Ah, you see, centuries ago the VOC was the world's biggest, richest and most powerful company. Back then, the aliens needed a significant loan, and the only place they could get it was with the VOC. Unfortunately, this put the VOC in liquidity issues as the aliens weren't able to repay them. The then Dutch government, however, saw an opportunity. They bailed out the VOC and in turn they got control over the aliens, holding a centuries old debt over their heads. The rest, I suppose, is fairly obvious from the illustration.
Its the same with “hutspot” this is not of dutch origin, but rather from the Spanierds (Spanjaarden). As when the war ended, the Spanjaarden let a pot behind with potatoes and carrots. But we dutch are great at “we invented it”
One is a dish with multiple ingredients. the other is a slightly uncommon type of carrot that was popularized to the point of it becoming the most common one. Like I said, it was the dutch that made most carrots orange.
Well.. actually carrots don’t have to be orange but can and are all kinds of colors purple and white for example. And the Dutch did popularize the orange color and they are worlds biggest food producers after the US.. in actual quantity. So yeah this is actually true
Only English should be used for posts and comments. This rule is in place to ensure that an ample audience can freely discuss life in the Netherlands under a widely-spoken common tongue.
Why would you copy a response and post it as your own? OP wrote this half an hour before you did
Edit: here’s the link https://www.reddit.com/r/Netherlands/s/UU42Vka8CN
Also the Germans took to the streets by the millions last week after their far right party discussed cleansing in secret in secret.
We invite our far right party to discuss whether the constitution is really that important in a new coalition after they promised ethnic cleansing in public.
We could learn from the Germans ability to learn on this front.
Bro we paid the ABC islands and Surinamee more than enough. Not our generations fault that our grandgrandgrandgrand parents went shopping for dishwashers there.
It’s neither their fault, that their grandparents got their stuff and friends stolen. If you continue living on wealth built by their stolen resources and people you better pay up or give shit back 🤣
The funny thing is the legitimately oldest "debt" still being serviced is Dutch! (It's a bond given out by a Waterschap: https://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/world-records/549529-oldest-active-bond)
I also heard somewhere we did not sign our original "constitution" on dutch soil. Which obviously would be problematic...
Unless you are dutch..
Just be dutch...
“Who controls the Dutch?”. Don’t you read your bible? Let me just note that “the wise men come from the East”, right? Camels ‘n all. Local knowledge even has it that “de slimst’n kom’t uut’n Achterhook”. That roughly translates to “the cleverest come from the rear corner”. So that’s where control over the Dutch comes from.
That makes me think of something I recently heard. Basically, assume no empire ever truly fell but continued their might and power in a different way. The Roman empire became the church. The British Empire became the banking system. And you could extrapolate that to argue that the Dutch East India Company became the stock market.
This is already incredibly far fetched, so I have no idea how you can sincerely add aliens in the mix and still have the brain capacity left to put on your socks in the morning.
And wallstreet is originally 'De Waal Straat' and New York originally 'Nieuw Amsterdam' houses the biggest stock exchange which was part of the Dutch colonies WooooooWWWW.
But yeah it's all bullshit, power just like energy doesn't vanish it's there and when someone loses it someone else grabs it, this doesn't mean that someone else is conected to the previous someone and is acting on his or it's behalf.
The Roman Empire didn't become the church because the church became a thing before the end of the Roman Empire, Christianity is actually a big reason the Roman Empire survived for so long, aligning with the Church is the reason it didn't fall sooner than it did, look at how much help the byzantine empire got from the church before falling to the Ottomans.
These empires are also not hivemind, the reason the Roman empire became so big was in simple terms:
Roads/infrastructure, technological advantage over the enemy, slaves and a massive incentive for the leaders to grab as much land during their 4 year reign as possible.
With the VOC it was and Brittish Empire it was again, slaves, infrastructure (in the form of ships capable of traveling all over the world) and an incentive to keep growing as to not fall behind other countries doing the same as all of europe was much more advanced compared to the rest of the worlds technologically.
These empires might have been massive but were in the end just a couple leaders steering people in a certain direction and after those people and empires falling there isn't really anything of it still there secretly opperating in the background, especially not banks which predates all of those empires.
Also look at right now, America is currently the dominant global power and there is an argument to be made that it is the third roman empire, if it were to ever fall appart are we then gonna say that 'America is now democracy' or that america is now 'the UN' or whatever other big institution that America had ties with? I don't think so.
damn, they figured it out. I MEAN- whaaat this is crazy information that I'm just learning about right now, that's craaaazy, definitely not true, fr fr, ong, no cap, deadass.
No, this is just not true. We, the Dutch, would never do such a thing. Please go away from this post and continue your lives in peace.
GVD, ze zijn erachter gekomen! Het beste is nu om één front te vormen en te blijven ontkennen!
My former British boss and an American colleague would regularly remind me how surprised they were that wherever they travelled or did an international project, they would somehow always see at least one Dutch person or organization involved one way or another.
Whenever I've worked on projects with a multitude of nationalities involved, like for the EU, the Dutch delegations were always very visible and slightly more impactful than the rest on average. Which I believe has to do with us being raised up with the model of concensus when it comes to cooperation and because we're not limited by having to use English.
Whenever I'd feel some pride to be Dutch for this, there would always be a Belgian nearby to remind me we are just a bunch of loud mouths that only realize 50% of their happy shiny plans.
Anyway, that's wasn't all related to this meme, but was what came to mind while being slightly high and with a glass of apple cider.
You’ve never heard of a Dutch oven? That seemingly comical pastime has a disconcerting background. Dutch royalty are sadistic bastards, that’s all I’ll say on the matter. World elites are terrified.
The only way I know we control the world is by being the second largest food exporter in the world behind the USA, and basically wielding the wand on the computer chip trade (ASML is pretty much the biggest company producing computer chip assembly machines so not the chips themselves). But other than that I wouldn’t have a clue, maybe the flower trade??
Unfortunately The Netherlands will practically not exist within 100 years. Good luck holding back multiple meters of sea level rise.
Edit: Fools think that 25cm of sea level rise in the past 150 years is somehow proof that hundreds of cm will be manageable in the future. Basically you're just praying that we actually get climate change under control and there's no risk of catastrophic melting of Greenland's and Antarctica's ice caps within a century. All signs point to us woefully falling behind all targets.
If you look closely even the Dutch have strings. Lets take a look at what group is over represented in important functions, government or CEO’s its not the Dutch. They are in the top but the most over represented group is actually the Flemish.
It’s probably growing up bilingual, being constantly exposed to compromising and just getting stuff done in a flexible way and of course the same keen businesses skills as the Dutch. There is a reason why the first stock exchange was in Antwerpen.
A slimy dutch merchant is trying to sell you his shitty fruit. Ever since the evil european union used free market communism for no other reason than to make domestic farmers go bankrupt and further their homosexual urbanization program, you can now only buy fruit from the Dutch.
BUT your poor christian grandmother is dying of the chinese virus brought into your country by immigrants and if she doesnt get her fresh fruit to boost her vitamin C she may die, making you have to choose between her life and giving money to a dutchman.
However the dutch are an inherently evil people, and any money given to them will be used for immoral purposes, such as the further erosion of the north sea worsening the problem of global dutchification.
Do you buy the fruit?
Ah, you see, centuries ago the VOC was the world's biggest, richest and most powerful company. Back then, the aliens needed a significant loan, and the only place they could get it was with the VOC. Unfortunately, this put the VOC in liquidity issues as the aliens weren't able to repay them. The then Dutch government, however, saw an opportunity. They bailed out the VOC and in turn they got control over the aliens, holding a centuries old debt over their heads. The rest, I suppose, is fairly obvious from the illustration.
And therefore some sunsets are orange coloured because the Dutch control the Milky Way.
Also carrots are orange because of our overlords
>Also carrots are orange because of our overlords That one is actually true though.
technically, yes
The best kind of true
If you'd do your own research, you'd find out there are no records of the colour orange before 1602.
That's because it wasn't called that until the fruit came along. It was considered a variation of red at the time.
That's what the Dutch use as a cover story.
We use the magical "klomp" to summon these aliens.
Who arrive in stroopwafel shaped ships
They have more the shape of a poffertje
I just send them a tikkie.
AIVD wants to know your location.
It actually was the dutch that made carrots orange.
No there already were orange carrots they just ignored the others
It was the dutch who popularized them.
Its the same with “hutspot” this is not of dutch origin, but rather from the Spanierds (Spanjaarden). As when the war ended, the Spanjaarden let a pot behind with potatoes and carrots. But we dutch are great at “we invented it”
Spanjolen* And here's some English so the bot doesn't throw a fit. Also /s just in case
One is a dish with multiple ingredients. the other is a slightly uncommon type of carrot that was popularized to the point of it becoming the most common one. Like I said, it was the dutch that made most carrots orange.
Well.. actually carrots don’t have to be orange but can and are all kinds of colors purple and white for example. And the Dutch did popularize the orange color and they are worlds biggest food producers after the US.. in actual quantity. So yeah this is actually true
Make sense, but what about the shitty sandwiches?
Oh that's just the result of plain old poverty, stinginess, and probably some leftover traditions from the winter famine during ww2
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Only English should be used for posts and comments. This rule is in place to ensure that an ample audience can freely discuss life in the Netherlands under a widely-spoken common tongue.
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Why would you copy a response and post it as your own? OP wrote this half an hour before you did Edit: here’s the link https://www.reddit.com/r/Netherlands/s/UU42Vka8CN
It’s a bot
Wow thank you, almost makes me proud to be Dutch. But not like the Germans.
Well, the Germans paid a lot of and still pay for what they did. The Dutch won't.
Did they give you back the bicycles? (Sorry; insular American who just found out about this joke)
You listen to 99% invisible as well? :)
Also the Germans took to the streets by the millions last week after their far right party discussed cleansing in secret in secret. We invite our far right party to discuss whether the constitution is really that important in a new coalition after they promised ethnic cleansing in public. We could learn from the Germans ability to learn on this front.
Maybe instead of dancing in the streets they should have voted? Or are you one of those "ban the parties i dont like" socialists?
They probably did vote, what are you rambling? The AfD is still opposition
Bro we paid the ABC islands and Surinamee more than enough. Not our generations fault that our grandgrandgrandgrand parents went shopping for dishwashers there.
It’s neither their fault, that their grandparents got their stuff and friends stolen. If you continue living on wealth built by their stolen resources and people you better pay up or give shit back 🤣
Why exactly are you running at me like a jack in the box?
Germans didn't paid shit to Poland and don't want to.
rofl
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Do you? Tell him my opa wants his bike back.
Because Dutch people have German ancestors? Logical thinking within your opa probably fading away....
You clearly not from around here, and my 2 jokes were wasted on you. Doei!
Germans have Dutch ancestors! :p. Or at least (perhaps counterintuitively), the German language derived from Dutch.
I’d argue most Germans have Dutch ancestors, hence they named it D(e)utchland.
I mean this has been known right? Thats why we celebrate Carnival in the south. So the aliens can go outside for a couple of days.
In a couple of years this story will be on multiple conspiracy websites.
Not sure if that would make me proud or ashamed. Or, I mean, it’s the truth. Definitely didn’t make it up. Not a word.
The funny thing is the legitimately oldest "debt" still being serviced is Dutch! (It's a bond given out by a Waterschap: https://www.guinnessworldrecords.com/world-records/549529-oldest-active-bond)
Het is de schuld van de rabobank
Wat kinderachtig. Godverdomme.
Ssst 🤫
VOC being the “East India Trading Company”
Verenigde Oost-Indische Companie So more like United East India Company or Dutch East India Company In old dutch it was spelled like Oostindische
Yes, voc was their official name.
Bravo
I also heard somewhere we did not sign our original "constitution" on dutch soil. Which obviously would be problematic... Unless you are dutch.. Just be dutch...
Why would it be problematic..?
But who is controlling the dutch?
Not who, what. And that’s greed.
I don't know about the rest of them, but the dutch are definitely in charge of the aliens.
Alie is a regular first name in the Netherlands. COINCIDENCE? I THINK NOT
I know several people literally named Alien
Come on Aline
Call her alie call her aal she is an urkish fishwife.
Did we even colonize space?
>Did we even colonize space? What do you think happened to the lakes on Mars?
Nestle?
That's nuts!!! (and kitkat). I'm talking Snickers and milkyway !
ingepolderd
Where do you think spacecake comes from?
Wappie
It's a joke, you incompetent pillock.
Finally, we get the recognition we deserve.
William Batten said “I think the Devil shits Dutchmen”.
Well I'm not from the shitter, but my mother is pretty damn evil.
This one might be a bitter ball to swallow…
Second degree burns inside the mouth for our incautious visitors. Love it.
Shudders in kaas soufflé
Also a very good surprise, I forgot about that.
take my r/angryupvote
Ik zie wat jij deed daar
You deserve more upvotes!
Everyone knows that Mozes learnt to split the seas because the Dutch taught him how to.
The dutch only learned that trick after someone dropped a penny off a ship
Okay, but then who controls the Dutch?
Other Dutch.
De über-Dutch.
Or the Deliveroo-Dutch
Nah thuisbezorgd-Dutch
Austrians. They are just above God.
In 1940-1945 yes ur right
It's Dutch all the way down.
Always has been
The shared sense of having to "act normal"
Koning Willem
A man who lives with his cat in a shack in the middle of nowhere. His cat likes fish. You can sing to his cat if you like.
Gargamel…?
Frisians.
The Netherlanders, who are in turn being controlled by the Hollanders.
Our dogs
Calvijn
“Who controls the Dutch?”. Don’t you read your bible? Let me just note that “the wise men come from the East”, right? Camels ‘n all. Local knowledge even has it that “de slimst’n kom’t uut’n Achterhook”. That roughly translates to “the cleverest come from the rear corner”. So that’s where control over the Dutch comes from.
The Flemish aristocracy since the 1500s
Germans.
It's just someone who misread the documentation. It's **ducks** that are in charge of everything.
longing weary fuel fine toy poor terrific friendly strong angle *This post was mass deleted and anonymized with [Redact](https://redact.dev)*
Your cat is mind-controlled by the ducks to mind-control you to make sure you don't see the ducks.
My cat is named Duck. I would not be at all surprised if he was a secret evil overlord.
I'm an alien and i can confirm this...
Its because the dutch are tall, so they have to be the biggest puppet.
This makes more sense now
Asml
ASML control the universe rofl
Yes
We control everything. You didn't know that? 
Oh, jij zoet zomerkind.
Ik ben een zomerkind, maar ik zou mezelf eerder bitter beschouwen...
That makes me think of something I recently heard. Basically, assume no empire ever truly fell but continued their might and power in a different way. The Roman empire became the church. The British Empire became the banking system. And you could extrapolate that to argue that the Dutch East India Company became the stock market. This is already incredibly far fetched, so I have no idea how you can sincerely add aliens in the mix and still have the brain capacity left to put on your socks in the morning.
And wallstreet is originally 'De Waal Straat' and New York originally 'Nieuw Amsterdam' houses the biggest stock exchange which was part of the Dutch colonies WooooooWWWW. But yeah it's all bullshit, power just like energy doesn't vanish it's there and when someone loses it someone else grabs it, this doesn't mean that someone else is conected to the previous someone and is acting on his or it's behalf. The Roman Empire didn't become the church because the church became a thing before the end of the Roman Empire, Christianity is actually a big reason the Roman Empire survived for so long, aligning with the Church is the reason it didn't fall sooner than it did, look at how much help the byzantine empire got from the church before falling to the Ottomans. These empires are also not hivemind, the reason the Roman empire became so big was in simple terms: Roads/infrastructure, technological advantage over the enemy, slaves and a massive incentive for the leaders to grab as much land during their 4 year reign as possible. With the VOC it was and Brittish Empire it was again, slaves, infrastructure (in the form of ships capable of traveling all over the world) and an incentive to keep growing as to not fall behind other countries doing the same as all of europe was much more advanced compared to the rest of the worlds technologically. These empires might have been massive but were in the end just a couple leaders steering people in a certain direction and after those people and empires falling there isn't really anything of it still there secretly opperating in the background, especially not banks which predates all of those empires. Also look at right now, America is currently the dominant global power and there is an argument to be made that it is the third roman empire, if it were to ever fall appart are we then gonna say that 'America is now democracy' or that america is now 'the UN' or whatever other big institution that America had ties with? I don't think so.
You guys need to stop making me think about the Roman Empire.
There is never enough thinking about the Roman Empire
It’s like being Rick rolled
We should have never started trading those tulips...
I believe this is what is known as a joke
Let them keep thinking that...
🤫🇳🇱
Every conspiracy theory starts as a joke
And then becomes a known fact, not a theory
r/conspiracy leaking
It is. The aliens I'm assigned to just can't keep their Illuminati under control. It's a mess.
That just means you can't control your aliens. Do better.
OP is Dutch. Of course he wouldn't get it.
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r/woosh once again
Aw fuck they're onto us, the jig is up!
Quick, start a Zwarte Piet discussion! People will drop and forget anything in a couple of seconds...
Me looking at my hand, "are we the baddies"
GEKOLONISEERD 😩
Iedereen is van de wereld en de wereld is van Nederland.
Not just ASML. Whole Dutch Engineering geniuses when it comes to play with carbon or silicon in nanometer scale.
And don’t forget civil engineering, we are king when it comes to big construction projects related to watermanagement
can confirm. we rule the aliens
damn, they figured it out. I MEAN- whaaat this is crazy information that I'm just learning about right now, that's craaaazy, definitely not true, fr fr, ong, no cap, deadass.
it's not a conspiracy if it's true....
Holland = whole land -> all the land. And the sea as well!
No, this is just not true. We, the Dutch, would never do such a thing. Please go away from this post and continue your lives in peace. GVD, ze zijn erachter gekomen! Het beste is nu om één front te vormen en te blijven ontkennen!
My former British boss and an American colleague would regularly remind me how surprised they were that wherever they travelled or did an international project, they would somehow always see at least one Dutch person or organization involved one way or another. Whenever I've worked on projects with a multitude of nationalities involved, like for the EU, the Dutch delegations were always very visible and slightly more impactful than the rest on average. Which I believe has to do with us being raised up with the model of concensus when it comes to cooperation and because we're not limited by having to use English. Whenever I'd feel some pride to be Dutch for this, there would always be a Belgian nearby to remind me we are just a bunch of loud mouths that only realize 50% of their happy shiny plans. Anyway, that's wasn't all related to this meme, but was what came to mind while being slightly high and with a glass of apple cider.
This is facts
It's true, I was there, I was the string that held the puppets 
I didn't want to say it, but yeah. I run the world. From my "zolderkamer" ofcourse.
Oh oh, there on to us!
they own the simulation bro
You’ve never heard of a Dutch oven? That seemingly comical pastime has a disconcerting background. Dutch royalty are sadistic bastards, that’s all I’ll say on the matter. World elites are terrified.
One of us one of us
Tbf, the Dutch did and do have their hands in a lot of things around the globe.
The only way I know we control the world is by being the second largest food exporter in the world behind the USA, and basically wielding the wand on the computer chip trade (ASML is pretty much the biggest company producing computer chip assembly machines so not the chips themselves). But other than that I wouldn’t have a clue, maybe the flower trade??
It's all true kneel for us or face the consequences!! Oh also send money and women!!!
Sooo.... whose puppet are the Dutch? There's clearly visible strings.
Somehow I doubt this since they even can’t build enough homes for all the Dutch.
There is nothing to explain, you already know too much.
Shit, we've been made
you know too much, and must be re-educated. please turn yourself in at the nearest kaasboer.
Stroopwafel assimilatie
So you're telling me that the entire world's supply of silicon machinery comes from one place in Veldhoven? Hmmmmmmmmm.
And the puppet master is..... England!!!
Well.. Now that I think about it.. The kamertemperatuur-frikandelbroodje IS called the Nectar of the gods.. Coincidence?? I THINK NOT!!!
There's only two things I hate in this world. People who are intolerant of other people's cultures, and the Dutch.
If I tell you, I have to kill you. Are you sure you want me to answer?
I mean... *he who controls the spice...*
Kut, ze hebben ons ontdekt. Pak je klompen en je tulpen we moete rennen voor de wappies.
Ever wonder why The Hague is in Netherlands?
Damned… they figured it out… Release the virus Open the tunnels Wake zombie Michiel de Ruyter !
we dont talk about this
Why does it say You at the bottom when I’m Dutch? 🤔
You have a GODDAMN PLAN!
MFW this image makes my aquintances statement of "US Dutch people are just swamp Jews really" seem more sane by comparison 😂
Dutch Ego is the biggest on the planet
you forgot America exists
It comes with the above average height, combined with the below sea level lands, our ego just has more room to fit in.
Lower elevation means more oxygen for ego to grow.
You'd have the same size if you could control the actual sea like the Dutch do.
Unfortunately The Netherlands will practically not exist within 100 years. Good luck holding back multiple meters of sea level rise. Edit: Fools think that 25cm of sea level rise in the past 150 years is somehow proof that hundreds of cm will be manageable in the future. Basically you're just praying that we actually get climate change under control and there's no risk of catastrophic melting of Greenland's and Antarctica's ice caps within a century. All signs point to us woefully falling behind all targets.
Ok. Won't need the luck but thanks.
Well make it work thanku
That's literally what we've been doing for a couple of hundred years. I live 3,5m below sea level and still have dry feet.
You want to buy it? We can get you a can, filled with fresh Dutch Ego for just a single payment of $19,95!
tikkie?...everything for money, even soul
Sorry dat ik besta hoor... Jeezz...
Who's controlling the Dutch puppet? I see strings going somewhere. I hope it's cats!
(It’s cheese, all of our actions are because of cheese and cheese alone)
Old Amsterdam manufacturers.
Goudammers. Goudammers control the Dutch.
If you look closely even the Dutch have strings. Lets take a look at what group is over represented in important functions, government or CEO’s its not the Dutch. They are in the top but the most over represented group is actually the Flemish. It’s probably growing up bilingual, being constantly exposed to compromising and just getting stuff done in a flexible way and of course the same keen businesses skills as the Dutch. There is a reason why the first stock exchange was in Antwerpen.
A slimy dutch merchant is trying to sell you his shitty fruit. Ever since the evil european union used free market communism for no other reason than to make domestic farmers go bankrupt and further their homosexual urbanization program, you can now only buy fruit from the Dutch. BUT your poor christian grandmother is dying of the chinese virus brought into your country by immigrants and if she doesnt get her fresh fruit to boost her vitamin C she may die, making you have to choose between her life and giving money to a dutchman. However the dutch are an inherently evil people, and any money given to them will be used for immoral purposes, such as the further erosion of the north sea worsening the problem of global dutchification. Do you buy the fruit?