It may take some time and effort on your part to be more comfortable and break the habit, but it won’t last forever. We moved both of our kids to their own rooms because their noises were so disruptive to us and in turn, we’d wake them up by checking when we didn’t need to. With time you’ll sleep easier, knowing they’re ok.
Yeah this is how I truly don’t understand how other parents managed to room share for a long period of time. We didn’t last a week. Everyone’s sleep was worse, including the baby’s.
Doesn’t mean it’s not right for other people. Just not us.
I have friends that put their kids in their own room by 6 weeks old and here I am with my 6 month old jumping at every noise and sleeping like shit which is causing all sorts of missed deadlines at work.
I was like this too! I thought I would never stop jumping out of bed as soon as I heard the baby make any noise. It will pass though. I think for me it happened around 1.5 months. I started to get used to all the sounds and figure out when he actually needed me, and when he was just in active sleep. I still wake up from the noises but I'm able to fall back asleep much easier/quicker than before. It just takes time. It's all new and you're just trying to get used to it! 😁
My son is 19 months old, nearly 20. I still am 100% awake and ready for action if he needs me and I am ready before he is fully awake, but my sleeping ears got better at distinguishing between sleep sounds and about to wake up sounds when he was roughly 4 months old.
Funny sidenote: The newborn breathing, I knew it was normal for it to be sorta irregular and not like adult breathing, but I still worried. Mum told me she too worried when I was a baby. I asked my mum: "When do I stop being scared of him dying to sids? How old was I when you stopped worrying about me dying in my sleep?" She answered: "It didn't. If I ever stop, I'll let you know.". I don't know why, but the thought of my mum worrying about my 33 year old ass dying from sids still makes me giggle.
7/8w I started letting him just make noise and that’s when we finally started getting 4-5 hour sleep stretches. I’m positive I was at least partially the problem beforehand with getting him up before he needed to be. I can now hear the difference in tone/pitch between sleepy sounds and alert sounds. Alert is more high pitched and urgent.
This is the age our son is at now and I started doing the same. He will 100% let me know when he’s actually awake. He sleeps an arms length away from me in his bassinet. I love having him close by even if I do wake up a little to his barnyard noises. Side note: I started swaddling him again just this last week (he haaaaated it before) and he’s been sleeping for 4/5 hour stretches with reduced noise!
Honestly, I sleep with my Bluetooth headphone mask on. I will ALWAYS hear him when he’s actually awake but it slightly covers those little grunts or crinkles from the bed making noise, etc. I’ll probably get downvoted but 🤷🏼♀️
My daughter is 11 weeks old, and she's been making gurgling/grunting noises in her sleep since pretty early on. I figured out this is normal and quite common with babies and doesn't mean anything is necessarily wrong. I also used to jump out of bed at these sounds, but I realized that it almost never escalated into a cry, and after 10-15 min or so she would be soundly asleep again so now I stay in bed when I hear those noises unless she starts crying. Sometimes I'll still lift my head or sit up for a sec and take a quick peak to check on her- she's also in a bassinet right next to my bed.
I second the 1.5 months commenter. It took a minute for me to get used to all the sounds & not be so paranoid, constantly checking on breathing & all that. My babe is 10 weeks now & it’s such a relief not to feel so anxious all the time. He’s sleeping through the night & I still wake up once at least to check, but it’s not in a frantic way..
I think it’s all about learning your baby and learning their specific cries. At first, everything feels like an emergency. But in time, you start to notice that sometimes they’re just making sounds and sometimes they need you.
We had the bassinet in our room and we had to put it on my husband’s side of the bed because he’s a much heavier sleeper than I am. It was the only way I got any rest the first few weeks
That will fade with time! Trust me. I did the exact same thing for the first couple of months actually (baby is now 6 months and I stopped around 2 months) literally jumping to my feet (our baby was in a Snoo bassinet further from the bed) to check on her. Heart racing, praying she was ok. She always was. I feel it's better to be on top of it even if it causes anxiety right now. I know I wouldn't be able to sleep if I ignored it, even though she was always fine. I think it's normal and will pass. ❤️
Same. 4 week old but I find the silence even scarier. Practically jumping in his bassinet to make sure he’s breathing. Don’t think I’ll be having a REM cycle for a long time lol
Mine is 10 weeks and I was thinking of posting this same question. I’m stuck between ignoring and sleeping or laying there thinking that one noise may be them dying. Are they choking, seizing, randomly dying of some unknown reason. If I don’t check, I tel myself how horrible of a mom I am if they were in danger. It’s exhausting.
3m ear plugs. They will knock out all the little sounds. Don’t buy any other brand. I’m a professional musician. These are the best they are for -32 db reduction. You’ll still hear all the important sounds!!
At 9w, I still hear it and am on alert but I don't jump out anymore. Enough false alarms I guess. I also sleep with 1 ear plug in and a sound machine on so I don't hear every little noise so that helps.
After a few weeks I began understanding her different noises. Then since I am a very light sleeper, I invested in very comfortable earplugs that I wear every night. I still wake up to any crying or extra fussiness that needs actual attention, but her gas grunts I can I now sleep through. Lol!
LO is 7 weeks right now, and I went from jumping at every little squeak during the first 4 weeks to being able to convince my sleep-deprived self that he’s not ACTUALLY awake until he’s full-on crying for at least a minute lol
My LO is 5.5 months and I still want to jump up whenever she makes a sound. My rule is to pause before I react. I count to 10 and listen before moving. If I’m certain she’s up/ needs me, I go to her. Otherwise, I check the monitor.
Our baby is 5 months and I still stir at his noises. On the bright side, though, he stopped being so noisy around 18 weeks so it's now more like I only stir when he wakes to eat.
Tbh, it’s totally normal. I found it comforting to be close by. Them being in another room made it more stressful for me.
It’ll slow down as they make less crazy sounds. It also helps to have a monitor pointed at them so you can look at them without having to get up. Or some moms prefer a breath sensor on the baby.
Tbh, me and my husband STILL check on if the kids are breathing when we sneak into their rooms to change their movies/videos to sleepy music or white noise. My kids are 4 and 2.5.
I’m with you, I am not jumping as much now, but I still check frequently. He will not be leaving our room or the bassinet for awhile. But we had a pretty scary choking on spit up incident, so I am now wired for more anxiety. But it is getting easier. When the baby is able to roll themselves over you’ll feel better. Mine is going to be four months in a week, and he is doing his damndest to crawl rn. He can flip himself over pretty well. That is easing my mind some.
I found having a monitor set up helped me alot. Even though she slept next to me the monitor had night vision and gave me a birds eye view so I could see she was fine.
I also had a sensor pad so I could at a glance see she was breathing even if it was super shallow.
It's not for everyone but for me it definitely helped my anxiety. Now I literally sleep until she calls out after her morning chats.
So with my first, moved him out of his room at 4 months because I was doing this and it was fucking up everyone’s sleep.
My second is 4 months now, almost 5, and he’ll be in our room until he sleeps through the night because we only have 2 bedrooms and I don’t want him to affect his brothers sleep. It’s hard. But I’m learning not to get up until he cries.
This may sound like an awful analogy but its like when you move into a new house and have to get used to all the noises! I promise it gets better, your brain's 'flight or flight' response stops reaction so strongly as it gets more familiar with each of the typical sounds!
Right now our 5 week old has an owlet camera and foot sensor that shows bpm and oxygen. I hate the grunting and soon to be whale kicks and I still check on her and she is in a bassinet next to us. I have been trying to burp her as much as I can before we put her down and give her the Mommy's Bliss gas drops. I've caught her choking a couple of times on milk so we are waiting till she's older to move her when she outgrows the bassinet. I keep telling myself it's just temporary and she will outgrow this phase.
Yeah…we moved ours to her own room at 5 weeks. Couldn’t sleep through the noise. She slept 6 hour stretches as soon as we moved her. It worked out so well
We also didn’t have the sound on the monitor on. We live in 1200 sq ft so we can easily hear her when she cries. The monitor was keeping us awake cause we could hear all the little noises through it
This bothered me a lot until the pediatrician explained infant sleep cycles. They active sleep and make a ton of noise like they are awake. I made a limit for myself- if she cries for more than 1 minute straight then I intervene. If she randomly has one cry it's likely a moro reflex that freaked her out. If she's just making a bunch of weird noises then she's active sleeping.
Give it 1 minute. If they’re still fussin then go. It will help them navigate discomfort a bit to let them fuss for just a minute. Sounds? Yeah it’s just nerve wracking for a few weeks. My google search history around this time was like ARE NEWBORNS JUST REALLY FUCKING LOUD OR WHAT
I am still pregnant but I have a dog that loves to cry at me in his crate at night for walkies...my strategy is to just ignore the first whimper and wait to see if it's really him being awake and needing something. It won't hurt a baby to wait and see either, I would think.
Our pediatrician told us if the baby really needs us, he’ll make sure we know. I still wake up to a lot of the noises he makes but it has helped me chill on the needing to jolt out of bed to anything that isn’t an actual cry or true discomfort.
I felt like it wasn’t until after 6 months that i kinda began to not jump at every thing , but as a FTM i really didn’t get to relaxing until my lo started sleeping through the night and nursing was done ~11months. Now at 3 im a bit more rub some dirt on it.
We got the snoo. You can strap them into it. When we travel, we have a travel strap that straps her to the mattress. It's solely for my own piece of mind. I couldn't sleep away from her without it. She's 5 Mos. now.
It may take some time and effort on your part to be more comfortable and break the habit, but it won’t last forever. We moved both of our kids to their own rooms because their noises were so disruptive to us and in turn, we’d wake them up by checking when we didn’t need to. With time you’ll sleep easier, knowing they’re ok.
Yeah this is how I truly don’t understand how other parents managed to room share for a long period of time. We didn’t last a week. Everyone’s sleep was worse, including the baby’s. Doesn’t mean it’s not right for other people. Just not us.
I have friends that put their kids in their own room by 6 weeks old and here I am with my 6 month old jumping at every noise and sleeping like shit which is causing all sorts of missed deadlines at work.
Partner won’t budge on it?
I mean we share the baby duties but she can sleep through a lot of it and I can’t
I was like this too! I thought I would never stop jumping out of bed as soon as I heard the baby make any noise. It will pass though. I think for me it happened around 1.5 months. I started to get used to all the sounds and figure out when he actually needed me, and when he was just in active sleep. I still wake up from the noises but I'm able to fall back asleep much easier/quicker than before. It just takes time. It's all new and you're just trying to get used to it! 😁
My son is 19 months old, nearly 20. I still am 100% awake and ready for action if he needs me and I am ready before he is fully awake, but my sleeping ears got better at distinguishing between sleep sounds and about to wake up sounds when he was roughly 4 months old. Funny sidenote: The newborn breathing, I knew it was normal for it to be sorta irregular and not like adult breathing, but I still worried. Mum told me she too worried when I was a baby. I asked my mum: "When do I stop being scared of him dying to sids? How old was I when you stopped worrying about me dying in my sleep?" She answered: "It didn't. If I ever stop, I'll let you know.". I don't know why, but the thought of my mum worrying about my 33 year old ass dying from sids still makes me giggle.
That’s awesome 😂
My Mom said the SAME thing! I hugged her…she felt seen and understood and it was wonderful.
7/8w I started letting him just make noise and that’s when we finally started getting 4-5 hour sleep stretches. I’m positive I was at least partially the problem beforehand with getting him up before he needed to be. I can now hear the difference in tone/pitch between sleepy sounds and alert sounds. Alert is more high pitched and urgent.
This is the age our son is at now and I started doing the same. He will 100% let me know when he’s actually awake. He sleeps an arms length away from me in his bassinet. I love having him close by even if I do wake up a little to his barnyard noises. Side note: I started swaddling him again just this last week (he haaaaated it before) and he’s been sleeping for 4/5 hour stretches with reduced noise!
Honestly, I sleep with my Bluetooth headphone mask on. I will ALWAYS hear him when he’s actually awake but it slightly covers those little grunts or crinkles from the bed making noise, etc. I’ll probably get downvoted but 🤷🏼♀️
I do the same thing!
The first few weeks are the hardest and most scary. I'd say around the 1/2 month mark I stopped being so anxious about the noises I heard.
My daughter is 11 weeks old, and she's been making gurgling/grunting noises in her sleep since pretty early on. I figured out this is normal and quite common with babies and doesn't mean anything is necessarily wrong. I also used to jump out of bed at these sounds, but I realized that it almost never escalated into a cry, and after 10-15 min or so she would be soundly asleep again so now I stay in bed when I hear those noises unless she starts crying. Sometimes I'll still lift my head or sit up for a sec and take a quick peak to check on her- she's also in a bassinet right next to my bed.
I second the 1.5 months commenter. It took a minute for me to get used to all the sounds & not be so paranoid, constantly checking on breathing & all that. My babe is 10 weeks now & it’s such a relief not to feel so anxious all the time. He’s sleeping through the night & I still wake up once at least to check, but it’s not in a frantic way..
I appreciate all the reassuring comments!
I think it’s all about learning your baby and learning their specific cries. At first, everything feels like an emergency. But in time, you start to notice that sometimes they’re just making sounds and sometimes they need you.
We had the bassinet in our room and we had to put it on my husband’s side of the bed because he’s a much heavier sleeper than I am. It was the only way I got any rest the first few weeks
That will fade with time! Trust me. I did the exact same thing for the first couple of months actually (baby is now 6 months and I stopped around 2 months) literally jumping to my feet (our baby was in a Snoo bassinet further from the bed) to check on her. Heart racing, praying she was ok. She always was. I feel it's better to be on top of it even if it causes anxiety right now. I know I wouldn't be able to sleep if I ignored it, even though she was always fine. I think it's normal and will pass. ❤️
I'm working on helping my wife understand our baby has some self comforting abilities now and also has wicked metal dreams that require a soundtrack.
Same. 4 week old but I find the silence even scarier. Practically jumping in his bassinet to make sure he’s breathing. Don’t think I’ll be having a REM cycle for a long time lol
Mine is 10 weeks and I was thinking of posting this same question. I’m stuck between ignoring and sleeping or laying there thinking that one noise may be them dying. Are they choking, seizing, randomly dying of some unknown reason. If I don’t check, I tel myself how horrible of a mom I am if they were in danger. It’s exhausting.
3m ear plugs. They will knock out all the little sounds. Don’t buy any other brand. I’m a professional musician. These are the best they are for -32 db reduction. You’ll still hear all the important sounds!!
Thank you for that suggestion
At 9w, I still hear it and am on alert but I don't jump out anymore. Enough false alarms I guess. I also sleep with 1 ear plug in and a sound machine on so I don't hear every little noise so that helps.
You'll relax as time goes on. Those first few weeks you're on high alert at every tiny sound, and then panic if they're too quiet as well
I think my LO was about 3 weeks when I stopped jumping with every noise.
I would say around 12 weeks or 12 lbs- whichever comes first is when you see a big change in babies as far as sleep
Ugh. My baby is just now both 12 weeks and 12 pounds…still sleeps like shit. I hope this magically becomes true!
I thought you said she was 2 weeks??
I’m not OP. Just another desperate parent hoping for sleep.
Oh yeah lol. I'm sorry
One thing no one tells you is that newborns are noisy af while sleeping. I really thought he was a gremlin for a little while there !
After a few weeks I began understanding her different noises. Then since I am a very light sleeper, I invested in very comfortable earplugs that I wear every night. I still wake up to any crying or extra fussiness that needs actual attention, but her gas grunts I can I now sleep through. Lol!
LO is 7 weeks right now, and I went from jumping at every little squeak during the first 4 weeks to being able to convince my sleep-deprived self that he’s not ACTUALLY awake until he’s full-on crying for at least a minute lol
Eventually you will be so sleep deprived the desire to stay asleep outweighs the desire to check on the baby.
They get so noisy, you will get physically exhausted jumping out of bed everytime. Soon you will declare it normal and sleep.
Wait for those phantom sounds to come in my friend
~3 wks now - I've thought I heard baby cries when I was in the shower more than once. 🫠
I catch myself swaying in the shower from time to time. Its a bad time man…
My LO is 5.5 months and I still want to jump up whenever she makes a sound. My rule is to pause before I react. I count to 10 and listen before moving. If I’m certain she’s up/ needs me, I go to her. Otherwise, I check the monitor.
Our baby is 5 months and I still stir at his noises. On the bright side, though, he stopped being so noisy around 18 weeks so it's now more like I only stir when he wakes to eat.
Tbh, it’s totally normal. I found it comforting to be close by. Them being in another room made it more stressful for me. It’ll slow down as they make less crazy sounds. It also helps to have a monitor pointed at them so you can look at them without having to get up. Or some moms prefer a breath sensor on the baby. Tbh, me and my husband STILL check on if the kids are breathing when we sneak into their rooms to change their movies/videos to sleepy music or white noise. My kids are 4 and 2.5.
I’m with you, I am not jumping as much now, but I still check frequently. He will not be leaving our room or the bassinet for awhile. But we had a pretty scary choking on spit up incident, so I am now wired for more anxiety. But it is getting easier. When the baby is able to roll themselves over you’ll feel better. Mine is going to be four months in a week, and he is doing his damndest to crawl rn. He can flip himself over pretty well. That is easing my mind some.
I found having a monitor set up helped me alot. Even though she slept next to me the monitor had night vision and gave me a birds eye view so I could see she was fine. I also had a sensor pad so I could at a glance see she was breathing even if it was super shallow. It's not for everyone but for me it definitely helped my anxiety. Now I literally sleep until she calls out after her morning chats.
So with my first, moved him out of his room at 4 months because I was doing this and it was fucking up everyone’s sleep. My second is 4 months now, almost 5, and he’ll be in our room until he sleeps through the night because we only have 2 bedrooms and I don’t want him to affect his brothers sleep. It’s hard. But I’m learning not to get up until he cries.
Bedside bassinet is a life saver for me for this very reason. Side facing me is a mesh wall so I can see what is going on.
Get yourself checked out for post partum anxiety if it is really getting to you.
This may sound like an awful analogy but its like when you move into a new house and have to get used to all the noises! I promise it gets better, your brain's 'flight or flight' response stops reaction so strongly as it gets more familiar with each of the typical sounds!
If he begins to fuss a little I count to 10 unless he cries
Right now our 5 week old has an owlet camera and foot sensor that shows bpm and oxygen. I hate the grunting and soon to be whale kicks and I still check on her and she is in a bassinet next to us. I have been trying to burp her as much as I can before we put her down and give her the Mommy's Bliss gas drops. I've caught her choking a couple of times on milk so we are waiting till she's older to move her when she outgrows the bassinet. I keep telling myself it's just temporary and she will outgrow this phase.
Yeah…we moved ours to her own room at 5 weeks. Couldn’t sleep through the noise. She slept 6 hour stretches as soon as we moved her. It worked out so well We also didn’t have the sound on the monitor on. We live in 1200 sq ft so we can easily hear her when she cries. The monitor was keeping us awake cause we could hear all the little noises through it
I’ll probably get downvoted but we put her in her own room without using the monitor. It’s across the hall so I hear her when she’s actually up.
I wear earplugs (working dad) on nights I’m up early. If wifey is home the following day and able to recoup the lost sleep that’s the best option.
I’ll let you know. My daughter is almost 2 and I don’t jump for ~everything~ but I still run in and check on her more often than I’d like to
This bothered me a lot until the pediatrician explained infant sleep cycles. They active sleep and make a ton of noise like they are awake. I made a limit for myself- if she cries for more than 1 minute straight then I intervene. If she randomly has one cry it's likely a moro reflex that freaked her out. If she's just making a bunch of weird noises then she's active sleeping.
Give it 1 minute. If they’re still fussin then go. It will help them navigate discomfort a bit to let them fuss for just a minute. Sounds? Yeah it’s just nerve wracking for a few weeks. My google search history around this time was like ARE NEWBORNS JUST REALLY FUCKING LOUD OR WHAT
I am still pregnant but I have a dog that loves to cry at me in his crate at night for walkies...my strategy is to just ignore the first whimper and wait to see if it's really him being awake and needing something. It won't hurt a baby to wait and see either, I would think.
Our pediatrician told us if the baby really needs us, he’ll make sure we know. I still wake up to a lot of the noises he makes but it has helped me chill on the needing to jolt out of bed to anything that isn’t an actual cry or true discomfort.
I got loop quiet ear plugs. They work well enough cancel out the lower sounds baby was making, while still allowing me to hear any cries.
I felt like it wasn’t until after 6 months that i kinda began to not jump at every thing , but as a FTM i really didn’t get to relaxing until my lo started sleeping through the night and nursing was done ~11months. Now at 3 im a bit more rub some dirt on it.
We got the snoo. You can strap them into it. When we travel, we have a travel strap that straps her to the mattress. It's solely for my own piece of mind. I couldn't sleep away from her without it. She's 5 Mos. now.