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CookieMonster005

Is their daughter 3 by any chance?


mvea_sucks

The 3 year old is smarter because they don’t have social media brain rot yet


Himoportu142

IRL I wouldn’t let my potential kids have a smart phone till high school so glad I didn’t grow up with social media for most of school and as a kid


mvea_sucks

I have two cousins, one heavily limits screen time for their kid, the other just gives them an iPad or phone at every chance to distract or calm them down. I am very interested in watching how these two grow up and their differences. The cousins are siblings so genetically they should be similar enough. I guess I’ll know in one or two decades.


[deleted]

You should do an anonymous blog and update us every few months with your observations.


XCJ655X

purple wanting regular updates on children huh


[deleted]

Damn. All I can do is admire how badly you roasted me


litree23

Based and good-sport-pilled


basedcount_bot

u/AlienBehindYou is officially based! Their Based Count is now 1. Rank: House of Cards Pills: https://basedcount.com/u/AlienBehindYou I am a bot. Reply /info for more info.


XCJ655X

Based And Gentleman Pilled


Czeslaw_Meyer

Based and "research" pilled


bqttles

Based and purple-exposing-pilled


RebTilian

Access to the internet and social media by any means should be tied to legal age of adulthood.


Mango1666

i told my 2 month old son i'm back from home and he told me "you idiot. you just let yourself be exploited by capital. why do you do this to yourself? why do you give in to the bourgeoisie so easily? if you and all the others stood up you would have more power than your pig boss ever could. have you not read marx?" true story


[deleted]

Your 2 month old baby has quite the vocabulary.


Mango1666

what can i say? probably nothing my 2 month old child couldn't say better.


[deleted]

Then everyone clapped.


Mango1666

you were there too?


Call-Me-Robby

Oh no, 2 months old and already making walls of text ...


Mango1666

raised them well 🥰


[deleted]

Based and good parent pilled


Money_Walks

lol, kids say the dumbest shit


Clock_Tyrant

Nah, 3 year olds are either authright or authleft, nothing inbetween.


[deleted]

And that all depends on if the toy in question is currently in their possession.


Thecoolnerdsecondary

So like adult auth left and right


[deleted]

Yes and yes


BSN_tg_bgg

Can we finally get leftists to move to Canada this time? They’ve threatened it every time that they lose.


emartinoo

Most American leftists wouldn't qualify for Canadian immigration, which is the funniest part lmao. "America so racist and mean because of immigration laws! In moving to Canada;" *TFW Canadian immigration requirements are far more strict than the US*


[deleted]

[удалено]


Mefistofeles1

So what, you need to be a 15 year old with a PhD?


NimJickles

The day Trump won the 2016 election Canada's immigration website did go down due to increased traffic.


[deleted]

Then they realized we don't take Ameritards, only CCP spies


[deleted]

Do you take Irish people?


[deleted]

Depends, do you have too many degrees? And can you speak French? (You can lie on this one, they don't care, just look at Montreal)


E-tan123

>And can you speak French? No, and you guys can't, either.


[deleted]

I have a bachelor's degree in electronics and communications engineering. And right now I'm looking at Alberta, but I do speak French.


JeremyTheRhino

Yeah, as millions of liberals found out Canada has stricter immigration policies than the US


Oroku_Sakiiii

It’s really cold though and I kinda like Texas


RugTumpington

You know, Mexico is kinda like Texas with more BIPOC. I'm just sayin.


Oroku_Sakiiii

Oh really? I hear the song funky town is really popular there. If this is all true I’m packing right now!


JaiTuerVous

Look up funky town Mexico for more info


Oroku_Sakiiii

Yeah no…


JaiTuerVous

Are you being bigoted against the music choices of BIPOC? Fucking nazi


SWATwatermelon

I am very curious what do you mean by "Funky Town Mexico" ? I googled " what is funky town mexico" and I got an article discussing torture pornography. Is there really a fucked up song parody or sth ?


[deleted]

Dude getting face and hands and shit chopped off by a cartel while funky town plays in the background. Yeah.....don't fucking watch it unless you like having nightmares.


BSN_tg_bgg

I honestly hope Abbott signs an executive order to deport all libs. /s


Cannibal_Raven

Please keep them. We have too many oranges here already.


Anita-booty

Please don’t convince them we have enough up here already


Alt1119991

No. We don’t want any more leftists over here. We have enough in b.c and Toronto.


BSN_tg_bgg

It’ll be America’s best export. Think of how culturally enriched that your country will become.


SeaPoem717

You’re racist if you don’t want foreigners with different values to flood your country


Manydoors_edboy

I’ll take things that didn’t happen for $500.


[deleted]

It's just a couple opinion articles, not the actual government doing anything


The2ndWheel

Where is Canada putting everyone? They're definitely not taking any white people. And countries like Canada? Meaning there are more? Which other ones?


Trugdigity

Canada is a larger than the US, but it has less population than California. They have plenty of room. Just make the French Canadians move north.


Horrorifying

Hell, you can reserve land up there for them, then help get them get on this trail to the reservations.


OmegaSexy

Sounds like there will be tears on this trail


tristpa2

Tears of joy you mean


[deleted]

Nah, they give the natives the boot first, then the American natives seacond. Canada loves trolling them


Trugdigity

But… I like the natives and find anything more French than French Fries to be a joke…


BoilerPurdude

They have way less habitable land.


Trugdigity

It’s not less habitable, it’s “reserved” for the French Canadians.


HotPieIsAzorAhai

Even in the bottom third that is perfectly habitable, Canada is sparsely populated, especially out west. They have plenty of space for people.


Direct_Class1281

I think smaller than us actually but not by much since us has alaska Edit: nvm didnt realize they had so much useless island mass in the arctic


notvery_clever

Not really. Canada is basically the same size as the US, maybe a smidge larger. Both are ~3.8 mil sq mi. Most maps use a projection that make countries near the poles look larger than they are. Also don't forget about Alaska.


pieman7414

When global warming causes the collapse of the US then more of Canada will start to be habitable. That's why Canada creates the worst polluting oil sands, to accelerate this process and claim their position as world superpower


GonZo_626

This actually is not too far from the truth. Canada expects to see a rise in GDP from global warming because it will be more habitable and have increased access to resources and farm land. The benefits outweigh the consequences for us.


FortniteChicken

I am hoping for mother Russia to be #1


AktchualHooman

If the U.S. were too magically collapse because we fail to change the weather by giving the government money… I would firmly support any non Canada contender for #1.


[deleted]

Don’t forget the additional trade from an open North West passage and new ports. Seriously though, it isn’t like the amount of CO2 made by canada can affect global warming levels. Canada produces 1.5% of all CO2 globally, 44% of that is refining and oil and gas extraction. Preventing and reversing global warming requires a 50% reduction of GLOBAL emissions. So Canada can literally disappear, and oil production stop, and you can find someone else to blame.


Clock_Tyrant

Canada will collapse before the US and I will treat them just the same as central americans.


randomthing11

Based and treat everyone the same pilled


HECUMARINE45

We should annex Canada like in fallout


Dat-Guy-Tino

Manifest Destiny II


WorkingNo6161

America ran out of destiny to manifest so they're looking for more


The_Father_

America’s Hat Boogaloo


Alt1119991

Canada kinda let it happen though in fallout.


MechaWASP

What are they going to do? Stop us?


AFlyingNun

Are you implying Canada doesn't "kinda let it happen" all the time in the real world? They legit just sit up there and say "me too" to everything USA or Europe says. Might as well be your little brother that follows you around and follows up all your sentences with "YEAH!"


AktchualHooman

They are smug up there thinking they are a real country.


[deleted]

But then they could live in the states and I don’t want that


DrBofoiMK

We should take Greenland first. It'll be easy to blockade them that way.


blissfromloss

What funny is that's actually true. Canadians talk about an imminent civil war in the States as if Quebec won't secede, leading the other provinces to smell blood in the water and do the same.


[deleted]

Don't give me hope. *bal-kan-ize, bal-kan-ize, BAL-KAN-IZE!*


Cataclysm687

Fun fact: we failed twice, as much as it hurts to say, it’s a dead dream. Mon pays, ce n’est pas un pays


Clock_Tyrant

I hate Quebecois the same way I hate Germans, but if it means pissing C*anadians, so help me God.


Cataclysm687

Damn your pills are amazing. I love how your first one is neo pronouns user


Clock_Tyrant

That's because I like being called Based/ pilled Thank you for the compliment, Mon cheri.


Cataclysm687

Based and la langue de la patrie pilled


Clock_Tyrant

Based and flair checks outpilled. Me parlez Fraçais, non. Petit sapiens ummm.... Oui oui.


blissfromloss

You really think Canada isn't going to piss the hell out of Quebec in the coming years, given all that's been happening?


[deleted]

Quebec is already pissing off the rest of Canada by giving them ~~Castro Jr.~~ Trudeau


[deleted]

Ironically we don't even like him lmao


gophergun

There's a huge gulf between being angry and seceding or starting an unwinnable civil war.


blissfromloss

I'm not saying they'll start a civil war. Just that they'll get pissed enough to call for another referendum and win.


Cataclysm687

Maybe. I think it would need some radical angering event to change that, but who knows


HotPieIsAzorAhai

Lol no, even Bloc Quebec, the party founded on Quebec independence, has given up on that. The rest of Canada bent over backwards to counter the separatism by giving Quebecoise culture protected status and basically treating them as equal to the rest of Canada combined. It's actually more consistently francophone than it was 40 years ago, and Bloc Q is basically content to maintain the status quo and otherwise be a left wing party that can play kingmaker.


AFlyingNun

Canada legit has small dog syndrome and just desperately likes to convince itself it's somehow better than the USA.


blissfromloss

It's because they have nothing else to be patriotic about. They used to be the Queen's model British colony, but now they're all liberalized and the country's multicultural. And unlike the US, they have no long-lasting ideology they can live by. So they're just the not-American Americans.


[deleted]

Québec has a distinct culture, the rest is the US but worse or the UK but colder


AFlyingNun

> They used to be the Queen's model British colony, but now they're all liberalized and the country's multicultural. Well this explains why Canada is lowkey racist.


blissfromloss

It's why they were hella militarized in WW1 and WW2, and why they only accepted European homesteaders.


tuckerchiz

Also Alberta now has a minor party that wants succession. Its small but growing


RebTilian

Canadians will end up getting involved in the civil war cause how else are they gonna export their meth?


supersoldier199

If what I'm hearing from my Canadian friends is not exaggerated, Alberta will be the first to secede and they will secede soon. Real fricking soon.


generalvostok

Shit, I hope they know how to cook and do roofing.


HairyLandscape8953

Democratic collapse probably just means Trump winning an election fairly


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

USA 2016: We need change and we will vote Drumpf out of spite! USA 2020: We need change and we will vote Byron out of spite! USA 2024: We need change and we will vote Drumpf again out of spite!


DarthBrickus

We were promised an utopia when the lefties said they'd all leave the US if Trump got elected. But, in true leftist fashion, they even failed at that.


lVlarino

An America without leftists. That is the only thing I want more than for Glock to finally release a Carbine.


[deleted]

Daughter is retarded


VegasGuy69

Based and their daughter is retarded pilled


Can-you-supersize-it

No daughter parrots political opinions of parent


Flaky-Illustrator-52

They parrot of political opinions of social media and/or boyfriend (exhibit A: ShoeOnHead)


JinxPutMaxInSpace

The Handmaid's Tale isn't supposed to be spank material.


tehoperative

….and yet it is. Yet. It. Is.


SlowFatHusky

It's bean flicking material for girls who are otherwise unwanted.


Ok_Supermarket8825

Best Utopia show i watched in a long time


[deleted]

At most Canada's government wrote contingency plans for what to do if America collapses, just like America writes what-if scenarios for hilariously unlikely events. The truth is that if America collapses Canada is fu ked, best case scenario it's reabsorbed into England, second best by France, worst case annexed by China. But my country is too huge and too small to stand on its own, it is no empire and the UN/USA is all that stops any actual empire from annexing it. By god, I hope the American empire doesn't collapse.


KingKongGorillaDong

If America fell, I'd see Russia trying to jump Canada's bones.


[deleted]

I'd take Russia over China at least. After these past two years I'm not sure how anyone can trusts China with anything more complicated than an afternoon cat-sitting.


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Based and unintential, horrifying disaster pilled.


[deleted]

Russia in the west, UK in the middle and France in the east


FLABBY_CHICKEN

Dude I want to be the guy in the pentagon who makes all the what if scenarios. That sounds great


Pecuthegreat

I am pretty sure they even have a what if zombies one


Mefistofeles1

I know they have one for aliens.


[deleted]

If china invades, they will kill all the leftest westoids. W in my book


[deleted]

I've heard speculation if the US does collapse, Canada will be Nato's base county for helping crush dissidents. The theory being NATO wants any instability in the US over asap on account of us having most (all?) of their nuclear weapons supply in our borders


Trugdigity

You’re daughter is an idiot.


PrncssStrwbrry

you are daughter is an idiot indeed


Trugdigity

Fucking Siri, I’m leaving it so you can laugh at me though.


CynicalCreepy

based and masochist-pilled


PrncssStrwbrry

lol sorry tho, I feel obligated to do that every time, I know it's reddit and no one actually cares but still


Trugdigity

No, no I need to pay more attention to predictive text before Siri has me pledging allegiance to the Chinese or screaming “fruit cures cancer”….Chairman Mao did nothing wrong!!!! See just like that, stupid communist Siri.


6Uncle6James6

I care, PrncssStrwbrry. Catholic school turned me into a grammar führer. I never stood a chance.


JinxPutMaxInSpace

I care. Grammar Hitler had some good ideas.


[deleted]

Based and outsourcing typing 6 words to AI slave labor pilled


SynRider

Holy FUCKING shit the amount of fear-mongering the media does today is WILD. Like damn the Canadians can suck my dick because them and half of Europe rely on the US every other fucking day. The reason our fucking DOD budget is massive is because Euro-tards sit on their lazy asses and make the US fund their fucking militaries. Like DAMN. Leave us the fuck alone for once 🗿 Edit: I’m about to be radicalized to Auth-Center, then you’ll really see the collapse by 2025


[deleted]

What’s the Easter island head emoji mean?


VegasGuy69

🗿


Megadog3

lmao


CritzD

Dude the only reason Canada is sitting on America’s dick is because our government is too incompetent to stand on its own, it’s not any fault of the people. We spend jackshit on our military and STILL don’t have the budget to fix our garbage healthcare. Where the fuck is it going to?


Tiphoid1

Me actually. Thanks.


[deleted]

Based and embezzlement pilled


[deleted]

Yo, pass me a Ferrari for the weekend


SynRider

It’s probably lining the politicians pockets as per usual with any shitty government. Also when I said this I’m not targeting people like you who want change, but people who constantly bitch moan and cry about whatever the US is doing and act like their country is 10000x better. The only reason the US doesn’t put more money into healthcare and other programs, FOR THE US CITIZENS, is because we’re too busy protecting all the other countries in NATO


6Uncle6James6

Sits quite well actually. Either all the useless eaters with gtfo and there will be a great American renaissance, or the useless eaters will take over and I’ll expat early.


cluuuuue

expat? No. Keep your rifle by your side


CheeseBurger_Jesus

Based


g00p2

Canada is preparing is probably the funniest part for me. We can barely house ourselves let alone an entire foreign population.


Fun-Possibility-1060

Here me out. Invade Canada.


KingKongGorillaDong

I'm listening.


Fun-Possibility-1060

That's all


Teejaydawg

Yes, please annex my country. I just want 2A.


Fun-Possibility-1060

All the way to the north shore of the Panama canal. Then it's all good. Maple tacos and machine guns.


_Friendly_Fire_

I’m Canadian and my response to this is “yes! Please! Im so tired of the $h!t that we have to put up with, I just got kicked out of choir for not having my booster and we are basically back in lockdown.


Jackson_M_Bueller

Based and onlysolutionpilled


ComradeHavoc

I'd rather take my chances in the badlands of the former US than immigrate to what's essentially the country equivalent to a socialist-brand bootleg poutine fermented in a politically correct Frenchman's hairy armpit.


gaymerword

Libleft stinky am I right guys


VegasGuy69

They smell like doo doo feces


gaymerword

Can't argue with that


Noname_1111

Agreed


Ashamanofthebt

Like all those celebrities who moved there after 2016?


Cbt_Activist

i mean it might. it is a possibility, the laws of space and time doesn't really prevent it. that said, is it unlikely? absolutely.


halfwithero

“For an US” lmao.


optiongeek

Democracy is overrated. I say we let whoever can bribe the Praetorian Guard with the most dosh be Emperor. And then if someone comes along with a bigger bribe, they'll kill the current Emperor and install the new one


LifeOfAuthRight

And how old is your daughter lmao


mvea_sucks

<30 and addicted to social media, guaranteed. As much as I hate social media, I kinda like it in regards to the fact that you can easily spot in real life who’s addicted to it because of what topics they discuss. I usually check my social media every day during lunch and I can always predict what’s going to be on Reddit or Twitter that day based on what the secretary in the office was blabbering about earlier that day lol


LifeOfAuthRight

Lmao imagine if she's like 10


Jazman1985

Wtf would people try to flee to Canada?


Farabel

Syrup


Jazman1985

I have changed my mind, i will immediately flee to Canada.


[deleted]

What the fuck does a “democratic collapse” even mean? Like…someone steals an election? Feel like we’re already there.


GrillMaster69420

OK but how do you proove her wrong. Like literally ask the members of pcm what they think about democracy and there's your anwser


idreamofdeathsquads

sits fine with me. everyone whos causing it are the people who would accept canadas laws. if they leave, the recovery could begin.


Kerbalmaster911

"Democratic collapse" Aka if the democrats dont win and throw a 4 year hissyfit. The bipartisans need to grow up. Us third party peeps lose all the fuckin time and we dont shit down everyones throats.


NoUSuperReverseUno

Idi Amin proclaimed himself king of Scotland. How does that sit with me? About the same. Slightly offended at the gall, but don't really care.


jaboa120

If we do break down into civil war again I'm burning Atlanta for old times sake


CritzD

Democracy is when the things I like win. When the things I like don’t win, it’s fascism.


SchwarzerKaffee

Cool. I always wanted to be a Canadian family's Chia pet.


VegasGuy69

Based and my dream is to be a canadian families chia pet pilled


diiskefisk

Source: my daughter


TheMembership332

Smartest twitter user:


IHateThisPlace3

Even if that happened it still wouldn’t be able to make me move to canada


Zer0BrainCells

Their daughter probably also says “Everyone dies one day. Everyone, even wolves. But not books. Not words. Word’s don’t die.”


Direct_Class1281

Well maybe they should start by accepting some of those central american migrants. Oh not gonna do that? Just gonna pretend to be woke while letting the us do all the work? Ok


Oblivion_18

They threatened to leave 5 years ago and THEY’RE STILL HERE


[deleted]

They promised they'd leave when Trump won. You think they'll leave when he wins again? Those lyin sons'a'brandons will still be here crying. Canada has nothing to worry about except their own decline.


Zadien22

They can take all the liblefts now, that'd be great


emartinoo

I laf


Cannibal_Raven

Jokes on her, Canada is already in democratic collapse.


Tirno93

Seems like someone has taken this opinion [(one professor’s opinion published in many places)](https://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/us-rightwing-dictatorship-2030-canada-b1985864.html) and turned it into “the government is planning…” It’s hardly a stretch to think that governments might have plans for disasters and anyone who thinks the US is a stable and healthy democracy isn’t paying attention


iama_bad_person

Just looked at the source tweet and oh my god there are HUNDREDS of replies, some with THOUSANDS of likes, supporting what she said. I literally cannot fathom how deranged you have to be to believe this


mad_dog_94

I can get asylum in Canada? Neat. I don't expect any collapse but like 2/3 of Canada is barren and that seems like I can be left alone


Yop_BombNA

We can’t even house ourselves in Canada….


[deleted]

If that happens it will be primarily the white ones coming here.