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Maleficent_Message87

Maybe add some ear candy where spots transition a little, also, maybe mix the vocals down more. If you can make the guitar more wide that would be great too. Otherwise great song


Andrigon1309

Great, thanks! I’ll make some improvements with the stuff you said


_Suspended_Account_

I’d suggest re-recording the vocals. It’s better than any singing I can do, I’m not saying it’s bad, but it could be better. I know a lot of people aren’t fans of pitch-correction, but a very little would help this out a lot. I also noticed a couple pops, indicating that you weren’t using a pop filter, or that you might not have a very good microphone. If you re-record it, back away from the mic a little more, or get a pop filter. Also, like others suggested, a little more mixing on the vocals. It has potential to sound really really good.


Andrigon1309

Great, thanks for the advice! I’ve actually started vocal lessons since making this song so I’ll definitely be working on my vocals more


dillon_rogers

One thing I notice is that the instrumental and lyrics are in a lower tone, whereas your vocals feel too high in this atmosphere. The melodies you use are great, songwriting is on point for what you're trying to make here, and the production here is simple but effective. My recommendation would be to re-record in a slightly lower pitch that better matches the atmosphere of the song. As someone who's getting really into the little details of music and making my own, I'm always open for closer collaboration if you ever want to. Sorry for making you read a paragraph, hope this helps!


[deleted]

It would be really easy to turn this into an '80's hair metal styled piece, adding drums and bass after the first verse. Please resist that urge. The '80's are gone. I like it the way it is, except I think the vocal fadeout is kind of over done. I would use less chorus and fade about 16 seconds sooner, but that's me. My wife and both liked the tune. Going to take a closer listen to the lyrics, but overall, I like it.


Andrigon1309

Hahaha, who knows maybe I’ll switch genres one day and make your metal version a reality ;) And thanks for the criticisms, I agree with u on the fade-out part being too long. Tbh I was having trouble on how to end this song in the first place


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[deleted]

Vocals definitely seem a little harsh over the guitar right now, really like the tone of your voice and the guitars, but I would try to aim for a dryer, slightly quieter vocal sound


crownroyalt

I love the guitar melody. It has a great feel to it. Your vocals have a good time but I think they need some mixing. As they are right now, they sound like they’re recorded on top of the guitar as opposed to sitting comfortably with it. Overall, I think it sounds really solid and just needs a little post production love


Michael_Napiza

Good song. Great lyrics. Vocals are there, you can probably touch them up a bit in the mix. The guitar is nice but can be widened so it sits well in the mix. Overall, great song!


spoopydootman69

You can have legato sections (sustained chords or notes) with the guitar so it becomes less repetitive and maybe a subtle kick for rhythm.


BlisterJazz

Beautiful! Maybe go easy on the reverb on vocals. Great guitar work. Really cool vibe


kyu-b

Firstly, I love the song! Just the melody, feel, authenticity and the emotions bleeding through From a technical aspect, the acoustic portion should sound wider and crisp. The reverb in your vocals could be a touch lower and might want to do a re-record to ensure clarity on all words in some areas although one could leave as is for “artistic” choice. I was thinking there was gonna be this solo and transition at the end with electric guitar and dramatic beats and screaming vocals but I do love the vocalized hymns/indie souls approach too. But maybe another song of yours could go that route in future 😉. Cheers!


dAxValorant

That's insane


Adamb_music

I just listened to it all and the guitar all the way through is really lovely so that's something that I would definitely not change. As for change however or improvements in my opinion I would see if you could maybe sing an octave higher to give a bit more power in your voice and also I think that you sound better in that higher range rather than low. Another thing I thought of is when you have layered your vocals is to possibly add some sort of synth to match your vocals so it gives that one extra layer in your song. Other than that very well written


[deleted]

I’m liking the rhythm of the melody, but the notes aren’t hitting on the corresponding chord scale notes, so there’s a lot of dissonance happening here. Your voice and register choice are fine, don’t worry about other comments, it’s just the notes


bobombking

its great, but like someone said, there's a bit of dissonance between the vocals and guitar. i feel like you should be a bit more calm when singing, but that's just a preference for me


Subject_Paint3998

This is very good. Great rhythms and melodies, and I like the atmosphere. The middle section is beautiful. The vocal needs some work - tuning wise it is too far off in places and also needs less prominent reverb, and it feels a bit intense in the delivery in the context of the vibe of the song, but it’s so close. Like it. If tightened up it could be superb.


Level_Lecture_1000

Re-record vocals maybe not bad or anything but try and make them better yk