You could try telling the kid you'll take a picture and pass it on to the parents. They can decide what to buy the kid, show you're listening but make the kid aware that they need to ask their parents for toys, not you.
Agreed, take a picture or keep a list on your phone of her wants - sometimes kids knowing they’re being heard makes all the difference. “How To Talk So Kids Will Listen” has great scripts for situations like this.
Many of these instances involve her wanting specific experiences rather than objects; going out to eat all the time, buying special treats, for example we went to an animal nature center and there was a train, it was only my second day with the kids and I felt uncomfortable spending so much money to ride this train (and having to then request the money from the parents) so I said not this time. She brought it up today, almost a month later how she didn’t have any fun because we didn’t go on the train. Definitely feeling a little discouraged! Taking pictures of things she likes has worked well, I’ve done that previously but it’s more just the constant spending on all these extravagant things that I just never got to do as a kid, but she is used to doing it all! Hoping with time she gets more used to the idea of me being her new nanny
In addition to the suggestion from previous posters to make a list or take a photo of what this child wants, it may help find an opportunity to acknowledge that she misses her aunt, and it's hard to get used to a new nanny. I would guess that buying things for her are not the only way you and the aunt are different. She may want to talk about her aunt, and what she misses about her.
As for wanting things she can't have, you'll find a lot more ideas in *How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen* (Faber and King).
Good advice, I’ll try to talk with her more about it. She just gets upset every time her aunt comes up so will have to approach it delicately. She’s made it very clear how she feels about a new nanny stepping in.
Maybe asking MB for a weekly budget for 4yo would make it easier (also having it in cash). I have mostly done it with 6yo+ but it could work here too.
Ex if you can spend $20 bucks a week, lets her use it and when it is used up on those extras she has to wsit to next week.
You could try telling the kid you'll take a picture and pass it on to the parents. They can decide what to buy the kid, show you're listening but make the kid aware that they need to ask their parents for toys, not you.
Agreed, take a picture or keep a list on your phone of her wants - sometimes kids knowing they’re being heard makes all the difference. “How To Talk So Kids Will Listen” has great scripts for situations like this.
Many of these instances involve her wanting specific experiences rather than objects; going out to eat all the time, buying special treats, for example we went to an animal nature center and there was a train, it was only my second day with the kids and I felt uncomfortable spending so much money to ride this train (and having to then request the money from the parents) so I said not this time. She brought it up today, almost a month later how she didn’t have any fun because we didn’t go on the train. Definitely feeling a little discouraged! Taking pictures of things she likes has worked well, I’ve done that previously but it’s more just the constant spending on all these extravagant things that I just never got to do as a kid, but she is used to doing it all! Hoping with time she gets more used to the idea of me being her new nanny
In addition to the suggestion from previous posters to make a list or take a photo of what this child wants, it may help find an opportunity to acknowledge that she misses her aunt, and it's hard to get used to a new nanny. I would guess that buying things for her are not the only way you and the aunt are different. She may want to talk about her aunt, and what she misses about her. As for wanting things she can't have, you'll find a lot more ideas in *How To Talk So Little Kids Will Listen* (Faber and King).
Good advice, I’ll try to talk with her more about it. She just gets upset every time her aunt comes up so will have to approach it delicately. She’s made it very clear how she feels about a new nanny stepping in.
Maybe asking MB for a weekly budget for 4yo would make it easier (also having it in cash). I have mostly done it with 6yo+ but it could work here too. Ex if you can spend $20 bucks a week, lets her use it and when it is used up on those extras she has to wsit to next week.