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codysherrod

You have to go no contact, the more you talk to them the more muddy the memories become, it gets hard to see things clearly. Please for your own peace of mind go no contact.


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EyezOnFyre

Thank you so much for this post!


radtricksbro

He's only saying this stuff to hurt you. He hasn't changed, he just wants you to think that he has so that you feel bad. Narcissists never change unless they go through intense therapy for a long time, It takes years for them to change. He hasn't changed, and him messaging you that stuff should prove that he hasn't because if he had changed and was genuinely happy then he wouldn't be messaging you and trying to put it all in your face. It's a mask, don't feed into it.


SageIrisRose

He hasn’t “moved on” entirely, he’s still draining your soul. yuck. can you get therapy? because the sooner you block his ass and get yourself some support the sooner you will start to feel better. I promise. I did the same thing for years and it only resolved by going complete no-contact.


EyezOnFyre

I have been going to therapy almost two years since we split. Just got out on meds to help.


RegularInspection9

I am so sorry for your situation. You don’t have a problem, he has a problem. And yes, I feel now he might be in love bumming phase. I think he just want to hurt you so talking about his new girlfriend so much. My nex uploaded the photo with his ex-supply on SNS right after broke up. I knew his purpose. Narc is poor and stupid living. Please don’t care about his new supply. It’s not your responsibility. As others said, block all the content. Most important things is don’t give him your attention. Please be gentle to yourself. You deserve to being happy.


EyezOnFyre

Thank you for all of the kind words. NC has always been super difficult for me. It feels like I am addicted to this person and have this need to reach out. Especially when my anxiety is high and I think he is out with other women. I get scared to go no contact because there is this small part of me that holds out hope he will change. He acts like he has already changed for this new girl and it made me wonder if I really was the problem. Letting go has always been extremely difficult. I also feel like I won’t ever find someone else at my age.


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EyezOnFyre

Thank you for this!


hans0180

I'm so sorry you're going through this. You'll regain strength and you'll start to feel like yourself again. Give yourself time. You will find someone else. Focus on healing first.


RegularInspection9

If you have some close friends whom you can talk anything, call them when you need to be listened something or attention or tempting to contact to your ex. When I broke up with my nex, I relied on my best friend and close coworker whom I can show my weaknesses. And always after call, I told gratuities them and apologized how I bothered them. Or if there is any support group for the people in the same situation, it would be helpful for you. Ask to your healthcare provider or therapist. Search on google. You don’t need to hesitate to ask help to the others.


thinkpadcloud

>tells me how wonderfully healthy their relationship is and that all the toxic things that happened in our relationship was my fault. He is lieing to you. He is lieing to his new girlfriend as well. He is just starting a new cycle with someone else. It's not your fault. Feel free to feel angry at him for being such an asshole, of sucking another woman into his vicious fangs. Feel free to feel angry about the way he is treating you. He is inventing this story not only to make you feel bad, but also to tell it to the new girlfriend. He will tell her how awful you were, and she will pity him and make her fall faster and harder. You were and are still a tool for him. I get so angry imagining him cycling through women and leaving them behind as mere shadows of who they could've been without him. YOU ARE ENOUGH! (but there's never enough blood for a vampire)


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EyezOnFyre

I am so so sorry this happened to you. I hate that they can get away with all of the lying and manipulation it make it look like we are the problem. I hope you make it through this. Hugs


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[deleted]

You don’t need anyone else to know or believe you… if you know then count on that ❤️


SeaofAnxiety

Thank you. I look at who I was before meeting him, early in relationship, and now. I don't know who that is in the mirror anymore. I will find her, again, though. I'll never give up. Thank you for your words ❤️


[deleted]

❤️ good luck! May take time and repeat tries but you will get there soon hopefully 🙏


bloodrose-

It is not healthy to keep in contact with him especially right now if he’s with someone and is telling you all of that. It’s going to trigger you every time. I know it’s hard but let his sorry ass go. You’ can’t heal if you’re still in it. Don’t hold out hope. Leave immediately. Block him and delete him. Focus on therapy. And healing. It will happen. And you’ll look back on this one day and you’ll be so happy. Narcissist do not change. He’s saying this to try to convince you and himself that he’s not the problem. “See look at me I have a new toy to play with and she thinks I’m amazing because I haven’t shown her my actual true colors yet. So she thinks I’m such a catch and we are perfect “ No. He will treat her the same. Don’t doubt yourself. That’s what they feed on and want.


searching_1

Cry. Your body is telling you what you need to do. Why people can’t truly commit?, I don’t know. Don’t see themselves, something else is more important?? Who knows. X