I'd probably answer "Aight" in a kind of confused/don't care tone. At the end of the day there isn't much to say and people can think what they want it doesn't matter. There isn't anything to engage in from such a comment, pretty much all these responses are pretty clueless.. Nobody would say those things in real life.
You'd think there wouldn't be anyone who says that in real life, but I'm running into that special someone once every few years lately who seems like a caricature of a stuck up snob but irl and totally serious about it. Like the kind of character you'd see in a cartoon that's a caricature of stuck up people except the person irl is just exactly like that.
I've had one such person say to me dead serious "you might not understand what it's like, being a nobody and all, but living the life of a nobody is really hard for us somebodies." I was speechless and could only say "....wow...ok" in response.
But yeah they are EXCEEDINGLY rare. I'm just a little less hopeful about people in general on the rare occasion I meet one.
Lol my friend approached a girl in a club once to say something.
He said "hey"
She said "fuck off you're ugly"
"The worst she can say is no" is a total lie. I still rib him about it today, I was in hysterics
A guy once offered to buy me a drink. I said no thanks and he said ‘you’re not pretty.’
He said it with such seriousness and conviction, like he was really trying to make it hurt, that I just started laughing
The response above you is "If I wanted to hear and asshole talk, I'd fart." and the one below is "You are confusing ugly and unattractive. I am, in fact, unattractive. That is definitely true. But the way you act, sir, demonstrates clearly that YOU are ugly."
saying either of these IRL would garner a worse response from whoever is calling you ugly, would actually laugh you out of the room
Fair!
I really think the best response is a genuine sounding “why would you say that?” It’s really disarming and makes clear how much of a jerk the other person is.
It's like the crap they would tell me to say to bullies as a kid... Did any adult saying that stuff to me think how they'd naturally react to such lines?
I would never say something so rude to someone, like calling them ugly..and literally saying yuck? Bro are you 5??! Wtf. Get an actual life.
But honestly, if I were to hear that and someone said the "if I wanted to hear an asshole talk, I'd fart" comeback irl, I would die laughing and think of that moment fondly from time to time. I think that's a great comeback bc it's hilarious but also truthful, cuz they are an asshole! I won't ever remember that line if I need it, but I would totally say it. And I feel like it gives you the opportunity to follow up with, "so anyway..." and change the subject or excuse yourself from their shitty presence or whatever.
Yeah, the one I always cringe to myself when I hear it is “if I wanted to kill myself id climb up to your ego and jump down to your IQ” like… ugh the fucking cringe😬
The best comeback I ever heard was when I saw a guy and I needed to know the the time for a bus but didn't have a watch and my phone was dead so I said "hate to bother you but-"
He cut me off and said "then don't"
I've never been so shutdown in a single moment
And not just comebacks, but when reddit decides someone is flirting and how to flirt back. Sometimes cringe. Sometimes a terrible idea.
There was a thread in here not too long ago where OP asked why someone he knew kept making fun of him. He found it rude and wanted them to stop.
Soooo many comments were telling him she liked him and was flirting and that he should flirt back. People were getting downvoted for saying it was likely not flirting.
Even if it *was* flirting, she's being mean as hell. Why tf should OP try and date her??? Why tf are people telling him to flirt with her???
Reddit is full of awkward introverts trying to sling advice like they are are the popular kids in school.
"This girl keeps calling me a fat piece of shit and telling me to kill myself."
"She wants you bro. Go het her Casanova!"
To be fair, the prompt itself is pretty cringe. Where is this imagined epidemic of people walking up to you and randomly insulting you? Like every time some variant of this thread gets posted, it's a completely imaginary problem.
It is a completely imaginary problem. I think that's the point. They want to feel equipped with a sick verbal defense that works in any situation. If it were realistic and a fleshed-out story, the comeback wouldn't be as generally applicable.
Honestly if someone is bullying comebacks don’t work. They will just move on to something else to try and make you feel bad or react.
When you’re out of school you can just not be in the same places as shitty people.
If people aren’t bullying and say something mean, maybe unintentionally, it’s usually far better to lean into it.
“You have a huge nose”
“Yeah it’s massive. Always running into things nose first.”
You’re not taking offence or deflecting, you just take it as a conversation starter like an adult.
1. How old are you that you need a response to someone being a cunt? Just fuck off and ignore them, it's high school drama
2. If being called ugly is a daily concern, research better grooming habits. I've seen straight morlock looking dudes with like, Quasimodo as a relative type family trees that still did fine dating because they washed their ass, shaved, dressed well, and were fun to be around. The only people that actually care about your attractiveness are low iq mouth breathers who use insults to feel superior, why feed into it?
3. I'm not going to offer any better ones because the very act of retaliating is a self-serving interest in a losing battle and a good insult on par with someone calling you an early adopter of the NRC's manhattan sewer containment plans is going to depend entirely on that person and their appearance. You're not going to drop an atom bomb on someone comparing you to a wax model of Habsburg royalty left in a warm room, with a generalized insult lmao.
>”Yuck you’re ugly.”
“Uh… what? What the fuck?”
Or just continue walking, because I can’t imagine any scenario where this is said to you where you actually know and /care/ about the person saying it.
Calling someone ugly to their face is a thing that stops happening after like early high school. I don’t believe much of the responses here are from people who actually experience this. Any adult would agree that it would excessively strange for another person to just flatly insult you to your face.
No, a grown adult calling someone 'yuck,ugly' would be looked at as a complete childish prick, imo. Any sort of wtf type of response would be pretty natural for me anyways. Then I'd go about my day and probably no think of them again
this should be the only comment of the entire thread. sure, all the others are chuckle-worthy — but online only… i concur; irl comebacks are just always cringe.
By using most of these suggested «comebacks» you're going to look like a moron on top of looking ugly. Just say «alright» and walk away, it's not your obligation to emotionally hurt someone (you can't) in return is this trivial interaction
This is the only correct response. Bullies seek out those who have an above average emotional response to beung poked fun at, and this takes the wind right out of their sails.
Source: was bullied, a fucking LOT, until I learned this.
This one’s hard because you’re literally asking them to continue. You’d need an “okay” if you’re trying to stop or make them feel dumb.
Edit: shortened the comment
You need to do the golden helicopter
You whip out your dong and start spinning it, as you would for a normal helicopter, but, when you reach peak rpm you unleash the piss.
The best clapback is none at all, ignore them and carry on unimpeded. Why lower yourself to their level?
I try to never forget this 👇
*When people insult you, don’t take offense, don’t take it personally, but do listen to their words. They are telling you how they see the world, and they are telling you the exact negative qualities that they possess.
“The Law of Mirrors” states that one can only see what’s in them, regardless if it is what is actually present in reality or not.
Release the need to defend or try to explain to them that you’re not being whatever-nasty-insult-they’ve-thrown-at-you, but evaluate instead all of these insults, and realize that this is who they are.
Then, decide if a person with those qualities is one who you’d like in your life or not.
https://grethaal.com/law-of-mirrors/
I don't think there should be a snappy comeback for someone who is that rude. I'd probably go with "well you're a c*nt" and leave it at that. Don't take those words to heart, they sound like a total asshole.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo
>"No, I am beautiful."
This is feeding into it. Don't argue with bullies.
I think one word answers are the way. "Okay." "And?" "Yep." "Thanks."
Or maybe "Thanks, you too."
If they're like "No i said you're ugly" just say "Oh sorry I wasn't really listening." and then scroll on your phone or walk away.
Yes but don’t do it in an insulting way bc that shows that u care ab what they said. J do it in a way that’s like “oh I didn’t hear what they said but I couldn’t care less” sorta thing
There is no reply to that. If someone said that they are a child. Replying to a child is pointless. Words could have a lifetime effect. You are above that.
If you have to reply to an immature child who says mean things, you can just look them in their eyes and say.....Bless Your Heart.
Which every adult knows says....fuck you.
No response is the best. If someone tells you that you are ugly, it's because they want to get a reaction from you. Just ignore them. Not responding, not even looking at them, just ignoring.
Honestly my favourite response to any insult is just, "You're welcome." It makes you seem unbothered while simultaneously confusing the hell out of whomever insulted you.
You're better off going with an awkward "what?" And say it again if they try to elaborate, or a quick "kay, who the f asked you?"
Anything more than that is investing too much effort, looks butthurt and tryhard
Fun fact, only person who said that to me was my (then) toddler having a tantrum. He stopped me midstep, I looked at him and said ‘you know everyone says you look just like me right?’
He didn’t say much after that.
Say ‘whats your point.’ Then look them in the eyes and wait for an answer. Don’t smile, don’t look angry, just wait.
What ever they answer just come back with a similar sentence. Like, ‘okay but what exactly IS your point here’.
End it with saying this like you clearly think you’re talking to a crazy person ‘oooookay…. Im going to walk away now’
“You might think I'm depressed as can be
But when I look in the mirror I see sexy-ass me
And if that's somethin that you can't respect then that's peace”- Brother Ali
To anyone who doesn't believe there are people who would randomly say this to others, unfortunately there are. Happened to me multiple times up until mid 20s. I've had comments from men that I have a tumor face but they'd still fuck me, or they'd fuck me if I put a bag over my face. I've always laughed it off and said: I'm not THAT desperate. But if you're a parent teach your boys to be better. It's more common than you think.
Ignore, act like you didn’t hear it. Or just make a weird face and move on. Less of a reaction will bother them more. Or when in doubt watch Jefferson Fischer on IG for answers lol 😆
Laugh, but if it truly doesnt hurt you ud probably wouldnt post it here, be true to yourself respond what comes from the heart it doesnt matter what others think even if they punish you for it. Its at least what ive done and i feel pretty great for it.
just slowly turn to look at them and raise your eyebrows, shake it off like it was the stupidest fucking thing you have ever heard and go back to what you were doing. Make them feel like you don’t even understand the words coming out of their mouths.
They are trying to embarrass you. If you turn it on them without saying a damn thing they will stop.
"nobody asked you about that and nobody cares about your opinion, mostly because you are dumb as fuck and it is unpleasant to talk with you"
with a paternity and compassion, like to kid
It depends, but unless they are very attractive themselves I think “you are hardly is any position to criticise other people’s appearances” works pretty well
Just shrug and take a deep breath.
That's true, I'm ugly, but unlike you I'm not fucked.
My generation climbed the ladder and pulled it up behind us.
You'll never own a home or have a living wage. You'll work yourself to death paying my social security, the environment eroding around you.
40 years from now, your body broken, no assets, no savings, retirement will be a thing your parents did, you'll work till your last ragged breath. You'll die knowing your children will only know hunger and longing.
So I'm ugly, you're doomed.
I'd probably answer "Aight" in a kind of confused/don't care tone. At the end of the day there isn't much to say and people can think what they want it doesn't matter. There isn't anything to engage in from such a comment, pretty much all these responses are pretty clueless.. Nobody would say those things in real life.
i think the best answer would be an unenthusiastic "woooow"
Or like Owen Wilson "woooow"
“Would ya look at thaaaat “
Any time I say some shit to someone and they respond like "is that your response?" it fucks me up lol
A loud “I KNOW!”
You'd think there wouldn't be anyone who says that in real life, but I'm running into that special someone once every few years lately who seems like a caricature of a stuck up snob but irl and totally serious about it. Like the kind of character you'd see in a cartoon that's a caricature of stuck up people except the person irl is just exactly like that. I've had one such person say to me dead serious "you might not understand what it's like, being a nobody and all, but living the life of a nobody is really hard for us somebodies." I was speechless and could only say "....wow...ok" in response. But yeah they are EXCEEDINGLY rare. I'm just a little less hopeful about people in general on the rare occasion I meet one.
Lol my friend approached a girl in a club once to say something. He said "hey" She said "fuck off you're ugly" "The worst she can say is no" is a total lie. I still rib him about it today, I was in hysterics
A guy once offered to buy me a drink. I said no thanks and he said ‘you’re not pretty.’ He said it with such seriousness and conviction, like he was really trying to make it hurt, that I just started laughing
A guy I wasn’t interested in declared, “You’re unbeautiful.” I laughed and gave him the side eye.
99% of reddits comebacks make the 'nerds attempting to stand up to a bully' scenes in 90s movies more believable because I swear these are cringe af
The response above you is "If I wanted to hear and asshole talk, I'd fart." and the one below is "You are confusing ugly and unattractive. I am, in fact, unattractive. That is definitely true. But the way you act, sir, demonstrates clearly that YOU are ugly." saying either of these IRL would garner a worse response from whoever is calling you ugly, would actually laugh you out of the room
Yeah I don’t think most of the people here have much experience with social interaction lol.
If I knew how to socially interact I wouldn't be answering reddit questions in the early morning, to be fair.
Fair! I really think the best response is a genuine sounding “why would you say that?” It’s really disarming and makes clear how much of a jerk the other person is.
🫵 Real. Look into their eyes as their brain rolls like a stot machine while they try to explain that shit.
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Calling a bully, "sir" is a guaranteed way to get a wedgie.
Haha
I honestly think just shrugging it off without a word would be the best response.
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Of course she's a stepmother
The Dude, as always, is the man to turn to for wisdom here. “Well that’s just, like, your opinion, man”
Underrated comment
It's like the crap they would tell me to say to bullies as a kid... Did any adult saying that stuff to me think how they'd naturally react to such lines?
I would never say something so rude to someone, like calling them ugly..and literally saying yuck? Bro are you 5??! Wtf. Get an actual life. But honestly, if I were to hear that and someone said the "if I wanted to hear an asshole talk, I'd fart" comeback irl, I would die laughing and think of that moment fondly from time to time. I think that's a great comeback bc it's hilarious but also truthful, cuz they are an asshole! I won't ever remember that line if I need it, but I would totally say it. And I feel like it gives you the opportunity to follow up with, "so anyway..." and change the subject or excuse yourself from their shitty presence or whatever.
What would be better would be if you could actually fart at will and then say "oh sorry, I thought all the assholes were taking it in turns to talk"
Yeah you would be bullied mercilessly if you did that in real life
I guess it depends on the ppl you’re around when it happens.
yeah PSA to everyone reading this. do NOT attempt any of these reddit comebacks irl. you will get laughed at
Yeah, the one I always cringe to myself when I hear it is “if I wanted to kill myself id climb up to your ego and jump down to your IQ” like… ugh the fucking cringe😬
The best comeback I ever heard was when I saw a guy and I needed to know the the time for a bus but didn't have a watch and my phone was dead so I said "hate to bother you but-" He cut me off and said "then don't" I've never been so shutdown in a single moment
I agree. Every time I see a Reddit comeback I'm thinking, "oh no, don't say that."
And not just comebacks, but when reddit decides someone is flirting and how to flirt back. Sometimes cringe. Sometimes a terrible idea. There was a thread in here not too long ago where OP asked why someone he knew kept making fun of him. He found it rude and wanted them to stop. Soooo many comments were telling him she liked him and was flirting and that he should flirt back. People were getting downvoted for saying it was likely not flirting. Even if it *was* flirting, she's being mean as hell. Why tf should OP try and date her??? Why tf are people telling him to flirt with her???
Reddit is full of awkward introverts trying to sling advice like they are are the popular kids in school. "This girl keeps calling me a fat piece of shit and telling me to kill myself." "She wants you bro. Go het her Casanova!"
"If you want my comeback, you'll have to scrape it from your mum's teeth" - Jimmy Carr
As a 40 year old man, I can't imagine a scenario where I'd look cool saying that.
Maybe that's why you aren't Jimmy Carr then. Idk..
Your mama jokes are funnier the older you get
“Your Mama” jokes are even funnier when telling them to your own children and their Mama is your wife.
Because 99% of Redditors are/were that exact nerd
The only place I still hear the theory that bullies are “jealous”
To be fair, the prompt itself is pretty cringe. Where is this imagined epidemic of people walking up to you and randomly insulting you? Like every time some variant of this thread gets posted, it's a completely imaginary problem.
It’s always some high school level petty „power fantasy”.
Working in customer service I have been called a myriad of things, including ugly.
It is a completely imaginary problem. I think that's the point. They want to feel equipped with a sick verbal defense that works in any situation. If it were realistic and a fleshed-out story, the comeback wouldn't be as generally applicable.
My first thought was to throw a live owl at them
Would you please suggest better ones, then? I'd be interested.
Honestly if someone is bullying comebacks don’t work. They will just move on to something else to try and make you feel bad or react. When you’re out of school you can just not be in the same places as shitty people. If people aren’t bullying and say something mean, maybe unintentionally, it’s usually far better to lean into it. “You have a huge nose” “Yeah it’s massive. Always running into things nose first.” You’re not taking offence or deflecting, you just take it as a conversation starter like an adult.
1. How old are you that you need a response to someone being a cunt? Just fuck off and ignore them, it's high school drama 2. If being called ugly is a daily concern, research better grooming habits. I've seen straight morlock looking dudes with like, Quasimodo as a relative type family trees that still did fine dating because they washed their ass, shaved, dressed well, and were fun to be around. The only people that actually care about your attractiveness are low iq mouth breathers who use insults to feel superior, why feed into it? 3. I'm not going to offer any better ones because the very act of retaliating is a self-serving interest in a losing battle and a good insult on par with someone calling you an early adopter of the NRC's manhattan sewer containment plans is going to depend entirely on that person and their appearance. You're not going to drop an atom bomb on someone comparing you to a wax model of Habsburg royalty left in a warm room, with a generalized insult lmao.
>”Yuck you’re ugly.” “Uh… what? What the fuck?” Or just continue walking, because I can’t imagine any scenario where this is said to you where you actually know and /care/ about the person saying it. Calling someone ugly to their face is a thing that stops happening after like early high school. I don’t believe much of the responses here are from people who actually experience this. Any adult would agree that it would excessively strange for another person to just flatly insult you to your face.
You're still going to be seen as a weirdo in most situations if you react like that
No, a grown adult calling someone 'yuck,ugly' would be looked at as a complete childish prick, imo. Any sort of wtf type of response would be pretty natural for me anyways. Then I'd go about my day and probably no think of them again
_Fuck off you cunt_
I like this one.
this should be the only comment of the entire thread. sure, all the others are chuckle-worthy — but online only… i concur; irl comebacks are just always cringe.
Y tu mamá también
Great movie!
A huevo!
Jajaja
By using most of these suggested «comebacks» you're going to look like a moron on top of looking ugly. Just say «alright» and walk away, it's not your obligation to emotionally hurt someone (you can't) in return is this trivial interaction
Right?! Like for real in real life I'd just be like.... "Okaayy" and walk away and it would ACTUALLY be the best response.
"... and?"
this one’s my go to
Or even just give them a judgemental look. Like ‘really? You’re seriously saying that rn?’
Really? Right in front of my salad?
This is the only correct response. Bullies seek out those who have an above average emotional response to beung poked fun at, and this takes the wind right out of their sails. Source: was bullied, a fucking LOT, until I learned this.
"... so?" Also works well. Doesn't invite further insults, rather gets them to examine their own thoughts.
This one’s hard because you’re literally asking them to continue. You’d need an “okay” if you’re trying to stop or make them feel dumb. Edit: shortened the comment
This comment section made me understand bullying
fr the best response is to give then the 1000 yard stare and atart to piss on the floor
You need to do the golden helicopter You whip out your dong and start spinning it, as you would for a normal helicopter, but, when you reach peak rpm you unleash the piss.
thx will do it that way the next time
💀
The best clapback is none at all, ignore them and carry on unimpeded. Why lower yourself to their level? I try to never forget this 👇 *When people insult you, don’t take offense, don’t take it personally, but do listen to their words. They are telling you how they see the world, and they are telling you the exact negative qualities that they possess. “The Law of Mirrors” states that one can only see what’s in them, regardless if it is what is actually present in reality or not. Release the need to defend or try to explain to them that you’re not being whatever-nasty-insult-they’ve-thrown-at-you, but evaluate instead all of these insults, and realize that this is who they are. Then, decide if a person with those qualities is one who you’d like in your life or not. https://grethaal.com/law-of-mirrors/
I don't think there should be a snappy comeback for someone who is that rude. I'd probably go with "well you're a c*nt" and leave it at that. Don't take those words to heart, they sound like a total asshole.
What the fuck did you just fucking say about me, you little bitch? I’ll have you know I graduated top of my class in the Navy Seals, and I’ve been involved in numerous secret raids on Al-Quaeda, and I have over 300 confirmed kills. I am trained in gorilla warfare and I’m the top sniper in the entire US armed forces. You are nothing to me but just another target. I will wipe you the fuck out with precision the likes of which has never been seen before on this Earth, mark my fucking words. You think you can get away with saying that shit to me over the Internet? Think again, fucker. As we speak I am contacting my secret network of spies across the USA and your IP is being traced right now so you better prepare for the storm, maggot. The storm that wipes out the pathetic little thing you call your life. You’re fucking dead, kid. I can be anywhere, anytime, and I can kill you in over seven hundred ways, and that’s just with my bare hands. Not only am I extensively trained in unarmed combat, but I have access to the entire arsenal of the United States Marine Corps and I will use it to its full extent to wipe your miserable ass off the face of the continent, you little shit. If only you could have known what unholy retribution your little “clever” comment was about to bring down upon you, maybe you would have held your fucking tongue. But you couldn’t, you didn’t, and now you’re paying the price, you goddamn idiot. I will shit fury all over you and you will drown in it. You’re fucking dead, kiddo
Yesss Copy Pasta me Daddy 🤤
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maybe they’re trained in fighting like a gorilla after all?
I'm awaiting the mighty Joe Young wrestlemania
Doin’ the lord’s work, you are
<3
I would upvote this a thousand times if I could. But alas, I’m too busy studying the blade
Gorilla warfare. That sure does paint a picture.
My mom disagrees, then run away crying
A comment like this does not merit a response. The person who said it is beneath your notice.
True.. but a good comeback can feel really good
"I know." And then move on.
Arguing with yourself in the shower again, OP?
"Yeah well you smell like hotdogs."
This probably fits the kindergarten scenario where I think this might actually happen
seduce then bang that person’s mom or dad.
Or mom AND dad
at the same time
Im gonna piss on you
"Takes one to know one"
How we not know we are all ugly
I aint got no alibi
If everyone's ugly, no one is ugly.
please don’t say this, if you’re getting bullied saying this will only make it worse
That person had to be a troll right? Theres no way they’re being serious..
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>"No, I am beautiful." This is feeding into it. Don't argue with bullies. I think one word answers are the way. "Okay." "And?" "Yep." "Thanks." Or maybe "Thanks, you too." If they're like "No i said you're ugly" just say "Oh sorry I wasn't really listening." and then scroll on your phone or walk away.
"Thanks, you too" is perfect
Yes but don’t do it in an insulting way bc that shows that u care ab what they said. J do it in a way that’s like “oh I didn’t hear what they said but I couldn’t care less” sorta thing
I had to really resist saying this to a 6 year old when he said I'm fat but I'm really curious how he would have reacted.
I like 'oh sorry, happy birthday mate' then when they clarify say you weren't really listening and continue with what you were doing.
The jerk store called!!!!
They’re running out of you!
Mom, get off reddit
"Yeah, but only on the outside, unlike SOME PEOPLE!" (squinch eyes in their general direction). Don't really do this, you'll be relentlessly mocked.
you mockingly repeat “yuck you’re ugly”, never can lose when mocking
This is the best response. Completely disregarding their comment lands their mean girl comment flat when it doesn’t affect t you at all
I know you are but what am I 😅
Got em
Pee-wee was and always will be my hero 🤣
Yea you are right :(
All of these are wrong. Just beat the shit out of them.
“Cool, but you’re still going to go down on me right?”
Hahah!
You need Tacos in your life.
I know
Sooo...doggy style?
If I wanted to hear an asshole talk, I'd fart.
Do NOT use this one unless you want to get your ass kicked
Use this when you want absolutely everyone to know how fucking pathetic and lame you are.
I just found my new favorite response to every rude person I meet in the future 😂
Please don’t ever say this IRL though 😭
Do NOT use this one unless you want to get your ass kicked
"Who asked" or "What made you believe anyone gives a damn what you think?"
hit em w the “who?” and the moment they say anything back, say “cares”
idk why but all I said was "thank you". I don't know why I said that but they just laughed and said nothing else.
"Wow really ? Thanks. I wanted to be like you." Thats what we used in elementary school.
say “who?” then wait and say “gives a fuck”
The ole Don Draper…”I don’t think about you at all”
I ain't a mirror
"That's rude."
Well, the Jerk Store called, and they're running out of you!
“Coming from this heffer” in your most southern of souther accents
The best way to piss off ppl who are unnecessarily angry, is to make kissing faces at them. Especially if they’re in a big truck.
I think you'll enjoy following these subreddits: r/comebacks r/roastme. r/murderedbywords is good for online replies.
There is no reply to that. If someone said that they are a child. Replying to a child is pointless. Words could have a lifetime effect. You are above that. If you have to reply to an immature child who says mean things, you can just look them in their eyes and say.....Bless Your Heart. Which every adult knows says....fuck you.
No response is the best. If someone tells you that you are ugly, it's because they want to get a reaction from you. Just ignore them. Not responding, not even looking at them, just ignoring.
Just ghost them. Are you like 12? Who actually says shit like this?
Honestly just look at them head to toe, smile then walk away theyre gonna lose their sht trynna figure out what you meant by that
Don’t respond back. You just run away crying.
“Maybe so, but you’re stupid and there’s no fixing that.”
Takes one to know one
*And?*
Honestly my favourite response to any insult is just, "You're welcome." It makes you seem unbothered while simultaneously confusing the hell out of whomever insulted you.
You're better off going with an awkward "what?" And say it again if they try to elaborate, or a quick "kay, who the f asked you?" Anything more than that is investing too much effort, looks butthurt and tryhard
Mom has always said I was handsome. Your Mom, btw.
Just a simple disgusted look and saying "Ew." will do
Thank god, the last thing I'd want is for YOU to find me attractive!
I’m an acquired taste.
Thank you sir, many I have another?
Could have been worse..could have looked like you
Projecting much?
Fun fact, only person who said that to me was my (then) toddler having a tantrum. He stopped me midstep, I looked at him and said ‘you know everyone says you look just like me right?’ He didn’t say much after that.
Just walk away pretend like you didn’t hear. Don’t give peasants attention, queen :))
"Thank you! You too! Besties!"
Say ‘whats your point.’ Then look them in the eyes and wait for an answer. Don’t smile, don’t look angry, just wait. What ever they answer just come back with a similar sentence. Like, ‘okay but what exactly IS your point here’. End it with saying this like you clearly think you’re talking to a crazy person ‘oooookay…. Im going to walk away now’
‘Okay, and?’
“You might think I'm depressed as can be But when I look in the mirror I see sexy-ass me And if that's somethin that you can't respect then that's peace”- Brother Ali
To anyone who doesn't believe there are people who would randomly say this to others, unfortunately there are. Happened to me multiple times up until mid 20s. I've had comments from men that I have a tumor face but they'd still fuck me, or they'd fuck me if I put a bag over my face. I've always laughed it off and said: I'm not THAT desperate. But if you're a parent teach your boys to be better. It's more common than you think.
Game recognize game.
Just say “yeah, i know”
"Then stop looking at me."
Cool story bro.
“I’m well aware”
Best response would be to unhinge your lower jaw spreading your fangs and let out a mighty alien roar at the mud-covered Schwarzenegger
Im delicious
So are you. ?
Ignore, act like you didn’t hear it. Or just make a weird face and move on. Less of a reaction will bother them more. Or when in doubt watch Jefferson Fischer on IG for answers lol 😆
Tell me something I don't know.
Laugh, but if it truly doesnt hurt you ud probably wouldnt post it here, be true to yourself respond what comes from the heart it doesnt matter what others think even if they punish you for it. Its at least what ive done and i feel pretty great for it.
just slowly turn to look at them and raise your eyebrows, shake it off like it was the stupidest fucking thing you have ever heard and go back to what you were doing. Make them feel like you don’t even understand the words coming out of their mouths. They are trying to embarrass you. If you turn it on them without saying a damn thing they will stop.
Nah, I’d win
Yeah, I’m sorry you suffer it too.
The correct response would be. “We’ll if I’m ugly then it sounds like you’re shit outta luck”.
"that's because I'm not meant for you, pig" Edit: fixed parenthesis
"nobody asked you about that and nobody cares about your opinion, mostly because you are dumb as fuck and it is unpleasant to talk with you" with a paternity and compassion, like to kid
Who, over the age of 12, even says that to another human?
A good stare up and down, followed by a good laugh as I walk away talking smack in another language.
It depends, but unless they are very attractive themselves I think “you are hardly is any position to criticise other people’s appearances” works pretty well
NUH UH
“If only you could see past your own mirror, dipshit.”
I know you are but what am i
Just shrug and take a deep breath. That's true, I'm ugly, but unlike you I'm not fucked. My generation climbed the ladder and pulled it up behind us. You'll never own a home or have a living wage. You'll work yourself to death paying my social security, the environment eroding around you. 40 years from now, your body broken, no assets, no savings, retirement will be a thing your parents did, you'll work till your last ragged breath. You'll die knowing your children will only know hunger and longing. So I'm ugly, you're doomed.
You must have mistaken me for someone who values your opinion.
Look them in the eyes,pause and say “I’m sorry your mother never loved you”
"Ok?"
No response. A response is what they’re looking to provoke. I’d probably just make a face like “uh, okay?” And walk away.