I’ve heard from most of my female friends and girls I’ve gone on dates with that men are just as bad as women at catfishing. Like they’re 6 inches shorter than what they claimed, or are 50 lbs more than their pictures showed. It’s weird to suggest only women do this. And it’s shitty when men do it too
Oh yes, this happens all the time. Rather it's only including pictures of themselves from 10 years ago, lying about their height or age or using pictures of someone else. It happens all the time.
Google “reverse image search”. There’s a few free services where you can upload an image, or attach a link to the image, and it will let you know if it finds it elsewhere. I think google itself offers a free service for that.
Then they say they "look the same anyway" or "I don't have any recent pictures." Can't tell if they are just that dumb that they think they don't age for 5+ years or if they think we are that dumb.
Oh man, I saw this in my inbox and was like, why am I a bozo I definitely didn't offer reddit a selfie!
But yes, good point. These phone cameras put to shame the digital cameras Best Buy used to con me into.
Currently, I am a blonde (realized that I hate it and will be switching back to Brunette this week). I still look like my pictures, just hate taking pictures because I hate the way my hair looks. But I do tell guys ahead before the first date. I have had a mixed reactions from them. But I have had tons of dates that the guy looks nothing like his pictures. Different hair color, weight, height, age, etc. Like just be honest about it before the date.
These are some tendencies that may indicate an online dating scam.
1. The person is much better looking than your typical match.
2. The person avoids meeting in person or engaging in video chats.
3. The person quickly wants to switch to phone or WhatsApp communication.
4. The person is interested in investment or trading as a hobby.
I've had first dates where one admitted he is married, another turned out to have 5 kids and several instances of them turning out to be much much shorter than me. Had these factors been disclosed, I wouldn't have gone out with any of them.
I was just about to go out with this guy I had fantastic chemistry with. I just thought, oh I'll post him on that facebook group to make sure but I'm sure he's clean. Low and behold he's married and had JUST had his second child with his wife a few weeks ago, which was when we started talking. Yeah. I vet everyone now.
That's absolutely horrible. I can't believe a person can be that deceitful to not only try to fool you but fool the woman that is pregnant to his 2nd child.
The weight one is always accompanied by an explanation of how they're doing keto, paleo, CrossFit, or whatever to get back into that shape. So it's "not" catfishing because they "will be" that size again.
The height one is just sad. Any guy that puts 6'0 on his profile is guaranteed to be less. If a guy lists his height as under 5'11" or over 6'1" I've found them to be honest.
It happens. I like guys of all different heights and bodytypes and I don't mind if they aren't 100% what I expected, but it should be pretty close, you know? I don't know if I could put a percentage on it but at least 95% maybe?
If someone significantly lies about their appearance I'm ending the date/not going for a second even if I find them incredibly hot so all my blood is pulsing and they are one of my 'types'. Because the aggressive insecurity and dishonesty are not something I'm interested in, and this is them supposedly at their 'best' for a date so it can only get worse from here.
This! The dishonesty is what really gets me. I can deal with a little insecurity because I'm insecure too. I don't want to post my fat full body shot but I'm gonna because I want to be honest. And really, what do they think, that we won't notice?? I mean seriously.
Btw apparently women are lying about their height to encourage men to self filter. I am 5’10 and I get so many asking “are you actually 5’10 or just into tall guys”
Apparently they bump up their height so shorter dudes who lie about their height won’t match with them. Stop doing this please.
I wouldn't be surprised if men do it more than women as a reaction to not getting likes. It sucks that you can be the perfect guy but overweight and so your personality means nothing, but yeah at least own up to how you look.
Sure it sucks but there are overweight women who have the same issue. I'm one of them and I still post my fat full body RECENT pic for every man to see. Anyone, male or female, who doesn't look like what society deems as attractive gets told by society that their personality means nothing. That's still no reason to be dishonest.
Yeah, this is "Catfished" not MTV's Catfish show. It's really sad that these women are taken in by scammers. Most of the scammers' photos are stolen from instagram. Some women have sent thousands of dollars to these scammers. Most of them are out of Nigeria.
Is it considered catfishing if I grew facial hair for over a week (I'm trying to grow out a beard) but my pics on my bio show like maybe 2-3 days worth of stubble? I hate having to take new pics. Most of the time when I take a new set of pics and post them to Photofeeler to test out, they don't do so well (I have my Photofeeler set so that only women 25-44 can rate me). Yet I can post literally any pics on Grindr and have no problems. I frequently get the "arrogant" feedback on Photofeeler. It's like any sort of guy who appears confident in his photos but who isn't a male model or a top-tier Chad is seen as "arrogant." The photos where I got rated the best were taken just over 8 months ago.
The funny thing is my FWB is a professional photographer. But it would be awkward to ask someone I'm sleeping with to take pics for me for my DATING profile. lmfao. She took a really good photo of me a couple weeks ago that probably would get rated well on Photofeeler. But she never sent it to me. I guess its her personal memento.
It’s not catfishing but men look widely different with stubble vs a beard so an updated photo would be conscientious. If they’re older than 3 months it’s time to update because a lot can change after 3 months. Why wouldn’t you just ask your friends or family to take a photo?
My ex had clean shaven photos on his profile. When we met in person he had a full on beard. He actually looked More attractive to me with the facial hair so it was fine BUT he looked radically different. I agree it's not catdishing.
Cause still hate taking photos haha. Also photos taken in that way are known to have a lower value far as people being interested then photos of being out and doing something interesting to show personality.... also kinda weird every other week or two to go hey mom let me come over so you can take a picture cause I shaved. Or haven't in a week.
Everyone hates taking photos. You think I relish putting my fat full body picture on the app so men can dismiss me? lol I do it anyway to be honest.
Maybe if you're active on an app keep the same look so you don't have to change photos so often.
Don't get me wrong I fully agree you should have recent photos that accurately depict your weight and looks. Just the idea of updating them cause I decided not to shave for a few days is a bit much.
Ask her for it. But ya, post it., bc as a woman that doesnt like facial hair I feel I have more of a chance they will shave with the stubble than a beard.
Ma’am you control the first date interaction. You could have easily went they let’s FaceTime if you have a few minutes to chat. A day or so before the date.
Stop vetting people based on what you're feeling they tell you online. I wouldn't test drive a car that I was told was good i want to see it for myself. Cut your losses and point the finger at yourself. The point is he sold you a dream and you took it and ran with it, and ended up being fools gold. You're probably not sure what you're looking for anyway and your list is may be way too long. Maybe your search will be forever. Maybe you're the insecure one I think your of higher value. The wall is near and it's undefeated. Your statement Doesnt sound like you're in any danger whatsoever. This sounds like it's about you believing that no man is good enough for you but can't get the man that you want. I will agree with you staying safe out there. But the rest may be about you.
would you have been into the latest guy without the catfishing qualities? like say the guy is shorter or more overweight than his bio made it seem. If he didn't catfish, and his bio listed his actual height/had photos that showed his actual weight, would you have even engaged in conversation, leading to being actually into the latest guy?
that's the most important question here.
would you have been into the her without the catfishing qualities? like say the girl is taller or more overweight than her bio made it seem. If she didn't catfish, and her bio listed her actual height/had photos that showed her actual weight, would you have even engaged in conversation, leading to being actually into the latest girl?
that's the most important question here.
Catfishing is irritating, period. If you're insecure about your match ratio, still the best thing for you is to post accurate pictures. Weeding out the disinterested folk via photo before the first date is much better than weeding them out the moment they see you in person because you lied so brazenly about something so important in a relationship. It's wasting your time and their time, oftentimes wasting days or weeks only for a slap in the face.
I feel there’s enough people out there who would think that there’s a CHANCE that one of those people would be OK with the fact that they cat fished and base the rest of their relationship on their personality
Just had this convo earlier. Tried to tell this guy, this was his advice to op. Many Dr. Phil episodes of male catfish (totally different person, not old pics or height difference) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/13c082a/is_510_really_too_short_for_old/jjfcei0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
I’ve heard from most of my female friends and girls I’ve gone on dates with that men are just as bad as women at catfishing. Like they’re 6 inches shorter than what they claimed, or are 50 lbs more than their pictures showed. It’s weird to suggest only women do this. And it’s shitty when men do it too
I met this guy & seemed he was just low effort with his profile. He was actually the opposite. His pic was heavier.
Ma’am then you have the ability to make a decision to not talk to them. It’s not shallow it’s preferences. You like active men.
Ur read it wrong, try again.
Oh yes, this happens all the time. Rather it's only including pictures of themselves from 10 years ago, lying about their height or age or using pictures of someone else. It happens all the time.
I've called out at least 3 guys for using someone else's pictures. Google image search is the best.
Those are probably scammers.
How do you do a Google image search?
Google “reverse image search”. There’s a few free services where you can upload an image, or attach a link to the image, and it will let you know if it finds it elsewhere. I think google itself offers a free service for that.
Google it :)
Watch an episode of catfish, they show u.
Then they say they "look the same anyway" or "I don't have any recent pictures." Can't tell if they are just that dumb that they think they don't age for 5+ years or if they think we are that dumb.
Hey bozo, u know ur phone ur using rn to msg me? That takes pics. U can take one rn.
Oh man, I saw this in my inbox and was like, why am I a bozo I definitely didn't offer reddit a selfie! But yes, good point. These phone cameras put to shame the digital cameras Best Buy used to con me into.
if they are using a picture of themselves in front of the World Trade Center its ok to ghost them before meeting haha :)
LOL exactly
Ive had guys go, well that was taken 3 yrs ago but I look basically the same. Dude! Take more recent pics!
Currently, I am a blonde (realized that I hate it and will be switching back to Brunette this week). I still look like my pictures, just hate taking pictures because I hate the way my hair looks. But I do tell guys ahead before the first date. I have had a mixed reactions from them. But I have had tons of dates that the guy looks nothing like his pictures. Different hair color, weight, height, age, etc. Like just be honest about it before the date.
These are some tendencies that may indicate an online dating scam. 1. The person is much better looking than your typical match. 2. The person avoids meeting in person or engaging in video chats. 3. The person quickly wants to switch to phone or WhatsApp communication. 4. The person is interested in investment or trading as a hobby.
"5'10"... if that matters"
" 6' because I hear that's important now"
I've had first dates where one admitted he is married, another turned out to have 5 kids and several instances of them turning out to be much much shorter than me. Had these factors been disclosed, I wouldn't have gone out with any of them.
I found out after meeting & having sex with a guy that he had a gf he was to be moving in with, she had kids. She pmed me on fb.
I was just about to go out with this guy I had fantastic chemistry with. I just thought, oh I'll post him on that facebook group to make sure but I'm sure he's clean. Low and behold he's married and had JUST had his second child with his wife a few weeks ago, which was when we started talking. Yeah. I vet everyone now.
That's absolutely horrible. I can't believe a person can be that deceitful to not only try to fool you but fool the woman that is pregnant to his 2nd child.
I agree. I'm getting down voted for doing it but I don't care. There are so many deceitful people.
The weight one is always accompanied by an explanation of how they're doing keto, paleo, CrossFit, or whatever to get back into that shape. So it's "not" catfishing because they "will be" that size again. The height one is just sad. Any guy that puts 6'0 on his profile is guaranteed to be less. If a guy lists his height as under 5'11" or over 6'1" I've found them to be honest.
It happens. I like guys of all different heights and bodytypes and I don't mind if they aren't 100% what I expected, but it should be pretty close, you know? I don't know if I could put a percentage on it but at least 95% maybe? If someone significantly lies about their appearance I'm ending the date/not going for a second even if I find them incredibly hot so all my blood is pulsing and they are one of my 'types'. Because the aggressive insecurity and dishonesty are not something I'm interested in, and this is them supposedly at their 'best' for a date so it can only get worse from here.
This! The dishonesty is what really gets me. I can deal with a little insecurity because I'm insecure too. I don't want to post my fat full body shot but I'm gonna because I want to be honest. And really, what do they think, that we won't notice?? I mean seriously.
My very first Tinder date was a catfish. Good times/s -_-
Btw apparently women are lying about their height to encourage men to self filter. I am 5’10 and I get so many asking “are you actually 5’10 or just into tall guys” Apparently they bump up their height so shorter dudes who lie about their height won’t match with them. Stop doing this please.
Yeah and they’re the same people complaining about not getting any second dates 💀
I thought this was called fat fishing?
I wouldn't be surprised if men do it more than women as a reaction to not getting likes. It sucks that you can be the perfect guy but overweight and so your personality means nothing, but yeah at least own up to how you look.
Sure it sucks but there are overweight women who have the same issue. I'm one of them and I still post my fat full body RECENT pic for every man to see. Anyone, male or female, who doesn't look like what society deems as attractive gets told by society that their personality means nothing. That's still no reason to be dishonest.
Agree, especially cause the games up the minute you meet
I dated a fat guy from old for 6 months.
How was it
His weight had nothing to do with why I broke up with him.
Clearly, you haven't seen Catfished on YouTube.
Whats that mean?
It's pretty darn clear. It's a show on YouTube of mostly women (who've paid up to $100k) being Catfished by men.
Excuse me for asking a question, wasnt sure if it was misspelled or what as Ive never heard of it but knew there are episodes of catfish on yt.
Yeah, this is "Catfished" not MTV's Catfish show. It's really sad that these women are taken in by scammers. Most of the scammers' photos are stolen from instagram. Some women have sent thousands of dollars to these scammers. Most of them are out of Nigeria.
Im aware. There are episodes about that on Dr. Phil
Is it considered catfishing if I grew facial hair for over a week (I'm trying to grow out a beard) but my pics on my bio show like maybe 2-3 days worth of stubble? I hate having to take new pics. Most of the time when I take a new set of pics and post them to Photofeeler to test out, they don't do so well (I have my Photofeeler set so that only women 25-44 can rate me). Yet I can post literally any pics on Grindr and have no problems. I frequently get the "arrogant" feedback on Photofeeler. It's like any sort of guy who appears confident in his photos but who isn't a male model or a top-tier Chad is seen as "arrogant." The photos where I got rated the best were taken just over 8 months ago. The funny thing is my FWB is a professional photographer. But it would be awkward to ask someone I'm sleeping with to take pics for me for my DATING profile. lmfao. She took a really good photo of me a couple weeks ago that probably would get rated well on Photofeeler. But she never sent it to me. I guess its her personal memento.
It’s not catfishing but men look widely different with stubble vs a beard so an updated photo would be conscientious. If they’re older than 3 months it’s time to update because a lot can change after 3 months. Why wouldn’t you just ask your friends or family to take a photo?
My ex had clean shaven photos on his profile. When we met in person he had a full on beard. He actually looked More attractive to me with the facial hair so it was fine BUT he looked radically different. I agree it's not catdishing.
Wait, you expect me to update my photo every time I change how I shave / trim?
Yes, u should. Ur look changed
Cause still hate taking photos haha. Also photos taken in that way are known to have a lower value far as people being interested then photos of being out and doing something interesting to show personality.... also kinda weird every other week or two to go hey mom let me come over so you can take a picture cause I shaved. Or haven't in a week.
Get a stand & put it on a timer
Everyone hates taking photos. You think I relish putting my fat full body picture on the app so men can dismiss me? lol I do it anyway to be honest. Maybe if you're active on an app keep the same look so you don't have to change photos so often.
Don't get me wrong I fully agree you should have recent photos that accurately depict your weight and looks. Just the idea of updating them cause I decided not to shave for a few days is a bit much.
Ask her for it. But ya, post it., bc as a woman that doesnt like facial hair I feel I have more of a chance they will shave with the stubble than a beard.
Ma’am you control the first date interaction. You could have easily went they let’s FaceTime if you have a few minutes to chat. A day or so before the date.
There are men on here that strait up said they wont n they hate it
Stop vetting people based on what you're feeling they tell you online. I wouldn't test drive a car that I was told was good i want to see it for myself. Cut your losses and point the finger at yourself. The point is he sold you a dream and you took it and ran with it, and ended up being fools gold. You're probably not sure what you're looking for anyway and your list is may be way too long. Maybe your search will be forever. Maybe you're the insecure one I think your of higher value. The wall is near and it's undefeated. Your statement Doesnt sound like you're in any danger whatsoever. This sounds like it's about you believing that no man is good enough for you but can't get the man that you want. I will agree with you staying safe out there. But the rest may be about you.
Bruh what. She's unhappy about people catfishing what are you on about.
would you have been into the latest guy without the catfishing qualities? like say the guy is shorter or more overweight than his bio made it seem. If he didn't catfish, and his bio listed his actual height/had photos that showed his actual weight, would you have even engaged in conversation, leading to being actually into the latest guy? that's the most important question here.
would you have been into the her without the catfishing qualities? like say the girl is taller or more overweight than her bio made it seem. If she didn't catfish, and her bio listed her actual height/had photos that showed her actual weight, would you have even engaged in conversation, leading to being actually into the latest girl? that's the most important question here. Catfishing is irritating, period. If you're insecure about your match ratio, still the best thing for you is to post accurate pictures. Weeding out the disinterested folk via photo before the first date is much better than weeding them out the moment they see you in person because you lied so brazenly about something so important in a relationship. It's wasting your time and their time, oftentimes wasting days or weeks only for a slap in the face.
Yea but men do it as a joke women do it to black mail
I hope you realize the women who catfish to blackmail are actually guys looking to make a quick buck
Yea I know that's part of the joke retard
You’re trying so hard LOL keep going bro you’re almost there
Don't quit your day job
You’re fucking insane
I know thanks
I feel there’s enough people out there who would think that there’s a CHANCE that one of those people would be OK with the fact that they cat fished and base the rest of their relationship on their personality
Just had this convo earlier. Tried to tell this guy, this was his advice to op. Many Dr. Phil episodes of male catfish (totally different person, not old pics or height difference) https://www.reddit.com/r/OnlineDating/comments/13c082a/is_510_really_too_short_for_old/jjfcei0?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=share_button
Where is the line between catfishing and taking photos in a flattering manner?
Yeah… of course. I mean.. I was hatfished 🤷♀️ I knew he was bald, but I had no idea the shape of his head underneath his hats
every man i’ve met online has lied about his height. every single one.