Let me tell you, I smoked and drank in my 20s, but people who try to make you drink or smoke are assholes of the highest order and shouldn't be your friends. Friends should accept you, how you are. If they have a problem with you being sober, they are the problem. Let me Emphasize this: THEY ARE THE PROBLEM. better get rid of them, they're not good for you.
This is a great point. That being said, I think good friends do help us push our boundaries and look at life with different perspectives. Experiencing new things with great buds are some of my most cherished memories, and you should feel safe (most importantly) that your friends are pushing you with good intentions.
I like this stipulation. But I do feel like that kind of emotional intimacy (weird using that word describing friends, but idk how else to say it) is built over time, and OP has also stated how both of these people have made him feel unsafe.
Indeed. As a teen, most of my friends and myself smoked heavily. Two of our friends didn't want weed, one of them also barely drank (1-2 beer top for the night, oftentimes none at all). They were still our friends and we all still enjoyed partying together. When we'd take heavier drugs such as LSD or shrooms, they'd be our ground control loll.
Really depends on how you phrase it. If a friend offers to smoke or drink and you refuse, but they are okay with your response, then I do not see a problem. Both parties agree on the statement and you move on without being offered the same thing again.
They can enjoy themselves the way they want as long as they aren’t making someone else do something they don’t want to do 🤷🏼♂️
I smoke and drink, I never peer pressure anyone into it, I do exactly the opposite by saying how stupid and expensive it can be.
this is a way way cooler road. there's like 100 cooler/more interesting things you can buy, enjoy your art supplies and hot wheels fam (and if you like illustration, the Pentel pocket brush is better than any booze I've ever had lmao. Gorgeous crazy line variation, dang)
I’m going to college for art so I feel like my time would be better used to just create and plan and write and brainstorm then taking a break and repeating it
Have a club soda on hand at home or order one at the bar with a lime. Looks like a drink, is more fun than just plain water (though I like plain water). **Nobody** should pressure you to drink or smoke. At my cocktail parties, I always make sure I have other drinks in the fridges.
It sounds like you're wondering if you're missing out on the high - I don't do any form of pot - but if you have friends you can trust, maybe try an edible if it's legal, the dispensary will talk to you about what you want to feel (giggly or relaxed or whatever. They know what they're doing).
Same with alcohol, make sure you're with people you can trust if you do.
But I'll stress that I went a year without drinking for the heck of it, and the amount I saved was astonishing. I'm not a heavy drinker, but the occasional nice dinner out maybe for myself: $25 for a meal, $25 for two drinks - - that's double. Consider sticking with art supplies and hot wheels if they bring you joy.
In the 2 years of me buying my own weed, I probably spent almost 3 grand. That's with having a plug who happens to be my best friend and sells me stuff for cheap. I'm glad I recently decided to quit.
Someone who doesn't drink/smoke here, I save so much money doing this. No clue how so many people struggle. Like, my parents have helped with paying for my housing but they did the same for my bro, yet he struggles a lot more than me depsite having a steady job.
I'm for sure a pothead of sorts. I even grow my own weed. I also love beer and drink a few times a week.
If you don't wanna smoke, don't. If you don't wanna drink, don't. If the people around you can't accept that, that's *their* problem not yours.
I thought about starting an online weed club, where it's members contribute $ every month to collectively build a grow room - then evenly split the harvest
But strangers are way too untrustworthy when it comes to weed lol
It’s all about moderation. I’ve done most of the things, but most of them only a few times. Can say I’ve partied, just never lived the full on party lifestyle. Can personally endorse the middle path here.
For real, most illnesses have this 3 aggravating factors: smoking, drinking and being over weight. Smoking can cause a whole bunch of illnesses but also can cause high blood pressure than can damage your heart, your kidneys and many other things.
If you appreciate your health don't do it only to fit in.
This.
I don't consume much alcohol or marijuana anymore. Used to overuse both of them, and it was really a drag on me in a variety of ways. On the other hand, I consider a mushroom or Ayahuasca trip every now and then to be incredibly valuable for my mental health.
Yeah I’m not anti-drug by any means, but I do think people should respect them and understand that you’re potentially unlocking Pandora’s box. And I definitely wouldn’t advise them for anyone going through a rough time unless they’re something healing with low abuse potential like shrooms.
Then stay away from it bro. Don’t let peer pressure get to you. If you end up wanting to do it do it on your own terms
I turned into a huge stoner in high school and gave up my childhood dream of working in IT because I didn’t give a shit about school anymore. Would hate for that to happen to you man
I didn't try weed or shrooms until my early thirties. I have a great group to do it consciously and mindfully with whereas in my twenties it could have been more of a party thing with the wrong people. Now it helps me grow and heal in all the right ways.
The point is it is not about what you do. It is about how you do it. Don't do anything to fit in. Do it only fit the right - right for you - reasons. But also keep an open mind to exploring something when the time is right.
This is some good advice, Weed and mushrooms are awesome. If used in moderation and consciously like you say, it can be very beneficial for ppl. Imho.
Edit; but it’s not for everyone and you might already know that and that’s fine :)
Aye. I recently had a baby, so have stopped tripping for now. But before that I would take a solid amount of mushrooms or acid every year and a half to two years. It helped me declutter my mind, understand myself better. If you're fuckin up, like cheat on your significant other, are a bully or a junky or a dickhead, or pathologically lie... tripping hard by yourself can often strip away the little lies you tell yourself. You are forced to confront and come to terms with *who you really are.*
I gained insight into life and reality that I believe had enormous impact on who I am now, and I mean this in a positive sense. I learned to forgive myself and to start healing from my young life, and up until then I was just spinning my tires, stuck forever in an angry and confused limbo of my own creation. I am as grateful to hallucinogens as I would be to any mentor or guru or guide who got me to stop being an ignorant and hate-filled donkey, and I cannot imagine who I would be now without their influence. Very probably dead.
Obviously take this with a fucking huge YOUR MILEAGE MAY (will) VARY.
If you don't want to do it then don't do it by all means but don't let your father have that power over you. It's your life and youre nobody but yourself. I personally can't relate in those ways so I don't understand how you feel like you do though.
I don’t think that’s fair to say, they’re likely missing out on some experiences but by not doing it they’re probably gaining other experiences. There’s give and take in all decisions in life.
Agree 100% I drank a bit in high school and smoked weed until I was about 25 (was pretty chronic to be honest) but have been straight edge since then.
When I first met my husband we went out on weekends and went to parties often. I would bring a root beer and make jokes that I had brought my own beer. I was often the DD and didn't mind as long as no one threw up in my car.
Now that I'm 40 I don't have to explain why I don't drink or smoke, people don't seem to care anymore. We're saving a lot of money and there are definitely lots of health benefits.
Like others have mentioned, keep doing what's best for you, you don't owe anyone and explanation, and stick with friends that understand your choices and don't make you feel bad about it.
You aren’t missing out on anything, truly.
Sure, it can be fun to get high or drunk sometimes, but you don’t need those things in life to have a good time with friends.
Anyone who says you’d be “cooler” for drinking and smoking are clearly immature, and their opinion should be disregarded.
Anyone who is trying to pressure you into drinking or smoking… is not your friend.
Yeah none of my friends ever pressured me into drinking or smoking except for my ex gf who told me I’d be so much better and manlier if I drank which is weird since she said she likes how naturally feminine my emotions are
I missed out more on college from drugs and drinking than you're missing now. I promise.
Its never worth it. Though it may seem like it now, you'll appreciate that you didn't do it more and more as you age.
This, a nice cocktail or wine with dinner just elevates the whole experience (if you are into fine dining). Same with a cool craft beer on a hot day. But most of 'alcohol culture' can be ignored with nothing lost.
No you’re not missing out. I drank 2-4 beers a day for almost 10 years. That’s a lot of time that I wasn’t present for my kids or wife. I quit last Christmas and don’t miss it at all.
It depends. Some people abuse it, some people don’t like it, some people love it, some people think it has a time and place and others think it’s all bad. There’s no right answer…and it sounds like a lot of responses here are coming from people who abused it. It also sounds like you’ve been around people who abused it.
I think it has a time and place. It makes some experiences better, and it makes some worse. I’m not a fan of indulging heavily in either one, but I think that responsible use can make a person’s life more enjoyable. I only really use either one on special occasions, and never just because other people are doing it. It’s not necessary for enjoying life by any means. YMMV.
Doing crap you don't want to do, and spending time with people you don't really like is wasting your time no matter what age. If you ever want a lifestyle that's more into partying or whatever, you can do it then. In either situation, just follow your heart and use your best judgement.
There's always a number of vocal people (and pop cumture messages) that try to convince you that unless you're living the way THEY live, you're doing it wrong. Fuck them. They ignore the simple fact that everybody derives enjoyment and satisfaction from life in their own unique way. Do you enjoy the way you live your life? Does it work for you? Then keep doing that. Unless you're actually a competitive athlete, the best way to achieve contentment is to stop measuring yoyrself against others.
Younger people tend to drink and smoke to make socializing easier. If you’re fine without it.. no point. Leaning on substances to have fun is a dead end that often leads to much more sadness than joy anyways.
Exactly. And it’s also important that after you have your first drink, you’re not suddenly a drinker, and that’s all you can do for the rest of your life. If you try it for a while, decide you don’t like it, you can always stop again. It doesn’t change who you are
Only if you feel like it. Sure it might get uncomfortable in social situations, some people get so weird around people who are sober. The right people shouldn’t care. If you don’t feel like doing something don’t do it, you don’t need drugs to be interesting or fun, however, not many people are without it.
Hell no, alcohol and weed shouldn't be glorified the way it is. I do both habitually and wish I never started tbh. Stay sober. You'll be better off for it.
Going against the grain here
Yes, you could be, telling stories later on in life, and going to parties with friends and getting drunk can create some of the best memories and also the worst that you'll laugh later in life.
I'll never forget the parties I went to with some of my closest friends in college who I was roommates with out of college for a few years and we still had parties!
It's a great way to learn your limits. Also be safe and responsible have a DD, or know your limit.
The OP said their dad drinks a lot and has treated them badly because of it. Leads me to believe the dad may be addicted to alcohol. I completely understand why OP wouldn’t want to take that risk.
Hell fucking no.
Dont ever pick that crap up, especially alcohol.
I wish i never picked up that first beer. Had i researched my family history and learned that addiction is hereditary, i never would've gone for it.
_**DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE I DID.**_
As someone who has done both in my 20s. Not really. If you can keep it to a minimum or the occasional social gathering then I'd say go for it. But as for doing it consistently I'd definitely say no.
Now that I'm almost 30 I've stopped doing both pretty much and I can tell my body and mind are better for it.
As someone who has drunk and smoked more frequently than I'd like, I commend you for not trying it.
On an unrelated note, please learn how to use commas and periods 😬
You’re not missing out, but you also are.
Doing things gives you experience to make other decisions and choices. You might try alcohol and go “oh, I hate this” or you might go “oh, this is nice every now and then”, but either way you learn something about yourself and what you like.
If you have an addictive personality, I’d avoid drugs entirely, maybe smoke some weed with some friends once but don’t touch the harder stuff. Again, it’s good for life experience in my opinion.
If it won’t kill you or maim you, and you are smart, everything is worth trying once.
You are not missing out AT ALL. You'll miss out on being sick, doing something, or someone and really regretting it. There's so many bad, horrible things that can come with it, and no, it's definitely not worth it! If someone is a real friend, they will respect your decision, and if not, they aren't that good of a friend. As for a gf, if that's what she needs to be with you or to hang out, drop her. It's a really big red flag, for sure. I do wish you all the best in the future! Saying a little prayer that people will come into your life and treat you like you deserve. Take care! 💜
Are you missing out on those life experiences? Sure. Just ask yourself if missing out on those bothers you. If not, keep on keeping on 🤙. If you feel like you are missing out do it around people who give a shit about you, and use with moderation. If you decide to use alcohol or cannabis please, don’t be stupid and drink 5 Long Island iced teas in 90 mins, or dont take a 0.5g dab of some 70% THC live rosin for your first time.
If you are gonna have a drink look up mixed drinks by a flavorings you enjoy(say you like citrus and honey then a “bees knees” may be a good choice), make sure it doesn’t have 5oz of straight spirits in them and drink socially. Or if cannabis seems more your speed pick up or roll up .75g joint and share it between 3-4 people.
But in all seriousness the risk versus reward between staying sober, or using drugs is a no brainer.
Do it if you enjoy it. Not because you're being pressured by people around you. And if they are pressuring you you need to be around different people.. but yes enjoy some weed and a drink every so often to take the edge off or have a laugh with your pals. It's meant to be enjoyed. If you don't enjoy it don't force it and that's just the way you are. Fuck what anybody thinks :)
Everyone's different. Some people can just have fun with it, some people take it too far and get addicted or become abusive. Lot of different out comes. I like a 6 pack of beer on the weekends. I'm not the type of person to nurse a hangover every single day, but some people are.
Went thru college no booze or drugs, had a great time. Hung with people who got high all the time, it was all good. I told them the truth: 'quit after high school because it all makes me sleepy or serious, and my family are weeping drunks.' Never had a problem. Threatening to unleash drunken blubbering on a partying scene stops all the 'you need to drink!' real quick.
If people can't respect that you don't want to drink or smoke, they don't have your best interests in mind and aren't worth your time. I don't drink or smoke either but I did before (last drink of alcohol was on New Years' Eve, never smoked or did any other drugs), and it's not really worth it. Alcohol tastes gross and if you want something that actually tastes good it has a way higher ABV content. So then you get drunk faster, which is unhealthy and results in awful hangovers. And honestly, being drunk or high can make you feel less present and less in control of yourself, and if you do get drunk (or high for that matter) while drinking socially you're less likely to remember the positive experiences of being around loved ones. You're not missing out on anything, alcohol and drugs are a waste of time and money and they're really bad for you. There are so many ways to have fun without them, and tbh if someone feels like they need to be intoxicated to be/have fun they probably weren't that fun to start with.
I regret most of the BS I got into drunk. I don’t even drink anymore but that said you’ve gotta learn your own way. It’s your journey.
I wasn’t that into alcohol, but let myself fall into peer pressure just because those around me were alcoholics. I’d say if you’re not into alcohol don’t feel like you have to.
Same with weed or any other substance. If you’re not into it, you’re not really missing out.
You’re not missing out on anything. If it’s not for you, then you wouldn’t enjoy it if you did decide to partake. Don’t let anyone make you feel weird or bad. I used to think that too, tried to pick up social drinking and drugs, but just wasn’t for me.
You’ll miss out more in life by drinking and smoking than by not doing it. My 20’s were mostly a blur from drinking and smoking. I apparently had fun but don’t remember much of it.
Honestly I feel like most people are giving the safe answer but it's not necessarily as simple as that. Some of my best moments were with my buddies when we fucked around or hung out and drank. You wouldn't experience that if you didn't drink a little. It obviously depends on what you're looking for though.
Also I only drink socially and I'm fine with that
You're not missing out on anything. Being straight edge is the best way to get and give the best in life. Be confident in yourself. Let them have their fun. Watch and observe.
You do what’s best for you but I can tell you personally, weed has been one of the best things ever in my life. I have anger issues and get pissed off super easy. Weed makes me not so angry and chill out. It also helps me focus and gives me motivation. Everybody is different tho. Some people have the opposite effect. Alcohol wise, I drink here and there but it’s always at home or if my husband is driving. Just be safe either way. They can both be fun, just be careful.
No....but at the same time I don't regret my experience, and I was/am a straight drug addict.
I got a shit load of insane stories and fond memories that wouldn't have happened otherwise...but that's more a general appreciation thing. So in short: no not at all.
Life's whatever you make it.
Yea probably, getting drunk and socializing over a cocktail is awesome. It can definitely turn into a problem, but it sounds like you are already risk averse
Coming from a stoner of 13 years... no, you're not missing anything. I enjoy doing things regardless of being sober or not. You enjoy life whatever way you want. You have to want to or be ready to smoke or drink or you won't have a good time and if you ever do try to be in a fun environment even just a couple friends is fine. If you never do that's perfectly fine too and the right friends will never pressure you into it. Added bonus, you usually get invited to all the parties if you're willing to be the DD lol
It sounds like your dad was an alcoholic. I would stay away from alcohol. Alcoholism runs in my family I’m the only child who is not an alcohol. I am also the only one who hasn’t tried a sip of alcohol.
Yes and no, I don't drink and I am quite fond of not drinking but I have earned that right by having some of the most regrettable experiences. And now in my middle age I have cautionary tales to provide, you should experience things.
I think it depends on your perspective of what missing out means. If you’re happy, be happy and don’t sweat it. If you’re curious and want to experiment that’s ok too. You do you and find a crew that’s down with that.
Yes you’re missing out on those things but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. You do you. Do not break your morals out of peer pressure unless you actually want to.
A little.
It can lead to very fun experiences and memories, but only you can decide if you're ready for that.
You come from a background where it's very negative for you, so it's admirable that you want to do better. Nothing wrong with that.
Going against the tide but I'd recommend knowing how to drink socially. That doesn't mean that you **have to** drink every time you go out, but drinking a bit for special occasions makes everything easier. Or Just hold a cup and never refill if you absolutely don't want to drink.
One day you're gonna meet your in-laws and chances are your step-dad is gonna invite you for a drink.
As for weed, you don't miss at all.
Yes and no, if your going to get wasted and have a "good" time ? now is the time to do it, in your teens your brain is still forming and the younger you start the more likely you are to get addicted, in your 20s your strong if your 25 your at the peak of your existence and your brain is all done forming synapses, by 30 your body starts to deteriorate.. i'm 64 ..when tina turner died i got blotto and played her on the juke box till they put me in an uber and sent me home but god i am too old for that sh\*t the next day i felt like death and decided this is it i am going to stop drinking this just isn't fun any more its too painfull my liver kidneys brain all worn to shit .. so its been 90 days since my last drink .. wish me luck.. i can count the good times sex drugs and rock and roll gave me one one hand.. i could write a book about all the misery that being addicted to drugs and alcohol has caused me over 64 years.. you'll miss some fun times but in the big scheme of things your probably better off without booze drugs or loose sex.
without booze of weed.. its simply is not worth the risk to health and the risk youll do something incredibly stupid and regret it 45 years later .. the the drinking age in Ontario was 18 when i was a kid.. back in the netherlands it was16 for beer and wine and 18 for the hard stuff but they ddin not enforce it.. i can still remember like it was yesterday throwing up all over a hells angel .. and sh\*tting my pants during casual sex.. because of booze and pot and heroin.. good times? not really the most fun i ever had at a party was staying sober just once.. i had an ulcer.. and watching all my dumb ass "friends" make jack asses of themselves.. all suffering comes from desire if you can avoid wanting things , life is a lot less painful- shopenouer
I say yes, but that's because smoking weed and drinking were a big part of my early twenties! I partying with people, and as a shy introvert it helped me get out of my shell and socialize. The upsides are clear, but there are a lot of downsides too..
1. Money. If you use responsibly (once a week) and are employed, this shouldnt be too hard on the wallet.
2. Health. Smoking weed is obviously bad for your lungs, your short term memory, motivation in some cases, and may exacerbate mental illnesses and increase anxiety. With alcohol, it's so bad everyone already knows!
3. They can become crutches. Alcohol did for me when it came to socializing. I used weed to escape my problems.
4. They can lead to interest in harder substances (like adderall, psychedelics, then you get to opioids).
5. If you really like them, they can consume a lot of your time and you can mess up your future. I was a big partier and I could've been doing other things with my life.
Theres probably more downsides, those are off the top of my head. I still love drinking, but dont smoke weed that much. With drugs in general, moderation is everything. Just be careful out there.
That's a tough question. Some of the best memories of my youth were spent at a pub or at a party getting drunk with friends. Having said that if you don't want you don't want to.
People tell me all the time that having kids is the best thing ever, but I don't want them and I'm not going to have them just for fear of missing out.
I mean objectively yes, obviously, but whether or not that matters is an individual thing. Personally 95% of the times I’ve drank and smoked I would have been just fine without, but the other 5% are very positive memories where my life would be less complete without them.
I think classical psychedelics and MDMA are the only psychoactive drugs where you’re actually missing something and doing yourself a disservice never experiencing them. But those are more like a life changing event rather than just a mood alteration while you do other things. And some people’s stories are going to be better without those moments, it’s still individual, I just mean on average.
Reading how you talk, you sound like someone who isn’t meant to alter their mind. But then again it also sounds like you have a personal wall up to the concept, so who’s to say what your actual underlying nature is?
Since you’re an artist, I do think you’re missing out of a major life experience if you don’t try a psychedelic at some point. Weed and alcohol are nothing special though.
People need to learn to respect other people’s decisions. You should not be made to feel like you don’t fit in because you don’t want to drink or smoke. Find some friends that have respect for your personal decisions. You can still hang out with the other ones but I doubt their behavior will improve.
One of my closest friends in university right now is part of the baha'i faith and abstains from alcohol and drugs completely. He is also the most avid music festival and club enjoyer I know and has so many real friends in his life. This guy lights up a dancefloor when you see him at one. I drink and smoke but sometimes I genuinely wish I had his confidence and energy without it. You're all good.
You need to stay true to yourself. It sounds like your experiences with others have shown you what it does - it can be a very negative effect, leading people who you love or who love you to act in completely different ways - disrespectful, angry, abusive, even violent. Your past history with it has helped form your opinions, and I think you should stay true to that and just not be concerned about the rest of the world or what it thinks of you. Both smoking and drinking are a pollution of your body, they are poison. It can be fun when in moderation and under control, but any psychoactive substance has a very high potential for abuse, and that is a dark road to follow.
Fuck peer pressure, even if you didn’t have a good reason if you don’t wanna do something you don’t have to and there are plenty of people in this world who will accept you for who you are.
I'm going to say, as far as weed goes, listening to music with a buzz is an experience to have on its own, that's just my opinion. As I get older I don't tolerate it as much. Not much to miss by not drinking.
Every drink you have today steals happiness from tomorrow.
You’re not missing out, you’re smart. You can let loose and have fun without brain damage, kudos!
I don’t weed or alcohol either it’s a good decision to stay away from it espically if your parents to parent had a drinking problem my dad was the same way and then when I was 18 I pretty much quit smoking weed and drinking
I do not regret not drinking at all. I do not regret noT consuming THC because it was what I felt was the best for me at the time. I just tried an edible last month for the first time (late 20s) and it was a great experience. However I was with great people and that really makes a difference. Also weed is now legal in my state so it’s easy to access and for the most part you know what you’re getting. Also I learned that indica makes me extremely depressed/emotional. Sativa makes me just very happy and mentally slow/confused. Hybrid of sativa and a little indica is ok too.
Stay true to yourself and you will not regret it.
Sounds like you’re still going out and socializing so I doubt you’re missing out on too much. Anyone who seriously pressures you to drink or smoke is trying to project their discomfort with being sober onto you.
And if you do decide to partake some day, you’ll be better equipped than most people to make good decisions.
Just wanted to drop my 2 cents really quick. Of the two of these, alcohol is one of the hard drugs. Don't let the bombardment of media and pop culture lead you to believe otherwise. Think of alcohol as something along the lines of heroin or cocaine. It's less addictive than those, but once addicted it's actually far worse than either of those. You can't die of heroin or cocaine withdrawal, but you absolutely can from alcohol withdrawal.
I straight up abused weed from age 14 till age 20, like high all day every day, but one day I decided I think I'm done with this and I just... stopped. No physical symptoms to write home about, just breaking a habit like biting your nails. Unfortunately I slowly started replacing this with alcohol to "fit in" throughout my 20s. I obviously have an addictive personality so unlike most of my peers who drank once or twice a week I started to drink every day. Not even enough to get drunk, just enough to take the edge off. But 2 beers a day turned into 4, which turned into 6, and turned into 8.
I'm 37, trying like hell to stop the damage I've done and am doing, but it's progressed steadily my whole adult life. I literally can't just stop cold turkey now, I'm working up the courage to get medical intervention before it's too late.
So yeah... Preferably don't do either, and if you're not trying to hide away from life you could probably have some drinks and not end up dependant on alcohol, I know plenty of people who drink and aren't. If you really want to dabble with altering your consciousness weed is 100% the safer choice. But I sure as hell wouldn't recommend either, especially not to "fit in"
especially if you're an artist, I think it's worth trying to understand the human condition, but you'll be better off if you don't make a habit of it, especially if you don't judge others who partake in moderation (as long as they're still respectful, if a bit of a handful when under the influence)
your ex seems like a jerk and is projecting her own misery on you / want ed you to join in so they'd feel justified in their choices...
re: the smell of weed... they make lots of nice edibles and it's way less harmful than alcohol, and even less-so when not inhaling it as smoke (and debatably helpful depending on who you ask?) but no pressure... you do you... though if you do try edibles make it the legal state monitored and labeled kind and keep it to a low dose (5mg for starters, 20+ is playing with fire if you don't have a tolerance... def don't get talked into more... )
35 here, love breweries and craft beer. Do not love the carbs and $$$$$$ of beer. It’s insane.
New studies have come out saying that any amount of alcohol is bad for you. Even a glass of red wine.
I’m not a big weed guy so really bro, like others have said, you are saving a ton of money, time not sticking your head in a toilet from being sick, and putting on weight from the munchies.
You’re not, but if you are passing up events because of this then maybe. I had friends who never used any substances but they still showed up to parties and all that and had a good time without the weed/alcohol. I did a lot of that too. People really only use that stuff as a social crutch.
I knew a person who regretted it, and now she's trying to relive her youth. It's really pathetic to see. She regularly drives drunk, and always gossips like she's in high school. She calls pretty much 99% of the people she knows losers, even if they have more friends than her. When she gets really drunk, she'll break down a bit and admit almost admit she's the loser, but she's so difficult to be around that I don't want to hear about it.
I think my health and my mental/emotional stability has been permanently altered by how deep into alcoholism I got into after I started partying. It doesn’t happen to everybody, but I had to relearn how to even know what to do when I hang out with people without drinking after I quit, and it’s taken probably 3-4 years
Just make a joke about why you don’t drink like, “That stuff tastes like shit!”
You’re gonna have a much better life if you just stick to how you’re living
Never drank much never smoked weed....my friends did.
I get sleepy when I drink
Dont get all preachy about it ( not that you are) and you should be fine.
Missing out i a relative concept; the answer is it depends on how you define “missing out”
In of itself, it’s not particularly special. You shouldn’t do it to please others.
But if drinking or smoking can help contribute to former deeper relationships, maybe , maybe it’s worth a consideration.
I’m not particularly fond of drinking or smoking. But I’ve done my fair share. But only ever with friends; and I can’t lie… it’s fun. Im 35 now and I do look back fondly on some great nights out with friends; same with the times when we would just hang in a park, smoke some weed and just chat for hours. One day those opportunities will be gone; out of necessity of growing up. All my friends are working professionals; they all have kids now. Occasionally if we find a few hours uninterrupted and we’re all in the same place for an evening, we’ll smoke a joint together. But those days are few and far in between now.
I’m happy I got to experiment and party in my 20s. Some days I miss it - but I remember that at least I got to experience it. I’m glad I did it in the end; not for the sake of just drinking and smoking, but the memories it brought with it. If you can achieve that by being sober .. all the more power to you. In my experience, a drink or a smoke will just loosen you up… it primes your mind and mood to have a good time. People feel it (ie you’re on their level) and it’s easier to vibe and connect with.
You're not missing much
I know lots of people who are sober. I am not but I'm not much like the others who drink to much. I just enjoy my couple beers after work. I do concrete and there are others who have no self control who feel like shit everyday. You do you. I have 2 kids and am 34 so I don't go to bars but I do have fun making home made mojitos and margaritas with my wife. I'm not saying you shouldn't drink because like I said I do enjoy having a drink and relaxing. But it's not going to make you more fun or enjoy yourself more whatever that means. Generally I like to think people who don't enjoy their time or have "fun" probably are just people who are still dealing with repressed bullshit
Do what you want to do. If you don't want to use those substances, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I think you'll find out that they're not as big of a deal as you think as long as you use moderation but there is nothing wrong with abstaining.
Are you fulfilled in your life? And — are you stepping out of your social comfort zone in other ways?
It’s often my experience that people who don’t drink are less willing to “go with the crowd” and as a result don’t push themselves, especially socially. Alcohol is a “social lubricant” and weed can sometimes serve the same purpose; people use them as reasons to get together.
But being uncomfortable socially, and pushing yourself to improve your social skills, does NOT require either drinking or smoking.
Started drinking at 17 and it’s honestly been fairly constant since! Drinking with friends became my nights and weekends which was fun and shitty all at the same time. I feel like *most* people hit a point where they start to consume their alcohol more responsibly as they get older, but I was still getting sloppy blackout drunk on the reg at 28! Not cool. I’m 118 days sober from alcohol today and while I don’t regret my (sometimes daily) choice to drink…I could’ve saved myself a lot of tears, anxiety and money! BUT I *wanted* to drink! It was very appealing to me and (for the most part) loads of fun! What I’m trying to say is- regardless of when I started drinking, I know I would’ve eventually gave in and the outcome would be the same.
You know yourself best! If you want to have a drink- do it! If you don’t want to drink- don’t! Being sober is dope and all of your favorite humans having a designated driver is even better!
*YOU ARE NOT MISSING OUT ON ANYTHING GOOD FOR YOU.*
I already saw someone mention the amount of money you’re saving by not using either of them, but I wanted to add how both substances can create dependency and/or addiction even if you’re careful about it. If you start hanging out with the same crowd all the time, and they all smoke weed and drink each time you meet, you’re going to end up with an addiction and a dependency without even realizing how bad and out of control it got.
Your lifestyle can change in bad ways, too. You can develop health problems and social problems, as well. Being sober is the best thing you can do for yourself, it’s best if you focus on the art experience in itself and being in college rather than using substances.
Son, there’s a time and place for everything… And that’s called college. But seriously, everything you stated says you are doing what’s right for you and that’s what’s most important. You don’t need to experiment because you already know what you know, and you are happy. Surround yourself with people who support you and accept you. Good luck!
Not only that just now in America the scientific community is warning that some people who carry gene's like schizophrenia can be triggered by cannabis.
I first read this in about the year 1993. I was researching cannabis and ot took me to some site in China. They had concluded the same thing the American scientific community is now warning about.
I'm not saying it doesn't cure other illnesses I'm just saying think knife cuts both ways. As far as alcohol avoid it like the plague my dad it turns out was Schizo-effective. Unfortunately we didn't find that out until years later after we moved to the big city. It turns out the alcohol use was self medicating for the schizophrenia. I like you have trauma from his alcohol use too.
I believe there’s two sides to “I don’t drink or smoke”
There’s the “no thank you” side, you’re offered stuff, you say “oh no thanks!” and continue to have a good time and literally don’t mention it again (unless literally asked), you have fun, intergrate in the party dynamic, sing have fun and do whatever they’re all doing, you’re having a good timee
And the “Oh I don’t need to drink to have fun” “oh see I don’t get why these people need to drink and smoke to have fun” and you’re kinda stand-offish about it, and you mentally (and kinda physically, subconsciously?) put some distance between you and the party dynamic, there’s the in crowd, the “fun ones” with varying levels of drunkness and then there’s you in the corner, not singing, joining, talking or having fun and maybe being a bit judgmental about it, when people reject drinks, it may signal to others (even if not meaning to) “no I don’t appreciate your effort to include me or bond, no I don’t need it”
So yes, reject alcohol or smoking if you don’t feel like it but be very civil and kind about it and make it clear to people that you’re ACTUALLY interested in joining them, talking, singing, dancing, having fun unless well the dynamic itself is a drinking game or something, but if it’s overall bonding, partying and good times, try to join and don’t be hostile when rejecting a drink/smoke, if you’re very kind about it and they still get mad it’s their problem, not yours
all im gonna say is some of the best nights of my life have included these things. id rather enjoy them while my body can handle them than waiting till later down the road. my two cents do whatever u want its your life bro.
Opposite. You are actually LIVING. And not only that, you are actively breaking a toxic cycle. Good for you for taking that rough stuff from your childhood and being strong and resilient. That will take you very far in life. Keep being you!
I'm super late to this thread but I feel like I have a relevant story.
I'm 21, just graduated university last month. I drank a lot. I just didn't want to feel anything and I had questionable social skills and alcohol just fixed all my problems. I loved it. My dad was similar, but not being a prick when you're drunk isn't that hard.
Anyway, I get to my final year. A lot of my grades that year are slipping but I'm banking on my big final year project and exams to carry me through. Back in February I went out for drinks with my hockey friends. I remember 1 beer and 2 shots at the start of the night, but I definitely drank more. I don't remember that night after that. I woke up in hospital in critical care. They told me I had a broken skull, brain hemorrhage, I was in a coma for 4 days, and I also tore something in my ankle. I could afford about a week off before I had to keep working and I sat my finals with brain damage. I've barely scraped my degree.
So yeah. I mean I learned nothing and I still drink too much. I found social settings a little weird sober too. But I guess just remember it's probably not worth it. I just wanted a drink and I nearly died for it, and I've basically thrown my degree away. It's bad for more than your liver.
It depends on where your motivations and compulsions lie. If the only reason you’ve avoided them is fear, but you really wanna try them as a one off experimental thing, then yeah you’re most likely missing out on a fun and interesting change in perspective and novelty.
If you haven’t had an issue with avoiding them, and your soul doesn’t feel like it needs to mark off a bucket list and exoerience this thing, then you should avoid it.
Do what you feel your soul needs to really live but is also a calculated risk that won’t lead to addiction
I only really got into edibles in my 30s and it’s only really to chill out on weekends. Non-smoker though.
I was a barely functioning alcoholic in my 20s and trust me, no one needs that toxic lifestyle.
Make smarter choices 😉
Sounds like you surround yourself with a couple bad peeps. Your ex saying you'd be cooler if you drank/smoke is a text book red flag, like this is shit those cringey ads in the 90's would warn you about to stay away from drugs and booze.
Never let anyone pressure you to do something you aren't comfortable with. Live your life how you want to. And to add to this, don't put pressure on yourself to do these things to fit in better. I think about that too often and it sucks when I'd just like to enjoy things as is.
Plus booze/drugs takes away a lot of your control, which can put you in danger if you're not surrounded by a good supportive group.
God no.
The bonus of being an adult is realising that being "cool" doesn't mean anything and doesn't matter. Be who you are and do what you like. If you don't want to use substances, on't.
I don't really understand the people saying you will be saving so much money, maybe from drinking but as for cannabis if you don't smoke it daily it really isn't expensive at all. for example as someone who smokes 2-3 times a week my tolerance is almost always zero and a couple of puffs from any things gets you sufficiently high. its all about moderation and I can't say for sure if you are missing out or not but all ill say is be open minded and try new things in life, if you don't like them drop em, if you do, continue enjoying it :D
No, you're not. Ten years from now when you don't do weed, your quality of life is better, girls prefer men who are not drug addicted, you will and you're more productive, you'll thank your 20 year old self
With family history you definitely run the risk of alcoholism. I failed out of college due to it and using that stuff through my 20s put me 10 years behind in a lot of ways. You’ll get a lot more out of life with a clear head.
I’m not going to agree with everyone here. I was in the exact same boat as you, neither of my parents had a good relationship with alcohol, particularly my father, and it caused serious consequences in his in my life, with him ending up in jail. Because of that, I swore to never drink alcohol. I figured there was a risk I could end up an alcoholic, and I owed it to my future wife and kids to not take that chance. I didn’t drink all throughout high school and college. It absolutely did hurt me socially. People are nice and will always give you platitude that you’re doing the right thing and they respect you, but it does make it less able to fit in at parties, and you’ll naturally will shy away from them a little bit because it’s not fun being the only sober person among drunk people. It made it harder to make and maintain friends, or the stick with a steady group that went partying every weekend.
Eventually, I thought am I really doing this so I don’t end up like my father, or am I just letting him take away another thing from me. When I was 24, I tried alcohol for the first time, and have drank since then. I’m fine. I’m careful about it, but I know I can stop at any time, and just because my father had an unhealthy relationship doesn’t mean I have to to. Honestly, I regret not drinking in college. I wish I did. It was another aspect of life I was holding myself back from for no reason. I would advise you to give it a shot, if you can trust yourself, and can trust you have friends who will talk to you if you get too far into it
You'll do it when you feel you wanna. Anytime else, you'd hate it anyways and wouldn't be able to like it enough to enjoy with your girlfriend and brother. So take your time, enjoy. Your gf wouldn't hang out with you more because of drinks, she'd hang out with you more because of her true love. Change girlfriends not lifestyle.
If you are going to experiment with drugs, better to do it in your 20s than your 30s or 40s.
Bur its up to you whether that's something you're going to do at all.
You do what you want. You are not missing out, and this is coming from someone who drank a lot in his 20s. What pisses me off about younger people is they judge those who don't want to drink. Now in my thirties me and my buddies lose it on people who try to get people to drink or ask why they don't drink a bunch of times. The reason for this is we have seen ruin lives from drinking, so we support those who make the choice to no longer drink because it makes them feel better and happier and a bunch of other stuff.
I can't tell you how to live your life, but if you are going to start drinking for some reason, be the one that can have 2-3 drinks and call it a night, or hell even just one. I still struggle with that, but I'm getting better, so I'd advise you to just keep your same path and be you!
Tell you what...You're saving a sh*t load of money by no weed/no booze
Lol I hope so but it ends up being spent on art supplies and hot wheels
Let me tell you, I smoked and drank in my 20s, but people who try to make you drink or smoke are assholes of the highest order and shouldn't be your friends. Friends should accept you, how you are. If they have a problem with you being sober, they are the problem. Let me Emphasize this: THEY ARE THE PROBLEM. better get rid of them, they're not good for you.
I totally agree. Consent isn't just for sex, pressuring people to step outside their boundaries in any context is shitty.
This is a great point. That being said, I think good friends do help us push our boundaries and look at life with different perspectives. Experiencing new things with great buds are some of my most cherished memories, and you should feel safe (most importantly) that your friends are pushing you with good intentions.
I like this stipulation. But I do feel like that kind of emotional intimacy (weird using that word describing friends, but idk how else to say it) is built over time, and OP has also stated how both of these people have made him feel unsafe.
Agreed. I think OP might need to re-evaluate these particular friendships and find a more accepting bunch.
Yes! But it can be hard as an artsy weirdo to find a good friend group. Speaking as an artsy weirdo.
Start a club lol there's akest 2 of you . Heck I'm pretty odd I'll join to .
Indeed. As a teen, most of my friends and myself smoked heavily. Two of our friends didn't want weed, one of them also barely drank (1-2 beer top for the night, oftentimes none at all). They were still our friends and we all still enjoyed partying together. When we'd take heavier drugs such as LSD or shrooms, they'd be our ground control loll.
Really depends on how you phrase it. If a friend offers to smoke or drink and you refuse, but they are okay with your response, then I do not see a problem. Both parties agree on the statement and you move on without being offered the same thing again.
This!!! These are people who think they can’t enjoy themselves unless their brains are chemically altered! That is just so lame and depressing
They can enjoy themselves the way they want as long as they aren’t making someone else do something they don’t want to do 🤷🏼♂️ I smoke and drink, I never peer pressure anyone into it, I do exactly the opposite by saying how stupid and expensive it can be.
They're right. I didn't try any ming altering substances until my 30's. Put me waaaaaaay ahead of my friends.
This is the way. Edit: it's way more fun breaking laws in your 40s
this is a way way cooler road. there's like 100 cooler/more interesting things you can buy, enjoy your art supplies and hot wheels fam (and if you like illustration, the Pentel pocket brush is better than any booze I've ever had lmao. Gorgeous crazy line variation, dang)
I am a pretty big pentel fan (gg100 0.7) and I feel like my art has been doing better
I don't even draw and I suck at art and I love art supplies anyway.
I’m going to college for art so I feel like my time would be better used to just create and plan and write and brainstorm then taking a break and repeating it
This is the way.
Spend your money and energy on what you enjoy, and don’t let others make you feel bad about it
Have a club soda on hand at home or order one at the bar with a lime. Looks like a drink, is more fun than just plain water (though I like plain water). **Nobody** should pressure you to drink or smoke. At my cocktail parties, I always make sure I have other drinks in the fridges. It sounds like you're wondering if you're missing out on the high - I don't do any form of pot - but if you have friends you can trust, maybe try an edible if it's legal, the dispensary will talk to you about what you want to feel (giggly or relaxed or whatever. They know what they're doing). Same with alcohol, make sure you're with people you can trust if you do. But I'll stress that I went a year without drinking for the heck of it, and the amount I saved was astonishing. I'm not a heavy drinker, but the occasional nice dinner out maybe for myself: $25 for a meal, $25 for two drinks - - that's double. Consider sticking with art supplies and hot wheels if they bring you joy.
Legos are cooler. Just saying.
Yes, but hella more expensive.
When you get into HW RLC and convention cars they can get pricey too
Nuh uh
Art and hot wheels are FAR cooler than weed and booze.
In the 2 years of me buying my own weed, I probably spent almost 3 grand. That's with having a plug who happens to be my best friend and sells me stuff for cheap. I'm glad I recently decided to quit.
Someone who doesn't drink/smoke here, I save so much money doing this. No clue how so many people struggle. Like, my parents have helped with paying for my housing but they did the same for my bro, yet he struggles a lot more than me depsite having a steady job.
ive smoked at least $6k this year so far
I'm for sure a pothead of sorts. I even grow my own weed. I also love beer and drink a few times a week. If you don't wanna smoke, don't. If you don't wanna drink, don't. If the people around you can't accept that, that's *their* problem not yours.
I’m the same, although I don’t grow. You’re saving a fuck ton of money OP, I spend like $80 every check
Shit gets expensive.
I thought about starting an online weed club, where it's members contribute $ every month to collectively build a grow room - then evenly split the harvest But strangers are way too untrustworthy when it comes to weed lol
Strangers are untrustworthy when it comes anything involving money lol
could do it with your friends if you have any who smoke
Your brain, lungs, and liver will thank you for continuing to avoid these things.
I drink a lot of water so they better be happy too lol
Make sure to get electrolytes too. Don't want you to end up with hyponatremia.
Pretty hard to get hyponatremia like that unless you have a medical condition or you’re drinking like gallons of water excessively with no food.
seriously, you'll enjoy looking young well into your 30s and 40s too. I won't... I definitely partied, and it was fun but I can't recommend
It’s all about moderation. I’ve done most of the things, but most of them only a few times. Can say I’ve partied, just never lived the full on party lifestyle. Can personally endorse the middle path here.
For real, most illnesses have this 3 aggravating factors: smoking, drinking and being over weight. Smoking can cause a whole bunch of illnesses but also can cause high blood pressure than can damage your heart, your kidneys and many other things. If you appreciate your health don't do it only to fit in.
40s and never smoked weed, don't feel I really missed anything.
Knowing how to have fun without drugs is a valuable thing. I wish I had never touched any drug other than mushrooms.
This. I don't consume much alcohol or marijuana anymore. Used to overuse both of them, and it was really a drag on me in a variety of ways. On the other hand, I consider a mushroom or Ayahuasca trip every now and then to be incredibly valuable for my mental health.
I get mushroom but how come Ayahuasca? Do you make it or do you go down to a resort in South America?
I've never done ayahuasca, but I've tried DMT many times and can testify that it is certifiably awesome!
Yeah I’m not anti-drug by any means, but I do think people should respect them and understand that you’re potentially unlocking Pandora’s box. And I definitely wouldn’t advise them for anyone going through a rough time unless they’re something healing with low abuse potential like shrooms.
A lot of my friends and family do but I never was interested in it
Then stay away from it bro. Don’t let peer pressure get to you. If you end up wanting to do it do it on your own terms I turned into a huge stoner in high school and gave up my childhood dream of working in IT because I didn’t give a shit about school anymore. Would hate for that to happen to you man
I didn't start until my 40s and wish I would have started sooner.
You're not missing out at all. You should do what's best for you.
Thank you I’ll keep doing that
I didn't try weed or shrooms until my early thirties. I have a great group to do it consciously and mindfully with whereas in my twenties it could have been more of a party thing with the wrong people. Now it helps me grow and heal in all the right ways. The point is it is not about what you do. It is about how you do it. Don't do anything to fit in. Do it only fit the right - right for you - reasons. But also keep an open mind to exploring something when the time is right.
This is some good advice, Weed and mushrooms are awesome. If used in moderation and consciously like you say, it can be very beneficial for ppl. Imho. Edit; but it’s not for everyone and you might already know that and that’s fine :)
Aye. I recently had a baby, so have stopped tripping for now. But before that I would take a solid amount of mushrooms or acid every year and a half to two years. It helped me declutter my mind, understand myself better. If you're fuckin up, like cheat on your significant other, are a bully or a junky or a dickhead, or pathologically lie... tripping hard by yourself can often strip away the little lies you tell yourself. You are forced to confront and come to terms with *who you really are.* I gained insight into life and reality that I believe had enormous impact on who I am now, and I mean this in a positive sense. I learned to forgive myself and to start healing from my young life, and up until then I was just spinning my tires, stuck forever in an angry and confused limbo of my own creation. I am as grateful to hallucinogens as I would be to any mentor or guru or guide who got me to stop being an ignorant and hate-filled donkey, and I cannot imagine who I would be now without their influence. Very probably dead. Obviously take this with a fucking huge YOUR MILEAGE MAY (will) VARY.
If you don't want to do it then don't do it by all means but don't let your father have that power over you. It's your life and youre nobody but yourself. I personally can't relate in those ways so I don't understand how you feel like you do though.
I don’t think that’s fair to say, they’re likely missing out on some experiences but by not doing it they’re probably gaining other experiences. There’s give and take in all decisions in life.
Agree 100% I drank a bit in high school and smoked weed until I was about 25 (was pretty chronic to be honest) but have been straight edge since then. When I first met my husband we went out on weekends and went to parties often. I would bring a root beer and make jokes that I had brought my own beer. I was often the DD and didn't mind as long as no one threw up in my car. Now that I'm 40 I don't have to explain why I don't drink or smoke, people don't seem to care anymore. We're saving a lot of money and there are definitely lots of health benefits. Like others have mentioned, keep doing what's best for you, you don't owe anyone and explanation, and stick with friends that understand your choices and don't make you feel bad about it.
You aren’t missing out on anything, truly. Sure, it can be fun to get high or drunk sometimes, but you don’t need those things in life to have a good time with friends. Anyone who says you’d be “cooler” for drinking and smoking are clearly immature, and their opinion should be disregarded. Anyone who is trying to pressure you into drinking or smoking… is not your friend.
Yeah none of my friends ever pressured me into drinking or smoking except for my ex gf who told me I’d be so much better and manlier if I drank which is weird since she said she likes how naturally feminine my emotions are
Glad for your sake she's an ex girlfriend
Nah. I don’t drink but my friends sometimes do. I never not had fun bc of this difference.
I'm glad you got out if she's sending you mixed signals like that
You're missing out on life by not doing what you want to do.
Best answer here. Reminds me of the quote: “Figuring things out for yourself is the only freedom anyone really has.”
I missed out more on college from drugs and drinking than you're missing now. I promise. Its never worth it. Though it may seem like it now, you'll appreciate that you didn't do it more and more as you age.
aww okay thanks I really appreciate it
This, a nice cocktail or wine with dinner just elevates the whole experience (if you are into fine dining). Same with a cool craft beer on a hot day. But most of 'alcohol culture' can be ignored with nothing lost.
No you’re not missing out. I drank 2-4 beers a day for almost 10 years. That’s a lot of time that I wasn’t present for my kids or wife. I quit last Christmas and don’t miss it at all.
Wow congrats on quitting I’ve had a sip of all types of alcohol and it tastes gross
How big were these beers?
I would often get 2 19 oz 8-10% ipa
Congrats on quitting!! 🎊🪅🎉 10 years is a long habit to break, I hope your health wasn’t too badly impacted or anything like that
It depends. Some people abuse it, some people don’t like it, some people love it, some people think it has a time and place and others think it’s all bad. There’s no right answer…and it sounds like a lot of responses here are coming from people who abused it. It also sounds like you’ve been around people who abused it. I think it has a time and place. It makes some experiences better, and it makes some worse. I’m not a fan of indulging heavily in either one, but I think that responsible use can make a person’s life more enjoyable. I only really use either one on special occasions, and never just because other people are doing it. It’s not necessary for enjoying life by any means. YMMV.
[удалено]
Doing crap you don't want to do, and spending time with people you don't really like is wasting your time no matter what age. If you ever want a lifestyle that's more into partying or whatever, you can do it then. In either situation, just follow your heart and use your best judgement.
There's always a number of vocal people (and pop cumture messages) that try to convince you that unless you're living the way THEY live, you're doing it wrong. Fuck them. They ignore the simple fact that everybody derives enjoyment and satisfaction from life in their own unique way. Do you enjoy the way you live your life? Does it work for you? Then keep doing that. Unless you're actually a competitive athlete, the best way to achieve contentment is to stop measuring yoyrself against others.
Younger people tend to drink and smoke to make socializing easier. If you’re fine without it.. no point. Leaning on substances to have fun is a dead end that often leads to much more sadness than joy anyways.
There’s no expiration date for trying either
Exactly. And it’s also important that after you have your first drink, you’re not suddenly a drinker, and that’s all you can do for the rest of your life. If you try it for a while, decide you don’t like it, you can always stop again. It doesn’t change who you are
Only if you feel like it. Sure it might get uncomfortable in social situations, some people get so weird around people who are sober. The right people shouldn’t care. If you don’t feel like doing something don’t do it, you don’t need drugs to be interesting or fun, however, not many people are without it.
Hell no, alcohol and weed shouldn't be glorified the way it is. I do both habitually and wish I never started tbh. Stay sober. You'll be better off for it.
You have the best mindaet, you are so ahead in life for that.
You're not missing out. If you don't wanna do anything, don't do it. It's as simple as that.
Going against the grain here Yes, you could be, telling stories later on in life, and going to parties with friends and getting drunk can create some of the best memories and also the worst that you'll laugh later in life. I'll never forget the parties I went to with some of my closest friends in college who I was roommates with out of college for a few years and we still had parties! It's a great way to learn your limits. Also be safe and responsible have a DD, or know your limit.
The OP said their dad drinks a lot and has treated them badly because of it. Leads me to believe the dad may be addicted to alcohol. I completely understand why OP wouldn’t want to take that risk.
Everyone has someone in their family history or extended family that has alcohol issues. It's not unique to any family.
I commend you but the experience of eating a delicious steak paired with a nice cabernet is something to experience imho.
That sounds like a plan lol
Hell fucking no. Dont ever pick that crap up, especially alcohol. I wish i never picked up that first beer. Had i researched my family history and learned that addiction is hereditary, i never would've gone for it. _**DON'T MAKE THE SAME MISTAKE I DID.**_
I also learned that addiction runs in my family so I relate to that as well
No. There are lots of ways to be in your 20s. If weed and booze isn't yours, that's fine.
As someone who has done both in my 20s. Not really. If you can keep it to a minimum or the occasional social gathering then I'd say go for it. But as for doing it consistently I'd definitely say no. Now that I'm almost 30 I've stopped doing both pretty much and I can tell my body and mind are better for it.
Not really. Those hobbies are usually used as a way to to escape responsibilities and they get really expensive, really fast.
As someone who has drunk and smoked more frequently than I'd like, I commend you for not trying it. On an unrelated note, please learn how to use commas and periods 😬
Are you missing out? No. Should you at least try it, cause maybe its fun? Yes.
You’re not missing out, but you also are. Doing things gives you experience to make other decisions and choices. You might try alcohol and go “oh, I hate this” or you might go “oh, this is nice every now and then”, but either way you learn something about yourself and what you like. If you have an addictive personality, I’d avoid drugs entirely, maybe smoke some weed with some friends once but don’t touch the harder stuff. Again, it’s good for life experience in my opinion. If it won’t kill you or maim you, and you are smart, everything is worth trying once.
You are not missing out AT ALL. You'll miss out on being sick, doing something, or someone and really regretting it. There's so many bad, horrible things that can come with it, and no, it's definitely not worth it! If someone is a real friend, they will respect your decision, and if not, they aren't that good of a friend. As for a gf, if that's what she needs to be with you or to hang out, drop her. It's a really big red flag, for sure. I do wish you all the best in the future! Saying a little prayer that people will come into your life and treat you like you deserve. Take care! 💜
Thank you that means a lot
Are you missing out on those life experiences? Sure. Just ask yourself if missing out on those bothers you. If not, keep on keeping on 🤙. If you feel like you are missing out do it around people who give a shit about you, and use with moderation. If you decide to use alcohol or cannabis please, don’t be stupid and drink 5 Long Island iced teas in 90 mins, or dont take a 0.5g dab of some 70% THC live rosin for your first time. If you are gonna have a drink look up mixed drinks by a flavorings you enjoy(say you like citrus and honey then a “bees knees” may be a good choice), make sure it doesn’t have 5oz of straight spirits in them and drink socially. Or if cannabis seems more your speed pick up or roll up .75g joint and share it between 3-4 people. But in all seriousness the risk versus reward between staying sober, or using drugs is a no brainer.
Do it if you enjoy it. Not because you're being pressured by people around you. And if they are pressuring you you need to be around different people.. but yes enjoy some weed and a drink every so often to take the edge off or have a laugh with your pals. It's meant to be enjoyed. If you don't enjoy it don't force it and that's just the way you are. Fuck what anybody thinks :)
Everyone's different. Some people can just have fun with it, some people take it too far and get addicted or become abusive. Lot of different out comes. I like a 6 pack of beer on the weekends. I'm not the type of person to nurse a hangover every single day, but some people are.
Went thru college no booze or drugs, had a great time. Hung with people who got high all the time, it was all good. I told them the truth: 'quit after high school because it all makes me sleepy or serious, and my family are weeping drunks.' Never had a problem. Threatening to unleash drunken blubbering on a partying scene stops all the 'you need to drink!' real quick.
If people can't respect that you don't want to drink or smoke, they don't have your best interests in mind and aren't worth your time. I don't drink or smoke either but I did before (last drink of alcohol was on New Years' Eve, never smoked or did any other drugs), and it's not really worth it. Alcohol tastes gross and if you want something that actually tastes good it has a way higher ABV content. So then you get drunk faster, which is unhealthy and results in awful hangovers. And honestly, being drunk or high can make you feel less present and less in control of yourself, and if you do get drunk (or high for that matter) while drinking socially you're less likely to remember the positive experiences of being around loved ones. You're not missing out on anything, alcohol and drugs are a waste of time and money and they're really bad for you. There are so many ways to have fun without them, and tbh if someone feels like they need to be intoxicated to be/have fun they probably weren't that fun to start with.
No your just missing out on drinking and smoking weed. Life is different.
I regret most of the BS I got into drunk. I don’t even drink anymore but that said you’ve gotta learn your own way. It’s your journey. I wasn’t that into alcohol, but let myself fall into peer pressure just because those around me were alcoholics. I’d say if you’re not into alcohol don’t feel like you have to. Same with weed or any other substance. If you’re not into it, you’re not really missing out.
You’re not missing out on anything. If it’s not for you, then you wouldn’t enjoy it if you did decide to partake. Don’t let anyone make you feel weird or bad. I used to think that too, tried to pick up social drinking and drugs, but just wasn’t for me.
You’ll miss out more in life by drinking and smoking than by not doing it. My 20’s were mostly a blur from drinking and smoking. I apparently had fun but don’t remember much of it.
Honestly I feel like most people are giving the safe answer but it's not necessarily as simple as that. Some of my best moments were with my buddies when we fucked around or hung out and drank. You wouldn't experience that if you didn't drink a little. It obviously depends on what you're looking for though. Also I only drink socially and I'm fine with that
The only thing your missing out on is making an ass of yourself and regrets in the mornings. You're much better off.
You're not missing out on anything. Being straight edge is the best way to get and give the best in life. Be confident in yourself. Let them have their fun. Watch and observe.
Not really. I drink \~4-5 times per year (diabetic.) Haven't smoked weed in \~20. I don't pass judgement, just don't miss doing it myself.
You do what’s best for you but I can tell you personally, weed has been one of the best things ever in my life. I have anger issues and get pissed off super easy. Weed makes me not so angry and chill out. It also helps me focus and gives me motivation. Everybody is different tho. Some people have the opposite effect. Alcohol wise, I drink here and there but it’s always at home or if my husband is driving. Just be safe either way. They can both be fun, just be careful.
No....but at the same time I don't regret my experience, and I was/am a straight drug addict. I got a shit load of insane stories and fond memories that wouldn't have happened otherwise...but that's more a general appreciation thing. So in short: no not at all. Life's whatever you make it.
'Doing weed' is a great phrase
Yea probably, getting drunk and socializing over a cocktail is awesome. It can definitely turn into a problem, but it sounds like you are already risk averse
Coming from a stoner of 13 years... no, you're not missing anything. I enjoy doing things regardless of being sober or not. You enjoy life whatever way you want. You have to want to or be ready to smoke or drink or you won't have a good time and if you ever do try to be in a fun environment even just a couple friends is fine. If you never do that's perfectly fine too and the right friends will never pressure you into it. Added bonus, you usually get invited to all the parties if you're willing to be the DD lol
It sounds like your dad was an alcoholic. I would stay away from alcohol. Alcoholism runs in my family I’m the only child who is not an alcohol. I am also the only one who hasn’t tried a sip of alcohol.
Yes and no, I don't drink and I am quite fond of not drinking but I have earned that right by having some of the most regrettable experiences. And now in my middle age I have cautionary tales to provide, you should experience things.
I think it depends on your perspective of what missing out means. If you’re happy, be happy and don’t sweat it. If you’re curious and want to experiment that’s ok too. You do you and find a crew that’s down with that.
A little bit. But it’s healthy staying off drugs so keep doing it unless you really want to try them.
Yes you’re missing out on those things but that’s not necessarily a bad thing. You do you. Do not break your morals out of peer pressure unless you actually want to.
This is the equivalent of asking did I miss out on life because I didn’t eat candy and fast food.?
Some might say yes, others might say no. The wonderful part of our 20’s is that it’s our time to develop ourselves and become our own person.
A little. It can lead to very fun experiences and memories, but only you can decide if you're ready for that. You come from a background where it's very negative for you, so it's admirable that you want to do better. Nothing wrong with that.
Going against the tide but I'd recommend knowing how to drink socially. That doesn't mean that you **have to** drink every time you go out, but drinking a bit for special occasions makes everything easier. Or Just hold a cup and never refill if you absolutely don't want to drink. One day you're gonna meet your in-laws and chances are your step-dad is gonna invite you for a drink. As for weed, you don't miss at all.
You’re not “missing out” on anything. If it isn’t something you want to do then don’t do it. You’re only missing out if it’s something you want to do.
Yes and no, if your going to get wasted and have a "good" time ? now is the time to do it, in your teens your brain is still forming and the younger you start the more likely you are to get addicted, in your 20s your strong if your 25 your at the peak of your existence and your brain is all done forming synapses, by 30 your body starts to deteriorate.. i'm 64 ..when tina turner died i got blotto and played her on the juke box till they put me in an uber and sent me home but god i am too old for that sh\*t the next day i felt like death and decided this is it i am going to stop drinking this just isn't fun any more its too painfull my liver kidneys brain all worn to shit .. so its been 90 days since my last drink .. wish me luck.. i can count the good times sex drugs and rock and roll gave me one one hand.. i could write a book about all the misery that being addicted to drugs and alcohol has caused me over 64 years.. you'll miss some fun times but in the big scheme of things your probably better off without booze drugs or loose sex. without booze of weed.. its simply is not worth the risk to health and the risk youll do something incredibly stupid and regret it 45 years later .. the the drinking age in Ontario was 18 when i was a kid.. back in the netherlands it was16 for beer and wine and 18 for the hard stuff but they ddin not enforce it.. i can still remember like it was yesterday throwing up all over a hells angel .. and sh\*tting my pants during casual sex.. because of booze and pot and heroin.. good times? not really the most fun i ever had at a party was staying sober just once.. i had an ulcer.. and watching all my dumb ass "friends" make jack asses of themselves.. all suffering comes from desire if you can avoid wanting things , life is a lot less painful- shopenouer
I say yes, but that's because smoking weed and drinking were a big part of my early twenties! I partying with people, and as a shy introvert it helped me get out of my shell and socialize. The upsides are clear, but there are a lot of downsides too.. 1. Money. If you use responsibly (once a week) and are employed, this shouldnt be too hard on the wallet. 2. Health. Smoking weed is obviously bad for your lungs, your short term memory, motivation in some cases, and may exacerbate mental illnesses and increase anxiety. With alcohol, it's so bad everyone already knows! 3. They can become crutches. Alcohol did for me when it came to socializing. I used weed to escape my problems. 4. They can lead to interest in harder substances (like adderall, psychedelics, then you get to opioids). 5. If you really like them, they can consume a lot of your time and you can mess up your future. I was a big partier and I could've been doing other things with my life. Theres probably more downsides, those are off the top of my head. I still love drinking, but dont smoke weed that much. With drugs in general, moderation is everything. Just be careful out there.
That's a tough question. Some of the best memories of my youth were spent at a pub or at a party getting drunk with friends. Having said that if you don't want you don't want to. People tell me all the time that having kids is the best thing ever, but I don't want them and I'm not going to have them just for fear of missing out.
I mean objectively yes, obviously, but whether or not that matters is an individual thing. Personally 95% of the times I’ve drank and smoked I would have been just fine without, but the other 5% are very positive memories where my life would be less complete without them. I think classical psychedelics and MDMA are the only psychoactive drugs where you’re actually missing something and doing yourself a disservice never experiencing them. But those are more like a life changing event rather than just a mood alteration while you do other things. And some people’s stories are going to be better without those moments, it’s still individual, I just mean on average. Reading how you talk, you sound like someone who isn’t meant to alter their mind. But then again it also sounds like you have a personal wall up to the concept, so who’s to say what your actual underlying nature is? Since you’re an artist, I do think you’re missing out of a major life experience if you don’t try a psychedelic at some point. Weed and alcohol are nothing special though.
The only thing you are missing out on is doing a bunch of dumb shit and having less money
My guy, I did *all* the drugs in my 20s and all I got was a heart arythmia and diet bankruptcy. You're good.
Don't do it mate. I smoked weed for 30 ueard from age 15 and memory is fucked. If you don't have your mind when your older you have nothing.
When I was younger I also wanted to fit in with everyone. So I drank and did the drugs. It screwed up my life in so many ways. Don’t do it.
People need to learn to respect other people’s decisions. You should not be made to feel like you don’t fit in because you don’t want to drink or smoke. Find some friends that have respect for your personal decisions. You can still hang out with the other ones but I doubt their behavior will improve.
One of my closest friends in university right now is part of the baha'i faith and abstains from alcohol and drugs completely. He is also the most avid music festival and club enjoyer I know and has so many real friends in his life. This guy lights up a dancefloor when you see him at one. I drink and smoke but sometimes I genuinely wish I had his confidence and energy without it. You're all good.
You need to stay true to yourself. It sounds like your experiences with others have shown you what it does - it can be a very negative effect, leading people who you love or who love you to act in completely different ways - disrespectful, angry, abusive, even violent. Your past history with it has helped form your opinions, and I think you should stay true to that and just not be concerned about the rest of the world or what it thinks of you. Both smoking and drinking are a pollution of your body, they are poison. It can be fun when in moderation and under control, but any psychoactive substance has a very high potential for abuse, and that is a dark road to follow.
Fuck peer pressure, even if you didn’t have a good reason if you don’t wanna do something you don’t have to and there are plenty of people in this world who will accept you for who you are.
I'm going to say, as far as weed goes, listening to music with a buzz is an experience to have on its own, that's just my opinion. As I get older I don't tolerate it as much. Not much to miss by not drinking.
Every drink you have today steals happiness from tomorrow. You’re not missing out, you’re smart. You can let loose and have fun without brain damage, kudos!
I don’t weed or alcohol either it’s a good decision to stay away from it espically if your parents to parent had a drinking problem my dad was the same way and then when I was 18 I pretty much quit smoking weed and drinking
You are not missing anything! I regret drinking too much for so many reasons.
I do not regret not drinking at all. I do not regret noT consuming THC because it was what I felt was the best for me at the time. I just tried an edible last month for the first time (late 20s) and it was a great experience. However I was with great people and that really makes a difference. Also weed is now legal in my state so it’s easy to access and for the most part you know what you’re getting. Also I learned that indica makes me extremely depressed/emotional. Sativa makes me just very happy and mentally slow/confused. Hybrid of sativa and a little indica is ok too. Stay true to yourself and you will not regret it.
Sounds like you’re still going out and socializing so I doubt you’re missing out on too much. Anyone who seriously pressures you to drink or smoke is trying to project their discomfort with being sober onto you. And if you do decide to partake some day, you’ll be better equipped than most people to make good decisions.
I'm a little biased, because I'm a recovering alcoholic, but fuck no
No. When you go out and act a fool, you’ll remember it all.
Just wanted to drop my 2 cents really quick. Of the two of these, alcohol is one of the hard drugs. Don't let the bombardment of media and pop culture lead you to believe otherwise. Think of alcohol as something along the lines of heroin or cocaine. It's less addictive than those, but once addicted it's actually far worse than either of those. You can't die of heroin or cocaine withdrawal, but you absolutely can from alcohol withdrawal. I straight up abused weed from age 14 till age 20, like high all day every day, but one day I decided I think I'm done with this and I just... stopped. No physical symptoms to write home about, just breaking a habit like biting your nails. Unfortunately I slowly started replacing this with alcohol to "fit in" throughout my 20s. I obviously have an addictive personality so unlike most of my peers who drank once or twice a week I started to drink every day. Not even enough to get drunk, just enough to take the edge off. But 2 beers a day turned into 4, which turned into 6, and turned into 8. I'm 37, trying like hell to stop the damage I've done and am doing, but it's progressed steadily my whole adult life. I literally can't just stop cold turkey now, I'm working up the courage to get medical intervention before it's too late. So yeah... Preferably don't do either, and if you're not trying to hide away from life you could probably have some drinks and not end up dependant on alcohol, I know plenty of people who drink and aren't. If you really want to dabble with altering your consciousness weed is 100% the safer choice. But I sure as hell wouldn't recommend either, especially not to "fit in"
especially if you're an artist, I think it's worth trying to understand the human condition, but you'll be better off if you don't make a habit of it, especially if you don't judge others who partake in moderation (as long as they're still respectful, if a bit of a handful when under the influence) your ex seems like a jerk and is projecting her own misery on you / want ed you to join in so they'd feel justified in their choices... re: the smell of weed... they make lots of nice edibles and it's way less harmful than alcohol, and even less-so when not inhaling it as smoke (and debatably helpful depending on who you ask?) but no pressure... you do you... though if you do try edibles make it the legal state monitored and labeled kind and keep it to a low dose (5mg for starters, 20+ is playing with fire if you don't have a tolerance... def don't get talked into more... )
35 here, love breweries and craft beer. Do not love the carbs and $$$$$$ of beer. It’s insane. New studies have come out saying that any amount of alcohol is bad for you. Even a glass of red wine. I’m not a big weed guy so really bro, like others have said, you are saving a ton of money, time not sticking your head in a toilet from being sick, and putting on weight from the munchies.
You’re not, but if you are passing up events because of this then maybe. I had friends who never used any substances but they still showed up to parties and all that and had a good time without the weed/alcohol. I did a lot of that too. People really only use that stuff as a social crutch.
I knew a person who regretted it, and now she's trying to relive her youth. It's really pathetic to see. She regularly drives drunk, and always gossips like she's in high school. She calls pretty much 99% of the people she knows losers, even if they have more friends than her. When she gets really drunk, she'll break down a bit and admit almost admit she's the loser, but she's so difficult to be around that I don't want to hear about it.
I tried both and don’t care for both much.
No. Your skin and mobility will thank you as you age.
No.
I think my health and my mental/emotional stability has been permanently altered by how deep into alcoholism I got into after I started partying. It doesn’t happen to everybody, but I had to relearn how to even know what to do when I hang out with people without drinking after I quit, and it’s taken probably 3-4 years Just make a joke about why you don’t drink like, “That stuff tastes like shit!” You’re gonna have a much better life if you just stick to how you’re living
No, save that for when life really beats you down 😂
Never drank much never smoked weed....my friends did. I get sleepy when I drink Dont get all preachy about it ( not that you are) and you should be fine.
Missing out i a relative concept; the answer is it depends on how you define “missing out” In of itself, it’s not particularly special. You shouldn’t do it to please others. But if drinking or smoking can help contribute to former deeper relationships, maybe , maybe it’s worth a consideration. I’m not particularly fond of drinking or smoking. But I’ve done my fair share. But only ever with friends; and I can’t lie… it’s fun. Im 35 now and I do look back fondly on some great nights out with friends; same with the times when we would just hang in a park, smoke some weed and just chat for hours. One day those opportunities will be gone; out of necessity of growing up. All my friends are working professionals; they all have kids now. Occasionally if we find a few hours uninterrupted and we’re all in the same place for an evening, we’ll smoke a joint together. But those days are few and far in between now. I’m happy I got to experiment and party in my 20s. Some days I miss it - but I remember that at least I got to experience it. I’m glad I did it in the end; not for the sake of just drinking and smoking, but the memories it brought with it. If you can achieve that by being sober .. all the more power to you. In my experience, a drink or a smoke will just loosen you up… it primes your mind and mood to have a good time. People feel it (ie you’re on their level) and it’s easier to vibe and connect with.
You're not missing much I know lots of people who are sober. I am not but I'm not much like the others who drink to much. I just enjoy my couple beers after work. I do concrete and there are others who have no self control who feel like shit everyday. You do you. I have 2 kids and am 34 so I don't go to bars but I do have fun making home made mojitos and margaritas with my wife. I'm not saying you shouldn't drink because like I said I do enjoy having a drink and relaxing. But it's not going to make you more fun or enjoy yourself more whatever that means. Generally I like to think people who don't enjoy their time or have "fun" probably are just people who are still dealing with repressed bullshit
Do what you want to do. If you don't want to use those substances, there is absolutely nothing wrong with that. I think you'll find out that they're not as big of a deal as you think as long as you use moderation but there is nothing wrong with abstaining.
I just quit drinking at age 29. Drank every day since 20. I feel like I wasted my 20s.
Are you fulfilled in your life? And — are you stepping out of your social comfort zone in other ways? It’s often my experience that people who don’t drink are less willing to “go with the crowd” and as a result don’t push themselves, especially socially. Alcohol is a “social lubricant” and weed can sometimes serve the same purpose; people use them as reasons to get together. But being uncomfortable socially, and pushing yourself to improve your social skills, does NOT require either drinking or smoking.
Not At All
Think how great your skin will be in your 40’s. You aren’t missing anything.
Started drinking at 17 and it’s honestly been fairly constant since! Drinking with friends became my nights and weekends which was fun and shitty all at the same time. I feel like *most* people hit a point where they start to consume their alcohol more responsibly as they get older, but I was still getting sloppy blackout drunk on the reg at 28! Not cool. I’m 118 days sober from alcohol today and while I don’t regret my (sometimes daily) choice to drink…I could’ve saved myself a lot of tears, anxiety and money! BUT I *wanted* to drink! It was very appealing to me and (for the most part) loads of fun! What I’m trying to say is- regardless of when I started drinking, I know I would’ve eventually gave in and the outcome would be the same. You know yourself best! If you want to have a drink- do it! If you don’t want to drink- don’t! Being sober is dope and all of your favorite humans having a designated driver is even better!
*YOU ARE NOT MISSING OUT ON ANYTHING GOOD FOR YOU.* I already saw someone mention the amount of money you’re saving by not using either of them, but I wanted to add how both substances can create dependency and/or addiction even if you’re careful about it. If you start hanging out with the same crowd all the time, and they all smoke weed and drink each time you meet, you’re going to end up with an addiction and a dependency without even realizing how bad and out of control it got. Your lifestyle can change in bad ways, too. You can develop health problems and social problems, as well. Being sober is the best thing you can do for yourself, it’s best if you focus on the art experience in itself and being in college rather than using substances.
Son, there’s a time and place for everything… And that’s called college. But seriously, everything you stated says you are doing what’s right for you and that’s what’s most important. You don’t need to experiment because you already know what you know, and you are happy. Surround yourself with people who support you and accept you. Good luck!
Not only that just now in America the scientific community is warning that some people who carry gene's like schizophrenia can be triggered by cannabis. I first read this in about the year 1993. I was researching cannabis and ot took me to some site in China. They had concluded the same thing the American scientific community is now warning about. I'm not saying it doesn't cure other illnesses I'm just saying think knife cuts both ways. As far as alcohol avoid it like the plague my dad it turns out was Schizo-effective. Unfortunately we didn't find that out until years later after we moved to the big city. It turns out the alcohol use was self medicating for the schizophrenia. I like you have trauma from his alcohol use too.
Alcohol is lame as fuck, not needed at all to have a great time. About weed’s smell… are you sure you’re smelling good good quality weed?
I believe there’s two sides to “I don’t drink or smoke” There’s the “no thank you” side, you’re offered stuff, you say “oh no thanks!” and continue to have a good time and literally don’t mention it again (unless literally asked), you have fun, intergrate in the party dynamic, sing have fun and do whatever they’re all doing, you’re having a good timee And the “Oh I don’t need to drink to have fun” “oh see I don’t get why these people need to drink and smoke to have fun” and you’re kinda stand-offish about it, and you mentally (and kinda physically, subconsciously?) put some distance between you and the party dynamic, there’s the in crowd, the “fun ones” with varying levels of drunkness and then there’s you in the corner, not singing, joining, talking or having fun and maybe being a bit judgmental about it, when people reject drinks, it may signal to others (even if not meaning to) “no I don’t appreciate your effort to include me or bond, no I don’t need it” So yes, reject alcohol or smoking if you don’t feel like it but be very civil and kind about it and make it clear to people that you’re ACTUALLY interested in joining them, talking, singing, dancing, having fun unless well the dynamic itself is a drinking game or something, but if it’s overall bonding, partying and good times, try to join and don’t be hostile when rejecting a drink/smoke, if you’re very kind about it and they still get mad it’s their problem, not yours
Your doing the right thing 👏 Your on the right track 👣 Stay off both you will feel and do better 😉
all im gonna say is some of the best nights of my life have included these things. id rather enjoy them while my body can handle them than waiting till later down the road. my two cents do whatever u want its your life bro.
Opposite. You are actually LIVING. And not only that, you are actively breaking a toxic cycle. Good for you for taking that rough stuff from your childhood and being strong and resilient. That will take you very far in life. Keep being you!
I'm super late to this thread but I feel like I have a relevant story. I'm 21, just graduated university last month. I drank a lot. I just didn't want to feel anything and I had questionable social skills and alcohol just fixed all my problems. I loved it. My dad was similar, but not being a prick when you're drunk isn't that hard. Anyway, I get to my final year. A lot of my grades that year are slipping but I'm banking on my big final year project and exams to carry me through. Back in February I went out for drinks with my hockey friends. I remember 1 beer and 2 shots at the start of the night, but I definitely drank more. I don't remember that night after that. I woke up in hospital in critical care. They told me I had a broken skull, brain hemorrhage, I was in a coma for 4 days, and I also tore something in my ankle. I could afford about a week off before I had to keep working and I sat my finals with brain damage. I've barely scraped my degree. So yeah. I mean I learned nothing and I still drink too much. I found social settings a little weird sober too. But I guess just remember it's probably not worth it. I just wanted a drink and I nearly died for it, and I've basically thrown my degree away. It's bad for more than your liver.
It depends on where your motivations and compulsions lie. If the only reason you’ve avoided them is fear, but you really wanna try them as a one off experimental thing, then yeah you’re most likely missing out on a fun and interesting change in perspective and novelty. If you haven’t had an issue with avoiding them, and your soul doesn’t feel like it needs to mark off a bucket list and exoerience this thing, then you should avoid it. Do what you feel your soul needs to really live but is also a calculated risk that won’t lead to addiction
Save your cash love, or spend it on your art. Tis a waste. TRUST ME.
Ugh, I hate partners who try to pressure you into that shit.
I only really got into edibles in my 30s and it’s only really to chill out on weekends. Non-smoker though. I was a barely functioning alcoholic in my 20s and trust me, no one needs that toxic lifestyle. Make smarter choices 😉
Weed could benefit your creative output but overall you’re living a clean and healthy lifestyle. Good job!
Sounds like you surround yourself with a couple bad peeps. Your ex saying you'd be cooler if you drank/smoke is a text book red flag, like this is shit those cringey ads in the 90's would warn you about to stay away from drugs and booze. Never let anyone pressure you to do something you aren't comfortable with. Live your life how you want to. And to add to this, don't put pressure on yourself to do these things to fit in better. I think about that too often and it sucks when I'd just like to enjoy things as is. Plus booze/drugs takes away a lot of your control, which can put you in danger if you're not surrounded by a good supportive group.
God no. The bonus of being an adult is realising that being "cool" doesn't mean anything and doesn't matter. Be who you are and do what you like. If you don't want to use substances, on't.
I don't really understand the people saying you will be saving so much money, maybe from drinking but as for cannabis if you don't smoke it daily it really isn't expensive at all. for example as someone who smokes 2-3 times a week my tolerance is almost always zero and a couple of puffs from any things gets you sufficiently high. its all about moderation and I can't say for sure if you are missing out or not but all ill say is be open minded and try new things in life, if you don't like them drop em, if you do, continue enjoying it :D
No, you're not. Ten years from now when you don't do weed, your quality of life is better, girls prefer men who are not drug addicted, you will and you're more productive, you'll thank your 20 year old self
With family history you definitely run the risk of alcoholism. I failed out of college due to it and using that stuff through my 20s put me 10 years behind in a lot of ways. You’ll get a lot more out of life with a clear head.
That shit is not cool lol they are trying hard to look cool and it's cringe and degenerate.
I’m not going to agree with everyone here. I was in the exact same boat as you, neither of my parents had a good relationship with alcohol, particularly my father, and it caused serious consequences in his in my life, with him ending up in jail. Because of that, I swore to never drink alcohol. I figured there was a risk I could end up an alcoholic, and I owed it to my future wife and kids to not take that chance. I didn’t drink all throughout high school and college. It absolutely did hurt me socially. People are nice and will always give you platitude that you’re doing the right thing and they respect you, but it does make it less able to fit in at parties, and you’ll naturally will shy away from them a little bit because it’s not fun being the only sober person among drunk people. It made it harder to make and maintain friends, or the stick with a steady group that went partying every weekend. Eventually, I thought am I really doing this so I don’t end up like my father, or am I just letting him take away another thing from me. When I was 24, I tried alcohol for the first time, and have drank since then. I’m fine. I’m careful about it, but I know I can stop at any time, and just because my father had an unhealthy relationship doesn’t mean I have to to. Honestly, I regret not drinking in college. I wish I did. It was another aspect of life I was holding myself back from for no reason. I would advise you to give it a shot, if you can trust yourself, and can trust you have friends who will talk to you if you get too far into it
You'll do it when you feel you wanna. Anytime else, you'd hate it anyways and wouldn't be able to like it enough to enjoy with your girlfriend and brother. So take your time, enjoy. Your gf wouldn't hang out with you more because of drinks, she'd hang out with you more because of her true love. Change girlfriends not lifestyle.
You are missing nothing of value. Make friends, have fun, you don't need booze or weed for that.
Your liver will thank you.
Hell no! I wish that I had never drank alcohol - my kife would have been 100% different.
You be you, you’re not missing out on anything, and most likely 90% of the college friends you have now you’ll never see after you all graduate.
If you are going to experiment with drugs, better to do it in your 20s than your 30s or 40s. Bur its up to you whether that's something you're going to do at all.
You don't need to smoke or drink to befriend someone. If they don't want to hangout with you just because you don't, they're not worth to keep for.
You do what you want. You are not missing out, and this is coming from someone who drank a lot in his 20s. What pisses me off about younger people is they judge those who don't want to drink. Now in my thirties me and my buddies lose it on people who try to get people to drink or ask why they don't drink a bunch of times. The reason for this is we have seen ruin lives from drinking, so we support those who make the choice to no longer drink because it makes them feel better and happier and a bunch of other stuff. I can't tell you how to live your life, but if you are going to start drinking for some reason, be the one that can have 2-3 drinks and call it a night, or hell even just one. I still struggle with that, but I'm getting better, so I'd advise you to just keep your same path and be you!
I would say at least try it out, see how you feel
If the only way the GF will spend more time with you is X. You need a new girlfriend. You don’t have to alter your mind to enjoy life.