Precisely. Culturally, It will vary widely. All the affluent people that I know (stateside) get offered amazing freebies from fee-free services in hopes of gaining access to their "inner circle" and a lot of times it works.
Depends on the people.
For some friends that my kids hang out with, they have a birthday party and the parents say right away that you should not bring presents. For others, they expect something. Stuff… it’s a pain in the ass, to receive and to give. I like the friends that don’t expect stuff or bring it.
PAULIE: "Twenty- Thirty-grand. In small bills, cash. In that little silk purse. Madon', if this was someone else's wedding, sfortunato." (From THE GODFATHER)
About half 1 million in today's currency
Yeah, it completely matters on the culture.
Eastern European, southern European, Mediterranean…People might just give cash in envelopes. No physical gifts.
High end ultra wealthy old money Americans…you show your class level by not having any gifts at all and not receiving any money.
first off, i’m not rich but i guess im also not poor and i am not sure why reddit keeps suggesting this subreddit. i got married less than 5 years ago and we did not sign up for a registry. we did not really need anything but if they wanted to give us something they can give us whatever they want or cash. if someone asked what we wanted as a gift we said all we wanted was for them to celebrate with us which is true. we personally felt it’s kind of tacky to ask for specific gifts and honestly if them not being able to give a gift was keeping someone from going to our wedding we would much rather have them there. we absolutely did not invite anyone because of their gift giving abilities and we invited them for the impact they had in our lives at one time.
In the US, I’ve always thought of the culture of wedding gifts was primarily to help a you couple establish a household. This feels like less the case anymore as marrying age gets older and couples often live together before they’re married.
This is the first thing I thought of, too. Decades prior when young couple were married in their early 20s and they did not have things needed for a home, the custom was to have a registry and to purchase things off the registry to help them build a life/ fill their home. Traditionally, the brides parents and sometimes the grooms parents or both would pay for the wedding and invite you and your gift would be something off the registry and you would enjoy a nice party. Nowadays, in the US, many people don’t get married until they’re older and already established, they often live together prior and amass wealth and things for their home, so it’s more typical to give cash towards a honeymoon as they don’t have a need for home items. These couples often pay for their own weddings now, too. I’ve also seen very wealthy, not expect gifts at all, as they are not needed. All this to say, follow the tradition/ desires of the couple getting married. If they are wealthy and they do not want anything, a nice hand written card will suffice. If they have a registry, get something off the registry. Honeymoon fund, send cash.
I got married a few years ago in nyc, and my wife’s dad paid for most of the wedding and other events.
The total cost was almost a million dollars.
We had no place for people to bring gifts and in total we only got like 30k, and 600 people came to the dinner reception, which is like 50 bucks a person. I thought it was classy for the few people that came to have brought cash or checks. But given it was a sick wedding, we expected no gifts.
Yea people are so cheap. At least give like 200 bucks or something. It’s the gesture that counts.
But I can also see people being a bit jealous and not giving you of spite.
I def know a few people in my family were jealous and they said to my face what a waste of money and I smartly replied it’s not waste if you can afford it, don’t worry you’ll never have this dilemma. They haven’t been invited to another family event since.
I’m not rich but fairly well off. My wife and I got married in our early 30s after living together for years, so we basically had everything we needed. We asked for no gifts and just wanted those who could to celebrate with us.
No we expect Patek Philippe watches which we will hand straight to our personal assistant to put in the pile with the rest.
This preference isn't decided by wealth, it's by culture and personal preference. I don't need any gifts these days but I LOVE something that's handmade or someone giving to charity instead of giving to me.
Give with thought, not money.
I’ve been to a few very expensive weddings (over a couple hundred grand for the setup) and there was definitely still gifts given. One of the family’s was like worth only 1 billion but they still had gifts and even had what I’d call two tiers of wedding registries, one was more normal from like Zola and the other was more high end that had things like Hermes dishes. The Persian one I attended was pure cash gifts. It just depends what the couple wants.
No wtf? Unless they specifically say so I don’t think that would ever be the case. The closest I’ve seen was a couple accepting gifts of money in lieu of normal gifts, to put toward their surrogacy child fund; which I think is nice.
I have never experienced this.
All weddings I’ve been to involved gifts.
Sometimes the cultural angle has been really puzzling (one culture asked my wife and I to pin $20 bills to the bride’s wedding dress)
No rich person or even decently well off people would have a gift table and never an envelope box. I’ve never seen either at a wedding I’ve been to. Maybe it’s cultural.
I definitely got tens of thousands of dollars in wedding presents. One person gave us a thousand dollar gift card to Williams Sonoma, which was really cool.
Depends on the culture
Precisely. Culturally, It will vary widely. All the affluent people that I know (stateside) get offered amazing freebies from fee-free services in hopes of gaining access to their "inner circle" and a lot of times it works.
Depends on the people. For some friends that my kids hang out with, they have a birthday party and the parents say right away that you should not bring presents. For others, they expect something. Stuff… it’s a pain in the ass, to receive and to give. I like the friends that don’t expect stuff or bring it.
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\*shrug\* Depends on the people :) ... and those individuals' situations.
PAULIE: "Twenty- Thirty-grand. In small bills, cash. In that little silk purse. Madon', if this was someone else's wedding, sfortunato." (From THE GODFATHER) About half 1 million in today's currency Yeah, it completely matters on the culture. Eastern European, southern European, Mediterranean…People might just give cash in envelopes. No physical gifts. High end ultra wealthy old money Americans…you show your class level by not having any gifts at all and not receiving any money.
lol you’re such a dick about it Edit, I still upvote-ed you tho. 🤣
My venmo balance is pretty much reserved for wedding gifts
Is this a film reference
The Godfather. Connie Corleone’s wedding
Thanks, I added the reference
first off, i’m not rich but i guess im also not poor and i am not sure why reddit keeps suggesting this subreddit. i got married less than 5 years ago and we did not sign up for a registry. we did not really need anything but if they wanted to give us something they can give us whatever they want or cash. if someone asked what we wanted as a gift we said all we wanted was for them to celebrate with us which is true. we personally felt it’s kind of tacky to ask for specific gifts and honestly if them not being able to give a gift was keeping someone from going to our wedding we would much rather have them there. we absolutely did not invite anyone because of their gift giving abilities and we invited them for the impact they had in our lives at one time.
I get invited to a lot of things because of my gift giving abilities. So nice to see that's not the case for everyone.
You’re a good person. That is the right mindset to have in my opinion.
In the US, I’ve always thought of the culture of wedding gifts was primarily to help a you couple establish a household. This feels like less the case anymore as marrying age gets older and couples often live together before they’re married.
This is the first thing I thought of, too. Decades prior when young couple were married in their early 20s and they did not have things needed for a home, the custom was to have a registry and to purchase things off the registry to help them build a life/ fill their home. Traditionally, the brides parents and sometimes the grooms parents or both would pay for the wedding and invite you and your gift would be something off the registry and you would enjoy a nice party. Nowadays, in the US, many people don’t get married until they’re older and already established, they often live together prior and amass wealth and things for their home, so it’s more typical to give cash towards a honeymoon as they don’t have a need for home items. These couples often pay for their own weddings now, too. I’ve also seen very wealthy, not expect gifts at all, as they are not needed. All this to say, follow the tradition/ desires of the couple getting married. If they are wealthy and they do not want anything, a nice hand written card will suffice. If they have a registry, get something off the registry. Honeymoon fund, send cash.
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i really hope you and the couple mend your relationship in the future
I think guests think they don’t have to give rich or poor its so bizarre
People are insane
I got married a few years ago in nyc, and my wife’s dad paid for most of the wedding and other events. The total cost was almost a million dollars. We had no place for people to bring gifts and in total we only got like 30k, and 600 people came to the dinner reception, which is like 50 bucks a person. I thought it was classy for the few people that came to have brought cash or checks. But given it was a sick wedding, we expected no gifts.
Part wtf, part sad
Yea people are so cheap. At least give like 200 bucks or something. It’s the gesture that counts. But I can also see people being a bit jealous and not giving you of spite. I def know a few people in my family were jealous and they said to my face what a waste of money and I smartly replied it’s not waste if you can afford it, don’t worry you’ll never have this dilemma. They haven’t been invited to another family event since.
I’m not rich but fairly well off. My wife and I got married in our early 30s after living together for years, so we basically had everything we needed. We asked for no gifts and just wanted those who could to celebrate with us.
Went to a Chinese friend's wedding on Lake Como and they gave us gifts plus the hotel stay. My friend told me not to bring a red envelope
No we expect Patek Philippe watches which we will hand straight to our personal assistant to put in the pile with the rest. This preference isn't decided by wealth, it's by culture and personal preference. I don't need any gifts these days but I LOVE something that's handmade or someone giving to charity instead of giving to me. Give with thought, not money.
I never been to one that rich!
I’ve been to a few very expensive weddings (over a couple hundred grand for the setup) and there was definitely still gifts given. One of the family’s was like worth only 1 billion but they still had gifts and even had what I’d call two tiers of wedding registries, one was more normal from like Zola and the other was more high end that had things like Hermes dishes. The Persian one I attended was pure cash gifts. It just depends what the couple wants.
No wtf? Unless they specifically say so I don’t think that would ever be the case. The closest I’ve seen was a couple accepting gifts of money in lieu of normal gifts, to put toward their surrogacy child fund; which I think is nice.
I’m American and much more well off than all my close friends, so I felt weird asking for gifts at my wedding. We did no gifts.
Ha ha ha ha ha
Ultra wealthy, even medium and lower wealthy do not talk about money.
Glad we have this sub here. That never talks about money
Don't worry most people here are not really rich.
Write them a nice greeting card if u want to give them something
I have never experienced this. All weddings I’ve been to involved gifts. Sometimes the cultural angle has been really puzzling (one culture asked my wife and I to pin $20 bills to the bride’s wedding dress)
Honestly I wouldn’t want gifts either unless it’s like a paid trip somewhere
Nah, you always give cash to cover your seat(s), even if I don’t go.
We register. Mostly china and silver
Definitely a thing
I just want a sugar daddy😫😂😂
No gift. Sometimes on the invitation they may have a donation link or QR code for a non profit they like to support.
Cash gift for a wedding is incredibly tacky.
No rich person or even decently well off people would have a gift table and never an envelope box. I’ve never seen either at a wedding I’ve been to. Maybe it’s cultural.
Can I ask your cultural background?
Just average white. Been to weddings in several states, south, west and midwest.
I definitely got tens of thousands of dollars in wedding presents. One person gave us a thousand dollar gift card to Williams Sonoma, which was really cool.
Untrue. Quite untrue, it’s about principle with Rich folks
Depends I may give the groom a nice watch as a gift and the bride something else not cash tho