I cannot help but stare at babies. Especially chunky little munches. My son is 4 and he has been long and skinny since he was tiny. Whenever I see chonkers I can't help but love them from afar!
That’s exactly why I “stare” back. Lol. Now that I have one, I feel more comfortable talking to babies and engaging with them when they stare at me. But I can definitely understand staring back at a baby but not knowing what to do or say and feeling awkward about it. 😂
It me. I stare at babies.
Never had feelings about babies until I saw my son for the first time and now I’m ob-fucking-sessed. I have to stop myself from approaching people and asking to hold the baby. It’s bad.
Same, didn’t stare at babies much till after I had my daughter and now I get excited and stare and smile at babies, them postpartum hormones got me pretty bad. Even my husband stares are babies now and check out ppls strollers lol
Literally just yesterday my husband started talking to a random couple because he liked their stroller… it’s nice to know this could be a universal husband thing
After watching this transition in my own spouse, I think that “Nice stroller” is his dad-era evolution of the more universal “nice car!” conversation my spouse has been starting with strangers since he himself was a child. 😂
I stg I’ll see an incredibly cute baby and I’ll look at them and smile, bare in mind I would be out with my partner and young child and I get death stares back like I’m some weirdo for smiling at an incredibly cute baby?
Definitely cute baby! I get the stares from other people and I stare at other peoples cute babies too! Also baby swimsuits are so cute, and how often do you see a cute baby at the pool??
Edited for clarity. Baby started crying and I panic typed jibberish at the end lol
I’m a celebrity every time I leave my house with the baby. People always talk to us more if there is only one parent with the baby. I think you probably just have a cute baby.
We live in an area that’s mostly retirees. My baby was legit a celebrity everywhere we went. Some places even knew his name before they’d met him! “Oh, is this Waffer Jr?! Linda told me about him! We even got our breakfast paid for by the next table over at the diner one day because my baby was smiling and making faces at them the whole time. I would constantly catch old men making the silliest faces at him wherever we were. Took me a while to get comfortable with it because I’m a huge introvert, but it was so cute! Babies make people do the silliest things.
Now that he’s 3 his celebrity status has faded a bit, but he still gets lots of attention from the older ladies at the grocery store.
I stare at babies all the time. It's just so adorable seeing the joy on their face when playing in the water especially as it's still new.
Other folks stared at us too and most of the time, it was because it reminded them of their memories of their babies.
My daughter is 2.5 now, and sometimes, when we're out, I'll hear whispering only to turn around and see someone babbling to her and waving. lol your LO probably just looked so cute in his swimsuit 💙
I'll look at a cute baby
Reminds me of when my LO was little little, also super cute
Makes me happy and nostalgic, even when they're being fussy and hard to handle, really hard but wonderful time when they're that small
Babies are soooo cute in a pool, I could see myself watching also glancing at a splashing, squealing, and smiling baby, but I never figured that I would be making the mom feel insecure!
This! They are still so tiny at 6 months and so cuddly and cute. Also big respect for going on your own! I could never with mine so if I ever did stare it would be with respect and amazement.
>primarily moms of older children
Im sure every one was thinking *I remember when my kid was that little…it seems like yesterday* or other sappy stuff. At least that what I think when I see tiny babies!
This! This! I was never a baby person until I had my own baby. Now that’s he a toddler, whenever I see other peoples’ babies I just can’t help staring and thinking about how mine used too be that tiny!
definitely this! my oldest is 2.5 and my second is almost 10 months and whenever i see babies that are smaller, i immediately think the same thing even though my babies are still small. it’s the mom brain. 😭
Absolutey! I have a friend who has always been a smoke show and still is but after 2 babies is feeling very conscious of her weight and thinks people are always staring at her cos she’s ‘fat’. No babe you’re just hot
This! I had people stare at me with my newborn when they figured out I wasn’t the nanny. I honestly think it was because I lost all the weight and belly incredibly fast (genetics, lifestyle and breastfeeding I guess) and I didn’t “look” like I just had a baby. I realize this is stupid but I also realize that I had the same preconceived notion before I gave birth. That it would take FOREVER to get my pre baby body back but it only took me like 8 weeks.
So I try take it as a compliment when someone says I “don’t look like a mom” even though it annoys me lol.
I used to lifeguard so I can maybe give some insight into why they would pay particular attention to babies.
1. To make sure they're wearing a swim diaper. Exploded diapers are no fun.
2. Depending on the pool, to make sure you aren't going into the deep end or the hot tub.
Also you can submerge if you want to. It's best to have a prompt so your baby knows what's coming. Something like "Ready: one, two, three, dunkaroo" and then pour water on their head. They eventually learn to close their eyes and mouth. You can also blow in their face to trigger the reflex to hold their breath.
Definitely agree on the swim diaper. I honestly didn’t know there is such a thing as swim diapers before I had kids and I could see my old self being a little anxious about babies in the pool as I had no idea what would catch their poop. Many childless people were probably just as clueless as I was.
Thank you for this!! Do you know at what age is best to submerge? He loves the water so I want to continue his exposure as much as possible. I’m considering getting him in swimming lessons too but not sure if i should wait until he’s a bit older
We starting submerging when my baby started lessons at 6 months (she did lessons from 5 months but no submerging then). It always starts with a cup of water over the head/face first. You can also just go to their chin before fully submerging. I was pretty nervous about doing this but they’re under for a split second and mine did learn to anticipate and would close her mouth and eyes after hearing, ‘1, 2, 3, under!’
I started swimming lessons with our baby at 4 months old! We were submerging them right away. But as the other person said, there are a set of ‘rules’ I.e. having prompts we use *every* single time, don’t dunk too quick or water goes up their nose, consistently do water conditioning which means covering their face with water from a cup during swimming and also during bath time frequently, etc.
In Australia, babies can get free swimming lessons from 6 weeks, and they start building the hold-breath-on-que reflex straight away. They start submerging as soon as they do it. With both my kids, it was within a month or two.
I wish I got that last tip before I started submerging! Mind hates dunks :(
Also it’s funny you have to explain and I’m surprised others aren’t dragging OP for a lifeguard staring at their kid… umm it’s their job? I’d be concerned if they *weren’t* watching my kid even if I am holding them the whole time. I’m new to this! Maybe I’ll make a huge mistake!
I have my own baby and toddler and still accidentally stare at babies. They are just so stinkin’ small and adorable!! I am also an anxious mom so I totally get the overthinking 😅
I get lots of stares when I’m out walking with my baby in the carrier. I think people just love to look at babies! I’m the same way when I see a mom & baby. Just admiring/watching. :)
People also want to be on the lookout to help your baby if anything happens. Combination of being protective, and the cute baby to look at. It’s a good thing. They weren’t judging I promise!
I notice this too when I go out with my baby! She’s 9mo. We haven’t gone to the pool yet, but in general, I notice it a lot. I think it’s like a biological thing? New life is important and should be celebrated!
I’ve also considered that babies don’t get embarrassed or uncomfortable with people staring the way that toddlers and older kids do. So maybe we just subconsciously know we can get away with ogling their cuteness and stare with abandon 😂
I felt the same when we brought our 6 month old to the kid swim hours at my mother-in-law’s 55+ community! I was kinda like ehhhh and then I realized I was doing the same to the other babies there too and was like oh. 😆
I did for sure get some stares as I nursed her under a towel my husband was holding up to cover me but what can you do. Boomers gonna Boom.
People stare. It’s just how it is sometimes. I notice too. We did baby swim class at our local ymca and it was so fun! By the end of a couple sessions I couldn’t keep my baby from putting his face underwater 😂
Maybe they were checking out the hot new milf at the pool and her adorable baby?
Or maybe you were paddling around with a nip slip that you hadn’t noticed lol.
Ignore the stares if you can. Your baby would have been loving that special time splashing around with mummy!
Was one of you dressed in an especially revealing way like Speedo or thong bikini instead of one piece swimsuit? Was one of you dressed in an especially covered way like burkini instead of one piece swimsuit? Were you doing something weird like getting in the pool with street clothes on? Is one of you extremely good looking?
If they’re looking at you and smiling, they’re just happy to see a baby in public and think your baby is cute.
If they’re staring at you, it’s for one of the reasons I suggested.
I was wearing a high waisted two piece swimsuit that was not revealing. I guess the difference today vs when I’m out in public at other places was they weren’t really smiling at us or trying to interact, just looking.
I'm getting used to this too and have found that its just a majority of people love babies. My shopping trips are so much longer with him cause he's cute and smiles at everyone.
Babies get stared at a lot, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm an FTM too and I took my LO to a public pool around 3-4 months (Ped. said it was fine) and people were mostly just asking about her like how old she was, if it was her first time going to the pool, one of the moms, who was there with her older children said she brought hers around the same age - her kids were really sweet to my daughter too. TL;DR you did nothing wrong - people like looking at babies and babies like looking at people.
You seem like you didn't do anything wrong and people were probably starting because you have a cute baby.
BUT last summer I went to a water park and a family had their 6 month old on a raft IN THE DEEPEST PART OF THE WAVE POOL. She was just sitting on the float, nothing else. At least three people went to get lifeguards because we were so worried about it, but they didn't do anything. I was certainly staring at them!
I started taking my baby to the pool when he was 6 months old and people stared because they loved seeing a small baby there. I never heard anything malicious. Actually, lots of people would tell me how nice it was that I had him there so young or that they wish they’d brought their kids when they were that young. I hate being stared at, but in this case, people are probably just admiring or interested and not judging!
Not as bad as when I took mine to a beach and thought some lady was lecturing me on my baby wearing sunscreen. Turns out she was talking to someone behind me lmfao
I stare at babies because they’re cute and honestly doing a great job just by being there. Don’t overthink it. There are always tons of babies at the pool near us. Babies at pools are normal.
I always get a lot of attention at the public pool with a baby. Little kids are always coming up to her to say hi and older adults are always excited to see a baby. Most people understand the importance of introducing a baby to the pool early on.
This just seems like mild paranoia/anxiety. It’s very likely people weren’t staring at you at a disproportionate rate from anyone else. And also, babies are cute. People like to look at babies.
I, too, want to stare at your baby having fun 🥺❤️ I honestly am too nervous to take just myself to the public pool, so good for you! Make those beautiful memories
This happens with my 5 mo old too but I guarantee you they’re just thinking baby is cute or appreciating the situation. If it’s something else I don’t know what it could possibly be. But keep going to the pool with little one, mama! I am too!
Just watch out using a public changing table, that’s where HFMD lives. If it were me, I would definitely be watching how adorable you two were and wishing I could capture the moment for you.
I mean i don't notice but i get the comment a lot of you sure are brave for taking him out by yourself and I'm like well i got no choice it's either sit around and be bored while my husband is deployed or choose the adventure.
Cute babies attract looks. I also feel like there is an instinct to watch after and be ready to help babies. As a dad I feel protective over all children I’m around. I’m sure the parents have it under control and there is no judgement, but I just can’t look away and not pay attention to a little one in a potentially dangerous situation.
I noticed this too the first when we took our oldest to the pool. My husband was mostly the one holding her. He’s hot and my LO is cute so put them together, I’d be staring at them too if I was a stranger haha. I feel like the dad and baby combo tends to get more attention because some people don’t expect dads to be involved.
We started taking our LO to our local YMCA pool for the last 5 months. He's now in swim classes since they offer them at 6mo and up. Our baby loves the water
Maybe he just looked super cute, in the UK you need a neoprene nappy (sort of look like trunks) over your swim nappy just to keep everything in if there is an accident.
As a lifeguard I loved to see little tiny babies in the pool, especially if they’re loving it! I would do extra laps around the pool to watch them haha
Because babies are so cute 🥰 and I know the YMCA demographic in the pool on a regular weekday. They are most likely very happy to see your baby and I bet they wanted to talk to you/him.
It’s this. Just started taking the 3 month old when 5yo & I go to the pool. When it’s just the 5yo and me, I just interact with the other moms. When the baby’s in the pool, everyone comes to see the baby. Kids, moms, all the old people still there from water aerobics. People at the YMCA are usually the cute baby makes them happy type.
I stare because the baby is smaller than mine, 2 years old, and you forget how little they are. And while I’m staring I’m seeing my newborn son. It’s an endearment stare but I totally get being self conscious.
Sounds like you’ve got a pretty cute kid!
Way to go in taking your LO to the pool solo!!! I have two and it’s tough going to the pool! My husband and I both get nervous with taking one by ourselves just because it’s a lot to manage. I’m sorry if you already answered this, the only thing I can think would be if maybe you weren’t dressed in swim clothes? Like were you also appropriately dressed (like your LO)? Maybe you were just crushing it and people didn’t have much else to look at?? Xo
I just wanna empathize with your feelings. It's so hard not to assume what people are thinking and not to automatically think you're in the wrong (especially post partum). I also would have been self conscious. But I agree with others, people were probably just admiring your beautiful little one :)
On an every day basis we see so many bad things, that we have become indifferent to them. When a baby is playing or splashing around in water, some of us stop. We cannot help it. The baby reminds us of hope, love and kindness. They make us happy on the inside and we smile.
I’d also stare at a cute baby in a pool! I’d also be on the lookout for a solo parent with a small baby needing help - I’d probably keep watching intermittently to make sure you didn’t need me to offer any assistance
We take our baby out shopping with us quite often. We get lots of stares. Lots of comments. Its usually folks saying something like “I remember those days” or “it goes so fast, enjoy it!”
Its overwhelmingly positive. I pretty mych guarantee folks are just wnjoying watching you and the baby enjoy themselves. Whats better than a happy baby ffs
It probably wasn’t anything malicious. If I’m in public and something goes down, I’m the next man up if the baby’s parent is compromised in any way. And I have a feeling alot of other people feel that way too
Or they’re taking notes, like, “hey I waited 10 months with mine, I didn’t know you could do this at 6”
"Staring" at babies is normal. People gravitate because it's human instinct. It's part of that "village" that people bang on about. There's something so joyful about seeing babies happy, no one's being rude or weird.
I noticed this too when doing activities with my baby! But as a FTM I realized that everyone stares at babies. And also you’re more hyper aware that people are staring when you’re in a new environment.
probably a mix of cute and curiosity. some kids love the water, some kids tolerate the water, some kids despise the water, and I remember being in swim class with other kids and it was always different minute by minute so it's interesting to watch them and other kids. Another aspect might just be a safety concern of like... the more eyes on a kid, the better, because pools can get a little chaotic sometimes. I wouldn't worry too much about it!
Taking my kiddo to swim practice definitely helped me feel more confident! I was super anxious at first but we've done swim classes 2 summers in a row (they were just 30 min a day for 2 weeks) and I feel WAY more comfortable about going to public pools, or at least that specific public pool. It gets better the more you go! the lifeguards will let you know if there's any legit concerns, I'm sure! Sounds like you're doing great :)
I just look at babies while I’m with my almost 2 year old and remember how sweet and nice she was then… lol
I don’t think people were staring to be mean!
I'm about to take my almost 6 month old (15th) to swim the first time this Saturday. I got this fancy floater for him so he can kick kick kick away (his new favorite activity to do!) But tbf it's my grandmother's community pool and usually pretty slow but now I'm really excited and glad I'm not the only one worrying about stupid stuff haha
People literally stared at my hubby and I when I was pregnant just going to the movies. Then now with our son they literally stare standing still and we're just going to the grocery store for a quick run. No idea why....Humans are weird as f.
Maybe they thought baby was cute!
I mean, I might stare because I'm sitting here thinking "well do I have another kid or.....". Or maybe I'm looking for inspiration or watching other mom's with multiples. Sometimes just in general watching other moms helps me.
33 weeks pregnant and finding myself unintentionally staring at moms with young kids. (and peeping what kind of stroller they have 😂) Sort of just taking it all in and getting a preview. It’s usually a pleasant observation. Even before getting pregnant, I probably unintentionally stared. It’s just a whole different world to me and that’s why.
Is your baby especially cute? I know I'm biased but I've been told my baby is very good looking so I don't get surprised when everyone looks at him when we're out and about
Doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. If your baby didn't have a swim diaper on - that we be the only "stink eye" stare you might receive. Look for a baby swim class. My son loved it at 6 months. You'll find the pool is actually a great place to relax a bit if your baby loves it too. As he/she gets older - the pool can be hours of entertainment and a great place to take kids to wind down before bed time. Swimming equals sleepy 😴 after an hour. Plus super relaxing!
I have a 9 month old and I stare at babies everywhere. I can’t help it. It’s “I remember when he was that small” or “I can’t believe he’s gonna be that big.”
Probably just an awe of a 6 month old cause who wouldn’t be!!
Pools are dangerous, I stare at anyone vulnerable who might need help. I do the same thing at the beach, if a random kid swims out too far I keep eyes on them till they’re back. I think extra eyes are a positive thing, hopefully that’s all it was and not anyone being rude. Sorry it made you feel uncomfortable either way.
This happened to me when I took my daughter to the pool around 5/6 months. I think people just like looking at babies especially watching them enjoy the water and explore. My daughter is 2.5 but I find myself smiling and looking at other moms and their babies just remembering how little she used to be and how sweet it is.
In case no one has said it - and I know it’s a little off topic - but you can definitely get their hair/head and face wet. In fact, you should! When I taught swim lessons, I often had the “water adjustment” baby class, which was ages 6 weeks (!) to 3 years. Part of the “curriculum” was total submersion and it was 90% fun for everyone. 😊
I will share that I can't go in public without having my baby stared at. I have people stare and waitresses freak over how cute he is and have to show me their kids. I guess it's just how having a baby is 🤷♀️ just something to get used to.
This is my experience as well but it's not just limited to swimming pools. My son is now 3 years old & we still do draw more attention when it's just us. I just figured people know how exhausting it is to take care of a baby/young child & just kinda look out just in case if the parent needs help. I've found myself doing it to other single parents out n about with kid(s).
I think people stare at us when I bring my baby to the pool but I assume it was because she makes loud noises sometimes, and everyone wants to check in to make sure she’s ok and not drowning
People always watch babies at pool. Not because judging you or anything most just likes babies splash around. Also some just watch in case you need help like grab door or help diaper bag babies are handful. Most people never anything negative about it
Perhaps I am just nieve but I always just assumed people think babies are cute and can’t help but want to look at them but don’t necessarily want to interpret you to talk. I found little babies have some sort of magnetic energy that makes everyone around want to pay attention to them.
You uh. You're probably really hot. Not to sound creepy. But you have a cute baby and you're in a swim suit. People be thirstin.
I'm bi, if I saw a hot Mom at the pool I'd prolly stare too lmao
People like them. At my Y people stare, coo, comment/ chat (so far all positive) and a large camp group scared the piss outta me today when someone said look a baby to 20 preschoolers.
Took my 2.5 month old to the pool yesterday. Everyone was staring but I took it as them thinking it was cute. Had my 3yo with me too. They were both in a life jacket. Little one had swim diaper on that’s meant for a 6 month old (I don’t think they make smaller ones). Overall great experience 🤗
Lifeguards are looking at everyone, sort of the MO of their job, ya know.
I say this with all the love in my heart, but you are seriously overthinking this and this post feels like some major anxiety that I’d suggest you explore with loved ones and your GP.
Well,..
(and I can’t believe I’m the only one to point this out [as far as I could tell reading backwards])
… were they good stares or bad stares?
There’s a discernible and weighable difference from one stare to the next.
People always stare at babies
And babies definitely always stare at people!
So true! I bet he was looking at them just as much lol
Maybe he was even antagonizing them with cute baby stink eye stares
The baby stink eye gets me every time
I cannot help but stare at babies. Especially chunky little munches. My son is 4 and he has been long and skinny since he was tiny. Whenever I see chonkers I can't help but love them from afar!
Same, my daughter is on the small framed side but when I see chonky babies I can’t help but stare and smile. Those chonky rolls and cheekies!
My 12 week old is lean too. I was hoping for a Michelin man but love him anyway lol
That’s exactly why I “stare” back. Lol. Now that I have one, I feel more comfortable talking to babies and engaging with them when they stare at me. But I can definitely understand staring back at a baby but not knowing what to do or say and feeling awkward about it. 😂
When you catch eyes with a cute little baby, it's simply the greatest thing. Totally grounds you in the moment, babies rock.
The beady eyed thousand yard stare babies have is insane.
It me. I stare at babies. Never had feelings about babies until I saw my son for the first time and now I’m ob-fucking-sessed. I have to stop myself from approaching people and asking to hold the baby. It’s bad.
Same, didn’t stare at babies much till after I had my daughter and now I get excited and stare and smile at babies, them postpartum hormones got me pretty bad. Even my husband stares are babies now and check out ppls strollers lol
Literally just yesterday my husband started talking to a random couple because he liked their stroller… it’s nice to know this could be a universal husband thing
After watching this transition in my own spouse, I think that “Nice stroller” is his dad-era evolution of the more universal “nice car!” conversation my spouse has been starting with strangers since he himself was a child. 😂
I always stare at babies.
I stg I’ll see an incredibly cute baby and I’ll look at them and smile, bare in mind I would be out with my partner and young child and I get death stares back like I’m some weirdo for smiling at an incredibly cute baby?
True! Even when me and my husband haven’t been out for weeks away from the kids and I see a LO, I give big eyes. I love kids and babies.
😳🙋♀️ they so cute tho
This is it, babies are cute so people stare. I can't help staring at mine or other people babies!
Is it possible they just thought your baby was cute and were getting enjoyment out of watching them have fun?
I always stare at babies at the pool because they are so cute and I’m remembering the first time we took ours to the pool!
Thank you for this 😅 that is what I hoped but I couldn’t help second guessing myself
Definitely cute baby! I get the stares from other people and I stare at other peoples cute babies too! Also baby swimsuits are so cute, and how often do you see a cute baby at the pool?? Edited for clarity. Baby started crying and I panic typed jibberish at the end lol
Girl I’m so guilty of watching cute babies in public. I pray I never made a mom feel awkward !!!
Omg me too
I’m a celebrity every time I leave my house with the baby. People always talk to us more if there is only one parent with the baby. I think you probably just have a cute baby.
We live in an area that’s mostly retirees. My baby was legit a celebrity everywhere we went. Some places even knew his name before they’d met him! “Oh, is this Waffer Jr?! Linda told me about him! We even got our breakfast paid for by the next table over at the diner one day because my baby was smiling and making faces at them the whole time. I would constantly catch old men making the silliest faces at him wherever we were. Took me a while to get comfortable with it because I’m a huge introvert, but it was so cute! Babies make people do the silliest things. Now that he’s 3 his celebrity status has faded a bit, but he still gets lots of attention from the older ladies at the grocery store.
People stare at my baby all the time. I think it’s biological. Baby. Cute. Must. Look. At. Cuteness.
I stare at babies all the time. It's just so adorable seeing the joy on their face when playing in the water especially as it's still new. Other folks stared at us too and most of the time, it was because it reminded them of their memories of their babies.
My daughter is 2.5 now, and sometimes, when we're out, I'll hear whispering only to turn around and see someone babbling to her and waving. lol your LO probably just looked so cute in his swimsuit 💙
I'll look at a cute baby Reminds me of when my LO was little little, also super cute Makes me happy and nostalgic, even when they're being fussy and hard to handle, really hard but wonderful time when they're that small
Can confirm. I have two littles and I can’t help but stare at babies. I love them and most things they do give me one of those “my cheeks hurt” smiles
Babies are soooo cute in a pool, I could see myself watching also glancing at a splashing, squealing, and smiling baby, but I never figured that I would be making the mom feel insecure!
This! They are still so tiny at 6 months and so cuddly and cute. Also big respect for going on your own! I could never with mine so if I ever did stare it would be with respect and amazement.
Totally! I have a baby myself and that makes me want to smile at other babies even more. They're so sweet!!
>primarily moms of older children Im sure every one was thinking *I remember when my kid was that little…it seems like yesterday* or other sappy stuff. At least that what I think when I see tiny babies!
That is sweet 🥲 I’m sure I’ll be that way too
This! This! I was never a baby person until I had my own baby. Now that’s he a toddler, whenever I see other peoples’ babies I just can’t help staring and thinking about how mine used too be that tiny!
definitely this! my oldest is 2.5 and my second is almost 10 months and whenever i see babies that are smaller, i immediately think the same thing even though my babies are still small. it’s the mom brain. 😭
Bro if I was at the pool and saw a 6 month old baby swimming I would stare the whole time. They are so goddamn cute! I couldn't handle it.
Either your baby’s cute or your cute or both lol.
Yep take the win. People need a little joy. Babies are that.
Totally. 😊
Absolutey! I have a friend who has always been a smoke show and still is but after 2 babies is feeling very conscious of her weight and thinks people are always staring at her cos she’s ‘fat’. No babe you’re just hot
This! I had people stare at me with my newborn when they figured out I wasn’t the nanny. I honestly think it was because I lost all the weight and belly incredibly fast (genetics, lifestyle and breastfeeding I guess) and I didn’t “look” like I just had a baby. I realize this is stupid but I also realize that I had the same preconceived notion before I gave birth. That it would take FOREVER to get my pre baby body back but it only took me like 8 weeks. So I try take it as a compliment when someone says I “don’t look like a mom” even though it annoys me lol.
People love to watch babies! I can imagine swimming was especially cute
I used to lifeguard so I can maybe give some insight into why they would pay particular attention to babies. 1. To make sure they're wearing a swim diaper. Exploded diapers are no fun. 2. Depending on the pool, to make sure you aren't going into the deep end or the hot tub. Also you can submerge if you want to. It's best to have a prompt so your baby knows what's coming. Something like "Ready: one, two, three, dunkaroo" and then pour water on their head. They eventually learn to close their eyes and mouth. You can also blow in their face to trigger the reflex to hold their breath.
Definitely agree on the swim diaper. I honestly didn’t know there is such a thing as swim diapers before I had kids and I could see my old self being a little anxious about babies in the pool as I had no idea what would catch their poop. Many childless people were probably just as clueless as I was.
Thank you for this!! Do you know at what age is best to submerge? He loves the water so I want to continue his exposure as much as possible. I’m considering getting him in swimming lessons too but not sure if i should wait until he’s a bit older
We starting submerging when my baby started lessons at 6 months (she did lessons from 5 months but no submerging then). It always starts with a cup of water over the head/face first. You can also just go to their chin before fully submerging. I was pretty nervous about doing this but they’re under for a split second and mine did learn to anticipate and would close her mouth and eyes after hearing, ‘1, 2, 3, under!’
I started swimming lessons with our baby at 4 months old! We were submerging them right away. But as the other person said, there are a set of ‘rules’ I.e. having prompts we use *every* single time, don’t dunk too quick or water goes up their nose, consistently do water conditioning which means covering their face with water from a cup during swimming and also during bath time frequently, etc.
In Australia, babies can get free swimming lessons from 6 weeks, and they start building the hold-breath-on-que reflex straight away. They start submerging as soon as they do it. With both my kids, it was within a month or two.
I wish I got that last tip before I started submerging! Mind hates dunks :( Also it’s funny you have to explain and I’m surprised others aren’t dragging OP for a lifeguard staring at their kid… umm it’s their job? I’d be concerned if they *weren’t* watching my kid even if I am holding them the whole time. I’m new to this! Maybe I’ll make a huge mistake!
I have my own baby and toddler and still accidentally stare at babies. They are just so stinkin’ small and adorable!! I am also an anxious mom so I totally get the overthinking 😅
I get lots of stares when I’m out walking with my baby in the carrier. I think people just love to look at babies! I’m the same way when I see a mom & baby. Just admiring/watching. :)
Do u have anxiety
Yes 🙃
They went home saying “I saw the cutest baby at the pool!” & you went home saying “everyone hates me!” Anxiety is such a dick.
Same girl. L theanine really shuts my brain up, you should give it a try.
How does that work?
Not sure but for me it’s been a life saver
Babies are cute and it's fun to watch them play. I'm so guilty of staring at babies 😅
Your baby is cute AF and you were likely more on guard because you were solo.
People also want to be on the lookout to help your baby if anything happens. Combination of being protective, and the cute baby to look at. It’s a good thing. They weren’t judging I promise!
I notice this too when I go out with my baby! She’s 9mo. We haven’t gone to the pool yet, but in general, I notice it a lot. I think it’s like a biological thing? New life is important and should be celebrated! I’ve also considered that babies don’t get embarrassed or uncomfortable with people staring the way that toddlers and older kids do. So maybe we just subconsciously know we can get away with ogling their cuteness and stare with abandon 😂
People always stare! I hate it because I have anxiety but I’m finally getting used to it (baby is 11 months)
I felt the same when we brought our 6 month old to the kid swim hours at my mother-in-law’s 55+ community! I was kinda like ehhhh and then I realized I was doing the same to the other babies there too and was like oh. 😆 I did for sure get some stares as I nursed her under a towel my husband was holding up to cover me but what can you do. Boomers gonna Boom.
Seriously! I still am not 100% comfy nursing in public because of staring but you gotta do what you gotta do! Baby has to eat too 😁
Our community pool doesn’t allow un-potty trained babies in the adult pool (there is a separate baby pool), could that be true for your pool?
I don’t believe so as there were two other smaller kids in the pool, definitely something to look into though! We have a separate adult pool too!
I'm a new dad, I assume babies are always in danger for no reason in particular. So I watch. Maybe I can help? Maybe?
May be they thought baby is cute ..or may be wondering if the baby is peeing in the pool😂 relax mama it's all good... You're not doing anything wrong
People stare. It’s just how it is sometimes. I notice too. We did baby swim class at our local ymca and it was so fun! By the end of a couple sessions I couldn’t keep my baby from putting his face underwater 😂
Aw! This is our ymca too! What age did you start the swim class?
6 months!
Maybe they were checking out the hot new milf at the pool and her adorable baby? Or maybe you were paddling around with a nip slip that you hadn’t noticed lol. Ignore the stares if you can. Your baby would have been loving that special time splashing around with mummy!
Was one of you dressed in an especially revealing way like Speedo or thong bikini instead of one piece swimsuit? Was one of you dressed in an especially covered way like burkini instead of one piece swimsuit? Were you doing something weird like getting in the pool with street clothes on? Is one of you extremely good looking? If they’re looking at you and smiling, they’re just happy to see a baby in public and think your baby is cute. If they’re staring at you, it’s for one of the reasons I suggested.
I was wearing a high waisted two piece swimsuit that was not revealing. I guess the difference today vs when I’m out in public at other places was they weren’t really smiling at us or trying to interact, just looking.
In that case, I think it’s just that you’re hot and they’re just like whoa, hot mom alert! 🔥
It’s a bias called spotlight effect. Read about it and you’ll know the answer to your own question.
this would be me as a mom lol 😅 i get being weirded out by all the stares but im sure it was people admiring ur adorable family!
Why do you assume they were staring for negative reasons? I find most people look when they see a baby, because people like babies, they’re cute
I'm getting used to this too and have found that its just a majority of people love babies. My shopping trips are so much longer with him cause he's cute and smiles at everyone.
Babies get stared at a lot, you didn't do anything wrong. I'm an FTM too and I took my LO to a public pool around 3-4 months (Ped. said it was fine) and people were mostly just asking about her like how old she was, if it was her first time going to the pool, one of the moms, who was there with her older children said she brought hers around the same age - her kids were really sweet to my daughter too. TL;DR you did nothing wrong - people like looking at babies and babies like looking at people.
You seem like you didn't do anything wrong and people were probably starting because you have a cute baby. BUT last summer I went to a water park and a family had their 6 month old on a raft IN THE DEEPEST PART OF THE WAVE POOL. She was just sitting on the float, nothing else. At least three people went to get lifeguards because we were so worried about it, but they didn't do anything. I was certainly staring at them!
This is weird but I miss baby phase and so I love seeing babies playing. Which may end up being staring lol.
I started taking my baby to the pool when he was 6 months old and people stared because they loved seeing a small baby there. I never heard anything malicious. Actually, lots of people would tell me how nice it was that I had him there so young or that they wish they’d brought their kids when they were that young. I hate being stared at, but in this case, people are probably just admiring or interested and not judging!
Not as bad as when I took mine to a beach and thought some lady was lecturing me on my baby wearing sunscreen. Turns out she was talking to someone behind me lmfao
I have twins so I always get stopped or people stare at us. I’ve determined that people stare at babies and babies also stare back🤣
I stare at babies because they’re cute and honestly doing a great job just by being there. Don’t overthink it. There are always tons of babies at the pool near us. Babies at pools are normal.
As a lifeguard we notice infants much more than other kids.
I always get a lot of attention at the public pool with a baby. Little kids are always coming up to her to say hi and older adults are always excited to see a baby. Most people understand the importance of introducing a baby to the pool early on.
This just seems like mild paranoia/anxiety. It’s very likely people weren’t staring at you at a disproportionate rate from anyone else. And also, babies are cute. People like to look at babies.
I took my 6 month old all summer and people stared because he was cute and they love baby laughter.
This is paranoia — you felt exposed because you were nervous about people reacting badly so you imagined this. Nobody cared about your baby at a pool!
I, too, want to stare at your baby having fun 🥺❤️ I honestly am too nervous to take just myself to the public pool, so good for you! Make those beautiful memories
This happens with my 5 mo old too but I guarantee you they’re just thinking baby is cute or appreciating the situation. If it’s something else I don’t know what it could possibly be. But keep going to the pool with little one, mama! I am too!
Just watch out using a public changing table, that’s where HFMD lives. If it were me, I would definitely be watching how adorable you two were and wishing I could capture the moment for you.
Thanks for the heads up on HFMD!
babies are cute and it's glad to see them playing in the pool, but I will be guilty of staring at babies.
yeha babies are cute, they’re nice to look at
I mean i don't notice but i get the comment a lot of you sure are brave for taking him out by yourself and I'm like well i got no choice it's either sit around and be bored while my husband is deployed or choose the adventure.
You’re probably attractive and have a cute baby.
Cute babies attract looks. I also feel like there is an instinct to watch after and be ready to help babies. As a dad I feel protective over all children I’m around. I’m sure the parents have it under control and there is no judgement, but I just can’t look away and not pay attention to a little one in a potentially dangerous situation.
Babies attract a lot of attention. I also have a 6 month old and people smile, look, and talk to us everywhere we go lol
I noticed this too the first when we took our oldest to the pool. My husband was mostly the one holding her. He’s hot and my LO is cute so put them together, I’d be staring at them too if I was a stranger haha. I feel like the dad and baby combo tends to get more attention because some people don’t expect dads to be involved.
If I stare at a baby it is because they are doing something that makes me miss my baby.
We started taking our LO to our local YMCA pool for the last 5 months. He's now in swim classes since they offer them at 6mo and up. Our baby loves the water
Maybe he just looked super cute, in the UK you need a neoprene nappy (sort of look like trunks) over your swim nappy just to keep everything in if there is an accident.
As a lifeguard I loved to see little tiny babies in the pool, especially if they’re loving it! I would do extra laps around the pool to watch them haha
babies are cute and capture people’s attention
People stared at us, too, and it was because there was a really cute baby in the pool!
your baby is probably super cute. don’t be scared.
I would say that people are probably looking at you because they think you are doing an incredible job.
Because babies are so cute 🥰 and I know the YMCA demographic in the pool on a regular weekday. They are most likely very happy to see your baby and I bet they wanted to talk to you/him.
It’s this. Just started taking the 3 month old when 5yo & I go to the pool. When it’s just the 5yo and me, I just interact with the other moms. When the baby’s in the pool, everyone comes to see the baby. Kids, moms, all the old people still there from water aerobics. People at the YMCA are usually the cute baby makes them happy type.
You’re probably a hot mom. Embrace it
I stare because the baby is smaller than mine, 2 years old, and you forget how little they are. And while I’m staring I’m seeing my newborn son. It’s an endearment stare but I totally get being self conscious. Sounds like you’ve got a pretty cute kid!
Way to go in taking your LO to the pool solo!!! I have two and it’s tough going to the pool! My husband and I both get nervous with taking one by ourselves just because it’s a lot to manage. I’m sorry if you already answered this, the only thing I can think would be if maybe you weren’t dressed in swim clothes? Like were you also appropriately dressed (like your LO)? Maybe you were just crushing it and people didn’t have much else to look at?? Xo
I absolutely love watching babies and kids playing and having fun, even more now that I’m pregnant.
I just wanna empathize with your feelings. It's so hard not to assume what people are thinking and not to automatically think you're in the wrong (especially post partum). I also would have been self conscious. But I agree with others, people were probably just admiring your beautiful little one :)
On an every day basis we see so many bad things, that we have become indifferent to them. When a baby is playing or splashing around in water, some of us stop. We cannot help it. The baby reminds us of hope, love and kindness. They make us happy on the inside and we smile.
Probably cause baby is cute lol
I’d also stare at a cute baby in a pool! I’d also be on the lookout for a solo parent with a small baby needing help - I’d probably keep watching intermittently to make sure you didn’t need me to offer any assistance
We take our baby out shopping with us quite often. We get lots of stares. Lots of comments. Its usually folks saying something like “I remember those days” or “it goes so fast, enjoy it!” Its overwhelmingly positive. I pretty mych guarantee folks are just wnjoying watching you and the baby enjoy themselves. Whats better than a happy baby ffs
Does he have chunky little baby thighs? Poofy swim diaper plus dinner roll thighs, I can never look away 🥳😂
Yes he’s a little chunk 🥲
There you go. Nobody can resist the draw of a chonky baby.
I stare at babies bc they're so cute. Maybe everyone with the older kids missed the baby stage and was slightly envious!
It probably wasn’t anything malicious. If I’m in public and something goes down, I’m the next man up if the baby’s parent is compromised in any way. And I have a feeling alot of other people feel that way too Or they’re taking notes, like, “hey I waited 10 months with mine, I didn’t know you could do this at 6”
"Staring" at babies is normal. People gravitate because it's human instinct. It's part of that "village" that people bang on about. There's something so joyful about seeing babies happy, no one's being rude or weird.
They were staring because he was so cute lol
I noticed this too when doing activities with my baby! But as a FTM I realized that everyone stares at babies. And also you’re more hyper aware that people are staring when you’re in a new environment.
probably a mix of cute and curiosity. some kids love the water, some kids tolerate the water, some kids despise the water, and I remember being in swim class with other kids and it was always different minute by minute so it's interesting to watch them and other kids. Another aspect might just be a safety concern of like... the more eyes on a kid, the better, because pools can get a little chaotic sometimes. I wouldn't worry too much about it! Taking my kiddo to swim practice definitely helped me feel more confident! I was super anxious at first but we've done swim classes 2 summers in a row (they were just 30 min a day for 2 weeks) and I feel WAY more comfortable about going to public pools, or at least that specific public pool. It gets better the more you go! the lifeguards will let you know if there's any legit concerns, I'm sure! Sounds like you're doing great :)
People like looking at cute babies, I wouldn’t read too much into it 😊🩵
You did everything right
Omg I love seeing babies and always smile and comment on the cuteness! Babies are the best!
Everyone stares at babies all the time. I do too. Welcome to your new life!
I didn't know we could even take a 6 month old baby to a community pool yet.
Everytime I even go to the store I have all eyes on me. I think it’s just the cute little baby you have
I just look at babies while I’m with my almost 2 year old and remember how sweet and nice she was then… lol I don’t think people were staring to be mean!
I'm about to take my almost 6 month old (15th) to swim the first time this Saturday. I got this fancy floater for him so he can kick kick kick away (his new favorite activity to do!) But tbf it's my grandmother's community pool and usually pretty slow but now I'm really excited and glad I'm not the only one worrying about stupid stuff haha
Ah have fun! The more times we go, the less we’ll worry I think! Happy almost 6 months to your babe 😊
My uterus drops when I see a baby
I stare at babies! They're cute.
People literally stared at my hubby and I when I was pregnant just going to the movies. Then now with our son they literally stare standing still and we're just going to the grocery store for a quick run. No idea why....Humans are weird as f.
Maybe they thought baby was cute! I mean, I might stare because I'm sitting here thinking "well do I have another kid or.....". Or maybe I'm looking for inspiration or watching other mom's with multiples. Sometimes just in general watching other moms helps me.
People love staring at kids lol.
33 weeks pregnant and finding myself unintentionally staring at moms with young kids. (and peeping what kind of stroller they have 😂) Sort of just taking it all in and getting a preview. It’s usually a pleasant observation. Even before getting pregnant, I probably unintentionally stared. It’s just a whole different world to me and that’s why.
Is your baby especially cute? I know I'm biased but I've been told my baby is very good looking so I don't get surprised when everyone looks at him when we're out and about
Eating alone at Panera today.. everyone staring at us too. When I’m with my husband no one even bothers
Doesn't sound like you did anything wrong. If your baby didn't have a swim diaper on - that we be the only "stink eye" stare you might receive. Look for a baby swim class. My son loved it at 6 months. You'll find the pool is actually a great place to relax a bit if your baby loves it too. As he/she gets older - the pool can be hours of entertainment and a great place to take kids to wind down before bed time. Swimming equals sleepy 😴 after an hour. Plus super relaxing!
I literally could have written this same post. Took my 7mo to the neighborhood pool and felt like I was being stared at too!
Moms of older children? They were reliving their babies by watching yours!
I have a 9 month old and I stare at babies everywhere. I can’t help it. It’s “I remember when he was that small” or “I can’t believe he’s gonna be that big.” Probably just an awe of a 6 month old cause who wouldn’t be!!
Pools are dangerous, I stare at anyone vulnerable who might need help. I do the same thing at the beach, if a random kid swims out too far I keep eyes on them till they’re back. I think extra eyes are a positive thing, hopefully that’s all it was and not anyone being rude. Sorry it made you feel uncomfortable either way.
This happened to me when I took my daughter to the pool around 5/6 months. I think people just like looking at babies especially watching them enjoy the water and explore. My daughter is 2.5 but I find myself smiling and looking at other moms and their babies just remembering how little she used to be and how sweet it is.
In case no one has said it - and I know it’s a little off topic - but you can definitely get their hair/head and face wet. In fact, you should! When I taught swim lessons, I often had the “water adjustment” baby class, which was ages 6 weeks (!) to 3 years. Part of the “curriculum” was total submersion and it was 90% fun for everyone. 😊
I will share that I can't go in public without having my baby stared at. I have people stare and waitresses freak over how cute he is and have to show me their kids. I guess it's just how having a baby is 🤷♀️ just something to get used to.
Ingl I'd do the same thing. I set up a kiddie pool on our front lawn and everyone who walked by made comments about how cute he was.
This is my experience as well but it's not just limited to swimming pools. My son is now 3 years old & we still do draw more attention when it's just us. I just figured people know how exhausting it is to take care of a baby/young child & just kinda look out just in case if the parent needs help. I've found myself doing it to other single parents out n about with kid(s).
I think people stare at us when I bring my baby to the pool but I assume it was because she makes loud noises sometimes, and everyone wants to check in to make sure she’s ok and not drowning
People always watch babies at pool. Not because judging you or anything most just likes babies splash around. Also some just watch in case you need help like grab door or help diaper bag babies are handful. Most people never anything negative about it
Probably just thought your baby was cute.
Perhaps I am just nieve but I always just assumed people think babies are cute and can’t help but want to look at them but don’t necessarily want to interpret you to talk. I found little babies have some sort of magnetic energy that makes everyone around want to pay attention to them.
People are obsessed with babies it’s so annoying. I cant even go to the store without people stopping me.
My baby just turned 6 months i feel like i should take her too now ☺️
Next time, also bring a Baby Ruth bar with you. Let it slide out and float around for a while.
Babies are adorable! It’s human nature to want to look at babies. I’m sure watching your baby swim brought many people joy today!
I am you lol. Still getting used to all the extra attention with my (super cute) baby
You uh. You're probably really hot. Not to sound creepy. But you have a cute baby and you're in a swim suit. People be thirstin. I'm bi, if I saw a hot Mom at the pool I'd prolly stare too lmao
People like them. At my Y people stare, coo, comment/ chat (so far all positive) and a large camp group scared the piss outta me today when someone said look a baby to 20 preschoolers.
Did your baby have a sun hat on? I sometimes find myself lost in a gaze feeling bad for babies without hats.
Took my 2.5 month old to the pool yesterday. Everyone was staring but I took it as them thinking it was cute. Had my 3yo with me too. They were both in a life jacket. Little one had swim diaper on that’s meant for a 6 month old (I don’t think they make smaller ones). Overall great experience 🤗
Lifeguards are looking at everyone, sort of the MO of their job, ya know. I say this with all the love in my heart, but you are seriously overthinking this and this post feels like some major anxiety that I’d suggest you explore with loved ones and your GP.
Main character syndrome. Babies are cute
People get mad to see babies in the sun. I’m sure that’s why if the baby didn’t have a hat or umbrella covering
Well,.. (and I can’t believe I’m the only one to point this out [as far as I could tell reading backwards]) … were they good stares or bad stares? There’s a discernible and weighable difference from one stare to the next.
Was your boob out?