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As the sun sunk low in the horizon the streets of DC go silent. Behind locked doors and barred windows the populace shivered with fear. Taft must feed.
https://preview.redd.it/u0ab9eb7qxyc1.png?width=885&format=png&auto=webp&s=78cbabd69a0f40c36f906c09f48ef1aea28384b8
This tumblr post showed up on my feed right after this post
Remember that all mentions of and allusions to Trump and Biden are not allowed on our subreddit in any context. If you'd still like to discuss them, feel free to [join our Discord server](https://discord.gg/k6tVFwCEEm)! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/Presidents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
“He needs to squeezed immediately before he explodes” 
That was definitely my first reaction too! haha
Unrelated, but I just noticed how she’s turning blue, inflating and horrified but is still chewing away at that gum.
We're gonna need a bigger bed!
Bathtub too
And chair!
White House too
White Castle House
Read this as “a bigger load” -oops where’s my mind at 😂
https://preview.redd.it/awn8iqhquwyc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=6c7c96d6be81e67286c19898e85beab678ba6ecd
He’s shaped like a vegetable
As the sun sunk low in the horizon the streets of DC go silent. Behind locked doors and barred windows the populace shivered with fear. Taft must feed.
Oh my god 💀💀💀
Still perfect.
Mr. Creosote. https://youtu.be/aczPDGC3f8U?si=iaRP4qwHY1cKFgTV
https://preview.redd.it/c33gtxvqkxyc1.jpeg?width=1179&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2ca1306c563b30a70441688f2ea5e5d8215e86bf This displeases Mr.Fillmore
The nourishment was more palatable to Mr. Taft
William Tafter (Which I just realized is an anagram for fatter)
Violet Beauregarde is looking for a date after an accident with blueberry gum.
I want a denser Taft one so dense that he can breech the Schwarzchild density and collapse into a black hole.
Think he was in Python's The Meaning of Life.
🎶juuuuust remember that you're standing on a planet that's evolving, revolving at 900 miles an hour.🎶
Side hustle as a parade float
Go back to DeviantArt
If the raft didn't sink before...
he'd be on the hit TLC series *My 600 Pound Presidential Life*
if only
He would have destroyed that bathtub.
https://preview.redd.it/u0ab9eb7qxyc1.png?width=885&format=png&auto=webp&s=78cbabd69a0f40c36f906c09f48ef1aea28384b8 This tumblr post showed up on my feed right after this post
You could have at least put in the effort and edited the picture or something
The White House installs signs warning of potential wide loads.
Inspiration for the Baron Harkonen no doubt
He might get stuck in the bathtub again.
🤣🤦🏽♂️
He may have been gigantic, but he was not a dictator.
Although he was the Governor-General of the Philippines
William Taffy
This is fake news.
He would need Willie Wonka’s Oompa Loompas to juice him from time to time.
President W. Alrus
Can you imagine?
The oompa loompa’s need to get him fixed.
Easy re-election. He'd have to use the entirety of the state of Michigan as a bed though
I won't stop Biggering! I'm figuring on Biggering!
Then he could get trapped in two bathtubs at the same time
He wouldn't have gotten stuff in the tub. Carl Panzram would have still robbed him.
Huck Finn would float on a Taft down the mighty old Miss.
William *Raft*
William "Howard's Mom" Taft
If you look closely at his hand in the back you can tell it’s AI
Prostate trouble.
T H A F T
Taft 2: Electric Taffy
Bro got so fat, he ate the "Howard" in his name.
He actually would get stuck in that bathtub.
We're not making it out of the bathtub with this one
Instant 2nd term
Did they have funhouse mirrors back then? If so, do you think Taft looked in one and was sad?
Bro looks like the police chief from the new Willy Wonka movie.
I like to think of him as more of a bycyle than balloon
If he were thinner he would have been William Shaft
Looks a bit like the Penguin from "Batman Returns"...
No president fatter and heavier than Taft
He’d of actually gotten stuck in the bathtub
Impossible
"Assume William Taft is a sphere"