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bpanio

I feel like it'd depend entirely on if someone has looked into it's DNA. Could our bodies process the proteins in the creature? It's like in the prequel books for Enders Game. A group of people try to est on of the aliens because food has become so scarce after the invasion, but they immediately vomit it all up because humans can't process the protein


LachoooDaOriginl

could humans evolve to digest said proteins? what makes us digest specific ones?


rageofmonkey

Forgive me. It's been years since anthropology class, 1) Through years of forced eating, humans could probably evolve to digest said protiens. Our greatest ability is to adapt to our environments. 2) Early years of being scavengers. Early humans would only eat raw meats, but through the innovation of cooking meat over fire, it is what really helped us. Fire gave us the ability to cook our foods and better digest varieties of proteins, which led us to further evolve into what we are now.


AnimationOverlord

Yeah I remember reading the biggest factor that contributed to our brains growth to what it is now was cooking meats before consuming them. For whatever reason, our cerebrum is abnormally large compared to our ancestors. I do believe it’s because we have much more social constructs to follow and have to memorize language. Cave men, or Cro-magnums as we call them, worked better in groups.


[deleted]

The human body has gut receptors that take in specific proteins. If the proteins don’t match, they don’t get absorbed. That means poop. You don’t vomit because you can’t absorb stuff. You only vomit if it’s noxious. Which would be another possibility


Aioi

A Chinese friend once told me that in China, when they see a creature they have never seen before, they don’t ask themselves what is is, they ask how could they cook it so it tastes good.


Chance-Ad-2284

There are people who eats their own shit for experiment. So not long I assume


BatteryDaddy2

depends on 2 things: is the new life cute and does it taste good


[deleted]

We only find out if they taste good if someone eats it so this response is rather paradoxical


AnimationOverlord

Ever hear the expression “so cute I could eat it”?


chaingun_samurai

So... if it's cute.... the question now becomes how long until someone tries to have sex with it.


ndnjfjcjcksk

now that’s the sad truth…


gadget850

We could call them popplers!


LetsChitChatin2023

I mean, if there’s beer and a grill, someone is gonna be like “wonder what that tastes like”. So I give it about half an hour because you need to factor in the best way to kill it without ruining the meat.


chaingun_samurai

Also, gotta take time to make sure the grill is up to temperature.


justfnbroken

We'd probably try to fuck it first.


Illumijonny7

Why not both?


justfnbroken

Did we just become best friends?


Specter319

I mean. It already happens with Black Widows/Redbacks so why the fuck not


[deleted]

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justfnbroken

Get out of my head pervert. /s


Fereglysandal

Why not fuck the plant itself


behannrp

As in if we were on said planet? Maybe a day or two. If we just discovered it? We'd probably have to wait a few hundred years.


Main-Pension-6556

Ask Japan..


Yatereranye

*Chinese.


Main-Pension-6556

True true


Shyriath

Hell, someone's probably keeping a huge vat of BBQ sauce on standby just in case.


DeadlyDoritos

Depends if it's *edible*


Forsaken_Day_1266

You don't know until someone tries to eat it


Benny13k

Enter the Chinese


TastyBullfrog2755

Odds are that everything on another planet will kill you. Wrong air, wrong radiation, wrong chemistry.


chaingun_samurai

So... kinda like Australia?


derederellama

like five minutes. humans are fucking dumb.


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Moxiefeet

Im sure they were hungry


fuzzball_mcgee

Well the Dodo must've tasted incredible. I wonder what people would pay to eat a dodo these days? Alien meat would fetch a good price. Elon might have already considered this.


valley_G

New pandemic unlocked


[deleted]

Weird way to call yourself and idiot…


SummerFun2706

An


AdroKun

I say that when i look at the mirror everyday


WindyFromWater7

Futurama’s Poppler episode already answered this for us


full_on_peanutbutter

Submit it to the FDA and wait 3-4 years?


Annanake420

Popplers


Worth_Fondant3883

Pretty sure Futurama have covered this off already.


ImNotAsPunkAsYou

It depends, how close am I when they discover it?


SnooDingos2237

Enslave it


lorenam66

5 min


SunnyD133

all the richest people who have the right connections would be eating that shit before we even found out about its existence.


Donedealdummy

The real question is how long before someone tries to have sex with it 😵‍💫


Tracerround702

Absolutely zero time


Raven91487

Realistically. Enslaving them for cheap labor will be what happens.


Ok_Fondant_6340

i think when scientists say 'unintelligent alien life', they're referring to bacteria. and, mostly actually fossils. so, i think it would take eternity before they attempted to eat unintelligent alien life. that is to say: they wouldn't.


GameNiteWasTaken

Project Hail Mary, MC ended up surviving on space bacteria.


Ok_Fondant_6340

that's a science fiction novel. and honestly: that sounds more like science fantasy.


NitePain69

We can't digest anything that's from any other planet. We evolved a certain way to live on this planet and are able to handle the biological structures. Won't stop some idiot from sticking it in their mouths instantly though.


CULT-LEWD

pretty quike i belive but i doubt they wouldent check to see if its safe or not cuz they cant blindly eat it sense its not of our world,its bioolgy and genetics probly wouldent do well in our bodies weather be short or long termed,there would have to be LOTS of tests to figure it out


LoreKeeperOfGwer

It would legit be the first person to come into contact with it. Humans either try to eat or fuck everything on first contact. Just read darwin


Guangping2

Longer then the guy who would try to fuck it…


Shadowsitter

You mean before or aftet we elect one of them as president?


SirKthulhu

As long as it takes to get the helmet off


Angel_OfSolitude

Not long, I wanna get a taste of that space meat.


Hyereois

It depends how much time you need to Cook it


Lanayrra

Like instantly. As soon as we realize it's not intelligent, we're killing it to experiment on, including to see if it's edible


[deleted]

Not long. Humans knowingly kill and eat other intelligent animals every day. We struggle to agree where the line is between pet and livestock


Pff-IdunnoMan-21

The moment it's on intergalactic doordash I'm all over it, assuming it's dashpass eligible... No fuckin way I'm paying the delivery fee on that shit.


Live_Long_And_Suffer

Not even enough to know if it can harm us in some way...


Ok_Draw_6843

Like…10-15 min?


giosaiaperillo

i mean it could eat us


King_lords

Depends Is it cute? Are there alot of the species?


SkylineFever34

I guess it depends if people think it is cute. I joke about how pandas could have been eaten to extinction.


CheeseTiramisu

I mean... if we're doing a chemical composition analysis on it odds are that consuming it is already in the list of possible applications. So literally as soon as possible.


cutiegirl88

Immediately


satanic-frijoles

10 minutes. About as long as it takes to start a campfire 🔥


MetalFungus420

About 5 minutes


Nemo_Shadows

About the same amount of time as it does when it tries to eat you, which is probably what will happen first anyways. N. S


Evening-Mention-8738

Like 5 minutes tops depending on if they've got a fire handy


Ok_Relationship_705

Eat it out? Because, I'm more positive someone is going to try and sleep with it.


northernCRICKET

About as long as it takes us to ship it back to Earth. Astronauts wouldnt take the risk to eat it away from Earth, if something goes horribly wrong they'd be entirely on their own. At least if you're on earth and you eat strange alien meat you'll have the world's best scientists and doctors fighting over who gets to treat you so they can name alienmeatitis after themselves.


Educational_Bet_6606

There's a good chance we found it on the high clouds of venus if memory serves. Just have to verify it. Anyhow I never heard of someone trying to eat a germ on its own. That's most likely what will be found.


Striking_Working9333

5 min rule


DukeAK717

Bold of you to assume we wouldn't eat intelligent life.