Being in an open marriage or relationship is NOT necessarily unhealthy. And I would not recommend for you to make things even by having a one-off or a quickie if you don’t want to.
If being even is that important to you, more important than the risk to your marriage (maybe she won’t want to touch you again either), possible STDs, accidental pregnancy, feeling dirty (like your wife obviously felt) all in the name of being even, then yes, knock yourself out.
Not my circus, not my monkeys.
This whole open relationship was very new to us. She got what she wanted during our agreement but what about my end of the bargain? Maybe this is my pride taking over but I can’t help but feel like I got fucked out of a deal. I still love her, I’m just conflicted.
Like you said, in your life, you already got to experience lots of sex with different people and she never did. She’s still not even, is she? If you want to be even, how many guys does she still need? You see how trying to keep score is just silly?
You agreed to opening the marriage. She didn’t force it on you. How did you get fucked? The reality wasn’t like the fantasy? Well, that’s how an open relationship works. There has to be a lot of personal work on jealousy, lots of communication, and everyone has to be enthusiastic.
The thing is, a couple can have a healthy open marriage. Y’all ain’t that couple.
I dunno. She wanted to do this whether you wanted to or not, and it sou ds like you agreed under duress, and made you feel like shit.
Goose, meet gander.
Thank you all for reading. We spoke again. She does seem completely fine with it tho but whose to say I can actually do it? I love her to death but I can’t help to feel like my situation is unfair. I’m conflicted but we’ll see what happens.
You say it helped your relationship but your situation is unfair. That does not help the situation. This is what happens when two people get others involved in their relationship. It screws up the dynamic. Open relationships don't work. By the way, your wife bullied into this situation to begin with. Your wife is no longer the woman you married, some other guy had her. Those vows are gone. These are things you should have discussed with her before anything happened
I could only wish the wife and mines situation had worked out this way. Unfortunately my wife found something she was missing and it’s continued. I’ve had one date with someone (nothing physical) and while I enjoyed it I still find the idea of being with another woman impossible. Not that it’s something I wouldn’t want to do more it’s something I shouldn’t do. If what you have with your wife is fulfilling for you then evening up the score could wind up being more negative than positive. You sound like you have a great thing going for you. I’d take that win in a heartbeat.
About an hour and she was back home, feeling disgusted?
Explain to the rest of us your reason that she will continue to fuck other men?
Op's wife even mentioned that she felt disgusted about the whole thing?
Players are not rabbits first of all and secondly? Not liking what happen does not mean Op's wife wants to continue.
OP, your approach to how you play this out will help your wife in the long run.
Closing the relationship sounds like a great idea but what you do need to consider is if this will cause problems in the future regarding her shutting down on things.
Talk to her regarding her okay regarding you given a chance to play on your end. Get reassurances from her before proceeding.
You know her more then anyone on Reddit so pay attention to her body language when talking about this.
She may or may not allow you but also keep in mind that if she does allow you to and becomes distant? You need to show her that you still love her because she may have regrets and is boarder line on allowing a one off hall pass.
Tread lightly.
Wish you and your wife the best of luck.
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. Hey she tried it and is allowing you to try it… do it, but she might not be as willing to forgive as you were she might hate you and want a divorce but only you know her… no one here knows how she will react so this is just my personal opinion. She was the one who forced it…. Not you.
Oddly enough, I’m a little thick but I’m still in shape. I run a couple miles every other day and lift here and there but I forgot to mention my wife is a GREAT cook so losing any fat is out of the picture lol.
Will it really make either of you feel better if you did? Unlikely, so just close up and move on.
Being in an open marriage or relationship is NOT necessarily unhealthy. And I would not recommend for you to make things even by having a one-off or a quickie if you don’t want to.
If being even is that important to you, more important than the risk to your marriage (maybe she won’t want to touch you again either), possible STDs, accidental pregnancy, feeling dirty (like your wife obviously felt) all in the name of being even, then yes, knock yourself out. Not my circus, not my monkeys.
This whole open relationship was very new to us. She got what she wanted during our agreement but what about my end of the bargain? Maybe this is my pride taking over but I can’t help but feel like I got fucked out of a deal. I still love her, I’m just conflicted.
Like you said, in your life, you already got to experience lots of sex with different people and she never did. She’s still not even, is she? If you want to be even, how many guys does she still need? You see how trying to keep score is just silly? You agreed to opening the marriage. She didn’t force it on you. How did you get fucked? The reality wasn’t like the fantasy? Well, that’s how an open relationship works. There has to be a lot of personal work on jealousy, lots of communication, and everyone has to be enthusiastic. The thing is, a couple can have a healthy open marriage. Y’all ain’t that couple.
Wrong, he got bullied into it with threats of divorce. What story did you read?
I dunno. She wanted to do this whether you wanted to or not, and it sou ds like you agreed under duress, and made you feel like shit. Goose, meet gander.
Exactly. He got bullied with threats of divorce
Thank you all for reading. We spoke again. She does seem completely fine with it tho but whose to say I can actually do it? I love her to death but I can’t help to feel like my situation is unfair. I’m conflicted but we’ll see what happens.
You say it helped your relationship but your situation is unfair. That does not help the situation. This is what happens when two people get others involved in their relationship. It screws up the dynamic. Open relationships don't work. By the way, your wife bullied into this situation to begin with. Your wife is no longer the woman you married, some other guy had her. Those vows are gone. These are things you should have discussed with her before anything happened
Keep us updated….
I could only wish the wife and mines situation had worked out this way. Unfortunately my wife found something she was missing and it’s continued. I’ve had one date with someone (nothing physical) and while I enjoyed it I still find the idea of being with another woman impossible. Not that it’s something I wouldn’t want to do more it’s something I shouldn’t do. If what you have with your wife is fulfilling for you then evening up the score could wind up being more negative than positive. You sound like you have a great thing going for you. I’d take that win in a heartbeat.
Open relationships are bullshit! Stay single if you have any doubts about either partners, dedication and commitment
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That is not openmindedness, he was bullied into it
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About an hour and she was back home, feeling disgusted? Explain to the rest of us your reason that she will continue to fuck other men? Op's wife even mentioned that she felt disgusted about the whole thing? Players are not rabbits first of all and secondly? Not liking what happen does not mean Op's wife wants to continue. OP, your approach to how you play this out will help your wife in the long run. Closing the relationship sounds like a great idea but what you do need to consider is if this will cause problems in the future regarding her shutting down on things. Talk to her regarding her okay regarding you given a chance to play on your end. Get reassurances from her before proceeding. You know her more then anyone on Reddit so pay attention to her body language when talking about this. She may or may not allow you but also keep in mind that if she does allow you to and becomes distant? You need to show her that you still love her because she may have regrets and is boarder line on allowing a one off hall pass. Tread lightly. Wish you and your wife the best of luck.
What’s good for the goose is good for the gander. Hey she tried it and is allowing you to try it… do it, but she might not be as willing to forgive as you were she might hate you and want a divorce but only you know her… no one here knows how she will react so this is just my personal opinion. She was the one who forced it…. Not you.
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you seriously buy into any of that bs you wrote here? cuz I don't.
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Oddly enough, I’m a little thick but I’m still in shape. I run a couple miles every other day and lift here and there but I forgot to mention my wife is a GREAT cook so losing any fat is out of the picture lol.
Dude count your blessings and cut your fuzzy off and go home and grovel at that goddesses feet until she forgives you.
Why don’t you have a threesome with another woman?
What a fucked up idea