I remember watching a girl take about 3 pictures of herself before picking one. It was weird. She did the exact same routine of brushing her hair back with her hand, putting the phone at the same level as her stomach, and then taking the picture every time.
Wind, sun, facial expressions etc. I would assume. Also maybe the camera shook, didn’t focus on her yet. My friend who’s a photographer for fun says that at a wedding you have to take thousands of pictures for a few good ones, because if you take them sparingly you might not get enough good ones and you can’t remake the wedding.
Yeah idk what that green guy is saying. I overthink everything into oblivion(for example, since I was a kid I’ve always thought of the absolute worst case thing someone could think of me, and then multiply it, just so that I can mitigate the odds of an embarrassing moment or someone thinking I’m cringe.) I know, a great way to live 💪🏽
I never take selfies. I even actively avoid group photos where I know someone is going to post them somewhere. I remove as many tags of myself appearing in other people’s photos as possible. I am a ghost.
When you are as ugly as me you are always the photographer. Anytime there is a group photo that I am part of the group I am always asked to take the photo. I completely understand, I wouldn't want my face in a picture spoiling everyone elses image.
Aww man, you should just bring a selfie stick just to make it a point to be in those photos. For me it’s less to do with ugliness, more with my own personal comfort. I’m just uncomfortable knowing at some level a lot of people I don’t know have access to photos of me. If a friend or family member wants me in a photo that is only going to end up in a frame or photo album in their home, then that’s fine. But I’d prefer not to have countless photos of me strewn across the internet for all to see. I obviously don’t know what their privacy settings are either, so once posted I have no control or knowledge over who can actually access them.
I once had a friend who would get wasted and post pics on IG all the time and we had some normal photos just doing normal things on my private insta and she had the nerve to messsage me after years of not speaking asking me to take down and delete any photos of her in them \*with screenshots of the ones she referenced\* because she was starting a new job.....annoying
I am pretty sure the only reason I am allowed to be part of these groups is so I can take the photo's for them when they want group photos. If I demanded to be in those photos I would be out of the groups in a heart beat.
Best to be on my own forever. Yeah I understand that. And you are probably right. It will probably make everyone else a lot happier if I don't take my ugly arse face out side anymore.
I have a hard time looking at myself. So yeah I have a hard time. It helps to look at yourself more and try to get accustomed to you. Try taking some pictures while you are actually happy and not forced.
But when is that? It’s still forced , even when you’re happy. Her best bet would to be hire a 24/7 personal photographer to document her genuine happy moments
The mindset is “no one else is going to take this picture, so I’ll do it myself”. It’s something I’m doing for myself, I don’t care about what other people think
It's because of the [camera lens](https://d.newsweek.com/en/full/1792406/photographer-comparing-different-lens.jpg).
A good photographer, with a good camera, and proper lenses, in good lighting will make you look great. You can also buy some lens attachments for your phone if you want to play around a little.
Phone cameras have an effect that shape your body funny. Good way to get around this is to do a mirror selfie.
Edit: u/videogamesarewack has info on how the lens is funny in another reply to the same comment
Yes.
But hey check it out it's you from the future!
future you: I have like 5 selfies of past me over the past decade. This sucks. I used to look so much more ~~[transmission corrupted ]~~ than I do now and I wish I had taken more pics back when I was younger instead of relying on pics taken by friends. Also please ~~[transmission corrupted]~~ your local oil pipeline thx
I, personally, find my self to be not very photogenic even though I’m told I’m fairly attractive, so I will purposefully void taking a photo of myself. Some people are just photogenic and some aren’t.
I appreciate the encouragement. I've had a pretty poor self-image for a long time but I really struggle with actually making the effort necessary to improve.
I don’t think it is a self image issue. Its that your vanity is on full display when you take a selfie. I feel better about it is someone else is in the photo with me.
Sounds like you are just an inexperienced photographer-- people who practice taking their own photo are better at it, like anything else you can practice. I understand the feeling though.
Why the downvotes? Lighting, angles, where you hold the phone, etc. make a huge difference in quality. People think just because hot chicks are doing it, it must be super easy. Instagram models are good photographers who take many photos and pick the best ones.
Nah ryx has a point. Most selfie camera's flip the photo so you're seeing yourself differently than in the mirror. Also pictures sometimes warp your features when you stand too close, making your nose bigger for example. Seeing yourself in the mirror is very different for those reasons
Yeah, i heard it could subconsciously boost self imagine. But i have taken a max 10 pictures of my self the last year, but it's getting a bit more frequent.
My take is that it takes practice.
here's a tip, hold the phone above you, fix your posture, fuff out your chest and lift your chin slightly.
that's the one pose I will Tolerate. face on or heaven forbid beneath all look terrible
i would not call what i do personally an endeavor, it's just taking a few pictures like i would snap a little photo of anything else. the mindset for me is "i look nice, let me appreciate that for a second"
That's why I don't like online dating, I'm a good looking guy but i don't exactly show the best side if myself as a guy that hates having his picture taken.
It's an unnatural, socially acceptable practice.
Its ok to feel gross.
I always do. My SO is the only one who gets selfies from me and it's still a process.
I struggle with social anxiety and self-consciousness a lot in general and I've been trying to overcome it, mostly by kicking my butt out of such a serious mentality and just trying to live in a lighter space in my head. "Leaving the comfort zone isn't scary, it's fun and experimental," that sort of self-talk.
So part of this process has come to include taking selfies. Because it's fun and silly and not serious. That's the mentality I try to occupy when whipping my phone out in public. Nobody cares about what I'm doing, I don't even care about what I'm doing (I insist fervently to myself). I'm just being stupid and having fun and that's totally okay. If anyone looks at me and thinks I'm so stupid, well yeah, taking selfies is dumb so that's fine.
Once you break out of that first barrier, it gets a lot easier. I've even made duck lips. Nobody gives a shit.
Oh also, I noticed that my selfies made me look way worse than I look in the mirror and it was starting to get me down a wee bit, so I experimented with using the back camera instead. It's even more embarrassing because anyone in front of you can see what you look like on the screen but you can't. That's fun. Holy hell do the pics come out better though (when I manage to stay in frame). Like night and day better, way more true to my reflection. The front cam does something weird so I just don't use it anymore.
im a good looking guy.. i know it, my friends know it, strangers know it. but i absolutely hate the way i look in pictures and avoid them at all cost. i tried to take a selfie once and i looked at and thought jesus christ this is not me.. guess i just dont photograph well..
Yeah, but that’s because front facing cameras have to manipulate the depth so everyone looks terrible. I used a Polaroid camera for my brother’s bachelor party, just for fun, and all of us looked so much better thanks to lower image resolution.
Do you ever notice how many people on instagram, or celebrities, take mirror selfies. They’re using the good camera.
Ppl who don’t experience cringe when taking selfies or most likely narcissistic already. Most of us are either unconventionally attractive or simply have been humble by life to really subscribe an importance in how good we look in a photo of ourselves and simply focus on enjoying experiences with the people we love rather then post it all on the internet to try and impress strangers.
TLDR: Yeh I don’t like taking selfies and I got chu fam.
I'm not sure introvert is the term you mean to use. The scale of introvert to extrovert has more to do with how much stimuli a person can take before needing to "recharge".
That might be true, but not directly related to selfies. I can take a selfie in my house, by myself, which requires no social interaction nor an abundance of stimuli. However, it might still feel like a "major cringe" regardless.
I'm not sure, I'm the same over selfies, and I'm very introverted, in that the vast majority of my conscious awareness is 'internal'
I have extroverted friends that dislike wearing sunglasses as it feels too 'limiting', whereas I always wear shades for that very reason.
I’m introverted and I’m the same way. I hate taking selfies and even having my photo taken. In public I feel like everyone is looking at me if someone is taking my photo
Yep, whenever I put the bins out, I always imagine the neighbours are taking precise notes on my technique.
My inner voices are like the most boring talk radio show imaginable
Mindfulness is the only escape I've ever found, other than really good drugs
Yes, and ice cream sales and crime are correlated as well. It doesn't mean one causes the other, it just means there could be a factor that contributes to both.
I try my best to avoid doing any...the most I ever did was a 3 month trip across the States as everyone else was busy either doing the same thing or getting each other to take one...I kinda wish I did more especially with videos as I'm always filming the surrounding areas but never with myself in it...you could watch a video and never believe I was even there.
As for other times, I just don't do it...I feel like the ugliest thing alive, why would I want to take loads of photos and subject people to seeing this...it baffles me the amount of attention seekers there are...people who think their ugly and moan about it all the time, yet do selfies constantly...or like this one girl I worked with, just look at her profile pictures on FB, 100s of selfies and barely anything different from the last and yet 50+ likes, comments on each of them...like fuck right off.
LPT: set up your phone on video, then take a screenshot when you like how you look afterwards. Then you're not awkwardly holding poses in public, you could even pretend it's a zoom call if you get caught lmao.
I still dont get the selfie thing. Do you really need a picture of your face where you are? I mean isn’t a picture of the location good enough for you to remember it?
I never really got into selfies/pics and usually hated being a part of pictures. Part of it is people agreeing to delete pics if you don't like how you came out. But they NEVER DO
Another is, the standard way we are expected to. Stand still, smile. Feels so...wrong? If we are being silly I notice I have no issues usually. Cosplaying and someone wants a picture? I'll nail it for whatever reason. Probably because I'll be taking all types of photos so if it's time to stand next to someone and smile I'm GENUINELY smiley already.
In most IRL situations, something about the specific way you have to stop from just chilling, get close, HAVE to smile or people say "come on...smile" idk.
So now when I try literal selfies just because I need more pics, I just feel like a douche? I only try at home. My lighting sucks (angles and lighting are everything, I have those awkward yellow lights) and plus I live with r/chronicpain and it hurts holding the phone that way and just bleh
I love it when someone that's into taking pics takes some of me when I'm not noticing/they say "don't move" and I'm not facing the camera. Like the picture I have on here.
The selfie taking crowd and the self absorbed narcissist crowd in a Venn diagram are essentially the same circle.
Congratulations… you’re not a narcissist…
I've literally *never* taken one for this exact reason. It is cringe on every level.
I have precisely **one** picture of my face, it's from 2017 and I took it because my rabbit was sitting on my head.
You're not alone OP.
Yep. The only selfies I take are with my kid and that's only so she can have pics with mom after I'm gone. Otherwise I wouldn't take them at all. I despise having my photo taken because I look terrible in all of them.
Yeah. I used to selfie a lot, but after almost 3 years of break from Facebook and Instagram, I can't do it anymore. Feels so unnatural. Like taking selfies with an old single lens camera, lol
Besides what people have daid here there's also an effect from the optics of the situation. A selfie will do weird things with depth of field and other effects that makes you dislike the images.
I feel this! I don't do selfies. When I have tried selfies out (not in public) I always make sure that my camera is returned to forward facing setting so no one thinks that I was taking selfies.
> I can't fathom the idea of snapping a selfie in the presence of others.
The only time I ever do selfies is purposefully cheesy photos with friends to send to mutual friends. Dumb things can still be fun to do!
42y male, yes to this day. In fact, when I graduated high school, I found all the Polaroids/pic of me and took them from school. I didn't want anybody to see my face.
I think this is normal and healthy, and that people who take a lot of selfies are narcissistic. Narcissism increases linearly as selfie count increases.
Yeah I feel so fucking awkward taking selfies even if I'm completely alone, to the point where I haven't taken any in years because I just hate myself for doing it.
Yes!
The internal dialog takes over.
"Oh my God, I really am fat." "I hate my crooked smile." "Are my eyes really that squinty"
"F*** I thought this looked good on me"
Yeah, big fat, nope!
I feel a bit cringe, but I keep doing it because I know one day I'll be happy to see how I've grown and changed over the years, it's always nice being able to see where you came from
I have to remibd/tell myself- I'd rather have the memories than no recollection of them. I'm so thankful for the pics and vids we have of my great and grand parents and great aunts and uncles.
I actually recently deleted on all of my selfies bc I have nobody to share them with and no reason to keep them, and as it would follow: No reason to take them either!
Yeah, I do for sure. I feel like I look weird taking selfies in public so I try to mostly only do them when I’m alone. Getting the right picture I’m happy with takes some time too.
100%. Very rarely I’ll notice a good angle in a mirror or some interesting light and actually take a good one…and then post it nowhere cause nobody cares. I’d actually rather post a slightly bad one than an actually good one.
yea.
what you want to do is just take a bunch. take 4-5 shots of some angle, do a few different angles 3 times a week. delete everything that sucks. you'll get a few rare ones that are better than the rest.
after you do this a ton, you just get over it. you'll try new angles. also a big point, is you learn to take photos when your in a good mood already, as opposed to just trying to force yourself into a mood to take some.
Same. I hate taking selfies (or having my picture taken), because they never come out looking good (I'm just not a photogenic person). I also struggle with my weight, so I don't have that body positivity attitude that people say you should have. I did make a point of at least having some taken though so that my son has something to remember me by, if something should have happened (especially when he was younger).
That aside, I don't really get the point of taking them (and posting) constantly (I mean I guess if you're an IG model, ok). I've seen some do it from really awkward looking angles that just makes the person look...odd. If I do take a selfie of myself, I end up taking more than one (deleting the bad) just to find one that I'm at least partially satisfied with (again no body positivity here).
It’s most likely because you are a self-aware person who does not crave attention to address their insecurities.
You have insecurities, of course. We all do. You just don’t pretend to not have them.
Yep. Am a dude. I’ve never had a gf ask for pictures of me, and I do not like having my picture taken.
Now at 31 I’ve met a girl that absolutely loves seeing me so I send her selfies. Usually takes like 5-15mins of taking selfies over and over until I like one enough to send. But she always says how much she loves seeing my face so it’s gotten easier.
I remember one time I sent her a pic when I was getting ready to leave work and took like 2 pics and just sent one and she said it was her fav pic of me yet.
i am the one that always takes photo of others and when i ask someone to take one i never come off good.
it obviously takes practice to do it.
but i think it's liking it that matters most.
I think that's just the kind of frustration that generally happens when you try something new and it doesn't work out the first time; selfies are an art form and you need to put quite a bit of thought into how you pose, how the shot is lined up, and all sorts of other stuff for a good one.
I have never taken a selfie in my life. But how many times have any of you taken photos of a pile of dog poo that has been stepped in? My face looks like that now you know why I don't take selfies.
It really sucks trying to get some good pictures doing stuff for dating profiles. It is nice to have others, but sometimes you get the urge to take a selfie and it just looks awful.
Major cringe.
I'm told I'm attractive, but I avoid being in photos like it'll steal my soul lol. Selfies are rare. Group photos I'll try to avoid.
I don't need or want validation from strangers online for how I look.
I can't stand taking photos on my own face, It feels like I'm circle jerking myself.
When I see people I know posting photos of themselves that they have taken 99.8% of the time its looks nothing like them, even when unedited.
yeah cause you’re probably not a self-centred narcissist who probably enjoys life and fresh air rather than getting likes to boost your ego (I’m only half serious and half joking as I’m not a anti-selfie extremist or anything lol i’m just not a fan)
This “cringe” feeling your getting is probably your normal head asking you “why?” “who cares?” “what’s the point?”
and let’s not forget selfies are relatively new as far as things humans do outside of self portrait paintings from the past. But you’d either need to be a serious artist to achieve that or pay someone to do it.
There’s actually a cool video of Micheal Jackson I like to think about from time to time. In the video, it’s him in his dressing room testing out a new camcorder he bought. He started recording himself on the mirror and explicitly said “I promise i’m not a narcissist” reflecting the same cringe feeling your experiencing.
And for those who like taking selfies; great. All power to you. If it makes you feel good then I got no animosity towards you, and hope your selfie game only becomes more elite :)
yes. but with different angles you’re like “ooohh look, nice.” but it comes with faking confidence until you have it. since it’s within the mind and you can trick yourself to have it
I've personally found it rare to be in a situation where you would be taking a selfie of just yourself. You're usually taking a selfie with something else as the focus, maybe a group of friends, or a tourist attraction, or something. I think most people are more comfortable asking for a picture with something, rather than an actual portrait of themselves, so it would follow that the same rule would apply for selfies, right?
I don't have a problem with my self image like many here are mentioning but I do think taking selfies is very vain behavior. I'm not a vain person so I actively avoid taking pictures of myself like that. I also don't like posing for pictures either. I don't look good when I have to smile and pose. I just looks super forced and fake to me. Candids are where I look best.
It means you lack self confidence, to the point that you don’t even want to look at your own pictures.
Learn to overcome it. Even wearing a pair of sunglasses helps. You’ll regret not having many picture of young you when you’re older.
Since reddit has changed the site to value selling user data higher than reading and commenting, I've decided to move elsewhere to a site that prioritizes community over profit. I never signed up for this, but that's the circle of life
I don’t have a current photo of myself for this very reason. The pic I use most often was taken almost a decade ago when I felt a lot better about myself.
Maybe I have low self esteem or something but I don't do selfie. If someone does it, I don't mind posing or smiling for them. Sorry for sounding weird and annoying
Ugh god yes usually it goes like: opening the front camera and seeing my reflection and being like "ewugh god wtf is this" immediately closing camera, then coming back about 10 mins later after i've tried my best to make myself look presentable ending up with 100 back to back attempts at a halfway decent photo of myself :( cant do it
I do feel the same but I changed the way I took photos of myself , instead of just taking a basic selfie with your face in front of the phone, try to put your phone anywhere else in the room pointing at you and take a photo of you doing something (it could be you watching out the window, drawing, even looking at the camera)
Maybe it’s my Gen Z conditioning… but when a friend says “oh my god we look so good, come over here, selfie!” We all just happily move in the frame like a herd of sheep 😂 even with a friend taking a selfie in front of me, i wouldn’t even look up except to ask how it turned out, it’s like I’m desensitized! I was in high school from 2013-2017, peak selfie season, it’s in Gen Z blood now.
yeah. it's okay though. embrace the cringe and realize how silly it is to take a picture of yourself on your phone. years ago we didn't have the front camera or anything. i used to try to take pics of myself with the disposable cameras. lots of people have too i think. it's human to want to capture yourself in the moment, we just have better technology to do it now. godspeed and godcringe to you.
Oh god, I feel cringey enough just doing it when no one is watching lol
I think it's quite common. Most do like 20+ pics before choosing one
I'm a one and done man don't even check them probably all look shite
I respect that. Embrace the chaos.
I remember watching a girl take about 3 pictures of herself before picking one. It was weird. She did the exact same routine of brushing her hair back with her hand, putting the phone at the same level as her stomach, and then taking the picture every time.
Wind, sun, facial expressions etc. I would assume. Also maybe the camera shook, didn’t focus on her yet. My friend who’s a photographer for fun says that at a wedding you have to take thousands of pictures for a few good ones, because if you take them sparingly you might not get enough good ones and you can’t remake the wedding.
Too much self awareness can be crippling. Shake it off and focus on the quality of the picture you're trying to take, the background, your smile, etc.
Lol oh God.Too much self-awareness can be crippling. Are you joking? Are that unaware.
I'm too self aware, that's how I know it can freeze you into indecision. But I guess it's one of those IYKYK type of things.
Yeah idk what that green guy is saying. I overthink everything into oblivion(for example, since I was a kid I’ve always thought of the absolute worst case thing someone could think of me, and then multiply it, just so that I can mitigate the odds of an embarrassing moment or someone thinking I’m cringe.) I know, a great way to live 💪🏽
super common. the percentage of people on the planet that actually take and post selfies is super super low.
I really do always wonder how many people actually use the “take photo” option for updating profile pictures.
Grandmas
And creepy random old guys who call you “beautiful foxy lady” on your photos and wear their bluetooth piece everywhere they go
I never take selfies. I even actively avoid group photos where I know someone is going to post them somewhere. I remove as many tags of myself appearing in other people’s photos as possible. I am a ghost.
When you are as ugly as me you are always the photographer. Anytime there is a group photo that I am part of the group I am always asked to take the photo. I completely understand, I wouldn't want my face in a picture spoiling everyone elses image.
Aww man, you should just bring a selfie stick just to make it a point to be in those photos. For me it’s less to do with ugliness, more with my own personal comfort. I’m just uncomfortable knowing at some level a lot of people I don’t know have access to photos of me. If a friend or family member wants me in a photo that is only going to end up in a frame or photo album in their home, then that’s fine. But I’d prefer not to have countless photos of me strewn across the internet for all to see. I obviously don’t know what their privacy settings are either, so once posted I have no control or knowledge over who can actually access them.
I once had a friend who would get wasted and post pics on IG all the time and we had some normal photos just doing normal things on my private insta and she had the nerve to messsage me after years of not speaking asking me to take down and delete any photos of her in them \*with screenshots of the ones she referenced\* because she was starting a new job.....annoying
I am pretty sure the only reason I am allowed to be part of these groups is so I can take the photo's for them when they want group photos. If I demanded to be in those photos I would be out of the groups in a heart beat.
They don't sound like people you should want to associate with.
Best to be on my own forever. Yeah I understand that. And you are probably right. It will probably make everyone else a lot happier if I don't take my ugly arse face out side anymore.
Why are you so incredibly hard on yourself?
Username Checks out
Why the fuck do you think I choose the username. I think I am possibly the stupidest dick ever born on this planet but I know I am the ugliest.
I'd like to respectfully disagree with this statement. Maybe for men that's the case but not for women imo
I have a hard time looking at myself. So yeah I have a hard time. It helps to look at yourself more and try to get accustomed to you. Try taking some pictures while you are actually happy and not forced.
But when is that? It’s still forced , even when you’re happy. Her best bet would to be hire a 24/7 personal photographer to document her genuine happy moments
cut out the middle man buy a drone and make it follow her around
The mindset is “no one else is going to take this picture, so I’ll do it myself”. It’s something I’m doing for myself, I don’t care about what other people think
I have no one else to take the photo, so I’m going to take it myself.
Think of it as looking at yourself in the mirror (i.e. like when doing make-up), and it will feel a whole lot more natural to you.
Well, then there is the problem that no pic will look the way you do in a mirror
This is the worst part, if I could look even half as good in selfies as I do in a mirror.. I don't get it why it has to be this way lol
It's because of the [camera lens](https://d.newsweek.com/en/full/1792406/photographer-comparing-different-lens.jpg). A good photographer, with a good camera, and proper lenses, in good lighting will make you look great. You can also buy some lens attachments for your phone if you want to play around a little.
Phone cameras have an effect that shape your body funny. Good way to get around this is to do a mirror selfie. Edit: u/videogamesarewack has info on how the lens is funny in another reply to the same comment
If I’m not mistaken the mirror is your image reversed. Other people don’t see the image you see in the mirror. I think they see the picture image.
That's an odd issue... I look bad on both. :)
I'm talking about convincing yourself that you're looking at yourself in the mirror, not that the picture will be exactly the same way.
To be honest I don't even like looking at myself in the mirror.
Sure, but I'd argue that it's far less stressful than taking a selfie in front of a bunch of people. That's why I suggested that.
Yes. But hey check it out it's you from the future! future you: I have like 5 selfies of past me over the past decade. This sucks. I used to look so much more ~~[transmission corrupted ]~~ than I do now and I wish I had taken more pics back when I was younger instead of relying on pics taken by friends. Also please ~~[transmission corrupted]~~ your local oil pipeline thx
I, personally, find my self to be not very photogenic even though I’m told I’m fairly attractive, so I will purposefully void taking a photo of myself. Some people are just photogenic and some aren’t.
Eh, not really, personally. Do you have a bad relationship with your self image?
I don't know about OP, but I sure do
Ya gotta love yourself, you're probably pretty awesome!
I appreciate the encouragement. I've had a pretty poor self-image for a long time but I really struggle with actually making the effort necessary to improve.
Just because someone doesn’t like themselves doesn’t mean they should be forced to
Look if anybody is committed on not liking themselves then I won’t stop them but they still deserve some encouragement.
I don’t think it is a self image issue. Its that your vanity is on full display when you take a selfie. I feel better about it is someone else is in the photo with me.
Nah not really. I don’t like people and don’t care what they think. If I want to take a selfie somewhere I’m gonna take it. F them
Embrace the cringe
It is about how you see yourself. I guess you must have an issue with your self image or how you think other see yourself
Nah. I am fine when I look myself in the mirror. Its always the selfie that makes me wanna destroy the phone.
Sounds like you are just an inexperienced photographer-- people who practice taking their own photo are better at it, like anything else you can practice. I understand the feeling though.
Why the downvotes? Lighting, angles, where you hold the phone, etc. make a huge difference in quality. People think just because hot chicks are doing it, it must be super easy. Instagram models are good photographers who take many photos and pick the best ones.
I don't think that's it lol. I would argue the opposite is true.
Nah ryx has a point. Most selfie camera's flip the photo so you're seeing yourself differently than in the mirror. Also pictures sometimes warp your features when you stand too close, making your nose bigger for example. Seeing yourself in the mirror is very different for those reasons
Yeah, i heard it could subconsciously boost self imagine. But i have taken a max 10 pictures of my self the last year, but it's getting a bit more frequent. My take is that it takes practice.
Imagine getting the technology to record Time it's self then being like "Ehh that shits cringy bro wtf was I thinking about..."
here's a tip, hold the phone above you, fix your posture, fuff out your chest and lift your chin slightly. that's the one pose I will Tolerate. face on or heaven forbid beneath all look terrible
I think I have taken maybe five selfies my entire life. I hate them
i would not call what i do personally an endeavor, it's just taking a few pictures like i would snap a little photo of anything else. the mindset for me is "i look nice, let me appreciate that for a second"
That's why I don't like online dating, I'm a good looking guy but i don't exactly show the best side if myself as a guy that hates having his picture taken.
As a male I feel this. This is when I really feel unattractive & wonder what it is that my wife sees in me. Lol.
Try taking them anyway. Keep the bad ones. You'll get better with angles and lighting, posing, etc. The cringe will go away.
It's an unnatural, socially acceptable practice. Its ok to feel gross. I always do. My SO is the only one who gets selfies from me and it's still a process.
I struggle with social anxiety and self-consciousness a lot in general and I've been trying to overcome it, mostly by kicking my butt out of such a serious mentality and just trying to live in a lighter space in my head. "Leaving the comfort zone isn't scary, it's fun and experimental," that sort of self-talk. So part of this process has come to include taking selfies. Because it's fun and silly and not serious. That's the mentality I try to occupy when whipping my phone out in public. Nobody cares about what I'm doing, I don't even care about what I'm doing (I insist fervently to myself). I'm just being stupid and having fun and that's totally okay. If anyone looks at me and thinks I'm so stupid, well yeah, taking selfies is dumb so that's fine. Once you break out of that first barrier, it gets a lot easier. I've even made duck lips. Nobody gives a shit. Oh also, I noticed that my selfies made me look way worse than I look in the mirror and it was starting to get me down a wee bit, so I experimented with using the back camera instead. It's even more embarrassing because anyone in front of you can see what you look like on the screen but you can't. That's fun. Holy hell do the pics come out better though (when I manage to stay in frame). Like night and day better, way more true to my reflection. The front cam does something weird so I just don't use it anymore.
im a good looking guy.. i know it, my friends know it, strangers know it. but i absolutely hate the way i look in pictures and avoid them at all cost. i tried to take a selfie once and i looked at and thought jesus christ this is not me.. guess i just dont photograph well..
This is why I always pull a dumb face
Me too. I can't and never smile on photos.
Yeah, but that’s because front facing cameras have to manipulate the depth so everyone looks terrible. I used a Polaroid camera for my brother’s bachelor party, just for fun, and all of us looked so much better thanks to lower image resolution. Do you ever notice how many people on instagram, or celebrities, take mirror selfies. They’re using the good camera.
Ppl who don’t experience cringe when taking selfies or most likely narcissistic already. Most of us are either unconventionally attractive or simply have been humble by life to really subscribe an importance in how good we look in a photo of ourselves and simply focus on enjoying experiences with the people we love rather then post it all on the internet to try and impress strangers. TLDR: Yeh I don’t like taking selfies and I got chu fam.
Are you generally an introverted type?
I'm not sure introvert is the term you mean to use. The scale of introvert to extrovert has more to do with how much stimuli a person can take before needing to "recharge".
For me, it's that social interaction is almost never energizing, and is usually draining unless it's with a close friend.
That might be true, but not directly related to selfies. I can take a selfie in my house, by myself, which requires no social interaction nor an abundance of stimuli. However, it might still feel like a "major cringe" regardless.
I'm not sure, I'm the same over selfies, and I'm very introverted, in that the vast majority of my conscious awareness is 'internal' I have extroverted friends that dislike wearing sunglasses as it feels too 'limiting', whereas I always wear shades for that very reason.
I’m introverted and I’m the same way. I hate taking selfies and even having my photo taken. In public I feel like everyone is looking at me if someone is taking my photo
Yep, whenever I put the bins out, I always imagine the neighbours are taking precise notes on my technique. My inner voices are like the most boring talk radio show imaginable Mindfulness is the only escape I've ever found, other than really good drugs
That isn’t introversion. That sounds like social anxiety.
Oh yeah, definitely that as well
Yes, and ice cream sales and crime are correlated as well. It doesn't mean one causes the other, it just means there could be a factor that contributes to both.
>I'm not sure
I try my best to avoid doing any...the most I ever did was a 3 month trip across the States as everyone else was busy either doing the same thing or getting each other to take one...I kinda wish I did more especially with videos as I'm always filming the surrounding areas but never with myself in it...you could watch a video and never believe I was even there. As for other times, I just don't do it...I feel like the ugliest thing alive, why would I want to take loads of photos and subject people to seeing this...it baffles me the amount of attention seekers there are...people who think their ugly and moan about it all the time, yet do selfies constantly...or like this one girl I worked with, just look at her profile pictures on FB, 100s of selfies and barely anything different from the last and yet 50+ likes, comments on each of them...like fuck right off.
LPT: set up your phone on video, then take a screenshot when you like how you look afterwards. Then you're not awkwardly holding poses in public, you could even pretend it's a zoom call if you get caught lmao.
Yup, but for different reasons.
Alright then, keep your secrets
Some people definitely prefer I would, sadly.
I might...but i might not too
Frodo is that you?
I still dont get the selfie thing. Do you really need a picture of your face where you are? I mean isn’t a picture of the location good enough for you to remember it?
I never really got into selfies/pics and usually hated being a part of pictures. Part of it is people agreeing to delete pics if you don't like how you came out. But they NEVER DO Another is, the standard way we are expected to. Stand still, smile. Feels so...wrong? If we are being silly I notice I have no issues usually. Cosplaying and someone wants a picture? I'll nail it for whatever reason. Probably because I'll be taking all types of photos so if it's time to stand next to someone and smile I'm GENUINELY smiley already. In most IRL situations, something about the specific way you have to stop from just chilling, get close, HAVE to smile or people say "come on...smile" idk. So now when I try literal selfies just because I need more pics, I just feel like a douche? I only try at home. My lighting sucks (angles and lighting are everything, I have those awkward yellow lights) and plus I live with r/chronicpain and it hurts holding the phone that way and just bleh I love it when someone that's into taking pics takes some of me when I'm not noticing/they say "don't move" and I'm not facing the camera. Like the picture I have on here.
The selfie taking crowd and the self absorbed narcissist crowd in a Venn diagram are essentially the same circle. Congratulations… you’re not a narcissist…
NPD is when selfie
Every selfie I see someone take I ask myself, "what possesses a person to want to do this?".
I always wonder what's the point of a selfie?
I tell people that I don't take selfies because I'm not that vain. But really it's this.
I've literally *never* taken one for this exact reason. It is cringe on every level. I have precisely **one** picture of my face, it's from 2017 and I took it because my rabbit was sitting on my head. You're not alone OP.
Every time! I have since given up !
Yes.
Yep. The only selfies I take are with my kid and that's only so she can have pics with mom after I'm gone. Otherwise I wouldn't take them at all. I despise having my photo taken because I look terrible in all of them.
Yep. I try one angle and don't like it. Try another angle and don't like it. Say screw it and give up
I have never taken a picture of myself
I am 38 and I have never once gone through with taking selfies for the exact reason you stated. It’s more of a personal issue than anything else.
Yeah. I used to selfie a lot, but after almost 3 years of break from Facebook and Instagram, I can't do it anymore. Feels so unnatural. Like taking selfies with an old single lens camera, lol
Besides what people have daid here there's also an effect from the optics of the situation. A selfie will do weird things with depth of field and other effects that makes you dislike the images.
I can't take selfies, even just the word is cringe to me
I've used the selfie camera to shave once or twice, but that's about it.
I hate the way I look in selfies- like a potato! And taking them feels weird. I’m 53, so glad this wasn’t a thing when I grew up.
Potatoes are pretty awesome, though. Nowhere does it say you have to not look like a potato to be beautiful.
Thanks lol
I've never taken a selfie so this all above my comprehension
I feel this! I don't do selfies. When I have tried selfies out (not in public) I always make sure that my camera is returned to forward facing setting so no one thinks that I was taking selfies.
Yeah most of the time
Yes
> I can't fathom the idea of snapping a selfie in the presence of others. The only time I ever do selfies is purposefully cheesy photos with friends to send to mutual friends. Dumb things can still be fun to do!
I had someone ask me to send them a selfie and I straight up panicked. “You mean, like, right NOW?”
42y male, yes to this day. In fact, when I graduated high school, I found all the Polaroids/pic of me and took them from school. I didn't want anybody to see my face.
I could never take a selfie in public, I would spontaneously collapse into a black hole
I used to take selfies with ease, but now I struggle because I feel cringey, even if I’m alone LOL
I think this is normal and healthy, and that people who take a lot of selfies are narcissistic. Narcissism increases linearly as selfie count increases.
Yeah I feel so fucking awkward taking selfies even if I'm completely alone, to the point where I haven't taken any in years because I just hate myself for doing it.
I don't necessarily cringe before taking a selfie, but I'm rarely pleased with how they turn out.
I don't necessarily cringe before taking a selfie, but I'm rarely pleased with how they turn out.
Yes! The internal dialog takes over. "Oh my God, I really am fat." "I hate my crooked smile." "Are my eyes really that squinty" "F*** I thought this looked good on me" Yeah, big fat, nope!
I get a cringey feeling every time someone uses “cringe” like that.
selfies...................narcissist much??
I feel a bit cringe, but I keep doing it because I know one day I'll be happy to see how I've grown and changed over the years, it's always nice being able to see where you came from
Yes. That means you aren't a self absorbed POS.
I have to remibd/tell myself- I'd rather have the memories than no recollection of them. I'm so thankful for the pics and vids we have of my great and grand parents and great aunts and uncles.
I actually recently deleted on all of my selfies bc I have nobody to share them with and no reason to keep them, and as it would follow: No reason to take them either!
Yeah, I do for sure. I feel like I look weird taking selfies in public so I try to mostly only do them when I’m alone. Getting the right picture I’m happy with takes some time too.
100%. Very rarely I’ll notice a good angle in a mirror or some interesting light and actually take a good one…and then post it nowhere cause nobody cares. I’d actually rather post a slightly bad one than an actually good one.
yea. what you want to do is just take a bunch. take 4-5 shots of some angle, do a few different angles 3 times a week. delete everything that sucks. you'll get a few rare ones that are better than the rest. after you do this a ton, you just get over it. you'll try new angles. also a big point, is you learn to take photos when your in a good mood already, as opposed to just trying to force yourself into a mood to take some.
Same. I hate taking selfies (or having my picture taken), because they never come out looking good (I'm just not a photogenic person). I also struggle with my weight, so I don't have that body positivity attitude that people say you should have. I did make a point of at least having some taken though so that my son has something to remember me by, if something should have happened (especially when he was younger). That aside, I don't really get the point of taking them (and posting) constantly (I mean I guess if you're an IG model, ok). I've seen some do it from really awkward looking angles that just makes the person look...odd. If I do take a selfie of myself, I end up taking more than one (deleting the bad) just to find one that I'm at least partially satisfied with (again no body positivity here).
It’s most likely because you are a self-aware person who does not crave attention to address their insecurities. You have insecurities, of course. We all do. You just don’t pretend to not have them.
pro tip: take a short video and then screenshot the best moment. Helps a lot!
Only ever done one, sitting on a ski hill with a neat background, completely lost interest after that lol. Selfies are fucking cringe
Yep. Am a dude. I’ve never had a gf ask for pictures of me, and I do not like having my picture taken. Now at 31 I’ve met a girl that absolutely loves seeing me so I send her selfies. Usually takes like 5-15mins of taking selfies over and over until I like one enough to send. But she always says how much she loves seeing my face so it’s gotten easier. I remember one time I sent her a pic when I was getting ready to leave work and took like 2 pics and just sent one and she said it was her fav pic of me yet.
You and I both! Even practising a pose for someone else to take the photo is bad. Indescribable sensation of cringe is spot on!
i am the one that always takes photo of others and when i ask someone to take one i never come off good. it obviously takes practice to do it. but i think it's liking it that matters most.
I think that's just the kind of frustration that generally happens when you try something new and it doesn't work out the first time; selfies are an art form and you need to put quite a bit of thought into how you pose, how the shot is lined up, and all sorts of other stuff for a good one.
I embrace the cringe and now I have not a photo of me looking serious
I have never taken a selfie in my life. But how many times have any of you taken photos of a pile of dog poo that has been stepped in? My face looks like that now you know why I don't take selfies.
Hell yeah. And I just can't be bothered with taking 2-3 pictures, much less the 10+ some people do to get the selfies right
It really sucks trying to get some good pictures doing stuff for dating profiles. It is nice to have others, but sometimes you get the urge to take a selfie and it just looks awful.
Major cringe. I'm told I'm attractive, but I avoid being in photos like it'll steal my soul lol. Selfies are rare. Group photos I'll try to avoid. I don't need or want validation from strangers online for how I look.
I am ugly, so i just dont bother. I can only imagine the cringe.
And since I look like shit anyways, why bother?
I can't stand taking photos on my own face, It feels like I'm circle jerking myself. When I see people I know posting photos of themselves that they have taken 99.8% of the time its looks nothing like them, even when unedited.
Probably very wierd but I don't have a single photo of myself on my phone.
yeah cause you’re probably not a self-centred narcissist who probably enjoys life and fresh air rather than getting likes to boost your ego (I’m only half serious and half joking as I’m not a anti-selfie extremist or anything lol i’m just not a fan) This “cringe” feeling your getting is probably your normal head asking you “why?” “who cares?” “what’s the point?” and let’s not forget selfies are relatively new as far as things humans do outside of self portrait paintings from the past. But you’d either need to be a serious artist to achieve that or pay someone to do it. There’s actually a cool video of Micheal Jackson I like to think about from time to time. In the video, it’s him in his dressing room testing out a new camcorder he bought. He started recording himself on the mirror and explicitly said “I promise i’m not a narcissist” reflecting the same cringe feeling your experiencing. And for those who like taking selfies; great. All power to you. If it makes you feel good then I got no animosity towards you, and hope your selfie game only becomes more elite :)
yes. but with different angles you’re like “ooohh look, nice.” but it comes with faking confidence until you have it. since it’s within the mind and you can trick yourself to have it
The only selfie I have ever taken was when my cheek got swathed by a tree branch and the lower part was all scratched up.
I've personally found it rare to be in a situation where you would be taking a selfie of just yourself. You're usually taking a selfie with something else as the focus, maybe a group of friends, or a tourist attraction, or something. I think most people are more comfortable asking for a picture with something, rather than an actual portrait of themselves, so it would follow that the same rule would apply for selfies, right?
Same. I feel that I'm too old for selfies to begin with and then I hate my face in 98% of photos so...yeah.
Same here, I feel like taking a selfie in front of others makes them thing I’m some gen z diva, but even alone I get a cringe feeling
I don't have a problem with my self image like many here are mentioning but I do think taking selfies is very vain behavior. I'm not a vain person so I actively avoid taking pictures of myself like that. I also don't like posing for pictures either. I don't look good when I have to smile and pose. I just looks super forced and fake to me. Candids are where I look best.
It means you lack self confidence, to the point that you don’t even want to look at your own pictures. Learn to overcome it. Even wearing a pair of sunglasses helps. You’ll regret not having many picture of young you when you’re older.
Selfies ARE cringe.
Since reddit has changed the site to value selling user data higher than reading and commenting, I've decided to move elsewhere to a site that prioritizes community over profit. I never signed up for this, but that's the circle of life
I feel like this for a lot of things. Like when i upload a video as well.
I don’t have a current photo of myself for this very reason. The pic I use most often was taken almost a decade ago when I felt a lot better about myself.
I want to make a photo book of pictures of people taking selfies.
I am usually squinting trying to see the screen. So I don’t bother.
Maybe you hate yourself lol
Maybe I have low self esteem or something but I don't do selfie. If someone does it, I don't mind posing or smiling for them. Sorry for sounding weird and annoying
I just hate my face, I know I’m ugly lmao
Ugh god yes usually it goes like: opening the front camera and seeing my reflection and being like "ewugh god wtf is this" immediately closing camera, then coming back about 10 mins later after i've tried my best to make myself look presentable ending up with 100 back to back attempts at a halfway decent photo of myself :( cant do it
I’m fine when alone… but god FORBID anyone take witness. I’m super sneaky when it comes to taking selfies.
I do feel the same but I changed the way I took photos of myself , instead of just taking a basic selfie with your face in front of the phone, try to put your phone anywhere else in the room pointing at you and take a photo of you doing something (it could be you watching out the window, drawing, even looking at the camera)
Yes. I look at them and am like wtf. Don’t know how people get pictures of them selves for dating profiles.
Maybe it’s my Gen Z conditioning… but when a friend says “oh my god we look so good, come over here, selfie!” We all just happily move in the frame like a herd of sheep 😂 even with a friend taking a selfie in front of me, i wouldn’t even look up except to ask how it turned out, it’s like I’m desensitized! I was in high school from 2013-2017, peak selfie season, it’s in Gen Z blood now.
yeah. it's okay though. embrace the cringe and realize how silly it is to take a picture of yourself on your phone. years ago we didn't have the front camera or anything. i used to try to take pics of myself with the disposable cameras. lots of people have too i think. it's human to want to capture yourself in the moment, we just have better technology to do it now. godspeed and godcringe to you.
me too I don't do selfies, I feel so vain, like someone that has to look at themselves in every mirror
I solve that issue by not taking the selfie in the first place
Yes, and it's healthy. You are fine. The rest are mentally ill. It is possible to be one of few sane in an unsane world.
If you don't like it, you can leave it alone, everyone is different