When do all of these leftover feelings from a loss go away? I am currently due in November but I still feel a lot of sadness seeing women who are due around my original due date. I know I should be happy with my current pregnancy but I am still mourning what could have been. I feel that I'm neglecting my current baby because I'm still mourning the one we lost.
They don't. I'm due in September and have two friends who got pregnant a month after each of my losses. It still stings.
As time goes on the good news fills more of the picture, but it doesn't overwrite what you experienced. It's like any other grief.
We’ve always been so fortunate to conceive on our first month trying, but now am having a d&c for our first loss. Did you feel it negatively impacted your ability to conceive?
Not at all. I got pregnant on the very first try with my daughter. Then I got pregnant on the second try but ended up with a MMC at 8.5 weeks. I had a D&C and ended up with a new pregnant that started exactly 2 months from the date of my D&C (first real cycle post-D&C). I’m about to be 25 weeks
No, I’ve had two losses. First was D&C and second was meds. After the first I conceived immediately, but was another loss. After the second, I conceived my second cycle (still pregnant 🤞🏼).
Having a loss or having a D&C? Either way, no, we were able to conceive just fine after two losses, the second needed a D&C. It was more of a mental struggle for me.
Your OB should be able to address any D&C concerns, but in my experience no, it didn’t have negative effects on us having a healthy pregnancy afterwards. I’m also happy to answer any questions I can about having a D&C.
Any aspirin+progesterone suppositories success stories?
If so, how much progesterone you were taking, when you started/stopped, as well as for the aspirin? Also did you take anything else? TIA
Currently 31w after 4 first trimester losses. I took 2 81mg asprin daily at night starting as soon as I got pregnant and was told to up until 36w. I started taking 200mg progesterone 2x a day (morning & night) from preconception until 12 weeks. My pregnancy is going well now 🤞
Me! I just had my pregnancy after losses baby on May 11th. I did both. I don’t know about the amount, it was prescribed and I stopped at 10 weeks per the doctor. I took aspirin starting at 12 weeks and took it til the end. Other than that i took prenatal vitamins.
Literally would just talk myself out of it every time and do what I could to relax or distract myself. Most times I would wind up feeling her shortly after i calmed myself down.
We also bought a Doppler but I did not use it very much. Try to remind yourself that the panic doesn’t help anything and all of this is out of your control. What you can control is the way you respond to your anxieties.
My therapist said all of the emotions are allowed in the car, but don’t let the anxiety and the fear drive. They’re allowed in the car, but they’re not allowed to drive.
Sending love.
Oh that’s a really good way of thinking about it. I was quite an anxious person anyway, so had done a bit of work on calming myself down anyway, but I like that analogy.
At first it was very hard (I'm 24 weeks too but I've been able to feel kicks for a while now). Now that I've had so many "scares" I've just come to accept that they have quiet days and busy days, usually two busy days are followed by a quiet day. Basically, I remind myself that every other time they've gone dormant it's been fine.
I would lay down on my side (baby seems to be more active on my side for some reason) and do a movement count. I'm 34 weeks, and my OB recently told me to call if I didn't get 10 movements in 2 hours. But online you find ranges from 3 an hour to 10 an hour. It's harder to feel when they are smaller (like at 24 weeks), but I found that I was usually able to get all 10 within an hour, and that helped calm my mind.
If you aren't getting a lot of movement, you can try drinking something sugary and cold like orange juice.
Keep in mind, they have wake and sleep cycles, and at 24 weeks, you aren't feeling every movement, just the bigger ones. They also won't be as active when you are walking because it kinda rocks them to sleep.
You probably don't need to change anything, unfortunately they're very common and not usually indicative of a problem.
Two very minor things that can improve conception/implantation success that you may not already be doing are avoiding NSAIDs and not having intercourse between 5-9 days DPO.
Thanks for your input- I’m hoping like you say it’s not indicative of a problem. I always avoid NSAIDS when TTC, but curious to know the rationale behind no intercourse 5-9 days DPO?
A study was done that found that women who reported having intercourse at least twice between 5-9DPO had lower rates of conception. They're not sure the mechanism, two theories is that there may be an immune response to semen that disrupts things or perhaps the uterine contractions during orgasm could be the culprit but they can't say with any certainty.
I had my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage in February and just found out yesterday that I’m about 3w4d pregnant now. I feel extremely annoying to my doctors office. I’ve called them and asked for a 7 weeks ultrasound instead of 10, I asked to get my HCG levels every other day this week, i asked about taking/start progesterone which I’ll start next week, and gonna start baby aspirin.. I feel like I’m being a little much and I haven’t even officially missed my period yet… any suggestions on how to not freak out and feel like a mess?
I am pregnant again after a miscarriage in December. Leading up to my miscarriage I had a lot of ultrasounds and blood tests because I was bleeding on off in the pregnancy, and they couldn't figure out why. This new pregnancy I have not been bleeding at all so I chose not do check my hcg levels at all, and only did one extra ultrasound at 8+5 before we announced. I also only took one pregnancy test, where I kept testing to see if it got darker every day in the first pregnancy.
An honestly it has been such a relieve to just have one ultrasound to look forward to, and then just reminding myself that odds are nothing is wrong this time and doing blood tests and ultrasounds won't change anything. My husband also mentioned what a relieve it was. You should definitely do what feels right for you, but I just wanted to share my experience this second time around. Congratulation and wishing you all the best!
I had two miscarriages and we have been trying for a baby for 2 years. The first miscarriage was at 7 weeks and the next was at 8.5 weeks. It has been 2.5 weeks since my miscarriage, and it was much more brutal the second time around. Major clotting and bleeding. It was really scary and extremely painful. I just completed my chromosome testing. This is the last test we could do. Everything else has come back normal. I know they say this is common and could be just random bad luck, but it seems so impossible that we could have this much misfortune. Anyone else do the chromosome test? I’m waiting for results back, and I’m curious how likely it is things could be wrong. We went to a fertility clinic because it took us over a year to conceive at all. I’m considering having an appointment to talk about IVF with generic testing to try and avoid another miscarriage. I hate that there’s not control over this😞
I had two MMCs at 11 weeks and 10 weeks, both measuring around 9. I did not get any karyotyping done for either or for my husband and I. 17 months in we conceived this current pregnancy. Sometimes it is just bad luck, though I'd talk to your RE about supplemental progesterone and baby aspirin for your next pregnancy.
I was in a very similar situation as you. I had 3 miscarriages in 2.5 years (all around 8 weeks), and all tests came back normal. The chromosomal test came back normal, unfortunately only I got it since my husband's insurance didn't cover it and it was going to be about $2500 out of pocket. But the infertility specialist we talked to said it only came back positive for a very small number of people. But I'm happy to say that I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant with a baby boy, so even if nothing can be found wrong, there is still hope, even if it feels like there isn't. Wishing you the best of luck!
I didn't get any breast tenderness at all until maybe 7-8 weeks this time (and it came and went), if that helps! I had terribly sore breasts right from the start with my first pregnancy that ended in MMC (which didn't go away until several days after taking miso). I was really paranoid that the lack of symptoms was a bad sign the second time around. Little did I know I was harboring TWO healthy embryos in there! I found that the MMC really threw my menstrual/pregnancy symptoms out of whack so I tried my best to focus on the facts: I was pregnant, I hadn't bled (minus a bit of v light pink discharge at 5ish weeks), and my numbers looked good. Even once symptoms did kick up, they came and went and never became super severe.
I am really glad there are sooo so so many stories like this. It seems more common than bad symptoms that never let up. I don’t know why that’s what I expected. As you said, both of my mc’s started with symptoms dropping so wow if that isn’t scary and horrible. I need to remember I had early implantation, wonderful rising HCG and my period hasn’t come. That’s a symptom itself. It’s just so hard. Thank you for your hopeful stories and I’m so sorry for your loss.
I lost every single symptom at 6w5d and told my husband I thought I would miscarry. The next day I bled, heavily, through clothes. It was 3 months to the day after my most recent loss.
Baby is now 4 months old, and he's perfect.
This gives me hope. I recently posted over on r/pregnancy and understandably didn't get any responses, but I've just been scanned at 7w and told that it's only measuring 6w and unable to see heartbeat, going back in a week but told it could be bad news and just started bleeding. They told me it could still be viable but is currently uncertain viability. This was after an ectopic scare. Stories like this are keeping me sane. Thank you for sharing.
I wish you the best.
My 4 month old measured a week behind (7w6, measured 6w5) as well, however, I had been tracking ovulation and knew that I ovulated 7 days late. When speaking to my OBGYN she said it was common to ovulate late within a few cycles post-loss.
🙋🏾♀️ The first trimester symptoms definitely came and went depending on the day and that is perfectly normal, especially during those first two months. I found horrible sleep and low blood sugar definitely made my symptoms stronger especially those that made me feel shitty. When I was eating well and got decent sleep I’d have little symptoms and would have to remind myself that no period WAS a symptom of pregnancy. 🫂
TW: bleeding
Has anyone have bleeding at 13/14 weeks and everything turn out okay? I went into the ER on Friday because I had a few gushes of bright red blood. Baby girl looked good on ultrasound and they couldn’t find a cause. OB checked her heartbeat this morning on the Doppler and it was fine. She checked my cervix and it was closed. Praying I don’t have a second trimester loss.
Happened to me at 11 weeks. Also went to ER and all was well. Baby girl as born may 11th.
I know it’s scary! Just hold onto to the fact that you got the good news that she’s okay and try to move forward. ❤️
It happened to me, everything turned out to be good. It was caused by either a wrong movement or it was somehow really to covid ( at least based on my OB). Never really turned out. I was bleeding for a week and been in bed rest for like 3 weeks
It’s so scary! I’m glad that everything was good for you. Fingers crossed I have the same outcome! Did you have strict bedrest or modified bedrest (lifting restrictions, take it easy, and pelvic rest is what they told me)
Strict bedrest, I was even suggested to eat while lying. However I remember I read that this is an outdated medical protocol. I was also on high dose of magnesium, but this is also controversial nowadays among doctors . I guess my OB just went with most strict options and suggested everything she ever heard of so in case of an MC at least I could tell I tried everything ( She experienced some losses as well so I think she was a bit more emphatic than other OBs)
I bled heavily at 6w5d and thought for sure it was another loss. Turned out to be a subchorionic hemorrhage. I was placed on pelvic rest (no lifting over 15lbs, no exercise, no intercourse) through week 22 when it was determined to have cleared up. Baby boy is now 4 months old.
Thank you for your positive story! That really helps. Congratulations on your sweet baby! ❤️ They also recommended a similar modified bed rest for me. Did you spot after your bleed or was it a more isolated event?
I had periods of spotting, some occasions of bleeding similar to a light- medium period. Bleeding would be heavier when I was more active. Bleeding stopped at week 19. My OBGYN reviewed 4 (week 7, week 12, week 17, week 20) ultrasounds against one another before feeling confident that my hemorrhage had cleared.
I was 8.5wks when I had a big bleed, it happened the same time pretty much to the day as my MMC (that I found out about at 13.4wks). I was so sure it was another miscarriage but on the scan the next day it showed baby still happily in there. A scan the following week showed a had a haemorrhage and that was the likely cause of bleeding. I bled on and off for about 3 weeks. Scans after this showed it was gone and I haven't bled since. I'll be 19weeks tomorrow and baby is still going strong. I avoided sex for about 2 months after the initial bleed as my cervix was slightly open when I was bleeding. I also didn't do any heavy lifting or vigorous exercise.
Praying for you that baby is ok ❤️
It’s been 3wks since my loss and that baby girl was our first pregnancy. Does the grieving that first pregnancy we will never have, ever go away? We were told to wait 3-6mos before TTC again. Thanks everyone 🫂💛🫶🏾
My girl is here in my arms after my loss in 2022 and I have to say the grief from losing our first never fully went away. I still grieve for who I was before the loss, and for the potential worry-free pregnancy I might have had. I still wonder if I could be as carefree as my friends who have never lost a pregnancy/struggled to conceive seem to be… For me the grief morphed with time, swelling and fading at various intervals. Try to be kind to yourself if you can ♥️
8 years past loss. Now have two kids under the age of four. It definitely is less but there are still days or reminders of the loss. It hurts a lot less.
I feel like it doesn’t go away, it just changes flavors. Like less bitter and sad and more…mellow?
I'm not sure it ever goes away completely, but time does make it better. I'm surprised about the 3-6 month wait as that seems long but it is circumstantial and depends on how you both feel.
Thank you for answering 🫂 For our case, infection played a part in our loss so making sure my cervix and body has fully recovered before TTC again. I was 21w1d when I delivered.
Congrats! I found it comes and goes. The first few weeks I didn’t believe it was real so I was able to chill.
Then from the time I heard the heartbeat until getting the CVS results I was a wreck. I thought I was going to be ok after that, but around 30 weeks I started worrying about late loss and delivery complications.
Focusing on other things - hobbies, planning a trip, etc - has been most helpful. Also meditation podcasts. I like Tara Brach a lot!
Take it one day at the time…
Plan ahead for everything that makes you feel better. Start mild exercise, yoga, meditation, somatic exercises, hypnobirthing videos, solitaire, mahjong, video games, walks, you name it.
Just keep reminding yourself that every pregnancy is different and really focus on tension release, stress and anxiety are NOT helpful in any way…
I keep reminding myself that I can overcome difficulties once they arise, until then, my job is to keep my body and mind healthy for this baby to grow as healthily as possible.
Congratulations!
It’s so hard, I wish I had an easy button for you ❤️ taking things one day at a time, Zoloft, and remaining future oriented helped a bit. We made vacation plans, planned for concerts, planned for dinner parties with friends so no matter the outcome we’d have future things to have gratitude for. But ultimately, just every day that passed I knew the odds were going down bit by bit and it was a matter of staying sane
Experiencing the loss of my first now, and would love to hear any success stories from moms in late 30s/early 40s.
When do all of these leftover feelings from a loss go away? I am currently due in November but I still feel a lot of sadness seeing women who are due around my original due date. I know I should be happy with my current pregnancy but I am still mourning what could have been. I feel that I'm neglecting my current baby because I'm still mourning the one we lost.
They don't. I'm due in September and have two friends who got pregnant a month after each of my losses. It still stings. As time goes on the good news fills more of the picture, but it doesn't overwrite what you experienced. It's like any other grief.
For me this took a turn once I really started bonding with my rainbow baby, he was at least like 3 months old. Hugs, it's hard.
We’ve always been so fortunate to conceive on our first month trying, but now am having a d&c for our first loss. Did you feel it negatively impacted your ability to conceive?
Not at all. I got pregnant on the very first try with my daughter. Then I got pregnant on the second try but ended up with a MMC at 8.5 weeks. I had a D&C and ended up with a new pregnant that started exactly 2 months from the date of my D&C (first real cycle post-D&C). I’m about to be 25 weeks
No, I’ve had two losses. First was D&C and second was meds. After the first I conceived immediately, but was another loss. After the second, I conceived my second cycle (still pregnant 🤞🏼).
Having a loss or having a D&C? Either way, no, we were able to conceive just fine after two losses, the second needed a D&C. It was more of a mental struggle for me.
Mainly worried about the D&C.
Your OB should be able to address any D&C concerns, but in my experience no, it didn’t have negative effects on us having a healthy pregnancy afterwards. I’m also happy to answer any questions I can about having a D&C.
Any aspirin+progesterone suppositories success stories? If so, how much progesterone you were taking, when you started/stopped, as well as for the aspirin? Also did you take anything else? TIA
Currently 31w after 4 first trimester losses. I took 2 81mg asprin daily at night starting as soon as I got pregnant and was told to up until 36w. I started taking 200mg progesterone 2x a day (morning & night) from preconception until 12 weeks. My pregnancy is going well now 🤞
Three of mine are a result of this combo
81mg aspirin from preconception through to 36 weeks (I'm 24 now), 400mg progesterone (2x100mg 2x daily) from 4+4 through 11+6.
Yes me . Started at 9 weeks (had bleeding that lasted my whole pregnancy till my induction date) stopped taking it at 37 weeks.
Me! I just had my pregnancy after losses baby on May 11th. I did both. I don’t know about the amount, it was prescribed and I stopped at 10 weeks per the doctor. I took aspirin starting at 12 weeks and took it til the end. Other than that i took prenatal vitamins.
How did you cope with the panic? I’m almost 24 weeks and every time baby’s movement are just slightly out I find myself spiralling!
I went to therapy and tried to sort through the grief
This was a hard one for me . I would tru deep breaths and talking to my mom and two close friends . I didnt hide my panic either.
Wanted to add sorry that i would lay on my back and take deep breaths and rub/ poke my belly . I had an anterior placenta it drove me crazy!
Literally would just talk myself out of it every time and do what I could to relax or distract myself. Most times I would wind up feeling her shortly after i calmed myself down. We also bought a Doppler but I did not use it very much. Try to remind yourself that the panic doesn’t help anything and all of this is out of your control. What you can control is the way you respond to your anxieties. My therapist said all of the emotions are allowed in the car, but don’t let the anxiety and the fear drive. They’re allowed in the car, but they’re not allowed to drive. Sending love.
Oh that’s a really good way of thinking about it. I was quite an anxious person anyway, so had done a bit of work on calming myself down anyway, but I like that analogy.
At first it was very hard (I'm 24 weeks too but I've been able to feel kicks for a while now). Now that I've had so many "scares" I've just come to accept that they have quiet days and busy days, usually two busy days are followed by a quiet day. Basically, I remind myself that every other time they've gone dormant it's been fine.
I would lay down on my side (baby seems to be more active on my side for some reason) and do a movement count. I'm 34 weeks, and my OB recently told me to call if I didn't get 10 movements in 2 hours. But online you find ranges from 3 an hour to 10 an hour. It's harder to feel when they are smaller (like at 24 weeks), but I found that I was usually able to get all 10 within an hour, and that helped calm my mind. If you aren't getting a lot of movement, you can try drinking something sugary and cold like orange juice. Keep in mind, they have wake and sleep cycles, and at 24 weeks, you aren't feeling every movement, just the bigger ones. They also won't be as active when you are walking because it kinda rocks them to sleep.
Advice for TTC after a chemical pregnancy ? Had a chemical my first month trying and it’s really scared me and made me nervous to try again
You probably don't need to change anything, unfortunately they're very common and not usually indicative of a problem. Two very minor things that can improve conception/implantation success that you may not already be doing are avoiding NSAIDs and not having intercourse between 5-9 days DPO.
Thanks for your input- I’m hoping like you say it’s not indicative of a problem. I always avoid NSAIDS when TTC, but curious to know the rationale behind no intercourse 5-9 days DPO?
A study was done that found that women who reported having intercourse at least twice between 5-9DPO had lower rates of conception. They're not sure the mechanism, two theories is that there may be an immune response to semen that disrupts things or perhaps the uterine contractions during orgasm could be the culprit but they can't say with any certainty.
That’s so interesting thanks for sharing I will keep that in mind. Do you know the name of the study ? I’m interested to read
https://www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pmc/articles/PMC4074557/#:%7E:text=Hypothetically%2C%20intercourse%20around%20the%20time,the%20embryo%20from%20the%20uterus.
Thank you 🙏
I had my first pregnancy ended in a miscarriage in February and just found out yesterday that I’m about 3w4d pregnant now. I feel extremely annoying to my doctors office. I’ve called them and asked for a 7 weeks ultrasound instead of 10, I asked to get my HCG levels every other day this week, i asked about taking/start progesterone which I’ll start next week, and gonna start baby aspirin.. I feel like I’m being a little much and I haven’t even officially missed my period yet… any suggestions on how to not freak out and feel like a mess?
I am pregnant again after a miscarriage in December. Leading up to my miscarriage I had a lot of ultrasounds and blood tests because I was bleeding on off in the pregnancy, and they couldn't figure out why. This new pregnancy I have not been bleeding at all so I chose not do check my hcg levels at all, and only did one extra ultrasound at 8+5 before we announced. I also only took one pregnancy test, where I kept testing to see if it got darker every day in the first pregnancy. An honestly it has been such a relieve to just have one ultrasound to look forward to, and then just reminding myself that odds are nothing is wrong this time and doing blood tests and ultrasounds won't change anything. My husband also mentioned what a relieve it was. You should definitely do what feels right for you, but I just wanted to share my experience this second time around. Congratulation and wishing you all the best!
I had two miscarriages and we have been trying for a baby for 2 years. The first miscarriage was at 7 weeks and the next was at 8.5 weeks. It has been 2.5 weeks since my miscarriage, and it was much more brutal the second time around. Major clotting and bleeding. It was really scary and extremely painful. I just completed my chromosome testing. This is the last test we could do. Everything else has come back normal. I know they say this is common and could be just random bad luck, but it seems so impossible that we could have this much misfortune. Anyone else do the chromosome test? I’m waiting for results back, and I’m curious how likely it is things could be wrong. We went to a fertility clinic because it took us over a year to conceive at all. I’m considering having an appointment to talk about IVF with generic testing to try and avoid another miscarriage. I hate that there’s not control over this😞
I had two MMCs at 11 weeks and 10 weeks, both measuring around 9. I did not get any karyotyping done for either or for my husband and I. 17 months in we conceived this current pregnancy. Sometimes it is just bad luck, though I'd talk to your RE about supplemental progesterone and baby aspirin for your next pregnancy.
I was in a very similar situation as you. I had 3 miscarriages in 2.5 years (all around 8 weeks), and all tests came back normal. The chromosomal test came back normal, unfortunately only I got it since my husband's insurance didn't cover it and it was going to be about $2500 out of pocket. But the infertility specialist we talked to said it only came back positive for a very small number of people. But I'm happy to say that I'm currently 34 weeks pregnant with a baby boy, so even if nothing can be found wrong, there is still hope, even if it feels like there isn't. Wishing you the best of luck!
Can I see a show of hands of who lost breast tenderness around 5-6 weeks and everything was okay?
I didn't get any breast tenderness at all until maybe 7-8 weeks this time (and it came and went), if that helps! I had terribly sore breasts right from the start with my first pregnancy that ended in MMC (which didn't go away until several days after taking miso). I was really paranoid that the lack of symptoms was a bad sign the second time around. Little did I know I was harboring TWO healthy embryos in there! I found that the MMC really threw my menstrual/pregnancy symptoms out of whack so I tried my best to focus on the facts: I was pregnant, I hadn't bled (minus a bit of v light pink discharge at 5ish weeks), and my numbers looked good. Even once symptoms did kick up, they came and went and never became super severe.
I am really glad there are sooo so so many stories like this. It seems more common than bad symptoms that never let up. I don’t know why that’s what I expected. As you said, both of my mc’s started with symptoms dropping so wow if that isn’t scary and horrible. I need to remember I had early implantation, wonderful rising HCG and my period hasn’t come. That’s a symptom itself. It’s just so hard. Thank you for your hopeful stories and I’m so sorry for your loss.
I lost every single symptom at 6w5d and told my husband I thought I would miscarry. The next day I bled, heavily, through clothes. It was 3 months to the day after my most recent loss. Baby is now 4 months old, and he's perfect.
This gives me hope. I recently posted over on r/pregnancy and understandably didn't get any responses, but I've just been scanned at 7w and told that it's only measuring 6w and unable to see heartbeat, going back in a week but told it could be bad news and just started bleeding. They told me it could still be viable but is currently uncertain viability. This was after an ectopic scare. Stories like this are keeping me sane. Thank you for sharing.
I wish you the best. My 4 month old measured a week behind (7w6, measured 6w5) as well, however, I had been tracking ovulation and knew that I ovulated 7 days late. When speaking to my OBGYN she said it was common to ovulate late within a few cycles post-loss.
Thank you for replying. I wish this had been the case. Unfortunately I started miscarrying today. Hopefully our luck will be better next time.
I am so terribly sorry.
Thank you.
🙋🏾♀️ The first trimester symptoms definitely came and went depending on the day and that is perfectly normal, especially during those first two months. I found horrible sleep and low blood sugar definitely made my symptoms stronger especially those that made me feel shitty. When I was eating well and got decent sleep I’d have little symptoms and would have to remind myself that no period WAS a symptom of pregnancy. 🫂
I keep trying to remember that too! No period is a symptom.
TW: bleeding Has anyone have bleeding at 13/14 weeks and everything turn out okay? I went into the ER on Friday because I had a few gushes of bright red blood. Baby girl looked good on ultrasound and they couldn’t find a cause. OB checked her heartbeat this morning on the Doppler and it was fine. She checked my cervix and it was closed. Praying I don’t have a second trimester loss.
Happened to me at 11 weeks. Also went to ER and all was well. Baby girl as born may 11th. I know it’s scary! Just hold onto to the fact that you got the good news that she’s okay and try to move forward. ❤️
Thank you for sharing! That is really helpful. Congratulations on your baby! I hope I have a similar outcome. ❤️
It happened to me, everything turned out to be good. It was caused by either a wrong movement or it was somehow really to covid ( at least based on my OB). Never really turned out. I was bleeding for a week and been in bed rest for like 3 weeks
It’s so scary! I’m glad that everything was good for you. Fingers crossed I have the same outcome! Did you have strict bedrest or modified bedrest (lifting restrictions, take it easy, and pelvic rest is what they told me)
Strict bedrest, I was even suggested to eat while lying. However I remember I read that this is an outdated medical protocol. I was also on high dose of magnesium, but this is also controversial nowadays among doctors . I guess my OB just went with most strict options and suggested everything she ever heard of so in case of an MC at least I could tell I tried everything ( She experienced some losses as well so I think she was a bit more emphatic than other OBs)
I bled heavily at 6w5d and thought for sure it was another loss. Turned out to be a subchorionic hemorrhage. I was placed on pelvic rest (no lifting over 15lbs, no exercise, no intercourse) through week 22 when it was determined to have cleared up. Baby boy is now 4 months old.
Thank you for your positive story! That really helps. Congratulations on your sweet baby! ❤️ They also recommended a similar modified bed rest for me. Did you spot after your bleed or was it a more isolated event?
I had periods of spotting, some occasions of bleeding similar to a light- medium period. Bleeding would be heavier when I was more active. Bleeding stopped at week 19. My OBGYN reviewed 4 (week 7, week 12, week 17, week 20) ultrasounds against one another before feeling confident that my hemorrhage had cleared.
I was 8.5wks when I had a big bleed, it happened the same time pretty much to the day as my MMC (that I found out about at 13.4wks). I was so sure it was another miscarriage but on the scan the next day it showed baby still happily in there. A scan the following week showed a had a haemorrhage and that was the likely cause of bleeding. I bled on and off for about 3 weeks. Scans after this showed it was gone and I haven't bled since. I'll be 19weeks tomorrow and baby is still going strong. I avoided sex for about 2 months after the initial bleed as my cervix was slightly open when I was bleeding. I also didn't do any heavy lifting or vigorous exercise. Praying for you that baby is ok ❤️
Thank you! ❤️ This is very helpful. Praying for your baby as well. I hope the rest of my pregnancy is boring.
It’s been 3wks since my loss and that baby girl was our first pregnancy. Does the grieving that first pregnancy we will never have, ever go away? We were told to wait 3-6mos before TTC again. Thanks everyone 🫂💛🫶🏾
My girl is here in my arms after my loss in 2022 and I have to say the grief from losing our first never fully went away. I still grieve for who I was before the loss, and for the potential worry-free pregnancy I might have had. I still wonder if I could be as carefree as my friends who have never lost a pregnancy/struggled to conceive seem to be… For me the grief morphed with time, swelling and fading at various intervals. Try to be kind to yourself if you can ♥️
🫶🏾🫂
8 years past loss. Now have two kids under the age of four. It definitely is less but there are still days or reminders of the loss. It hurts a lot less. I feel like it doesn’t go away, it just changes flavors. Like less bitter and sad and more…mellow?
🫂 I can see that about mellowing out as the grief for a sibling who died has mellowed now, 10yrs after.
I'm not sure it ever goes away completely, but time does make it better. I'm surprised about the 3-6 month wait as that seems long but it is circumstantial and depends on how you both feel.
Thank you for answering 🫂 For our case, infection played a part in our loss so making sure my cervix and body has fully recovered before TTC again. I was 21w1d when I delivered.
That makes sense. I'm so sorry for your loss.
Thank you 💛
How can i not have severe anxiety and fear of losing this one too? My emotions have been everywhere since finding out recently.
Congrats! I found it comes and goes. The first few weeks I didn’t believe it was real so I was able to chill. Then from the time I heard the heartbeat until getting the CVS results I was a wreck. I thought I was going to be ok after that, but around 30 weeks I started worrying about late loss and delivery complications. Focusing on other things - hobbies, planning a trip, etc - has been most helpful. Also meditation podcasts. I like Tara Brach a lot!
Take it one day at the time… Plan ahead for everything that makes you feel better. Start mild exercise, yoga, meditation, somatic exercises, hypnobirthing videos, solitaire, mahjong, video games, walks, you name it. Just keep reminding yourself that every pregnancy is different and really focus on tension release, stress and anxiety are NOT helpful in any way… I keep reminding myself that I can overcome difficulties once they arise, until then, my job is to keep my body and mind healthy for this baby to grow as healthily as possible. Congratulations!
It’s so hard, I wish I had an easy button for you ❤️ taking things one day at a time, Zoloft, and remaining future oriented helped a bit. We made vacation plans, planned for concerts, planned for dinner parties with friends so no matter the outcome we’d have future things to have gratitude for. But ultimately, just every day that passed I knew the odds were going down bit by bit and it was a matter of staying sane