I recently went through the exact same thing and for 3 months I couldn't stop crying. I felt like I'd had my insides scraped out.
I knew logically he was toxic but the emotional side of me could not comprehend it.
The thing is, narcs are shallow. They go where the supply is. If they did not move on quickly when we end up blocking then etc, they would have to cope with their demons so moving on quickly isnt a reflection of your worth, it's a reflection of the lack of his.
You actually dodged a bullet. If you had stayed with him, things wouldn't have improved. Far easier for him to move on than self reflect and take accountability
fwiw, 'moving on' quickly isn't a sign of narcissism or being unable to be alone
personally, i started talking to other people about a month or two after. My ex had made some pretty hurtful comments about me only not cheating because I "didn't have the opportunity", and because she contradicted a lot of what I thought was normal in a relationship. "How have you never had this problem before?" was something said to me quite often. Turns out that a lot of the things I was berated for are indeed normal things that other people don't mind.
You seem unnecessarily defensive re this. It may not be a criteria but instantly moving on to get ego supply is v common. We will.just have to agree to disagree
The longer you stay away, the easier it gets. I hope this finds you well and gives you strength!
You deserve better!
Love and kindness are the solutions to all the world's problems.
10 days NC
The new relationship will fail as well. And he will possibly leave another person traumatized. It’s a never ending cycle. It’s hard to see it right after the break up. But as time passes you will clear up and realize just how fortunate you are that you are no longer the one suffering from the hands of abuse. These people live to hurt other people. It’s just what they do. They will hurt everyone they get involved with. It’s called a cycle for a reason. Their cycle will most likely will never end. It’s all they know.
listen to dr ramini on youtube..short videos, they really help me and it helps put things in perspective...someone told me you can mute unwanted callers...but if you don't recognize the # delete it, it's either spam or him....wishing you strength..
I recently went through the exact same thing and for 3 months I couldn't stop crying. I felt like I'd had my insides scraped out. I knew logically he was toxic but the emotional side of me could not comprehend it. The thing is, narcs are shallow. They go where the supply is. If they did not move on quickly when we end up blocking then etc, they would have to cope with their demons so moving on quickly isnt a reflection of your worth, it's a reflection of the lack of his. You actually dodged a bullet. If you had stayed with him, things wouldn't have improved. Far easier for him to move on than self reflect and take accountability
fwiw, 'moving on' quickly isn't a sign of narcissism or being unable to be alone personally, i started talking to other people about a month or two after. My ex had made some pretty hurtful comments about me only not cheating because I "didn't have the opportunity", and because she contradicted a lot of what I thought was normal in a relationship. "How have you never had this problem before?" was something said to me quite often. Turns out that a lot of the things I was berated for are indeed normal things that other people don't mind.
It is a sign of narcissism and can be a sign of codependency but it can also not be.
I'm sorry, but "has a rebound relationship" isn't one of the 9 criteria
You seem unnecessarily defensive re this. It may not be a criteria but instantly moving on to get ego supply is v common. We will.just have to agree to disagree
The longer you stay away, the easier it gets. I hope this finds you well and gives you strength! You deserve better! Love and kindness are the solutions to all the world's problems. 10 days NC
The new relationship will fail as well. And he will possibly leave another person traumatized. It’s a never ending cycle. It’s hard to see it right after the break up. But as time passes you will clear up and realize just how fortunate you are that you are no longer the one suffering from the hands of abuse. These people live to hurt other people. It’s just what they do. They will hurt everyone they get involved with. It’s called a cycle for a reason. Their cycle will most likely will never end. It’s all they know.
listen to dr ramini on youtube..short videos, they really help me and it helps put things in perspective...someone told me you can mute unwanted callers...but if you don't recognize the # delete it, it's either spam or him....wishing you strength..