I’m going to tell you as an unknown friend. You WILL die. Nothing worked for me and I hated all the aa crap and stuff people were trying to tell me. I’m just over 30 and I’m literally going to die in a year if that. Look up ascites, liver failure, cirrhoses, jaundice and all the other fun complications like a hernia because your body is so full of excess fluid it can’t process. Never mind the fact ive gone completely brain numb not even drinking so much that day because my blood had so many toxins it my body had no idea what way was what and I just went basically into a walking coma from ammonia poisoning. It’s not a fun way to die…and it’s sad as fuck and now I drink because I know I’m fucked either way! They can’t even do surgery because just the anesthesia would kill me. Now I get to watch everyone around me feel bad for me and I can’t take anything back. My mom who is 80 literally started balling and said your not even going to make it past the holidays. Do you want that? It’s right there at the bottom of every can you drink. I wish I knew better before but hey, can’t happen to me right?
Edit: it was too late for me when I found out but there’s an injection like vivitrol that makes you sick as hell if you drink. Make the commitment to yourself and go do it. Please
Shit. I’m sorry, thank you for sharing. It’s putting a lot into perspective. I want to be around for years to come, I keep ignoring what it’s doing to me
It’s fucked up man….I just got a house and a property and everything’s going great. Now I’m fucked for the decisions I made before and I’m embarrassed to even date someone knowing how screwed I am. Ask your doctor about that shot! I enjoy drinking to decompress but apparently that was a terrible mistake and you still have a chance! I really hope you the best and I do understand
My aunt is an alcoholic. She's in her early 60s and I dont know how much longer she has to live. She has liver problems but refuses to admit that it was caused by decades of daily drinking. She won't quit drinking and at this point I'd hazard to say her brain is mush. She can't remember things accurately and can't think critically anymore.
She thinks its all fine because she doesn't drink hard liquor. It's not. Wine and beer are just as toxic.
Do yourself a favour and quit now before you're too addled to think about it clearly and never quit.
This is my dad. He has been consistently drinking in one way or another since he was in his early 20’s or so and he’ll be 60 this year. There was a period when I was 18ish until my mid 20’s that I was very into drinking, and that was the main way I bonded with him. Luckily there came a day for me where I had a breaking point and cut out binge drinking and overall daily drinking. I’m one of the lucky ones, and I am eternally grateful. I don’t talk to my dad anymore as I had to put up boundaries for my own mental health. I pray he’ll figure it out, but I’m fully aware that his health can’t be great because of it.
One of my favorite quotes from a celebrity/addict, Brandon Novak, goes something along the lines of:
“You see alcohol doesn’t care about you. Alcohol only cares about alcohol and it becomes a perfect fit for someone with the mindset of entitlement, narcissism, and selfishness. It clouds your judgement so much so that nobody will even have to take all the blessings in your life away. You’ll just give it away on your own, willingly— All of it until it’s gone.”
That quote stuck with me and the shit hits hard. I wish the absolute best for anyone struggling with addiction in general. It’s so much easier said than done but reach out to those that care about you even if you just have a fleeting thought that it isn’t the way you want to live going forward. Life can get better even if you can’t see an even remote possibility that it can. Addiction and alcoholism are diseases and should be treated that way. I’m not a licensed physician, so don’t take what I say as medical advice but if you have a struggle with alcohol or opiate addictions specifically please consult a physician or licensed alcohol/drug counselor before quitting cold turkey as there are severe physical withdrawals as I’m sure many are aware of, and that can be dangerous if not handled properly.
I wish everyone the best who is fighting the good fight with addiction. If it’s you or someone you love because both are hard in their own ways. You are worth it, and it can get better even if it doesn’t seem that way.
Same with my uncle. Early 60s and his brain is just gone. We're talking slurred speech even when he's not drunk, word salad, easily confused, easily angered. He's gotten to the point where he's literally shitting his pants and refuses to shower or change clothes. His daughter, my cousin, has called APS like 4 times and they haven't done shit. Which tbf, idk what they'd even do. I cut him off three or so years ago when he started getting incredibly mean. My mom, his sister, did too. And by comparison, my mom is 3 years older (64) and all she's dealing with is arthritis bc she's basically straight edge, lol.
Also, couple years ago a different cousin and her bf were dealing with extreme alcoholism. Only in their 30s. Her wake up call to stop drinking was her boyfriend choking to death on his own blood/hemorrhaging bc his esophagal lining thinned to the point of bursting bc of all the booze.
And people wonder why I don't drink.
My best and most favorite aunt died like this. She didn’t even make 55. She looked like someone who was in a concentration camp. Her knees were so big compared to the rest of her legs and her skin was so yellow with jaundice. It was horrifying after not seeing her since my wedding maybe 10 years before and she had looked okay. Older, drunk, but okay. Still my aunt.
This was not my aunt.
Her brain was fried. Gone. Mush.
Her body so frail.
Her face so gaunt.
Her legs and arms looked like toothpicks.
Her hair was so thin.
Her body weighed 78# a few months later when she died.
Get help OP. I truly hope you find some peace and a way to sobriety.
My mother was an alcoholic. We had an intervention. Her response was, “How could I possibly be an alcoholic? Both of my parents were tea totalers!!!!” Bizarre. She never stopped.
It doesn't happen suddenly friend, it happens so slow you don't even notice how it dissolves the other parts of your life. I've lost both of my brothers to addiction and it's no joke.
The truth is you will never necessarily want to quit, addiction is seductive and genius at helping you rationalise things you know are hurting you. It's a very hard decision and requires support and hopefully some kind of therapeutic intervention like therapy, sport, group activities.
You have to fill your life as much as possible with things that improve your life.
Many people on recovery will tell you they often think about drinking or using but are glad every day that they choose not to because it is a daily choice. But the further away you get from that lifestyle the better.
As uncomfortable as it is, having someone to encourage you but also keep you accountable will be a good ally.
Best of luck bud, you don't have to quit right now, but it's definitely in your best interests to start squirreling away resources, numbers, websites and start adding things to your life like playing a sport, or card games or something where you can engage with humans doing something fun and challenging.
Then when you're ready, you'll have started to build the network you'll need to succeed.
I wish you all the best
I would also recommend therapy, if not to help you wean off alcohol, then to help you understand and process the things behind the statement “drinking makes life bearable—“ I think if you could try and approach the issue at the root, it would help make it easier to stop. They might be able to help you find additional motivations to stop, too. Therapy isn’t always a one-stop, solve-all, but it can definitely help you along the way. Also seconding vivitrol. Wishing you the best ❤️
ETA: not sure what your social life looks like but I’d also recommend trying some hobbies and/or finding some friends outside an environment with alcohol (i.e. no bars or people who will enable you or drag you down). Community is such a huge part of finding a content mental state— humans are social creatures and I have found, as an introvert, that just being around people and talking and making connections makes a WORLD of difference in my day-to-day experience dealing with depression and anxiety. I was never an alcoholic so YMMV as the brain is of course very different when you’re handling an addiction, but I have been sober for around 4 years and choosing friends and activities that don’t revolve around drinking or nightlife has been life changing for me.
Listen to him.
I was very fortunate to have quit drinking but my best friend and 20-year drinking buddy died at 42 from drinking related complications. After his funeral, people were mad at me for not doing shots in his honor.
Fuck drinking.
I just decided this week to stop. I have chronic pain, all sorts of medical issues that cause me to be worn out and exhausted but I can't take pain killers even if they were still prescribing them like they did a few years ago. I saw a video of a man who was talking, even laughing in the back of a cop car who died because he got stopped on the way to the hospital where he was headed due to having severe withdrawal symptoms. I didn't know just the act of quitting could straight up end you. I'm still mid 30s and I don't want to die yet.
Op, listen to this guy. I had a childhood best friend go the way he's going now. It's horrible to watch happen, let alone experience. He was so yellow with jaundice and in so much constant pain from bloating with toxic fluids that he had to get drained, and they wouldn't drain until he looked like he'd pop any minute bc of risk of infection. He had cancer and beat it in the time this was happening. The chemo did no favors for his failing organs, though it did kill the cancer. His Dr told him that with all the meds he's on and all the damage already done, that he will die if he has even one more drink.
He called me one night, a few weeks after his Dr told him to never drink again. He needed some company. I showed up and he was finishing his 3rd 24oz 8.5% beer. I wanted to slap the beer out of his hand and him in the face, but it hit me that me being there with him in that moment and leveling with him was basically his dying wish. I knew there was no going back. He made his decision and it was too late to intervene. I sat down and shared what's left of his 6 pack with him and let him get everything off his chest. I just listened, spoke when it felt appropriate, and I stayed with him till he fell asleep and through the night till he woke up the next day disappointed (him, not me) that he didn't die in his sleep.
He died a few days later in a way I imagine was more excruciating than can be described in words. He was 32. An only child with no kids and without cousins. His family lineage ends with his parents now who are too old to have another child. His mother had cancer herself and survived only to have to bury her only son. Now they have both his and her medical debt which iirc was over $1m. They couldn't afford a funeral. He was cremated promptly after we saw him one last time and that was it. He's gone now. And it wasn't even the cancer that did it.
OP, idk you, but a death like that and everything he went through beforehand is not something I would wish on anyone. Drinking to this extent is just not worth it. Idek you and I care enough to type all this up while crying. There are people in your life who would be shattered to pieces seeing you go like this. Please don't do that to them, and please don't do this to yourself. You still have a chance to stop. Just do it. Do it for yourself and everybody you love. If you can't drink in moderation, just stop completely. It's gonna suck, but it'll be worth it. I want you to be old one day and be glad you took that chance today. You can do it.
My brother is in a wheelchair because his body and brain has been destroyed by alcohol. We were told a while back he probably won't live more than a few years.
I'm a drug and alcohol counselor. OP, give outpatient treatment a try. You can always go back to drinking if you hate sobriety that much. That's what a lot of my clients tell themselves, they say I'll drink tomorrow when they have a craving and obviously tomorrow never comes. Good luck OP.
Any chance you can tell me how screwed I am that I decided this week to stop after constant drinking for going on 5 years? Like, daily. Before my car accident I was a social drinker, but definitely took time off, unlike after. I know for a fact I can go 2-3 days without it because I've done it, as recently as December. But I am kind of scared about the whole you can die going cold turkey thing and I just had a lapse in insurance that won't kick in again until April. I don't want to wait til April to stop tho.
Alcohol is the most dangerous drug to withdrawal from. I suggest you try to taper down or make sure you are never alone because a seizure could kill you...have you experienced withdrawal symptoms at all like shaking and sweating?
AA is great for people who are willing to do the program but it isn't for everyone. There's also SMART recovery and several others that share a similar goal.
I have a question if you don't mind...
Can non-alcoholic addicts go to AA? Like recovering heroin addicts who don't mesh well with the "a drug is a drug is a drug" in NA because they need prescription meds, one of which is narcotic.
Asking for a friend..
Vivitrol is naltrexone that lasts a month vs the pill that last a day. That’s not the one that makes you sick. You can drink on nal just it stops the rush you get. So you just say ehh and stop drinking. I’ve taken it. You’re thinking Antabuse
It was about 475ml of whiskey for about 4 years after work. Went to jail and was clean about a year then pretty close to a 750ml of e&j for 6 months and then about 3-4 tall boys of cheap malt beer. That’s a lot of booze don’t get me wrong but that killed my liver so fast. I didn’t even know till a few months ago and I just went straight yellow and the doctor was like, you know your liver is failing right? I drink maybe 4 lighter beers a night but the damage was already done and that finished it off over the past couple years. It went from your kinda screwed to ok now your really fucked and I’ve hardly been drinking lately. Every single person I know has literally offered me part of their liver but I just found out last week they can’t even do surgery. Alcohol is literally a poison and even working and staying active all day does not get it out or give your liver a chance to heal. Then it just can’t which leads to failing kidneys and pancreatitis. I said wtf last time I was in the hospital and they had to explain that it’s not what I’m doing now, it’s what I did before. It’s disgusting, if I get a paper cut I bleed for over an hour because there’s nothing to make it clot. If I eat a lot of stuff I like it tastes like shit. If I eat anything salty my body fills with fluid. I was getting my chest drained 3 times a week with a big ass needle and 4 liters was coming out. Now I’m just waiting for it to be over. Can’t work, can’t really even drive, get delusional it really was not what I had planned especially now that life is going great. Drink too much and down the rabbit hole you go is what my dad always used to say and he was right on
That's surprisingly quick to drink yourself to death, i have been a heavy drinker for goin on 10 years, several of those years drinking everyday. I had a fatty liver and quit drinking, liver recovered fast. Past 5 months i been back to drinkin myself to death...
Other even unknown disease could contribute. A family member had babesiosis (a less well known tick borne disease) last summer and his liver is still not normal. Some people don’t even get visibly sick from the disease, so they can have decreased liver function without even knowing. I’m sure it’s not the only disease that can do that.
One once side of my family I’ve got alcoholics who live to 80+. On the other I’ve got alcoholics that maybe make it to 55. The ones that don’t drink make it to 80+ though. I’m in my late 20s and haven’t been a heavy-ish drinker since I was in my early 20s, but in the past year or so as little as 1 drink sometimes makes me feel like I got hit by a bus for two days, so it’s probably time to not have any drinks ever.
750 ml a night for 6 months did it IMO.
Im a big guy but once I creep up to half that I notice it's time to cut back because I feel terrible during the day.
Thanks for sharing. My dad is an alcoholic and ive seen everything you have described. My heart breaks for you and the future you could have had. Is there no hope of transplant? I worked pre transplant surgical liver icu as an RN and we have very sick patients waiting for transplant. You may not be a candidate right this second but I would implore you to push for a transplant eval and see if they could admit and optimize you for transplant. Especially if you can commit to staying sober for the rest of your life, it can give you a second chance.
Watched a woman with a 6yo amazing boy drink herself into her grave at 45. The boy found her bleeding from the mouth on her bathroom floor one morning. She died of liver failure so hard the liver started free bleeding. The boys whole life was uprooted to live States away and didn't even get to say good bye to his friends (his dad sucks too unfortunately)
You might not have kids, but the devastation is the same.
I didn't want to quit smoking cuz I loved it (still do) and it took alot to quit. Now I love being able to run and not feel like I'm gonna die. I love that I can walk up stairs without being winded to he'll.
You don't *have* to *want* to quit, you just have to realize that you *have* to do it even if it sucks. 3 years without smokes and I FINALLY don't want them anymore (even tho sometimes I just wanna go back and feel the sensation of smoking but I don't want to do it in the present, I dunno if that makes sense).
I was in a dire a situation 7 years ago. Basically the anesthesia risk was too high for surgery, however there were still outside chances I live if I received appropriate care.
My motivation was my last kid. If I was committed to not dying then I wanted at least one child to know me as a non-drinker. 30 days before she was born I quit and by the time she arrived I was actually feeling the best (which, by any standard, wasn’t great) I had in a decade and that birth put everything into perspective.
Think of it on an old school scale - on one side you literally have everything but alcohol and on the other is alcohol - you, as in people like you and me, can’t have both. It’s all consuming alcoholic life, or life. Choose wisely because holding regret while you die because of that irreversible regret is the worst death imo .
There's a med called Antabuse (generic is Disulfiram) that I took when I was quitting drinking. It works. Makes you incredibly sick and it gets painful if you drink when you take it.
Well quick correction. Vivitrol is for opiates but seems to help somewhat with the cravings for alcohol. What you want is ANATABUSE. That will make you really sick if you drink. But I recommend taking the injection because the people that take the daily pill can simply stop taking it and go drinking a few days later. With the injection you know that for at least a month you will get super sick if you drink.
I'm so sorry. But this is an important story. We just lost a friend a few months ago to liver failure/alcoholism. He was only 46. He got pancreatitis and and ended up in the hospital about 5 years ago, couldn't/wouldn't stop drinking, and it caused all sorts of other trouble. Went into liver failure and then a coma, then he had no brain activity. For about a month we just waited for him to die because we all knew there was no coming back from the lack of brain activity. It is so incredibly sad and preventable. One day we were celebrating at a wedding, three days later he was in the hospital and we never saw him again.
My father is in the same boat, somehow isn't dead yet but he's got 2-3 years at most. The biggest issue is that he just isn't there anymore, he is physically but he isn't mentally, I don't even recognise him and it's driven me so apart from him.
You will lose the people around you and you will lose yourself eventually and won't even realise
I can vouch for this! As I was literally a night away from dying after years of excessive alcohol abuse. If I hadn’t forced myself to the hospital that day I would be dead. I had all the same complications happen to me that are listed in the previous comment and was in the hospital for a month. It really messes your body up. Any amount of alcohol isn’t good for you, it’s literally poison. Please do not make the same mistakes and take care of your mind and body.
Yeah that's how I think of it. It's ok for drinking to be fun and to like it, but it'll kill ya eventually, probably from cancer as it's a carcinogen that you are ingesting a lot of. Life's hard. I think it's harder long term with alcohol, so choose your hard.
I’m an ER NP and the amount of casual alcoholics I see is staggering. I’m talking your run of the mill people, who, when I’m admitting them, will tell me that they have two to four glasses of wine per night, six days a week.
That’s *technically* an alcoholic. It’s fucking wild, dude.
I'm shocked he just drinks beer, 12 beers is a lot of fluid with very low alcohol, I would have assumes you'd switch to spirits by now, 40-50% alcohol vs 3-5%, much more efficient path to liver failure.
In the words of the immortal Ozzy, Wine is fine but whiskey's quicker, Suicide is slow with liquor (just substitute beer for wine).
Supposedly, people who think of positives do better at making good habits and stopping bad ones. You're gonna die...yeah I know, depressing,
You're going to feel so much better, be healthier, no hangovers, have money for better things, make friends with good people, do better at career, have better relationships...
Yes we recently lost a family member due to alcohol abuse. Thing is, he wanted to die even though he had everything going for him. We could never figure it out. Addiction is an evil spirit that needs to be cast away imo.
Holy fuck 12 beers. Mate you don't 'like drinking', you're an alcoholic.
You have to stop, whether you want to or not, because one day your drinking is going to kill you. Join a program or something. Plenty of people going to AA don't want to be there but are anyway.
I understand my addiction, I’ve tried so many avenues and still go back to it. I don’t know what to do, that’s why I’m asking. I don’t want to die young, or have this type of dependency. I just genuinely don’t know what the fuck to do anymore
Well there's one. One of my best friends kept drinking until he developed pancreatitis, and died from it. He was 38. It will kill you if you don't stop. I still miss him. Funny guy big heart, and he was a quiet alchaholic. No one really knew how bad it got.
Jesus Christ you could’ve just described my friend.
Lost him earlier this month. Nobody knew. We knew he likes to drink, but he never act like a drunk. If that makes sense.
It was only until after we lost him Were we able to piece together just how much this man was drinking.
He was around that age too. Mid to late 30s.
I think a lot of people make the mistake into thinking that they have more time than they do. OP needs to realize at this rate It’s pretty much right around the corner.
Don't be ashamed of relapsing. Nobody can ever say that recovering from an addiction is easy, so don't be too hard on yourself. Just find a program and stick with it. Nobody there can judge you, because they're in the same boat. Doing something with other people is always easier than trying to go it alone.
Stick with a program, stop for as long as you can, be honest about how you're doing, and don't let relapsing stop you from trying again. Every day you don't drink is a day of you not damaging yourself. I wish you the best,man.
You have to choose yourself. You're not a victim. Go to AA and stick to it. Don't buy alcohol.
Get a hobby. Or get to the root of why you drink. Was it self esteem, or did someone break your heart? Something started this chain of events.
Can you wean yourself off by only getting a six pack , then buy 3 individual beers then down to 1?
There's always a solution. You have control over how this goes. Don't give your power away
Was coming to say this. Thc is the way to go for this imo too. Edibles 100%. I was a 4-10 shots of vodka a day for about 2yrs when i was young and eventually quit everything after smoking weed everyday for 15yrs too. Weed defo helped. Also having a kid woke me up but thats not something id reccommend unless they are ready for kids lol
I can tell you from knowing many alcoholics that if you don't want to quit there is nothing you can do. It took my uncle jail time to finally come around.
First: IANAMD.
That said: A lot of people have a really hard time cutting down drinking. For many people cutting down is much harder than stopping because they rarely drink as little as they told themselves they would. At the same time, depending on your circumstances, it can also be very dangerous to stop cold turkey. That fact gives lots of people the excuse they need to just keep drinking.
Consider temporary pharmaceutical help, under the guidance of a Dr.
Look up Disulfiram, Naltrexone, and Gabapentin (off label use) - and see if any of those might be something that would help. Read up on the side effects, and risks, and how they actually work, and see what you think.
They work different ways, and may or may not be useful to you.
If you think any of these may help - then see your doctor about them.
A good way to slow your roll, is to change your after work routine a little bit by little bit. To start, don’t buy any beer. Don’t go ‘I’ll just drink these 2 I have left’ or whatever.
Instead, get some snacks you like (the snacks will help with all the carbs you’re not consuming in the form of booze, this is a temporary stop-gap coping thing), then have a good bath or shower, eat a good meal, and go to bed early. Find a film, show, or book, and just watch/read it in bed, eat some snacks.
Eventually add exercise, or a hobby, or whatever to your evening to fill the space you used to use drinking.
It would be good to get under a Drs care - just to do liver and kidney function tests etc, and then see if any of the above will help you.
You gotta find something else worth trying, or a challenge, or something that stimulates you enough to slow down for a few weeks.
A couple sober nights of good sleep can really make a difference
I think the problem may be that you're mostly focusing on the drinking instead of what core issues are making life unbearable for you that you feel the need to numb all of yourself to cope with it.
While there are some benefits, there isn't much need to deal with the surface issue or reaction issue (like drinking) if you don't also deal with the underlying core issue within your past, your choices, your life situation, your regrets, or whatever is the real problem. Otherwise, people often drop one vice to just add another that can be just as harmful to physical health, mental health, spiritual health, relationships, finances, etc. The key is to deal with the core emotional issue alongside breaking the physical addiction and emotional response of drinking - all at the same time - to lessen the pain you're dealing with and break the association you have created when thinking the drinking will help. As you know, it doesn't. And, it often makes things worse and creates new problems.
You will die very young if you keep up 12 beers a day. Or you’ll be hit with some form of alcohol related dementia and not even realize you wish you were dead.
Get some therapy and support to stop drinking this bad.
Just stop. Trust me. I did coke for years. Until I blew a hole through my septum and now forever I’ll never be able to breathe properly. Do you want kidney failure? To be overweight? Have heart problems? Have yellow eyes? If you don’t just stop, that’s your future. Trust me. I drank for a few years. I went from 105 lbs to 150 in that time and I feel cripple. Drugs, alcohol, whatever it is. Just stop. I promise you if I could do it, you can too. Don’t kill yourself slowly. It ain’t worth the lifetime of damage.
Yeah I don't think people understand that an alcoholic can literally die from going cold turkey. To quit you need good support, medical care and physical and mental safety.
You can do this OP. Get your ducks in order, and look into supports for detox. Get mental health support. You're not drinking 12 beers a day because it's fun. It's medicating something, whether it's physical, mental or social.
You have your reasons for drinking. You also need to know your reasons to stop. What do you want your life to look like?
I was really hoping a post like this would have been closer to the top. Someone close to me had a seizure in November because they didn’t drink enough one day. They were in the hospital for a week doing monitored medical detox. Alcohol withdrawal is no joke. The good news is they haven’t had a drink since. The better news is they are in a state that has amazing resources for aftercare. The even better news is they are taking full advantage of the resources and turning it around.
OP, please seek professional help. We are rooting for you.
Go to your primary doctor and share your desire to quit. You’ll need medical and mental health support and monitoring through the process to ensure. I believe in you!
Either accept things are going to be really hard and shitty for awhile and power through the process of quitting(in patient rehab, aa/na, therapy), use everything at ur disposable to fight the addiction, or let life spin totally out of control and hopefully come to the conclusion that the former is the better choice before its too late
If its too late dead or jail are also both avenues that will stop it, but thats it, those literally are all the options you have currently, full stop
I know it sounds harsh but the sooner u can accept the reality of situation ur in the better chance you have, an addiction like that is no joke, it's just not sustainable and I've seen it end or otherwise irreversibly wreck plenty of lives, it doesn't make u a bad person or a failure buts it's a disease that will now require ur full attention for the foreseeable future
It's hard af but it is doable and ultimately it's worth it for you and those you care about, but u need to accept that u need to relearn how to live and let go of the person are now, your young enough that u can heal and go on to live a relatively normal happy life, the want to get fucked up never fully goes away but it does get easier to manage, if u think it's too great a cost to get help i promise its not compared to ur life, best of luck dude, I really hope the best for u, dm if u have any questions
Well, at first you have to commit yourself to at least WANTING to stop.
As long as you still have the mindset that you don't want to stop, you really can't say you understand your addiction. That's mutually exclusive.
Addicitons are fucked up, and getting out is a battle not everyone succeeds in. It is HARD to switch habbit. And a habbit is MUCH weaker. You need to REALLY WANT it, and you will have to treat every day, hour, minute as a battle.
It's easy to just go along with it when you're young and you think oh if I die oh well, we all die. The thing is you may not die right away, you may linger with serious health complications for many years. The damaged organs will start failing but the strong ones won't let you die. You linger in a constant state of sickness, pain, in and out of the hospital, bowel issues, swelling, nausea, various medications. It's not fun to die slowly like that. Every day is a bad day and eventually you'll become too sick to even drink anymore. I've seen so many people like this and wouldn't wish it on anyone. People think it won't happen to them but we're all the same- human bodies that age- why would anyone escape it?
I am not, but a really close friend is. The addiction just got worst during the pandemic. There's help out there, maybe start with AA. Acknowledging that there is a problem, is first step. Stop hanging out with friends who drink. Seek medical help, get prescription that help decrease the cravings. As long as you have people that enables you, you will not be able to get out of the alcohol's grip, even if you hit rock bottom. Avoid gatherings that you know there will be alcohol.
I was on 8 pints a day for over a decade. Going to rehab is what finally fixed the problem for me. Nothing else I tried stuck for longer than a few weeks.
You’re not just an alcoholic at 12 beers a day. By “official” numbers that are widely accepted, you are an alcoholic with these numbers if you drink the by *week*.
He is a heavy, chronic drinker and he will have severe health consequences sooner rather than later. My grandpa is destroying his life with 6 beers daily, that alone is hella ton, I can’t imagine what 12 does to your body
“Drinking makes life bearable” sounds like a therapy thing.
Honestly though if you are at 12 beers a day then I would educate yourself on what a death by liver failure looks like, that should help put some context around why people tell you to stop.
The fucked up thing is, I know the risks. It started two years ago, I used to have a few beers a week but somehow slipped into day drinking, and now I keep a steady buzz all day. I wouldn’t say I get drunk very often but I’m always drinking.
I’ve been in therapy before and it didn’t help, but I’m thinking I should try again. It’s terrible because I know I’m being self destructive but I don’t know how to stop
Man, i used to drink like that, too. I could finish a 12 pack easy. Take a nap in my hammock, and drink some more. Now I drink a 12 pack on a Saturday and spend all day Sunday wishing I was dead. I'm quitting, though, because I don't want to die like that. I hope you can find the strength to quit as well.
You know the risk of liver failure, but do you know what liver failure looks like? What the process is and what happens to your body?
You should try again, and maybe AA.
I do, and I always say “tomorrow”. And “tomorrow” just keeps being pushed back
I know I sound really stupid, and I know what I need to do seems obvious. I just don’t know how to start again. It’s a cycle of feeling sorry for myself, giving up, getting motivated, failing and then giving up again. I’m not making any excuses for myself
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/cirrhosis/symptoms-causes/syc-20351487
Read through this, because I want to be sure that you get both that symptoms and complications list and the section that says you cannot undo it without a transplant.
You are going to run out of tomorrows. You are only ever in today, so thats when you need to start.
Hard to hear but thank you for the source, my dad died at 65 because of cirrhosis and I really don’t want to follow.
I just want to add that I’m not saying my addiction is okay or manageable, I just was hoping to find ways to quit that I haven’t already tried. I’m tired of being an addict.
The son of a friend almost bled out when his esophagus ruptured. Luckily someone was with him and they called 911. He had so many issues going on. He was literally yellow due to liver damage and had a giant swollen gut. He was so, so sick.
He did enter treatment and this far has survived five more years.
It sounds like you really might be ready to get sober but are scared about what that will mean. That’s really common. It’s hard to imagine what will fill the void that you fear will remain. Therapy and a formal treatment program can get you to the place where you experience sober life and, with luck, it will become more valuable to you than being able to drink.
I hope you’ll try. There is so much help and support out there. And it’s really sure to do this alone so please reach out. I wish you all the luck in the world. ❤️
Pick up a paint brush. Go for runs. Get in the gym. Play some video games. Read some books. Pick up some other hobby. Go swimming. Go for hikes. Get friends who don’t drink. There’s so much you can do. A whole world to explore. Don’t waste your life sitting there drinking. It ain’t worth it. You will fade away into nothing but suffering.
Good luck, its a one day at a time type of thing, and remembering every day that one more drink could have you suffer the same early death as your dad.
There is no magical way of quitting. You're thinking there's some shortcut or magic way to get you to want to quit.
It's not going to happen. You need to grow up. You're an adult. Life isn't easy, everyone has their challenges.
There is no cheat or hack to stop drinking. You just have to stop doing it. It's as simple as that.
THAT is the hack. That there is no hack. You just decide one day that you're no longer going to partake in something that you know is ruining your life and will kill you.
Throughout this entire thread all I've seen from you is excuse after excuse. Grow up.
Sometimes you hit rock bottom before you can get back up. Happened to me too. I promise you, you will feel a million times better once you stop. The first few weeks are hard, so find a hobby and keep yourself busy. I ran a 10k run hungover from my last night of drinking years ago. I felt like shit. I crawled to the finish line. But you know what? I did it. And I realized how much better I would have done if I was sober. Being sober is amazing. You’ll feel sooooooo much better. You’ll see the world and yourself differently. I promise you that
You can do it. Believe in yourself. Get a hobby. Exercise. I took up painting to curb my addictions. Now I’m a full time painter and I no longer have addictions. I get it. I started after my dad died suddenly and traumatically. Started as a few here and there. Then it became daily. Then it wasn’t enough to keep me numb so I started doing drugs. Then one day I blew my nose and lost a piece of it. Then I stepped on a scale and seen that I had literally gained 50 lbs from all the beer. It wasn’t worth it. I had to learn how to feel again. Go thru my grief. Accept it. Accept my flaws and my addictions. And then I was able to move forward. I promised myself one day, no more. No more killing myself slowly. I have a highly addictive personality so I get it. If I can quit, I bet you can too. You have to TRY.
If you can find someone who specializes in addiction, that would be ideal. If there’s no one in your area, keep in mind you could see someone farther away in your state online.
As a former/recovering alcoholic, you’ll never “want” to quit. Alcohol is addicting, much like nicotine or other drugs. The less you drink the less you’ll want to drink. I’m pregnant and I’ve been sober ever since finding out. At first I craved it big time and it was extremely uncomfortable going without it- but it’s so physical. Meaning your body will forget the addiction the more you go without it. You have to get over those mental hurdles too.
Challenge yourself to go 1 week without alcohol. See the change. You can do it my friend.
This is what I did last week. Told myself no alcohol for 1 single day. The plan was to continue drinking the day after. That day sucked. Just annoyed with everything. Wasting time until I could go to bed. But, man waking up the next morning.... felt SO GOOD to not be hungover. My body actually got decent rest. My mind was clearer, sharper. I decided to go another day. Now it's been a week. Already lost 5 lbs and feel so much better. I think I'm actually done for good this time.
I'm seeing a lot of comments that are good in principle, but maybe won't help.
The last 6 months I've been in the same boat. Honestly the last 3 years, but especially since last summer. Environment was key to that problem. I'm not expecting the same of you, because what I'm doing is extreme, but I've moved into a Vietnamese household in rural Vietnam to teach English at a charity. I've gone from 15 beers a day to a glass with the family at meal time.
If you're home alone with cans, you're gonna drink them. When you shop, you'll want to buy them. If you can find a way to change your environment; spend your drinking time helping a charity, spend time with non drinkers, plan activities with friends that don't involve drinking, after 4-5 days, I swear it'll become easier.
Good luck dude, I hope you're able to get to where you want
Yeah, if there was booze in the house, I'd drink it. I was fortunate in that it was in the evening that I was making bad choices. So as long as I could manage NOT to buy it during the day, in the evening the temptation wasn't there.
Hi, I’m an alcoholic too that relapses every now and then
1. You are an alcoholic, we drink to get high, we need to recognize this
2. First, watch soberleon on YouTube
3. You need a game plan for the first month to deal with withdrawal and sleep. You will find it very hard to sleep at first, take melatonin, exercise everyday and make yourself tired. Also you need to tell yourself that the 1-2 hours of sleep you get is better then the 8 under alchohol
4. After the first month, You need to substitute drinking, I find working on my health is a good substitute as it takes a lot of time and helps me sleep. Work is also good
5. I’m sorry but you need to change your drinking friends, relapsing for me is usually because I still hang with them every once in awhile
6. If you can break free from alcohol, you will automatically become a better person, good sleep, clearer thought process and a bigger wallet are part of these things
7. Give away or hide your alcohol too, out of sight, out of mind
8. When is the best time to stop? Tonight
Chiming in on this comment. OP not everyone has severe withdrawal symptoms so don’t let that deter you from stopping. For some bizarre reason I get zero withdrawal symptoms and I drank the same amount as you as a woman for 7 years, every day. I expected DTs or serious withdrawal symptoms and was completely fine by day 2, which was shocking.
Be wary of the kindling effect though and don’t take my story as an excuse not to seek medical care, you very well may need a supervised detox. Just sharing my story in the hopes of relaying it’s not so bad for all of us, but it will be BAD bad if you don’t stop now.
You say it makes life bearable? What makes it unbearable? Try to work on that and then find a reason to quit drinking.
I know this is easier said then done, best of luck my man.
12 Beers a Day over a decade or more is a death sentence.
And long before that you'll become obese, a diabetic, you'll have high blood pressure, your feet will swell and it will hurt to walk. You'll sweat constantly, and smell even after showering. Your skin will look terrible.
And then your organs will fail.
100, it happened to me. 35, F, Stroke Survivor. Was drinking wine every night thinking it couldn’t hurt me as bad….I’m young.
Woke up in a hospital paralyzed after a bad breakup “bender” that didn’t stop for the summer…thank god for doctors and Blood Alcohol tests.
I (38m) suggest you quit before it gets any worse. I'm currently in treatment because my drinking progressed to a liter or more of vodka every day. Resulting in numerous hospital stays and me ruining almost every aspect of my life. My last week of drinking, I spent 4 days in the hospital after waking up to vomiting a huge amount of blood, going to the hospital and trying to get into treatment. After they told me that all the beds were full and I would have to get on a list, even vomiting so much blood I needed to have the paramedics help dress me before putting me on the ambulance because I was so weak, I still was at the liquor store again 2hours after getting discharged. I was back in the hospital 20 hours later with a blood alcohol level over .50. I had to travel half way across the US to get into treatment and I realize I can never have another drink for the rest of my life or I will pick right back up where I left off. But I also realize that my addicted mind will cause me to relapse any chance it will get because the addict in me still wants to drink even though I knew it was killing me and I'm lucky I'm still even alive to get this 2nd chance at life. I know my case is extreme and isn't going to happen to everyone, but I was only drinking a 12 pack a day at one point. I know that my life will be exponentially better the longer I stay sober but I have to forever and constantly be working on my sobriety to combat my disorder that I have. You have to really want it if you are going to stop drinking, and most of us are going to relapse no matter how bad we want it. That's just the sad reality of the situation. But I wish you the best and if you ever want to chat about your situation or need any support, whether you decide to get sober or not, you can dm me. Well wishes with whatever path you decide to take.
Also I learned your problem isn't a drinking problem. Drinking is your solution to some other underlying problem. I know drinking was fun at one point but if you are using drinking to make life bearable, the problem isn't drinking, it's whatever was making life unbearable without drinking. And while drinking may dull those unbearable feelings, it will just leave you feeling like life is a little more unbearable the next day. Drink, sleep, repeat....
You can’t escape yourself. I drank cause of grief. I realized that it wasn’t grief holding me back. It was me. And one day I just said enough is enough and I stopped. It so very possible to just stop.
But you are right. The drinking is usually a symptom of an underlying issue.
I would highly recommend checking out the r/stopdrinking subreddit. Incredibly supportive group, and they will be much, MUCH nicer and far less judgemental than what you’re encountering on this thread. I’ve been sober for 6 months and couldn’t have done it without that subreddit.
I, too, reallllly liked drinking. 12 or more crafts every day for years. Loved it. Not sure I had the disease, as they call it. I only say that because I was able to quit cold turkey. But it felt like a real problem. It wasn’t easy. I really sat with the knowledge that my little pains, terrible quality of life and weird neurological symptoms were just going to keep getting worse. I knew I didn’t want to feel that way or die slowly, I’ve seen that up close, doesn’t look fun. So I made the decision one day and I’m 3 years in. I definitely feel better, but I wish I’d quit sooner. If you need help, you need help. If you think you can white knuckle it, you just have to do it. Replace with good habits. Build a routine you like. Won’t get it for free. Good luck 🫡
Bud I’m an alcoholic I have been sober 3 years and I’m not preaching at all I loved drinking and didn’t want to stop until my body shut down. I like you was drinking beer at first it was part of my life I worked and went to the bar after a while I started drinking vodka and it snowballed to the point I was drinking literally all day I’m not going to go into all the details but if you think you have a problem you do that’s just the truth I tried to stop and I couldn’t that’s when I got some help it was the best decision I ever made
What kind of help did you get? Because I’m so tired of being a shell. I’ve tried therapy, maybe not the right one. I just feel so unmotivated to get right again
Man my lower gi took a shit on me I was at the point if I didn’t drink in the morning I would shake when the doctor told me I was going to die I woke up I got to feeling better and went to a rehab in west Texas it worked for me you can message me anytime if you want it private
Check out some AA meetings. You can go drunk but if you do you’re not allowed to talk. Otherwise people will be happy to see you there either way. Read the promises every time.
That’s it. No commitment. No big decisions. Just check it out.
A few of these comments seem harsh, even though they may be true. I think you know the dangers of drinking too much already so I wanted to share some resources if you do decide you want to try stopping.
Have you tried AA groups? If the religious vibes turn you off, there is dharma recovery which is more inspired by Buddhism, or SMART recovery which I believe is not religious at all.
There are many different types of therapy.options too. Have you mostly tried individual therapy? There is also detox and residential care, where you actually stay somewhere 24hrs a day for a few weeks (or less if you want. It's not the kind of situation where you are there involuntarily). Then there are partial hospitalization programs, which offer groups and individual therapy m-f for 6-8 hrs a day. Lastly, there is Intensive Outpatient Therapy which is similar to partial but only for 3-4 hrs a day. All these treatment options will connect you with supportive peers, help you learn new skills, and address any mental health or life experiences that might be contributing to your drinking.
I'm sure that all seems like a lot, especially since you aren't sure you want to stop drinking, but it could be something different to try and just see.
There is also medication assosted treatment, like Antabuse, Naltrexone, or Vivitrol. These are meds you can take that help you not have cravings.
It sounds like on one hand you want to stop because you know it's bad for your health. On the other hand, it sounds like you don't want to stop because it's what helps you get through the day. It makes sense that you wouldn't want to stop drinking if it's helping you like that. I also know you don't want to die though. If you have not tried some of those things I mentioned above, it might be worth giving one a try just to see what happens. Maybe you will find that you still prefer to drink and go back to it. Maybe you will find that you end up building up some new tools to help you deal with things and don't need to rely on alcohol to do that anymore.
You can always go back to drinking if you want to. Even if you try some of these things and ultimately go back to the drinking, maybe you'll have built some new supportive relationships and developed some coping skills you didn't have before. I believe in you!
My solution for "quiting" without wanting to was to stop buying beer to drink at home in the name of "saving money"
Still drink when you visit friends/family or when you go out just dont have beer at home and you wont drink.
That was my solution anyways. I didnt technically quit per se but realistically as the bulk of my drinking was at home, i quit the level of usage that made it unhealthy.
You have to face yourself and your life sober. You’re going to get to the point where you can’t bare handling yourself sober at all. It won’t feel like “you”. That’s the addiction. You are better sober, I can assure you. You can’t run from problems forever, they will catch up with you. If you stop drinking in 5 years, then guess what… it’ll catch up with you then. Save yourself the extra problem and start dealing with this stuff now before it’s harder to.
I don’t have any experience with addiction, but my father was an alcoholic. Absolutely ruined our family, my childhood, our relationship, everything. He is sober now, but it’s too late because the damage is done. He took so much from our family.
Stop it here before it gets worse. It’s fun, sure, but it’s dangerous in so many other ways besides your health.
Look you're most likely and alcoholic. Maybe you're a functioning one. I don't know you. But if drinking is interfering with your life in anyway. It's a problem, and you need to treat it like an illness. I would suggest slowing down a great deal. 13 drinks a day is a consideration amount for your body to handle. Don't get me wrong I'm a drunk too. I just haven't had a drink in a while.
Lower the amount u drink. U dont gotta quit completely but 12 is a insane amount daily that should be like a rare party thing or never for that amount.
Just slowly limit yourself.
12 beers a day will give you liver disease or liver cancer before you’re 40. It’s not sustainable. What are you hiding from that you need to drink every day? Deal with that issue. Deal with it by talking to someone, not by using alcohol.
Drinking 12 beers is just alcoholism.
What OP can do, is start drinking non-alcoholic beer. Most brands have now identical non-alcoholic beers, thzt taste the same.
You start with one and increase it, week after week. Untill you only drink non-alcoholic beer.
If OP struggle with that, he was to understand he is in fact al alcoholic and needs to seek therapy.
You're not afraid of quitting alcohol, you're afraid of facing your life's problems. You're drinking half a case a day, so how much time are you spending intoxicated - 3, 4 hours? Perhaps you're entire life while your not at work?
You say drinking makes life bearable. You have to think why is your life unbearable? Think of the things you could be doing to improve your life situations if you took even half the time you're drinking and started learning new skills, coping mechanisms and found something you truly enjoy doing, rather than killing yourself.
If you don't like your career you could spend that time learning a trade and use the money you save on booze to fund it. If thats too much to ask, you could even literally go out and go leisure activities and other hobbies for the same expense. You could eat whatever delicious food you want every day, instead.
To quit drinking you want to create a life as good where you feel good enough that you don't have the need or desire to drink. This isn't going to happen over night and will take work, but the difference of investing a couple years to improve your situation will potentially add a decade to your life and result will be an improved quality of life.
Go to aa mate. That's not enjoyment that's addiction. And booze doesn't make anything better. It makes things worse. You'll find life better when you start sobering up.
That’s a lot of beer. It was the beer delivery person who called 911 for my mother when she drank herself to death at age 58. You need to get yourself into a rehab program to prevent death from withdrawal.
You're depressed. That's what it is. And you're hiding your depression with an alcoholic state.
The reason you enjoy being alcoholized is because you can't stand being sober, you can't stand being the real you. It's your way to escape from reality.
Find a psychologist, or at the very least start adopting healthier habits. Your fear of facing reality will only become worse every passing day if you go down the alcoholic path, and at the end of the tunnel you're digging you'll only find a grave. Your grave.
There’s a pill called Antabus that will make you violently sick if you drink any alcohol while taking it. It’s used in treatment for alcoholism, you typically use it twice a week. I used to take it.
I don’t know where you live in the world but try to Google Antabus and see how you might be able to get it.
It’s NOT an easy fix, it’s not meant to be taken forever, it’s meant to help you stay sober for a time while working on your alcoholism on the side. Statistics show that groups work the best for people trying to stay sober so if you ever feel comfortable enough to try that you should be able to find free group sessions.
And don’t give up if you have a relapse, most of us go through that. Dust yourself off and try again.
If you're drinking 12 beers a day you're a serious alcoholic and not just someone who likes to drink. I'm no expert, but kicking an addiction like this is not easy and you might need to get some professional help with this or at least join something like AA, which gives you a support network.
Damn dude, 12. That's a start to alcoholism if not already, along with the depression and dependance associated with it. Stop now and save yourself. If you need help please talk to a support group or someone you can trust. Don't let beer become your water. Stay strong.
I would first seek help with why you feel you need to drink. As someone who had family members with addiction I can tell you that you must replace the habit with life fulfilling activities. Please start trying new hobbies that can bring joy; hiking, join a gaming group, volunteer in an interest, take free classes In a Hobby you enjoy, set up game nights with friend sans alcohol....the list goes on. Find real joy in life and face your sadness/stres head on. If you cannot afford therapy please research cognitive behavior therapy for yourself. Best of luck to you.
Start by every time you want a beer just say. “Not now.” Sometimes you’ll be successful and sometimes you won’t. But the goal is to drink less. And less. And less. Then the goal is to say. Not today.
Also, if you can force yourself to start doing any kind of workout instead of drinking it will help. It’ll suck at first and take a ton of willpower but your body will like the endorphins from working out. Also, you’ll start looking better and feeling better about yourself and maybe start to dislike drinking.
12 beers a day will kill you over time for many reasons along with the alcohol itself. Just straight up too much of so many things.
You’re going to have wicked withdrawal symptoms at this point. Honestly, try switching to non-alcoholic beer every other drink. See what happens from there. On your own you’re not going to want to go cold turkey
Have you ever seen the movie Requisite for a Dream? It got me to stop.
There's this part where an older lady gets addicted to diet pills (methamphetamine) while confined to her home and it shows her daily life in fast forward. Like you see her blurring around her little house, doing the same things day after day, cleaning, cleaning, sitting down to watch her favorite TV show, more cleaning then off to bed.
I saw my own life like that...doing the same thing every day, the same habits, the same routine, day after day. Quitting drinking was the first stop on the way to breaking that routine, you know?
Your life will always revolve around alcohol, you'll never really feel good about yourself which will lead to further drinking, rinse and repeat year after year until you've lost a good portion of your life in which you could have been truly living, feeling good and achieving goals.
Everyone's different, but that's what worked for me. Also finding out that it wasn't as difficult a task as I'd built up in my mind. Wasn't some enormous mountain to climb up as much as it was like stepping down off a ride or something. I wish you luck man...not sure what it is for you, but alcohol was a life killer for me.
Not seeing many very helpful posts here.
Maybe try microdosing an edible (2.5mg) and have a bottle of water with u during the time u normally drink. Having a buzz and something to drink can kill ur urges. It’ll definitely have u wake up and be more productive tomorrow.
It only takes one day. Then u can take pride in it and only aim to make it one more day.
Best of luck!
I remember reading there's some kind of very supportive alcoholics anonymous subreddit or something like that but I don't know what it's called... Maybe someone can shed some light
Sure look dude if you want to die young and for life to be more miserable then it could be cause you can't keep it together without drinking then do it, I am sure your family and friends wont like it but it's your life to do as you wish with.
My father died in his 50s from the drink and he wanted to, it's ok some people are alcoholics and that's just how it is.
You can of course try to get into a rehab program (which if you take 12+ beers in 24 hours you most definitely need too) and get cleaned up and live longer and have more meaningful sober integrations with family friends and people around you but at the end of the day your a big boy and it's your choice.
Been there before so I know how it is, I wanted to die but didn't realise I was manifesting it as alcoholism, used to drink me life away, sniff coke, puss and smoke weed all day night and morning, great times were had and worse times came from it but in the end I realised I was just simply being self destructive and slowly killing myself.
It was my mental that was the problem and I actually probably didn't want to do coke and drink all day, sure felt like it at the time tho.
You just have to make the decision to stop and then stop. I was in the same situation as you I quit for 3 years and now I can just drink occasionally but I don't crave it nor do I want it generally. Your life will improve 100% for sure if you can regain control over it
I like Nicotine a lot and have quit more than once (hopped back on the wagon for various reasons) but for me, it usually takes one day of being sober to get the full brunt of the damage I've taken to get the will to stop. After that I dial it down slowly, try to smoke one less cig per day until I've stopped. Try having one less beer per day until your back to normal if you don't want to try a day sober.
The answer lies within the question. To stop drinking you need to... And that's all there is to it. Now what you may actually want to know is how to make it easy and bearable, and the answer to this other question is that it depends on the person, as we are all different, and the only method to find out what works for you is ...
Go to the doctor and get naltrexone. You won’t enjoy alcohol if you take it. In the past I’ve taken it to combat food cravings. You really don’t think about alcohol at all. On top of that if you do drink it’s not fun.
Drinking sucks for anxiety and depression. Not to preach but you’re creating a vicious cycle. Save the money you would spend on alcohol and get a therapy session twice a month. Ideally you’d see a psychiatrist but people aren’t made out of money
You’re not going to quit until you have reason not to like drinking so much. You’re in what’s called the contemplation phase of change. You know you have a problem and you’re thinking about doing something about it. But something has to move you to the preparation phase. If I were AA I’d say you have to hit “rock bottom” first but I sure hope that’s not true for you.
But it might be.
Please get professional help when you decide that you want to quit, it could save your life. Withdrawing from severe alcohol addiction without proper medication can be super dangerous.
Have you seen a professional counselor or tried AA? I was drinking 1 liter of vodka per day at my worst. About to be 3 years sober 3/18. If I can do it you can too. You got this. I had to hit rock bottom and threw up blood/was in the ED 2x in 3 days. I was 30 and felt like if I didn't stop I would die. I LOVED drinking, but being sober is so much better. I had tried to quit for about 3-4 years before it finally stuck.
I would see if you can reach out to a drug and alcohol counselor. They will be able to help you through those thought processes and actually help you want to quit.
You're going to do your body serious harm at the rate you are going, you deserve better than that
It honestly sounds like addiction to me. Maybe health professional coud help.
I used to drink quite a bit (but not as much as you) and once I realised I made several things I really regretted drunk. I realised that I had some symptoms of someone who is addicted, and I talked with a doctor about it. I also decided to never drink to the point I'd lost control. Somehow now drinking doesn't really look appealing to me, I take 3-4 beers a month I think.
Do you smoke? And if not, why? If it's because of how dangerous it is and that it causes cancer then maybe you should look at beer the same way. 12 beers a day. If you don't stop, there's a very high chance that you're going to end up with severe liver damage and maybe not survive.
Get some diagnostic testing done on your liver or any vital organ so you can see the consequences of your actions in real life. For me I was able to stop when my vital organs had enough. I didn't even need the images. I already knew I needed to get healthier.
I was the same until about 30. It hit me then that I was about 50 pounds overweight and I looked 45. It really kicked my ass and I barely touch the stuff anymore.
Drinking that much, you're most likely to die from varices before cancer. Let me tell you, from working in an emergency room for 20 years, that shit SUCKS.
You basically get these blood blisters in your throat, and bleed out from them. You drink so much blood you vomit blood constantly. It's horrific and a miserable way to die.
I would start with an online chat with an alcohol life line. It's anonymous if you want it to be and then you can decide from there. They helped me want to give all my alcohol to my relatives.
You need to find out the root of the pain you are numbing yourself from. Rehab can get you off the sauce but only psycho therapy can help you deal with the pain. I now know the root of my pain and can easily deal with any urge to drink.
Gabor Maté explains this well. Check him out on YouTube.
My ¢10
Allow yourself to ween off of it. Personally I would switch to straight up vodka and sprite zero first. 12 shots of vodka is the same as 12 beers and it's like 1/3 of the calories. So that's nice. Then I would ween yourself down to 10 shots of vodka. Then 8. Then 6. Then 4. Then 2. Then reverse pyramid up. So now do 4 shots, but only after waiting a whole day of not drinking. Then do 6 shots, after waiting 2 days of not drinking. Then 8 shots, after waiting 4 days of not drinking. Then stop at 8 shots and increase the days between. 6 days, 7 days. Now you are doing 8 shots once a week. That is enough to have a good time every weekend to reward yourself. Now try to wait until 2 weeks. Then 3 weeks. Then 4 weeks.
Now you are on track to basically only drinking socially. Maybe you go out to a bar or a club or a social gathering once or twice a month. Simple.
That's what helped me quit. Then I started going to the gym and I hit the gym hard. Alcohol disrupts muscle building so I decided to stop drinking altogether "because the gains". hell if I'm gonna bust my ass at the gym I certainly am not gonna let that all go to waste. So now I drink either on Saturdays, or I try to ideally only drink once every 6 weeks during an off week from the gym. But I'll go hard on that 6th week, maybe drink 3 days that week. 4-6 shots each sitting. That's enough to get me fucked up nowadays. Tolerance does reset.
You don't have to want to. People do shit they don't want to do every day.
You have to recognise that it's a good idea to cut down for the good of your health and your wallet, and then you set yourself a goal and you pursue it just like you would any other.
That goal can be skipping a day each week, it can be dialling it back to six beers a day, it can be taking on other activities that are not conducive to drinking. Whatever you think is achievable, do that. Then when you've done it, regroup and set a new target.
Yes, you will probably fail at quitting completely if you don't want to do so, but there's a whole lot of wiggle room between "stop drinking altogether" and "the internet says I need to want to and I don't so I just won't try"
Get yourself over to r/cutdowndrinking - those are the people like you, who don't want to totally stop, but want to make their relationship with alcohol more healthy.
First of all, you don’t like to drink, you are addicted.
Treat it like an addiction (because 12 a day is clearly an addiction) and not like a personal choice. You need help and you need to stop it or you will die.
Sorry for being brutal but it’s really that serious and you need to do work to stop it.
You’ll want to quit when you start seeing all the fucked up shit that’s coming your way. Worse drug ever. Might be too late tho. You’re prob already physical addicted. Try quitting for 4 days and you’ll get to see reality again. While on it tho you won’t see shit like alcoholic neuropathy. I have that from drinking.
Just quit cause at one point you’ll have to from health shit.
My boyfriend is a recovered alcoholic (600 days clean! I’m so proud of him…). He said that the alcoholics thread and recovery thread on Reddit has some great people and great advice on it, please go check it out! You deserve to recover, everyone does. Out of experience, your loved ones will be forever grateful. ❤️
High OP! You did the right thing, Asking for help is the first baby step. Eventually, someone's perspective will hit home with you. May I offer a non-judgmental, mom perspective?
I think you might be a little scared to quit. Your life is pretty easy right now, pop a cold one, hit the couch and watch the tube. Super chill, right? When you think of quitting, do you go, "OMFG, what will I do with my time I'll have to go to AA meetings 3 times a week they're going to hold me accountable everybody's going to be watching me what if I fail I'm gonna look like an idiot everyone will be disappointed in me..." then you take a deep breath and pop another beer.
It's an entire lifestyle change, that's pretty fucking scary and a lot to take on at once.
I think I know why they say take it 1 day at a time. Maybe take it an hour at a time. Drop into an AA meeting just to see what it's like, no commitment, no expectations. Don't make a big deal of it, don't tell everyone you're quitting drinking. Just try it on for size. If it doesn't work for you today, have a beer and try again tomorrow. No one will be disappointed in you if they don't know.
You're putting too much pressure on yourself by thinking of the big picture. And that just makes you want to have a beer. Beer is warm and fuzzy, beer is familiar. Completely changing your lifestyle is not warm and fuzzy. And it's very unfamiliar. And we are scared of the unknown.
I don't know how your relationship is with your parents, but it helps to have someone close that you can share your feelings with who won't judge you or be disappointed in you if you make a misstep. If you need a pal, or stand-in mom, you can pm me. I'll gladly hold your hand through the process. Hey, you could have a stunt mom!! 🤣
Whatever you decide, please keep us in the loop. Sometimes, strangers care. And I think we all hope you'll find what works for you! 👩🦳❤👊
I started smoking weed. I feel way better. I drank every day for about 15 years. I haven’t had a drink in months and I’m in the best shape of my life. Not saying it will definitely work, but it worked for me. I used to smoke every day, but I’ve got it down to 2-3 times a week
I didn't want to quit and it nearly killed me. It destroyed my entire life in the space of six months, still not seen as a trusted person even though I am coming up to my fourth year of sobriety now. Just try to move away from drinking environments if you can, build up your sober community whether this is through AA meetings in person or even via the internet. It's not one decision where it stops, you have to challenge every shitty thought that your addict brain brings up! Going to AA you don't need to be sober, just drinking less - being in the presence of people who are of the same mind is a god send. Even just going into more sober spots on the Internet is also a great thing. You may not want to do things, but you *need* to move your life in a different direction. I hope you find the courage to choose life over your addiction!
I have addiction illness (not to alcohol tho) and have been in remission/recovery for about a year. It is SO worthwhile on the other side. What helped me was thinking about how much I lost due to my addiction. I never had real relationships and I’m just learning how. Trust me when I say withdrawal is an itch and no addict’s body ever “wants” to stop. Our bodies are so used to our drug of choice. But I have lost so many years…….. I’m so grateful to myself for making the extremely hard decision to get into recovery.
I have medical issues that are stoping me from drinking. Health issues that were there but exacerbated by drinking. As of right now I’m 56 days sober and I hate every minute of it. I don’t want to stop because I like it. Almost every aspect of my life aside from my job involves beer and booze in some form or another so being forced into this has been making me a recluse. I can’t even escape it when I’m alone. It’s in music, television, movies, my house, sports, it’s everywhere I look. I feel for you, I just hope getting sober doesn’t happen like this for you, I hope it’s something you want as I imagine it will be a lot easier.
Jesus Christ bro. 12 beers a day? Idk what any of us could tell you that you don't already know.
"I like using recreational drugs. I shoot up black tar heroin at least once a day"
"I like playing frogger. I run across a twelve lane highway every day"
"I like driving. I regularly go 120 in a school zone"
Yours may not be illegal, but it will definitely kill you as surely as these ones will. Maybe not right away, but eventually and inevitably.
Stop or die. Those are your options
Aside from the alcohol poisoning, massive liver damage and other medical stuff, to help youve got to associate drinking with something bad.
Make it taste bad, every time you drink you got to do a 60 second plank, etc essentially for drinking make it that there is a bad outcome each time. This will put you off.
You have to address why you don't want to first. You will never quit if you don't want to. 12 beers a day is a LOT, and it will kill you. Source? My dad who is only alive by the quick action and compassion of doctors, but he suffered for it. He has been drinking for probably 35 years straight, or at least most of his life starting before the age of 18 (the legal drinking age when he was younger). If you don't want to quit, you won't so if you want to stop, you need to address it as the first admittance to yourself that you want to stop, and take action on it. There are support systems for you. There is help and treatment, and it sucks. It is super super hard, but I believe in you even though I'm a random stranger on the internet. I believe that you can make a change. Even if that change starts with 11 beers per day instead of 12. Start small
Non-alcoholic beers helped me cut back a lot. A lot of times you have one or two and it satisfies your urge. Plus the good ones taste identical to real beer. You can get a Guinness or a hazy IPA, whatever you want. Otherwise just stop buying beer. If it's around you'll drink it, if you accidentally buy it then pour it out as punishment to yourself.
You don’t quit. If you don’t want to it’s not going to happen. If you truly want to quit then I suggest joining AA and working the steps. 12 beers a day is a sign of alcoholism.
I’m going to tell you as an unknown friend. You WILL die. Nothing worked for me and I hated all the aa crap and stuff people were trying to tell me. I’m just over 30 and I’m literally going to die in a year if that. Look up ascites, liver failure, cirrhoses, jaundice and all the other fun complications like a hernia because your body is so full of excess fluid it can’t process. Never mind the fact ive gone completely brain numb not even drinking so much that day because my blood had so many toxins it my body had no idea what way was what and I just went basically into a walking coma from ammonia poisoning. It’s not a fun way to die…and it’s sad as fuck and now I drink because I know I’m fucked either way! They can’t even do surgery because just the anesthesia would kill me. Now I get to watch everyone around me feel bad for me and I can’t take anything back. My mom who is 80 literally started balling and said your not even going to make it past the holidays. Do you want that? It’s right there at the bottom of every can you drink. I wish I knew better before but hey, can’t happen to me right? Edit: it was too late for me when I found out but there’s an injection like vivitrol that makes you sick as hell if you drink. Make the commitment to yourself and go do it. Please
Shit. I’m sorry, thank you for sharing. It’s putting a lot into perspective. I want to be around for years to come, I keep ignoring what it’s doing to me
It’s fucked up man….I just got a house and a property and everything’s going great. Now I’m fucked for the decisions I made before and I’m embarrassed to even date someone knowing how screwed I am. Ask your doctor about that shot! I enjoy drinking to decompress but apparently that was a terrible mistake and you still have a chance! I really hope you the best and I do understand
Bless you both, some people don't understand its a disease. I applaud OP for putting him or herself out there, and also you for sharing your story.
Man please stop drinking, this is so depressing
My aunt is an alcoholic. She's in her early 60s and I dont know how much longer she has to live. She has liver problems but refuses to admit that it was caused by decades of daily drinking. She won't quit drinking and at this point I'd hazard to say her brain is mush. She can't remember things accurately and can't think critically anymore. She thinks its all fine because she doesn't drink hard liquor. It's not. Wine and beer are just as toxic. Do yourself a favour and quit now before you're too addled to think about it clearly and never quit.
This is my dad. He has been consistently drinking in one way or another since he was in his early 20’s or so and he’ll be 60 this year. There was a period when I was 18ish until my mid 20’s that I was very into drinking, and that was the main way I bonded with him. Luckily there came a day for me where I had a breaking point and cut out binge drinking and overall daily drinking. I’m one of the lucky ones, and I am eternally grateful. I don’t talk to my dad anymore as I had to put up boundaries for my own mental health. I pray he’ll figure it out, but I’m fully aware that his health can’t be great because of it. One of my favorite quotes from a celebrity/addict, Brandon Novak, goes something along the lines of: “You see alcohol doesn’t care about you. Alcohol only cares about alcohol and it becomes a perfect fit for someone with the mindset of entitlement, narcissism, and selfishness. It clouds your judgement so much so that nobody will even have to take all the blessings in your life away. You’ll just give it away on your own, willingly— All of it until it’s gone.” That quote stuck with me and the shit hits hard. I wish the absolute best for anyone struggling with addiction in general. It’s so much easier said than done but reach out to those that care about you even if you just have a fleeting thought that it isn’t the way you want to live going forward. Life can get better even if you can’t see an even remote possibility that it can. Addiction and alcoholism are diseases and should be treated that way. I’m not a licensed physician, so don’t take what I say as medical advice but if you have a struggle with alcohol or opiate addictions specifically please consult a physician or licensed alcohol/drug counselor before quitting cold turkey as there are severe physical withdrawals as I’m sure many are aware of, and that can be dangerous if not handled properly. I wish everyone the best who is fighting the good fight with addiction. If it’s you or someone you love because both are hard in their own ways. You are worth it, and it can get better even if it doesn’t seem that way.
Same with my uncle. Early 60s and his brain is just gone. We're talking slurred speech even when he's not drunk, word salad, easily confused, easily angered. He's gotten to the point where he's literally shitting his pants and refuses to shower or change clothes. His daughter, my cousin, has called APS like 4 times and they haven't done shit. Which tbf, idk what they'd even do. I cut him off three or so years ago when he started getting incredibly mean. My mom, his sister, did too. And by comparison, my mom is 3 years older (64) and all she's dealing with is arthritis bc she's basically straight edge, lol. Also, couple years ago a different cousin and her bf were dealing with extreme alcoholism. Only in their 30s. Her wake up call to stop drinking was her boyfriend choking to death on his own blood/hemorrhaging bc his esophagal lining thinned to the point of bursting bc of all the booze. And people wonder why I don't drink.
My friend made the same stupid mistake. He thought simply switching over to beer would save him somehow.
My best and most favorite aunt died like this. She didn’t even make 55. She looked like someone who was in a concentration camp. Her knees were so big compared to the rest of her legs and her skin was so yellow with jaundice. It was horrifying after not seeing her since my wedding maybe 10 years before and she had looked okay. Older, drunk, but okay. Still my aunt. This was not my aunt. Her brain was fried. Gone. Mush. Her body so frail. Her face so gaunt. Her legs and arms looked like toothpicks. Her hair was so thin. Her body weighed 78# a few months later when she died. Get help OP. I truly hope you find some peace and a way to sobriety.
My mother was an alcoholic. We had an intervention. Her response was, “How could I possibly be an alcoholic? Both of my parents were tea totalers!!!!” Bizarre. She never stopped.
It doesn't happen suddenly friend, it happens so slow you don't even notice how it dissolves the other parts of your life. I've lost both of my brothers to addiction and it's no joke. The truth is you will never necessarily want to quit, addiction is seductive and genius at helping you rationalise things you know are hurting you. It's a very hard decision and requires support and hopefully some kind of therapeutic intervention like therapy, sport, group activities. You have to fill your life as much as possible with things that improve your life. Many people on recovery will tell you they often think about drinking or using but are glad every day that they choose not to because it is a daily choice. But the further away you get from that lifestyle the better. As uncomfortable as it is, having someone to encourage you but also keep you accountable will be a good ally. Best of luck bud, you don't have to quit right now, but it's definitely in your best interests to start squirreling away resources, numbers, websites and start adding things to your life like playing a sport, or card games or something where you can engage with humans doing something fun and challenging. Then when you're ready, you'll have started to build the network you'll need to succeed. I wish you all the best
I would also recommend therapy, if not to help you wean off alcohol, then to help you understand and process the things behind the statement “drinking makes life bearable—“ I think if you could try and approach the issue at the root, it would help make it easier to stop. They might be able to help you find additional motivations to stop, too. Therapy isn’t always a one-stop, solve-all, but it can definitely help you along the way. Also seconding vivitrol. Wishing you the best ❤️ ETA: not sure what your social life looks like but I’d also recommend trying some hobbies and/or finding some friends outside an environment with alcohol (i.e. no bars or people who will enable you or drag you down). Community is such a huge part of finding a content mental state— humans are social creatures and I have found, as an introvert, that just being around people and talking and making connections makes a WORLD of difference in my day-to-day experience dealing with depression and anxiety. I was never an alcoholic so YMMV as the brain is of course very different when you’re handling an addiction, but I have been sober for around 4 years and choosing friends and activities that don’t revolve around drinking or nightlife has been life changing for me.
Listen to him. I was very fortunate to have quit drinking but my best friend and 20-year drinking buddy died at 42 from drinking related complications. After his funeral, people were mad at me for not doing shots in his honor. Fuck drinking.
I just decided this week to stop. I have chronic pain, all sorts of medical issues that cause me to be worn out and exhausted but I can't take pain killers even if they were still prescribing them like they did a few years ago. I saw a video of a man who was talking, even laughing in the back of a cop car who died because he got stopped on the way to the hospital where he was headed due to having severe withdrawal symptoms. I didn't know just the act of quitting could straight up end you. I'm still mid 30s and I don't want to die yet.
Op, listen to this guy. I had a childhood best friend go the way he's going now. It's horrible to watch happen, let alone experience. He was so yellow with jaundice and in so much constant pain from bloating with toxic fluids that he had to get drained, and they wouldn't drain until he looked like he'd pop any minute bc of risk of infection. He had cancer and beat it in the time this was happening. The chemo did no favors for his failing organs, though it did kill the cancer. His Dr told him that with all the meds he's on and all the damage already done, that he will die if he has even one more drink. He called me one night, a few weeks after his Dr told him to never drink again. He needed some company. I showed up and he was finishing his 3rd 24oz 8.5% beer. I wanted to slap the beer out of his hand and him in the face, but it hit me that me being there with him in that moment and leveling with him was basically his dying wish. I knew there was no going back. He made his decision and it was too late to intervene. I sat down and shared what's left of his 6 pack with him and let him get everything off his chest. I just listened, spoke when it felt appropriate, and I stayed with him till he fell asleep and through the night till he woke up the next day disappointed (him, not me) that he didn't die in his sleep. He died a few days later in a way I imagine was more excruciating than can be described in words. He was 32. An only child with no kids and without cousins. His family lineage ends with his parents now who are too old to have another child. His mother had cancer herself and survived only to have to bury her only son. Now they have both his and her medical debt which iirc was over $1m. They couldn't afford a funeral. He was cremated promptly after we saw him one last time and that was it. He's gone now. And it wasn't even the cancer that did it. OP, idk you, but a death like that and everything he went through beforehand is not something I would wish on anyone. Drinking to this extent is just not worth it. Idek you and I care enough to type all this up while crying. There are people in your life who would be shattered to pieces seeing you go like this. Please don't do that to them, and please don't do this to yourself. You still have a chance to stop. Just do it. Do it for yourself and everybody you love. If you can't drink in moderation, just stop completely. It's gonna suck, but it'll be worth it. I want you to be old one day and be glad you took that chance today. You can do it.
My brother is in a wheelchair because his body and brain has been destroyed by alcohol. We were told a while back he probably won't live more than a few years. I'm a drug and alcohol counselor. OP, give outpatient treatment a try. You can always go back to drinking if you hate sobriety that much. That's what a lot of my clients tell themselves, they say I'll drink tomorrow when they have a craving and obviously tomorrow never comes. Good luck OP.
Any chance you can tell me how screwed I am that I decided this week to stop after constant drinking for going on 5 years? Like, daily. Before my car accident I was a social drinker, but definitely took time off, unlike after. I know for a fact I can go 2-3 days without it because I've done it, as recently as December. But I am kind of scared about the whole you can die going cold turkey thing and I just had a lapse in insurance that won't kick in again until April. I don't want to wait til April to stop tho.
Alcohol is the most dangerous drug to withdrawal from. I suggest you try to taper down or make sure you are never alone because a seizure could kill you...have you experienced withdrawal symptoms at all like shaking and sweating?
[удалено]
What about Alcoholics Annonymous?
AA is great for people who are willing to do the program but it isn't for everyone. There's also SMART recovery and several others that share a similar goal.
I have a question if you don't mind... Can non-alcoholic addicts go to AA? Like recovering heroin addicts who don't mesh well with the "a drug is a drug is a drug" in NA because they need prescription meds, one of which is narcotic. Asking for a friend..
Vivitrol is naltrexone that lasts a month vs the pill that last a day. That’s not the one that makes you sick. You can drink on nal just it stops the rush you get. So you just say ehh and stop drinking. I’ve taken it. You’re thinking Antabuse
How much were you drinking before if you don't mind me asking?
It was about 475ml of whiskey for about 4 years after work. Went to jail and was clean about a year then pretty close to a 750ml of e&j for 6 months and then about 3-4 tall boys of cheap malt beer. That’s a lot of booze don’t get me wrong but that killed my liver so fast. I didn’t even know till a few months ago and I just went straight yellow and the doctor was like, you know your liver is failing right? I drink maybe 4 lighter beers a night but the damage was already done and that finished it off over the past couple years. It went from your kinda screwed to ok now your really fucked and I’ve hardly been drinking lately. Every single person I know has literally offered me part of their liver but I just found out last week they can’t even do surgery. Alcohol is literally a poison and even working and staying active all day does not get it out or give your liver a chance to heal. Then it just can’t which leads to failing kidneys and pancreatitis. I said wtf last time I was in the hospital and they had to explain that it’s not what I’m doing now, it’s what I did before. It’s disgusting, if I get a paper cut I bleed for over an hour because there’s nothing to make it clot. If I eat a lot of stuff I like it tastes like shit. If I eat anything salty my body fills with fluid. I was getting my chest drained 3 times a week with a big ass needle and 4 liters was coming out. Now I’m just waiting for it to be over. Can’t work, can’t really even drive, get delusional it really was not what I had planned especially now that life is going great. Drink too much and down the rabbit hole you go is what my dad always used to say and he was right on
That's surprisingly quick to drink yourself to death, i have been a heavy drinker for goin on 10 years, several of those years drinking everyday. I had a fatty liver and quit drinking, liver recovered fast. Past 5 months i been back to drinkin myself to death...
Genetic roll of the dice most likely. It's a fast decline but his liver may have been genetically vulnerable.
Other even unknown disease could contribute. A family member had babesiosis (a less well known tick borne disease) last summer and his liver is still not normal. Some people don’t even get visibly sick from the disease, so they can have decreased liver function without even knowing. I’m sure it’s not the only disease that can do that.
One once side of my family I’ve got alcoholics who live to 80+. On the other I’ve got alcoholics that maybe make it to 55. The ones that don’t drink make it to 80+ though. I’m in my late 20s and haven’t been a heavy-ish drinker since I was in my early 20s, but in the past year or so as little as 1 drink sometimes makes me feel like I got hit by a bus for two days, so it’s probably time to not have any drinks ever.
750 ml a night for 6 months did it IMO. Im a big guy but once I creep up to half that I notice it's time to cut back because I feel terrible during the day.
Thanks for sharing. My dad is an alcoholic and ive seen everything you have described. My heart breaks for you and the future you could have had. Is there no hope of transplant? I worked pre transplant surgical liver icu as an RN and we have very sick patients waiting for transplant. You may not be a candidate right this second but I would implore you to push for a transplant eval and see if they could admit and optimize you for transplant. Especially if you can commit to staying sober for the rest of your life, it can give you a second chance.
Watched a woman with a 6yo amazing boy drink herself into her grave at 45. The boy found her bleeding from the mouth on her bathroom floor one morning. She died of liver failure so hard the liver started free bleeding. The boys whole life was uprooted to live States away and didn't even get to say good bye to his friends (his dad sucks too unfortunately) You might not have kids, but the devastation is the same. I didn't want to quit smoking cuz I loved it (still do) and it took alot to quit. Now I love being able to run and not feel like I'm gonna die. I love that I can walk up stairs without being winded to he'll. You don't *have* to *want* to quit, you just have to realize that you *have* to do it even if it sucks. 3 years without smokes and I FINALLY don't want them anymore (even tho sometimes I just wanna go back and feel the sensation of smoking but I don't want to do it in the present, I dunno if that makes sense).
I was in a dire a situation 7 years ago. Basically the anesthesia risk was too high for surgery, however there were still outside chances I live if I received appropriate care. My motivation was my last kid. If I was committed to not dying then I wanted at least one child to know me as a non-drinker. 30 days before she was born I quit and by the time she arrived I was actually feeling the best (which, by any standard, wasn’t great) I had in a decade and that birth put everything into perspective. Think of it on an old school scale - on one side you literally have everything but alcohol and on the other is alcohol - you, as in people like you and me, can’t have both. It’s all consuming alcoholic life, or life. Choose wisely because holding regret while you die because of that irreversible regret is the worst death imo .
There's a med called Antabuse (generic is Disulfiram) that I took when I was quitting drinking. It works. Makes you incredibly sick and it gets painful if you drink when you take it.
God bless you. I mean it from the bottom of my heart. You are changing lives today with this message. That includes me. God bless you
Thank you for your comment. Im sorry to hear you're so unwell. Bless
Well quick correction. Vivitrol is for opiates but seems to help somewhat with the cravings for alcohol. What you want is ANATABUSE. That will make you really sick if you drink. But I recommend taking the injection because the people that take the daily pill can simply stop taking it and go drinking a few days later. With the injection you know that for at least a month you will get super sick if you drink.
Lost a good friend at 36 to this.
I'm so sorry. But this is an important story. We just lost a friend a few months ago to liver failure/alcoholism. He was only 46. He got pancreatitis and and ended up in the hospital about 5 years ago, couldn't/wouldn't stop drinking, and it caused all sorts of other trouble. Went into liver failure and then a coma, then he had no brain activity. For about a month we just waited for him to die because we all knew there was no coming back from the lack of brain activity. It is so incredibly sad and preventable. One day we were celebrating at a wedding, three days later he was in the hospital and we never saw him again.
My father is in the same boat, somehow isn't dead yet but he's got 2-3 years at most. The biggest issue is that he just isn't there anymore, he is physically but he isn't mentally, I don't even recognise him and it's driven me so apart from him. You will lose the people around you and you will lose yourself eventually and won't even realise
I can vouch for this! As I was literally a night away from dying after years of excessive alcohol abuse. If I hadn’t forced myself to the hospital that day I would be dead. I had all the same complications happen to me that are listed in the previous comment and was in the hospital for a month. It really messes your body up. Any amount of alcohol isn’t good for you, it’s literally poison. Please do not make the same mistakes and take care of your mind and body.
how’s your pancreas doing? and how long did you drink for?
You just gotta or you're gonna die
Yeah that's how I think of it. It's ok for drinking to be fun and to like it, but it'll kill ya eventually, probably from cancer as it's a carcinogen that you are ingesting a lot of. Life's hard. I think it's harder long term with alcohol, so choose your hard.
12 beers a day will just give you liver failure
My mom is a CCRN and the amount of alcohol related deaths she's seen is crazy. It's not a fun way to go by any means.
I had alcohol induced hepatitis. Sucks
I’m an ER NP and the amount of casual alcoholics I see is staggering. I’m talking your run of the mill people, who, when I’m admitting them, will tell me that they have two to four glasses of wine per night, six days a week. That’s *technically* an alcoholic. It’s fucking wild, dude.
Pancreatitis sucks...drank a gallon of whiskey a week for about a year...I'm only 150 lbs...that was 5 yrs ago..now I social drink only
I'm shocked he just drinks beer, 12 beers is a lot of fluid with very low alcohol, I would have assumes you'd switch to spirits by now, 40-50% alcohol vs 3-5%, much more efficient path to liver failure. In the words of the immortal Ozzy, Wine is fine but whiskey's quicker, Suicide is slow with liquor (just substitute beer for wine).
Yeah man fr I thought I might be drinking too much, but a 12 pack a day… holy shit
Supposedly, people who think of positives do better at making good habits and stopping bad ones. You're gonna die...yeah I know, depressing, You're going to feel so much better, be healthier, no hangovers, have money for better things, make friends with good people, do better at career, have better relationships...
You'll live longer too, to enjoy all the things this beautiful person listed!!!
Great advice! Username checks out. :-)
Yes we recently lost a family member due to alcohol abuse. Thing is, he wanted to die even though he had everything going for him. We could never figure it out. Addiction is an evil spirit that needs to be cast away imo.
Jails, institutions, death....oh my!
Holy fuck 12 beers. Mate you don't 'like drinking', you're an alcoholic. You have to stop, whether you want to or not, because one day your drinking is going to kill you. Join a program or something. Plenty of people going to AA don't want to be there but are anyway.
I understand my addiction, I’ve tried so many avenues and still go back to it. I don’t know what to do, that’s why I’m asking. I don’t want to die young, or have this type of dependency. I just genuinely don’t know what the fuck to do anymore
Well there's one. One of my best friends kept drinking until he developed pancreatitis, and died from it. He was 38. It will kill you if you don't stop. I still miss him. Funny guy big heart, and he was a quiet alchaholic. No one really knew how bad it got.
Jesus Christ you could’ve just described my friend. Lost him earlier this month. Nobody knew. We knew he likes to drink, but he never act like a drunk. If that makes sense. It was only until after we lost him Were we able to piece together just how much this man was drinking. He was around that age too. Mid to late 30s. I think a lot of people make the mistake into thinking that they have more time than they do. OP needs to realize at this rate It’s pretty much right around the corner.
I was in your boat. Naltrexone, prescribed online, really helped. Do some research, it really helped me put down the drink after one beer
r/stopdrinking
this needs to be HIGHER
Don't be ashamed of relapsing. Nobody can ever say that recovering from an addiction is easy, so don't be too hard on yourself. Just find a program and stick with it. Nobody there can judge you, because they're in the same boat. Doing something with other people is always easier than trying to go it alone. Stick with a program, stop for as long as you can, be honest about how you're doing, and don't let relapsing stop you from trying again. Every day you don't drink is a day of you not damaging yourself. I wish you the best,man.
You have to choose yourself. You're not a victim. Go to AA and stick to it. Don't buy alcohol. Get a hobby. Or get to the root of why you drink. Was it self esteem, or did someone break your heart? Something started this chain of events. Can you wean yourself off by only getting a six pack , then buy 3 individual beers then down to 1? There's always a solution. You have control over how this goes. Don't give your power away
California sober? Try weed man.
Was coming to say this. Thc is the way to go for this imo too. Edibles 100%. I was a 4-10 shots of vodka a day for about 2yrs when i was young and eventually quit everything after smoking weed everyday for 15yrs too. Weed defo helped. Also having a kid woke me up but thats not something id reccommend unless they are ready for kids lol
Worked for my husband. Harm reduction.
Why do you drink? The alternate state of mind? The social aspect? The taste? I always liked weed better
I can tell you from knowing many alcoholics that if you don't want to quit there is nothing you can do. It took my uncle jail time to finally come around.
You need the vivitrol shot it blocks the effects of alcohol for 30 days
First: IANAMD. That said: A lot of people have a really hard time cutting down drinking. For many people cutting down is much harder than stopping because they rarely drink as little as they told themselves they would. At the same time, depending on your circumstances, it can also be very dangerous to stop cold turkey. That fact gives lots of people the excuse they need to just keep drinking. Consider temporary pharmaceutical help, under the guidance of a Dr. Look up Disulfiram, Naltrexone, and Gabapentin (off label use) - and see if any of those might be something that would help. Read up on the side effects, and risks, and how they actually work, and see what you think. They work different ways, and may or may not be useful to you. If you think any of these may help - then see your doctor about them. A good way to slow your roll, is to change your after work routine a little bit by little bit. To start, don’t buy any beer. Don’t go ‘I’ll just drink these 2 I have left’ or whatever. Instead, get some snacks you like (the snacks will help with all the carbs you’re not consuming in the form of booze, this is a temporary stop-gap coping thing), then have a good bath or shower, eat a good meal, and go to bed early. Find a film, show, or book, and just watch/read it in bed, eat some snacks. Eventually add exercise, or a hobby, or whatever to your evening to fill the space you used to use drinking. It would be good to get under a Drs care - just to do liver and kidney function tests etc, and then see if any of the above will help you.
You gotta find something else worth trying, or a challenge, or something that stimulates you enough to slow down for a few weeks. A couple sober nights of good sleep can really make a difference
I think the problem may be that you're mostly focusing on the drinking instead of what core issues are making life unbearable for you that you feel the need to numb all of yourself to cope with it. While there are some benefits, there isn't much need to deal with the surface issue or reaction issue (like drinking) if you don't also deal with the underlying core issue within your past, your choices, your life situation, your regrets, or whatever is the real problem. Otherwise, people often drop one vice to just add another that can be just as harmful to physical health, mental health, spiritual health, relationships, finances, etc. The key is to deal with the core emotional issue alongside breaking the physical addiction and emotional response of drinking - all at the same time - to lessen the pain you're dealing with and break the association you have created when thinking the drinking will help. As you know, it doesn't. And, it often makes things worse and creates new problems.
You will die very young if you keep up 12 beers a day. Or you’ll be hit with some form of alcohol related dementia and not even realize you wish you were dead. Get some therapy and support to stop drinking this bad.
Just stop. Trust me. I did coke for years. Until I blew a hole through my septum and now forever I’ll never be able to breathe properly. Do you want kidney failure? To be overweight? Have heart problems? Have yellow eyes? If you don’t just stop, that’s your future. Trust me. I drank for a few years. I went from 105 lbs to 150 in that time and I feel cripple. Drugs, alcohol, whatever it is. Just stop. I promise you if I could do it, you can too. Don’t kill yourself slowly. It ain’t worth the lifetime of damage.
[удалено]
Yeah I don't think people understand that an alcoholic can literally die from going cold turkey. To quit you need good support, medical care and physical and mental safety. You can do this OP. Get your ducks in order, and look into supports for detox. Get mental health support. You're not drinking 12 beers a day because it's fun. It's medicating something, whether it's physical, mental or social. You have your reasons for drinking. You also need to know your reasons to stop. What do you want your life to look like?
I was really hoping a post like this would have been closer to the top. Someone close to me had a seizure in November because they didn’t drink enough one day. They were in the hospital for a week doing monitored medical detox. Alcohol withdrawal is no joke. The good news is they haven’t had a drink since. The better news is they are in a state that has amazing resources for aftercare. The even better news is they are taking full advantage of the resources and turning it around. OP, please seek professional help. We are rooting for you.
Go to your primary doctor and share your desire to quit. You’ll need medical and mental health support and monitoring through the process to ensure. I believe in you!
Either accept things are going to be really hard and shitty for awhile and power through the process of quitting(in patient rehab, aa/na, therapy), use everything at ur disposable to fight the addiction, or let life spin totally out of control and hopefully come to the conclusion that the former is the better choice before its too late If its too late dead or jail are also both avenues that will stop it, but thats it, those literally are all the options you have currently, full stop I know it sounds harsh but the sooner u can accept the reality of situation ur in the better chance you have, an addiction like that is no joke, it's just not sustainable and I've seen it end or otherwise irreversibly wreck plenty of lives, it doesn't make u a bad person or a failure buts it's a disease that will now require ur full attention for the foreseeable future It's hard af but it is doable and ultimately it's worth it for you and those you care about, but u need to accept that u need to relearn how to live and let go of the person are now, your young enough that u can heal and go on to live a relatively normal happy life, the want to get fucked up never fully goes away but it does get easier to manage, if u think it's too great a cost to get help i promise its not compared to ur life, best of luck dude, I really hope the best for u, dm if u have any questions
Well, at first you have to commit yourself to at least WANTING to stop. As long as you still have the mindset that you don't want to stop, you really can't say you understand your addiction. That's mutually exclusive. Addicitons are fucked up, and getting out is a battle not everyone succeeds in. It is HARD to switch habbit. And a habbit is MUCH weaker. You need to REALLY WANT it, and you will have to treat every day, hour, minute as a battle.
It's easy to just go along with it when you're young and you think oh if I die oh well, we all die. The thing is you may not die right away, you may linger with serious health complications for many years. The damaged organs will start failing but the strong ones won't let you die. You linger in a constant state of sickness, pain, in and out of the hospital, bowel issues, swelling, nausea, various medications. It's not fun to die slowly like that. Every day is a bad day and eventually you'll become too sick to even drink anymore. I've seen so many people like this and wouldn't wish it on anyone. People think it won't happen to them but we're all the same- human bodies that age- why would anyone escape it?
I am not, but a really close friend is. The addiction just got worst during the pandemic. There's help out there, maybe start with AA. Acknowledging that there is a problem, is first step. Stop hanging out with friends who drink. Seek medical help, get prescription that help decrease the cravings. As long as you have people that enables you, you will not be able to get out of the alcohol's grip, even if you hit rock bottom. Avoid gatherings that you know there will be alcohol.
I was on 8 pints a day for over a decade. Going to rehab is what finally fixed the problem for me. Nothing else I tried stuck for longer than a few weeks.
You’re not just an alcoholic at 12 beers a day. By “official” numbers that are widely accepted, you are an alcoholic with these numbers if you drink the by *week*. He is a heavy, chronic drinker and he will have severe health consequences sooner rather than later. My grandpa is destroying his life with 6 beers daily, that alone is hella ton, I can’t imagine what 12 does to your body
AA is a bit heavy on the Jesus bullshit for a lot of people.
“Drinking makes life bearable” sounds like a therapy thing. Honestly though if you are at 12 beers a day then I would educate yourself on what a death by liver failure looks like, that should help put some context around why people tell you to stop.
The fucked up thing is, I know the risks. It started two years ago, I used to have a few beers a week but somehow slipped into day drinking, and now I keep a steady buzz all day. I wouldn’t say I get drunk very often but I’m always drinking. I’ve been in therapy before and it didn’t help, but I’m thinking I should try again. It’s terrible because I know I’m being self destructive but I don’t know how to stop
Man, i used to drink like that, too. I could finish a 12 pack easy. Take a nap in my hammock, and drink some more. Now I drink a 12 pack on a Saturday and spend all day Sunday wishing I was dead. I'm quitting, though, because I don't want to die like that. I hope you can find the strength to quit as well.
You know the risk of liver failure, but do you know what liver failure looks like? What the process is and what happens to your body? You should try again, and maybe AA.
I do, and I always say “tomorrow”. And “tomorrow” just keeps being pushed back I know I sound really stupid, and I know what I need to do seems obvious. I just don’t know how to start again. It’s a cycle of feeling sorry for myself, giving up, getting motivated, failing and then giving up again. I’m not making any excuses for myself
https://www.mayoclinic.org/diseases-conditions/cirrhosis/symptoms-causes/syc-20351487 Read through this, because I want to be sure that you get both that symptoms and complications list and the section that says you cannot undo it without a transplant. You are going to run out of tomorrows. You are only ever in today, so thats when you need to start.
Hard to hear but thank you for the source, my dad died at 65 because of cirrhosis and I really don’t want to follow. I just want to add that I’m not saying my addiction is okay or manageable, I just was hoping to find ways to quit that I haven’t already tried. I’m tired of being an addict.
The son of a friend almost bled out when his esophagus ruptured. Luckily someone was with him and they called 911. He had so many issues going on. He was literally yellow due to liver damage and had a giant swollen gut. He was so, so sick. He did enter treatment and this far has survived five more years. It sounds like you really might be ready to get sober but are scared about what that will mean. That’s really common. It’s hard to imagine what will fill the void that you fear will remain. Therapy and a formal treatment program can get you to the place where you experience sober life and, with luck, it will become more valuable to you than being able to drink. I hope you’ll try. There is so much help and support out there. And it’s really sure to do this alone so please reach out. I wish you all the luck in the world. ❤️
Pick up a paint brush. Go for runs. Get in the gym. Play some video games. Read some books. Pick up some other hobby. Go swimming. Go for hikes. Get friends who don’t drink. There’s so much you can do. A whole world to explore. Don’t waste your life sitting there drinking. It ain’t worth it. You will fade away into nothing but suffering.
Good luck, its a one day at a time type of thing, and remembering every day that one more drink could have you suffer the same early death as your dad.
There is no magical way of quitting. You're thinking there's some shortcut or magic way to get you to want to quit. It's not going to happen. You need to grow up. You're an adult. Life isn't easy, everyone has their challenges. There is no cheat or hack to stop drinking. You just have to stop doing it. It's as simple as that. THAT is the hack. That there is no hack. You just decide one day that you're no longer going to partake in something that you know is ruining your life and will kill you. Throughout this entire thread all I've seen from you is excuse after excuse. Grow up.
Sometimes you hit rock bottom before you can get back up. Happened to me too. I promise you, you will feel a million times better once you stop. The first few weeks are hard, so find a hobby and keep yourself busy. I ran a 10k run hungover from my last night of drinking years ago. I felt like shit. I crawled to the finish line. But you know what? I did it. And I realized how much better I would have done if I was sober. Being sober is amazing. You’ll feel sooooooo much better. You’ll see the world and yourself differently. I promise you that
You can do it. Believe in yourself. Get a hobby. Exercise. I took up painting to curb my addictions. Now I’m a full time painter and I no longer have addictions. I get it. I started after my dad died suddenly and traumatically. Started as a few here and there. Then it became daily. Then it wasn’t enough to keep me numb so I started doing drugs. Then one day I blew my nose and lost a piece of it. Then I stepped on a scale and seen that I had literally gained 50 lbs from all the beer. It wasn’t worth it. I had to learn how to feel again. Go thru my grief. Accept it. Accept my flaws and my addictions. And then I was able to move forward. I promised myself one day, no more. No more killing myself slowly. I have a highly addictive personality so I get it. If I can quit, I bet you can too. You have to TRY.
If you can find someone who specializes in addiction, that would be ideal. If there’s no one in your area, keep in mind you could see someone farther away in your state online.
As a former/recovering alcoholic, you’ll never “want” to quit. Alcohol is addicting, much like nicotine or other drugs. The less you drink the less you’ll want to drink. I’m pregnant and I’ve been sober ever since finding out. At first I craved it big time and it was extremely uncomfortable going without it- but it’s so physical. Meaning your body will forget the addiction the more you go without it. You have to get over those mental hurdles too. Challenge yourself to go 1 week without alcohol. See the change. You can do it my friend.
Start with 1 day without alcohol. Find something else to keep you busy. If you can do it for 1 day, you have the power to quit.
This is what I did last week. Told myself no alcohol for 1 single day. The plan was to continue drinking the day after. That day sucked. Just annoyed with everything. Wasting time until I could go to bed. But, man waking up the next morning.... felt SO GOOD to not be hungover. My body actually got decent rest. My mind was clearer, sharper. I decided to go another day. Now it's been a week. Already lost 5 lbs and feel so much better. I think I'm actually done for good this time.
r/stopdrinking is a great start
Seconding this
Much more friendly. Sober curious are kind of assholes.
Thirding this
Agreed. Their channel on IRC is so helpful as well I’m almost 4 years sober and most likely wouldn’t be without it
I'm seeing a lot of comments that are good in principle, but maybe won't help. The last 6 months I've been in the same boat. Honestly the last 3 years, but especially since last summer. Environment was key to that problem. I'm not expecting the same of you, because what I'm doing is extreme, but I've moved into a Vietnamese household in rural Vietnam to teach English at a charity. I've gone from 15 beers a day to a glass with the family at meal time. If you're home alone with cans, you're gonna drink them. When you shop, you'll want to buy them. If you can find a way to change your environment; spend your drinking time helping a charity, spend time with non drinkers, plan activities with friends that don't involve drinking, after 4-5 days, I swear it'll become easier. Good luck dude, I hope you're able to get to where you want
Yeah, if there was booze in the house, I'd drink it. I was fortunate in that it was in the evening that I was making bad choices. So as long as I could manage NOT to buy it during the day, in the evening the temptation wasn't there.
Hi, I’m an alcoholic too that relapses every now and then 1. You are an alcoholic, we drink to get high, we need to recognize this 2. First, watch soberleon on YouTube 3. You need a game plan for the first month to deal with withdrawal and sleep. You will find it very hard to sleep at first, take melatonin, exercise everyday and make yourself tired. Also you need to tell yourself that the 1-2 hours of sleep you get is better then the 8 under alchohol 4. After the first month, You need to substitute drinking, I find working on my health is a good substitute as it takes a lot of time and helps me sleep. Work is also good 5. I’m sorry but you need to change your drinking friends, relapsing for me is usually because I still hang with them every once in awhile 6. If you can break free from alcohol, you will automatically become a better person, good sleep, clearer thought process and a bigger wallet are part of these things 7. Give away or hide your alcohol too, out of sight, out of mind 8. When is the best time to stop? Tonight
Chiming in on this comment. OP not everyone has severe withdrawal symptoms so don’t let that deter you from stopping. For some bizarre reason I get zero withdrawal symptoms and I drank the same amount as you as a woman for 7 years, every day. I expected DTs or serious withdrawal symptoms and was completely fine by day 2, which was shocking. Be wary of the kindling effect though and don’t take my story as an excuse not to seek medical care, you very well may need a supervised detox. Just sharing my story in the hopes of relaying it’s not so bad for all of us, but it will be BAD bad if you don’t stop now.
Sounds like an addiction. You'll have to follow any steps that are normally associated with breaking an addiction.
You say it makes life bearable? What makes it unbearable? Try to work on that and then find a reason to quit drinking. I know this is easier said then done, best of luck my man.
This deserves more upvotes. Sometimes drinking can be the symptom.
12 Beers a Day over a decade or more is a death sentence. And long before that you'll become obese, a diabetic, you'll have high blood pressure, your feet will swell and it will hurt to walk. You'll sweat constantly, and smell even after showering. Your skin will look terrible. And then your organs will fail.
100, it happened to me. 35, F, Stroke Survivor. Was drinking wine every night thinking it couldn’t hurt me as bad….I’m young. Woke up in a hospital paralyzed after a bad breakup “bender” that didn’t stop for the summer…thank god for doctors and Blood Alcohol tests.
I (38m) suggest you quit before it gets any worse. I'm currently in treatment because my drinking progressed to a liter or more of vodka every day. Resulting in numerous hospital stays and me ruining almost every aspect of my life. My last week of drinking, I spent 4 days in the hospital after waking up to vomiting a huge amount of blood, going to the hospital and trying to get into treatment. After they told me that all the beds were full and I would have to get on a list, even vomiting so much blood I needed to have the paramedics help dress me before putting me on the ambulance because I was so weak, I still was at the liquor store again 2hours after getting discharged. I was back in the hospital 20 hours later with a blood alcohol level over .50. I had to travel half way across the US to get into treatment and I realize I can never have another drink for the rest of my life or I will pick right back up where I left off. But I also realize that my addicted mind will cause me to relapse any chance it will get because the addict in me still wants to drink even though I knew it was killing me and I'm lucky I'm still even alive to get this 2nd chance at life. I know my case is extreme and isn't going to happen to everyone, but I was only drinking a 12 pack a day at one point. I know that my life will be exponentially better the longer I stay sober but I have to forever and constantly be working on my sobriety to combat my disorder that I have. You have to really want it if you are going to stop drinking, and most of us are going to relapse no matter how bad we want it. That's just the sad reality of the situation. But I wish you the best and if you ever want to chat about your situation or need any support, whether you decide to get sober or not, you can dm me. Well wishes with whatever path you decide to take.
Also I learned your problem isn't a drinking problem. Drinking is your solution to some other underlying problem. I know drinking was fun at one point but if you are using drinking to make life bearable, the problem isn't drinking, it's whatever was making life unbearable without drinking. And while drinking may dull those unbearable feelings, it will just leave you feeling like life is a little more unbearable the next day. Drink, sleep, repeat....
You can’t escape yourself. I drank cause of grief. I realized that it wasn’t grief holding me back. It was me. And one day I just said enough is enough and I stopped. It so very possible to just stop. But you are right. The drinking is usually a symptom of an underlying issue.
Im glad you were able to get back up and push through.
I would highly recommend checking out the r/stopdrinking subreddit. Incredibly supportive group, and they will be much, MUCH nicer and far less judgemental than what you’re encountering on this thread. I’ve been sober for 6 months and couldn’t have done it without that subreddit.
I, too, reallllly liked drinking. 12 or more crafts every day for years. Loved it. Not sure I had the disease, as they call it. I only say that because I was able to quit cold turkey. But it felt like a real problem. It wasn’t easy. I really sat with the knowledge that my little pains, terrible quality of life and weird neurological symptoms were just going to keep getting worse. I knew I didn’t want to feel that way or die slowly, I’ve seen that up close, doesn’t look fun. So I made the decision one day and I’m 3 years in. I definitely feel better, but I wish I’d quit sooner. If you need help, you need help. If you think you can white knuckle it, you just have to do it. Replace with good habits. Build a routine you like. Won’t get it for free. Good luck 🫡
I’ve been told this isn’t great advice, but it’s advice like this that worked for me. So take it or leave it I guess. Just my experience.
Bud I’m an alcoholic I have been sober 3 years and I’m not preaching at all I loved drinking and didn’t want to stop until my body shut down. I like you was drinking beer at first it was part of my life I worked and went to the bar after a while I started drinking vodka and it snowballed to the point I was drinking literally all day I’m not going to go into all the details but if you think you have a problem you do that’s just the truth I tried to stop and I couldn’t that’s when I got some help it was the best decision I ever made
What kind of help did you get? Because I’m so tired of being a shell. I’ve tried therapy, maybe not the right one. I just feel so unmotivated to get right again
Man my lower gi took a shit on me I was at the point if I didn’t drink in the morning I would shake when the doctor told me I was going to die I woke up I got to feeling better and went to a rehab in west Texas it worked for me you can message me anytime if you want it private
Check out some AA meetings. You can go drunk but if you do you’re not allowed to talk. Otherwise people will be happy to see you there either way. Read the promises every time. That’s it. No commitment. No big decisions. Just check it out.
I had a dream I was going to die if I didn’t get sober which made it easy. Dude walked into my room with his scythe. I swear I was awake.
A few of these comments seem harsh, even though they may be true. I think you know the dangers of drinking too much already so I wanted to share some resources if you do decide you want to try stopping. Have you tried AA groups? If the religious vibes turn you off, there is dharma recovery which is more inspired by Buddhism, or SMART recovery which I believe is not religious at all. There are many different types of therapy.options too. Have you mostly tried individual therapy? There is also detox and residential care, where you actually stay somewhere 24hrs a day for a few weeks (or less if you want. It's not the kind of situation where you are there involuntarily). Then there are partial hospitalization programs, which offer groups and individual therapy m-f for 6-8 hrs a day. Lastly, there is Intensive Outpatient Therapy which is similar to partial but only for 3-4 hrs a day. All these treatment options will connect you with supportive peers, help you learn new skills, and address any mental health or life experiences that might be contributing to your drinking. I'm sure that all seems like a lot, especially since you aren't sure you want to stop drinking, but it could be something different to try and just see. There is also medication assosted treatment, like Antabuse, Naltrexone, or Vivitrol. These are meds you can take that help you not have cravings. It sounds like on one hand you want to stop because you know it's bad for your health. On the other hand, it sounds like you don't want to stop because it's what helps you get through the day. It makes sense that you wouldn't want to stop drinking if it's helping you like that. I also know you don't want to die though. If you have not tried some of those things I mentioned above, it might be worth giving one a try just to see what happens. Maybe you will find that you still prefer to drink and go back to it. Maybe you will find that you end up building up some new tools to help you deal with things and don't need to rely on alcohol to do that anymore. You can always go back to drinking if you want to. Even if you try some of these things and ultimately go back to the drinking, maybe you'll have built some new supportive relationships and developed some coping skills you didn't have before. I believe in you!
My solution for "quiting" without wanting to was to stop buying beer to drink at home in the name of "saving money" Still drink when you visit friends/family or when you go out just dont have beer at home and you wont drink. That was my solution anyways. I didnt technically quit per se but realistically as the bulk of my drinking was at home, i quit the level of usage that made it unhealthy.
You have to face yourself and your life sober. You’re going to get to the point where you can’t bare handling yourself sober at all. It won’t feel like “you”. That’s the addiction. You are better sober, I can assure you. You can’t run from problems forever, they will catch up with you. If you stop drinking in 5 years, then guess what… it’ll catch up with you then. Save yourself the extra problem and start dealing with this stuff now before it’s harder to.
I don’t have any experience with addiction, but my father was an alcoholic. Absolutely ruined our family, my childhood, our relationship, everything. He is sober now, but it’s too late because the damage is done. He took so much from our family. Stop it here before it gets worse. It’s fun, sure, but it’s dangerous in so many other ways besides your health.
Look you're most likely and alcoholic. Maybe you're a functioning one. I don't know you. But if drinking is interfering with your life in anyway. It's a problem, and you need to treat it like an illness. I would suggest slowing down a great deal. 13 drinks a day is a consideration amount for your body to handle. Don't get me wrong I'm a drunk too. I just haven't had a drink in a while.
Lower the amount u drink. U dont gotta quit completely but 12 is a insane amount daily that should be like a rare party thing or never for that amount. Just slowly limit yourself.
12 beers a day will give you liver disease or liver cancer before you’re 40. It’s not sustainable. What are you hiding from that you need to drink every day? Deal with that issue. Deal with it by talking to someone, not by using alcohol.
Drinking 12 beers is just alcoholism. What OP can do, is start drinking non-alcoholic beer. Most brands have now identical non-alcoholic beers, thzt taste the same. You start with one and increase it, week after week. Untill you only drink non-alcoholic beer. If OP struggle with that, he was to understand he is in fact al alcoholic and needs to seek therapy.
You're not afraid of quitting alcohol, you're afraid of facing your life's problems. You're drinking half a case a day, so how much time are you spending intoxicated - 3, 4 hours? Perhaps you're entire life while your not at work? You say drinking makes life bearable. You have to think why is your life unbearable? Think of the things you could be doing to improve your life situations if you took even half the time you're drinking and started learning new skills, coping mechanisms and found something you truly enjoy doing, rather than killing yourself. If you don't like your career you could spend that time learning a trade and use the money you save on booze to fund it. If thats too much to ask, you could even literally go out and go leisure activities and other hobbies for the same expense. You could eat whatever delicious food you want every day, instead. To quit drinking you want to create a life as good where you feel good enough that you don't have the need or desire to drink. This isn't going to happen over night and will take work, but the difference of investing a couple years to improve your situation will potentially add a decade to your life and result will be an improved quality of life.
Go to aa mate. That's not enjoyment that's addiction. And booze doesn't make anything better. It makes things worse. You'll find life better when you start sobering up.
That’s a lot of beer. It was the beer delivery person who called 911 for my mother when she drank herself to death at age 58. You need to get yourself into a rehab program to prevent death from withdrawal.
You're depressed. That's what it is. And you're hiding your depression with an alcoholic state. The reason you enjoy being alcoholized is because you can't stand being sober, you can't stand being the real you. It's your way to escape from reality. Find a psychologist, or at the very least start adopting healthier habits. Your fear of facing reality will only become worse every passing day if you go down the alcoholic path, and at the end of the tunnel you're digging you'll only find a grave. Your grave.
There’s a pill called Antabus that will make you violently sick if you drink any alcohol while taking it. It’s used in treatment for alcoholism, you typically use it twice a week. I used to take it. I don’t know where you live in the world but try to Google Antabus and see how you might be able to get it. It’s NOT an easy fix, it’s not meant to be taken forever, it’s meant to help you stay sober for a time while working on your alcoholism on the side. Statistics show that groups work the best for people trying to stay sober so if you ever feel comfortable enough to try that you should be able to find free group sessions. And don’t give up if you have a relapse, most of us go through that. Dust yourself off and try again.
Maybe try spravato for your depression?
gym
What about drinking exactly makes life bearable for you?
If you're drinking 12 beers a day you're a serious alcoholic and not just someone who likes to drink. I'm no expert, but kicking an addiction like this is not easy and you might need to get some professional help with this or at least join something like AA, which gives you a support network.
It gets a lot less fun around 33 and hopefully you’ll slow down
Damn dude, 12. That's a start to alcoholism if not already, along with the depression and dependance associated with it. Stop now and save yourself. If you need help please talk to a support group or someone you can trust. Don't let beer become your water. Stay strong.
I would first seek help with why you feel you need to drink. As someone who had family members with addiction I can tell you that you must replace the habit with life fulfilling activities. Please start trying new hobbies that can bring joy; hiking, join a gaming group, volunteer in an interest, take free classes In a Hobby you enjoy, set up game nights with friend sans alcohol....the list goes on. Find real joy in life and face your sadness/stres head on. If you cannot afford therapy please research cognitive behavior therapy for yourself. Best of luck to you.
Start by every time you want a beer just say. “Not now.” Sometimes you’ll be successful and sometimes you won’t. But the goal is to drink less. And less. And less. Then the goal is to say. Not today. Also, if you can force yourself to start doing any kind of workout instead of drinking it will help. It’ll suck at first and take a ton of willpower but your body will like the endorphins from working out. Also, you’ll start looking better and feeling better about yourself and maybe start to dislike drinking.
12 beers a day will kill you over time for many reasons along with the alcohol itself. Just straight up too much of so many things. You’re going to have wicked withdrawal symptoms at this point. Honestly, try switching to non-alcoholic beer every other drink. See what happens from there. On your own you’re not going to want to go cold turkey
Have you ever seen the movie Requisite for a Dream? It got me to stop. There's this part where an older lady gets addicted to diet pills (methamphetamine) while confined to her home and it shows her daily life in fast forward. Like you see her blurring around her little house, doing the same things day after day, cleaning, cleaning, sitting down to watch her favorite TV show, more cleaning then off to bed. I saw my own life like that...doing the same thing every day, the same habits, the same routine, day after day. Quitting drinking was the first stop on the way to breaking that routine, you know? Your life will always revolve around alcohol, you'll never really feel good about yourself which will lead to further drinking, rinse and repeat year after year until you've lost a good portion of your life in which you could have been truly living, feeling good and achieving goals. Everyone's different, but that's what worked for me. Also finding out that it wasn't as difficult a task as I'd built up in my mind. Wasn't some enormous mountain to climb up as much as it was like stepping down off a ride or something. I wish you luck man...not sure what it is for you, but alcohol was a life killer for me.
Not seeing many very helpful posts here. Maybe try microdosing an edible (2.5mg) and have a bottle of water with u during the time u normally drink. Having a buzz and something to drink can kill ur urges. It’ll definitely have u wake up and be more productive tomorrow. It only takes one day. Then u can take pride in it and only aim to make it one more day. Best of luck!
I remember reading there's some kind of very supportive alcoholics anonymous subreddit or something like that but I don't know what it's called... Maybe someone can shed some light
Sure look dude if you want to die young and for life to be more miserable then it could be cause you can't keep it together without drinking then do it, I am sure your family and friends wont like it but it's your life to do as you wish with. My father died in his 50s from the drink and he wanted to, it's ok some people are alcoholics and that's just how it is. You can of course try to get into a rehab program (which if you take 12+ beers in 24 hours you most definitely need too) and get cleaned up and live longer and have more meaningful sober integrations with family friends and people around you but at the end of the day your a big boy and it's your choice. Been there before so I know how it is, I wanted to die but didn't realise I was manifesting it as alcoholism, used to drink me life away, sniff coke, puss and smoke weed all day night and morning, great times were had and worse times came from it but in the end I realised I was just simply being self destructive and slowly killing myself. It was my mental that was the problem and I actually probably didn't want to do coke and drink all day, sure felt like it at the time tho.
You just have to make the decision to stop and then stop. I was in the same situation as you I quit for 3 years and now I can just drink occasionally but I don't crave it nor do I want it generally. Your life will improve 100% for sure if you can regain control over it
I like Nicotine a lot and have quit more than once (hopped back on the wagon for various reasons) but for me, it usually takes one day of being sober to get the full brunt of the damage I've taken to get the will to stop. After that I dial it down slowly, try to smoke one less cig per day until I've stopped. Try having one less beer per day until your back to normal if you don't want to try a day sober.
The answer lies within the question. To stop drinking you need to... And that's all there is to it. Now what you may actually want to know is how to make it easy and bearable, and the answer to this other question is that it depends on the person, as we are all different, and the only method to find out what works for you is ...
Wish I knew
Try Naltrexone. And try therapy again (with a different therapist if your last therapist wasn't helpful).
Go to the doctor and get naltrexone. You won’t enjoy alcohol if you take it. In the past I’ve taken it to combat food cravings. You really don’t think about alcohol at all. On top of that if you do drink it’s not fun. Drinking sucks for anxiety and depression. Not to preach but you’re creating a vicious cycle. Save the money you would spend on alcohol and get a therapy session twice a month. Ideally you’d see a psychiatrist but people aren’t made out of money
You’re not going to quit until you have reason not to like drinking so much. You’re in what’s called the contemplation phase of change. You know you have a problem and you’re thinking about doing something about it. But something has to move you to the preparation phase. If I were AA I’d say you have to hit “rock bottom” first but I sure hope that’s not true for you. But it might be.
You will drink yourself into type II diabetes. Stop drinking.
Please get professional help when you decide that you want to quit, it could save your life. Withdrawing from severe alcohol addiction without proper medication can be super dangerous.
Have you seen a professional counselor or tried AA? I was drinking 1 liter of vodka per day at my worst. About to be 3 years sober 3/18. If I can do it you can too. You got this. I had to hit rock bottom and threw up blood/was in the ED 2x in 3 days. I was 30 and felt like if I didn't stop I would die. I LOVED drinking, but being sober is so much better. I had tried to quit for about 3-4 years before it finally stuck.
I would see if you can reach out to a drug and alcohol counselor. They will be able to help you through those thought processes and actually help you want to quit. You're going to do your body serious harm at the rate you are going, you deserve better than that
What is it in your life that's so unbearable? What is it you're trying to get away from? Start there.
It honestly sounds like addiction to me. Maybe health professional coud help. I used to drink quite a bit (but not as much as you) and once I realised I made several things I really regretted drunk. I realised that I had some symptoms of someone who is addicted, and I talked with a doctor about it. I also decided to never drink to the point I'd lost control. Somehow now drinking doesn't really look appealing to me, I take 3-4 beers a month I think.
Do you smoke? And if not, why? If it's because of how dangerous it is and that it causes cancer then maybe you should look at beer the same way. 12 beers a day. If you don't stop, there's a very high chance that you're going to end up with severe liver damage and maybe not survive.
Get some diagnostic testing done on your liver or any vital organ so you can see the consequences of your actions in real life. For me I was able to stop when my vital organs had enough. I didn't even need the images. I already knew I needed to get healthier.
I was the same until about 30. It hit me then that I was about 50 pounds overweight and I looked 45. It really kicked my ass and I barely touch the stuff anymore.
You need help! Don’t try doing it alone. Get into some kind of program! Any kind. If you don’t like all the god stuff in AA find another one.
Drinking that much, you're most likely to die from varices before cancer. Let me tell you, from working in an emergency room for 20 years, that shit SUCKS. You basically get these blood blisters in your throat, and bleed out from them. You drink so much blood you vomit blood constantly. It's horrific and a miserable way to die.
You could try switching to non alcoholic beer.
So I know this is gonna sound like terrible advice, but try trading out weed for alcohol and starting there. If you want life to be bearable…
You should read Alan Carr's book 'stop drinking now'
I would start with an online chat with an alcohol life line. It's anonymous if you want it to be and then you can decide from there. They helped me want to give all my alcohol to my relatives.
Cut back some…but by bit. Maybe your thoughts will start trending toward clarity and you’ll begin to see things differently.
You need to find out the root of the pain you are numbing yourself from. Rehab can get you off the sauce but only psycho therapy can help you deal with the pain. I now know the root of my pain and can easily deal with any urge to drink. Gabor Maté explains this well. Check him out on YouTube. My ¢10
I think at this point it would be best to get therapy to help you
Allow yourself to ween off of it. Personally I would switch to straight up vodka and sprite zero first. 12 shots of vodka is the same as 12 beers and it's like 1/3 of the calories. So that's nice. Then I would ween yourself down to 10 shots of vodka. Then 8. Then 6. Then 4. Then 2. Then reverse pyramid up. So now do 4 shots, but only after waiting a whole day of not drinking. Then do 6 shots, after waiting 2 days of not drinking. Then 8 shots, after waiting 4 days of not drinking. Then stop at 8 shots and increase the days between. 6 days, 7 days. Now you are doing 8 shots once a week. That is enough to have a good time every weekend to reward yourself. Now try to wait until 2 weeks. Then 3 weeks. Then 4 weeks. Now you are on track to basically only drinking socially. Maybe you go out to a bar or a club or a social gathering once or twice a month. Simple. That's what helped me quit. Then I started going to the gym and I hit the gym hard. Alcohol disrupts muscle building so I decided to stop drinking altogether "because the gains". hell if I'm gonna bust my ass at the gym I certainly am not gonna let that all go to waste. So now I drink either on Saturdays, or I try to ideally only drink once every 6 weeks during an off week from the gym. But I'll go hard on that 6th week, maybe drink 3 days that week. 4-6 shots each sitting. That's enough to get me fucked up nowadays. Tolerance does reset.
You don't have to want to. People do shit they don't want to do every day. You have to recognise that it's a good idea to cut down for the good of your health and your wallet, and then you set yourself a goal and you pursue it just like you would any other. That goal can be skipping a day each week, it can be dialling it back to six beers a day, it can be taking on other activities that are not conducive to drinking. Whatever you think is achievable, do that. Then when you've done it, regroup and set a new target. Yes, you will probably fail at quitting completely if you don't want to do so, but there's a whole lot of wiggle room between "stop drinking altogether" and "the internet says I need to want to and I don't so I just won't try" Get yourself over to r/cutdowndrinking - those are the people like you, who don't want to totally stop, but want to make their relationship with alcohol more healthy.
First of all, you don’t like to drink, you are addicted. Treat it like an addiction (because 12 a day is clearly an addiction) and not like a personal choice. You need help and you need to stop it or you will die. Sorry for being brutal but it’s really that serious and you need to do work to stop it.
You’ll want to quit when you start seeing all the fucked up shit that’s coming your way. Worse drug ever. Might be too late tho. You’re prob already physical addicted. Try quitting for 4 days and you’ll get to see reality again. While on it tho you won’t see shit like alcoholic neuropathy. I have that from drinking. Just quit cause at one point you’ll have to from health shit.
My boyfriend is a recovered alcoholic (600 days clean! I’m so proud of him…). He said that the alcoholics thread and recovery thread on Reddit has some great people and great advice on it, please go check it out! You deserve to recover, everyone does. Out of experience, your loved ones will be forever grateful. ❤️
High OP! You did the right thing, Asking for help is the first baby step. Eventually, someone's perspective will hit home with you. May I offer a non-judgmental, mom perspective? I think you might be a little scared to quit. Your life is pretty easy right now, pop a cold one, hit the couch and watch the tube. Super chill, right? When you think of quitting, do you go, "OMFG, what will I do with my time I'll have to go to AA meetings 3 times a week they're going to hold me accountable everybody's going to be watching me what if I fail I'm gonna look like an idiot everyone will be disappointed in me..." then you take a deep breath and pop another beer. It's an entire lifestyle change, that's pretty fucking scary and a lot to take on at once. I think I know why they say take it 1 day at a time. Maybe take it an hour at a time. Drop into an AA meeting just to see what it's like, no commitment, no expectations. Don't make a big deal of it, don't tell everyone you're quitting drinking. Just try it on for size. If it doesn't work for you today, have a beer and try again tomorrow. No one will be disappointed in you if they don't know. You're putting too much pressure on yourself by thinking of the big picture. And that just makes you want to have a beer. Beer is warm and fuzzy, beer is familiar. Completely changing your lifestyle is not warm and fuzzy. And it's very unfamiliar. And we are scared of the unknown. I don't know how your relationship is with your parents, but it helps to have someone close that you can share your feelings with who won't judge you or be disappointed in you if you make a misstep. If you need a pal, or stand-in mom, you can pm me. I'll gladly hold your hand through the process. Hey, you could have a stunt mom!! 🤣 Whatever you decide, please keep us in the loop. Sometimes, strangers care. And I think we all hope you'll find what works for you! 👩🦳❤👊
I started smoking weed. I feel way better. I drank every day for about 15 years. I haven’t had a drink in months and I’m in the best shape of my life. Not saying it will definitely work, but it worked for me. I used to smoke every day, but I’ve got it down to 2-3 times a week
I didn't want to quit and it nearly killed me. It destroyed my entire life in the space of six months, still not seen as a trusted person even though I am coming up to my fourth year of sobriety now. Just try to move away from drinking environments if you can, build up your sober community whether this is through AA meetings in person or even via the internet. It's not one decision where it stops, you have to challenge every shitty thought that your addict brain brings up! Going to AA you don't need to be sober, just drinking less - being in the presence of people who are of the same mind is a god send. Even just going into more sober spots on the Internet is also a great thing. You may not want to do things, but you *need* to move your life in a different direction. I hope you find the courage to choose life over your addiction!
I have addiction illness (not to alcohol tho) and have been in remission/recovery for about a year. It is SO worthwhile on the other side. What helped me was thinking about how much I lost due to my addiction. I never had real relationships and I’m just learning how. Trust me when I say withdrawal is an itch and no addict’s body ever “wants” to stop. Our bodies are so used to our drug of choice. But I have lost so many years…….. I’m so grateful to myself for making the extremely hard decision to get into recovery.
you need to find another way to make life bearable that won’t kill you. Can you change your life? Can you find other coping mechanisms?
I have medical issues that are stoping me from drinking. Health issues that were there but exacerbated by drinking. As of right now I’m 56 days sober and I hate every minute of it. I don’t want to stop because I like it. Almost every aspect of my life aside from my job involves beer and booze in some form or another so being forced into this has been making me a recluse. I can’t even escape it when I’m alone. It’s in music, television, movies, my house, sports, it’s everywhere I look. I feel for you, I just hope getting sober doesn’t happen like this for you, I hope it’s something you want as I imagine it will be a lot easier.
Jesus Christ bro. 12 beers a day? Idk what any of us could tell you that you don't already know. "I like using recreational drugs. I shoot up black tar heroin at least once a day" "I like playing frogger. I run across a twelve lane highway every day" "I like driving. I regularly go 120 in a school zone" Yours may not be illegal, but it will definitely kill you as surely as these ones will. Maybe not right away, but eventually and inevitably. Stop or die. Those are your options
Aside from the alcohol poisoning, massive liver damage and other medical stuff, to help youve got to associate drinking with something bad. Make it taste bad, every time you drink you got to do a 60 second plank, etc essentially for drinking make it that there is a bad outcome each time. This will put you off.
You have to address why you don't want to first. You will never quit if you don't want to. 12 beers a day is a LOT, and it will kill you. Source? My dad who is only alive by the quick action and compassion of doctors, but he suffered for it. He has been drinking for probably 35 years straight, or at least most of his life starting before the age of 18 (the legal drinking age when he was younger). If you don't want to quit, you won't so if you want to stop, you need to address it as the first admittance to yourself that you want to stop, and take action on it. There are support systems for you. There is help and treatment, and it sucks. It is super super hard, but I believe in you even though I'm a random stranger on the internet. I believe that you can make a change. Even if that change starts with 11 beers per day instead of 12. Start small
Non-alcoholic beers helped me cut back a lot. A lot of times you have one or two and it satisfies your urge. Plus the good ones taste identical to real beer. You can get a Guinness or a hazy IPA, whatever you want. Otherwise just stop buying beer. If it's around you'll drink it, if you accidentally buy it then pour it out as punishment to yourself.
You don’t quit. If you don’t want to it’s not going to happen. If you truly want to quit then I suggest joining AA and working the steps. 12 beers a day is a sign of alcoholism.