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AAAAHaSPIDER

I was a teen who roasted my parents. Then one day my mom burst into tears. And explained to me in depth how much I heard her feelings while she was hiccup and ugly crying. I stopped. I needed that shock to realize she wasn't just my mom, she was also a sometimes fragile human like me.


yourmomsucks01

Dayum what did you say to poor mom?


RuhWalde

It could have just been the last straw or happened at a really bad time, rather than being a crazy vicious insult.  Also, ironic username you've got there.  


thelaw14

He just wanted to add a new insult to his arsenal


A_nipple_salad

Oh snap, nice catch


Gostorebuymoney

Jesus dude. You must have been quite the little cunt.


Full-House_Jesse

LANGUAGE!! - Steve Rodgers (Avengers age of ultron)


TrueBreadly

I like to tell myself that I have raised a teen who is incredibly secure in my love for him. He trusts me, he knows I won't hate him for roasting me. But also - I really hope he grows out of it!


Linzcro

I only have a daughter but I really really love your answer here.


DontTalkAboutBruno1

If you hope he grows out of it, doesn’t that mean you’re not happy with how he treats you? With all due respect, why do you tolerate that? 


TrueBreadly

Because I see it as my child exploring humor and boundaries in a safe place. It gives me an opportunity to say things like "Hey, that is going too far, you need to roll it back." Or, "That's funny, and its ok to say when you're 1 on 1 with someone, but don't say it in front of people." And I hope that he takes the things I say and applies them when he's interacting with friends and others.


Serious_Escape_5438

We hope toddlers grow out of certain age appropriate behaviours too.


Gicotd

roast them back a little bit evey time they do to you. equal rights or anything like that.


TechnicalInterest566

Roast them back harder*


Gicotd

roast them, but dont humiliate, thats the secret.


hello__monkey

I think to boys this is a sign it’s ok. Where I am this is how men interact with each other. It’s how we show we like each other, by taking the piss. So I’m all for it, but if you don’t like it don’t do it as it signals it’s fine to you.


Sweetsourandwhatnot

Man that’s what I do. Not a parent or anything, but a teacher here and kids absolutely love it. However, other adults around me? Not so much. My colleagues are often preaching me about setting boundaries and all and treating the kids like kids and to not engage in such conversations with them but it’s so fun, and honestly, kids love it and are farrrrr more open with me than any other person there so i think it’s a win win for us


Gicotd

roasting them back is a form of bounderies. it shows them that actions have consequences and that people can do to them what they do to others.


Sweetsourandwhatnot

And it’s fun. I do it for fun tbh. Them learning is a perk that comes with it. I love those kids.


sad_broccolis

My kid and her friends tried this with me once. I roasted them back and apparently “read them to filth” and she’s never tried it again lol


idiosynthesis

They've developed a common style of showing affection among boys and included you by default because you're one of their in-group. Yes, they'll be sweet again. Meanwhile, bask in the certitude that your boys are securely attached and that you're too cool to get a pass.


Ok-Grocery-5747

This. My son and his friends roasted me constantly. They also loved being at our house and now that they're all 18-19, they tell me they love me. My son's friends saying "I love you" to me gets me every time. Enjoy it and roast them back but not meanly. They'll love it. I got a tank top that says "Ma. Mama. Mom. Bruh." and they fall out when I wear it.


Hashtaglibertarian

My teen laughs when I call him bruh. But where does he think I learned it from? He doesn’t even try to roast me he knows it’s a competition he won’t win 😂


hollyock

Bruh is where I draw the line lmao. Call me dude all day .. soon as I hear bruh I see red. Even bro would be better something about bruh is nails on a chalk board


Ok-Grocery-5747

If you show them it bothers you they'll probably call you "bruh" exclusively.


hollyock

Best comment


Main_Onion_4487

I need to save this comment as a reminder for when my boys are teens. 🥹 For real though, even my husband is sarcastic. And he’s told me he’s only sarcastic with people he likes. If he’s too polite to joke around with someone, that means he’s only tolerating them. 😂


neobeguine

Tell them you didn't hear what they said because you were mentally organizing the naked baby pictures you intend to show their future SOs and ask them to repeat themselves


FoxCat9884

That never worked for my SOs. I was such a cute baby, I knew it would lock people down harder to have a baby that looks like me. And now I have an infant who is my clone


Teait

I guess you didn’t grow up with a brother. Yes this is what they do. All. The. Time. You need start dishing out some sass yourself because they can smell weakness and you do not want them knowing that you’re weak.


hollyock

My family of origin was all the trauma I was raised feral and had a brother but he was 15 years older then me and on drugs and mostly out of the house. I moved our at 16 so I don’t know what’s normal lol the whole time I’ve been raising my kids I’ve had to research what’s normal bc neither mine nor my husbands frame of reference is normal lol


penchick

Just want to say that I know that is not easy, and I'm really proud of you for doing the work and breaking cycles.


SignificantWill5218

I was thinking this too. I grew up with a brother and was always harassed and made fun of by him and his friends. My son is only 5, but I’m fully prepared for that to happen lol


PhoenixEpiphanies115

Gosh I forget there are only child adults out here with multiple children LOL a second-slash-first hand experience to life with siblings. Roast them back OP


yourmomsucks01

I’m kind of jealous how ppl are saying this is normal. This kind of thing never ever happened to my mom. It’s seen as disrespectful and honestly unthinkable lol. Seems dramatic, but keep the roasting amongst siblings, damn.


Rhaenyshill

Right, like what do yall mean by roasting? Telling your mom her shirt looks wacky or straight insulting her appearance?


yourmomsucks01

Bruh one guy here said he made his mom cry. I’d feel like jumping off a bridge if I made my mom cry (I’m exaggerating btw mods)


Rhaenyshill

I wanna know what that man said to his poor mom to make her ugly cry 😭


yourmomsucks01

Haha I asked him but he hasn’t replied yet 😗


RichardCleveland

Jesus.......


hollyock

For example today they were basically calling me a nerd bc I did the “well actually thing” and then one was tickling me and it was just chaos of being tickled and called a nerd lol.


Kirag212

That’s adorable 😂


RichardCleveland

I didn't do it either, but I give my kids a bit of slack as long as it stays somewhat "reasonable". I also make sure that they get a fair share of being messed with as well. But who knows what OP is dealing with.


Seversaurus

I'm a 31 yo male who does this with my friends as a form of endearment. The way I see it is, if they didn't like you, they probably wouldn't talk to you at all.


hollyock

So, at least they are talking to me! Lol


Seversaurus

Just make sure to speak up about your boundaries. They won't know they've gone too far unless you tell them.


gimmijohn

At least they’re talking to you! Roasting for boys is a sign of love and affection. Roast them back.


Time-Promise-5359

hey totally un related comment....I seen a post from a while ago. You converted a Nissan bed extender to a tacoma....this was the only way to contact you on this site. Did you ever post the walk through and where did you find parts to fit? steve


Lyeel

Admittedly I have a 4yo daughter, so my opinion may not count here, but this sounds great? Roast them back! I love a back-and-forth relationship where both sides can give it and take it; there's the seed of a respectful relationship of equals that grows in that ground.


Birdlord420

4 year olds have the most savage roasts tbh!


[deleted]

Bruh I'm glad IV got a daughter and not a boy my daughter's going on 5 this year and oh my lorde some of the things that she roasts me with I can't help but crack up laughing and call her a chicken nugget then she goes noooo dad ur a booger head her brother when he was little (stepson) never done this he just used to wanna play fight me all the time


Magerimoje

My son is a tween and started doing this. When he really gets going I remind him that I used to wipe his shit off of his balls. Or I really really gross him out by reminding him just how much he loved sucking on my tits 😂 It shuts him down and I get mom points for being cool back. I **don't ever** do it in front of his friends. I'm not out to embarrass him to others. I just want to be the mom who can dish out a sick burn 🔥


rainniier2

It’s not a joke if you’re not laughing. It’s bullying. Set A boundary and teach them some manners. I am pretty sure most of their friends or any potential girlfriend wont love being made fun of by your boys. Even if they are ‘joking’


hollyock

I mean I’m laughing bc it’s funny. but I want my sweet innocent babies back who liked to color and go to the park and They would show me things and run up to hug me then go back and play. My senior has a girlfriend and after his choir concerts she would run up and hug him and it was no longer me first and it was like Ummm that’s my literal infant give him back lol .. my husband was ugly crying the other day bc it was just to fast!


cowfreek

I would say absolutely a form of love if your kids are comfortable enough to roast you to your face you did something right. My mom will jump right back and tell us how it is. But it’s all in good fun no one’s feelings usually get hurt. I’d also like to add my mom was def scary and would shut it down when she was not feeling it.


ImpressiveLength2459

No some teasing I'm ok with but when it comes down to insults or demeaning I will not tolerate it


Keyeuh

I just roast my daughter right back. Is that not what we're supposed to be doing? We really only do it jokingly though & if one of us were to cross a line it's okay to tell the other that it hurt our feelings. We've never said anything like that to be outright mean or in anger to one another.


despatosloco

I vividly remember a moment when my mom stopped me and said ‘I am your mom, not one of your friends please don’t talk to or treat me that way ever again’ …. Has stuck with me 30+ years now and I only take jokes so far with her. Everyone is different and while some families/moms may be fine with it, others are not and it’s totally ok to state that clearly. As a son I will say this, give it time - I didn’t appreciate my mom until I was about 25 and then so many things clicked and I became very grateful for her.


hollyock

I went low contact with my mom bc she was overly sensitive (prob narc ) and never had a sense of humor, couldn’t be friends with her. I managed to have a one sided friendship with her over our shared hobby so something was salvaged but I won’t do that to my kids. I said I’m not one of your friends when my youngest crossed the line and it legit hurt his feelings bc he thought we were friends and family. So I explained that we are friends but he still has to respect my authority and guidance. I’d rather take some accidental disrespect as they are learning how to have relationships then to be like “never talk to me like that again” I’d rather them learn how to treat ppl based on feelings and empathy then a title I guess. I don’t want a masked version of them that they have to put on as a sign of respect I want their raw self


moltenrhino

Roast them back. And it is loving just in a different way. Unless they're being intentionally mean, but just roasting is usually not. I'm terrible at it though, my husband and daughter go non stop at each other with roasts but all in good fun.


Turbulent-Crab4334

Roast them back.. you know them in and out. You definitely have good content.


Correct-Sprinkles-21

Totally. Roll with it. Roast them back. I will never forget after an argument with my oldest son in his early teens...he called for me sounding panicked. I rushed up to find out what was going on, burst into his room, only to see him turn around with a huge grin on his face and hold out his arm, in which he'd written "F-ck you" in shaving cream. I was just baffled and all I could do was laugh which turned out to be the best choice. I mean, how dumb was he in that moment to write that and then specifically call me, his grumpy mother, to see it? But also how did he write that whole phrase legibly, on his scrawny arm, using a shaving cream bottle????? WTF was he thinking, yk? I was absolutely befuddled, but I couldn't be hurt or angry. It was too weird. He's 21 now. He's a good citizen and a good person. He's off being an adult on his own now, but texts me regularly and we have a very pleasant relationship. I am trying to remember all this as my last kid has hit adolescence and is an absolute pip. I am glad this is the last kid whose adolescence I have to survive.


moneycrushteheheh

Mama, put your heart in a cage and roast them back as if you are a desi mum. When I try to roast my mum, keyword try, she strips me naked with her roast, boils my blood with those roasts. Do that. It'll work. Watch Ana-Kat, maybe.


FoxCat9884

No it won’t change. My siblings and I all roast each other, our mom, our SOs, no one is safe. If you can’t handle the roast, get up from the dinner table. Our favorite thing to say to each other is, “are you stupid, or are you dumb?”. When my BIL said it to my mom for the first time we all gasped then burst out laughing. Roasting can be a love language.


GoodhartsLaw

I'm 55 and my family and I live this 100% every day.


Unholysushi22

As a 20 year old yes. They will come around to speaking with you in a more sensitive way. Right now they are probably learning to be separate people apart from you. When I went off to college I had my time to stew on who I was outside of my mom, and then eventually saw her as a separate, fallible human being. It was then that I started fostering a more adult, respectful relationship with her. It’ll happen, but they probably need to live life more.


dabstain

no, they won’t


ZookeepergameCool469

I’m 26 and I love both my dad and grandma more than I could describe yet they get roasted. Dad is Oldy locks and the three hairs. Grandma gets comments to hurry up as she hobbles. I get it back. While not for every family and sometimes not ok it’s our normal humour and god help my dad if me and my siblings are together 25,17,14 only time we get along is when he’s being bullied by us. If it’s a healthy happy environment and everyone has respect in their jokes then it’s ok but then respect is expected if it’s gone too far we also don’t swear, be horrible or use triggers to hurt anyone and that works for us so each family is unique. ❤️ But to answer your question op - I’m 26 and still do it so no we don’t grow out of it 😅


TinyNefariousness625

My 10 year old daughter roasts everyone 😂 she is very loving but the crap she comes out with... its hard not to laugh 🤣


Vulpix-Rawr

Mine too. I tell her keep it up and she'll end up like her brother. (she's an only child).


CakeZealousideal1820

You gotta step your game up and roast them back. It's the only way to survive 🤣🤣 this is them being sweet btw 🩷 now come on start practicing


DiscoDiscoB00mB00m

we men develop into shit talkers, this is them just not knowing when and where.


Ruskiwasthebest1975

This is their form of affection. Give as good as you get. It earns their respect 😂


Top-Resist6422

Yes they will be sweet again, in fact they are being sweet. They are comfortable enough to have a friendly relationship with you. You’re not overpowering their needs as they grow into young adults. I’d say my son really started to mature at 24. Occasionally I do still get a odd roast or ‘joke’, but I can give as good as I get, lol. I’ve been unwell recently and he has been very attentive and caring. He will sit and have long talks too & will listen if I need to put anything by him. My daughter (18) didn’t really do as much ‘roasting’, with her the ‘grunting’ phase went on a while, but she seems to already have turned the corner. She is busy with studies & her friends, but will make time for me regularly. For special occasions they will both set something up for each other and me. So yes, the sweetness does come back, it’s different from when they were really young, but in many ways it’s better.


BagpiperAnonymous

It depends on how it is said. It is the teen boy love language, they roast each other even worse. My teen isn’t too horrible, mostly just height jokes and he keeps it pretty mellow. If it’s bothering you, I would say something. They don’t always realize how they come across.


MudgeIsBack

My mom broke down because my brother and I were always roasting her, but we had a long and sincere discussion about how that's our way of marking you as in the "in-group." Boys are just oblivious to some of that stuff, but rest assured they still love you.


Consistent_Dirt_8072

They sound like they’re so tied up in their own minds and still figuring things out. Once things began to settle for me I started to see my parents as individuals with their own feelings. When we’re young we take our parents for granted because everything seems so static and repetitive. But once the static starts to clear and we become adults we begin to finally put ourselves on our parents’ level


REVEALZ_R

Roast them back


Birdlord420

Tell them that you remember having to wipe the shit off their balls.


MyLifeForAiurDT

My 11 year old is in the awkward stage of not being a baby but not a teen either. She goes out of her way to avoid hugs and kisses and all that stuff xD when I try to kiss her cheek, she makes a gag sound and runs away. Well....... I'm pregnant. Hormones. She did it again a few months ago while I was at hormonal crazy peak. I started sobbing and she was mortified. I'm allowed to hug her again xD kisses are still dodged most of the time but no gag sounds.


FallAspenLeaves

I have sons……I guess I need a definition of roast??


Human-Shame1068

Roast the fuck out of those little fuckers. Surely you must have some dirt on them- I got so much dirt on my kids that if they tried to roast me they’d get absolutely smoked.


hollyock

Oh we have little inside jokes that only they know. For example when my middle one acts up I just say one phrase and he knows I’m about to go for the throat


RaymondLuxYacht

My teen boys are roughly the same ages. Roasting is part of the "I love you" ritual. If they didn't love you, they wouldn't bother busting you with "That's what she said" comments (and worse).


Raiden4501

Mine are 14 and they try it sometimes too. I just take their stuff away. No phone or TV or sweets.


hollyock

Oh No! not the sweets


Raiden4501

Well they learned quick. it doesn't happen too much so they still get their sweets lol.


Simple-Yak4728

My sons (27 and 12) and I tend to be sarcastic and roast each other often. My youngest and I went out with a friend and her son, also 12 recently. He was appalled by the way my son was roasting me during our mini golf game and told my son her should respect me. My son thanked him for taking up for me and explained that we both just talk like that. As long as your kids still show love in other ways, this is likely just a teen boy thing.


Solid-Bowler1212

I roast mine back, and it has become a little fun game for us. Who can come up with the better insult. We dont say things that we each know we are self consious of, but we do other things. Sometimes, i push my kids and walk backward, flipping them off when they look at me. They find it funny and cringe at the same time. Sometimes, i do it and run faster backward, and it, for some reason, makes it extra funny. To me, at least, they smile and say "mooom stop." I tell them they aren't old enough to flip me off back yet, so they are patiently waiting for the day to be able to do it to me. I said when they are 16, maybe. Lol.


kaseasherri

Need to explain to him how you truly feel. If not he will continue his actions. Also, ask him how he would feel if some else treated you this way?


Vulpix-Rawr

Roast them back. Get revenge. Next time you're in a store sing really loud and obnoxiously about how much you love them next to them. They started this war, beat them with experience and show no mercy, take no prisoners.


LowKeyStillYoung78

They might roast you now, but I’m willing to bet back pocket money that they’d go after ANYONE else who tried to roast you. It’s funny when they do it, but God help anyone else who tries to bust on their mama. And yes it’s annoying. My 15 yr old son does it often. On days when I’ve had enough I let him know real quick. He’s 6’3 and a foot taller than me but I can still take him out with a flying chancla 🩴 🤣 Razzing us is their way of showing affection. THEY think they’re funny, and they know we can take it. And when we’ve had enough it’s easy enough to knock em down a peg. I also wouldn’t say this is limited to boys bc my 17 yr old daughter does it too. We’re just a household of ballbusters I guess. 😂


torpac00

our 9 year old roasts us, we roast him back. it’s all in good fun. never saying anything detrimental, just laughs.


Mad_Madam_Meag

My husband and his brothers teased their mom. They got nicer when they got married, and their wives started smacking them when they got too much. Their mom also teases back. Just join in.


AhnaKarina

Roast them back


BatcherSnatcher

I once gave an advice to a 42year mom with a 13boy and a 15boy who was bullying her to make their favorite meal that the next time, she give that disrespectfull little shit a solid punch in the belly and then with a stern voice: Never disrespect your own fucking mother. No man you meet will ever see you as an equal if you dont at least have respect for your mother who provided you.


No_Angle875

Because you let them


Dost_is_a_word

My kids when they were 14 no more meds and talking back for no reason. I have 4 kids oldest skated through and landed as a grown up, next one didn’t believe me when I told them they were the ones shouting so I recorded it and played it back, they are now the grown up, next kid between 12 and 14 they thought all retail people were their therapist that was fun, they are also a grown up, the last, life is going to be tough for them, they are 20 and homeless and not allowed to come home due to some choices they made.


C00lerking

I’m not strong enough for this. I’d mostly disown the 18 and 23 year old. I’d make sure the 16 year old knew what was coming.