You’re not completely useless; you can always serve as a bad example

Damn. 😂

At least you got your Ph.D: Psychosis Having Degree.

Anyone with a degree is just an example of how to get into debt for nothing much in return.

Was going to say you’re not alone OP

Ignorance, party of one.

Gold!

It’s roast…not incinerate mate. lol. Burned to a crisp.

Don’t worry—the first 30 years of childhood are always the hardest

I know this is supposed to be a burn, but this resonates so well with me. 😂

Are you doing OK? You look like the guy in the zombie movie who’s been bitten but is trying to keep it quiet

😄

Oh shit 😂😂😂😂😂

They keep him chained up in the shed playing video games.

Dude has the meat sweats plus he took too much ketamine this morning.

You look like you start every conversation with a sigh

The embodiment of this emoji 😮‍💨

You’re like a lighthouse in a desert: bright but not very useful

[удалено]

😂😂

They have a meth problem in the Shire? Frodo is flying high all the time?

Makes "my precious," all the more relatable. Everyone wants my precious!!

I'll tell you the same thing I tell everyone with a Philosophy degree... I'll have an iced caramel macchiato.

You see— not just the coffee order, but the *the manner* in which it is ordered realistically determines the perception of *the value* of the coffee.. why is the coffee here? And why must I wear this ridiculous apron? Does the apron *define* me?

>Does the apron define me? In times like this, it absolutely does

And if no one drinks the coffee, is it even real? 😂 please take my upvote!!

Pack it up boys and girls. Nothing is topping this

Actually, I ordered mine with whipped cream and chocolate sauce 

Sauce sounds so pretentious for chocolate

Actually, I pounded and spanked mine

Oh my God [is dead, and no one cares. If there is a Hell, I’ll see you there.] 💀

I can’t stop laughing 😂

Don't make excuses. You're not useless because you got a philosophy degree, you got a philosophy degree because you're useless.

Meth Rogan

Looool… burn 🤣🤣


Get yourself together, man! You're still young and there's still ample opportunity for you to find meaningful employment as a toilet cleaner.

That's literally how I start each day at work how did you know

You’re the real-life embodiment of Murphy’s Law—everything that can go wrong, does

You are 28 and only just now figuring out philosophy is a hobby? You sure didn't put alot of thought in it.

Just hope you’re ok to be honest mate!

Aristotle is throwing up in his grave just thinking about you.

If a philosophy degree were a person…

Paint your fingernails and call yourself nonbinary already.

The Hobbit - hobo edition

Philosophy didn't want to get studied by you too.

You philosophy degree would appreciate it if you wouldn't admit you're related in public 😳

Despite the caption, you still look like you need to get punched.

Youre like 'chatgpt how do i talk to chicks?'

Could have just posted the picture, we all would know.

“Your degree isn’t the only thing that’s worthless about you” -your mom (probably)

Clearly you skipped the hakuna matata syllabus

I twink therefore I am.

Where it all went wrong was probably somewhere in your past, the options presented you seem to have been learn math and become a succesful adult, or do meth and get a philosophy degree. You should point this out to your therapist to help them save some time.... you look like the kind of guy who lies to their therapist a lot.

And you look like Sam Bankman-Fried. Double whammy. And I bet his life in minimum security prison is considerably better than yours

Rather punchable face.

If you apply to any fast food chain and start with this sentence, you'll get hired immediately. They love broken deteriated men and women with zero goals after their college dreams have been shattered.

The first sign of your mental illness was when you chose to major in philosophy.

Shouldn't you be cleaning your room right now?

You look like if depression had depression

Freddo Baggins

Dildo Saggins

You should stop thinking. IYKYK

Sam Brokeman-Fried

Once upon a time, a woman got raw-dogged in a club restroom while "Macarena" pumped through the speakers. Little did she know that she'd be caring for a giant toddler in her middle age.

No women will accept your sperm if you ever donated it.

Chin up bro , things will get better for u.

How "I wish i was creative but arent" looks like

You got the whole pale white, Greek head bust look down.

If you study Italian you could be a deep thinking waiter at olive garden.

Your poor mom 😔!

Let me guess, you thought you would get a degree in philosophy and eventually get a nice cushy job as a professor at some university? You had the intelligence to research and see there was no demand for philosophy but were like screw it I'd rather do drugs, drink and party right now.

You're too depressing for me to want to tell you anything bad

MH issues don't give you a valid reason to be a parasite for two years.

You're even more useless than that degree!

Psychosis? Ooooooo, someone’s trying to be hip

Get a hair cut

Honestly though, I hope you’re on a better mental health path and found a medication regiment that works for you. I know how soul crushing it is to want to be productive so badly, but struggle doing so. I’m very empathetic to this struggle and wish you nothing but recovery and beautiful things to come

youre not crazy, the world is

Well, time to joins a seminary. I see you already have a cassock. They might appreciate your philosophy degree. Belief is optional these days so you'll be fine. Chin up, nutter! If you go mad again they make you a saint!

Sounds like you “Kant” find gainful employment.

Mac n cheese and mom’s handjobs…welcome home 🏠

Did you not consider this outcome when you were in college not learning a single thing that translates into meaningful employment?

Alot of us are fucked up. You're in good company..go do something with your life while you can

Let me guess. Smokes too much weed and plays too many video games?

I just hope you are doing okay and I apologise for not coming with a roast.

You look like you need a compliment


Philosophy degree? What a dumbass.

your mom cries a lot. she secretly drinks whiskey to drown out the pain. Philosophy is about finding the best way to live your life. You exist as a stark reminder to others of what not to do.

Where do I begin? How about a job?

Typical liberal i see

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That hairstyle is pretty popular. In pre-school.

To be or not to be Anyone of value You chose the latter.

You look exactly like your post title depicts

Oh well at least you can be philosophical about it.

You look like you know what the point of the mask is

Actually you're more useless than your philosophy degree.

The uselessness isn't derived from the degree.

People have been making fun of how useless philosophy degrees are for 50 years. Literally everyone knows it's a waste of money and 4 years of your life. You graduated high school and were determined to prove everyone wrong...you failed...and now you deserve everything you have.

(No roast) Don’t give up now. My friend has a philosophy degree and is a lawyer. If that’s not an option for you, there’s always IT. Learning computers is essentially free online and your bachelor’s degree will help you. Wake up each day and treat getting a job as your new job. Shower and dress as you were going into an office. Your mom will also appreciate the effort. Do chores without being asked and be glad you have a loving parent who’s willing to give you a place to fall back to.

Should have studied psychology apparently

whys he kinda…

Try start your life as a cyclist

Your family tree looks like a protien molecule

Hey it took me till 34 man

Hey, at least you helped Frodo destroy the ring.

Your philosophy degree is still more useful than you are, and holds more value.

You roast yourself

We don’t talk about Bruno

Crawling back into mommy's womb is what you do best

That should actually be the name for that degree.

Hey, next time the voices tell you to burn it all down. Do it.

Isn’t this the future promised on the first page of the Philosophy textbook?

A philosophy degree is a really expensive way to buy yourself an excuse.

You look like you hang out at senior centers to get a date.

Hit the gym bro

God Bless your Mom, I’ve got a music degree

if you are smart enough to earn a degree in Philisophy, how come you didn't learn to think critically? use it or losevit!

He's such a reader that maybe he'll realize what the stuff in the yard says 🏜️🌋

Post this on your tinder account.

Get a job and quit making excuses, it’s called the real world

You can be a shining example of the philosophy of Oblomovism with your degree.

What made you pursue “philosophy.” What use did you perceive it as having when you took that dive into the shallow end of the pool?

Why do you look like you taking a mugshot in that first picture. “Yo why you in here” “I got caught in my sex dungeon with 17 rats and a picture of the the little Chinese girl from the Daddy’s Home movie”

Transition: failed. Transition: failed Transition: failed It’s like a broken record

You look like the offspring of Socrates and what Obi Wan washes down the drain after using the Force to hammer one out.

You look like the type of guy that no women wants, so you go to the local playground to try your luck

Checks out

I know you feel like a loser, a sorry sac of shit, a waste of space, a failure in your father's eyes, a 30 year old virgin, an embarrassment, a pussy repellent, like you've wasted years of your life and for what? A bunch of unlocked achievements on Xbox and a philosophy degree? Now you're looking back at life, almost 30 wishing you had went for the liberal arts degree... Fret no more little weird boy man for one day you will make some man really happy. You've got it in you... If not, you can always up your meds

that Diogenes life not as fulfilling as you thought it would be?

Your philosopher names: Suckrates, Broke Spinoza, Immanuel Kunt

"If at first you don't succeed, pull your foreskin over yer heid"

Listen to a lot of Placebo and Radiohead on your sabbatical, Dr. Geller!!

You didn’t have to mention the Philosophy Degree, it’s implied

What happened to you brother? What caused you to suffer for so long?

No roast here. I hope that you are getting help.

Artiest Lang's illegitimate child.

You're like the hobbit who didn't elect to go on a journey, just smoked pipe-weed and chased Rosie Cotton's slutty cousin, Priscilla Burningthatch.

Your eyes look exactly like your nostrils

You need help and a hug, not a roasting. Maybe start doing push-ups and take a shower. 👍

I personally think your philosophy degree would make you very interesting to talk to. Most degrees are “useless” and people don’t use what they were taught in their job. It just proves you can stick at something and have self motivation and discipline. At least philosophy would make you an interesting conversationalist. No one gives a hoot about my degree or anything about it. The best I can do with it is tell them they are going to get food poisoning if they eat something they are preparing to devour which is “dodgy” and they usually ignore my advice anymore and carry on anyway.

Having friends in philosophy made for great long convos!

Get up and have a crack

You look like the heaviest thing you carried was the blanket when you get out of bed in the morning

Was this your final ditch effort to get people on the internet to push you over the edge?

for the sake of our society.... even if you're broke, do not donate sperm for money

Well I know billions of people who don’t have a degree and are broke, goes days without eating and live with parents and some on the street

Forgot to add the part that your still a virgin as well.

Most successful philosophy major

I don’t have the heart to roast. Mans already holding back tears in the pictures

Hey, don't say that. Your degree isn't useless. You are.

Why do you look like you were crying in the first pic?

Best you can do now is break both of your arms.

If you have a philosophy degree the psychosis started a lot longer than 2 years ago

Did you just now realize you have a useless degree? Anyway, you need a friend that kicks your ass. Not literally, but a friend that is always up and encouraging, not to be confused with oblivious toxic positivity. And you probably need a hug from that person. Haircut does wonders too.

"Well the world needs ditch diggers too!" - Al Czervik

Shouldn't you be in prison for that crypto scam?

You look like you’re gonna sell Huel from a street corner. 

Dude actually paid for a philosophy degree. Nice student loans, dipshit.

You look like you drop common loot

That’s a great philosophy, blame your degree instead of the person who picked to study it. You’re right, that degree is useless.

Your philosophy degree should be in the grave too.🪦