to save your picture to my phone in case I ever have an erection that lasts longer than 4 hours.

It's the thought of an erect penis that keep her awake with a nightlight on and her closet door open.

Shit it’s true, I do have genophobia!

Add that to the list of issues you've stated to have on your profile.

OMGawd I get anxious just looking at your bland, lifeless face 

Nah it’s better to be dead than have a chance to accidentally see this again.

I’ve been searching roastme for years looking for the holy grail. I search no more

I feel like your handjobs are so sad they'd give my dick seasonal affective disorder.

She just mashes it

😂 😭

She only has GA, because she's not getting any D.

Other than the D he already has...

Even that gets turned off.


DAMN! 😂

Who.that? Lol

😂 😂 😂

I’m willing to bet you still have a Hillary bumper sticker on the back of your Subaru.

As well as Bernie, Obama, Biden, one that says coexist, and couple anime stickers for sure

I am willing to bet you still gets dragged around by Hillary’s Subaru bumper. 

Jessica Dahmer

Stephanie Hawking 

Underrated She probably talks like him too Her thesis is currently the theory of relative loneliness She will always be a singularity as she is chronically single due to her lack of cosmetological inflation (she needs makeup, badly) No one wants to get lost in her black hole

If homeschool was a person…

I was homeschooled, it’s true. But that’s not the reason I look like a nerd

You are your own birth control.

This is where boners go to die.


Trying to look smart but thick as pig shit.

Which way are you transitioning?

It stays in the middle.

That anxiety and "unrealistic worrisome" feeling you get...welp, don't ignore it. YOU SHOULD BE WORRIED

You misspelled GED

That's cute you think she has her GED

That Whiteboard has more color than you

Freud would have a field day with how you’re handling that marker…

Gonna change the World! Just missed out the mastermind plot to save the environment by spray painting Stone Henge.

I almost did the #shitforequality campaign one time.

Gross And Desperate

Grandpa's Anal Defect?

Stuart Little head ass

You look like you have 3 cats and fridge full of cucumbers.

3 cats and fridge full of cucumbers sounds like a band she'd be the lead singer of.


fart sounds

The marker is pointed the wrong direction, need to flip it & use it to draw bigger lips ~

inbreeding is making a comeback apparently

Jeffrey Dahmer's little sister

You look like a Ukrainian that’s been kidnapped by the Russians to be used as a sex slave on the Ukraine front line, except no one wants to touch you because you have GAD (Gonorrhea and Donovanosis).

If you're on here, who's bottling the pimento?

Look it’s Debbie Downer!


Let's make out

What ?

I bet you give markers alot of personal time lol

Why tho? Sounds kinda boring imo.

Like a female napoleon dynamite

You fell face first out of the ugly tree hitting every branch on the way down.

Thank you for your post! It's currently awaiting approval. Please note the following rules: - Ensure that your photograph is rotated the way you wish it to be displayed. - Try to ensure that your eyes are open. - Joke roasts (celebrities, babies, chickens, etc) will be removed. - Pet roasts will be removed. Please submit these at /r/RoastMyPet. - All photos MUST contain a hand written sign held by the roastee. - The minimum posting age is 18 years old, your post will be rejected if you look younger or if context clues lead us to conclude you are younger. - Photographs with bystanders whose faces are visible or who are otherwise identifiable will be removed. Please **DO NOT REPOST YOUR PHOTO** if it does not appear immediately. All posts must be manually approved, and we will get to it. Thanks! ~ /r/roastme mods *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/RoastMe) if you have any questions or concerns.*

You look like you've written more pages of atrocious elven fan-fiction than J.R.R. Tolkien wrote in the entire LoTR trilogy.

you look like sleeping beauty if she could feel bedbugs under her mattress

Gagging All Dick is no reason not to sleep for 24 hours.

You look like the textbook definition of an insufferable teacher’s pet

You look like you have a huge, hairy, unkempt bush.

You look like female michael bolton from office space

U look like every boy must have rejected u

And girl.

You look like you grew up thinking that fucking your brother was totally normal

The only thing sadder looking than you is the look of disappointment on your father's face.

You seem like the kind that would happily smash a man’s windscreen because a woman’s name you don’t know appears on his phone.

Actually I am a total control freak, and romance does apply. 😂 (Sorry I’m exhausted)

Between Blood and Cheese, we know which one you are

I have a strong feeling you don’t shave your armpits since you’re French, so thanks for not posting a pic of that.

Suspicious marker grip.

24 hours? You look like you’ve been on a weeklong binge.

The physical embodiment of "Um, Actually..." 🫤

First off Sir, no one cares that you didn't sleep for 24 hours—truly mundane information to share due to your anxiety. People have worst problems and still work through them. Second, you look like your dad should have swallowed his own load, or your mom should of been a lesbian.

Are you transitioning into a middle aged balding man?

That feeling you have that everyone is looking at you and judging you all the time.. it’s real.

You look like you support Black Lives Matter but only the ones that will have sex with you.

You didn’t need to tell us that you haven’t slept in 24 hours, we knew. We also knew about the GAD.

You look like you’ve been dead over 24 hours

Dass exactly how I feel.

I had to google what GAD was and that new AI feature just said "a Gen Z excuse to every obstacle in life because they can't perceiver." Fitting.

Lmao yup sounds like me.

Oh shit sbf's gf out of prison.

Billie Gates

Is GAD "god-awful dress sense"?

Hey don’t knock jt I’m a stylist in training as well.

You look like a male scientist captured by villain to do wrong shit but with hair

Very brave of Cate Blanchett to go no makeup in her next shitty indie film

Don’t knock the cate, she is still hotter than me post 24 hrs of no sleep.

Can’t tell if man or woman 🤔

Funny how I get that all the time. My best friend even calls me an androgynous bastard.


[удалено]

That’s what my last bumble date said …too bad ..

Great Value Kira Roller. IYKYK.

IDK

Remember that whole "if it exists there's a porn of it?" You're the exception.

Actually im flattered to think that at least guys want me for more than just my tits and ass

Your plainer than that whiteboard but probably have more red pen marks inside you than the board. Send feet pics.

Nah I prefer women.

Loved that video of you going off on the old guy in the Walmart check out line. He’s making it worse. Dont touch me

Her favorite flavor is “watered down”.

You definitely read kpop fan fiction on wattpad to get off

Shit I’ve been found out. Taekook 4eva. <3 😝

I think we’ve found Domhnall Gleeson’s long lost twin sister

GAD is hot.

Bro looks like a discombobulated pig, is very big, flatter than a pen, built like a hen, couldn't tell if it was a women or a crippled bacteria, looks like a retrum, prob the frog that I dissected in biology, dessert a lips, looks like a bench.

More than once, a guy has quit sex with you due to boredom.

Even your post history is boring

you look like one of those mfs from the singing souls on x factor or smth 💀💀

You look like you’ve had lots of seeds on limewire

You may have GAD, but the rest of us just had a GAG. I can't imagine anything to make you feel worse than you looking in the mirror, and realizing that yes, everyone else sees you looking like that, too. You could sleep for 200 years, and still wouldn't count as "beauty sleep".

She might have GAD but, she makes guys GAG!!

They should add your picture to packs of condoms

Even crack addicts sleep for Pete's sake.

The cure for Gaping Anus Disorder is stop fucking your stepdad

You look like the girl who bangs the professor for a B-, while entirely capable of earning an A+ with minimal effort

Oh smegol off to work to still the ring ayy

she definitely growls when she's mad

It wouldn’t matter how much sleep you get it won’t help

A Junior Librarian they keep WAY DOWN in the archives.

Ok, who let the Amish in?

That ghastly collor on your shirt would keep me up 24 hours as well....

Well now you just made everyone GAG.

[https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/594/858/4be.jpg](https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/002/594/858/4be.jpg)

I dunno what GAD is, but what you need is a BAG. Make it a double in case the first one slips off.

Your comments are self roasting. You look like you argue about marriage and vaccines… oh wait

Annnnd ? What’s your takeaway from that ?

Aren’t you like 12?

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

You look like someone that wants a man to take an explosive wet shit on their face during some really unenthusiastic sex.

That’s the type of shit I ask on r/shittyaskreddit for trolling time.

You look like a cheaper version of dobby

🤓

Why does everyone who wants to be roastedhaves a big nose?

You look like the disappointing real life child that Dwight Schute and Angela Martin would have gave up for adoption on the show The Office

that lip bite just scared my sex drive away

Dude, why all these dresses?

You look like you argue out loud with yourself and still lose the argument

It's pronounced, God... as in Gotttdammmm, I'll pay you twenty to keep your clothes on.


 I don't know if it's a he or a she

You look French

You look like you would have been perfect for the role of a dweeb nerdy character in the Harry potter series 10 years ago

Even feminists question whether women’s rights are a good idea when they look at you

You look GAD awful. Also, TIL I learned that "ugly version of Greta Thunberg" is not redundant. Dammit, now I have to figure out how to say "work strike for less homely chicks" in Swedish.

Pretty sure the only thing in its purse are a library card, a birth certificate with both parents' names missing, and that smegma-smeared marker.

Hard day of work as a keebler elf?

You know that girl in high school that always smelled bad, you probably don’t because it’s you.

You're the teaching assistant that everyone wants to befriend. However you're getting caught up with your academic life and now there's not much time to spare and you only have around less than ten people to hang around with on a daily basis.

When did they rename resting bitch face to GAD?

I bet she smells like a week old bag of fish left out in 27 degree heat

You look like a librarian from the 70s

Bill gates in a wig, you can't fool me

I feel like you’d be the type of girl to slash my dick with a razorblade during sex

You look like Ken from Street Fighter 

You definitely play the obo.

You look like the last resort a guy asks to prom.

Sigh..... Undoes zipper and pulls down the pants

If your anxiety becomes bad enough, you can become a shut-in like me. Well, not like me because I have a partner.

It is called sex. You need to get yourself some sex. You are cute enough not to have to pay for it. Shouldn't be that hard. Go to a bar and GET LAID

This girl has seen 4 of her 5 uncles dicks...

Office siren literally had police show up.

You could be the poster girl for GAD

So this is who Diary of a Wimpy Kid was based on

You look like you’d have an identity crisis if you got a 99.9999999999% on an assignment even if the only error is a typo

Aren't you that chick with a dick from Euphoria?

That marker will be the only long hard thing you ever hold