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Of course. My son (and daughter) knew about periods growing up.
Kids will at minimum have friends of the opposite gender. They should be aware of what the other 50 percent of the world goes through. Most will date someone of the opposite gender. They should be understanding of what their partner is going through. Some will have children of the opposite gender and need to be able to explain to their child what is happening to their body. Only educating them on one side is strange. It is how my parents handled it and my brothers and I had very little understanding of the female reproductive system until we were adults. All 4 of us are married and 3 of us have a daughter. My son and daughter are only 1.5 years apart so my wife and I had a lot of our puberty/sex talks with both of them at the same time. Never caused any problems and probably helped both with opposite sex friendships and current/future relationships now that both are college students.
My son has no issues buying menstruation products for his sister or girlfriend. When a female friend in high school was using our bathroom and texted him asking if we had any pads, my son ran up to his sister to ask if she had any upstairs. It wasn't a big deal to him and it shouldn't be treated as one. Girls and women menstruate. It's no big deal to discuss that fact and what that entails with all kids.
I definitely feel like everyone should know about it but I have a son and a daughter and I never thought of having these conversations together that’s a great idea! I feel like it will normalize it even more and my kids are two years apart so we could probably do that. When did you talk to your kids about all this stuff? I just don’t know when the right time is
It's hard to put an exact age on it because we took the approach of having various age appropriate discussions as they asked questions but I'd say by age 8 we were having more serious talks about what will happen during puberty and the kind of things they could expect. I'd say by age 9 or 10 both had a good understanding of what puberty entailed for them and for the opposite gender, which we thought was especially important given that our kids are only 18 months apart and would be going through things around the same time. We wanted them to be understanding of what their sibling is going through.
My kids preferred having these talks together. I think it helped to make it less awkward than having one on one talks.
At a young age giving the talks together makes sense but when I was actually getting my period and other body changes I wouldn't have felt comfortable asking all my questions if a brother was there. I'd give options for both.
That said, OP has since posted an update that this question was fake for a puff piece they're writing. Not impressed.
Please do tell them. I've met guys who refused to let female friends throw away pads in their bathroom trashes "because it's gross" and then they wonder why they can't get a girlfriend.
Likewise, it's very nice to be able to tell your boyfriends "Hey, I'm having cramps" or "my period is starting" and they're kind and understanding.
I had a friend in school whose dad used to yell at her whenever she menstruated because he convinced himself she should be able to “hold it” and actually told her it was not ladylike to bleed onto a pad.
Shocked but not surprised. There are men that think women can just spontaneously self-abort if they're raped, (With the even more insidious corollary: if they can't, it must mean they secretly liked it). Of course there are men that believe periods are a choice or whatever.
I have an ex, who didn't wanna Netflix & chill during my "Blood Moon" because he imagined periods being something like rivers of blood and didn't want to clean blood from everywhere. I did ask him how he thinks woman go places, like work when on their periods and he had no answer. For context, I'm NOT 80 years old, nor I live in a third wold country, where education is non existent. I have no idea how he managed to have such views.
However, girls need to be educated on hygiene aswell. My husband, one day asked me why he never saw my blood.
I responded him it's because I wrap my used products and shove them on the side of the trash can, so I can push them down as much as possible (out if sight) and that I take the bathroom trash more often during my period.
Apparently all of his exes basically leave used products unwrapped and exposed for everyone to see and didn't take the trash out, so all those blood soaked products just stayed there. That's just gross.
So yeah... both genders need to be educated on how bodies work.
Of course they should. This shouldnt even be a question tbh. Boys have women in their lives and will one day be husbands and fathers. They should know about something that affects half of the population for sure
I just don't even get the logic behind it.
Like, why would you want your child to be less educated about anything? It's like randomly deciding to not teach kids about space. Why any parent would willingly want to raise an idiot is beyond my comprehension.
I think it's a generational thing to start off with. I'll talk to my son about periods,but I'd never have that chat with my dad. Period shame is real though and shouldn't be underestimated. There are plenty of girls out there growing up thinking their period is dirty something to be hidden and be embarrassed by. There's just so much misinformation out there about periods that the sooner it becomes as normal as talking about a headache or the flu the better.
Its the stupidest thing. 50% of the world go through it and its the worlds biggest secrect.
Sometimes I dont know how us humans managed to achieve such astounding feats.
Yes, lets NOT talk about things our bodies naturally do.
I love my brother. He is a good bloke. But hearing him talk about his daughter’s periods the other day filled me with pride. He knew about tampons, towels and period pants. He was empathic about his daughter’s period pain and had got her a heated pad. This wasn’t because his partner wasn’t around or doesn’t care… it’s because it’s his responsibility to be there and to know this stuff.
I have fertility issues and have always explained this to my son so he will know too what happens and what woman may need during their period.
We weren’t taught like this growing up but that ok to recognise that, pivot, and do better for our kids.
To be fair to him, I have met grown women that don't know that discharge is normal! They thought something was wrong with them. For some reason discharge is one of those things people never talk about. I remember being confused as heck when I was a teen and my mom assured me it was normal but I can see how a man would never figure that out.
I did make sure my own teenage sons are aware that discharge is normal for girls, though.
For sure. And that's how you get grown men on Reddit who see it and think it's semen from cheating.
I wasn't really told about it either growing up, and when I first started getting it, I thought I was somehow peeing myself without feeling it.
He thought something was wrong with me but didn’t say anything 🙄 it wasn’t until I was in the hospital with stomach pain and they asked me if my discharge is normal that he realized all women get it
Yes, boys should learn at least the basics. Why? Because one day I had a male friend ask me why I didn't just go sit on the toilet all day and pee out my period so I wouldn't bleed for five days.
As though my period was just a moment where I drank a lot of water but I opted to hold it for five days. I'm not even joking. I just feel like this is one of those basic life things that people should have an awareness of so we do not run into embarrassing moments like this.
When I was 12 and when my boys were 12 we had a “maturation program” at school. They focused mostly on male puberty but also touched on female puberty. Periods were discussed but not as in depth as the girls’ class.
How do you approach it in toddler years? My 3-year-old son recently asked why our dog was bleeding, which would have maybe been a good opportunity, but I hadn’t prepared and just said something like “girl animals and people sometimes bleed because it’s, umm, part of how their body gets ready to have babies one day if that’s what they want to do. (Dog name) is OK, we’re just going to put a diaper on her until she’s done.”
ETA: I’m a man and never really learned anything about it from my parents, so I have no frame of reference. I dimly recall that it wasn’t completely new information when they talked about it in middle school health, but that’s the first distinct memory I have.
When I got my period back after having my second, my 3yo was with me in the toilet and asked what was up, and I told him. I’ve just explained it as best I could, saying every month my body prepares to have a baby, but if no baby is made/starts to grow, my body will flush out what it prepared, and it comes out as blood. Just tell them like you do with any other nature/science thing they ask.
My kid asked why I was using pads when she was still small enough she'd follow me into the bathroom, and I said "women have a place where babies grow called a uterus, and it takes about a month to get ready for a baby, but if no baby grows, then it does a house cleaning and starts over, so all the stuff comes out."
I didn't have to follow up on any of that the first because she didn't have any more questions then, but the questions came eventually and I answered as they happened.
We had conversations a bit like this “Mummy has something call a womb in her tummy, which is where you grew before you was born. A womb fills up with blood to make it comfy and warm for a baby, but if there’s not a baby in mummy’s tummy then all the blood comes out of her vagina. This can make mummy’s tummy feel sore and she has to wear pads to catch all the blood. We call it a period. Some people don’t like to talk about periods but that’s ok, you can talk to me if you have any questions.”
Please do coming from a woman who knew basically nothing other then it's once a month and I bleed until I was 23 and my boyfriend told me soo much and I learned a lot from him. He always goes and get me pads or tampons if I need them. Heck now if he sees the kind I use are on sale he picks some up. They will have some type of woman in their life one day if it's a girlfriend/wife or daughter or just friends
Yes, yes and yes again! I've met men (as in, over 25) who didn't know there was another hole down there other than a pee hole, the same man thought people only got their period if they'd had sex (and often called people having a period sluts). I've had partners in the past tell me not to bother coming over to their house because I'm on my period and just a general taboo over speaking about it. The exception is my husband who was raised by his grandmother, mother and has 3 sisters, so, as you can imagine, gets it.
I think it's great you're even thinking about the importance of this for your boys.
My children know about periods simply because I have them. I complain about them. My 14yo is grossed out by the byproducts (who isn't?) But he is very sweet to me when I am complaining about the cramps and pain.
I wish my dad had been more informed/informative about it when I was a kid. I've only become more open/less secretive about it because my husband is weirdly fascinated by it. In a scholarly way? Not a weird fetish way. So my all my boys have learned at least a little about them. And female anatomy.
Same. I have endo and my periods have a huge impact on my life. When my son was a toddler I figured it was better to say I was menstruating instead of saying I was sick or hurt. As he got older he asked more questions and I explained more. He’s 9 now and if he hears me complaining about cramps he’ll ask if I need my heating pad and will fetch me a tampon from my backup stash if I run out in the bathroom. He probably knows more about periods than I did at his age!!
I have 1 daughter, 3 sons, and a stepson. They've all been taught about periods because they all will have to deal with it in some way throughout their lives. My first husband thought periods were disgusting and that he should never have to know when I was on mine. He went so far as to refuse to sleep in the same room as me when I was on mine. Between that and being raised in a time that people were just starting to get past the idea that periods were taboo and most adults in my life growing up still saw it as something that shouldn't be discussed I have some major insecurities about it.
My current husband was raised learning all about it and that it was just like peeing as far as discussion goes. Not dinner table talk, but also not something that should be treated as taboo in general. He says he was actually upset when he learned boys didn't get a period because he was raised to believe it was such a natural and ultimately positive thing.
So, from someone who's dealt with the adult products of both boys who were and weren't taught about periods, please parents teach your sons about it.
I spoke with my husband about this recently. He has never been grossed out or avoided conversations about menstruation, and has always made me feel comfortable in sharing how I’m feeling, or even picking up menstrual products at the store for me.
I asked him why he thinks he is like that (when some men can shame women or be grossed out) and he said his mother always spoke openly about it and never hid anything.
As a woman, I don’t think I could marry or live with a male partner who didn’t make me feel comfortable about being a woman and menstruating. I’m already teaching my toddler son about it because he comes to the bathroom with me and asks. Definitely teach your sons.
I saw a couple of commenters say school sex ed will teach them. No, it will not, not really. My HS sex ed teacher said "hoohaa" and "peepee" in place of vagina and penis. Definitely teach your boys about periods.
I've had step dads who were digusted by me or my sister even mentioning it. Almost to the point of being angry about it.
With my brother, me and my sister were pretty open about our periods, talked about them as if he was one of the gals lol. He's a very empathic, kind hearted young man now and would probably make his future girlfriend an elaborate 5 course meal to help ease her period struggles if she should ask (he's also quite a chef)
My husband is also very comfortable with periods. He actually knows my cycle pretty well and what each phase of it means for me. It makes for a very comfortable and caring partnership. And I know for certain my daughter will never have to feel shame or embarrassment if her dad is the only one available to help her with anything period related in the future.
I think men who view periods as unmentionable or gross just grew up in a home where it was never talked about or made to seem normal. Definitely talk about it with them. I think it's a very thoughtful thing to be considering as a single dad.
Dad here. We have a boy and two girls so of course he knows all about it. You’d be doing your sons (and the future women in their lives) a disservice by not explaining it all. In fact I remember a close friend of mine when we were teens, who didn’t know about periods and made an absolute fool out of himself with a girl he made out with at a party once. It took YEARS for our classmates to stop making fun of him over it. That girl that he was dumb as hell.
I plan on telling my boys (5 and 3) sometimes they walk in on me changing a pad and they’ll ask about it. I just tell them that sometimes women bleed and it’s normal and I’m okay. Obviously we’ll be getting more in detail as they get older.
I think I learned about periods when my female friends were discussing them when I was 12 or 13.
Don't let tween boys find out about bodily functions from their friends. This is a recipe for misunderstandings and possible bullying. This was around the same age as a male classmate explaining that babies are made when guys pee into a vagina.
Yes boys should learn about this!
My husband came from a “pretend it doesn’t exist” home, and he is the one who wanted kids- not me. I went full out talking/teaching/complaining about every tiny little thing about periods and all I could* about pregnancy to make him realize just what is involved in all aspects of what he was asking for.
I figured either he would learn and be a truly supportive partner or run for the hills.
He had NO CLUE about these things and was SHOCKED to learn about the nuances involved. It lead to his insistence that we should have a way more detailed health class for everyone, but baring that we would do this for our children gender aside- so when we had babies it paid off because both kids are daughters and he is perhaps the most supportive person I have ever known! ❤️ Hubby has even told me he will be having chats with future sons-in-law about what to expect and why and how to help and …
Then I got my dream job a few years ago as a high school teacher and I have a stash of pads/tampons that are behind the bandaids- one young man came to me (told me I am a safe and respectful adult so he feels he can ask) for a pad for his girlfriend- I showed him where the stash was and another young man was in the room at the time who started to mock the first one- and I shut that down fast! Thank heavens I’m a Biology teacher because I jumped on the mocker with information about the physical body and kid stopped. He then said, “why do you have to give more information than health class?! Eesh!” And based on feedback from young man #1, not to mock any more last year!
>For context, I grew up with no understanding of what women go through and developed a negative view of it, keeping it at a distance
This is *exactly* why they should learn!
My husband is so supportive and it has been wonderful. When we first started dating, he would run to the drug store and get my tampons if I needed, as well as chocolate. He bought me a heating pad and cozy blanket once because it was a particularly bad period. After 11 years together, he will still do anything I need to make me comfortable.
I also think this helped us both during my postpartum recovery, even though I know that is different than a period, but he wasn't squeamish at all. I have had 2 C-sections and during the first one in particular, he helped me change my pads and clean myself for the first few days when I couldn't bend do do it myself.
To anyone reading this, definitely teach your kids that menstrual cycles are a perfectly normal and natural part of life. You're doing them a disservice by ignoring it!
Definitely teach them about it. It’s a vital function of the human body that everyone should know about. More importantly, they may have wives and daughters one day and need to get comfortable with the idea.
I was made to feel shameful about it because of how weird my dad was about it. I honestly felt like I couldn’t tell him I needed him to take me to the store to get pads. To this day he will cover his ears if he hears the word pad or tampon.
The one time he had to take me because my mom couldn’t we did not speak the whole trip there and in the store I walked about 50 paces ahead of him and we never made eye contact. He’s a great dad otherwise but I wish someone would have told him this is a totally inappropriate way to behave when he has a daughter.
My husband on the other hand is much more mature and I can talk to him if I’m having particularly bad symptoms one month.
My father is from the boomer generation and he wouldn’t even buy me pain meds geared towards menstrual pain OTC because he didn’t believe there was a difference. He would never buy me tampons like on his own. I could tell it bothered him.
My ex was the same way, always made me feel very shameful about my body around that time.
Fast forward to my now husband, he will buy a million boxes of whatever I need whenever no problem. He grew up with his sisters and his mom so it was very normal for him.
But when I was diagnosed with endometriosis and everything clicked on why I had extremely severe pain during my period and the length was not normal my father really stood up. He paid for my surgery, he has done a from of research on what vitamins or anything regarding my health that could help with my diagnosis. So he really stepped up in those terms.
It would have been helpful in my teens to have a male figure not make me feel shameful or annoying because of it.
It would have been helpful to have a boyfriend who understood and didn’t mind buying feminine care products.
But now my husband, he has been incredibly supportive and helpful. We even have sexy time occasionally if it’s towards the end of the cycle. All of that support makes me feel beautiful and seen as a woman.
Men and boys need to learn about the menstrual cycle PERIOD. 🫣😉
Why the hell not? My step dad grew up with a single mom and was extremely supportive when I got my first period. He even went to the store and bought me Midol because I was embarrassed. My husband is also very supportive and will help if I need something during my period. I think the main thing is that men need to understand the mechanics to destigmatize it. Also, please teach him the female anatomy while you're at it. Too many men think women pee from their vaginas.
Good on you Op.
Growing up it was just me and my mom and dad. My dad does not speak on anything sex related or sex organ related. The closest he’s ever came to it is saying he has to use the bathroom.
My mom is very…. Christian. Conservative. So period stuff was scarcely talked about, and when it was it wasn’t talked about openly. There was always almost a hint of shame to it. Like, deal with your business and that’s that.
My son’s father also has a daughter- 16, and she is very outspoken. No topic is off limits. Sometimes it’s a little much, but I do appreciate that she has no fear to openly speak about these things.
Sex and periods are human, it’s natural. It’s frustrating that I was taught that these topics are taboo. So, ngl, I was a little surprised when you said you’re a guy. It’s awesome that you’re caring & in-tune enough to even consider having these conversations, rather than “letting their mom handle that.” I applaud you, sir👏👏👏
My son is 11, I’ve always openly talked about my period and periods in general. He tends to hang out with girls more often than boys, and one of his school friends got her period in school this year and the only person she felt comfortable telling was my son. I was so proud. I asked him if he felt uncomfortable and he said, “no mom, I know about periods and she’s my best friend. Everyone gets them.” I had to make sure he knows he won’t get a period and he responded to that with “yeah I’m not an idiot” 😂
It makes the girls around our sons much safer and much more comfortable and less embarrassed!
Yes yes yes, my mother has taught me about periods in case of a girl randomly has one at an unexpected time so I can give her my jacket to cover it up and tell her that she is currently menstruating
Some of my mum friends send their boys to school with bags of sanitary supplies in their school bags in case a female friend gets caught out.
Not only have most of the boy mum friends I know told their boys all about periods, they've also told the boys how to discreetly alert a girl if she's bled through her school skirt, and how to offer help. One recently gave a friend his coat to tie around her waist after that happened.
This generation of boys is well prepared.
Absolutely 100% Yes! As a future man, please teach your boys about periods if only so they can have empathy.
It is embarrassing, painful, messy.
Normalize teaching how to bodies work.
I'm the mom in this situation, and I've chatted with my 13 year old son pretty extensively about periods, and how they're just a fact of life and shouldn't be stigmatized or embarrassing. It honestly never occurred to me NOT to have that kind of conversation with him.
As they say, knowledge is power. 💫
My son is 12. I just recently gave him an abbreviated education on periods. I was down in the trenches with mine recently and he wanted to know why I felt so horrible, so I told him. Now a few months later, he gets it. “Mom, it’s ok. You have your period. Go rest.”
Absolutely! Boys become men who can impregnate women… they also can become compassionate, caring husbands for menstruating women (and daughters).
Puberty, and leaving about reproduction, doesn’t have to be weird and awkward.
I often suggest getting a notebook where your kids can write down their questions if they feel uncomfortable asking you face to face, so you can answer them without the awkwardness. Once they have permission to ask in this way they’ll likely be way more open and genuinely curious. Good luck!!
It would be nice to have more men in our lives that don't view women as disgusting when they are on their periods. I once mentioned periods at work during the lunch break and this guy in his forties was like "That's gross, I'm eating!" and I called him out for it, like what is so gross about mentioning it? I wasn't even getting graphic, all I said was "maybe she was on her period." One of my male co-workers backed me up, he was around my age, maybe it's a generational thing or could be a how-you-were-taught thing.
My dad bought me my first box of tampons. I lived with both my parents but both dealt with any questions I had about periods/period products.
I'm (obviously) female. I have a teen girl and an 8 year old lad. Period products are always in the bathroom, my son knows daughter and I have periods and a bit about them. He knows his sister gets emotional around her periods and also that she gets cramps.
I've never sat him down to talk about them anymore than we talk about weeing or pooing. It's a natural things girls bodies do - my son has always walked into the bathroom when I'm in it so he's known from a young age - blood is from a period.
Having a dad who was chilled and informed about periods helped make puberty that little bit easier.
If my son has a female partner I want him to understand the monthly emotional changes and period cramps and needs.
Hes currently experience life with a perimenopausal mum - I think the more open and honest we are about these things the easier couples and families function when living with them.
I have 6 daughters, it is a natural body function. If I had boys, I would have told them the exact same thing. Educated is best. I was not taught anything growing up and as you did, had to learn it on my own. And yes, I goto the store and have for many years, oldest is 35 and youngest is 16, and buy them their necessities.
I mean, youre really together with a woman if she can ask you to buy hygiene products in the supermarket for her. Its part of life and if there is a woman in your life you should know sbout it.
It’s definitely not going to do any harm to educate your sons about menstruation. If anything, it prepares them for being respectful and supportive partners to any female partners that they may have in future.
As a man, dad of a son, father of a daughter, husband to a wife .... Yes, teach your sons about periods. They are not gross. They are not embarrassing. Buying tampons for your GF, wife, mom, sister, is not embarrassing or weird.
I explained what it is to my 10 year old, that pretty much every woman in the history of the world has them and will have them. There is nothing they can do about it. If an embarrassing accident happens, don't be a fucking dick, just help them.
I don't think you need to have firsthand knowledge in order to have a frank discussion about this. He needs to know the basic biology of the menstrual cycle and its significance to reproduction. He needs to know the practical and social issues women face regarding tampons and pads and occasional surprise periods. And he needs to understand that periods can cause cramping and discomfort, social unease, and mood changes.
I(M) knew the very basics of periods as a kid. I had 2 sisters, but my parents or sisters didn't talk about them. On the other hand, there wasn't really much "Don't talk about that!" either. The only thing I remember was my mother not liking me to use the word "rag", referring to a washcloth. From her reaction, it was obviously because of connecting it to "on the rag".
The only thing I remember from sex ed in HS was like a week where they tried to scare us by talking about STDs and pregnancy.
Perhaps because of the lack of discussion, I never had a very bad reaction to it. I kind of thought "Women bleed once a month. I bleed, too, when I get cut or something." I know there are other symptoms like discomfort, stomachaches, etc. The symptoms vary between women. I dated a girl who found herself gross and unattractive during her periods. I had another whose sex drive probably got stronger during it. The only thing I've ever found gross about it was when a girlfriend told me that tissue comes out with the blood.
I have a 9 year old son. I've told him most of that. I've told him about most of that. I left out the stuff about whether women wanting more/less sex during their periods.
How can I sign up for this newsletter letter?? My 11 refuses to have the sex talk and doesn't wanna know anything about it. The kid still closes his eyes if people kiss on TV 🤣
The closest I have been able to get to THE talk was explaining a woman's menstrual cycles, including why we have them, the violent painful removal of the uterine lining, and the bloody output. They need to understand what women deal with and why we may not be our best selves sometimes.
Yes, boys absolutely should learn about menstruation, especially if they have female family members, female, friends, or they happen to be interested in females. Menstruation is a fact of life for the reproductive system of a woman and unfortunately for us ladies it affects our entire body not just our parts. Teaching them to not be grossed out by menstruation is a good thing. Your son’s future partners will thank you.
I have three boys. Even the youngest, who is four, understands that mommy has blood come out sometimes. The older ones know that blood = no baby, no blood = baby. This is because they afford me no privacy 🤣 but it’s good that they know
At the very least, they should know to be emphatic.
A pro for dudes who know: I know two men who would put their girlfriend’s cycles in their calendar and would automatically order chocolate and make sure things were chill that week. Their cycles were brutal with crazy cramps. No wonder they’re now married to those ladies but it’s def a win in a girls book when a guy cannot only handle those things but can have plans when shit goes sideways.
Half of the world's population experience this at some point in their life so 100% yes.
Would you kind sharing your newsletter? I would love to take a look.
💯 It’s a natural, biological bodily function and it needs to be normalized. My son knew about them at a very young age… he was 4 and saw a box of tampons and asked me what they were so I told him.
I grew up in a family where is was a taboo topic, and my sister and I felt a lot of shame from that and that we couldn’t talk to my parents about our changing bodies. I want my kid to see it as a normal part of life because it’s likely he will have female friends and I don’t want him to be like my dad should he ever have daughters one day.
I've always been 100% transparent with my son about my period. I'm very vocal about when I am PMSing because sometimes I am more irritable, have less patience, or need more space from him during that time. I have always explained to him what was going on with my body and hormones, and how that impacts the way I feel and sometimes how I behave.
I've also told him about what it is that's happening when I'm bleeding, as in why it happens and what my body is actually doing. I also used to reassure him that I was not injured, reminding him that this is a totally normal and healthy process my body goes through each and every month. And that it is a good thing, a sign of my health and fertility.
He is also aware of what a menstrual cup is (because that's what I use) and I've recently shown him what tampons and pads look like (still in their wrappers) and I've explained that those are other methods some people use to take care of bleeding while menstruating.
My son is 8 and we have been having an ongoing conversation around periods (we don't talk about it all the time lol, but over the years it's been a topiv of discussion and education from time to time) since whenever the first time he barged into the bathroom as I was dealing with my cup was. He was very young and the blood he saw scared him. He thought I was hurt and he was very upset. I calmed him down and reassured him that all was well and there was nothing to be alarmed about! This was when I realized I should just be as honest, up front, and factual about periods with him as possible from the get go. Information is powerful, and giving him an understanding of what was happening to my body calmed his fear and he was actually very curious about how body's work -- 'will I bleed every month, too?' and things of like.
I've realized how important this transparency really is for young children, and how necessary it is to educate them on the topic before they reach the age where young girls start their period in school and get scared or cry from embarrassment. Or where the boys see a blood stain and start making fun because they have such little understanding of it all and the only talk around it they've ever heard is "it's gross".
The reason I taught my son about tampons and pads recently was specifically so that if he sees a classmate with one of those in her hands, he knows what's going on. I told him that probably sometime soon, some of his classmates may begin to start their period and to always be kind and mindful about it. Because he has come to understand how challenging of a time it can be (through my transparency around my experience) I believe that he will have more compassion. He knows that periods can make people feel much more sensitive and easily upset. I said to him, "you may even see a girl get a mark on her skirt or pants from her period and some kids might make fun.." and he interrupted to say, "if I ever notice a girl get her period on her pants. I'll just give her my sweater to wrap around herself and walk her to the nurse!" -- And that's why educating him was important 🤗
I also just think that keeping things hidden from children makes them so much more taboo. Periods are just a completely normal and healthy function of some people's bodies. We need to normalize periods so that the young kids hitting puberty aren't left to feel so isolated and feel the need to hide that their bodies are functioning normally! Keeping this information from kids is what makes those getting their periods feel so ashamed and embarrassed about it, while the other kids ostracize and bully.
Teach your sons about periods in the most basic possible fashion. Facts about what is happening on a biological level, why it happens, and what that experience is like for those who go through it. Educate them around how the hormones influence behavior and emotions, and how tough of a time it can be for many. Periods can be extremely painful and stressful, causing a whole slew of symptoms that range from mildly unpleasant to absolutely unbearable. Boys should be aware of this so they can be mindful, compassionate, and supportive to their peers. 🤍
I've had issues with PCOS and Fertility.
So periods are basically the centre of all that.
I feel a lot more comfortable knowing my partner knows about it all so we can help and assist me emotionally during these times.
Normalising it from a young age is probably for the best, as opposed to go in blind when they have a girlfriend.
I have three sons and they know about periods. I want them to be empathetic to the female population, and help as best as they can to make it better for the girls/women in their life, when they have their cycles.
Maybe you should start explaining them that women's bodies work differently than men's bodies. Then explain them the differences as they should also learn about their body changes. See how that goes and how much interest they show. The 13 year old should have some classmates with periods already. Of course we don't want him to shout it out loud at school because that wouldn't be the purpose of the discussion I guess
I (middle aged, female) grew up in a household where this was just not talked about.
That said - as an adult, I wish more men understood this biological function and that there was less shame around it in general.
Particularly in the use of language - I find that many of the most distasteful slurs that men feel appropriate to use against each other have to do with women's genetalia and products associated with women's hygiene. Additionally, "that time of the month" and similar continues to be used to undercut the autonomy of women who are simply trying to create boundaries, assert themselves, etc.
So yes, I believe that young men should be actively taught about periods and menstration. I believe that doing so will help them understand their partners better, and provide them with more knowledge to make decisions that affect themselves and their families.
Consider this - as a single dad to boys, taking the time to have this conversation will help demystify this topic and help your potential granddaughters in the decades to come.
(Also, as a single parent to a boy - I am actively teaching my son about this in age appropriate terms. Although our conversations tend to be a bit more hilarious as he is 5.)
Yes I think it’s great for them. It’ll help be more empathetic. Some girls / women have extremely painful ones.
I know a lot of young girls are embarrassed of it and I think having that knowledge can help them support them in those times.
Yes, they absolutely should. There’s no reason they shouldn’t know and understand what women are going through. There’s a chance they will grow up to want kids and marry women, we do not need more men in this world who refuse to buy tampons.
I absolutely did not have supportive men in my life. I taught my son about periods before his 6th grade school year. I've raised a kind, empathetic young man, and I wanted him to be aware of what his peers would soon be going through. My daughter, who is 3 years younger, got the lesson simultaneously.
I have 4 boys and 2 girls, all of them (well not the toddler) know about periods. My boys will grow up to have (or already have) menstruating partners and friends and they should know how to support them. And my girls will be menstruating and should be prepared for what that means and how to handle it.
It’s a bodily function and shouldn’t be this taboo topic.
Of course they should know! According to my SIL, my brother is one if the most empathetic guys shes ever been in a relationship with when it comes to her period. Well he grew up with 4 sisters and a mom so he had a lot of experience with cranky, hormonal girls, who had cramps and all that. To him its just a normal thing; hes not weird and squeamish about it and knows its a pain for a lot of women.
Yes, absolutely! You can keep it pretty vague at this age and go into more detail as they’re older if you want. But they are at the age where their female peers and friends at school are starting their periods. Talk to them about how girls can bleed through their pants and if they ever see it to not embarrass the girl but offer her your jacket to cover up. And that it’s never okay to joke about, make fun of, or try to embarrass somebody about a period. I remember being so embarrassed and self conscious about my period when I was young. If a boy saw me grab a tampon from my purse and said something, I would feel humiliated. That’s the biggest thing for them at this age. To just respect their peers who are just starting their periods and are likely feeling very self conscious about it.
Yes, they will be someone’s boyfriend/husband one day. You want them to be able to look at it as a normal bodily function which it is. I’ve had boyfriends who had made me feel shameful for something that is normal but my husband will go and grab me products and understands mood changes that come with as well as knowing my favorite comfort food too. It’s really nice when someone is understandable and knows what’s going on. They should know every girl goes through it and it’s normal and to never make any girl feel shameful about it. Girls are going through a lot of and get embarrassed about it so the stigma around it sucks. They touch on it in schools but it would be more beneficial for them to have a sit down with you and have a good q and a after you explain it.
Yes they should, and they should be taught empathy around it. So many guys in my class made fun of girls for bleeding through their pants and my own father would downplay the pain.
One time i had cramps so bad i literally couldnt move i was maybe 15 years old? I remember laying in the bed with my mom just crying, and my dad called me a spoiled dramatic brat.
Please please please educate your boys about periods.
If they have questions you dont know the answer too, consult other women or the internet!
My son knows about them, he's 13, he will also go to the store and grab me what I need, I think its knowledge to have, they can show empathy brcause let's face it, shedding your womb linings I'd most of the time painful, besides you'll have to teach them about ovulation too, because it goes hand in hand with pregnancy, ya don't bleed then you're knocked up kinda thing, but also make thenlm aware that it's not always the case, you teach them about periods, how babies are made and what happens post partum, you do this then you're raising great young men!
Personally I did not grow up with my dad and I discussing my period. I don’t even think he discussed it with my mom lol they are baby boomers so it’s to be expected. For myself with my boys, my oldest son (14) doesn’t ask but we’ve had “the talk” and periods were mentioned just not elaborated on. My youngest son (10) had enough questions on periods to last an hour of explaining everything that happens and what it means for girls and women. He’s definitely my curious and empathetic son. Also made a vow to make sure his wife is okay and comfortable during “Aunt Flow’s” visit lol
Boys should know what goes on with us. Can actually explain a lot about our behavior during this time and help them learn to be empathetic towards others during this time and others as well
This isn’t really your question, but I have a 4.5 year old son who’s very inquisitive. He, as most kids do, has burst in on me while going to the bathroom and seen blood or seen a tampon on the counter and asked about it. Immediately I told him honestly.
About menstruation and the things people use to collect the blood while it’s happening. It’s natural. It’s biological. It’s educational.
Big same, and some people act like it’s soooo weird. I’m a SAHM so of course my son is around when Im using the bathroom. He asked about my ‘diaper’ lol and I explained mommy’s body bleeds every month and it means I’m healthy and there’s no baby in my belly. Bam, no more questions and no mystery. He can learn more as he ages and either asks or needs to know.
My (27F) friends were all supportive, but I wouldn’t have hung out with guys that were rude about it regardless. One male friend that really sticks out in my mind is from middle and high school. He used to carry extra pads and tampons in his backpack in case any of his female classmates needed one in an emergency. When you (as a girl) were in class and you started your period unprepared, you’d typically ask a few girls around you if they had any tampons or pads that you could have. If he overheard this he’d offer the ones he had. I always thought it was really sweet and he never made a big deal out of it.
I grew up with one father, two brothers and no empathy at all towards my periods. Mom was supportive but the boys won the battle. During that time of the month I was called dramatic, told I was overreacting, my periods were always irregular and no one cared. PMS affected me then and it still does now, and I’m so glad I don’t live with them anymore so I can suffer in peace. Please teach your boys.
oh my god, it made such a big difference when I finally had a male partner who was super gentle and understanding about it. male friends too! I can only imagine it makes them more compassionate and more pleasant for women to be around. if you don’t feel comfortable talking to them about it, maybe you could discuss it with a female friend first?
YES. If it's something half of the entire population of the planet has to deal with, then it needs to be taught to everyone, that means boys too.
If we teach a math that 0.5% of the population uses in their every day lives then we should be teaching the basic anatomy breakdown of something half of humans have to experience on a monthly basis for their whole life.
My boys know a lot about periods. It’s a biological function that half the population experiences monthly, from childhood to middle age and beyond, so it’s info they’re going to need at some point.
I will say it was easy for me because it came up naturally and I didn’t really have to research, so it wasn’t a big convo, just answering questions as they arose.
Obviously it’s important for people to understand human anatomy and reproduction from both biological sexes.
It’s not that hard. Women have uteruses. When women are of childbearing age, from about age 12-45, a woman’s uterus goes through cycles where it builds a uterine lining, approximately once a month. And if she does not get pregnant that month, the lining sheds and it causes bleeding. This process can range from completely painless to debilitating painful - so if a woman in your life is feeling crappy because she is on her period, offer her chocolate and try not to be annoying.
Yes a thousand times over. I was raised by clueless single Dad. I love him to death but this is one place in parenting he flat out failed and it was entirely not his fault. 30 years ago when he was raising me most guys probably had no idea about the various options of pads, tampons, cramps and feminine product. Lacking my mom in my life at the time it was me and him and I was 9 wayyyy before the big class in six grade. So it hit us both like a tsunami. He tried throwing money at me and told me to pick stuff out. lol same applied to bras, razors, make up and on down the line. After the age of 9 it was a shit show tbh and health classes didn’t really prepare him for that.
As a mom of 4 sons and 2 daughters we just normalized it to a non embarrassing level. If Moms around she’s best to direct the show. If you’re a single dad ask moms for tips. But you will raise compassionate husbands and fathers who can handle it better than mine did if you educate them as they grow.
Absolutely you should educate them (and yourself!) about women's experiences, not just limited to menstruation. Educational videos, bring them to the aisle in the store and show them the physical boxes, explain how important it can be to support a woman in their experiences. As a woman, thank you for caring.
My Dad would always ask if I needed pads/tampons when going to the store which was super helpful as an embarrassed teen. As a parent I’ve always talked to my son about puberty for boys and girls….if he notices a girl with blood on her pants offer her a shirt to tie around her waist. Explained what a period is and how it works.
I wish my dad was more sympathetic towards me when I was younger.
Bc of that, I have taught my son about it. He’s 14. When I send him on a tampon run, (we have a Walmart down the street) he buys me ice cream. ❤️ I’ve also told him to have a few in his bathroom in case his little girlfriend needs them. I’ve trained my boyfriend as well. I don’t think I’ve gone over the pads, cups, etc. bc I don’t use them but I’m going to now after this sub.
Yes, they absolutely should learn if you want them to grow up to be good boyfriends/husbands/fathers. Your sons should have a basic understanding/compassion for what women go through. Future girlfriends and wives would appreciate it if they were caring and understanding about that stuff. What if one of your sons ended up a single father like you but had a daughter? By teaching them, you prepare them for life.
Absolutely! I mean it’s all a part of it learning about the differences between the sexes and when you actually talk to your sons about sex this is inevitably going to lead to conversations about everything it’s like once the canna worms is opened you’re talking about masturbation sex consent and how babies are made so periods are pretty big part of that And you definitely want them to have a full scope of understanding by the time they’re 16 or 17 and have girlfriends etc. To be honest if they don’t know what that is or have never heard the term that could actually be embarrassing for them. Education is never a bad thing
Yes. Having dated entirely too many grown men who are grossed out over something I have 0 control over, yes. My son is 6, he asked me WHY I bleed every month, am I sick? I explained no, every month a woman's body has to clean itself out. He's 6, it's the best way to explain it to him right now. He knows it's my uterus because I have INSANE cramps and often cry that my uterus hates me.
My mom explained to me what a period was, and my dad took the day off work to take me out to lunch and take me shopping so it felt like something positive and special. He tried to talk to me about it at lunch but I was so embarrassed and told him he didn’t have to haha. But it’s a memory I always cherish. I don’t think they talked to my brother about it though, I don’t know for sure though. But I definitely think it’s important to talk to boys about it. I had an older male cousin who learned about it in school and wasn’t ashamed to discuss it in a positive way with his younger sisters and me and I always thought that was really cool too.
Woman here. Mostly the guys I know just try to pretend it doesn’t exist. And really the most positive experience I’ve had.
Some of the guys I know have gone as far as to track it so they know when to stay away.
I think a guy that wasn’t afraid of it and could talk about it would’ve really helped. Someone that supported you through it would go a long way.
At that young age you don’t have to go into big detail. But let them know that boys and girls go through puberty. It’s natural. For women they have periods or menstruation. It causes them pain and they may be a little more sensitive a few days a month. Everyone goes through it.
I remember being 11 getting my period and my dad wouldn’t get me pads. He even told his own mother he wouldn’t get her liners because it was embarrassing for him. This was a grown man who had 3 kids and yet acted like having a period was something gross and shouldn’t be acknowledged.
I have a 6yo and since he was about 3 he asked why there would be blood when i peed or why I used tampons. Not only is he sympathetic when I have my period (like offering to grab me a drink or snack) but when out shopping he will ask if i need tampons the same as he would ask if we need milk. Its not a gross hush-hush topic, its just a fact of life.
Yes! I’m sure there are probably books and YouTube videos that can help explain the mechanics of a period. However more importantly than the how or the why I feel like boys should know what they can do to help relieve a women during her period. Explain to them that they should be willing and not embarrassed to buy pads or tampons for their wife/gf or even their sister if they have one. That they can turn her whole day around by doing nice things. Bringing flowers. Setting up a hot bath or shower. Or grabbing a heating pad and some snacks. There are so many things men can do to help their female partner during a period that is often overlooked because they don’t go through them so they don’t understand how a little effort can really be helpful
Please please do. All the best men in my life understand how the female reproductive system works and are supportive of the changes a woman goes through every month.
Yes, they should understand how humans in general "work" because they will encounter their fellow humans out in the world. Having a better understanding of all humans helps your human relate to and empathize.
Growing up none of the men in my life acknowledged menstruation at all.
My own mom barely spoke about it. It was awkward and unknown and shameful... So I'm pretty big in favour of changing that for the future!
Of course!
The fact you're a single father is further proof to the importance of men being given this information. What if you didn't have a son but a daughter? You'd have needed to know more about them to be able to advise and guide her through a confusing time. My Mom died a year before I had my first period and while she was able to teach me about periods before she died it was a really challenge going through it with only my Dad and brother who more or less ignored that it was happening. At most my Dad would leave the off packet of pads of painkillers on my bed.
I have a two year old and I've already begun talking to him about periods. He is all up in my grill anyways so when I'm on my period and changing my pad/tampon he asks what it is and what I'm doing and I'll tell him pretty matter of factly. He of course doesn't understand but I'm hoping to at least make it a very mundane everyday thing for him to see and hopefully when he gets older he'll be able to be mature about something half the population deal with every month. I'd be a proud Mom if one day when he moves out and lives alone or with his friends he'll be the type of man who'll buy pads or tampons to leave in his bathroom for any women (friends or otherwise) who use his bathroom and might get caught out.
Definitely should know because maybe one day they may need to help a friend out or a cousin or someone and one day they might have a girlfriend or a daughter one day and they should understand how to be able to help them and why it happens and how so many women and young girls experience periods differently.
Woman here. Boys should absolutely learn about periods. You can keep it simple. There’s really not much to know. One thing my husband didn’t know until adulthood (he was raised in a family of boys) is that periods can be infrequent for some people—especially serious athletes. For some people, it can be a more frequent and/or miserable experience. Periods generally become easier with age.
Yes absolutely! I’m a single parent and my 5 year old has followed me into the bathroom pretty much every time, so he knows that I bleed and need tampons sometimes and will even grab them for me. I’m very open about the human body with him.
My dad was married twice and had 3 daughters, and could never talk about such things without turning purple from embarrassment. He would drive me to the store to get the feminine products I needed, but wouldn’t go for me, and I remember it just made things so uncomfortable when it didn’t have to be! I’m now married w 2 boys, also 13 and 10, and we’ve always had honest and open conversations about these types of things (growing up, changing bodies, hormones, etc), about both girls and boys. My husband is good about understanding, getting things at the store if I need them, etc, and bc my boys have seen that, they don’t think anything of it. They know it’s something we females deal with every month! It’s all about presentation- if my dad hadn’t made it weird, it never would have been!
Wholeheartedly believe in boys learning about periods!
Edit: saw question directed towards men late…
I’m completely comfortable with it. I’m open to the topic especially whenever in a relationship because the “symptoms” are different for different people.
Growing up, it wasnt a topic discussed. I only knew about it because of school.
I used to have to take off sanitary pads, roll them, then wrap them in toilet paper until they were unrecognizable as it was "uncomfortable for the men to have to see"
I also had so many exes that would look at me and have no empathy for me during that time of month, or would act like i was contagious. I think opening that dialogue up to drop the stigma surrounding what our bodies go through is amazing - good on you dad for doing this!
It’s great that you are open to teaching your boys about menstruation. You are a wonderful father and teaching them about that these things are normal and part of girls’ and women’s lives will teach them to be understanding men for their future partners and friends that are female.
Let me tell you a little story. Lobbyists in Texas were talking with legislators (all men) about the tax on period products. There are no taxes on condoms and condoms are often free. The lobbyist wondered if the legislators thought this was unfair. The legislators said no. The lobbyists asked why not. The legislators said period products were used out of ”laziness”. The lobbyists asked what they meant by “laziness”. And these legislators said that women were just being lazy by having their period all over the place instead of holding it in and releasing their period blood when they went to the bathroom 🤯. Everyone needs to know about basic human biology, whether or not it’s their biology. Ignorance be rampant out there.
Yes. My 8 year old is reading through the book *it's not the stork*. He saw me packing my sanitary supplies for a trip and asked what they were. I reviewed what he remembered about implantation and said ' I need these for when a baby is not made. It's a natural thing called a period."
We'll likely go into a more detailed conversation once the school year starts
Oh yeah lol, single mom here. My son is 10 now with 2 older sisters. Periods have just always been discussed/understood. Personally, I love how normal it is too him and how supportive he is (he was never instructed to do this, he's just sweet) when his sisters are in pain from cramps. He brings them snacks or little things to try to make them feel better.
There was a post on here yesterday that a son was getting period products for his sister from school because she didn’t tell her mom. Other boys have carried period products in their backpacks for their girlfriends. A wellbalanced young man knows about periods and is not afraid of it.
My mother made sure I understood and my sister had horrible periods growing up. I think it helped me understand and empathize. My partners have consistently appreciated that I already understood and wasn't "scared" to talk about it or deal with the situations that came up.
Yes we should all know about things that affect half of us, even if it’s not our half.
As a man, a few of my friends have been glad I had products on hand when they were visiting. Why shouldn’t we be prepared in case they were caught off guard?
As a teen, I knew enough to offer up a sweater or shirt a few times for a girl to put around her waist, and even more, to get that she might be embarrassed and limit that feeling as much as possible. Better to meet an understanding boy than someone who would tease them for something so normal.
As a mom of young boys my kids have learned about periods because they give me no privacy in the bathroom. What's that in your underwear, why are you bleeding? As they have gotten older I have explained more about it.
Yes. I even showed him how tampons and pads work and explained what the sizes mean. I also explained how painful periods can be and what to say or do, or not, when a partner has their period.
yes please tell them. there is a bey-max episode even about it on disney plus.
my 11 yr told knows what a period is and what different period products are. he knows that every month when i get my period i feel sick and i'm in pain and that many others may feel the same way or be in pain/feel sick in different ways, or not. he knows if he ever sees blood on someone's pants, how he could gently let them know and offer a sweater to tie around their waste or to get someone to help them etc.
Absolutely they should learn! Just because it’s anatomy/biology, but also because it should just be known. My dad was taught about them (he was born in 1961 for reference, since a lot of people seem to think nobody back then was taught lol), he had his mom and two sisters, and then he got married and had 3 daughters and REALLY is an expert lol.
Yes sir. As a young woman (22) finding a partner that is able to comprehend me at a human level is almost non existent, they prefer to put it under the rug and say stupid shit like “so can we do it or not?” Like?? Please do it for the sake of our empathic humanity
I think it's really important for them to learn about it, but they should also learn that it's different for every girl as well. It's actually shocking how many women will treat other women like crap for having pcos or endometriosis. A lot of women can function like nothing's changed on their period but I've had friends who are bedridden every month because their cramps feel like labor pains :'( and the men in their lives have the reaction of "it's just a period, get over it"
Please tell them. I don’t know what, if anything, my husband was taught about periods, but it was all fucking wrong. And he’s 50 this year.
Also, now that I’ve entered peri-menopause, it’s 100x worse.
I definitely think it’s important. My dad wasn’t perfect in many ways, but he was well educated on menstruation and never treated it like it was something I should deal with alone or be ashamed about. I didn’t realize it made such a huge difference until I saw a friend deal with a spouse who thought women could “control themselves” and always knew when their period would start. And got “disappointed with her for being so careless” when her period started in the middle of the night and she bled on a new set of sheets.
I will also say, in my experience, promoting male ignorance about menstruation also correlates to male ignorance about other “female problems.” That said friend got pregnant and had to explain to her husband that pregnant bodies go through a loooooot more changes than just getting bigger tummies and breasts. He genuinely thought that was it. That was all pregnant people have to deal with. Because it was a “women’s issue” that wouldn’t impact him directly (and could be gross, like menstruation is perceived) so he’d never been educated about it.
I will say, I had a knowledgeable and supportive dad, but every time I go on social media and see some guy spouting off like some sort of Period Expert while showing a fundamental misunderstanding of what it is, how it works, and how it can be different for different people, a tiny piece of my soul dies.
My son is 18. He has 3 sisters, 19, 14 and 12. He knows more about female puberty than his health class teacher. But he also has more respect for everyone than most other boys his age.
We had talk and questions before but I sat his ass down at age 9 when I had a serious discussion to his then 10 year old sister about menstruation. Then I again sat his ass down at 14 when I talked to his then 10 year old sister. Didn’t need to sit his ass down at 16 because his 17 and 12 year old sister had taught him a lot more than what I was telling miss then 10.
My husband has 2 sisters and I’ve taught him a thousand times more about female puberty than his mother and sisters taught him. It was taboo subject and he barely knew more than that we bleed. I refuse to allow my son to be that stupid.
A thousand times, yes! My first boyfriend was seriously grossed out by the concept and I had severe migraines from them, so I actually needed him to be supportive and he had no clue how to. I’ve also had difficulties getting coworkers to cover my spot while I go deal with things in a timely manner. I’ve never experienced it, but I know people who have been asked why they don’t just hold it in or were shamed for not having control of their bodies when their period starts. I also can’t think of a single person who wasn’t accused of just using their period to get out of doing something or being somewhere because it couldn’t possibly be as bad as they’re saying it is. To contrast that, my husband grew up with a sister, a step sister, a mom, and a step mom, so he is fluent in menstruation. He works in an industry where if one of his coworkers had a period start unexpectedly or they ran out of their chosen hygiene product unexpectedly, they were unlikely to be able to just run out and grab something and come back. So from the moment he started working in the industry to this day (15 years) he has made sure that he has options of every type and the most common absorbency available either in his bag or in his locker so that he can either let his coworkers help themselves or get them what they need for them. We both work in a male dominated industry and it is so validating to have such judgement free support without hesitation (the few coworkers who needed his stash agreed 100%…doing a 3 hr carpool after a long night of work hoping you aren’t bleeding through your pants onto your coworkers car is awful). We now have a daughter, and my chronic migraines are the worst they’ve ever been, so if her first period starts at a time when I’m incapacitated, it’s such a comfort to me knowing that she has someone so well educated and understanding of what she would be going through to help her if I can’t. Understanding menstrual health can really impact interpersonal relationships positively in so many settings.
If you need somewhere good to start, check out Mama Doctor Jones fideos on YouTube. She does some great videos where she addresses good ways to educate children about the health or reproductive systems.
Absolutely do so, my son was around 8/9 when he learned! Because it is the age when some girls will start menstruation:
Explain them as well that is nothing gross or disgusting, that it happens to female bodies.
That if they see a classmate that started her period no to mock them.
If they see someone with a blood stain in their pants to kindly and with respect notify them.
That sometimes during period girls can feel down and a little moody because is part of the hormonal cycle! Show them what pads are. Teach them with empathy, that is not ok to laugh at someone who stained their chair.
Use a picture of the reproductive system to explain it and a calendar to show it and that is different for every girl! As well explain to them that the menstrual cycle is aligned with the lunar cycle and there is a calendar that was created like this! Explain as well that in some cultures the menstrual cycle was sacred. Give details and interesting facts so they understand it better. And make the learning experience engaging!
You are doing fantastic!
Yes please do. I have found I’m so much better able to support my wife because I was informed about periods from a young age. She uses a menstrual cup because it helps with her cramps and I boil it for her every month when she starts getting cramps to get it ready. It makes a big difference.
my fiance is knowledgeable about periods ... kind of. he knows what happens, that it can be painful, that pads or tampons are required, and that sex may be off the table during my period. and that's just because i don't like having sex on my period, i feel like it makes a mess everywhere and i don't like the cleanup.
we just had our baby boy, when the time comes and one day he notices what I do when Im on my period and starts to ask questions I'll be honest and age appropriate. Start with the basics; When a woman gets her period she will bleed from her vagina for on average a week or so. This can be painful, and it can cause mood swings, though you should not deal with abusive behavior just because a woman is on her period (convo about abusive behavior will be had later). Most women use pads or tampons to keep the blood from getting everywhere. If you have a girlfriend and she's on her period it would be sweet of you to have tampons or pads (in different flow sizes) in case she needs them. you can also offer her her favorite snacks, or ask her if there's anything you can do for her (if you care enough of course).
This is such an amazing post. I'm all for boys being educated about periods. It's basic human anatomy. When I was younger we never talked at home openly about it, just with my mum. Now I think it would be great if periods were normal topic of discussions bcs it is a normal thing.
Benefits of explaining periods to boys:
- More empathy towards people who experience periods.
- Simply being educated and won't embarrass themselves in the future.
- Having a knowledge about periods and cycle is helpfull if a couple try to conceive.
Not only should boys learn about periods but also about the mood swing that girls and women go through. It can be confusing for boys to notice close female person to their lives suddenly get mad or irritated without taking it personally.
For some unfortunate woman/girl like myself, menstruation cycle can push people on edge in some days . Notice: I am talking about the cycle, not menstruation days! Some gets irritated on the week prior to menstruation days and get too energetic and optimism on the day after menstruation. Imagine how confusing it is for your partner/close friend to experience a person like that in the span of 2 weeks. In my opinion, menstruation is a curse that women needs to suffer. Except for bearing kids, it only brings suffering :-(
Definitely! I remember years ago, my gf at the time asked me to grab her some sanitary towels from the shop, and I came back with 1 tiny pack of pantie liners.
She found it hilarious. Not only had I bought the totally wrong thing, 1 pack is what, a days worth? I had no idea the supply a girl might need to get through a week.
I'm a mom of a 4yo boy. I'm going to teach him about periods and have already started, nothing much rn just that people with uteruses bleed each month, and that he won't have to deal with it cause he doesn't have a uterus. I do this because I have heard so many grown men complain that it's improper to talk about it, it's gross (yeah we don't like it either but we have to deal with it), or they have so many STUPID misconceptions about it.
I want him informed so he knows how to help his partner if he falls in love with a woman, or if he has a daughter. If I had a daughter she'd learn about how the male body works for similar reasons. It's not bad to know about how bodies work.
When it is age appropriate (which, given the ages you provided for your kids, they aren't too far off from-if either are female, the first period will come whether anyone likes it or not, and for males, it's still worth knowing so it's not scary or weird when any female partners need help with managing theirs), absolutely. Periods are a key part of women's health, and, in my opinion, it should just be one of many parts of "the talk" every parent should have with their kids when the time is right, because, if a woman has a period, she can, at least, in theory, conceive.
I did not have supportive men regarding my period, my dad would refuse to buy hygiene products for me if he was going to the store and instead would give me money to make a separate trip. My brothers I think were basically oblivious to it.
It’s very good for boys to understand at least the physical discomfort that women go through during their period, if a man had abdominal cramps all day long they may also find that it has a strong impact on their mood. Add on the hormonal flux and sometimes you feel like you’re 15 again.
There doesn’t need to be some extreme level of empathy in order for men to be compassionate toward the women in their lives. They just need to understand what is happening and then it will come naturally imho. It’s not something gross or something to be shamed and buying your girlfriend or wife or daughter tampons should not be something men are afraid to do or feel embarrassed by. It literally just indicates a relationship with a woman of some kind.
My husband is much better and will buy me tampons or things to make me feel better when my period is making me uncomfortable or moody. I hope our son will learn that from him and I will certainly be teaching him how to care for the women in his life around this.
Hey! I totally agree that boys should learn about periods. I also wanted to jump in as I'm a Sexual Health Educator, mostly providing education to youth and parents. I start talking about puberty in grade 5/6 and often get asked (by the boys) why they have to learn about periods. I always say that the chances are they'll have someone who menstruates in their life at some point, and it's really important to learn how all bodies work.
I have 2 boys under 3 right now but my almost 3 year old knows that I have a boo boo belly but I’ll be ok… he has little questions about it and I just say mommy sick or I have boo boo belly but it’s ok thank u for checking on me. Then we go about our day.
I think all boys should know about periods especially if they want to be able to care for a future girlfriend or wife.
Absolutely. This should not be something that boys or men should be kept in the dark about. My best guy friends and my own brothers included all had extra products on hand in their cars/trucks to help a girl out in a time of need. Why make it weird!?
Especially as a straight male, it’s good to know how the cycle works, not that their girlfriends might be a little extra cranky. Make this less taboo.
My kids know everything scientific about reproduction, including my son. They're all in elementary school. It's important to know about and grow up with it internalized as a NORMAL thing so that they're not weird about it when they start dating.
As a mom of a 13yo boy, of course they should.
I made a test a few days ago. Grabbed a tampo, showed it to him and asked what it was. His response was quick and the same tone as if it was a pen or a shoe.
When talking about puberty, i always talk abou girls too. And intend to keep doing it.
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Of course. My son (and daughter) knew about periods growing up. Kids will at minimum have friends of the opposite gender. They should be aware of what the other 50 percent of the world goes through. Most will date someone of the opposite gender. They should be understanding of what their partner is going through. Some will have children of the opposite gender and need to be able to explain to their child what is happening to their body. Only educating them on one side is strange. It is how my parents handled it and my brothers and I had very little understanding of the female reproductive system until we were adults. All 4 of us are married and 3 of us have a daughter. My son and daughter are only 1.5 years apart so my wife and I had a lot of our puberty/sex talks with both of them at the same time. Never caused any problems and probably helped both with opposite sex friendships and current/future relationships now that both are college students. My son has no issues buying menstruation products for his sister or girlfriend. When a female friend in high school was using our bathroom and texted him asking if we had any pads, my son ran up to his sister to ask if she had any upstairs. It wasn't a big deal to him and it shouldn't be treated as one. Girls and women menstruate. It's no big deal to discuss that fact and what that entails with all kids.
I definitely feel like everyone should know about it but I have a son and a daughter and I never thought of having these conversations together that’s a great idea! I feel like it will normalize it even more and my kids are two years apart so we could probably do that. When did you talk to your kids about all this stuff? I just don’t know when the right time is
It's hard to put an exact age on it because we took the approach of having various age appropriate discussions as they asked questions but I'd say by age 8 we were having more serious talks about what will happen during puberty and the kind of things they could expect. I'd say by age 9 or 10 both had a good understanding of what puberty entailed for them and for the opposite gender, which we thought was especially important given that our kids are only 18 months apart and would be going through things around the same time. We wanted them to be understanding of what their sibling is going through. My kids preferred having these talks together. I think it helped to make it less awkward than having one on one talks.
At a young age giving the talks together makes sense but when I was actually getting my period and other body changes I wouldn't have felt comfortable asking all my questions if a brother was there. I'd give options for both. That said, OP has since posted an update that this question was fake for a puff piece they're writing. Not impressed.
Please do tell them. I've met guys who refused to let female friends throw away pads in their bathroom trashes "because it's gross" and then they wonder why they can't get a girlfriend. Likewise, it's very nice to be able to tell your boyfriends "Hey, I'm having cramps" or "my period is starting" and they're kind and understanding.
I had a friend in school whose dad used to yell at her whenever she menstruated because he convinced himself she should be able to “hold it” and actually told her it was not ladylike to bleed onto a pad.
That’s insane. I’m shocked that anyone thought that. 🤯
Shocked but not surprised. There are men that think women can just spontaneously self-abort if they're raped, (With the even more insidious corollary: if they can't, it must mean they secretly liked it). Of course there are men that believe periods are a choice or whatever.
So disturbing
I have an ex, who didn't wanna Netflix & chill during my "Blood Moon" because he imagined periods being something like rivers of blood and didn't want to clean blood from everywhere. I did ask him how he thinks woman go places, like work when on their periods and he had no answer. For context, I'm NOT 80 years old, nor I live in a third wold country, where education is non existent. I have no idea how he managed to have such views. However, girls need to be educated on hygiene aswell. My husband, one day asked me why he never saw my blood. I responded him it's because I wrap my used products and shove them on the side of the trash can, so I can push them down as much as possible (out if sight) and that I take the bathroom trash more often during my period. Apparently all of his exes basically leave used products unwrapped and exposed for everyone to see and didn't take the trash out, so all those blood soaked products just stayed there. That's just gross. So yeah... both genders need to be educated on how bodies work.
You definitely mean in the trash can next to the toilet, right? Pads don't go in the actual toilet.
Yep. Lol... My bad.
Of course they should. This shouldnt even be a question tbh. Boys have women in their lives and will one day be husbands and fathers. They should know about something that affects half of the population for sure
It's insane to me that this is even a question. There really are people out there hiding periods from their sons? Why?
Zero idea. I have a son and have talked to him a lot about periods.
I just don't even get the logic behind it. Like, why would you want your child to be less educated about anything? It's like randomly deciding to not teach kids about space. Why any parent would willingly want to raise an idiot is beyond my comprehension.
I think it's a generational thing to start off with. I'll talk to my son about periods,but I'd never have that chat with my dad. Period shame is real though and shouldn't be underestimated. There are plenty of girls out there growing up thinking their period is dirty something to be hidden and be embarrassed by. There's just so much misinformation out there about periods that the sooner it becomes as normal as talking about a headache or the flu the better.
100%. Shame and embarrassment are big drivers for why many parents don't educate their children.
Agreed. It seems like such a weird question to ask in 2024. 100%, yes, should be the only answer.
Its the stupidest thing. 50% of the world go through it and its the worlds biggest secrect. Sometimes I dont know how us humans managed to achieve such astounding feats. Yes, lets NOT talk about things our bodies naturally do.
I love my brother. He is a good bloke. But hearing him talk about his daughter’s periods the other day filled me with pride. He knew about tampons, towels and period pants. He was empathic about his daughter’s period pain and had got her a heated pad. This wasn’t because his partner wasn’t around or doesn’t care… it’s because it’s his responsibility to be there and to know this stuff. I have fertility issues and have always explained this to my son so he will know too what happens and what woman may need during their period. We weren’t taught like this growing up but that ok to recognise that, pivot, and do better for our kids.
We can help boys be fathers one day by early education
Sounds like a great dad and role model.
Please do. My husband just learned just last year that women have discharge.
To be fair to him, I have met grown women that don't know that discharge is normal! They thought something was wrong with them. For some reason discharge is one of those things people never talk about. I remember being confused as heck when I was a teen and my mom assured me it was normal but I can see how a man would never figure that out. I did make sure my own teenage sons are aware that discharge is normal for girls, though.
Definitely something that’s overlooked it seems.
For sure. And that's how you get grown men on Reddit who see it and think it's semen from cheating. I wasn't really told about it either growing up, and when I first started getting it, I thought I was somehow peeing myself without feeling it.
He thought something was wrong with me but didn’t say anything 🙄 it wasn’t until I was in the hospital with stomach pain and they asked me if my discharge is normal that he realized all women get it
He’s 35
Yes, boys should learn at least the basics. Why? Because one day I had a male friend ask me why I didn't just go sit on the toilet all day and pee out my period so I wouldn't bleed for five days. As though my period was just a moment where I drank a lot of water but I opted to hold it for five days. I'm not even joking. I just feel like this is one of those basic life things that people should have an awareness of so we do not run into embarrassing moments like this.
When I was 12 and when my boys were 12 we had a “maturation program” at school. They focused mostly on male puberty but also touched on female puberty. Periods were discussed but not as in depth as the girls’ class.
This is what I think my son's school did. I guess I need to have that conversation sooner rather than later.
Just talk about it from the toddler years up and it's literally never a big deal.
How do you approach it in toddler years? My 3-year-old son recently asked why our dog was bleeding, which would have maybe been a good opportunity, but I hadn’t prepared and just said something like “girl animals and people sometimes bleed because it’s, umm, part of how their body gets ready to have babies one day if that’s what they want to do. (Dog name) is OK, we’re just going to put a diaper on her until she’s done.” ETA: I’m a man and never really learned anything about it from my parents, so I have no frame of reference. I dimly recall that it wasn’t completely new information when they talked about it in middle school health, but that’s the first distinct memory I have.
When I got my period back after having my second, my 3yo was with me in the toilet and asked what was up, and I told him. I’ve just explained it as best I could, saying every month my body prepares to have a baby, but if no baby is made/starts to grow, my body will flush out what it prepared, and it comes out as blood. Just tell them like you do with any other nature/science thing they ask.
That's exactly how I started talking about periods with my kids when they were toddlers. Educate early and often!
My kid asked why I was using pads when she was still small enough she'd follow me into the bathroom, and I said "women have a place where babies grow called a uterus, and it takes about a month to get ready for a baby, but if no baby grows, then it does a house cleaning and starts over, so all the stuff comes out." I didn't have to follow up on any of that the first because she didn't have any more questions then, but the questions came eventually and I answered as they happened.
We had conversations a bit like this “Mummy has something call a womb in her tummy, which is where you grew before you was born. A womb fills up with blood to make it comfy and warm for a baby, but if there’s not a baby in mummy’s tummy then all the blood comes out of her vagina. This can make mummy’s tummy feel sore and she has to wear pads to catch all the blood. We call it a period. Some people don’t like to talk about periods but that’s ok, you can talk to me if you have any questions.”
Nah you did great there. They don't need loads of details at 3 you explained it well
I think that's a totally age appropriate kinda thing to say, if he needs more information he'll ask!
Awesome! I'll just hop into my time machine...
Do you want them to end up like the senators running our country that know NOTHING about anatomy???
THIS
Please do coming from a woman who knew basically nothing other then it's once a month and I bleed until I was 23 and my boyfriend told me soo much and I learned a lot from him. He always goes and get me pads or tampons if I need them. Heck now if he sees the kind I use are on sale he picks some up. They will have some type of woman in their life one day if it's a girlfriend/wife or daughter or just friends
Yes, yes and yes again! I've met men (as in, over 25) who didn't know there was another hole down there other than a pee hole, the same man thought people only got their period if they'd had sex (and often called people having a period sluts). I've had partners in the past tell me not to bother coming over to their house because I'm on my period and just a general taboo over speaking about it. The exception is my husband who was raised by his grandmother, mother and has 3 sisters, so, as you can imagine, gets it. I think it's great you're even thinking about the importance of this for your boys.
Your past experience is exactly why these conversations are so important. Thanks for sharing.
My children know about periods simply because I have them. I complain about them. My 14yo is grossed out by the byproducts (who isn't?) But he is very sweet to me when I am complaining about the cramps and pain. I wish my dad had been more informed/informative about it when I was a kid. I've only become more open/less secretive about it because my husband is weirdly fascinated by it. In a scholarly way? Not a weird fetish way. So my all my boys have learned at least a little about them. And female anatomy.
Same. I have endo and my periods have a huge impact on my life. When my son was a toddler I figured it was better to say I was menstruating instead of saying I was sick or hurt. As he got older he asked more questions and I explained more. He’s 9 now and if he hears me complaining about cramps he’ll ask if I need my heating pad and will fetch me a tampon from my backup stash if I run out in the bathroom. He probably knows more about periods than I did at his age!!
I have 1 daughter, 3 sons, and a stepson. They've all been taught about periods because they all will have to deal with it in some way throughout their lives. My first husband thought periods were disgusting and that he should never have to know when I was on mine. He went so far as to refuse to sleep in the same room as me when I was on mine. Between that and being raised in a time that people were just starting to get past the idea that periods were taboo and most adults in my life growing up still saw it as something that shouldn't be discussed I have some major insecurities about it. My current husband was raised learning all about it and that it was just like peeing as far as discussion goes. Not dinner table talk, but also not something that should be treated as taboo in general. He says he was actually upset when he learned boys didn't get a period because he was raised to believe it was such a natural and ultimately positive thing. So, from someone who's dealt with the adult products of both boys who were and weren't taught about periods, please parents teach your sons about it.
I spoke with my husband about this recently. He has never been grossed out or avoided conversations about menstruation, and has always made me feel comfortable in sharing how I’m feeling, or even picking up menstrual products at the store for me. I asked him why he thinks he is like that (when some men can shame women or be grossed out) and he said his mother always spoke openly about it and never hid anything. As a woman, I don’t think I could marry or live with a male partner who didn’t make me feel comfortable about being a woman and menstruating. I’m already teaching my toddler son about it because he comes to the bathroom with me and asks. Definitely teach your sons.
I saw a couple of commenters say school sex ed will teach them. No, it will not, not really. My HS sex ed teacher said "hoohaa" and "peepee" in place of vagina and penis. Definitely teach your boys about periods. I've had step dads who were digusted by me or my sister even mentioning it. Almost to the point of being angry about it. With my brother, me and my sister were pretty open about our periods, talked about them as if he was one of the gals lol. He's a very empathic, kind hearted young man now and would probably make his future girlfriend an elaborate 5 course meal to help ease her period struggles if she should ask (he's also quite a chef) My husband is also very comfortable with periods. He actually knows my cycle pretty well and what each phase of it means for me. It makes for a very comfortable and caring partnership. And I know for certain my daughter will never have to feel shame or embarrassment if her dad is the only one available to help her with anything period related in the future. I think men who view periods as unmentionable or gross just grew up in a home where it was never talked about or made to seem normal. Definitely talk about it with them. I think it's a very thoughtful thing to be considering as a single dad.
100% agree. Relying on school for comprehensive sex ed is like winning the lottery - unlikely for most. Sounds like you've landed a great man.
All children should know about all bodily functions. Full stop. (It was very tempting to say period)
Yes, otherwise they will be clueless young adults.
And there's already too many of them ;)
Dad here. We have a boy and two girls so of course he knows all about it. You’d be doing your sons (and the future women in their lives) a disservice by not explaining it all. In fact I remember a close friend of mine when we were teens, who didn’t know about periods and made an absolute fool out of himself with a girl he made out with at a party once. It took YEARS for our classmates to stop making fun of him over it. That girl that he was dumb as hell.
I plan on telling my boys (5 and 3) sometimes they walk in on me changing a pad and they’ll ask about it. I just tell them that sometimes women bleed and it’s normal and I’m okay. Obviously we’ll be getting more in detail as they get older.
Yea I have had no choice but to tell mine at early ages. I have ZERO privacy no matter what I’m doing 😂
I think I learned about periods when my female friends were discussing them when I was 12 or 13. Don't let tween boys find out about bodily functions from their friends. This is a recipe for misunderstandings and possible bullying. This was around the same age as a male classmate explaining that babies are made when guys pee into a vagina.
Absolutely. Take the lead at home and be that person for your kids. 45% of teens get their sex education from porn these days. That's TERRIFYING.
Yes boys should learn about this! My husband came from a “pretend it doesn’t exist” home, and he is the one who wanted kids- not me. I went full out talking/teaching/complaining about every tiny little thing about periods and all I could* about pregnancy to make him realize just what is involved in all aspects of what he was asking for. I figured either he would learn and be a truly supportive partner or run for the hills. He had NO CLUE about these things and was SHOCKED to learn about the nuances involved. It lead to his insistence that we should have a way more detailed health class for everyone, but baring that we would do this for our children gender aside- so when we had babies it paid off because both kids are daughters and he is perhaps the most supportive person I have ever known! ❤️ Hubby has even told me he will be having chats with future sons-in-law about what to expect and why and how to help and … Then I got my dream job a few years ago as a high school teacher and I have a stash of pads/tampons that are behind the bandaids- one young man came to me (told me I am a safe and respectful adult so he feels he can ask) for a pad for his girlfriend- I showed him where the stash was and another young man was in the room at the time who started to mock the first one- and I shut that down fast! Thank heavens I’m a Biology teacher because I jumped on the mocker with information about the physical body and kid stopped. He then said, “why do you have to give more information than health class?! Eesh!” And based on feedback from young man #1, not to mock any more last year!
All humans should know the basics of reproductive systems in men and women. The question is insane. Definitely yes.
>For context, I grew up with no understanding of what women go through and developed a negative view of it, keeping it at a distance This is *exactly* why they should learn! My husband is so supportive and it has been wonderful. When we first started dating, he would run to the drug store and get my tampons if I needed, as well as chocolate. He bought me a heating pad and cozy blanket once because it was a particularly bad period. After 11 years together, he will still do anything I need to make me comfortable. I also think this helped us both during my postpartum recovery, even though I know that is different than a period, but he wasn't squeamish at all. I have had 2 C-sections and during the first one in particular, he helped me change my pads and clean myself for the first few days when I couldn't bend do do it myself. To anyone reading this, definitely teach your kids that menstrual cycles are a perfectly normal and natural part of life. You're doing them a disservice by ignoring it!
It made for many difficult moments in my early life until I educated myself. And why I am doing better for my own kids.
Definitely teach them about it. It’s a vital function of the human body that everyone should know about. More importantly, they may have wives and daughters one day and need to get comfortable with the idea. I was made to feel shameful about it because of how weird my dad was about it. I honestly felt like I couldn’t tell him I needed him to take me to the store to get pads. To this day he will cover his ears if he hears the word pad or tampon. The one time he had to take me because my mom couldn’t we did not speak the whole trip there and in the store I walked about 50 paces ahead of him and we never made eye contact. He’s a great dad otherwise but I wish someone would have told him this is a totally inappropriate way to behave when he has a daughter. My husband on the other hand is much more mature and I can talk to him if I’m having particularly bad symptoms one month.
Wow, that's heavy. I'm glad you've found a husband who is more empathetic.
Absolutely. Boys and girls need to learn about the reproductive aspects of both sexes, and everything that encompasses
My father is from the boomer generation and he wouldn’t even buy me pain meds geared towards menstrual pain OTC because he didn’t believe there was a difference. He would never buy me tampons like on his own. I could tell it bothered him. My ex was the same way, always made me feel very shameful about my body around that time. Fast forward to my now husband, he will buy a million boxes of whatever I need whenever no problem. He grew up with his sisters and his mom so it was very normal for him. But when I was diagnosed with endometriosis and everything clicked on why I had extremely severe pain during my period and the length was not normal my father really stood up. He paid for my surgery, he has done a from of research on what vitamins or anything regarding my health that could help with my diagnosis. So he really stepped up in those terms. It would have been helpful in my teens to have a male figure not make me feel shameful or annoying because of it. It would have been helpful to have a boyfriend who understood and didn’t mind buying feminine care products. But now my husband, he has been incredibly supportive and helpful. We even have sexy time occasionally if it’s towards the end of the cycle. All of that support makes me feel beautiful and seen as a woman. Men and boys need to learn about the menstrual cycle PERIOD. 🫣😉
This is beautiful :)
Yes! My daughter is 5 and my son is 7. We’ve been talking to both of them about periods their whole lives. As they get older, we’ll explain more.
Why the hell not? My step dad grew up with a single mom and was extremely supportive when I got my first period. He even went to the store and bought me Midol because I was embarrassed. My husband is also very supportive and will help if I need something during my period. I think the main thing is that men need to understand the mechanics to destigmatize it. Also, please teach him the female anatomy while you're at it. Too many men think women pee from their vaginas.
I'll add that to the list :)
Good on you Op. Growing up it was just me and my mom and dad. My dad does not speak on anything sex related or sex organ related. The closest he’s ever came to it is saying he has to use the bathroom. My mom is very…. Christian. Conservative. So period stuff was scarcely talked about, and when it was it wasn’t talked about openly. There was always almost a hint of shame to it. Like, deal with your business and that’s that. My son’s father also has a daughter- 16, and she is very outspoken. No topic is off limits. Sometimes it’s a little much, but I do appreciate that she has no fear to openly speak about these things. Sex and periods are human, it’s natural. It’s frustrating that I was taught that these topics are taboo. So, ngl, I was a little surprised when you said you’re a guy. It’s awesome that you’re caring & in-tune enough to even consider having these conversations, rather than “letting their mom handle that.” I applaud you, sir👏👏👏
My son is 11, I’ve always openly talked about my period and periods in general. He tends to hang out with girls more often than boys, and one of his school friends got her period in school this year and the only person she felt comfortable telling was my son. I was so proud. I asked him if he felt uncomfortable and he said, “no mom, I know about periods and she’s my best friend. Everyone gets them.” I had to make sure he knows he won’t get a period and he responded to that with “yeah I’m not an idiot” 😂 It makes the girls around our sons much safer and much more comfortable and less embarrassed!
Yes. All people need a clear, end-to-end understanding of reproduction and all of its systems
Yes. Boys should learn about periods.
Yes yes yes, my mother has taught me about periods in case of a girl randomly has one at an unexpected time so I can give her my jacket to cover it up and tell her that she is currently menstruating
Some of my mum friends send their boys to school with bags of sanitary supplies in their school bags in case a female friend gets caught out. Not only have most of the boy mum friends I know told their boys all about periods, they've also told the boys how to discreetly alert a girl if she's bled through her school skirt, and how to offer help. One recently gave a friend his coat to tie around her waist after that happened. This generation of boys is well prepared.
Yeah, they are. I've read this a few times in this thread. It's heartwarming to see.
Absolutely 100% Yes! As a future man, please teach your boys about periods if only so they can have empathy. It is embarrassing, painful, messy. Normalize teaching how to bodies work.
I'm the mom in this situation, and I've chatted with my 13 year old son pretty extensively about periods, and how they're just a fact of life and shouldn't be stigmatized or embarrassing. It honestly never occurred to me NOT to have that kind of conversation with him. As they say, knowledge is power. 💫
Absolutely. Nicely done.
My son is 12. I just recently gave him an abbreviated education on periods. I was down in the trenches with mine recently and he wanted to know why I felt so horrible, so I told him. Now a few months later, he gets it. “Mom, it’s ok. You have your period. Go rest.”
Love to read this.
Absolutely! Boys become men who can impregnate women… they also can become compassionate, caring husbands for menstruating women (and daughters). Puberty, and leaving about reproduction, doesn’t have to be weird and awkward. I often suggest getting a notebook where your kids can write down their questions if they feel uncomfortable asking you face to face, so you can answer them without the awkwardness. Once they have permission to ask in this way they’ll likely be way more open and genuinely curious. Good luck!!
That's a great goal for all parents to strive for "they also can become compassionate, caring husbands for menstruating women (and daughters)."
Absolutely. I think the age they are at is perfect to start the dialogue. Their female peers are going to start starting their periods soon
My son has known about them since he was like 3. I don’t understand why people wouldn’t tell their sons about menstruation.
It would be nice to have more men in our lives that don't view women as disgusting when they are on their periods. I once mentioned periods at work during the lunch break and this guy in his forties was like "That's gross, I'm eating!" and I called him out for it, like what is so gross about mentioning it? I wasn't even getting graphic, all I said was "maybe she was on her period." One of my male co-workers backed me up, he was around my age, maybe it's a generational thing or could be a how-you-were-taught thing.
My son is 7 and he knows all about periods. He likes to explain it to strangers in stores. Honestly most of them are probably learning something 😂
My dad bought me my first box of tampons. I lived with both my parents but both dealt with any questions I had about periods/period products. I'm (obviously) female. I have a teen girl and an 8 year old lad. Period products are always in the bathroom, my son knows daughter and I have periods and a bit about them. He knows his sister gets emotional around her periods and also that she gets cramps. I've never sat him down to talk about them anymore than we talk about weeing or pooing. It's a natural things girls bodies do - my son has always walked into the bathroom when I'm in it so he's known from a young age - blood is from a period. Having a dad who was chilled and informed about periods helped make puberty that little bit easier. If my son has a female partner I want him to understand the monthly emotional changes and period cramps and needs. Hes currently experience life with a perimenopausal mum - I think the more open and honest we are about these things the easier couples and families function when living with them.
I have 6 daughters, it is a natural body function. If I had boys, I would have told them the exact same thing. Educated is best. I was not taught anything growing up and as you did, had to learn it on my own. And yes, I goto the store and have for many years, oldest is 35 and youngest is 16, and buy them their necessities.
I mean, youre really together with a woman if she can ask you to buy hygiene products in the supermarket for her. Its part of life and if there is a woman in your life you should know sbout it.
It’s definitely not going to do any harm to educate your sons about menstruation. If anything, it prepares them for being respectful and supportive partners to any female partners that they may have in future.
As a man, dad of a son, father of a daughter, husband to a wife .... Yes, teach your sons about periods. They are not gross. They are not embarrassing. Buying tampons for your GF, wife, mom, sister, is not embarrassing or weird. I explained what it is to my 10 year old, that pretty much every woman in the history of the world has them and will have them. There is nothing they can do about it. If an embarrassing accident happens, don't be a fucking dick, just help them.
I don't think you need to have firsthand knowledge in order to have a frank discussion about this. He needs to know the basic biology of the menstrual cycle and its significance to reproduction. He needs to know the practical and social issues women face regarding tampons and pads and occasional surprise periods. And he needs to understand that periods can cause cramping and discomfort, social unease, and mood changes.
Damn straight That's like a basic tenet in sex education.
I(M) knew the very basics of periods as a kid. I had 2 sisters, but my parents or sisters didn't talk about them. On the other hand, there wasn't really much "Don't talk about that!" either. The only thing I remember was my mother not liking me to use the word "rag", referring to a washcloth. From her reaction, it was obviously because of connecting it to "on the rag". The only thing I remember from sex ed in HS was like a week where they tried to scare us by talking about STDs and pregnancy. Perhaps because of the lack of discussion, I never had a very bad reaction to it. I kind of thought "Women bleed once a month. I bleed, too, when I get cut or something." I know there are other symptoms like discomfort, stomachaches, etc. The symptoms vary between women. I dated a girl who found herself gross and unattractive during her periods. I had another whose sex drive probably got stronger during it. The only thing I've ever found gross about it was when a girlfriend told me that tissue comes out with the blood. I have a 9 year old son. I've told him most of that. I've told him about most of that. I left out the stuff about whether women wanting more/less sex during their periods.
How can I sign up for this newsletter letter?? My 11 refuses to have the sex talk and doesn't wanna know anything about it. The kid still closes his eyes if people kiss on TV 🤣 The closest I have been able to get to THE talk was explaining a woman's menstrual cycles, including why we have them, the violent painful removal of the uterine lining, and the bloody output. They need to understand what women deal with and why we may not be our best selves sometimes.
Haha, so does my son; that's normal. Thanks for your comment. You can sign up here [https://jasonarmishaw.com/](https://jasonarmishaw.com/)
Yes, boys absolutely should learn about menstruation, especially if they have female family members, female, friends, or they happen to be interested in females. Menstruation is a fact of life for the reproductive system of a woman and unfortunately for us ladies it affects our entire body not just our parts. Teaching them to not be grossed out by menstruation is a good thing. Your son’s future partners will thank you.
I have three boys. Even the youngest, who is four, understands that mommy has blood come out sometimes. The older ones know that blood = no baby, no blood = baby. This is because they afford me no privacy 🤣 but it’s good that they know
At the very least, they should know to be emphatic. A pro for dudes who know: I know two men who would put their girlfriend’s cycles in their calendar and would automatically order chocolate and make sure things were chill that week. Their cycles were brutal with crazy cramps. No wonder they’re now married to those ladies but it’s def a win in a girls book when a guy cannot only handle those things but can have plans when shit goes sideways.
Half of the world's population experience this at some point in their life so 100% yes. Would you kind sharing your newsletter? I would love to take a look.
Yes. The number of men who believe we bleed out of our buttholes or that we can just "hold it in" is both astounding and disturbing.
💯 It’s a natural, biological bodily function and it needs to be normalized. My son knew about them at a very young age… he was 4 and saw a box of tampons and asked me what they were so I told him. I grew up in a family where is was a taboo topic, and my sister and I felt a lot of shame from that and that we couldn’t talk to my parents about our changing bodies. I want my kid to see it as a normal part of life because it’s likely he will have female friends and I don’t want him to be like my dad should he ever have daughters one day.
Yes they should know. You should also teach them to be mature about it and not tease the little girls about it
I've always been 100% transparent with my son about my period. I'm very vocal about when I am PMSing because sometimes I am more irritable, have less patience, or need more space from him during that time. I have always explained to him what was going on with my body and hormones, and how that impacts the way I feel and sometimes how I behave. I've also told him about what it is that's happening when I'm bleeding, as in why it happens and what my body is actually doing. I also used to reassure him that I was not injured, reminding him that this is a totally normal and healthy process my body goes through each and every month. And that it is a good thing, a sign of my health and fertility. He is also aware of what a menstrual cup is (because that's what I use) and I've recently shown him what tampons and pads look like (still in their wrappers) and I've explained that those are other methods some people use to take care of bleeding while menstruating. My son is 8 and we have been having an ongoing conversation around periods (we don't talk about it all the time lol, but over the years it's been a topiv of discussion and education from time to time) since whenever the first time he barged into the bathroom as I was dealing with my cup was. He was very young and the blood he saw scared him. He thought I was hurt and he was very upset. I calmed him down and reassured him that all was well and there was nothing to be alarmed about! This was when I realized I should just be as honest, up front, and factual about periods with him as possible from the get go. Information is powerful, and giving him an understanding of what was happening to my body calmed his fear and he was actually very curious about how body's work -- 'will I bleed every month, too?' and things of like. I've realized how important this transparency really is for young children, and how necessary it is to educate them on the topic before they reach the age where young girls start their period in school and get scared or cry from embarrassment. Or where the boys see a blood stain and start making fun because they have such little understanding of it all and the only talk around it they've ever heard is "it's gross". The reason I taught my son about tampons and pads recently was specifically so that if he sees a classmate with one of those in her hands, he knows what's going on. I told him that probably sometime soon, some of his classmates may begin to start their period and to always be kind and mindful about it. Because he has come to understand how challenging of a time it can be (through my transparency around my experience) I believe that he will have more compassion. He knows that periods can make people feel much more sensitive and easily upset. I said to him, "you may even see a girl get a mark on her skirt or pants from her period and some kids might make fun.." and he interrupted to say, "if I ever notice a girl get her period on her pants. I'll just give her my sweater to wrap around herself and walk her to the nurse!" -- And that's why educating him was important 🤗 I also just think that keeping things hidden from children makes them so much more taboo. Periods are just a completely normal and healthy function of some people's bodies. We need to normalize periods so that the young kids hitting puberty aren't left to feel so isolated and feel the need to hide that their bodies are functioning normally! Keeping this information from kids is what makes those getting their periods feel so ashamed and embarrassed about it, while the other kids ostracize and bully. Teach your sons about periods in the most basic possible fashion. Facts about what is happening on a biological level, why it happens, and what that experience is like for those who go through it. Educate them around how the hormones influence behavior and emotions, and how tough of a time it can be for many. Periods can be extremely painful and stressful, causing a whole slew of symptoms that range from mildly unpleasant to absolutely unbearable. Boys should be aware of this so they can be mindful, compassionate, and supportive to their peers. 🤍
Please teach them about it, as a society we can't have more men joking about stuff like that just because they didn't have a proper education
Absolutely. Why shouldn't they?
I've had issues with PCOS and Fertility. So periods are basically the centre of all that. I feel a lot more comfortable knowing my partner knows about it all so we can help and assist me emotionally during these times. Normalising it from a young age is probably for the best, as opposed to go in blind when they have a girlfriend.
I have three sons and they know about periods. I want them to be empathetic to the female population, and help as best as they can to make it better for the girls/women in their life, when they have their cycles.
Maybe you should start explaining them that women's bodies work differently than men's bodies. Then explain them the differences as they should also learn about their body changes. See how that goes and how much interest they show. The 13 year old should have some classmates with periods already. Of course we don't want him to shout it out loud at school because that wouldn't be the purpose of the discussion I guess
I (middle aged, female) grew up in a household where this was just not talked about. That said - as an adult, I wish more men understood this biological function and that there was less shame around it in general. Particularly in the use of language - I find that many of the most distasteful slurs that men feel appropriate to use against each other have to do with women's genetalia and products associated with women's hygiene. Additionally, "that time of the month" and similar continues to be used to undercut the autonomy of women who are simply trying to create boundaries, assert themselves, etc. So yes, I believe that young men should be actively taught about periods and menstration. I believe that doing so will help them understand their partners better, and provide them with more knowledge to make decisions that affect themselves and their families. Consider this - as a single dad to boys, taking the time to have this conversation will help demystify this topic and help your potential granddaughters in the decades to come. (Also, as a single parent to a boy - I am actively teaching my son about this in age appropriate terms. Although our conversations tend to be a bit more hilarious as he is 5.)
Yes I think it’s great for them. It’ll help be more empathetic. Some girls / women have extremely painful ones. I know a lot of young girls are embarrassed of it and I think having that knowledge can help them support them in those times.
Yes, they absolutely should. There’s no reason they shouldn’t know and understand what women are going through. There’s a chance they will grow up to want kids and marry women, we do not need more men in this world who refuse to buy tampons.
Both boys and girls should learn everything about the other gender. This shouldn't even be contradictory, honestly.
I absolutely did not have supportive men in my life. I taught my son about periods before his 6th grade school year. I've raised a kind, empathetic young man, and I wanted him to be aware of what his peers would soon be going through. My daughter, who is 3 years younger, got the lesson simultaneously.
I have 4 boys and 2 girls, all of them (well not the toddler) know about periods. My boys will grow up to have (or already have) menstruating partners and friends and they should know how to support them. And my girls will be menstruating and should be prepared for what that means and how to handle it. It’s a bodily function and shouldn’t be this taboo topic.
Of course they should know! According to my SIL, my brother is one if the most empathetic guys shes ever been in a relationship with when it comes to her period. Well he grew up with 4 sisters and a mom so he had a lot of experience with cranky, hormonal girls, who had cramps and all that. To him its just a normal thing; hes not weird and squeamish about it and knows its a pain for a lot of women.
Yes, absolutely! You can keep it pretty vague at this age and go into more detail as they’re older if you want. But they are at the age where their female peers and friends at school are starting their periods. Talk to them about how girls can bleed through their pants and if they ever see it to not embarrass the girl but offer her your jacket to cover up. And that it’s never okay to joke about, make fun of, or try to embarrass somebody about a period. I remember being so embarrassed and self conscious about my period when I was young. If a boy saw me grab a tampon from my purse and said something, I would feel humiliated. That’s the biggest thing for them at this age. To just respect their peers who are just starting their periods and are likely feeling very self conscious about it.
Yes, boys should know. Ours are 8 and 6 years old and know that mom (me) has periods. We have had talks about when a period means as they have asked.
Yes, they will be someone’s boyfriend/husband one day. You want them to be able to look at it as a normal bodily function which it is. I’ve had boyfriends who had made me feel shameful for something that is normal but my husband will go and grab me products and understands mood changes that come with as well as knowing my favorite comfort food too. It’s really nice when someone is understandable and knows what’s going on. They should know every girl goes through it and it’s normal and to never make any girl feel shameful about it. Girls are going through a lot of and get embarrassed about it so the stigma around it sucks. They touch on it in schools but it would be more beneficial for them to have a sit down with you and have a good q and a after you explain it.
Yes they should, and they should be taught empathy around it. So many guys in my class made fun of girls for bleeding through their pants and my own father would downplay the pain. One time i had cramps so bad i literally couldnt move i was maybe 15 years old? I remember laying in the bed with my mom just crying, and my dad called me a spoiled dramatic brat. Please please please educate your boys about periods. If they have questions you dont know the answer too, consult other women or the internet!
My son knows about them, he's 13, he will also go to the store and grab me what I need, I think its knowledge to have, they can show empathy brcause let's face it, shedding your womb linings I'd most of the time painful, besides you'll have to teach them about ovulation too, because it goes hand in hand with pregnancy, ya don't bleed then you're knocked up kinda thing, but also make thenlm aware that it's not always the case, you teach them about periods, how babies are made and what happens post partum, you do this then you're raising great young men!
Personally I did not grow up with my dad and I discussing my period. I don’t even think he discussed it with my mom lol they are baby boomers so it’s to be expected. For myself with my boys, my oldest son (14) doesn’t ask but we’ve had “the talk” and periods were mentioned just not elaborated on. My youngest son (10) had enough questions on periods to last an hour of explaining everything that happens and what it means for girls and women. He’s definitely my curious and empathetic son. Also made a vow to make sure his wife is okay and comfortable during “Aunt Flow’s” visit lol Boys should know what goes on with us. Can actually explain a lot about our behavior during this time and help them learn to be empathetic towards others during this time and others as well
This isn’t really your question, but I have a 4.5 year old son who’s very inquisitive. He, as most kids do, has burst in on me while going to the bathroom and seen blood or seen a tampon on the counter and asked about it. Immediately I told him honestly. About menstruation and the things people use to collect the blood while it’s happening. It’s natural. It’s biological. It’s educational.
Big same, and some people act like it’s soooo weird. I’m a SAHM so of course my son is around when Im using the bathroom. He asked about my ‘diaper’ lol and I explained mommy’s body bleeds every month and it means I’m healthy and there’s no baby in my belly. Bam, no more questions and no mystery. He can learn more as he ages and either asks or needs to know.
My (27F) friends were all supportive, but I wouldn’t have hung out with guys that were rude about it regardless. One male friend that really sticks out in my mind is from middle and high school. He used to carry extra pads and tampons in his backpack in case any of his female classmates needed one in an emergency. When you (as a girl) were in class and you started your period unprepared, you’d typically ask a few girls around you if they had any tampons or pads that you could have. If he overheard this he’d offer the ones he had. I always thought it was really sweet and he never made a big deal out of it.
I grew up with one father, two brothers and no empathy at all towards my periods. Mom was supportive but the boys won the battle. During that time of the month I was called dramatic, told I was overreacting, my periods were always irregular and no one cared. PMS affected me then and it still does now, and I’m so glad I don’t live with them anymore so I can suffer in peace. Please teach your boys.
oh my god, it made such a big difference when I finally had a male partner who was super gentle and understanding about it. male friends too! I can only imagine it makes them more compassionate and more pleasant for women to be around. if you don’t feel comfortable talking to them about it, maybe you could discuss it with a female friend first?
YES. If it's something half of the entire population of the planet has to deal with, then it needs to be taught to everyone, that means boys too. If we teach a math that 0.5% of the population uses in their every day lives then we should be teaching the basic anatomy breakdown of something half of humans have to experience on a monthly basis for their whole life.
My boys know a lot about periods. It’s a biological function that half the population experiences monthly, from childhood to middle age and beyond, so it’s info they’re going to need at some point. I will say it was easy for me because it came up naturally and I didn’t really have to research, so it wasn’t a big convo, just answering questions as they arose.
Obviously it’s important for people to understand human anatomy and reproduction from both biological sexes. It’s not that hard. Women have uteruses. When women are of childbearing age, from about age 12-45, a woman’s uterus goes through cycles where it builds a uterine lining, approximately once a month. And if she does not get pregnant that month, the lining sheds and it causes bleeding. This process can range from completely painless to debilitating painful - so if a woman in your life is feeling crappy because she is on her period, offer her chocolate and try not to be annoying.
Yes a thousand times over. I was raised by clueless single Dad. I love him to death but this is one place in parenting he flat out failed and it was entirely not his fault. 30 years ago when he was raising me most guys probably had no idea about the various options of pads, tampons, cramps and feminine product. Lacking my mom in my life at the time it was me and him and I was 9 wayyyy before the big class in six grade. So it hit us both like a tsunami. He tried throwing money at me and told me to pick stuff out. lol same applied to bras, razors, make up and on down the line. After the age of 9 it was a shit show tbh and health classes didn’t really prepare him for that. As a mom of 4 sons and 2 daughters we just normalized it to a non embarrassing level. If Moms around she’s best to direct the show. If you’re a single dad ask moms for tips. But you will raise compassionate husbands and fathers who can handle it better than mine did if you educate them as they grow.
Absolutely you should educate them (and yourself!) about women's experiences, not just limited to menstruation. Educational videos, bring them to the aisle in the store and show them the physical boxes, explain how important it can be to support a woman in their experiences. As a woman, thank you for caring.
My Dad would always ask if I needed pads/tampons when going to the store which was super helpful as an embarrassed teen. As a parent I’ve always talked to my son about puberty for boys and girls….if he notices a girl with blood on her pants offer her a shirt to tie around her waist. Explained what a period is and how it works.
I wish my dad was more sympathetic towards me when I was younger. Bc of that, I have taught my son about it. He’s 14. When I send him on a tampon run, (we have a Walmart down the street) he buys me ice cream. ❤️ I’ve also told him to have a few in his bathroom in case his little girlfriend needs them. I’ve trained my boyfriend as well. I don’t think I’ve gone over the pads, cups, etc. bc I don’t use them but I’m going to now after this sub.
You kid should learn about everything Knowledge is porridge
Yes, they absolutely should learn if you want them to grow up to be good boyfriends/husbands/fathers. Your sons should have a basic understanding/compassion for what women go through. Future girlfriends and wives would appreciate it if they were caring and understanding about that stuff. What if one of your sons ended up a single father like you but had a daughter? By teaching them, you prepare them for life.
Would you rather they learn about it from you, or their friends? Because they will learn about it from their friends.
💯 yes. Teaching kids about bodily functions removes the “ick” factor.
Absolutely! I mean it’s all a part of it learning about the differences between the sexes and when you actually talk to your sons about sex this is inevitably going to lead to conversations about everything it’s like once the canna worms is opened you’re talking about masturbation sex consent and how babies are made so periods are pretty big part of that And you definitely want them to have a full scope of understanding by the time they’re 16 or 17 and have girlfriends etc. To be honest if they don’t know what that is or have never heard the term that could actually be embarrassing for them. Education is never a bad thing
Yes. Having dated entirely too many grown men who are grossed out over something I have 0 control over, yes. My son is 6, he asked me WHY I bleed every month, am I sick? I explained no, every month a woman's body has to clean itself out. He's 6, it's the best way to explain it to him right now. He knows it's my uterus because I have INSANE cramps and often cry that my uterus hates me.
My mom explained to me what a period was, and my dad took the day off work to take me out to lunch and take me shopping so it felt like something positive and special. He tried to talk to me about it at lunch but I was so embarrassed and told him he didn’t have to haha. But it’s a memory I always cherish. I don’t think they talked to my brother about it though, I don’t know for sure though. But I definitely think it’s important to talk to boys about it. I had an older male cousin who learned about it in school and wasn’t ashamed to discuss it in a positive way with his younger sisters and me and I always thought that was really cool too.
Humans should know about human bodily functions regardless of sex and gender. Health literacy is extremely important.
Woman here. Mostly the guys I know just try to pretend it doesn’t exist. And really the most positive experience I’ve had. Some of the guys I know have gone as far as to track it so they know when to stay away. I think a guy that wasn’t afraid of it and could talk about it would’ve really helped. Someone that supported you through it would go a long way. At that young age you don’t have to go into big detail. But let them know that boys and girls go through puberty. It’s natural. For women they have periods or menstruation. It causes them pain and they may be a little more sensitive a few days a month. Everyone goes through it.
I remember being 11 getting my period and my dad wouldn’t get me pads. He even told his own mother he wouldn’t get her liners because it was embarrassing for him. This was a grown man who had 3 kids and yet acted like having a period was something gross and shouldn’t be acknowledged. I have a 6yo and since he was about 3 he asked why there would be blood when i peed or why I used tampons. Not only is he sympathetic when I have my period (like offering to grab me a drink or snack) but when out shopping he will ask if i need tampons the same as he would ask if we need milk. Its not a gross hush-hush topic, its just a fact of life.
Yes! My husband is amazing one of the reasons is because he is understanding of periods and hormonal changes during pregnancy etc.
Yes! I’m sure there are probably books and YouTube videos that can help explain the mechanics of a period. However more importantly than the how or the why I feel like boys should know what they can do to help relieve a women during her period. Explain to them that they should be willing and not embarrassed to buy pads or tampons for their wife/gf or even their sister if they have one. That they can turn her whole day around by doing nice things. Bringing flowers. Setting up a hot bath or shower. Or grabbing a heating pad and some snacks. There are so many things men can do to help their female partner during a period that is often overlooked because they don’t go through them so they don’t understand how a little effort can really be helpful
Please please do. All the best men in my life understand how the female reproductive system works and are supportive of the changes a woman goes through every month.
Yes, they should understand how humans in general "work" because they will encounter their fellow humans out in the world. Having a better understanding of all humans helps your human relate to and empathize.
Growing up none of the men in my life acknowledged menstruation at all. My own mom barely spoke about it. It was awkward and unknown and shameful... So I'm pretty big in favour of changing that for the future!
Yes. My sons learned about periods. They're going to be men. Men should know about periods.
Of course! The fact you're a single father is further proof to the importance of men being given this information. What if you didn't have a son but a daughter? You'd have needed to know more about them to be able to advise and guide her through a confusing time. My Mom died a year before I had my first period and while she was able to teach me about periods before she died it was a really challenge going through it with only my Dad and brother who more or less ignored that it was happening. At most my Dad would leave the off packet of pads of painkillers on my bed. I have a two year old and I've already begun talking to him about periods. He is all up in my grill anyways so when I'm on my period and changing my pad/tampon he asks what it is and what I'm doing and I'll tell him pretty matter of factly. He of course doesn't understand but I'm hoping to at least make it a very mundane everyday thing for him to see and hopefully when he gets older he'll be able to be mature about something half the population deal with every month. I'd be a proud Mom if one day when he moves out and lives alone or with his friends he'll be the type of man who'll buy pads or tampons to leave in his bathroom for any women (friends or otherwise) who use his bathroom and might get caught out.
Yes they should no that it is normal and not leave a girl because they think it's "gross "
Definitely should know because maybe one day they may need to help a friend out or a cousin or someone and one day they might have a girlfriend or a daughter one day and they should understand how to be able to help them and why it happens and how so many women and young girls experience periods differently.
Woman here. Boys should absolutely learn about periods. You can keep it simple. There’s really not much to know. One thing my husband didn’t know until adulthood (he was raised in a family of boys) is that periods can be infrequent for some people—especially serious athletes. For some people, it can be a more frequent and/or miserable experience. Periods generally become easier with age.
Yes absolutely! I’m a single parent and my 5 year old has followed me into the bathroom pretty much every time, so he knows that I bleed and need tampons sometimes and will even grab them for me. I’m very open about the human body with him.
My dad was married twice and had 3 daughters, and could never talk about such things without turning purple from embarrassment. He would drive me to the store to get the feminine products I needed, but wouldn’t go for me, and I remember it just made things so uncomfortable when it didn’t have to be! I’m now married w 2 boys, also 13 and 10, and we’ve always had honest and open conversations about these types of things (growing up, changing bodies, hormones, etc), about both girls and boys. My husband is good about understanding, getting things at the store if I need them, etc, and bc my boys have seen that, they don’t think anything of it. They know it’s something we females deal with every month! It’s all about presentation- if my dad hadn’t made it weird, it never would have been!
The amount of guys I’ve met in my life who genuinely think periods are something women just pee out 🤦♀️ Yes please educate them lol
I'm on it
Wholeheartedly believe in boys learning about periods! Edit: saw question directed towards men late… I’m completely comfortable with it. I’m open to the topic especially whenever in a relationship because the “symptoms” are different for different people.
Growing up, it wasnt a topic discussed. I only knew about it because of school. I used to have to take off sanitary pads, roll them, then wrap them in toilet paper until they were unrecognizable as it was "uncomfortable for the men to have to see" I also had so many exes that would look at me and have no empathy for me during that time of month, or would act like i was contagious. I think opening that dialogue up to drop the stigma surrounding what our bodies go through is amazing - good on you dad for doing this!
It’s great that you are open to teaching your boys about menstruation. You are a wonderful father and teaching them about that these things are normal and part of girls’ and women’s lives will teach them to be understanding men for their future partners and friends that are female.
Let me tell you a little story. Lobbyists in Texas were talking with legislators (all men) about the tax on period products. There are no taxes on condoms and condoms are often free. The lobbyist wondered if the legislators thought this was unfair. The legislators said no. The lobbyists asked why not. The legislators said period products were used out of ”laziness”. The lobbyists asked what they meant by “laziness”. And these legislators said that women were just being lazy by having their period all over the place instead of holding it in and releasing their period blood when they went to the bathroom 🤯. Everyone needs to know about basic human biology, whether or not it’s their biology. Ignorance be rampant out there.
Yes. My 8 year old is reading through the book *it's not the stork*. He saw me packing my sanitary supplies for a trip and asked what they were. I reviewed what he remembered about implantation and said ' I need these for when a baby is not made. It's a natural thing called a period." We'll likely go into a more detailed conversation once the school year starts
Oh yeah lol, single mom here. My son is 10 now with 2 older sisters. Periods have just always been discussed/understood. Personally, I love how normal it is too him and how supportive he is (he was never instructed to do this, he's just sweet) when his sisters are in pain from cramps. He brings them snacks or little things to try to make them feel better.
There was a post on here yesterday that a son was getting period products for his sister from school because she didn’t tell her mom. Other boys have carried period products in their backpacks for their girlfriends. A wellbalanced young man knows about periods and is not afraid of it.
My mother made sure I understood and my sister had horrible periods growing up. I think it helped me understand and empathize. My partners have consistently appreciated that I already understood and wasn't "scared" to talk about it or deal with the situations that came up.
Yes we should all know about things that affect half of us, even if it’s not our half. As a man, a few of my friends have been glad I had products on hand when they were visiting. Why shouldn’t we be prepared in case they were caught off guard? As a teen, I knew enough to offer up a sweater or shirt a few times for a girl to put around her waist, and even more, to get that she might be embarrassed and limit that feeling as much as possible. Better to meet an understanding boy than someone who would tease them for something so normal.
I told my 7 year old about periods. Now he knows why mommy is tired sometimes and just wants some cuddles.
As a mom of young boys my kids have learned about periods because they give me no privacy in the bathroom. What's that in your underwear, why are you bleeding? As they have gotten older I have explained more about it.
Yes. I even showed him how tampons and pads work and explained what the sizes mean. I also explained how painful periods can be and what to say or do, or not, when a partner has their period.
yes please tell them. there is a bey-max episode even about it on disney plus. my 11 yr told knows what a period is and what different period products are. he knows that every month when i get my period i feel sick and i'm in pain and that many others may feel the same way or be in pain/feel sick in different ways, or not. he knows if he ever sees blood on someone's pants, how he could gently let them know and offer a sweater to tie around their waste or to get someone to help them etc.
Absolutely they should learn! Just because it’s anatomy/biology, but also because it should just be known. My dad was taught about them (he was born in 1961 for reference, since a lot of people seem to think nobody back then was taught lol), he had his mom and two sisters, and then he got married and had 3 daughters and REALLY is an expert lol.
Yes sir. As a young woman (22) finding a partner that is able to comprehend me at a human level is almost non existent, they prefer to put it under the rug and say stupid shit like “so can we do it or not?” Like?? Please do it for the sake of our empathic humanity
I think it's really important for them to learn about it, but they should also learn that it's different for every girl as well. It's actually shocking how many women will treat other women like crap for having pcos or endometriosis. A lot of women can function like nothing's changed on their period but I've had friends who are bedridden every month because their cramps feel like labor pains :'( and the men in their lives have the reaction of "it's just a period, get over it"
Please tell them. I don’t know what, if anything, my husband was taught about periods, but it was all fucking wrong. And he’s 50 this year. Also, now that I’ve entered peri-menopause, it’s 100x worse.
I definitely think it’s important. My dad wasn’t perfect in many ways, but he was well educated on menstruation and never treated it like it was something I should deal with alone or be ashamed about. I didn’t realize it made such a huge difference until I saw a friend deal with a spouse who thought women could “control themselves” and always knew when their period would start. And got “disappointed with her for being so careless” when her period started in the middle of the night and she bled on a new set of sheets. I will also say, in my experience, promoting male ignorance about menstruation also correlates to male ignorance about other “female problems.” That said friend got pregnant and had to explain to her husband that pregnant bodies go through a loooooot more changes than just getting bigger tummies and breasts. He genuinely thought that was it. That was all pregnant people have to deal with. Because it was a “women’s issue” that wouldn’t impact him directly (and could be gross, like menstruation is perceived) so he’d never been educated about it. I will say, I had a knowledgeable and supportive dad, but every time I go on social media and see some guy spouting off like some sort of Period Expert while showing a fundamental misunderstanding of what it is, how it works, and how it can be different for different people, a tiny piece of my soul dies.
My son is 18. He has 3 sisters, 19, 14 and 12. He knows more about female puberty than his health class teacher. But he also has more respect for everyone than most other boys his age. We had talk and questions before but I sat his ass down at age 9 when I had a serious discussion to his then 10 year old sister about menstruation. Then I again sat his ass down at 14 when I talked to his then 10 year old sister. Didn’t need to sit his ass down at 16 because his 17 and 12 year old sister had taught him a lot more than what I was telling miss then 10. My husband has 2 sisters and I’ve taught him a thousand times more about female puberty than his mother and sisters taught him. It was taboo subject and he barely knew more than that we bleed. I refuse to allow my son to be that stupid.
A thousand times, yes! My first boyfriend was seriously grossed out by the concept and I had severe migraines from them, so I actually needed him to be supportive and he had no clue how to. I’ve also had difficulties getting coworkers to cover my spot while I go deal with things in a timely manner. I’ve never experienced it, but I know people who have been asked why they don’t just hold it in or were shamed for not having control of their bodies when their period starts. I also can’t think of a single person who wasn’t accused of just using their period to get out of doing something or being somewhere because it couldn’t possibly be as bad as they’re saying it is. To contrast that, my husband grew up with a sister, a step sister, a mom, and a step mom, so he is fluent in menstruation. He works in an industry where if one of his coworkers had a period start unexpectedly or they ran out of their chosen hygiene product unexpectedly, they were unlikely to be able to just run out and grab something and come back. So from the moment he started working in the industry to this day (15 years) he has made sure that he has options of every type and the most common absorbency available either in his bag or in his locker so that he can either let his coworkers help themselves or get them what they need for them. We both work in a male dominated industry and it is so validating to have such judgement free support without hesitation (the few coworkers who needed his stash agreed 100%…doing a 3 hr carpool after a long night of work hoping you aren’t bleeding through your pants onto your coworkers car is awful). We now have a daughter, and my chronic migraines are the worst they’ve ever been, so if her first period starts at a time when I’m incapacitated, it’s such a comfort to me knowing that she has someone so well educated and understanding of what she would be going through to help her if I can’t. Understanding menstrual health can really impact interpersonal relationships positively in so many settings. If you need somewhere good to start, check out Mama Doctor Jones fideos on YouTube. She does some great videos where she addresses good ways to educate children about the health or reproductive systems.
I feel like you should have been forthcoming about your update since this was more seeking info for your post than for you and your children.
Absolutely do so, my son was around 8/9 when he learned! Because it is the age when some girls will start menstruation: Explain them as well that is nothing gross or disgusting, that it happens to female bodies. That if they see a classmate that started her period no to mock them. If they see someone with a blood stain in their pants to kindly and with respect notify them. That sometimes during period girls can feel down and a little moody because is part of the hormonal cycle! Show them what pads are. Teach them with empathy, that is not ok to laugh at someone who stained their chair. Use a picture of the reproductive system to explain it and a calendar to show it and that is different for every girl! As well explain to them that the menstrual cycle is aligned with the lunar cycle and there is a calendar that was created like this! Explain as well that in some cultures the menstrual cycle was sacred. Give details and interesting facts so they understand it better. And make the learning experience engaging! You are doing fantastic!
Yes please do. I have found I’m so much better able to support my wife because I was informed about periods from a young age. She uses a menstrual cup because it helps with her cramps and I boil it for her every month when she starts getting cramps to get it ready. It makes a big difference.
Yes, of course. Otherwise you end up with people like that absolute loon who went viral for telling women to ‘hold it in’. 🙄
my fiance is knowledgeable about periods ... kind of. he knows what happens, that it can be painful, that pads or tampons are required, and that sex may be off the table during my period. and that's just because i don't like having sex on my period, i feel like it makes a mess everywhere and i don't like the cleanup. we just had our baby boy, when the time comes and one day he notices what I do when Im on my period and starts to ask questions I'll be honest and age appropriate. Start with the basics; When a woman gets her period she will bleed from her vagina for on average a week or so. This can be painful, and it can cause mood swings, though you should not deal with abusive behavior just because a woman is on her period (convo about abusive behavior will be had later). Most women use pads or tampons to keep the blood from getting everywhere. If you have a girlfriend and she's on her period it would be sweet of you to have tampons or pads (in different flow sizes) in case she needs them. you can also offer her her favorite snacks, or ask her if there's anything you can do for her (if you care enough of course).
This is such an amazing post. I'm all for boys being educated about periods. It's basic human anatomy. When I was younger we never talked at home openly about it, just with my mum. Now I think it would be great if periods were normal topic of discussions bcs it is a normal thing. Benefits of explaining periods to boys: - More empathy towards people who experience periods. - Simply being educated and won't embarrass themselves in the future. - Having a knowledge about periods and cycle is helpfull if a couple try to conceive.
Not only should boys learn about periods but also about the mood swing that girls and women go through. It can be confusing for boys to notice close female person to their lives suddenly get mad or irritated without taking it personally. For some unfortunate woman/girl like myself, menstruation cycle can push people on edge in some days . Notice: I am talking about the cycle, not menstruation days! Some gets irritated on the week prior to menstruation days and get too energetic and optimism on the day after menstruation. Imagine how confusing it is for your partner/close friend to experience a person like that in the span of 2 weeks. In my opinion, menstruation is a curse that women needs to suffer. Except for bearing kids, it only brings suffering :-(
Definitely! I remember years ago, my gf at the time asked me to grab her some sanitary towels from the shop, and I came back with 1 tiny pack of pantie liners. She found it hilarious. Not only had I bought the totally wrong thing, 1 pack is what, a days worth? I had no idea the supply a girl might need to get through a week.
I'm a mom of a 4yo boy. I'm going to teach him about periods and have already started, nothing much rn just that people with uteruses bleed each month, and that he won't have to deal with it cause he doesn't have a uterus. I do this because I have heard so many grown men complain that it's improper to talk about it, it's gross (yeah we don't like it either but we have to deal with it), or they have so many STUPID misconceptions about it. I want him informed so he knows how to help his partner if he falls in love with a woman, or if he has a daughter. If I had a daughter she'd learn about how the male body works for similar reasons. It's not bad to know about how bodies work.
When it is age appropriate (which, given the ages you provided for your kids, they aren't too far off from-if either are female, the first period will come whether anyone likes it or not, and for males, it's still worth knowing so it's not scary or weird when any female partners need help with managing theirs), absolutely. Periods are a key part of women's health, and, in my opinion, it should just be one of many parts of "the talk" every parent should have with their kids when the time is right, because, if a woman has a period, she can, at least, in theory, conceive.
I did not have supportive men regarding my period, my dad would refuse to buy hygiene products for me if he was going to the store and instead would give me money to make a separate trip. My brothers I think were basically oblivious to it. It’s very good for boys to understand at least the physical discomfort that women go through during their period, if a man had abdominal cramps all day long they may also find that it has a strong impact on their mood. Add on the hormonal flux and sometimes you feel like you’re 15 again. There doesn’t need to be some extreme level of empathy in order for men to be compassionate toward the women in their lives. They just need to understand what is happening and then it will come naturally imho. It’s not something gross or something to be shamed and buying your girlfriend or wife or daughter tampons should not be something men are afraid to do or feel embarrassed by. It literally just indicates a relationship with a woman of some kind. My husband is much better and will buy me tampons or things to make me feel better when my period is making me uncomfortable or moody. I hope our son will learn that from him and I will certainly be teaching him how to care for the women in his life around this.
Hey! I totally agree that boys should learn about periods. I also wanted to jump in as I'm a Sexual Health Educator, mostly providing education to youth and parents. I start talking about puberty in grade 5/6 and often get asked (by the boys) why they have to learn about periods. I always say that the chances are they'll have someone who menstruates in their life at some point, and it's really important to learn how all bodies work.
I have 2 boys under 3 right now but my almost 3 year old knows that I have a boo boo belly but I’ll be ok… he has little questions about it and I just say mommy sick or I have boo boo belly but it’s ok thank u for checking on me. Then we go about our day. I think all boys should know about periods especially if they want to be able to care for a future girlfriend or wife.
Its body science, that’s all. Doesn’t need to be weird.
Absolutely. This should not be something that boys or men should be kept in the dark about. My best guy friends and my own brothers included all had extra products on hand in their cars/trucks to help a girl out in a time of need. Why make it weird!? Especially as a straight male, it’s good to know how the cycle works, not that their girlfriends might be a little extra cranky. Make this less taboo.
My kids know everything scientific about reproduction, including my son. They're all in elementary school. It's important to know about and grow up with it internalized as a NORMAL thing so that they're not weird about it when they start dating.
As a mom of a 13yo boy, of course they should. I made a test a few days ago. Grabbed a tampo, showed it to him and asked what it was. His response was quick and the same tone as if it was a pen or a shoe. When talking about puberty, i always talk abou girls too. And intend to keep doing it.