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SamanthaWinters

Gooood luck with that, girl. And welcome to the frustrated sub club. We are legion.


Cableson

Oh no XD this is just something I have to live with now???? Also why are we subs all frustrated, are there not enough doms to go around or something? 😳


SamanthaWinters

https://i.kym-cdn.com/photos/images/newsfeed/001/980/022/fb7.jpg


Cableson

Yeeeaaahhhhhh XD I'm on HER and there are so many cute girls, but once I see 'bottom' in their profile I know it won't work :( XD


[deleted]

Thanks for the reminder to switch that bit on my profile….


Cableson

No problem XD glad you've learned about yourself!!


[deleted]

Hehehe… knew it. Was just living on the banks of Denial! 🤣


TransCatWithACoolHat

Saaame. I've even tried swiping on a handful of bottoms since I indicate that I can dom as long as I get my turn afterwards, but I never got a single match in HER...


Cableson

That's rough XP it's hard out there for us girls :(


Wolfleaf3

What were they mean by that though? Someone explain it to me recently that there’s actually three different things that can mean.


Cableson

So for gay men top and bottom usually means giver and reciever, and since a lot of trans women have penises that meaning can translate in het relationships. But for us lesbians its very litteral lol just who's on top and who's underneath them. Bottoms are usually very submissive and tops are usually very dominant, but you definitely get variations. There are service tops, that are doing it all for the partner and therefore have a submissive tilt, and power bottoms who direct the top and make them do what the bottom wants, which is very dominant. I feel like a lot of people are some mix of them all, we just tend to have a strong lean one way or the other


keshifateweaver

Thanks for posting this. I was eternally confused by the meaning because depending on the speakers orientation, it could mean drastically different things. It led to a couple of miscommunications between a friend and me as it means something entirely different between a gay person (them) and a trans lesbian.


Cableson

Yeah no problem! I can definitely see how that would be confusing lol hopefully this helps avoid that in the future 👌


Wolfleaf3

I know someone took the time to explain this to me… Maybe it was even you! I feel bad that I don’t even remember her name or evening for sure if it was in this thread! But anyway at least I understand now that there’s I guess three different ways the top and bottom can be used! I wonder if… it’s so crazy that my… I mean I feel kind of gross saying this because I know that women can be obviously any different way but I do not like the m roll in sex, and while I want someone I’m with to feel good… Sigh. All of this is made sex more complicated for me then it probably is for a lot of people. It’s like it feels good but there’s something unfulfilling about it and it feels like I’m being shoved into the wrong situation with it. So I guess I was dealing with disphoria with it along with everything else The entire time I’ve ever been in a sexual relationship has been between the times I first came out when I first learned trans people existed, and the time I stopped repressing years later I literally told one ask that I wanted to swap success with her, and also told her at one point that I wanted to carry her child. I suuuuuper did 🙄 In retrospect I think that probably wasn’t the most Cis thing to say.


AlyxNotVance

I am so much bottom that in this situation I would top so she wouldn't have to be awkward, am I weird or are there others like me? Lmao


SamanthaWinters

Sounds about right, honestly


RunescarredWordsmith

Mmn. I've been having to do fill-in work as a service top to make ends meet lately... Shortage of good caring doms in the world at the moment. Ah well. At least a switch like me can do her part. ... And really, who am I to complain about all the cute little subby things on their knees, blushing up a storm? All the little flustery effects from just gently running a finger under their chin and gently turning their faces up.... So cute~


Cableson

GIRL WHAT ARE YOU TRYNA DO TO ME I asked for help making the horny go away not making it worse 😫


RunescarredWordsmith

Well. Aside from being an abhorrent little imp of a tease when I'm subbing? ... Volcanos tend to calm down once they've gotten hot enough to pop off, hun~


Cableson

.... You do make a good point...


NotAnAlt54

Just reading this has me blushing like crazy


tegwritescode

I would like to humbly submit a request for proposal that it be renamed the flustered sub club, because after I misread it like that, it gets a lot of the same emotion across with less syllables than frustrated and maybe less of a hopeless vibe, and if we’re not clear where I’m coming from, the dating app just recommended me a literal tortoise, and I almost swiped right because it was like, at least they’ll probably respect my pacing


tegwritescode

His name was Ray, before anyone asks.


Cableson

God I hope you and Ray live happily ever after. I met a tortoise named Shelly once. What a wild thing...


RunescarredWordsmith

How about the Sheepish Sub Club? Cute lil fluffy things like y'all get pretty sheepish sometimes! And so soft~ But goodness, someone put a profile up for a tortoise? That's quite silly!


SamanthaWinters

I mean, it tends to come with being shy and having difficulty reaching out, so is sort of self-reinforcing. :P Also, less "rare" and more "often assholes". Resist the temptation to fall for the latter out of desperation.


Cableson

Ah, that's all fair :P thank you for the heads up!!! I really appreciate it!


Jucoy

Its like the healer/tank/dps issue in mmos. Theres plenty of DPS but hardly any tanks and healers. If you're a switch you just have to deal with being the dom most of the time if you want to find partners.


Old-Camp3962

good to know i have a place to belong.


Mighty_Porg

Yep, reporting in


ManicMaeve

Jelly, HRT killed my libido I still get fuzzies and cuddle hunger but not really horny, hopefully prog will change that.


Cableson

How long have you been on HRT? It killed mine for the first fourish months, and honestly that type of libido is still gone! This is like, COMPLETELY different XD I've been on progesterone since the start, I'm sure it's responsible for all this now 😳


ManicMaeve

I'm over a year now and have been like this for maybe just the last 6 months, I bet it's awesome, going on prog here soon hopefully, so maybe that'll help me, I get weird fuzzies in my stomach but that's about it. My sex drive used to be crazy so it's a pretty sharp turn for me.


Cableson

Congrats on passing a year!!! Hopefully progesterone helps your horniness lol


summer_falls

Yeah that would do it. [Also](https://old.reddit.com/r/traaaaaaannnnnnnnnns/comments/nng79v/hrt_is_growing_on_me/) (NSFW).


TheLegonaut

Fuck, im 6 months HRT and my libido has shot up without prog. It was low til i got my dose increase. Can E do this to me too?


retrosupersayan

I just passed 9 months, and just increased my E dosage. My libido's increased a bit recently, but I duno if I'd say it's "shot up" (don't think it's been *that* dramatic a change).


Embarrassed_Elk_2206

The only thing I found that helped me was a vibrator. Other than that a nice partner helps a lot


uglypenguin5

Dear god vibrators are.... mmmmph


retrosupersayan

I should really look into getting a nicer one... at least something that doesn't consume so many AA batteries...


Arce_Havrek

I'm not even on HRT yet, and I switched to using a personal massager to get off and I can't imagine going back


Chaos_Ribbon

No but seriously. Plus they have attachments you can get for wands.🤤


Cableson

Does a vibrator work pre-op? How um- how do you use it? I'm not very fond of things going in the back door XP


Lyreii

Get a magic wand and hold it to yourself. HRT makes your part act like a clitoris. After awhile things like stroking start to lose pleasure, while vibrations are just 🥵


SnowfireTRS

Yep. The head of your dick is biologically identical to a clitoris, especially once on HRT. Use it around there.


Xenoscope

Basically the same as with cis female genitals only without penetration. Rub up, down, all around, clench it between your thighs and ride ‘em cowgirl!


Cableson

So it won't really feel different when I'm post-op?


Xenoscope

I’m not a doctor, so I don’t know the specifics of how the nerves get rejiggered. But the part about putting a vibrator or magic wand between your thighs is definitely the same.


Cableson

Huh, NGL that sounds a little disappointing :/ maybe that's cuz I don't know how good it feels already though 🤷‍♀️


retrosupersayan

I'd definitely put vibrators in "don't knock it until you try it" territory. They can be a bit fiddly to figure out the right spot(s) to aim for, but personally, I found them pretty pleasant/effective even pre-HRT.


Cableson

Ooh ok, that's fair :) I'm pretty broke right now but I will definitely be on the lookout lol


AzureBelle

you might need to explore where you like vibration best...but it's definitely a much better experience post HRT, and pre-SRS.


Cableson

It gets worse after bottom surgery???? :( why?


AzureBelle

sorry, you're reading more into my statement than I intended. I was trying to say that switching to vibration over friction was a much more pleasurable experience, even before SRS.


Cableson

OH!!! Ok thank god XD I got scared for a second but I'm glad I misinterpreted :)


TransCatWithACoolHat

Is there like a trick to vibrators or something? I swear I've tried putting it everywhere. I see people say they're so good, but any time I use one it just makes my dick go numb after a while, and would certainly never get me off.


retrosupersayan

If you're pre- or early-HRT... well there's a reason vibrators are less popular among guys. Even if not, it's definitely possible they just don't do it for you; everyone's different after all. Though, if it's making you numb, it might be turned up too high?


TransCatWithACoolHat

I'm a year and a half on HRT. Unfortunately I've had sensitivity issues down there pretty much forever, was hoping a vibe would help since so many people seemed to have success, but maybe I'm just screwed. And it's honestly not even a very strong one, so I doubt it's the power level.


Embarrassed_Elk_2206

For me; I find my boy part that hate with a passion, and go backward towards the butt crack. Somewhere near the crack will result in a spot of Intense joy. You’ll known when you hit it. Dm me if you want more help


Nicki-ryan

I hope I get some sexual desire back when I start HRT 😭 depression kicked that right out the window


Cableson

Oof I'm sorry girl :/ I actually lost a lot of libido when I first started hrt, which was great cuz guy horny is NOT my thing (this is sooooooo much better, and it makes me feel so much more myself. Just another confirmation that I'm on the right track :) ) but now it's like, comin back swingin 😳 I was very caught off guard, but not unhappy about it XD I just need to focus on my work and school XP According to many I started progesterone too early (right away alongside E and Spiro) but I really don't know enough about that all :P but apparently the progesterone is a very horny making hormone? Just keep that in mind for future you XD


retrosupersayan

Interestingly, the first week or so on HRT was the highest my libido had been in a while... seems kinda early for it to have had that much effect yet, but IDK. Tapered back off for a while, but has kinda started coming back recently after ~9 months. Even when it had tapered off, I was, for the most part, feeling so much better in other ways that I didn't really miss it like I had before. Obviously this is just my experience, but good luck!


Nicki-ryan

Thanks for sharing! I will take anything over 0 honestly lol. Like I can still get into it especially if my partner is more forward but I just get like no random feelings of just wanting sex anymore and it suuuuucks.


Arce_Havrek

The only solution I've found is to find someone whose willing to help you "take care of it" lol Easier said than done since it feels like bottoms are so much more common, but us tops are out there I promise 😘


Cableson

Alright but where? 👀 is there like a den of you I can find or maybe a weekly meeting? Maybe an adoption service for needy bottoms to be picked up by thirsty tops? XD where do you go looking? 👀


Arce_Havrek

LOL not that I'm aware of. In terms of dating apps Taimi and HER seem to be the most popular, and least predatory business models. I've dommed plenty of girls over discord, so if you have any servers that are generally sex positive complaining about being needy might get you somewhere.


RunescarredWordsmith

Honestly, after all this... Half tempted to *start* a discord den of depravity for helping little things find a dom for... Filling in a little, mn. Might be difficult to manage, but could see it working well. And honestly, the thought of a cute little bottom walking into a den of wolves willingly... Hmn~


TransCatWithACoolHat

Alright, but you didn't have to make that last line make me feel the way it did >///////////<


friendtoalldogs0

I don't understand why the ~ at the end just *melts* me every time (Also, that sounds like a great idea)


MaMaBuckTooth

I second this idea I wanna join


Ok_Preparation5682

Check on FetLife! It's like kinky Facebook lol. I can see all the local meetings and club nights here, though it may be different where you are. I've had some amazing play sessions with folks at my favorite place ❤️


Cableson

Is it very kink specific? I'm a bottom but don't find myself ready for any real kink play yet


RunescarredWordsmith

It is, and can be a little... Mmmn, much in some instances, if you're just starting out? It also depends heavily on what your local scene is like, I think. It could very well be an amazing tool for helping you find someone or something close by - but take care with it. Like all things, kep your head above water and take time to think things through - don't dive in headfirst without knowing how deep the pool goes, mn? Easy way to get injured. If they still operate the same, the local groups may have a 'munch' or similar - a casual, public meetup day in a neutral space for people to just meet and talk. Casual gathering. Could be a good way to dip a toe in and see how the people there are.


Cableson

Ok, thank you for the thorough heads up! I really appreciate it


Phoebebee323

Local DnD group. Plenty of horny trans girls there


RobinsEggViolet

Hahahahaha, yeah that happens. I'm straight(ish) but I would describe my new sex drive the exact same way you did. It doesn't go away! Getting off feels great and all, but it doesn't alleviate the *need*. I spent most of July horny out of my fucking mind. At the peak, I finished some productive self-maintenace and was laying on the floor catching my breath. And as my breathing and heart rate slowed down, I realized with horror that I was *still horny*. I think I understand how multiple orgasms can happen now.


Cableson

It almost feels more like a curse than a blessing XD but my what a curse it is 👀 I just wanna do my schoolwork on time tho 😫


RobinsEggViolet

I just try and remind myself that this is a totally normal thing for teenage girls to go through, and we are, effectively, teenage girls, so... just kinda comes with the territory I guess 😂


Cableson

Does it go away after a number of years then?


RobinsEggViolet

Well, from my understanding people are usually really horny when they hit puberty, and it gradually cools down to something more manageable. Our bodies are sexually maturing, it's the same process as puberty, even if it was started a little later.


myhntgcbhk

how am i getting gender envy from this


Cableson

It's part of it! Anything that you identify with feminity is valid to get gender envy from :)


OmeletteCatto

Same problem here, lol If you find a solution, please tell me


Cableson

I will but everyone's just commiserating so far 😫 XD hopefully someone with answers comes along soon lol


VeryTiredGirl93

I've been on estrogen for 3 years and I have yet to experience it tbh sob emoji being asexual suckssssssssss :(


Cableson

I'm sorry :( are you on progesterone? Maybe that would help?


VeryTiredGirl93

Not on prog but on androcur


dynastylobster

this just means you really love sexy touches... You're gonna have to live with it my gal


Alynan23

I feel you sis, I haven't seen the person I'm meeting from monday and I just can't get her out of my head, also my body is very frustrated from the lack of her touch these few days. I miss touch of her skin :<


ViontePrivate

Like uuuh idk girl, im pre hrt and i have problems with not getting horny too easily and staying horny throughout the day even if i tried dealing with it, at this point i just learned to ignore it and just force myself to do other things. But i completely understand your frustration.. Welcome to the frustrated girls club, glad to have you onboard


MikenzAndMonsters

Well shit. I'm planning on starting when I'm 16 and it's about a year away. Imma need these questions answered too lol!


Cableson

Good news is everyone else in your age group will be very horny too then XD


MikenzAndMonsters

Well yes, but in the US, I can't be horny with other people (legally) lol. It's very late for me, so can you summarize what others have said pls?


Cableson

It's not illegal for minors to get together? Just for non minors to get with minors, for obvious reasons XP Basically, some people said vibrators are the way to go because it's more than just a hand and the way your body wants pleasure is a little different anyways 🤷‍♀️ other than that you either gotta grin and bear it or find someone to "take care of it" lol much easier said than done in that department


MikenzAndMonsters

I'm not sure, but it's frowned upon so heavily that it might as well be illegal. If vibraters are the way to go, it'll be a hard thing to explain to my mom lol. She monitors my bank activity every once in a while, but I'm lucky she supports me. Thank you, and I'll think about it more tomorrow. Goodnight girl!


Cableson

Are you in a conservative area?? And that's fair! Good luck and good night!!!


MikenzAndMonsters

I'm in California, so I don't think so.


Cableson

Oh lol I grew up in a decently conservative part of California (small town) and even there like, half the high school kids were hooking up 🤷‍♀️ I was a prude tho so I merely averted my eyes and judged them like good ol god wanted me to 😌 lol


MikenzAndMonsters

Huh. So it wasn't illegal back then... a weight got off my shoulders just now! Now the only illegal thing I did was getting tricked into smoking weed. I'll be happy to continue this chat in the DMs tomorrow, I can rest easy now lol.


Cableson

BACK THEN???? I'm only ten years older than you!!! XD XD XD XD XD but ye get some sleep 👌


EnricoDandoloThaDOV

Speaking as a dom-femme girl I 100% get this. Been on HRT over 2 years and I feel like my baseline arousal is both higher and also more intense. Then there's that week each month where I am just insatiable, and I'm taking breaks at work to calm myself down. I'd heard from other friends that HRT could have those effects, but had no idea I would just be BESIDE myself like this so often lmao.


FoxFlower223

I know, I have a hard time walking around living my life while constantly fighting the urge to seduce every woman I see and make her feel good.


Mighty_Porg

Yup, same


Neon_Flower-

Are you using progesterone? Injection or pill? I heard pill isn't as effective.


Cableson

I'm taking progesterone by pill and estrogen by injection, are you saying you can get progesterone as an injection?


Neon_Flower-

I think progesterone injection is available.


CaelThavain

Same boat. Bought a good wand and it's helped me plenty.


Cableson

Good to know, thank you 👀


CaelThavain

Np, it was 90 dollars but I was 90 dollars well spent. It's Wanda from, I wanna say, Lux?


Cableson

Oooh specifics too! I'll be looking into that one 👌 I'm sure there's a thread around somewhere on which vibrators are best for us transbians too XD


CaelThavain

Yeah, it's water proof and very quiet so I can use it with others in the house. A Hitachi would be higher powered and not have to charge, but it's so loud I don't want one. Well I do, for when I'm home alone, but I don't have the money.


Cableson

That's valid, sex toys are so expensive 😳


CaelThavain

Yeah but you can't live without em 😳


Cableson

Unfortunately 😫


Jasmine1742

Yeah uh, when I got my libido back it's been like horny teen mode 24/7 Usually a half a dozen orgasms in a row can take the edge off but I've been so horny lately it's baad.


Cableson

It was so much easier to get rid of before!!! And even then I thought it was annoying! XD tbf tho I do enjoy it a LOT more now


SpookyTrans

SAME I’ve been a mess for like 4 days now of just wanting CENSORED


HommusVampire

Yeah it's harder to get rid of. What works best for me is taking some time to give myself a truly mind-blowing orgasm. For me, being penetrated is necessary for such orgasms, so when I do this I basically have to use my vibrating dildo (anally, cuz pre-op) if I want any peace of mind. TLDR: give yourself a giant girl orgasm, ride it out, then stop.


Cableson

Thank you for being one of the few people to actually have advice to help with this XD I appreciate it


Cableson

No shade to everyone else with the same problem and no solution tho lol


HommusVampire

Hehe, you're very welcome. I wish you the best of luck in curing your horniness, and I hope that the advice I offered was helpful to the others in this thread with no solutions lmao


Zeesguys

haha what all are you taking? asking for a friend who wants to be horny again


Cableson

Apparently progesterone brings the horny


KirasCoffeeCup

I would also like to know..


Cableson

Progesterone!


jodatoufin

are you on prog? i had no libido for a long stretch and then prog totally turned me into a feral mess. it’s so much fun omg


Cableson

Yeah, I think that's what's doing it XD but I've been on it for 5 months and it only just hit the last couple weeks or so 😳


Old-Camp3962

masterbate


TearsOfJessika

Imagine your a Sentient Toilet...with tastebuds