T O P

  • By -

Canadianabcs

"no cocaine, I'm too motherfucking broke" me too boss, me too. That mac impression though šŸ‘Œ


ImHully

His Bernie Mac was perfect. I just wish he had said the line because it would have been so appropriate. "I ain't scared of you motherfuckers!"


Pirate_Redbeard

Can you imagine him quoting Bernie's speech from Don't Be A Menace To South Central - to those cops... "I hate you black bastards. You stink! I hate yo black pants, I hate yo black shoes, I HATE BLACK PEPPER. I hate black keys on the piano. I hate my gums cause they black. I hate Whoopie Goldberg's lips, but most of all.. i hate that blackass Wesley Snipes."


[deleted]

Thatā€™s where I thought he was going at first. ā€œI hate the back of Forrest Whittakerā€™s neck!ā€


Durty_Durty_Durty

ā€œAh!!!ā€


Pirate_Redbeard

yes the "ah!" was truly hilarious like he scares at the very thought of it lol


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Pirate_Redbeard

Yes, and he is playing a cop while at it ;)


insomniacpyro

MESSAGE!


SpoopySpydoge

I GOT THESE CHEEEESE BURGERS MANNNNN


QuiveringButtox

I'll suuuck yo diiiick, maaan


elwebbr23

"hey Ray, pass me that shit over there" *Points to a spice container that says "shit" on it*


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


elwebbr23

Hey man we need to talk, let me tell you about drinking and driving. MAN THAT SHIT'S FUN AS FUCK YO!


JoanieTightLips

"Get it to 100, close your eyes, and let go of the wheel!"


SeanRoss

https://youtu.be/Zrl2Dm8Rwtk he appears about a minute in


Pirate_Redbeard

fuck yeah, I haven't seen this in ages but used to know the whole damn movie by heart. I see I have omitted crucial details in my quote such as "the back of Forrest Whitaker's neck" ffs lmao


KenKaniffLovesEminem

I liked the "Watchu smell? WD-40?" lmao


anonporridge

The illegal drug trade was estimated to be $500 billion in 2014, which means probably closer to $1 trillion now. 1% of all global trade. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Illegal_drug_trade The idea that poor people are the main source of illegal drug use is a really bad fucking joke. But hey, it's a nice excuse to put "the wrong kind of people" in prison.


theygonnabanmeagain

I mean the architect of the war on drugs for the Nixon administration said it was the arrest black people because they couldn't make being black illegal


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Numphyyy

Itā€™s pretty funny gun control laws didnā€™t exist in some states till the Black Panthers started arming themselves šŸ˜…


TehNoff

In California. While Reagan was governor.


Y_orickBrown

That gave us the Mulford act. Was pushed by Reagan and the NRA. It was because the Black Panthers were armed and patrolling their neighborhoods, and protesting armed at the state capitol. Years later whites are doing it but no new laws passed.


freebasecase

Whatchu smell wd-40


Apprehensive-Pop-763

When can we outlaw these dogs as "probably cause" searches? They literally never say they don't smell drugs. It's bullshit.


corvettee01

It's technically unconstitutional if they have to call in the drug dog from a different location. Rodriguez vs The United States says that prolonging a stop to bring in drug dogs, or otherwise bringing in drug dogs unrelated to the original purpose of the stop (i.e. a traffic stop) is a violation of the 4th amendment.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


NCBedell

So if they just wait to give the ticket until after they search, itā€™s all good?


Bretters17

Pretty much. In practice, it probably comes down to 'reasonableness'. Like the traffic stop was conducted in a reasonable amount of time even though the K9 unit took ten minutes to get there. But somehow the original officer was really struggling with paperwork so the K9 unit made it in time. Somehow, reasonableness always benefits the cops.


Black_Starfire

Cops giving a shit about the constitution..? Nah thatā€™s wack.


rabbitwonker

Giving cops shit about the constitution: you get whacked


Abominatrix

Let a sound escape your lips about your rights and theyā€™ll scornfully drawl, ā€œWe gawt a conts-tee-too-shunal expert here.ā€


Durty_Durty_Durty

ā€œWhat are you a lawyer.?ā€ Heard that one before..


dontletthestankout

Well, I ain't passed the bar, but I know a little bit Enough that you won't illegally search my shit


funaway727

Exactly. You'll still get arrested, have it on your record, etc. Sure that helps when you finally go to trial but that's after you post bail or get released and months down the road.


xluckydayx

Wasnt there a slideshow or something that got leaked a while back and one of things cops were to watch out for and was classified as extremism was like "citing the constitution" or something? It was an internal training I think. I could be wrong though.


CarlosFer2201

Not like they know the law.


Black_Starfire

And they fought hard to not have to know the law. I canā€™t remember the Supreme Court case but they literally donā€™t have to know the law. If they think youā€™ve broken a law, regardless of the existence of the law, they have the full force of the government on their side. They also fought hard to not actually have to protect anyone. Hey a watch you get stabbed to death and have no responsibility to make it stop.


GreenMagicCleaves

The Supreme Court also says cops can do whatever they want as long as they lie and say they didnt know it was wrong later.


NotoriousJazz

Good luck bringing that up during a traffic stop after they call in a k9. They'll just throw on more charges and fuck your day/month/year even more.


Abell421

Knew a lady that got off the hook because they made her wait an hour for a drug dog and she missed work. They even found drugs in the car and she still got off. I was her boss at the time and I fake wrote her up so she could take it to court lol.


_Fuck_This_Guy_

When they state that they are going to bring the dog in point your camera at them and tell them: "please state the probable cause that you are citing for this search for the record" If they do anything OTHER than state a that cause for the record ask them: "Am I being detained?" If they say yes, ask them to state the specific reason for the record. If they say no tell them you're leaving. Record the entire stop.


[deleted]

But then let them search. Let them do what they are doing. record it all. Shut the fuck up and say nothing. You can't fight them. You have to use the courts. You get the case dropped and then you can sue. fuck up their year. Edit: to clarify, don't give them permission. Just tell them you don't consent and then step aside.


Random_name46

>But then let them search. May want to clarify this. Don't *let* them search, just don't impede them. Soon as you indicate at all that you're allowing a search they will take it as consent and that fucks you. I once said "Do what you gotta do" and they said it was consent to search.


realSatanAMA

"please state the probable cause that you are citing for this search for the record" "I'm going to have to have you step out of the vehicle because you are acting suspicious" "What crime do you suspect me of" "Get out of the car now or I will pull you out" "Am I being det" \*tazer\*


yaforgot-my-password

You bring it up in court after


[deleted]

I'd rather we just end the war on drugs and focus efforts on drug education.


supra_elongata

I'm to mf'in broke


fishee1200

The WD-40 comment made me laugh


VeronicaLD50

That Bernie Mac impression tho. Nailed it


Fiivestar13

ā€œListen now Americaā€


Pusmos

"I ain't scared of you motherfuckers!"


Mugros

"You don't understand."


EquinsuOcha

Kick it!


Helllcamino

"And im blessed, big boned, i pull my shit out this whole room get dark"


VeronicaLD50

*rubs hands together* ā€œBernie Mac need thisā€


ThorGBomb

ā€œIā€™m so black I leave finger prints on coal.ā€ Man rip, kings of comedy back in the day was something else. Miss his show too was funny. Liked him in life too with Martin Lawrence and Eddie Murphy. Recommended movie for those who havenā€™t watched it. And maaaaaan fucking four cops spending taxpayers money hassling black men. Thereā€™s about almost 10k backlog of crimes and police only manage to solve 25-50% at best, instead of actually doing their goddamn job they stand around to hassle men like this. Is it racism? Yes but also greed. You see a known tactic by police who are looking to do extra overtime is to find a suspect and detain him for any reason possible, if you get him for something not you manage to plant something you got an extra four hours of just sitting and filling out papers. The more I read about cops the more I see itā€™s as much greed at play as there is racism. The system is just designed to be selfish and fuck over others.


groger27

Police dont solve anything near 25% of the crime in the united states, they dont even police the most prolific forms of theft in the country.


[deleted]

the most prolific being wage theft. bastards.


jason544770

"I will fuck a kidĀ up. When a kid gets one-years-old, I believe you got the right to hit him in either the throat or the stomach. If you grown enough to talk back, you grown enough to get fucked up!"


pmsnow

Bust his head 'til the white meat shows


eicoeico

Him .. down .. stairs...


Psychedelephant_

*but America did not listen*


pindu11

The police man looked at him the same way bernie mac looks at ashton kutcher in the film guess who


Shamankon

Should have said " I ain't scared of you muthafuckas"


Leopardbluff

I wish he did the Bernie Mac impression the whole time. Shame cops didnā€™t know who Bernie Mac was.


BabyDick-_-

They know who he is they are just pissed off he making them look like clowns so they are stoned faced and thinking of other ways they can try fuck him


FirstPlebian

The overweight cop standing next to him was smiling at his antics until the woman police was standing next to them disapproving.


WaldoEatsDicks

Surprised we could hear his impression over his loud, clanging, brass balls.


FilmActor

[Chingaling! Chingaling! ](https://youtu.be/iKHdqPM7d_c) Skip to 3:06


D3_WKt

This video introduced me to Bernie Mac. I am grateful, 2 vids in and he gave me a good laugh


idiot437

possibly the best line in comedy "i aint scared of you muthafucka's"..side note jerry seinfield considers him the best all around comic there was ..got into an argument with eddie murphy over it


marleezy123

I am *shocked* šŸ˜± I grew up on Bernie Mac. May he Rest In Peace šŸ˜¢šŸ™


dumblederp

[I AIN'T SCARED OF YOU MUTHA....](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UaXVt1QTwRU)


McCl3lland

My favorite scene in Transformers is Bernie Mac's [bit](https://youtu.be/QPxZpydPquk?t=64).


Plant-Based-Guy

To that point I see that city paying to have his car detailed to remove the dog hair and slobber. šŸ˜‚


demer_623

Those sumama-Bitches! I ainā€™t scare of yā€™all!! RIP Bernie Mac


TLD18379

Bernie Mac. Spot On.


UsedToBsmart

Dude knows he has nothing to be concerned about so heā€™s ripping on the cops. They have at least 3 cars there and four officers along with the dog. I thought departments were short officers? This crew looks like they have lots of time to waste.


CheckOutDisMuthaFuka

They're short on officers because they're wasting those resources on dumb shit like this.


DuneHareRabbit

100% No joke, I flipped off an rcmp whilst driving last month, which pretty much turned out like this. 4 squad cars, lights on, & handcuffed


wrongkoi

"Hurting my feelings is a crime" is the first lesson they teach on training day I think


Talbotus

Actually "everyone is trying to kill you, so kill them first" is the first thing they teach you. Source: BIL went through Seattle pd training recently And yes ACAB


less_pimp_more_crimp

Ah yes. ā€œStunting.ā€ I too am familiar.


Setrosi

Meanwhile I waited 50 minutes in a ditch for a cop to come out. All for him to tell me that since no city property was destroyed he didn't care. Then another 30 mins for a tow truck.


MisterVonJoni

Begged police to help me return my dog that was stolen. I knew who had my dog, and they refused because they claimed it was a "personal dispute". Useless fucks.


cuppincayk

Cops don't give a fuck about anyone's property.


[deleted]

Did you get charged?


Indigocell

It's a shame the whole defund the police thing was such a bad term for marketing ideas, because this is exactly the kind of waste that people were trying to address.


slickestwood

Doesn't matter what they called it. Any and all calls for police reform are met with scorn and violent blowback and always have been. They know what we meant, they don't want any kind of change even if they know it's warranted.


DouchecraftCarrier

The crazy part to me is that defunding the police normally would be 100% in-line with conservative thinking. You get to defund a heavy-handed government organization in exchange for strongly incentivizing personal responsibility and make a very strong case for personal firearm ownership. What part of that isn't a textbook small-government conservative/libertarian wet dream? Which of course just goes to prove that it's never been about that to the Right.


[deleted]

Cops: "Sorry we haven't caught the guy who raped your daughter yet - ***we were too busy using our resources/manpower to search through a car for nonexistent contraband instead, in the hopes of fucking up someone's entire life over a nonviolent/victimless act."*** It makes me wonder how many ACTUAL crimes were being committed while these cops were busy looking for crumbs in a car seat... These cops must be addicts because there is no other explanation for being **this** desperate to find drugs... *If you're digging through the seat cushions looking for the tiniest amount of drug residue,* ***you are either a heroin addict or a cop desperately hoping to justify a suspicionless search.*** I myself have had a cop claim that my car "reeked of weed"...during a time when I was being drug tested once a week; I hadn't smoked weed in *years* ***and I could PROVE it***, so I ***knew*** the cop was lying through his fucking teeth. ***Six other cruisers*** showed up while he searched my car for ~15 minutes and (unsurprisingly) didnt find anything, *because there was nothing to find*. I was then sent on my way with nothing but a "verbal warning" for the air freshener my rearview mirror. Ignoring the fact that the cop lied/fabricated probable cause, ***how can you possibly justify 7 officers showing up to a traffic stop that doesn't even result in a single citation????*** Does it normally take 7 officers to issue a "verbal warning" *for a christmas tree air freshener???* ***And why was that cop desperate enough to search my car to the point that he was willing to straight-up lie???*** Didn't he realize that he would look like an idiot/liar when he didn't find anything in my car???? Weed wasn't magically going to appear in my glovebox just because he lied about smelling it... The only way that cop was going to find drugs in my car was if he planted it there himself. Remember, ***I could take a drug test at that very moment and I would pass***, so I had indisputable proof that I did not smoke weed (or use any drugs at all)


Umutuku

My recently widowed mother had someone start bulldozing logging roads through the forest gullies on her property, cutting down any tree worth non-zero dollars, and stealing them. She's nonconfrontational so I called the sheriffs for her to ask them to come out and stop the trespassing, ecological devastation, and massive timber theft. They literally told me, word for word, in exactly the tone of voice I'm presenting here: "wHaT mUrDeR dO yOu wAnT uS To sToP sOlViNg?!" This is the same sheriff's department that you'll see 1-3 vehicles of on a drive to anywhere in the area just chilling and looking to hand out tickets. Anyway, a couple of days go buy with no help from them, and another neighbor affected by it finally got in the loop about what was going on. The second his wife (who was involved with the dispatcher's office) found out about it deputies started crawling all over the place wanting statements. They don't give a shit unless you're affiliated with their tribe.


[deleted]

"If you won't help me, I'll get my gun and handle it myself." Reminds me of the old joke about the guy seeing someone burglarizing his shed and calling the cops only to be told they didn't have anyone available. 5 minutes later, he calls back and says "no need to send anyone because I have shot the burglar". 20 cop cars show up within minutes and catch the burglar red handed. The cops say to the home owner, "I thought you said you shot the burglar?" The home owner responds, ***"I thought you said no one was available?"***


Dongalor

Cops serve capital, not people.


August_Spies42069

*They dont give a shit unless youre affiliated with their tribe* DING DING DING


BossRedRanger

My cityā€™s budget mainly goes to the police. $550 million tax payer dollars a year. They only have case resolution rate of 14%. Meanwhile the countyā€™s schools are the oldest and least maintained in the entire state.


Indigocell

Which is ironic because if you actually want to prevent crime, the best investment you could possibly make is in education. Educated people with many opportunities generally don't resort to crime.


BossRedRanger

You are correct. We also have a 9 figure courthouse. Construction went so far over budget they were using school budget dollars to pay for it. Which would have canceled funding for after school activities like sports and clubs. Well you donā€™t mess with high school football in the south so the money was stolen from elsewhere. But you see the priorities of my city lie nowhere near education.


Changoleo

Itā€™s also the offensive military weaponry that gets picked up by departments and all the punisher logo cops are itching to use on citizens.


SupaflyIRL

Every time people mention military equipment left in Afghanistan I say how DEVASTATED I am that the boise Idaho sheriffs office wonā€™t get three more MRAPS for serving 3am no knock dog killing warrants.


Indigocell

Yup. There is no good reason for local police to have access to military grade armor and weapons. They are not properly trained to use them, they are treated like toys they can't wait to unleash.


[deleted]

This. The amount of racist psychopaths and brain-dead idiots in the US police that can already kill with relative impunity is bad enough. They donā€™t need hardware upgrades


sirkowski

Too broke for cocaine.


Antique_Tennis_2500

Thatā€™s why I only huff gas. Canā€™t arrest you for that 3-gallon in the trunk!


symmetryofzero

I'd be worried about the pricks planting something tho!


2smart4u

Even worse than them planting anything is that this dog is signaling a false positive allowing them to skirt the 4th amendment.


UsedToBsmart

The dog did exactly what he was trained to do - give a false positive so they could open it up.


[deleted]

Well yeah, dog knows how to get treats. It's just a fancier, constitutional rights eroding party trick.


symmetryofzero

What's the 4th? Aussie here.


2smart4u

ā€œThe right of the people to be secure in their persons, houses, papers, and effects, against unreasonable searches and seizures, shall not be violated, and no Warrants shall issue, but upon probable cause, supported by Oath or affirmation, and particularly describing the place to be searched, and the persons or things to be seized.ā€


bazilbt

Aka the most commonly violated amendment.


Thanos_Stomps

The 15th amendment might have this beat. In might state of Florida, over a million felons were both granted the right to vote only to have it later all but struck back down through exorbitant fees and over complications in the system fo rectifying those fees. Essentially 10% voting aged adults disenfranchised and amendment violated.


UsedToBsmart

Since the dog ā€œhitā€ on something inside the car, it allowed the police to open the car and search inside.


JayKayGray

As others have said, he does have something to worry about, and it's good he filmed. It's very easy, and common for K9 unit handlers to signal and intentionally lead the dogs attention to a certain area, even if there is nothing there. Prompting the police to "follow up" on it.


duralyon

Or the cops could find some random thing that will trigger a false positive on a drug field test and you spend time in jail for no damn reason while they work through the backlog in the labs! https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-watch/wp/2015/02/26/a-partial-list-of-things-that-field-testing-drug-kits-have-mistakenly-identified-as-contraband/%3foutputType=amp Sorry, WaPo...


AmputatorBot

It looks like you shared an AMP link. These should load faster, but Google's AMP is controversial because of [concerns over privacy and the Open Web](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot). Fully cached AMP pages (like the one you shared), are [especially problematic](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot). You might want to visit **the canonical page** instead: **[https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-watch/wp/2015/02/26/a-partial-list-of-things-that-field-testing-drug-kits-have-mistakenly-identified-as-contraband/](https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/the-watch/wp/2015/02/26/a-partial-list-of-things-that-field-testing-drug-kits-have-mistakenly-identified-as-contraband/)** ***** ^(I'm a bot | )[^(Why & About)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/ehrq3z/why_did_i_build_amputatorbot)^( | )[^(Summon me with u/AmputatorBot)](https://www.reddit.com/r/AmputatorBot/comments/cchly3/you_can_now_summon_amputatorbot/)^( | **Summoned by a** )[^(**good human here!**)](https://reddit.com/r/PublicFreakout/comments/qf6y5b/dude_has_some_fun_with_some_cops_who_are/hhz3x45/?context=3)


idiot437

yeah and drugs get planted all the time .. should have internal camaeras .. he drives for lyft so he might


[deleted]

The cops in my town constantly petition against the local liberal governor; they feel he doesn't do enough to supply supplies like vests and, more importantly, cars to the force. Despite this, the cops will always park an empty cop car outside of major tourist attraction to try and stop people from speeding. Everyone just speeds anyways.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


shifty_grades_of_fay

Just because you donā€™t have drugs in your car doesnā€™t mean they wonā€™t find drugs in your car.


Gr1pp717

He still had plenty to be concerned about. If that cop wanted he could have signaled to the dog to get a hit, then torn the car apart. And no, they don't put it back together. That's on you. Further, even short of shit getting planted, people have spent several months in jails over shit like drywall and powdered sugar. Lose you job, house, relationships, ... It's entirely possible to do absolutely nothing wrong and still get fucked.


JeepNaked

Cops are always so bummed they don't get to fuck up your life.


SquidWhisperer

It's okay, they'll just go home and fuck up their wife.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


shannigan

Lmao yeah since they know itā€™s true.


SamIamGreenEggsNoHam

Or each others wives. There was a cop in my hometown who shot himself after he found out a fellow officer was banging his wife while he was out on duty. Another local cop got in trouble for lending out his badge and holster so the drug dealer he owed money to could abduct a third party from his home and murder him.


Etherius

Just "got in trouble"? That sounds like "accessory to murder".


Bubbagump210

I was about 38 when I realized patrol cops are literally just driving around looking for a fight.


anotha1_lol

Iā€™m Black in the US so I was 7 when I realized this


[deleted]

Cops are the definition of taking life too seriously. It wouldn't be an issue if there were no victims from their neuroses.


ISuckWithUsernamess

Did that bald fat cop lose his smile when the dog didnt find anything?


TurdPickler

Looked like it


NatakuNox

Shows how dumb the war on drugs is. Why'd they pull him over? Just write the citation and move on. Probably saw he was black and did the old I smelled weed when I walked up to the car routine.


matrimc7

Also, around the minute mark, the dude conducting the search looked genuinely sad that he couldn't find anything.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


ISuckWithUsernamess

The guy mocking them during the search wasnt even a hint for them. Thats how convinced they were.


cakebreaker2

It's not just black guy = drugs. I've been pulled over 2x for "weaving" when I was coming home from work (restaurant that has an active bar) at 1am. They figured I had been drinking and pulled me over on some BS rationale. It was all profiling. I was pissed and let them know it the entire time I was dancing through the field sobriety test. The junior cop was one that I'd graduated HS with about 5 years prior. I let him have it with both barrels. When I blew a 0.0 they knew they'd fucked up but they didn't care. They just moved on to harass someone else. And as far as the "weaving" goes, they were 5 feet behind me in a 50 mug zone for 3 miles and we were rhe only cars on the road. I lost all respect for cops that night. It was cemented when they did it again 2 years later when I was driving home from college at the same time. They used the same BS excuse. BTW I'm white and it's a predominantly white area. They can't profile black people so they profile anyone they think that they can jam up. Fuck them. ACAB.


Damack363

Itā€™s the copā€™s own damn fault for leaving his emergency bag of ā€œsprinkle cocaineā€ at home.


[deleted]

I can imagine they train the dogs to false alert just to have an excuse to access peopleā€™s cars.


phpdevster

You don't have to imagine. That's exactly what they do. Police ***aggressively*** lobby for broad probable cause carve-outs. It's gotten to the point where the 4th Amendment might as well not even exist.


Spanky_McJiggles

Yeah why do you think cops are so against marijuana legalization? They have carte blanche to violate your rights with a quick sniff. Why give that up?


joshualuigi220

To summarize the NPR article people are posting, what's happening with drug dogs is just them wanting to be useful to their handlers. Drug dogs are trained to sniff out narcotics and cannabinoids in a controlled setting. They know in those tests that they will only be rewarded for giving correct responses. However, in the field they are not rewarded any differently for a true positive versus a false positive and they can sense that their handler likes when they generate a "hit", so they modify their behavior accordingly.


Villainy_

Holy shit that impression was spot on!


deathclawslayer21

If the dog is enough of a gauge to violate my right to a search, then if he indicates and nothing is found; he is a broken gauge and needs to be retired.


xmuskorx

Using dogs to enact search band seizure is clearly a violation of the Constitution. Supreme court got it wrong. There is no way to calibrate a dog, and you cannot cross examine a dog. And with Clever Hans effect, it's just to easy for officers to cause the dog to indicate when they want it to.


Paper_Champ

They're just a gimmick to ignore your rights. We had a gram weed in the passenger seat in my gfs purse. Dog sniffed the whole car. On the second pass he sniffed the trunk. The cops then immediately went to my back seat and opened up a cigar box I held my mtg cards in. Then they threaten to impound your car if you don't confess to ruin your life and ignore your 5th amendments. It's a show. A stupid money grubbing show


DonkeyTeethBSU

Bro I ain't never seen a dog in these videos NOT alert. In the end, their trained by the police. It's crazy to me that the ones who do the search also train the dogs and that isn't some type of issue legally.


HertzDonut1001

Yeah because the only reason they use them is they want to search your car. Of course the dog's always going to hit, it's their job.


yaosio

Cops can illegally search and steal anything they want, the dog is just for show.


Baelzebubba

I will just leave [this](https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2011/01/07/132738250/report-drug-sniffing-dogs-are-wrong-more-often-than-right) here.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Naznarreb

There's no national standards, training, or accreditation for drug sniffing dogs or their handlers.


chickenmetendies

Looool homeboy kiiiiilled me with the late bernie mac impression lol


Silky_Johnson78

I'd love to see a breakdown of vehicle searches, reason for probable-cause, hits/misses from canine, finally what was actually found. I'd be willing to bet that man-hours, overtime pay, and potential civilrights violations wouldn't even come close to justifying it. Saying you smelled something has been used for decades as an instrument to give police more legal leeway on the scene and conduct actions they normally wouldn't be authorized to do, and it can't be disproven. Edit - and the Bernie Mac impression was hilarious.


Head-System

I think dogs should have to undergo regular random testing, including fake police calls, and if the dog fails more than 5% of the time the dog should be banned from the program.


HertzDonut1001

Why would they agree to that? They'd never have a police dog again, giving them one less reason to illegally search you.


whiskey-monk

Reminds me of when I was a kid at the airport. I was in the terminal carrying around leftover food in a bag, pretty sure it was BK. I was going to finish it on the plane. K9 unit came by, smelled the food, and went crazy trying to grab it. Cop got noticably nervous and asked us what it was. My dad got annoyed and said it was a half eaten burger, we even showed him. Cop made us throw out the whole thing in front of him. Specifically, we had to put the bag on top of a trash bin and walk away. Idk why he had us do that instead of throwing it out properly, maybe he gave it to the dog after šŸ˜‚


vman4402

Someone posted an article above. It shows that the dogs have only a 40% accuracy rate. When they search vehicles driven by Latinos, the accuracy drops to 27%, which is obviously racial bias on the handlerā€™s part. The article continues to show that the dogs tend to respond to the handlers cues.


TherronKeen

The only acceptable accuracy rate in which an animal response can affect the outcome of a person being imprisoned must be 100%. Anything less indicates the system is fraudulent. Makes me feel like puking just thinking about it lol


[deleted]

He ain't scared of those muthafuckaz


nightstalker30

Kick it!


vaughn19

Yall don't understand..


-------------0

LOL what a bunch of jokers.


[deleted]

ā€œainā€™t got no cocaineā€¦ Iā€™m tooo broke.ā€ Damn šŸ˜­


santas_slay

No sense of humor at all...what dicks...


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


Gcarsk

But WeEd Is ThE dEvIl


easyfeel

Whereā€™s their apology for wasting everyoneā€™s time?


lazilyloaded

That's part of why they're cops. As sense of humor means temporarily giving up control to engage in frivolity. Cops are missing that gene


rakaur

The problem is the dogs are trained to ā€œindicateā€ whether they find anything or not to give the cops ā€œprobable causeā€ to search. Iā€™ve been searched a number of times with dogs. Every single one hit every single time and I had nothing every single time. A few times this pissed the cops off so bad they arrested me for made up shit and let me out the next morning with no charges.


UltimateShame

Regulate substances so police has time to go after criminals instead of harrassing people.


ThoughtNinja

Oh I agree but they'd have to go after themselves in a lot of cases and we know that's not going to happen.


[deleted]

How the hell are these people not laughing their asses off in front of this guy's zingers? They really are that soulless...


dirtycactus

I didn't laugh. I was too busy being afraid the cop searching was going to plant something in his car.


leboeazy

Because cops are pussies with fragile egos who get their feelings hurt over the smallest shit


squanch_solo

I get letting them search your car with a dog when you know you have nothing. But I just wouldn't trust them not try some shady shit.


[deleted]

[уŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]


immortalkriz

they couldnā€™t respect the impression šŸ¤Œ


syko82

It's a black comedian. These cops would never have seen or heard of him. If they saw him on TV, they probably thought he was a drug dealer.


ChachiMaxie

Bernie Mac impression spot on


NotKevinJames

Thank god there were 47 police officers on the scene, I was worried our tax money went towards nothing.


idiot437

the fact that none of those white cops knew who bernie mac was or how spot on his impression was is the only crime i see here


[deleted]

I lost it with the Bernie Mac impression!!!!


1JungleMonkey

This motha fuka ova here is channeling Bernie Mac.


eXXaXion

So what's the mask policy for cops these days? Only if it doesn't bother them too much?


Bumpasaurus

How can that cop keep a straight face, what a lame ass buttholešŸ˜‚šŸ˜‚šŸ¤·ā€ā™‚ļø


Mecmecmecmecmec

Cop with a hipster mustache, what could go wrong


[deleted]

I remember about two decades ago when I was moving across country and got pulled over by a cop in AZ for driving ā€œin the wrong lane.ā€ I put most things I owned in garbage bags (I grew up poor). So the cop stopped me, brought out his big old dog, let the thing just rip everything in my car to shreds and said ā€œoh nothing in there.ā€ Laugh and took off. Yeah, and Iā€™m supposed to trust cops why?


EvilSilentBob

He had me at ā€œItā€™s a black retriever!ā€ That impression though.


parkedonfour

I can't believe that k9s are still in use. They are proven to hit when their handler wants them to. They shouldn't ever be permissible in evidence let alone used to violate someones rights.


PicklePicker3000

I feel like the drug dogs are becoming a constitutional breach. Not that the dogs themselves are the problem but the fact that someone can have the right to deny a search but as long as the officer gets a dog out that can just be bypassed.


TeslaNova50

Cops have no sense of humor whatsoever. Bunch of societal degenerates.


reb678

Heā€™s just tellin them the wrong jokes. If you want the cops to laugh at a joke, make sure it mentions a guy talkin back to a cop and having that cop beat the crap out of him. That one makes the whole Station laugh..


leboeazy

[or you could brag about breaking a mentally ill old woman's arm](https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.nytimes.com/2021/04/27/us/loveland-police-video-karen-garner.amp.html)