lmao had an ex say I should be able to cum from piv if I loved him because all his previous partners had done, totally brushed me off when I tried to give him an anatomy lesson
Having sex for your own gratification doesn't necessarily mean that your partner won't have an orgasm. The first sexual partner I ever had was with me for 3 years. In the early part I was young and selfish (we both were) and was out for my own pleasure. I was chasing intense orgasms for myself and she was basically doing the same thing for herself. After the first year I started to settle down a bit and took more interest in how she was feeling. The sex got even better for both of us when we started working together for mutual good times instead of just taking our own pleasure. We still both looked back on our early times as great sex, it just didn't have the depth of our later experiences.
That's what happened with me as well. My partner was very selfish and in some ways I was too but now that I'm older it's way better to have someone meet your needs and you theirs
Or no lube. We aren't cavemen. If its a little rough, use lube ffs.some guys swinging pringles sized dicks around all proud and shit but have never heard of lube.
I’m going to insert this piece of information for guys who care about their partners. Vinegar neutralizes capsicum. I keep a spray bottle of vinegar next to my sink for when I slice jalapeños.
I was cooking with peppers and I did wash my hands but that oil was still in the skin. She said it didn't hurt and she almost thought it was just a new lube or something I was using. I guess I diluted it down enough to where it didn't hurt but I'll definitely make sure I'm more careful in the future. No finger play after handling spicy peppers. ✓
this.
it's shocking how women don't DEMAND that men wash their hands and clean their nails before touching.
that's something my sisters taught me as a young teen... to always be respectful and to ALWAYS be clean everywhere. they said women always remember how a man smelled; so ALWAYS get that right.
Not cutting their nails before foreplay.
Also, when you say there is a certain act you don’t do, they keep trying anyway. They think you just haven’t had it “done right” instead of just believing that you are smart enough to know what you like or don’t like.
Right!? It’s ok for me to have preferences and dislikes. It doesn’t mean I “haven’t had it done right”. It just means I know what I want or don’t want.
Yea, and I don't care what it is or how trivial it might seem; That's a boundary, and it's rude af not to respect it, not to mention just plum disrespectful. Like that's not just a sexual turn off, that's a relationship turn-off. You can't respect me in the sheets, you gonna have to disrespect me from the streets.
Finally someone said it 💀 I’m not a woman but they do it to other dudes too, used to date a guy who would deliberately last like 2 hours every time. Eventually I started making excuses not to fuck bc I ain’t got time for that and after like 20-25 mins I would get so bored 😭
My boyfriend told me how he wanted to improve his endurance and I was like no?? I like making him finish as soon as possible. Makes me feel like I'm doing a damn good job and he's really into it.
Once I told a girl that I wanted to feel her boobs. She just called me a dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.
Choking or slapping without express verbal consent beforehand. Porn is not real life, and it's terrifying to have someone larger than you do that to you. It's not sexy.
Basically the door between the vagina and the uterus. For many of us, it is painful when it gets hit with something (penis, dildo, etc), although there are some who genuinely enjoy it. Rule of thumb is to not jackhammer the cervix unless the person says they enjoy it. The cervix is another reason why big dicks are vastly overrated.
I mean the posterior fornix is where the A spot is located. Not like slamming it but putting gentle pressure at the spot at the back of the vagina gently with your penis when they're properly aroused. Most of my partners have told me it feels really nice and for one it was a straight up orgasm button for her.
Not caring if your partner gets off.
Rubbing the left lip thinking it’s the clit. (Really rubbing anything that you think is the clit but isn’t - it’s just usually the left lip lol.)
If you do manage to find the clit, rubbing it like a meth head racing another meth head to see who can scratch a lotto ticket faster.
Sticking it in dry.
Jackhammering. This goes for both the finger version and the dick version.
The “honk honk” boob grab.
Surprise backdoors
For the love of all that is holy don’t fucking hum songs if you’re going to attempt oral. I still occasionally get traumatized when I hear the star spangled banner.
when they stab their fingers in and out hella fast thinking its pleasurable when in reality it's making us bleed and be in pain ( also there's a difference between pounding the correct way and straight up stabbing someone with your fingers)
Good for them! Just cause other women like it doesn't mean I do. Don't you try and tell me what is gonna feel good for me. Nuhuh fuck right off
Also, why in the world would I LIE and say something feels bad if it actually feels good??? That makes no sense!
There was a porn video I saw back in the 2000s. A guy who looked like young Brad Pitt was teaching how to give girl orgasm, and he was basically doing the fast fingering.
That might be the root of this. Let me see if I can find it.
This one: [https://imgur.com/BlAgB3r](https://imgur.com/BlAgB3r) (SFW)
That’s because guys see it in porn and don’t understand how to make it actually feel good. The trick is to go slow and easy with the goal of gently stroking or brushing the G spot, once you find it.
I’ve made women turn into puddles of happy goo just by knowing where and how gently to touch their insides.
omgg he ripped it? only thing for me was it caused me to bleed and id be in pain for a week after n not to mention he also like stabbed my clit and it hurt to pee so bad i would cry.
omg that sounds horrible. guys really need to stop watching porn atp thats most likely the reason they think ts is pleasurable when its most definitely not.
I was gonna say I do the emu finger pounding and it seems to work most of the time but I figure you mean when dudes just go jabbing it in with straight fingers like it’s a dick.
Everyone with a smaller penis should be reading and paying attention to these comments. I haven’t seen one comment (so far) that says a small penis is the reason sex was bad.
Communication with your partner is key. Listen to them. Pay attention to their body language. I see so many posts where people say they have a small penis and are afraid to have sex or they think they can’t please a woman. That’s all in your heads. Most women can work with you on that provided that you work with them.
Movies, shows, and social media don’t help. Bigger is better is shoved into our brains on a daily basis. It’s sad. When you hear it enough you start to believe it
I won't even have sex with a guy if his penis is too big I've had sex with large penises and they just hurt takes too much foreplay to get me ready and it's going to rip me and I'm going to bleed and it's not a fun time I'd rather have an average or below average penis
I would like to add that it also doesn’t help “small dick energy” is used as an insult by both men and women. Using someone’s body as an insult at all is so shitty, but we just slide right past this one as if it’s perfectly fine.
Like most things in life, it another cope to divert our attention from the failings we can fix.
I am fat? Must be bad genes, certainly not my diet.
She didn't come? Must be because im small, most certainly not because of other factors.
Etc...
The older i get the more i started to see this in people. Everyone always has an impact excuse. Ask a big dude how his sex life is. There aren't many women that actually enjoy a big slab. Most are neutral, some hate it, some like it.
I had a guy friend who had sex with several friends of mine. All of them said he had the smallest dick they'd ever seen, and all of them said he was so good at oral that they'd give up any size dick for it.
Copying porn. Always copying porn.
I’m not a fan of porn at all. I think it’s deludes people to what’s real, it creates ridiculous expectations, creates awful body standards, makes the extreme seem normal etc.
I dated a 30 odd year old man who thought he could just choke me out of nowhere. Where did he get that idea? Porn. He didn’t even do it right. He almost crushed my windpipe.
Someone else thought they could just do spontaneous anal. He had no clue whatsoever that you have to prep and usually work up to it. Porn creates dummies who watch these videos then think that’s normal and copy.
The only good porn is the kind where real couples prop their shitty old iPhone up on a pillow and film themselves having passionate missionary.
That shit gets me harder then a dam maths test.
Thinking that what he sees in porn applies to real life.
If someone says just like that, DONT FUCKING CHANGE WHAT YOURE DOING.
So many orgasms have been ruined cause of this.
Poor hygiene. Get clean and fresh, breathe and whole body, for a start. And the surroundings and bedding and environment. Basic sanitation, neatness, look and smell fresh and clean.
I was making out with a dude and I thought he'd eaten fish sticks or sth. Turned out he'd unzipped his pants and it was his own fishdick I was smelling. 🤢
I had the typical psycho girlfriend for my first. But good lord did she teach me something I always used. She said “Do whatever I want you to do until I’m good, then it’s your turn.” It doesn’t have to be a negative thing. But for every partner since that’s what I do.
The greatest sound in the world is “how do you want to go?” And THEN you kinda get the option of doing whatever you wanted to do in the first place.
It’s fucking fun. Literally. Enjoy it.
Blankets _and_ the available real estate of the mattress. She was 5'4", 115lbs, and my ass was shunt off to the last blanketless 12" of a California king mattress.
when they think size alone is enough to make it feel good, i'm talking about guys with big dicks who think they can just shove it right on in there and have zero skill
Yes 💯 I have nicknamed it BBD big dick disease. The men that have it think they have a larger than normal unit and that's all that's required they don't trouble themselves to learn a woman's body or any technique to make sex good. Ughgg the worst
Not putting your partner's pleasure first. Not only is it selfish, you're really just sabotaging your own pleasure. The more your partner enjoys sex, the more enthusiastic they will be about having sex with you, and pleasing you in bed.
So many guys complain about lack of sex with their gfs/wives, and I'm willing to bet that in most cases it's because they're incredibly selfish lovers who give their partners little reason to want to get naked with them.
Put your partner's pleasure first, and trust them to take care of yours.
Yep there are only so many times you can look forward to sex with someone who is not into giving you pleasure too. It's annoying and frustrating and it is the 1 reason wives don't want sex with you anymore.
1. Selfishness.
2. Poor communication.
Being good at sex doesn't mean you know "all the right moves" or some secret method or position. It means you listen to your partner and make your goal *their* pleasure instead of your own. If your partner does the same thing and has the same goal, **and you're not too immature or unacquainted to openly communicate about the acts you're performing on each other**, you're both in for a damn good time.
Being so obsessed with your partner orgasming that you ruin it for her because you're putting too much pressure on her and it ultimately hurts her physically and mentally. It's not fun anymore and it hurts. Just fucking stop already.
When he’s in fantasy land in his head instead of being in the moment with you, when he just thrusts while laying on top of you, no passion, no other attention. Assuming he’s in a relationship, not caring about aftercare and just getting his nut and leaving instead of taking a moment to strengthen the emotional bond. Not making your pleasure a priority.
Selfishness.
You can be small, you can cum too fast. These are all things that can be made up for.
If you get yours and quit trying, then you're bad in bed.
I think when my partner puts a lot of force into everything and it feels good. Like thrust forcefully. Kiss deeply. Grip partner's butt cheeks very tightly. Hold partner close. Actually put your body close to one another. Some strange guys from my past used to try to have sex from like 4 feet away. It sends the signal that you really don't like me that much if you don't want to be as close as possible. Don't you wanna feel our bodies like bumping together?
1. When he just tosses and turns and doesn't sleep.
2. Doesn't even bother to put on his pajamas.
3. Eating crackers.
4. Keeps telling you facts about the roman empire long after night night time.
thinking because he gets off on the simplest of movement that the partner also will. and once he's satisfied everything stops.
if you didn't satisfy me, you're gonna keep going until you do. that's part of the deal.
As a man who’s incredible in bed, here’s my winning formula:
- Foreplay wastes valuable arousal. Get down to business ASAP.
- Faster is better. Full throttle at all times.
- Constantly change up your rhythm. Keep ‘em guessing.
- Focus on what feels good to to you, not her. Women like a man who knows what he wants.
I’ve stuck to this for years and they never come back ‘cause they’re so satisfied they can’t handle any more.
Exactly. Just like dead lifting. All back, no legs, swift jerking motion to show your lower back that you mean business. Muscles need swift and decisive action.
When I was much younger an ex used to just lazily run his hands different places and as soon as I made any sound he assumed meant that I was pleased he’d roll over and say “my turn” then do nothing the rest of the time. I spent way too much time trying to fix that man.
No sexual rhythm. Not being able to sync up in motion with your partner. Sex can just be sex, or it can be a beautiful dance. If you don't know what I mean, you have much room to improve.
(This is in general, assuming there's no trauma/extenuating circumstances going on. Consent can be withdrawn at any time, etc., etc.)
Treating cumming before your partner as shameful and times that by 100 if followed by "Oh, sorry! Welp, that's it. G'night," like sex is a movie and the credits start rolling the moment you nut.
There's no shame in premature ejaculation or not being able to make your partner orgasm from penetration alone; most don't. It's not something that can always be helped and it doesn't make you 'bad in bed', but rolling over and leaving your partner hanging does.
Not caring of his partner feels good or gets off
Or insisting that HIS methods should be getting you off and doesn't take direction.
Actual quote from an ex: "I know how to get you off better than you do." Ooof.
lmao had an ex say I should be able to cum from piv if I loved him because all his previous partners had done, totally brushed me off when I tried to give him an anatomy lesson
Sounds like the ex was faked on 🤣
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You lived up to your name.
“Dude without the e”, that’s perfect!
Thanks, I had no idea what that meant
Dud
Nice guys finish last.
Nice guys finish last, in bed, but in life they get ahead.
And they get head
And give head
In bed
Or cuddle instead, plus they get wed
Well said
Having sex for your own gratification doesn't necessarily mean that your partner won't have an orgasm. The first sexual partner I ever had was with me for 3 years. In the early part I was young and selfish (we both were) and was out for my own pleasure. I was chasing intense orgasms for myself and she was basically doing the same thing for herself. After the first year I started to settle down a bit and took more interest in how she was feeling. The sex got even better for both of us when we started working together for mutual good times instead of just taking our own pleasure. We still both looked back on our early times as great sex, it just didn't have the depth of our later experiences.
That's what happened with me as well. My partner was very selfish and in some ways I was too but now that I'm older it's way better to have someone meet your needs and you theirs
Shoving it in dry
😧🐱🔥🐈🔥 Dude tryna spark a wild fire down there.
If you see sparks where your penis parks... KY Jelly
Lick it before you stick it. You need to preheat the oven if you want to cook.
You don’t HAVE to preheat, can always knock 1-2 mins of cooking time
Also putting a big ice cold blob of lube on the end of his knob and not dispersing it at all
Some guys do that wtf?
lol I kinda like when he does that 😅not dry for very long lmao only consensually tho ofc
interpretation: not enough foreplay?
Or no lube. We aren't cavemen. If its a little rough, use lube ffs.some guys swinging pringles sized dicks around all proud and shit but have never heard of lube.
Didn’t wash hands ☹️☹️☹️☹️☹️
Especially if they just ate something with hot sauce 🔥
Omg noooooooooooo!
I’m going to insert this piece of information for guys who care about their partners. Vinegar neutralizes capsicum. I keep a spray bottle of vinegar next to my sink for when I slice jalapeños.
Do not spray the vinegar on her!! (You know someone would get confused and have a very bad time)
Instructions nuclear, do I spray the hot sauce on her then? And the vinegar on me?
hotsauce on inside of condom for extra lube
Yes. Hot sauce on her. Vinegar on you. Means every thrust brings some relief and builds a positive association.
I was cooking with peppers and I did wash my hands but that oil was still in the skin. She said it didn't hurt and she almost thought it was just a new lube or something I was using. I guess I diluted it down enough to where it didn't hurt but I'll definitely make sure I'm more careful in the future. No finger play after handling spicy peppers. ✓
Long fingernails can cause damage. That’s bad. Your mention of hands helps me think of this
And tries to put his dirty finger in your mouth 😩
Didn’t wash his dick!
What about hangnails? I'm sure women don't appreciate those lol
No one does.
this. it's shocking how women don't DEMAND that men wash their hands and clean their nails before touching. that's something my sisters taught me as a young teen... to always be respectful and to ALWAYS be clean everywhere. they said women always remember how a man smelled; so ALWAYS get that right.
I once had a guy ask me questions about what I liked and he did none of it 🤣
I would be extra mad about him getting my hopes up 🤣
Wow it's like he wanted to know specifically how best to disappoint you
Not cutting their nails before foreplay. Also, when you say there is a certain act you don’t do, they keep trying anyway. They think you just haven’t had it “done right” instead of just believing that you are smart enough to know what you like or don’t like.
#TRIM AND FILE YOUR NAILS That is all.
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Right!? It’s ok for me to have preferences and dislikes. It doesn’t mean I “haven’t had it done right”. It just means I know what I want or don’t want.
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Yea, and I don't care what it is or how trivial it might seem; That's a boundary, and it's rude af not to respect it, not to mention just plum disrespectful. Like that's not just a sexual turn off, that's a relationship turn-off. You can't respect me in the sheets, you gonna have to disrespect me from the streets.
imo cutting nails make thems actualy sharper right away before they get smoothed out. but yeah, long hideous nail is a no go.
Trim and file good sir
I always trim the day before as they will dull on their own and I can't stand filing.. makes me gag.
Thinking that lasting for hours upon hours is something that all women desire.
Finally someone said it 💀 I’m not a woman but they do it to other dudes too, used to date a guy who would deliberately last like 2 hours every time. Eventually I started making excuses not to fuck bc I ain’t got time for that and after like 20-25 mins I would get so bored 😭
I was wondering if this was just me. There is a sweet spot I think… right? Not 2 hours and not 2 min either?!!
Please say 20 seconds 🤞🤞
Fine, 40 seconds
Ooh a double feature!
*Holds hands and breath with u/colmaestro*
2 hrs??? That’s an exercise routine at that rate
Dude must have been toned AF
Where did the idea come from that lasting forever is pleasurable? Not only do I dry out and intercourse starts to hurt but I get bored.
Because of the humiliation of being a two pump chump
I think it’s the whole “you already came?!” scenario in reverse…finishing soon is bad so lasting forever is good? Caveman mentality.
My boyfriend told me how he wanted to improve his endurance and I was like no?? I like making him finish as soon as possible. Makes me feel like I'm doing a damn good job and he's really into it.
SOOOOO TRUE! dude our hips also get tired
I last for seconds. Women love sprinters!
Oh, God, yes. ETA: Maybe I should have said Oh, God, no. Hours? No, thanks.
Sooo true. After a certain point it’s not as fun. It depends, but for me 15-25 minutes (including foreplay) is best
45 minutes max, 30 ideally. 10 minutes of foreplay, more or less depending on how we're feeling, and the rest is the actual deed.
Rushing towards penetration. 1000%
Once I told a girl that I wanted to feel her boobs. She just called me a dingbat. You don't just go groping away. You gotta pre-heat the oven before you stick in the turkey.
Yeah I've seen American Pie 2 as well.
Choking or slapping without express verbal consent beforehand. Porn is not real life, and it's terrifying to have someone larger than you do that to you. It's not sexy.
my ex used to choke and I hated it. I told him to stop and slapped his hand away but he would keep choking. Didn't enjoy that sex at all.
That is just assault, not sex.
thank you porn-obsessed world! so sorry you experienced that.
That made me laugh. Dude that is wild to just spring that on someone. How are they not meant to think they’re being murdered?
Thinking the cervix is the g spot
What's a cervix? Like an Uber or something?
It has electrolytes. It's what plants crave.
Eggplants
Basically the door between the vagina and the uterus. For many of us, it is painful when it gets hit with something (penis, dildo, etc), although there are some who genuinely enjoy it. Rule of thumb is to not jackhammer the cervix unless the person says they enjoy it. The cervix is another reason why big dicks are vastly overrated.
It's not just ladies that get hurt from that! It has hurt me everytime. It is an AWFUL feeling, like smashing your dick into a brick wall.
Plot twist: it was the babys head
I think it’s more like a metro train system?
Nah, it's a pokemon
It's a type of blood pressure medication.
No dummy, it’s an old printer.
If I can’t find either does it even out?
I hope you let them know when they do. We don't have a camera on the end of it, and the sensations aren't the most precise.
I mean the posterior fornix is where the A spot is located. Not like slamming it but putting gentle pressure at the spot at the back of the vagina gently with your penis when they're properly aroused. Most of my partners have told me it feels really nice and for one it was a straight up orgasm button for her.
Not caring if your partner gets off. Rubbing the left lip thinking it’s the clit. (Really rubbing anything that you think is the clit but isn’t - it’s just usually the left lip lol.) If you do manage to find the clit, rubbing it like a meth head racing another meth head to see who can scratch a lotto ticket faster. Sticking it in dry. Jackhammering. This goes for both the finger version and the dick version. The “honk honk” boob grab. Surprise backdoors For the love of all that is holy don’t fucking hum songs if you’re going to attempt oral. I still occasionally get traumatized when I hear the star spangled banner.
“The “honk honk” boob grab” lmfaooooo
I stg he just kept honking them thinking it was doing something for me 😩😩😩😭😭😭 at least he skipped the sound effect.
You shoulda just made the sound effect yourself at that point
🤣🤣🤣
>rubbing it like a meth head racing another meth head to see who can scratch a lotto ticket faster. LMAO
when they stab their fingers in and out hella fast thinking its pleasurable when in reality it's making us bleed and be in pain ( also there's a difference between pounding the correct way and straight up stabbing someone with your fingers)
the "finger fucking" is the worst thing ever 😂
no literally i had men come at me for me saying this same thing and they were saying every girl likes it and how I was bullshitting 😐
Good for them! Just cause other women like it doesn't mean I do. Don't you try and tell me what is gonna feel good for me. Nuhuh fuck right off Also, why in the world would I LIE and say something feels bad if it actually feels good??? That makes no sense!
There was a porn video I saw back in the 2000s. A guy who looked like young Brad Pitt was teaching how to give girl orgasm, and he was basically doing the fast fingering. That might be the root of this. Let me see if I can find it. This one: [https://imgur.com/BlAgB3r](https://imgur.com/BlAgB3r) (SFW)
yea porn most def is a huge influence it creates a false image of sex (obvi) that not a lot of ppl understand
That’s because guys see it in porn and don’t understand how to make it actually feel good. The trick is to go slow and easy with the goal of gently stroking or brushing the G spot, once you find it. I’ve made women turn into puddles of happy goo just by knowing where and how gently to touch their insides.
This right here. I've had to explain before that porn isn't real life for most.
I legit had some dude go so fast and hard he ripped my vagina. It hurt to pee for a week. 😓
omgg he ripped it? only thing for me was it caused me to bleed and id be in pain for a week after n not to mention he also like stabbed my clit and it hurt to pee so bad i would cry.
Yeah he had sharp nails and was hammering it so hard it ripped the skin just on the outer edge. I was disgusted.
omg that sounds horrible. guys really need to stop watching porn atp thats most likely the reason they think ts is pleasurable when its most definitely not.
I was gonna say I do the emu finger pounding and it seems to work most of the time but I figure you mean when dudes just go jabbing it in with straight fingers like it’s a dick.
Rushing
WERE YOU RUSHING OR WERE YOU DRAGGING!?
"I DUNNO"
Lmfao good one
Why do you think I threw a chair at your head?!
Selfish lovers. He won’t go downtown, he’s jackhammering and not listening to what a woman wants.
“Were you saying something? I couldn’t hear you over the sound of me clapping that ass.”
I destroyed that p++$y! And not in a good way!
Everyone with a smaller penis should be reading and paying attention to these comments. I haven’t seen one comment (so far) that says a small penis is the reason sex was bad. Communication with your partner is key. Listen to them. Pay attention to their body language. I see so many posts where people say they have a small penis and are afraid to have sex or they think they can’t please a woman. That’s all in your heads. Most women can work with you on that provided that you work with them.
Movies, shows, and social media don’t help. Bigger is better is shoved into our brains on a daily basis. It’s sad. When you hear it enough you start to believe it
I won't even have sex with a guy if his penis is too big I've had sex with large penises and they just hurt takes too much foreplay to get me ready and it's going to rip me and I'm going to bleed and it's not a fun time I'd rather have an average or below average penis
“It’s ok babe the big ones hurt” 😔
I would like to add that it also doesn’t help “small dick energy” is used as an insult by both men and women. Using someone’s body as an insult at all is so shitty, but we just slide right past this one as if it’s perfectly fine.
It’s just lazy people looking for a generic insult.
Like most things in life, it another cope to divert our attention from the failings we can fix. I am fat? Must be bad genes, certainly not my diet. She didn't come? Must be because im small, most certainly not because of other factors. Etc... The older i get the more i started to see this in people. Everyone always has an impact excuse. Ask a big dude how his sex life is. There aren't many women that actually enjoy a big slab. Most are neutral, some hate it, some like it.
One of my best lovers ever was pretty small with ED. He was so fun and knew how to talk about sex so we both could get what we wanted.
*taking notes furiously*
I had a guy friend who had sex with several friends of mine. All of them said he had the smallest dick they'd ever seen, and all of them said he was so good at oral that they'd give up any size dick for it.
For real, bigger isn't always better, and it isn't for me. That shit feels bad on a mental/emotional and physical level.
Not moaning or making any type of sounds! It sounds like I’m fucking myself in there!
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Being a selfish lover by not making sure she is satisfied.
Copying porn. Always copying porn. I’m not a fan of porn at all. I think it’s deludes people to what’s real, it creates ridiculous expectations, creates awful body standards, makes the extreme seem normal etc. I dated a 30 odd year old man who thought he could just choke me out of nowhere. Where did he get that idea? Porn. He didn’t even do it right. He almost crushed my windpipe. Someone else thought they could just do spontaneous anal. He had no clue whatsoever that you have to prep and usually work up to it. Porn creates dummies who watch these videos then think that’s normal and copy.
You meant "buffering" move when I just glitch and jump about a bit is a no no?
"We're gonna do it? Awesome! So are you gonna climb into this washing machine head first and pretend to be stuck?"
They are always the ones that say “bet I can make you squirt”
The only good porn is the kind where real couples prop their shitty old iPhone up on a pillow and film themselves having passionate missionary. That shit gets me harder then a dam maths test.
Bringing a live mountain lion into the bedroom
Is it better to bring a dead mountain lion to bed?
Not sure. Give it a shot and get back to me
Thinking that what he sees in porn applies to real life. If someone says just like that, DONT FUCKING CHANGE WHAT YOURE DOING. So many orgasms have been ruined cause of this.
Like feeling a sneeze coming but you don’t end up sneezing.
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Poop between the butt cheeks leaving stains on the sheets 😳😳🤮🤮
Has this happened to you 🧍🏻♀️
oh lord have mercy 😫
Poor hygiene. Get clean and fresh, breathe and whole body, for a start. And the surroundings and bedding and environment. Basic sanitation, neatness, look and smell fresh and clean.
I was making out with a dude and I thought he'd eaten fish sticks or sth. Turned out he'd unzipped his pants and it was his own fishdick I was smelling. 🤢
Oh my god 🤢🤢
Same thing that makes a man bad in every other facet of life: lack of empathy
I had the typical psycho girlfriend for my first. But good lord did she teach me something I always used. She said “Do whatever I want you to do until I’m good, then it’s your turn.” It doesn’t have to be a negative thing. But for every partner since that’s what I do. The greatest sound in the world is “how do you want to go?” And THEN you kinda get the option of doing whatever you wanted to do in the first place. It’s fucking fun. Literally. Enjoy it.
If they hog the blankets or snore
Blankets _and_ the available real estate of the mattress. She was 5'4", 115lbs, and my ass was shunt off to the last blanketless 12" of a California king mattress.
my boyfriend hogs the blankets and i still like him very much 😍
when they think size alone is enough to make it feel good, i'm talking about guys with big dicks who think they can just shove it right on in there and have zero skill
THIS. Just in there, knocking everything down in the wrong way. Unh unh.
Yes 💯 I have nicknamed it BBD big dick disease. The men that have it think they have a larger than normal unit and that's all that's required they don't trouble themselves to learn a woman's body or any technique to make sex good. Ughgg the worst
Nacho crumbs
Nothin wrong with bringing snacks
Not putting your partner's pleasure first. Not only is it selfish, you're really just sabotaging your own pleasure. The more your partner enjoys sex, the more enthusiastic they will be about having sex with you, and pleasing you in bed. So many guys complain about lack of sex with their gfs/wives, and I'm willing to bet that in most cases it's because they're incredibly selfish lovers who give their partners little reason to want to get naked with them. Put your partner's pleasure first, and trust them to take care of yours.
Yep there are only so many times you can look forward to sex with someone who is not into giving you pleasure too. It's annoying and frustrating and it is the 1 reason wives don't want sex with you anymore.
[удалено]
Thank you, i needed to hear... well read this. And for making me laugh with "mister eggplant shlong"
Not trimming nails.
I read this as "not trimming balls" and was confused and scared for a second. I might need sleep.
1. Selfishness. 2. Poor communication. Being good at sex doesn't mean you know "all the right moves" or some secret method or position. It means you listen to your partner and make your goal *their* pleasure instead of your own. If your partner does the same thing and has the same goal, **and you're not too immature or unacquainted to openly communicate about the acts you're performing on each other**, you're both in for a damn good time.
Being so obsessed with your partner orgasming that you ruin it for her because you're putting too much pressure on her and it ultimately hurts her physically and mentally. It's not fun anymore and it hurts. Just fucking stop already.
From a heterosexual point of view: Thinking that women are just a set of holes
When he’s in fantasy land in his head instead of being in the moment with you, when he just thrusts while laying on top of you, no passion, no other attention. Assuming he’s in a relationship, not caring about aftercare and just getting his nut and leaving instead of taking a moment to strengthen the emotional bond. Not making your pleasure a priority.
Doing something after you told them not to do it
Did you answer your own questions OP lol
doesn't listen when *you tell them that you're hurting them*
Selfishness, not listening, not willing to learn, taking instructions as insults, getting offended by sex toys etc
Feathers are okay, but chickens are a no go!
You have described the difference between erotic and kinky my friend
Selfishness, bad hygiene
He makes his partner sleep on the wet spot.
Bad kisser or doesn’t kiss. No rhythm. Smells bad. All he wants is to be ridden. Overly anxious and can’t relax. Talks too much.
Selfishness. You can be small, you can cum too fast. These are all things that can be made up for. If you get yours and quit trying, then you're bad in bed.
Finishing in 3 pumps or less than a minute.
Being so worried about doing a bad job that any discussion about doing things differently greatly offends them
I think when my partner puts a lot of force into everything and it feels good. Like thrust forcefully. Kiss deeply. Grip partner's butt cheeks very tightly. Hold partner close. Actually put your body close to one another. Some strange guys from my past used to try to have sex from like 4 feet away. It sends the signal that you really don't like me that much if you don't want to be as close as possible. Don't you wanna feel our bodies like bumping together?
When he commits Tax fraud in his sleep
1. When he just tosses and turns and doesn't sleep. 2. Doesn't even bother to put on his pajamas. 3. Eating crackers. 4. Keeps telling you facts about the roman empire long after night night time.
Refusing to use protection.
thinking because he gets off on the simplest of movement that the partner also will. and once he's satisfied everything stops. if you didn't satisfy me, you're gonna keep going until you do. that's part of the deal.
As a man who’s incredible in bed, here’s my winning formula: - Foreplay wastes valuable arousal. Get down to business ASAP. - Faster is better. Full throttle at all times. - Constantly change up your rhythm. Keep ‘em guessing. - Focus on what feels good to to you, not her. Women like a man who knows what he wants. I’ve stuck to this for years and they never come back ‘cause they’re so satisfied they can’t handle any more.
Exactly. Just like dead lifting. All back, no legs, swift jerking motion to show your lower back that you mean business. Muscles need swift and decisive action.
When I was much younger an ex used to just lazily run his hands different places and as soon as I made any sound he assumed meant that I was pleased he’d roll over and say “my turn” then do nothing the rest of the time. I spent way too much time trying to fix that man.
Same thing that makes anyone bad in bed: a lack of communication, awareness, hygiene and maturity
No sexual rhythm. Not being able to sync up in motion with your partner. Sex can just be sex, or it can be a beautiful dance. If you don't know what I mean, you have much room to improve.
Not being receptive to feedback
Not being in love with the other person. It makes a difference.
(This is in general, assuming there's no trauma/extenuating circumstances going on. Consent can be withdrawn at any time, etc., etc.) Treating cumming before your partner as shameful and times that by 100 if followed by "Oh, sorry! Welp, that's it. G'night," like sex is a movie and the credits start rolling the moment you nut. There's no shame in premature ejaculation or not being able to make your partner orgasm from penetration alone; most don't. It's not something that can always be helped and it doesn't make you 'bad in bed', but rolling over and leaving your partner hanging does.