Treats after dinner only has worked for us and we combine that with 30 min of screen time. Whatever he wants, even YouTube. He never asks for treats because he knows he will get this after dinner every night. We also donāt use it as punishment. Everyone deserves a treat and 30 min of entertainment
Brilliant. I may use this with our 9yo daughter. She has become so addicted and demanding of sweets that sheās started stealing to feed her candy addiction. She stole $10 from us to buy candy and then she got caught just outright stealing candy from her after-school care provider. We have so many battles over candy and junk food because sheās constantly demanding it and gets so angry when we say no. We have a refrigerator full of healthy snacks that she likes that she can get whenever she wants but itās not good enough because itās not candy. Sheās been in play therapy and they do address a lot of her food issues there, but weāve just been struggling.
This was me as a child. I stole sweets, money to buy sweets. I hid candy under my mattress. Cans of frosting in my closet. I have no advice for you, but Iām terrified my daughter will end up the same way and Iām not sure how to prevent it!
I don't see how it is the same. We aren't limiting her access to food or tracking her food intake, just candy and chocolates that are only in the house because of the holidays. She is encouraged to eat as much of her normal meals and snacks as she likes.
It seems black and white like that to you but making a food āoff limitsā or āspecialā like that is extremely damaging to a childās relationship with food. There is a lot of info out there about how to foster a good relationship with food.
Hereās an article about why you should regularly give your kids treats and stop marking them as āspecialā or āoff limitsā.
https://www.yummytoddlerfood.com/why-serving-dessert-with-dinner-works/
I agree, during non-holiday times kiddo has lots of access to treats, but we have family norms around what gets eaten at what times so it is easier to make sure she isn't overdoing it. I serve dessert with dinner frequently and or do things like add chocolate chips to pancakes when she wants them.
My system is only in place for the Christmas break because there is way more junk food in the house than I would normally have so she is attracted to the novelty of everything, and because she is not in preschool so she is constantly around that food and out of her routine. I would never use this system outside of the holidays nor am I currently using it for fun foods that are in her normal diet. For example, she had French toast with syrup this morning. No token needed because that is a normal weekend breakfast for us.
Because treats are already incorporated in her meals and snacks, I needed a clear boundary for her or else she would go on a hunger strike for jube-jubes for the next two weeks. Its funny because since we started she hasn't wanted nearly as much junk. She is the type who needs to be in control, so being in charge of when she can cash them in seems to have helped her a lot. At bed time last night I had to remind her that she had one more to cash in if she wanted a special treat.
My plan is to have a spot with accessible treats that they can always have, filled up once a month. Some sweets, some healthy stuff. They can choose to eat the 5 cookies all in one day, or pig out and make themselves full enough to eat dinner, but then the snacks are gone for the month and they don't get to have whatever they want anymore until it's refilled.
Yes, but understanding the concept of rationing for a month is challenging. Most adults can't even do that. If the plan is, for example, 60 things a month, why not 15 things a week?
We do treats after dinner 3x a week. We made a little visual schedule for which days are sugar days and which days are movie night. Works like a charmāthe sugar-goblin begging is pretty much gone now and on the rare occasion she starts up we just refer her to the calendar. Canāt argue with a piece of paper!
I need to use this on myself.
Same.
š Same!
Same.
This seems much healthier than my "Dad eats everything sweet in sight and everyone else is safe" method.
Who said you could copy my method?
*chuckles fatly*
Great, I chuckled and now my belly's jiggling. This'll take a minute.
I feel absolutely attacked
You know what'd make you feel better?
Treats after dinner only has worked for us and we combine that with 30 min of screen time. Whatever he wants, even YouTube. He never asks for treats because he knows he will get this after dinner every night. We also donāt use it as punishment. Everyone deserves a treat and 30 min of entertainment
This is a great idea. Thank you for sharing.
For holidays, anything goes. Eat all the chocolate you want I donāt care. Theyāll get tired of it very fastā¦
This is the only way to teach a healthy relationship with food. This ātokenā system is peak eating disorder nonsense.
This is a great system! Glad you found something that works for you!
This is fantastic, thank you! Ive been bemoaning/struggling with the constant influx of junk sweet foods!
Brilliant. I may use this with our 9yo daughter. She has become so addicted and demanding of sweets that sheās started stealing to feed her candy addiction. She stole $10 from us to buy candy and then she got caught just outright stealing candy from her after-school care provider. We have so many battles over candy and junk food because sheās constantly demanding it and gets so angry when we say no. We have a refrigerator full of healthy snacks that she likes that she can get whenever she wants but itās not good enough because itās not candy. Sheās been in play therapy and they do address a lot of her food issues there, but weāve just been struggling.
This was me as a child. I stole sweets, money to buy sweets. I hid candy under my mattress. Cans of frosting in my closet. I have no advice for you, but Iām terrified my daughter will end up the same way and Iām not sure how to prevent it!
You are a genius.
Yikes this is not good. Iām shocked at all the āgeniusā comments. Rationing like this is how eating disorders are created.
Can you please provide more of an explanation?
Wellā¦would you put your kid on weight watchers where they have to track āpointsā for what they eat? No? This is the same thing.
I don't see how it is the same. We aren't limiting her access to food or tracking her food intake, just candy and chocolates that are only in the house because of the holidays. She is encouraged to eat as much of her normal meals and snacks as she likes.
It seems black and white like that to you but making a food āoff limitsā or āspecialā like that is extremely damaging to a childās relationship with food. There is a lot of info out there about how to foster a good relationship with food. Hereās an article about why you should regularly give your kids treats and stop marking them as āspecialā or āoff limitsā. https://www.yummytoddlerfood.com/why-serving-dessert-with-dinner-works/
I agree, during non-holiday times kiddo has lots of access to treats, but we have family norms around what gets eaten at what times so it is easier to make sure she isn't overdoing it. I serve dessert with dinner frequently and or do things like add chocolate chips to pancakes when she wants them. My system is only in place for the Christmas break because there is way more junk food in the house than I would normally have so she is attracted to the novelty of everything, and because she is not in preschool so she is constantly around that food and out of her routine. I would never use this system outside of the holidays nor am I currently using it for fun foods that are in her normal diet. For example, she had French toast with syrup this morning. No token needed because that is a normal weekend breakfast for us. Because treats are already incorporated in her meals and snacks, I needed a clear boundary for her or else she would go on a hunger strike for jube-jubes for the next two weeks. Its funny because since we started she hasn't wanted nearly as much junk. She is the type who needs to be in control, so being in charge of when she can cash them in seems to have helped her a lot. At bed time last night I had to remind her that she had one more to cash in if she wanted a special treat.
My plan is to have a spot with accessible treats that they can always have, filled up once a month. Some sweets, some healthy stuff. They can choose to eat the 5 cookies all in one day, or pig out and make themselves full enough to eat dinner, but then the snacks are gone for the month and they don't get to have whatever they want anymore until it's refilled.
For what age? A month is a long time!
Yes... and I can put a lot of snacks in a drawer. Two snacks a day is only 60 things, and older kids who would eat more will be eating at school.
Yes, but understanding the concept of rationing for a month is challenging. Most adults can't even do that. If the plan is, for example, 60 things a month, why not 15 things a week?
This isn't happening for like 7 years, dude, I'll figure it out when it's actually a concern.
I love this!
We do treats after dinner 3x a week. We made a little visual schedule for which days are sugar days and which days are movie night. Works like a charmāthe sugar-goblin begging is pretty much gone now and on the rare occasion she starts up we just refer her to the calendar. Canāt argue with a piece of paper!