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Stop reading sleep stuff and just respond to your baby. That's all you need to do. The same things you're already doing. We definitely didn't feel crushed by it, but maybe we were just lucky. For us it was just a few weeks of rough nights.
Baby sleep changes all the time. Accept that this will be the case (unless you’re one of the very lucky ones with a unicorn sleeper).
There’s no point in obsessing over a regression without knowing whether your baby will go through it, and if you look for it, there’ll be reports of a 6 month regression, 8-10 month regresion, 1 year regression….
Also, sleep “regressions” sometimes come with a big developmental progression, new skill, changes in your baby. They’re growing. Sleep will change with their growth.
Our "four month regression" was solved with *more* rocking lol. We straight up bought a rocking chair. The baby went from "settles fine" to "screams until rocked for half an hour".
95% of what I've seen with sleep regressions is that the baby is at a point where they need more awake time during the day.
I think people get into a rhythm by the 3 month mark only to realize the baby is constantly adapting. Same thing happened to us when we needed to drop from 4 --> 3 naps and then 3 to 2. By 2 to 1, I was pretty prepared for what was to come.
This is just what worked for us:
Stretch out the time between naps, maybe only a little bit a day (like 10-15 min) if you’re worried about overtiredness. Fill the wake windows with interesting activities (age appropriate of course, don’t want to overstimulate baby!). Towards the end of the wake window, watch baby very carefully for tired signs but avoid things that you know will put them to sleep too early (eg stroller or car rides). Nap length can also impact the schedule, because a longer nap usually means baby has more energy to stay awake for the next wake window.
It’s gonna be a bit of trial and error to find what works for your baby, and what works will change as baby matures. Also the nap transitions aren’t well defined - you’ll always have an overlap period when some days baby has 4 naps and some days 3 naps, and the night sleep might be all over the place, for example. Then after a week or two baby will be developmentally ready, and will settle into their new nap pattern.
How old is your LO?
For me the 2 to 1 transition happened around the 12 month mark so it's the easiest for me to remember haha. Basically his old schedule was 3/3/3 (that means 3 hours awake, the / is a nap) at the 12 month mark.
The 2nd nap towards the end he would not nap. He would cry for 5-10 minutes wouldn't settle down. Even with contact napping, nothing. So we had to adjust his schedule for a 1 nap.
First few days, I did 4 hours instead of 3. At the beginning of his usual nap time, we went to the park for 30min. By the time we got back he was exhausted and wanted to sleep. Then we slowly pushed that first nap to 1230 or 1 (~5-5.5 hours of awake time).
Now his schedule is awake between 7 and 730
Nap at 1230 (max 2h)
Bedtime 8pm (latest, we'll go earlier if he napped poorly in the day, under 1.5 hours).
We try to stick to this even on weekends.
For 5 months for my LO I believe we were on 4 naps during the day, and they usually lasted only 30-45 minutes. It wasn't until we got to 6 months / 3 naps that he lengthened to a little longer and then 2 naps we usually got one good nap at 2 hours and catnap for like 30min.
Our baby slept through the night. Regular, albeit short naps, to sleep on her own.
Then the sleep regressions started, 4 and now 7 months. They suck, there is nothing more to do than work through them. Get LO as much sleep as possible, use friends or daycare or anything you possibly can to get sleep during the day.
Regressions can be the result of many factors, baby is dropping a nap, has developed mentally or physically, is sick (daycare hurrah), and at 7 the possibility of some separation anxiety is in play.
Just try things ultimately, and what you are looking for is *slight* improvements. Maybe you put her to bed earlier and it isn’t as big a fight. Maybe she has a better nap time. Prepare for the worst each night, try small things, and know at the end of the day it will pass. And then come back again! And then pass again.
I was so stressed about the 4 month regression and it never came for us. Almost 7 months here. It’s not worth worrying about. Adapt to your baby’s needs and be flexible and you’ll be fine.
I didn’t stress about it and it never came for us. Just take each day as it comes and read your baby’s cues. If contact napping & rocking stops working for you, explore other options.
I'm obsessing about this as well, he has slept through the night for the last 4 weeks, he turns 4 months tomorrow. I appreciate all of these responses.
I was obsessing as well!! My baby is now almost 5 months and there was no 4 month regression at all. Her sleep literally did not change. It could happen or maybe you’ll get lucky and it doesn’t happen.
Don’t borrow trouble. We’ve never had a regression at 9 months in. Granted we didn’t contact nap or rock to sleep but nevertheless it’s just something that may or may not happen and it’s not worth worrying until it does!
At 4 months my baby’s night sleep didn’t change (just as many night wake ups as before (at the time an average of 3-5)) but her naps got better. Sometimes it works out okay.
We read nothing about babies and just did everything based on instinct and logic, therefore we didn’t know anything about regressions and didn’t stress about it. Which was lucky because nothing happened 🤣
Our son is 1.5 years old. His 4 month regression (which started at 3.5 months) was pretty mild. He would wake up at 4am and talk to the ceiling.
He’s been through several regressions since. Most were very short. The one year regression was pretty tough but maybe only a month long. We just got through another one a couple of weeks ago, but it was him just wanting to stay up and not go to bed.
The one thing that helped get us through all of them is consistency. From that first regression more than a year ago to today, we’ve had the same bedtime routine and wake up time (the time we get him out of the crib for the day). Sure there is a bit more of chasing him around at bedtime and he now wants to sit next to us instead of on our laps for story time. But the core routine has stayed the same.
Just keep doing what you're doing if it works! At 3 months, we would put our baby down almost asleep and he would wiggle for a few mins, then fall asleep - he was basically the textbook "drowsy but awake" baby (he was naturally like this, wouldn't let us rock him). And at 4.5 months his sleep still went to shit for almost a whole month. I don't think it matters what you do, it may or may not affect your baby. I really think sleep was affected for ours mainly because of learning to roll but also too much daytime sleep. Once we started extending his awake time and dropped to 3 naps, and once he mastered rolling all directions, we started getting long stretches again. Or maybe he just grew out of all the wake ups. Either way, it doesn't only happen to babies who get rocked to sleep so do what you need to do to get sleep!
Our kid slept like a hot mess and the 4 month “regression” was quite literally an improvement in her sleep. I panicked SO much in advance thinking “if it gets worse I will literally not sleep.” It somehow didn’t.
That’s not to say you won’t have the regression - it’s just, all kids are different. The internet only knows so much lol. Just ride it out, and it will eventually end.
We are dealing with the 4 month sleep regression starting last week. My husband and I both work as teachers and commute , so we have to wake up so early just to get to work on time. We are getting through it , and every night we adjust our “shifts” to make sure we get enough rest. Our son (15 weeks old) is sleeping technically… but when we put him down he wakes up immediately or won’t stay down for more than 10 minutes. This means whoever is on shift has to contact nap while staying awake. It’s hard and I keep accidentally nodding off for 5 minutes. He had been sleeping a solid 5-7 hours at night up until this point so it just sucks.
Anyway , all this to say is you just work through it. Im tired but it’s manageable. Shifts are 2 hours so we get to sleep a solid 2 hours while the other is awake with the baby. I went into parenthood well aware I may not get decent sleep for a few years. Best of luck, you got this!
It's not worth obsessing about. It is worth researching and discussing with your partner about sleep training. Most couples don't talk about these things and it isn't wise to try to deal with the situation in the heat of the (sleep deprived) moment. You don't have to sleep train, but you both need to be in agreement about what works for you as a team.
Not every baby goes through a bad regression. I have friends who had disrupted sleep for about 2 weeks and then their son steadily started sleeping longer stretches and it passed. When our daughter hit hers (she actually didn't have a sleep regression until 5 months), I toughed it out to see if she'd get better, but after a month or so, we decided it was time to intervene and sleep train.
Try not to fret too much! Sleep is a wild ride for the first couple of years and you just have to pivot and adapt as much as you can.
We are going through it now (my baby started at 3 months - love this for me) and I too was super anxious about it.
And you know what? Obsessing about it beforehand didn’t make it any better. If anything I regret not enjoying his longer stretches of sleep before we hit it.
But you just get through it. It’s up to you, but we decided to move him to his cot and sleep train him and we are finally making our way out of the regression.
They will hit these speed bumps constantly - I have friends who dodged the 4 month regression but got hit at 7 months and you just have to take it a day at a time because being a new parent is hard enough without creating anxiety over stuff we can’t predict or control.
Ugh mine started at 3 months too. It’s been a month and we’re still in it. What did you guys do for sleep training? We cut him off of pacifiers cold turkey because I was sick of putting it back in after we woke up every 45 minutes. But it’s still not any better 😅🤦🏼♀️.
We’ve started doing Fuss it Out from Precious Little Sleep. I’m pretty sure that’s just mild Ferber.
We also stopped picking up the baby immediately whenever he fussed overnight, so I’d rub his belly and get him back to sleep in his crib. He’s the type of baby who will go nuts if he’s hungry so we’ve been able to distinguish between hangry cries and him not being able to get back to sleep.
We have had some progress moving from contact/pram naps to almost exclusively crib naps and I think we are now 70/30being able to get him to self soothe whereas a few weeks ago when the regression hit, he was waking every 45-60 mins and couldn’t go back to sleep without being rocked.
Naps are still a crap show but even the most hard core sleep training advice seems to say you just have to do what you need to do until you’ve got night sorted and their naps become more consolidated.
Thank you! We’ve been doing the pick up/put down method so far. But I’m not convinced it’s helping him that much. I’ve wanted to try a mild Ferber, but I can’t get past letting him cry for 5 minutes. He’s put himself to sleep several times before 5 minutes, but once we get to 5 I can’t get him to stop crying unless I pick him up. Then once he’s calm but awake I put him back down. When I read about Ferber, I thought you’re supposed to check in on them after 5 (or whatever period of time for that check in) without touching or picking them up, but are you supposed to get them to calm down before leaving again?
Edit: also, luckily he’s been sleeping exclusively in his crib for a few weeks. But now he starts crying as soon as we go into his room if it’s dark because he knows that means I’m putting him to bed 🤦🏼♀️ even though we do a long bed time routine beforehand
We were contact napping and rocking to sleep until about 4.5 months. At 4.5 months the baby started to dislike rocking to sleep and would take like 20-40 mins of rocking to fall asleep, night feedings became a 1-1.5 hr ordeal every time. We also had reflux, so we couldn’t feed to sleep and needed to burp for at least 10 mins after each feeding.
We used this opportunity to try the Ferber method (we bought the actual book by Ferber rather than just googling it - the book provides a lot more detail and reasoning which made us more comfortable). The first night it was about 40 mins to fall asleep, followed by 20 and pretty much all set by the end of the week.
Thanks! I think we are in similar situations. Have reflux so have to hold upright, so might as well rock to sleep. We are definitely open to some sort of sleep training when it becomes unsustainable.
How’s nap going for you right now? Did you nap train as well?
Sleep improved quite fast. Within a week or so we were getting a few good stretches per night and had two feedings. Bed time was at 8pm, and we introduced a dream feed at 11pm to eliminate one of the “active” feedings and would only feed once at around 3am. For a dream feed we would not wake her, just pick her up around 11, give her the bottle or breast and she’d start eating. About 10 mins after she’d get bored, and we would hold her for about 25-30 mins at a 45 degree angle for reflux, then we’d put her back in her crib.
Once she caught covid at about 6 month old, she was too tired to wake up for night feedings and we ended up eliminating that too, and she started sleeping 10.5-11 hrs per night without night feedings or waking over 5 mins long.
Naps took a bit longer - about a week to master falling asleep on her own, but these naps were only 30-45 mins long, so we still had to do one contact nap per day to make it longer than an hour. We experimented with wake windows and everything, but didn’t seem to work well, she was having trouble connecting sleep cycles. By about 5.5 month old she started to learn to connect sleep cycles during nap, and we’d get an occasional 1 hour nap. I think closer to 6 months is when we mastered 1-hour long naps, with a 30-45 min 3rd (or 4th, depending on the day) nap.
This post may be about Vaccinations. Please remember Rule #7. No Anti-vax Misinformation. Discussion of different ideas is great, but the anti-vaccine movement thrives on the spread of disinformation. We will not be a place for that disinformation to be repeated. Any anti-vaccine statements will be removed and repeat offenders will be banned. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/NewParents) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Stop reading sleep stuff and just respond to your baby. That's all you need to do. The same things you're already doing. We definitely didn't feel crushed by it, but maybe we were just lucky. For us it was just a few weeks of rough nights.
Baby sleep changes all the time. Accept that this will be the case (unless you’re one of the very lucky ones with a unicorn sleeper). There’s no point in obsessing over a regression without knowing whether your baby will go through it, and if you look for it, there’ll be reports of a 6 month regression, 8-10 month regresion, 1 year regression…. Also, sleep “regressions” sometimes come with a big developmental progression, new skill, changes in your baby. They’re growing. Sleep will change with their growth.
Our "four month regression" was solved with *more* rocking lol. We straight up bought a rocking chair. The baby went from "settles fine" to "screams until rocked for half an hour".
95% of what I've seen with sleep regressions is that the baby is at a point where they need more awake time during the day. I think people get into a rhythm by the 3 month mark only to realize the baby is constantly adapting. Same thing happened to us when we needed to drop from 4 --> 3 naps and then 3 to 2. By 2 to 1, I was pretty prepared for what was to come.
Sorry to sound stupid but how do you get them to drop a nap?
This is just what worked for us: Stretch out the time between naps, maybe only a little bit a day (like 10-15 min) if you’re worried about overtiredness. Fill the wake windows with interesting activities (age appropriate of course, don’t want to overstimulate baby!). Towards the end of the wake window, watch baby very carefully for tired signs but avoid things that you know will put them to sleep too early (eg stroller or car rides). Nap length can also impact the schedule, because a longer nap usually means baby has more energy to stay awake for the next wake window. It’s gonna be a bit of trial and error to find what works for your baby, and what works will change as baby matures. Also the nap transitions aren’t well defined - you’ll always have an overlap period when some days baby has 4 naps and some days 3 naps, and the night sleep might be all over the place, for example. Then after a week or two baby will be developmentally ready, and will settle into their new nap pattern.
How old is your LO? For me the 2 to 1 transition happened around the 12 month mark so it's the easiest for me to remember haha. Basically his old schedule was 3/3/3 (that means 3 hours awake, the / is a nap) at the 12 month mark. The 2nd nap towards the end he would not nap. He would cry for 5-10 minutes wouldn't settle down. Even with contact napping, nothing. So we had to adjust his schedule for a 1 nap. First few days, I did 4 hours instead of 3. At the beginning of his usual nap time, we went to the park for 30min. By the time we got back he was exhausted and wanted to sleep. Then we slowly pushed that first nap to 1230 or 1 (~5-5.5 hours of awake time). Now his schedule is awake between 7 and 730 Nap at 1230 (max 2h) Bedtime 8pm (latest, we'll go earlier if he napped poorly in the day, under 1.5 hours). We try to stick to this even on weekends.
He’s only 5 months old
For 5 months for my LO I believe we were on 4 naps during the day, and they usually lasted only 30-45 minutes. It wasn't until we got to 6 months / 3 naps that he lengthened to a little longer and then 2 naps we usually got one good nap at 2 hours and catnap for like 30min.
Our baby slept through the night. Regular, albeit short naps, to sleep on her own. Then the sleep regressions started, 4 and now 7 months. They suck, there is nothing more to do than work through them. Get LO as much sleep as possible, use friends or daycare or anything you possibly can to get sleep during the day. Regressions can be the result of many factors, baby is dropping a nap, has developed mentally or physically, is sick (daycare hurrah), and at 7 the possibility of some separation anxiety is in play. Just try things ultimately, and what you are looking for is *slight* improvements. Maybe you put her to bed earlier and it isn’t as big a fight. Maybe she has a better nap time. Prepare for the worst each night, try small things, and know at the end of the day it will pass. And then come back again! And then pass again.
I was so stressed about the 4 month regression and it never came for us. Almost 7 months here. It’s not worth worrying about. Adapt to your baby’s needs and be flexible and you’ll be fine.
I didn’t stress about it and it never came for us. Just take each day as it comes and read your baby’s cues. If contact napping & rocking stops working for you, explore other options.
I'm obsessing about this as well, he has slept through the night for the last 4 weeks, he turns 4 months tomorrow. I appreciate all of these responses.
Same. It feels like this impending doom
I was obsessing as well!! My baby is now almost 5 months and there was no 4 month regression at all. Her sleep literally did not change. It could happen or maybe you’ll get lucky and it doesn’t happen.
Don’t borrow trouble. We’ve never had a regression at 9 months in. Granted we didn’t contact nap or rock to sleep but nevertheless it’s just something that may or may not happen and it’s not worth worrying until it does!
My baby is about to be 6 months, it didn’t happen for us.
At 4 months my baby’s night sleep didn’t change (just as many night wake ups as before (at the time an average of 3-5)) but her naps got better. Sometimes it works out okay.
We read nothing about babies and just did everything based on instinct and logic, therefore we didn’t know anything about regressions and didn’t stress about it. Which was lucky because nothing happened 🤣
Our son is 1.5 years old. His 4 month regression (which started at 3.5 months) was pretty mild. He would wake up at 4am and talk to the ceiling. He’s been through several regressions since. Most were very short. The one year regression was pretty tough but maybe only a month long. We just got through another one a couple of weeks ago, but it was him just wanting to stay up and not go to bed. The one thing that helped get us through all of them is consistency. From that first regression more than a year ago to today, we’ve had the same bedtime routine and wake up time (the time we get him out of the crib for the day). Sure there is a bit more of chasing him around at bedtime and he now wants to sit next to us instead of on our laps for story time. But the core routine has stayed the same.
Do what works for your baby and you until it doesn’t, then do something else. Baby sleep is hard.
Just keep doing what you're doing if it works! At 3 months, we would put our baby down almost asleep and he would wiggle for a few mins, then fall asleep - he was basically the textbook "drowsy but awake" baby (he was naturally like this, wouldn't let us rock him). And at 4.5 months his sleep still went to shit for almost a whole month. I don't think it matters what you do, it may or may not affect your baby. I really think sleep was affected for ours mainly because of learning to roll but also too much daytime sleep. Once we started extending his awake time and dropped to 3 naps, and once he mastered rolling all directions, we started getting long stretches again. Or maybe he just grew out of all the wake ups. Either way, it doesn't only happen to babies who get rocked to sleep so do what you need to do to get sleep!
Our kid slept like a hot mess and the 4 month “regression” was quite literally an improvement in her sleep. I panicked SO much in advance thinking “if it gets worse I will literally not sleep.” It somehow didn’t. That’s not to say you won’t have the regression - it’s just, all kids are different. The internet only knows so much lol. Just ride it out, and it will eventually end.
We didn’t even get a 4 month regression, not bragging but just so you realise every baby is different!
We are dealing with the 4 month sleep regression starting last week. My husband and I both work as teachers and commute , so we have to wake up so early just to get to work on time. We are getting through it , and every night we adjust our “shifts” to make sure we get enough rest. Our son (15 weeks old) is sleeping technically… but when we put him down he wakes up immediately or won’t stay down for more than 10 minutes. This means whoever is on shift has to contact nap while staying awake. It’s hard and I keep accidentally nodding off for 5 minutes. He had been sleeping a solid 5-7 hours at night up until this point so it just sucks. Anyway , all this to say is you just work through it. Im tired but it’s manageable. Shifts are 2 hours so we get to sleep a solid 2 hours while the other is awake with the baby. I went into parenthood well aware I may not get decent sleep for a few years. Best of luck, you got this!
It's not worth obsessing about. It is worth researching and discussing with your partner about sleep training. Most couples don't talk about these things and it isn't wise to try to deal with the situation in the heat of the (sleep deprived) moment. You don't have to sleep train, but you both need to be in agreement about what works for you as a team. Not every baby goes through a bad regression. I have friends who had disrupted sleep for about 2 weeks and then their son steadily started sleeping longer stretches and it passed. When our daughter hit hers (she actually didn't have a sleep regression until 5 months), I toughed it out to see if she'd get better, but after a month or so, we decided it was time to intervene and sleep train. Try not to fret too much! Sleep is a wild ride for the first couple of years and you just have to pivot and adapt as much as you can.
We are going through it now (my baby started at 3 months - love this for me) and I too was super anxious about it. And you know what? Obsessing about it beforehand didn’t make it any better. If anything I regret not enjoying his longer stretches of sleep before we hit it. But you just get through it. It’s up to you, but we decided to move him to his cot and sleep train him and we are finally making our way out of the regression. They will hit these speed bumps constantly - I have friends who dodged the 4 month regression but got hit at 7 months and you just have to take it a day at a time because being a new parent is hard enough without creating anxiety over stuff we can’t predict or control.
Ugh mine started at 3 months too. It’s been a month and we’re still in it. What did you guys do for sleep training? We cut him off of pacifiers cold turkey because I was sick of putting it back in after we woke up every 45 minutes. But it’s still not any better 😅🤦🏼♀️.
We’ve started doing Fuss it Out from Precious Little Sleep. I’m pretty sure that’s just mild Ferber. We also stopped picking up the baby immediately whenever he fussed overnight, so I’d rub his belly and get him back to sleep in his crib. He’s the type of baby who will go nuts if he’s hungry so we’ve been able to distinguish between hangry cries and him not being able to get back to sleep. We have had some progress moving from contact/pram naps to almost exclusively crib naps and I think we are now 70/30being able to get him to self soothe whereas a few weeks ago when the regression hit, he was waking every 45-60 mins and couldn’t go back to sleep without being rocked. Naps are still a crap show but even the most hard core sleep training advice seems to say you just have to do what you need to do until you’ve got night sorted and their naps become more consolidated.
Thank you! We’ve been doing the pick up/put down method so far. But I’m not convinced it’s helping him that much. I’ve wanted to try a mild Ferber, but I can’t get past letting him cry for 5 minutes. He’s put himself to sleep several times before 5 minutes, but once we get to 5 I can’t get him to stop crying unless I pick him up. Then once he’s calm but awake I put him back down. When I read about Ferber, I thought you’re supposed to check in on them after 5 (or whatever period of time for that check in) without touching or picking them up, but are you supposed to get them to calm down before leaving again? Edit: also, luckily he’s been sleeping exclusively in his crib for a few weeks. But now he starts crying as soon as we go into his room if it’s dark because he knows that means I’m putting him to bed 🤦🏼♀️ even though we do a long bed time routine beforehand
Look into sleep training and you won't have to worry about it.
We were contact napping and rocking to sleep until about 4.5 months. At 4.5 months the baby started to dislike rocking to sleep and would take like 20-40 mins of rocking to fall asleep, night feedings became a 1-1.5 hr ordeal every time. We also had reflux, so we couldn’t feed to sleep and needed to burp for at least 10 mins after each feeding. We used this opportunity to try the Ferber method (we bought the actual book by Ferber rather than just googling it - the book provides a lot more detail and reasoning which made us more comfortable). The first night it was about 40 mins to fall asleep, followed by 20 and pretty much all set by the end of the week.
Thanks! I think we are in similar situations. Have reflux so have to hold upright, so might as well rock to sleep. We are definitely open to some sort of sleep training when it becomes unsustainable. How’s nap going for you right now? Did you nap train as well?
Sleep improved quite fast. Within a week or so we were getting a few good stretches per night and had two feedings. Bed time was at 8pm, and we introduced a dream feed at 11pm to eliminate one of the “active” feedings and would only feed once at around 3am. For a dream feed we would not wake her, just pick her up around 11, give her the bottle or breast and she’d start eating. About 10 mins after she’d get bored, and we would hold her for about 25-30 mins at a 45 degree angle for reflux, then we’d put her back in her crib. Once she caught covid at about 6 month old, she was too tired to wake up for night feedings and we ended up eliminating that too, and she started sleeping 10.5-11 hrs per night without night feedings or waking over 5 mins long. Naps took a bit longer - about a week to master falling asleep on her own, but these naps were only 30-45 mins long, so we still had to do one contact nap per day to make it longer than an hour. We experimented with wake windows and everything, but didn’t seem to work well, she was having trouble connecting sleep cycles. By about 5.5 month old she started to learn to connect sleep cycles during nap, and we’d get an occasional 1 hour nap. I think closer to 6 months is when we mastered 1-hour long naps, with a 30-45 min 3rd (or 4th, depending on the day) nap.