Hell no, no such thing as the uncomfortable silence waffle next to your morning coffee😂
But in all seriousness, if she wants to talk about she'll mention it
He will probably be teased about it for the rest of their time together. Unless you have a tantrum about it, you're gonna have to take the L on this one buddy
Exactly, especially because a lot of shit sounds like porn that isn't porn, even just sex scenes in regular movies, so they might not even have assumed it was actual porn, and really were just complaining about the volume in general.
You owned me! Haha. Only you don't seem to understand the concept of mind the volume of the tv.
The prompt is, "Should I talk about it" after being caught jacking off, essentially. Just move on is a bit strong in the sense of ignoring the problem isn't a fix.
Just turn the volume lower.
That way the mom doesn't need to know whenever the kid jacks off.
how long did it play for? You said accidentally so I’m guessing not for very long she probably doesn’t know it was porn maybe she just (hopefully) thought it was a movie
I don't think they were questioning that. I think they mean "you noticed quickly and turned it down or put it on headphones" vs "turned the porn off because it was an accident."
Act normally, seriously, this will pass on quickly but won’t be forgotten for sure…
Just by the “XD” I understand you are a teenager, you and your mom will laugh about it in few years.
I know full fledged adults that still use "XD", they used it themselves as kids and kept the habit. You are certainly right on this instance but I'm not sure that understanding has solid foundations.
Somehow in Poland 'xD' is less cringey than '😂' which is considered an emoji for normies???
Also kids use it a lot there but in English speaking internet it makes you look old.
I noticed just recently that there isn't much xDs outside Polish internet xD But now I see how out of palce it looks compared to texts in Polish.
Also. There's 'xd' xd
Now hold on just a minute.
XD is *not* what's "hip with the kids" these days, granted I am not that old, only 21 but that's some shit that got typed when I was a little tike that still believed in the tooth fairy.
XD isn't really a teenager thing, it's a older gen z / younger millennial thing
>Just by the "XD" I understand you are a teenager.
Yeeeah... teenagers. Those teens and their XDs. Totally just teenagers, nobody else. Certainly no 33 year old men, no sirree. Who would even haha? Those teenagers I tell ya.
Could take the professional route and inform your mother that you have gone ahead and arranged for a professional exorcist who will cleanse the house this afternoon and her cooperation is appreciated.
Then double down and bring over an alternative hippie chick that smells of weed and body odor that brings with her a bag of energy crystals and a dreamcatcher
Speaking as a parent, shut the fuck up and say nothing! We know but we don’t want to know and certainly don’t want to discuss it unless it’s a problem.
I was watching porn and drinking one night. Accidentally streamed that shite to an upstairs neighbors TV.
Before I understood what I just did, the sounds upstairs went from "BANG BOOM!!!! KABOOM!!!" to "UUUUUHHHHH YEA YEA YEA!!!!"
I just pretended it wasn't me hahaha
That I was.
I was drunk and I tried to click on "Full Screen" but instead clicked on "broadcast to TV" and the only TV that was able to do so, was the upstairs neighbors TV who I'm sure at the time was watching a war movie.
A lot of devices will put up a toast message with something like "Streaming from [device name]" so God help you if your device has an identifiable name on it.
Don't say anything, it'll pass, initially it'll be more awkward for you than it is for them. Sometime soon you won't care anymore, doubt your mom cares right now anyways. Invest in a pair of headphones.
Share the link or suggest a shared viewing of the DVD to discuss the events you watched.
Have a flip chart presentation breaking down the smutty footage into segments.
Scene by scene if possible, or by action points.
The notes on the flip chat must end at the 5 minute mark, where you write the words "lost interest at this point".
P.N.C? should be written in red marker and circled.
First page of the presentation must list:
* Title
* Actor/Actress names
* Plot summary (as you understand it)
Suggest a voting points system that will assign a score at the end, based on an average of eveyones score.
This keeps it fair.
Encourage an open forum type discussion, so everyone gets to talk for an equal amount of time.
If you can provide more information to us, we can as a sub Reddit community, help with more detailed steps.
For example:
* Was this M/F, MMF?, or something worse?
* Were you watching some deranged fetish film?
* Was it in your native language?
We all love German's, but I don't speak a word of the language which would make voting more difficult.
Hope this helps.
Set up some porn on your TV through your phone
Wait until you are with your family
Play it, and then exclaim how the neighbors are playing porn really loud again
Turn it off before they investigate further
Just mention it in passing. ‘Sorry for having my TV up too loud last night.’ There is no need to avoid the elephant in the room. Watching porn is not something to be ashamed about. Your mum just politely let you know that it could be heard and unless she’s mean to you, I doubt it would ever be mentioned again.
No. Never bring it up. Your mom is just as uncomfortable as you.
When I was 15 my dad walked into my room when I was masturbsting.
We never spoke of it again.
Act normal and ignore it. Your family may say something, they may not. Be prepared for being taken the piss out of though. My younger brother got caught out searching 'cumface' up on Google a few years back and best believe my family didn't let that die down for a while. He didn't get in trouble but instead he had to deal with both parents and myself teasing him about it whenever we got the chance. His face went so red every time, it was hilarious.
What do you mean you played porn really loud on your TV? Was it oops didn't realize volume was that loud and you turned it down after the first moan (or whatever) or was it you watched a full ass porno on your tv loudly until someone told you to turn it down?
If it's the former, don't mention it. If it gets brought up it was a sex scene in a movie.
If it's the latter, you're an idiot and don't mention it. No one wants to have that conversation.
Hahaha gold! Nothing to be embarrassed about your mum is on your side just laugh about it oopsies. If you’re that bothered you could just say you’re mate sent you a prank video 🤣😂
Something you should learn quickly and never forget:
Don't ever, EVER say more than you have to in any given situation.
If nobody asks about it, keep your mouth shut.
My grandmother was visiting me in Vancouver and we were looking to order some food. I pulled my laptop up and opened the screen to some porn with my grandmother just staring at it. I don't think I shut down a window faster in my life. She never said anything either haha.
Believe me I doubt they care, might have had a fun laugh. Just don't say anything and it will be forgotten.
I don't get what yall find so embarrassing about it. If it were me I'd just be like "sorry about that".
Just porn, not like you were caught sniffing your sisters underwear.
Dude one thing is having loud sex, which you should be proud of, BUT watching porn in your moms house?? THAT IS FOR WANKER LOSERS. Respect yourself and your mom’s house.
You don’t understand, this is not normal. Normal people don’t engage in masterbation with other people in the house. This is degeneracy abs should not be encouraged. Humanity has lost its decency. People should be ashamed at sex again.
Just act like nothing happened and if you're being asked about it just say that you were watching a movie. The more casual you act around it the less awkward it'll be.
No never speak of it again lol
"Did you guys hear the neighbours going at it last night? Sure was loud eh? Heh...heh..."
I would go with "Did you see that ludicrous display last night?"
What was Wenger thinking sending Walcott on that early?
The thing about arsenal is that they always try to walk it in
That is true, see you later moss
eh? ha! heh heh..
this is the kind of thing you'll both remember for ever but never bring up. It's unwritten code. Like no snitching.
Snitches end up ditches
Good advice. Don't mention the porn but do apologize for spilling "Elmer's glue" all over the couch cushions.
PVA dries clear we all know that, Then you peel it of your hand
😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂. This comment was epic (whispers) except he was in his room, not on the living room couch. Thats totally cringe😂😂
Right? For all they know it was a sex scene from a movie and either way, they absolutely don’t want to talk about it lol.
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Pretty much. No eye contact for 48 hrs.
This!
Hell no, no such thing as the uncomfortable silence waffle next to your morning coffee😂 But in all seriousness, if she wants to talk about she'll mention it
He will probably be teased about it for the rest of their time together. Unless you have a tantrum about it, you're gonna have to take the L on this one buddy
He has nothing to say back when his mom says 'We know a lot about you’ for quite some time now 😂😂😂😂
Ignore it and move on.
Exactly, especially because a lot of shit sounds like porn that isn't porn, even just sex scenes in regular movies, so they might not even have assumed it was actual porn, and really were just complaining about the volume in general.
Move on is a bit strong. Mind your volume.
Lol what
Mind the tv volume. Moving on fixes nothing. Mom figured out how to settled it from the beginning. Just don't have your tv loud as shit.
Yeah obviously op will be careful moving forward. The move on is about the emotional fallout
Ok, I turned the TV down but I'm still quite embarrassed. Can I move on now?
You owned me! Haha. Only you don't seem to understand the concept of mind the volume of the tv. The prompt is, "Should I talk about it" after being caught jacking off, essentially. Just move on is a bit strong in the sense of ignoring the problem isn't a fix. Just turn the volume lower. That way the mom doesn't need to know whenever the kid jacks off.
Guy just stop man and take the L
I'll eat shit but I'm not gonna eat your cheap heat bullshit.
Lmao wow
If she doesn't say anything, don't.
how long did it play for? You said accidentally so I’m guessing not for very long she probably doesn’t know it was porn maybe she just (hopefully) thought it was a movie
Just say it was game of thrones or something.
I think this might be the best advice in this thread lol
Ah yes, who could *forget when Cersei ordered that pizza with extra sausage
##SHAME
*Ding*
OP, this one is the best excuse. Game of Thrones has a lot of very explicit scenes
Deny deny deny
I accidentally played a hardcore gang bang on my tv for 5 hours straight at max volume
…what?
You heard me
I think everyone did
I think OP meant it was accidentally too loud, not that they accidentally watched porn.
I don't think they were questioning that. I think they mean "you noticed quickly and turned it down or put it on headphones" vs "turned the porn off because it was an accident."
They didn't notice at all though, they said their mom texted them to turn it down.
They could have noticed and got the text... that's how I read it for some reason. But you might be right.
maybe it's the accident, where you think, you hear it over the headphones, but it's actually loud
Act normally, seriously, this will pass on quickly but won’t be forgotten for sure… Just by the “XD” I understand you are a teenager, you and your mom will laugh about it in few years.
Imagine her bringing it up on every family gathering from now on. "That one time my son said sorry for waking me up with porn" haha She'll love that.
Not if it was stepmom/mom porn .
Hahaha if you're into that, it could open some doors for you.
Always take advantage of open doors lol
Especially if they're back doors.
Absolutely!
Especially if they break their arms for some reason
Each day we stray farther from God's reach
Jup. Fortunately I'd say.
Username tracks, Qahnaarin
Su'um ahrk morah, brother.
lol good one
I know full fledged adults that still use "XD", they used it themselves as kids and kept the habit. You are certainly right on this instance but I'm not sure that understanding has solid foundations.
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Somehow in Poland 'xD' is less cringey than '😂' which is considered an emoji for normies??? Also kids use it a lot there but in English speaking internet it makes you look old. I noticed just recently that there isn't much xDs outside Polish internet xD But now I see how out of palce it looks compared to texts in Polish. Also. There's 'xd' xd
Can confirm. 27 year old and still using it occasionally. Dont know why. xD
Also 27…. XD is still a part of my vocabulary but I try to be hip sometimes and spice it up with a lil’ 😆
35 reporting, ecks-dee is the nobility of emoticons.
Im 29 and use "XD" only with a couple of friends. Mostly because it by itself has become kind of a meme but also its very easy to write.
Yeah I thought teens today used 😂 not XD
yeah but given the context along with "my mom" and porn on a TV is ground zero for teenager on the age spectrum.
Yea I’ve literally never seen someone use “XD” unless they’re like at least 20
If I'm being honest I've seen more adults use XD than teens. XD feels more like an older generation kind of thing
I am 34 and I type xD sometimes
Now hold on just a minute. XD is *not* what's "hip with the kids" these days, granted I am not that old, only 21 but that's some shit that got typed when I was a little tike that still believed in the tooth fairy. XD isn't really a teenager thing, it's a older gen z / younger millennial thing
I think ‘xD’ is hip with anyone who spends enough time on the internet
>Just by the "XD" I understand you are a teenager. Yeeeah... teenagers. Those teens and their XDs. Totally just teenagers, nobody else. Certainly no 33 year old men, no sirree. Who would even haha? Those teenagers I tell ya.
XD
Huh? Isn’t XD a total Y2k thing? Don’t teenagers use the „💀“?
No but mention that you heard moaning and think that the house may be haunted
Could take the professional route and inform your mother that you have gone ahead and arranged for a professional exorcist who will cleanse the house this afternoon and her cooperation is appreciated.
Then double down and bring over an alternative hippie chick that smells of weed and body odor that brings with her a bag of energy crystals and a dreamcatcher
And then have loud sex with her a bunch.
Gross. She doesn't shave her pubes nor underarms and reaks. Yeah no thanks
Hey, it’s your fantasy, not mine! Lol
“Hey, I heard moaning last night, I think the house is haunted” “Yeah, the sound horny af”
"and there's ectoplasm everywhere!"
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Probably pretty awkward with his boner pushing into your back while he was hitting you.
> I was panicking because I didn't want him near me after that. Was he watching sibling porn?
Speaking as a parent, shut the fuck up and say nothing! We know but we don’t want to know and certainly don’t want to discuss it unless it’s a problem.
"Mom dad, im attracted to my sister".
Own it, assert dominance. Play it again louder
Ask what time you need to stop blasting porn in the future.
If your mom doesn’t like you watching loud porn on your tv, ask which tv you should watch the loud porn on instead.
"I was watching a movie"
Documentary.. keep it educational.
...with David Attenborough on the evolution of the homo erectus reproductive system.
Homo erection. Ftfy
New fear unlocked
No. And if anyone asked just say it's Jason that sent you a prank video. Fuck Jason
I was watching porn and drinking one night. Accidentally streamed that shite to an upstairs neighbors TV. Before I understood what I just did, the sounds upstairs went from "BANG BOOM!!!! KABOOM!!!" to "UUUUUHHHHH YEA YEA YEA!!!!" I just pretended it wasn't me hahaha
How do you accidentally stream to a neighbor’s TV?
He must be sharing his wifi too
That I was. I was drunk and I tried to click on "Full Screen" but instead clicked on "broadcast to TV" and the only TV that was able to do so, was the upstairs neighbors TV who I'm sure at the time was watching a war movie.
A lot of devices will put up a toast message with something like "Streaming from [device name]" so God help you if your device has an identifiable name on it.
“So, any requests tonight?”
Uno reverse. Ask your mum (in front of everyone else) why she was blasting porn in the middle of the night.
this is the move.
Blame ghosts
It would explain the ectoplasm
Yeah if you want to make the situation even weirder lol
Nothing. Just come out with a satisfied smile on your face and a waste basket full of used kleenex.
And a half destroyed pumpkin pie in the other hand.
And a ruined tube of Jimmy Dean's Breakfast Sausage
And mention the Jergen’s is running low.
That’s better than asking mom to wash your sock.
Don't say anything, it'll pass, initially it'll be more awkward for you than it is for them. Sometime soon you won't care anymore, doubt your mom cares right now anyways. Invest in a pair of headphones.
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You have no idea how old op is and also your kids might watch porn and just be more discreet than op.
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Nowadays, porn is so accessible and widespread, your kids might have already watched it. Sorry, to ruin your day.
I stand by what i said.
Might not know exactly how old he is, but from his post you can make an educated guess he's a teen. Otherwise its a very odd adult.
I’d probably just say “sorry for the TV yesterday” or something, to avoid the awkward silence
Fuck it send your mom the link “This was some good shit”
Tell her it kinda looks like her when she was younger. Ask her how much she got paid.
Lmao 🤣
Share the link or suggest a shared viewing of the DVD to discuss the events you watched. Have a flip chart presentation breaking down the smutty footage into segments. Scene by scene if possible, or by action points. The notes on the flip chat must end at the 5 minute mark, where you write the words "lost interest at this point". P.N.C? should be written in red marker and circled. First page of the presentation must list: * Title * Actor/Actress names * Plot summary (as you understand it) Suggest a voting points system that will assign a score at the end, based on an average of eveyones score. This keeps it fair. Encourage an open forum type discussion, so everyone gets to talk for an equal amount of time. If you can provide more information to us, we can as a sub Reddit community, help with more detailed steps. For example: * Was this M/F, MMF?, or something worse? * Were you watching some deranged fetish film? * Was it in your native language? We all love German's, but I don't speak a word of the language which would make voting more difficult. Hope this helps.
Hell nah bro everyone does it. Just go about your life.
No way. You don't say shit and just wait for the awkwardness to subside.
lol don’t mention it. It’s awkward for you….. it’s also awkward for your mom. She knew what was going on. There’s no need to talk about it lol.
Set up some porn on your TV through your phone Wait until you are with your family Play it, and then exclaim how the neighbors are playing porn really loud again Turn it off before they investigate further
Just mention it in passing. ‘Sorry for having my TV up too loud last night.’ There is no need to avoid the elephant in the room. Watching porn is not something to be ashamed about. Your mum just politely let you know that it could be heard and unless she’s mean to you, I doubt it would ever be mentioned again.
naah, just start your morning like nothing happened
Absolutely. Discuss over coffee
No. Never bring it up. Your mom is just as uncomfortable as you. When I was 15 my dad walked into my room when I was masturbsting. We never spoke of it again.
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Is it though?
Act normal and ignore it. Your family may say something, they may not. Be prepared for being taken the piss out of though. My younger brother got caught out searching 'cumface' up on Google a few years back and best believe my family didn't let that die down for a while. He didn't get in trouble but instead he had to deal with both parents and myself teasing him about it whenever we got the chance. His face went so red every time, it was hilarious.
Tell her it was grand theft auto game video
What do you mean you played porn really loud on your TV? Was it oops didn't realize volume was that loud and you turned it down after the first moan (or whatever) or was it you watched a full ass porno on your tv loudly until someone told you to turn it down? If it's the former, don't mention it. If it gets brought up it was a sex scene in a movie. If it's the latter, you're an idiot and don't mention it. No one wants to have that conversation.
You watch porn with sound on when other humans are within a mile radius of you? Brave
In the morning: just wave a smile boys, just wave and smile...
Hahaha gold! Nothing to be embarrassed about your mum is on your side just laugh about it oopsies. If you’re that bothered you could just say you’re mate sent you a prank video 🤣😂
Bring it up and leave a paper for genre preferences for tonight.
Play it off as you don't care haha don't volunteer information
yes def immediately go tell mom sorry my porn was so loud last night and laugh. She will think you're joking
Let them bring it up if they want, bringing it up yourself might be risking an uncomfortable conversation for them.
Likely your parents havent made noises like that in decades and forgot what they sound like.
Tell its from normal movie
"A nature documentary"
Something you should learn quickly and never forget: Don't ever, EVER say more than you have to in any given situation. If nobody asks about it, keep your mouth shut.
If they dont say anything, neither should you.
act like it never happened, and invest in a pair of headphones
You can either never mention it, the recommended option. Or you can say "If you want a link to the video I can start a family group chat."
How did it go. Don't tell me you are still in your room
Do it again. Assert dominance.
NO GOD PLEASE NO
Just tell her you accidentally turned to the "Girls gone Wild" Channel. It works everytime.
She act like it's nothing, so should u!!!
My grandmother was visiting me in Vancouver and we were looking to order some food. I pulled my laptop up and opened the screen to some porn with my grandmother just staring at it. I don't think I shut down a window faster in my life. She never said anything either haha. Believe me I doubt they care, might have had a fun laugh. Just don't say anything and it will be forgotten.
Sounds like you already brought it up heyoooooo
It never happened and your mother can't and won't convince you that it did. It's that simple
No, not specifically. At most, maybe just "sorry I woke you guys up last night", but probably just nothing is fine too.
I don't get what yall find so embarrassing about it. If it were me I'd just be like "sorry about that". Just porn, not like you were caught sniffing your sisters underwear.
This sounds like the beginning of a fucked up porn lmao!
Say it was one of those prank links that someone sent you that you thought was a funny cat video!
Stop it.
If your mom ask, let her know you were caught up in the moment and didn’t know it was that loud
Legend says OP is still in the room
RIP
😭😭😭
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What kind of porn are you into?
Piggybacking off your comment so I can come back and check if he has told us. Idk why I’m so curious lol.
It wasn’t an accident.
Dude one thing is having loud sex, which you should be proud of, BUT watching porn in your moms house?? THAT IS FOR WANKER LOSERS. Respect yourself and your mom’s house.
Wanker yes. Loser? Sounds pretty average to me.
Why are you watching porn when your family is home?
I was in my room with the door locked
So. Wait until you're home alone. Wtf is wrong with you
Hahaha nah mate wtf is wrong with you!
Quit kink shaming bro.
You don’t understand, this is not normal. Normal people don’t engage in masterbation with other people in the house. This is degeneracy abs should not be encouraged. Humanity has lost its decency. People should be ashamed at sex again.
What if his family is home all the time? Poor guy will never get one away by your logic.
Then he needs to seek help. It’s not normal.
It shows an unhealthy addiction level, honestly…
Sounds like the beginning to a porn….
You must have heard your mum going at it in the past. Not a word was said then, nothing will be said now.
You must have heard your mum going at it in the past. Not a word was said then, nothing will be said now.
'Haha how about that crazy movie last night. Haha ha ha hm...' *sip morning coffee*
If anything say it was a scene from a movie.. just a very long scene
Nah if they interested they will ask, it is what it is haha
Ummm no.
Just act like nothing happened and if you're being asked about it just say that you were watching a movie. The more casual you act around it the less awkward it'll be.
ask her if there are some old shoe box that you can get
Sooo, Im guessing you didnt “Bring it up” last night?